Random | Latest | Best | Full Site
#74903
<caddis> the hardest thing about buying a macbook is telling your parents you are gay
Comment: server: irc.ruxcon.org.au, #ozphreak
#16708
<Vile-> i need to take a shit
<Vile-> im going to go in my cats litter box
<Vile-> and my mom will go up stairs
<Vile-> and see a huge long shit in the litter box
<Vile-> and be like wtf
#21300
<Okie-Narc> Found this bowl of "Cookies and Cream" ice cream in the kitchen. Gee ... now I'll be up all night worrying about trans-fattys acids.
#756
<folly> and anyone who tells you you can is a moron.
<folly> (or a windows admin, which amounts to much the same thing)
#64256
(+wolrah) I need to get a job building fire extinguishers.
(+wolrah) I just realized the greatest way to say "I quit"
(+wolrah) Fill them with gasoline
#47823
<TheYamiUsagi> Halo is like Christianity. It's probably okay, but the ignorant fan base ruined it for me.
#16270
<aba> el job search soy el puta
<dave__> ahahahaha.
<dave__> translation
<dave__> <aba> the job search i am the fuck
#297989
(334): I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
#56295
<TheMouse> Aurora, CS at jouse of pancock
<TheMouse> pancakes
<TheMouse> PANCAKES
<Aurora> PAGING DR. FREUD
#31961
<terminal_> fuck i hate answering the phone here
<terminal_> "hello, planet earth"
#33984
<Wooben> Girls are all afraid of me too :(
<Wooben> I did go out with this one girl
<Wooben> but she was really scary
<Wooben> I decided i was scared
<Wooben> So she called me and i told her she was really ugly
<Wooben> so that was the end of that
#46290
<Tigs> i used to try not to swear
<Tigs> then one day i thought
<Tigs> Fuck it
#56643
<b0b> fucking hell dude
<b0b> i hate when the salsa in the jar gets low
<b0b> and I try to get it out with a chip and it gets all of my fingers
<b0b> and i just end up crying myself to sleep with my fingers covered in salsa
#18884
·bdjuf· Customer: "How much do Windows cost?"
·bdjuf· Tech Support: "Windows costs about $100."
·bdjuf· "Oh, that's kind of expensive. Can I buy just one window?"
#7194
<nit`zZz> I was lovin that pussy while she was lovin this dick, I was shovin it in her while she was yellin dont quit
<NGN-_-> Then you realized you were dreamin that shit - in real life your a no-pussy gettin prick
#81446
ATH0: I don't know why the Korean guys at school love Steve so much.
ATH0: He doesn't look too Korean.
Batman: He told me.
Batman: Basically, he beat them at StarCraft and became their king.
#32099
<^gangster> jalljo: and btw, whats marijuana?
<jalljo> its a hacker term.
#15454
[Shinji] my pants are pretty disturbed too!
[Shinji] then again, you'd be pretty disturbed if you spent your life this close to my crotch.
#19400
(willay): sex+workplace doesnt work i think!
(XorA): unless you are a whore
#61545
<+DaDead> are you hot?
< sadaiy> if i was hot i wouldn't be looking for friends over the net
#21
<Tempy^^> I'll settle for old and fat
<Tempy^^> begger can't be choosers
<Tempy^^> prolly find used condoms inside of her
#56271
< WakkoWRNR> I am a proud member of PETA
< WakkoWRNR> People Eating Tasty Animals
#1627
<Zonkto> I'll bet you could ski through a revolving door if you timed it really well.
#15508
<fff> back when my ancestors were apes, they were better than your ancestor apes
<fff> my ape ancestors had richer culture than your ape ancestors
<fff> although when our ancestors were amoeba, i'll concede your amoeba ancestors were smarter than mine
#1497
<MrP-> i have pillows shipped UPS so when i get them they are already pre pounded and fluffy