Random | Latest | Best | Full Site
#6569
<skullY_> <-- Feels really bright now
<barkode> did you get a new lamp?
#12572
<g_smackchik> did you know that it is anatomically impossible to lick your elbow...and 75% of the people who hear that actually try to lick their elbow?
<cochese_04> I've got the statistics in on how much I give a shit...the numbers are dangerously low!
#57685
< Kobi> i think i got the larvae off a stray cat i kept for a few days cause i carried it in my arms and thats where the breakout was
< Kobi> they have already came out twice in diarea
< gulagula> had nits on it?
< Kobi> yeah
< gulagula> damn
< gulagula> nits out the arse
< gulagula> makes me not want to leave the house in case I bump into someone like you
< gulagula> no offense
#28747
<xcp> I left a windows xp cd on the seat of my car, someone broke in and left 2 more.
#4380
<Spork> A man looked at me like I was a pervert today. I was checking him out at the store and he had his kids at me I noticed one of his young daughters had her zipper down and you could see the print on her panties, so I pointed it out to him. He looked at me weird for a second then zipped her up.
<Spork> Maybe it's because he thought I also noticed that he was half-erect in his pants.
<Spork> Which he was.
#2753
<vman_> wow
<vman_> 2 iranians in here
<vman_> amazing
<vman_> IM NOT A MINORITY ANYMORE U STUPID FUCKS
<vman_> HAHA!
#49239
<looksofat> i got 17 cents for food in the next week but i got CoD 2 preordered and pre-payed and IT OWNS ASS
#13524
<TunnelArmr> Cool! I finally found the Womrs 2 demo
<TunnelArmr> I mean Womrs 2
<TunnelArmr> I mean Wrms 2
<TunnelArmr> Worm 2 even
<TunnelArmr> GOD DAMN IT!!!!!!!!!!
<ThePython> having trouble saying wrmos Tunnel?
<ThePython> i mean wmros
<ThePython> i mean mrwos
<ThePython> GOD DAMNIT!
#240606
< whatsinthename> whats the command to turn on conference mode for this channel
< doub> just "hi!" is sometimes working
< inflex> change your nick to something like Sweet16Candy
#305261
* anarkoid has joined #ipsofacto
<anarkoid> HEY GUYS
<anarkoid> WHAT'S UP
<Save> lol caps much?
<anarkoid> oops
<anarkoid> i was writing youtube comments heh
#238597
syberghos : Wives are like video games; they're lots of fun to play with, but it's all over once you beat them.
#33108
<Phaedrus> note to self, dont use the aliases page in mIRC as a note pad
#29311
<duxr0x>...
<duxr0x> i told u u couldn't amputate a cats leg with a goddamn toothbrush you dumbfuck
#10660
<MEEPY> COULD SOMEBODY HELP ME!? I WANT TO PLAY DOOM2 OVER NETSCAPE, BUT CAN'T FIGURE IT OUT. I LOAD THE IDSOFTWARE SITE IN NETSCAPE , THEN START DOOM2 AND JOIN A MAP BUT I NEVER SEE ANY PLAYERS? IS IT JUST THAT THEY ALL LOOK LIKE MONSTERS? IF THAT'S THE CASE, I THINK I'M REALLY GOOD!!
#311003
<manderson> I decided to surprise visit my mom for thanksgiving.
<manderson> She answered the door and asked, "can I help you?" and looked confused.
<asterick> hah
<manderson> Yeah, then it all went downhill.
<manderson> It took less than 5 minutes before she asked me to fix her computer.
<manderson> You haven't seen me in two years and *that* is what you want?
#151875
<Jex> we made a mmo game where you are a member of a popular development team with an army of a few hundred clients demanding updates and the goal of the game is to prolong development as long as possible without getting e-murdered
Comment: #tremdev@freenode.net
#307356
<@Shifteny> Ok, I just did something really stupid and I was glad nobody was over in this office today to see it
<@Shifteny> I have this really nice, very warm fleece pullover I keep in this office because it gets cold over here sometimes
<@Shifteny> it has a drawstring in the waist
<@Shifteny> well, I've been wearing it since lunch because I was cold
<@Shifteny> I started getting hot, so I decided to take it off
<@Shifteny> I didn't notice that I was sitting on the drawstring
<@Shifteny> so as I was trying to pull the garment over my head, the drawstring kept tightening around my waist
<@Shifteny> so I was stuck there for a minute trying to figure out why I couldn't get it off
<@Shifteny> flailing around, trying to pull my arms out so I could get un-stuck
<@Shifteny> it was like the fleece pullover equivalent of a Chinese finger trap
#42280
<Arundor> I'm starting to regret taking a philosophy course. It's getting very irritating that I can't strangle the authors of some of the more idiotic philisophical arguments I've had to read.
#7885
<Halcr0> If I had a knife, I'd shoot you
#32198
RyanIsL33T: HAHAAH
RyanIsL33T: HALF TIME SHOW
RyanIsL33T: JANET JACKSONS BOOB FELL OUT
SpAz0Licious: WHAT
SpAz0Licious: BULLSHIT
SpAz0Licious: WHEN
RyanIsL33T: AT THE END OF THE SHOW
SpAz0Licious: DID YOU GET A PIC?
RyanIsL33T: NO
SpAz0Licious: DAMNIT
SpAz0Licious: its gonna be all over the net in like 10 minutes anyway
RyanIsL33T: yeah
10 minutes later:
SpAz0Licious: http://66.98.142.98/~volume/janet/JANETSBOOB.jpg
SpAz0Licious: HAHAHA
SpAz0Licious: I TOLD YOU 10 MINUTES
RyanIsL33T: ROFL
#27459
<spazzer> last chick I screwed she hurt for a day afterwards
<spazzer> i got the nickname "the hammer" at work now from that
<spicrx7> hahaha
<spicrx7> spazzer works at a day care center
<spazzer> eww
<spazzer> you pedophile
<spicrx7> i'm not the one bangin 10yo's so hard they hurt for a day afterward
<spazzer> 35 year olds you mean
<spicrx7> yeah in dog years maybe
#39860
[23:03] <@tH> my friend's buying an ethernet switch from dell
[23:03] <%spazizoner> WHAT
[23:03] <@Knifa> LOL
[23:03] <@tH> and in the online checkout
[23:03] <@ReadMe> stop them, quick
[23:03] <@tH> it asks you
[23:03] <@tH> Q4. Will the product(s) be used in connection with weapons of mass
[23:03] <@tH> destruction, i.e. nuclear applications, missile technology, or
[23:03] <@tH> chemical or biological weapons purposes?
Comment: We told him to tell him to awnser yes... not sure if he did it tho
#103191
23:31 < avoozl> hmm there is a disk failing in my machine
23:31 < avoozl> going klunk klunk every half an hour
00:01 < avoozl> the bad news is that the disk is really dying
00:02 < avoozl> the good news is that i cannot find any mount points/raid entrys/lvms that actually _use_ that disk
#3763
<[ric]> as the old joke goes, commodore is so bad a marketing, if they bought KFC they would rename it "warm dead bird"
#55084
<fruitkat> .... and four aprons.. but still SIX KNIVES!
<fruitkat> and theres one called the 'stiff boning knife'
<fruitkat> ohhhh yeahhhh.
<fruitkat> im pretty much going to be boning dead animals.
* thousand has changed the topic to: <fruitkat> im pretty much going to be boning dead animals.
<fruitkat> ah crap.
<@thousand> Sorry, it had to be done :)
Comment: #qc