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#23938
<A-C> The thing is...there have been so many sims expansions, what the FUCK is in the original?
<Lightbunny> I think the original had an installer
<Lightbunny> Other than that Im as perplexed as you
#530
* CM[rebirth] annihilates SumDumGoy with a high energy carbon plasma sphere. (Think DragonballZ "fireballs").
* !SumDumGoy pokes CM.
<SumDumGoy> I win.
<CM[rebirth]> Damn! :O
#214191
<Gnome> Yo momma so fat, Atlas got confused, dropped the earth, and picked her up
#8351
<LULU-LION> yea i finsd hy school and im going to choleg dome ass
#34387
* Wong is trapped in an eternal limbo between sleep and the John Honey Building
<Prophet_Tenebrae> that sounds like an episode of star trek: enterprise
<Prophet_Tenebrae> except too interesting.
#309350
<Proview_> freshman year of college, i'm like... oh, yeah, im going to try and be leet and install gentoo. try loading it frmo a flash drive, 20 minutes later, my HDD was erased, my external 2 TB drive was erased, AND THE FLASH DRIVE gentoo came on was erased
<Proview_> i had to email all of my professors and tell them "i tried installing gentoo and now i have nothing left. my work will be late"
<Proview_> my comp sci professors just responded with "understandable"
#56423
(Nick) hahah wtf
(Nick) girl on tv singing
(Nick) "id like to dedicate this song to my parents. i wouldnt be here tonight without them."
(Nick) NO SHIT LADY
#8425
<RaedonWolf> the shortest day of the year is the 8th of december, the longest day is xmas with your relatives
#189485
<goldfish> I took this little green pill for a headache, on my Granny's recommendation.
<goldfish> I woke up in the backyard three days later, no trousers on, talking to Elvis about the infinite.
<goldfish> Granny was yelling out a window at me, "Get up you baby! I take three of those and do my grocery shopping."
#294527
<nqfud> the local supermarket has an almost completely deaf cashier with a poor quality hearing aid, so she just guesses what you are saying
<nqfud> I said "you walk like your vagina lips are swollen" and she decided to tell me how her christmas day went
#10626
<CompuMan> The tragedy of Canada is they could have had British culture, French cooking, and American technology, but instead they got American culture, British cooking, and French technology.
#6960
<ZXPKNOBB> I invented this incredible cough drop medicine! The side effects include mild coughing.
#30359
< godsmoke> you know ... the FreeBSD devil is called beastie
< godsmoke> it has a name
< Gepeto> Ok
< Gepeto> now I do ;)
< godsmoke> as in ...
< godsmoke> "beastie" ... pronounce that
< godsmoke> slowly
< Gepeto> I see
< godsmoke> B.S.D
< Gepeto> They were on "leastie" when they thought that up
#103486
<Kcaj> Coworker goes "It semms like weed up here". I was like... "Maybe it is my cologne, here check this shit out, smell me", and they come over, I hold out my shirt, they take a huge whiff and go "Yeah, it is definitely your cologone".
<Kcaj> semms = smells
<Kcaj> sorry I'm high lol
#160337
<@Ushanka> So, guys. I was reading a book about steganography, but I've lost my place.
<@Ushanka> This is a really good story about antigravity. I can't put it down!
<Mizzle> I fucking love this book about bibliophilia.
<@Ushanka> I started reading the Wikipedia article on gauntlets but stopped when it got too heavy-handed for my tastes.
<@Ushanka> I was reading the racy memoirs of a Wellington debutante but it made me feel a little sheepish.
<@Jello> I got all wrapped up in a book about bondage.
<Mizzle> I wasn't very far into my text on psychological trauma when I had to stop. It hurt too much.
<@Ushanka> The whole nation is abuzz for the new apiculture guide!
Comment: #thedryeraseboard on espernet
#11222
e l i t e m r p (11:56:26 PM): 80 dagrees 95% humidity
Tom McFarlin 4 (11:56:50 PM): yesterday it was 90 deg and 90humidity here
Tom McFarlin 4 (11:56:53 PM): so i can relate
e l i t e m r p (11:57:47 PM): yeah but im wearing a 300 pound suit of lard
#7786
<nakedpretzel> The pr()n industry uses interlaced .gif's to toy with my fragile emotions...
#15565
pinkboy so, like, how the FUCK do you let your wife get to 1200lbs?
ScottM <pinkboy> so, like, how the FUCK do you fuck your 1200lb wife?
pinkboy I can't imagine that it would be too difficult, unless of course you're picky about finding the real vagina.
#3168
<myst> yeah i suck at snowboarding too
<myst> skiing easier
<Joshua> yeah, i broke my arm and then my dad walked up to my twisted wreck of a body and told me i was faking it.
<Joshua> he wouldn't even take me to the doctor's until my mom came home and yelled at him.
<myst> lol! ah parents
#2956
<blazemore> my chair is starting to smell bad from me farting in it so much
<blazemore> either that or it's the underwear i've been wearing for 4 days
#311648
<ericwood> there's a special place in my heart for americanized chinese food
<Cipher-0> Those are angina pains, ericwood.
#21915
<Major_Tom> anyone know if you can do anything with the USB port on a cable box?
<Major_Tom> I googled, but found nothing
<drwiii> i'm no expert, but maybe you can plug a USB cable into it.
#8262
<jeer> I have to move to mississippi soon..I wish I had a sister or cousin there.
<jeer> who am I going to date?
#70385
oompaloompaboy89: i got into a fight wit a 5 year old
Kuro Desir: o_O
Kuro Desir: OVER WHAT!?
oompaloompaboy89: who is better batman or superman
oompaloompaboy89: i was wearing a batman shirt and this kid wad wearing a superman shirt
oompaloompaboy89: and he points at mine and says "superman is better"
oompaloompaboy89: so i said fuck off and of course since hes 5 he dousnt know what fuck off means
oompaloompaboy89: so we start argueing and it ends with both of us making faces at each other
#307605
<%Klima> Well
<%Klima> Holland seems like a weird country
<%Klima> I've been there once
<%Klima> To Amsterdam
<%Klima> and we slept on a boatel, a boat that is a hotel
<%Klima> That's weird
<%Klima> And people live in shipping containers turned into apartments
<%Klima> that's weird
<%Klima> We tried to take a boat to Amsterdam, and a small car with 3 wheels comes on it, with a DJ blasting techno music all the time
<%Klima> A live DJ, on the back of a small car
<%Klima> blasting techno music on a public boat, with a thousand people on it
<%Klima> and no one complained, they liked the music
<%Klima> the dj was half naked
<%Klima> that was weird
<%Klima> So we get to the red light district, and this was at around 10 o' clock in the morning, and it just STANK
<%Klima> Man
<%Klima> that smell was horrid
<%Klima> It just smelled of semen and poo
<%Klima> so that was weird
<%Klima> We get to a small street where on one side, there are window hookers
<%Klima> on the other side
<%Klima> there's a fucking KINDERGARDEN
<%Klima> Amsterdam is just the weirdest place I've ever been