m.QDB.us

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#93196
(+Mandrake_Barbosa) omfg.. just sneezed 8 times in a row
(@Cajun) 7 sneezes = orgasm
(+Mandrake_Barbosa) i tried it. by forcing myself to sneeze, using pepper. i really thought it would work (was in like yr9) so i did it without pants on with a few tissues next to me

#2061
<|shark|> if a guy took a home pregnancy test
<|shark|> and it turned out positive
<|shark|> what does that mean?
<Merl> shark.. go see a doctor man ;-)

#34532
<ron_frown> oh god... this guy comes in and talks to my boss about why his phone doesnt ring loud
<ron_frown> so my boss opens it up and ends up frying the mobo
<ron_frown> I throw a new mobo in there and it rings the same volume
<ron_frown> ends up the dipshit had a sticker over his ringer and it severly muted it
<ron_frown> something that could have been a 5second fix
<ron_frown> took a day, and cost him a mobo which was like 30
Comment: #php

#12254
<Art`> I don't want to work with people, I'm not a big people person
<Saccy> I thought you wanted to be a surgeon?
<Art`> Well they're under general anaesthetic, I don't have to talk to them.

#12193
<missing> a chick walks by, u wish u could sex her
<missing> but ya standin on the wall like u was poindexter!
<akaIDIOT> since when is sex a verb?
<corngrits> i had sex
<corngrits> isnt that a verb ?
<ceraph> no, thats a miracle

#18496
<Temptrezz> Do you ever find yourself going out to dinner with people you can't stand
<Cokecan> All the time, I call her my girlfriend

#7326
<JtHM> chick + tat = filthy
<JtHM> any girl who has a tat is a whore. if I've learnt anything from pron, that'd be it

#60331
<brisbane> I got a knock on my door and as i was expecting a girlfriend I was naked, I opened it and it was two Jehova Witnessees. Needless to say they didnt stay long and never came back.

#12
<Moot> ok, here's what we do
<Moot> we break into AOL HQ
<Moot> and instead of the AOL setup utility, we put metallica mp3s on all of the startup cds

#13629
<Flirbnic> The American dream is to move to Canada.

#42769
<cooltim> fuck christmas shopping sucks. The gifts given/recieved ratio seems to drop as you get older. christmas used to be good.
<meaty> Yep. There's no upload quota. :(
<cooltim> That's right. there should be some sort of law, stating that total cost of gifts given only has to be proportional to gifts recieved.
<meaty> Absolutely. At least some sort of shaping system where the receivers of low-priority 'Christmas traffic' understand the circumstances, as agreed to in the EULA.
<cooltim> lmao
<morphix> lol
<meaty> Perhaps superior prezzie traffic should be assigned higher priority the next year, thus encouraging the receipt of data which is significantly more tangable than socks.
<meaty> And we all know the evil that is bestowed on socks. On average, 33% of them mysteriously go missing every wash.
<meaty> Presents are a total waste of precious bandwidth.
<meaty> We need a protocol like Bittorrent, only for presents.

#30957
<nomad> everything loads so fast on this computer
<nomad> I have no time to decide what I will do next

#303631
<nukespoon> me and my brother are watching the same stream on our own computers
<nukespoon> i am half a second faster 8)
<Sebas> Make sure he doesn't catch up
<Sebas> You don't want to cross the streams

#20485
<cspan> I wonder what IRC was like before the internet

#310474
<TheHackOps> I thought i was paranoid because I encrypt all my business emails
<TheHackOps> Get a letter from ISP asking why i am doing it
<TheHackOps> So yep
<TheHackOps> Some desert island is looking pretty good guys
Comment: irc.freenode.net ##security

#1325
<immi> a penny for your thoughts
<dr\gonzo> a nickle for anal with your mom

#7247
<sylwia> I'm drawing black people
<sylwia> for a poster for my english class
<sylwia> I think I made tham too black
<sylwia> you can't really see their faces

#295376
<Kryptik> Yugioh?
<DBSK> Yush
<Kryptik> What are you in, middle school?
<mistah_j> yugioh was a fad at the high school I used to go to
<mistah_j> like there was a table full of yugioh nerds who played it all through lunch
<mistah_j> I'd see them and think "haha, what a bunch of fucking losers"
<mistah_j> then I'd go home and hack nes roms
<mistah_j> :D

#4016
<djglitch> i'm thinking about getting the front desk chix number just to see if i still have it in me
<djglitch> she is sexy
<tyne> lol
<tyne> u got her number
<tyne> "0"

#32106
<tinglanchio> kthx
<tlozoot> ok frmo now on don't respond with just "word" or "kthx" beacuse I have to read this stuff
<tlozoot> and when you respond the background goes black and I can't read it
<tlozoot> k????//
<tinglanchio> okay
<tlozoot> very funny asshole.
<tinglanchio> word

#50573
<Ragnara> 02:58:23 <Supuun> hay guys
<Ragnara> 02:06:32 <Libido> Hay.
<Ragnara> TIME PARADOX
<Ragnara> Oh wait
<Ragnara> Daylight savings

#27213
<CheesyP18> surprised my 7" monitor has VGA
<@dabu> wait, u mean it's a separate monitor?? a CRT?
<@dabu> haha, and u wanna encode on that?
<CheesyP18> yea
<CheesyP18> my computer is up to scratch tho
<@Billy|B-A> my dicks bigger than your monitor =\

#17813
<Raikenku> "Recent study shows Mac users are often more educated than Pc users"
<Magus> that's because any idiot can use a PC
<Magus> but it takes an art degree to use a mac :D

#299680
<TugC> hey anyone want some freshly tested proxies?
<Syn> yes
<TugC> xxxxxxxx.com/xxxxxx
<Xero> i want some too TugC
<Xero> holy
<Xero> fucking
<TugC> i tested all of them today in charon
<Xero> HEY
<TugC> what
<Xero> ONE OF THOSE IS MY SERVERS IP
<Xero> YOU FUCKING FUCK

#4500
<vecna> Holy fucking christ, lord and savior, show us your tits, that's a lot of ZSNES ASM code

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