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#10015
<RageATM> im allergic to porn it makes my dick swell
#17429
<BluBandit> hello kitty is one cat i'd like to violate
#16175
<KAboomy> I used to be afraid of bees
<KAboomy> now I'm just afraid of mayonaise
#5527
<slide-> hah, of course their site has popup ads
<eevar> get opera.. - never seen a popup i don't want
<slide-> iv never seen a popup i do want
#6096
<#seattle/sisSoul> navy guys are fat ugly and squatty
<#seattle/yoplait> girls just like the title 'able seaman'
#12292
Daeg says, "We are watching the dead deer show."
Una says, "A whole show about dead deers?"
Daeg says, "It seems to be."
Una says, "This isn't that Canadian soft porn channel again, is it? :)"
#52268
<Sc0rian> i keep putting my fucking boxers on back to front
<Sc0rian> wtf is wrong with me
<RotoSequence> I think you want to let the cock in from the backside
#46698
-dmwaters- {global notice} Hi all.... erm, that netsplit was my fault.... I accidently killed the wrong process on the wrong box. I'm very very sorry for that... Thank you for your patience, and thank you for using freenode...
#311083
<@DigDug> in russia you're now going to get fined for sharing instructions on how to use a vpn or otherwise avoid the countrywide firewall
<@|silicon> apt-get install openvpn
<@|silicon> bam
<@|silicon> :o
<@normod> shut up |silicon, you'll get fired
<@|silicon> fired from what?
<@|silicon> please don't say a canon into the sun
<@DigDug> |silicon: that will be 50000 rubles
* normod furiously pushes backspace
<@DigDug> STOP RESISTING
<@|silicon> is that a gay couple kissing and dumping vodka into street?
* |silicon runs
#3407
<timmo> and it involves a girl named bertha
<timmo> WHO WOULD SUBJECT THEIR DAUGHTER TO THE HORRORS OF THAT NAME
<timmo> 'this is my daughter bertha, she eats villages'
#6785
<LordSuggs> and i got a new 19" monitor at work
<DeLorean> I can just imagine THAT interview; "...and how big was the monitor at your last job?"
<LordSuggs> heh
<LordSuggs> well my monitor isnt the only thing about me thats massive ;)
<DeLorean> heh
<DeLorean> ego
#51440
<marena> ill ring the clubs and shit within a few weeks
<dux0r> i'd suggest you shit beforehand, u may explode
#16428
<WeaselBoy> livejournal is nothing but thousands of people all saying "Does this make my ass look big?" at the same time
#4397
<Sassy> if the GC ends up sucking, i will start calling it the LameCube and reap the benefits of my witticisms
#6812
(user1) whio'
(user1) is awke?!?2
(user1) aggha
(user1) aned to think i oepratd a motr vejcal
#1117
<hypr> WE IS TO CUT OFF ALL SUPPLIES OF VODKA TO YOUR SHITHOUSE COUNTRY
#17373
<LoRdZephyR> i cant swim
<roboman20> i thought only people with down syndrome couldnt swim
<LoRdZephyR> WELL YOUR WRONG WHORE
* roboman20 hands zeph a chromosome
#16188
<wof> does anyone really use emacs?
<Pills> my wife used to
<wof> really?
<wof> what'd she do?
<Pills> she... edited files? :)
#12851
<Jallak> Now, see, what you've done is just given me this mental image of this prepubescent girl dressed as a boy on stage, addressing the audience and telling them "Tinkerbell thinks she might become well again if little children believed in sex"
#1498
<steef> i feel sorry for kids today, when they reminisce on their childhood, they will have songs by britney spears and backstreet boys
#20459
<deathazre> somebody stole twish's vanilla cock
<deathazre> er, coke
<deathazre> ^_^
<TheOrgasmicMe> mmm vanilla cock
<whatboy> maybe it was missy elliot
<whatboy> o.O
<TheOrgasmicMe> if cock tasted like vanilla i would be gay
#11130
<InvalidUser> Its like my Uncle Eric used to say, he'd say... "IU, lookit
the ass on that guy" To which I'd reply, "I'm not gay Eric", and he'd say
"Oh yeah, sorry bout that" and we'd laugh and laugh. Then he'd try to
molest me.
#15434
<juji> but i'd have to learn japanese to play half of its games :)
<z2-Fool> you don't speak japanese?
<z2-Fool> and you're a slope?
<z2-Fool> :)
<juji> :(
<juji> i'd cry
<juji> but i cant fit tears through my chinky eyeslits
#28813
<dharmakid> are you guyz sure that God hates fags? My brothers gay,,,does God hate him?
<n0thing> yes
<n0thing> god hate him
<tfg> yes
<tfg> Everyone hates him
<n0thing> includling me and tfg
<tfg> but ofcourse
<dharmakid> poor poor unenlightened souls....God is the source Universal love...hi very nature is incapable of hate...I feel compassion for all of you...you will be doomed to repeat the process of birth,life and death until you learn this Truth...
* dharmakid has left #god.hates.fags
<n0thing> he must be gay
<n0thing> like his brother
<tfg> yeah
#258726
<AtoB> I needed an extra xp cd, so i downloaded one and formatted my computer. When i was about to reinstall, i found out that i had forgot to burn the cd...