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#14709
<deltax> i saw a dog teabag another dog today
#27200
<ecchi-oni-misha132> i watched legally blonde 1 in the hospital
<Frostbiteh2o> heh
<Frostbiteh2o> how was it?
<ecchi-oni-misha132> found it mildly amusing with the help of opiats
#3604
(snpr^): 1337 = l33t = leet = elite = ghey
#48616
<doopidub> euh, now compiling kernel
<doopidub> how long does it take?
<Phlip> doopidub: usually no longer than it takes to make a cup of coffee
<doopidub> okay, brb making coffee
<Phlip> as long as you include the time it takes to grow, roast, etc the coffee beans
Comment: #blenderchat on freenode
#6552
* dagbrown *FINALLY* got licenses for his fucking Sun development environments.
<dagbrown> Sun's licensing department must have the slogan "WE HATE YOU AND WANT YOU TO DIE"
#31996
<Sean> What some people don't seem to realize is that not everybody spends every waking moment surfing the world wide web. Some of us read email before going out and checking out favorite web pages, web comics included.
<Sean> Some of these same people may have email readers that can read upwards of 100 lines at a time, so blocktext spoiler warnings are not always effective.
<Jacob> Dude, if you can display 100 lines at a time in your email client... you're probably a geek who spends every waking moment surfing the World Wide Web.
#11512
<Gudrow> I hope I get hired
<jre> wear a miniskirt to the interview
<jre> show some leg and some nutsack
#31763
<Rumpelteazer> have you ever drunk hand cream
<Rumpelteazer> I don't feel at all well
<Rumpelteazer> the original bottle broke, and all I had handy was my old coffee cup.
<Rumpelteazer> the bottle broke when I tripped over an old ps2 controller my husband had attatched to my computer for unknown reasons
<Rumpelteazer> and I returned to my desk with a big cup of coffee.
<Rumpelteazer> and I mixed the two cups up.
#44967
<SmallKiwi>: my lil stepson has been vomiting at school for the last 2.5 hours
<SmallKiwi>: and i was out getting groceries
<SmallKiwi>: and the only number they called was HOME PHONE
<SmallKiwi>: WTF
<SmallKiwi>: I HAVE CELL PHONE
<SmallKiwi>: THEY HAVE MY CELL #
<SmallKiwi>: They have like 3 emergency contact #'s, anyone of which could've contacted me
<SmallKiwi>: but no
<SmallKiwi>: they call my HOME PHONE ONLY
<SmallKiwi>: FUCKING INCOMPETENT JERKS
<Guyp>: :|
<Guyp>: it's time to prove to your step kids that youre worth a damn
<Guyp>: sometimes that means dying
<Guyp>: sometimes that means killing a whole lot of teachers
Comment: Sin City <3
#21658
<Guo_Si> Hey, you know what sucks?
<TheXPhial> vaccuums
<Guo_Si> Hey, you know what sucks in a metaphorical sense?
<TheXPhial> black holes
<Guo_Si> Hey, you know what just isn't cool?
<TheXPhial> lava?
#14904
<drunker> whats's the microsoft.com site
#129207
<miska> does anyone know how to change sex in WoW?
<SaxxonPike> When you play WoW, sex won't ever change
#55564
<Swishy> the star trek article on wikipedia
<Swishy> is larger than the intercourse article
<Swishy> SURPRISE!
#35080
<Lewko> Do you want to have lunch?
<BenK> Sure. What did you feel like eating?
<Lewko> Anything, as long as it used to frolic in a meadow!
<BenK> Hippies?
#10837
<Keeper> ooooh, another dead mouse
<Keeper> I think it was a radioactive mouse too, cos as soon as the mousetrap snapped, the TV reception died for a second
<Deke> keeper has mice?
<Keeper> not anymore :P
#53043
<MajorDeath> Anyone else having trouble connecting to the forums?
<Chuck_F_Norris> I know what your trouble is.
* Chuck_F_Norris roundhouse kicks MajorDeath in the face.
<Chuck_F_Norris> Problem fixed.
<MajorDeath> doh
<MajorDeath> nope, that didn't help!
<MajorDeath> do it again
* Chuck_F_Norris roundhouse kicks MajorDeath in the groin.
<Chuck_F_Norris> I can't fix ugly people, but i can prevent them from making more.
#6126
* nailer/#lgl is a chocoholic. But for alchohol :)
#306677
<maxson> honestly
<maxson> it's weird because
<maxson> normally, i'd get to know her better before asking her out
<Leaff> you're asking for relationship advice froma 12 year old?
<Leaff> oh
<Leaff> ok
<maxson> the only way i'm going to get to know her better is by asking her out
<maxson> so it's like a dilemma
<maxson> also yes
<maxson> irl this would be creepy
<Leaff> yup
<Leaff> irl me hanging out with you would be creepy
<maxson> yup
<Leaff> irl a lot of things that people do on the internet would be creepy
<maxson> like talk to people while looking at porn
<Leaff> exactly
<maxson> "hey james how's it going"
<maxson> "HRRNG oh fine URRRGH you?"
<Leaff> "are you fapping"
<Leaff> "LOL NOPE NOT AT ALL"
<Leaff> "DON'T EVEN KNOW WHY YOU WOULD SUGGEST THAT"
<maxson> "did you piss your pants"
<maxson> "you're in the ballpark"
<Leaff> i think we should end this part of the conversation right now
<Leaff> before it gets
* Leaff sunglasses
<maxson> out of hand?
<Leaff> out of haFUCK YOU
#15689
<rone> OH BY THE WAY WE'RE BEING ACQUIRED. AGAIN.
<rone> hey, at least we didn't merge with tab.net
<PetrDoubt> Yes, we did.
<PetrDoubt> Verio owns tabnet.
<rone> o fuck
#245406
<gabe> mozilla and this java chat seem to hate each other
<gabe> maybe it will be better on IE
<gabe> fingers crossed
<Xyzyxx> gabe, you should download a real IRC client
<gabe> yeah. and get a virus? no thanks
<Xyzyxx> irc clients don't usually come with viruses :P
<gabe> zonealarm would beg to differ
#10714
<Joe_> <DarkVeng> if you wanna just be a yesman, there are thousands of jobs in corporate amercia that have better hours and better pay for less work <-- where are they?
<Technogeek> Enron.
#16489
<zamros> WHEN I WAS LIKE SEVEN I SAW A CAR GET RUN OVER BY A CAR
<zamros> MY FIRST CAR ACCIDENT WITNESSING
<zamros> AND/OR MONSTER TRUCK RALLY
#303898
<AndrewBC> My favorite password is "incorrect"
<AndrewBC> that way when I get it wrong, they remind me
<AndrewBC> "Your password is incorrect"
#297160
< MYOB> Borders' website just died entirely on me in the middle of a satisfaction survey
< expensivelesbian> ha ha
< expensivelesbian> "how would you rate our website?"
< expensivelesbian> on a scale of 1 to 404
Comment: freenode
#49727
<Neo> simps....
<Neo> can you setup PHP-Nuke?
<Neo> or post-PHP?
<simps> wtf is PHP
<Neo> ok. that answers that