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#33227
* Drummer_B has joined #emu
<Drummer_B> may i ask if this is a roms channel?
<nylint> drummer_b: all you have to do is !list
<Drummer_B> ahhhhhhhhhh ok thanks :)
<Drummer_B> !list
* Drummer_B was kicked by nylint (auto-kick: no triggers or roms, bitch!)
* Drummer_B has joined #emu
<nylint> and you'll get kicked
<nylint> i didn't tell you what it would DO
Comment: #emu efnet kthxbye
#22491
<@timmo> <Tw1zt1d> I've only learned one thing about IRC over the years
<@timmo> <Tw1zt1d> It's that if you talk, you get banned
<@timmo> Approve Kill Nothing
<@timmo> thats funny because i banned him
#30566
<Mediator> hmm....that troy movie looks awsome....I'll be able to jackoff to orlando bloom without having to watch lotr
<@Phucker> assumes 'orlando' is female.
<Mediator> your assumtion is wrong
<@Phucker> Jesus.
<Mediator> orlando bloom is legolas in lotr
<@Phucker> Jesus x2.
#11708
<Nighters> I've decided that if i'm not happy when i'm 40 i'm going to kill 2-3 people who are like 18-19 with BRIGHT ASS FUTURES
#1201
<RevSlidey> a baby seal walks into a club
#304051
<@Recnilgiarc> In about 5% of patients, it can instead cause inadvertent orgasms when yawning.
<@Recnilgiarc> this shit is going to be awesome
#76974
<zashi> I could get a few pounds of unrefined uranium
<Red_Herring> your ass would be in guantanimo before i could figure out how to spell 'guantanimo'
<Red_Herring> which in your defense, ill never figure out how to spell
#307796
< er1c_> im curious to know about your knowledge of the tensile strength of a vagina though, vhost-. Â or maybe not
< craige> He was a large baby
< craige> We should leave it at that :p
< vhost-> dude, they can squeeze hard
< vhost-> a penis just kind of sits there, then it raises a little bit, but still just sort of stays there
< vhost-> you can't flex your balls
< er1c_> i um... saw my daughter come into this world. Â i was adamant about not looking but the fucking nurse kept telling me i needed to see the miracle. Â words fail me at describing that horror scene
< vhost-> ~(:D)~ OH HAI
#6661
<enrol> pure fucking godfather of IDM
<jj_> whats IDM
<jj_> is it
<jj_> INTENSIVE DICK MAINTENANCE
<enrol> intelligent dance music
<jj_> oh
<jj_> close enough
#31285
<hep> fo0 is a premature ejaculator?
<G3-Game> cock mizer?
<fo0bar> hep: only when I'm around you
<G3-Game> scrooge mccock?
<kingmob> ewww
<kingmob> that's pretty bad
<dmose> cocksocket
<kingmob> cause remember what scrooge used to do in his money?
<kingmob> like, roll around in it and swim in it and stuff
<kingmob> now i'm picturing...ecccchhh
<kingmob> just...ecchhhh
<willo> with his nephews
<aykroyd> ack! /clear, dammit!!
<kingmob> ecchhhh!
<fo0bar> willo: thank you for further tainting my view of childhood
<ogw-iii> oy
<willo> anytime.
#1655
<JD> I, or one of my teammates, shall cause you to become electroencephalographically challenged.
Mr Brown> ill kill you
<JD> No, I like the way I say it better
#258726
<AtoB> I needed an extra xp cd, so i downloaded one and formatted my computer. When i was about to reinstall, i found out that i had forgot to burn the cd...
#16971
<ncc386> It seems to be an oral fixation that drives me to smoke and when I quit 3 weeks ago I started eating more. If that's the case there is a healther, cleaner, more fun oral practice that could satisfy me.
#16230
([m1]) teresa do you remember what i told you about the playground mentality of guys?
(resa) playground?
(resa) they only think about sex?
([m1]) no teresa
([m1]) that boys in elementary school would pick on girls they like
(Mog2) i'd hate to know how teresa connected the playground to thinking about sex
#302359
<st0rmb0x> I had an ass cannon moment
<Ka1enov> LOL
<st0rmb0x> You know when you're on the shitter and you just fart but you don't realise you shat 12 feet of shit in half a second
<Ka1enov> yeah man
<Ka1enov> and then when you wipe
<Ka1enov> theres nothing
<Ka1enov> youre are like what the fuck
<st0rmb0x> lol, yeah man, these things are deadly, what if you were to shit down a balcony, i bet you'd be able to break car windshields
<st0rmb0x> Or snipe someone with a turd
<Ka1enov> and walk away with no evidence
<st0rmb0x> The police are like, what the fuck, there's shit everywhere and that guy has a hole in the head
<Ka1enov> and your ass is clean!
#300909
Actual Chris: facebook is telling me to write on your wall too
Chaos: wow
Chaos: fuck you facebook
Chaos: everyone knows I'm pathetic just leave it be
Actual Chris: haha
Chaos: "hey, make sure this guy doesn't kill himself okay"
#84532
<Nightripper> Ah, airport security. After 9/11, things got hectic. My way is simple, direct, and effective.
<mcfuzzhead> what's your way?
<Nightripper> "Weapons are mandatory."
<Nightripper> Don't hijack this plane, no sir. Granny's packing a machete!
<Nightripper> "Sir, you didn't set off the metal detector. I'm gonna have to ask that you take this pistol with you."
#11648
<Homer> Hydrac7: $400 Cdn or less now, get a job for like two weeks
<Hydrac7> How much is that in USD?
<Homer> like $12
#28353
<pL1> atomic clocks are for wussies... i use the sun to tell the time...
<Blaxthos> sun doesn't sync well
<Blaxthos> with the 8 minute lag and all
#91
<MntLKeY> heh, i made up 'heh'
<Amanda`> That's a pretty outrageous claim.
<MntLKeY> i've being sayin it since 96
#2877
<AlmtyBob> Groups such as Cyberangels and Pedowatch have picked up the slack by enlisting thousands of volunteers across the globe to scan the Internet for lurid images of children.
<AlmtyBob> wow
<AlmtyBob> sounds like my kind of job
<AlmtyBob> and to think, I'm doing it for free as we speak
#11178
<niles> If you use that logic, then using a completely open and unsecured network would be ok if you sealed the computer in a locked metal box, since it would deter physical attacks by baseball bats (ALL attacks are of equal value, right?). Or you could say that adding the line "WWJD" to the telnet login prompt would be a valid defense since it would lower the instance of attacks by Christians by 80%.
#24030
<kmad> today, me and jake were playing tennis
<kmad> this mom with her son, like 11 years old, were watching us play
<kmad> a ball was hit over to them, so I ran over to pick it up
<kmad> the kid asks me, "How did you get so good at tennis??"
<kmad> I think for a second, try to hold back a grin
<kmad> "Drugs."
<kmad> The mom gave me a big old FUCK YOU and stormed off with her kid
#894
<dovee> anyone using or have an imac?
* macker looks over at the door
<macker> nope, they replaced the door-stop with a real one...
#44030
<sidewinder> has he ever looked at M theory?
<Alliance> the theory that M likes to kick me?
Alliance was kicked from #homeworld by m (i think this is called a 'proof')