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#32734
<jwz> the last wasted ten minutes were brought to you by ghostview, kswapd, and a 1.2GB X server
<jwz> let's hear it for everyone involved

#7308
<DarkImportGrey> god there's nothing greater than using people to your advantage
<DarkImportGrey> well... bowel movements are quite rewarding...
<DarkImportGrey> but it's close
<DarkImportGrey> manipulation vs. dumping
<DarkImportGrey> i guess i'd have to do both at once to see which would win

#3687
<OutLore> your the moron that believed us, i's not my fault your tent fell in the river

#12115
<log> im done dling it, now i just need to pick up my new comp so i can run it properly

#10204
<Mr_Grinch> i just burned my nose hair
<Mr_Grinch> by trying to smell the flame of my lighter

#13883
<Nall> I'm so confused everytime I come in here. Either stop changing your names, or like, start cybering with me, so I fucking remember you.

#14304
ElectromagneticPhantom> there's like this monster, stooping over a dead body, it looks up at the camera, and as it moves, the heavy skin shifts and folds over itself in places and IT LOOKS FRELLING *REAL*
Lyme> Okay, PHant, I read that sentence, and thought you were talking about dick.
ElectromagneticPhantom> yeah
Lyme> I reread it like, 3 times, and I still think you're talking about dick.
Lyme> Are you talking about dick?
ElectromagneticPhantom> but this monster has no eyes, I think. and four legs
ElectromagneticPhantom> and claws and stuf
Lyme> Four-legged dickmonster
ElectromagneticPhantom> and nasty teeth
ElectromagneticPhantom> and it eats people
CommandantCleavage> four-legged dick monster? You mean men?
Lyme> four-legged clawed cannibalistic dickmonster
ElectromagneticPhantom> it is NOT a dickmonster!
Lyme> It only eats other dick.
ElectromagneticPhantom> STOP IIIIIIIT

#39251
Searcher> Man, all my MacGyver'ing is going to come back and kill me.  I just know it. Next to my bed, I have a chair stuck in the corner of the room.  On either side of the corner, I have a two-by-four wedged.  On top of the two-by-fours, I have a dowel rod duct-taped. Hanging from the dowel rods, just kind of hooked over the top, I have a fan, oscillating. Sitting on top the inverted fan's base, I have a speaker. One day, that speaker is going to fall on my head.

#7627
<Ratty`> COME ON BRAZIL!!
<Ratty`> COME ON BRAZIL!!
<Ratty`> COME ON BRAZIL!!
<Ratty`> COME ON BRAZIL!!
* ToRMeNTeD comes on brazil
<Ratty`> ergh
<Ratty`> it's all sticky
<ToRMeNTeD> you told me to

#15603
*** treker has joined #ircop
<treker> what is this channel for?
<_zenon> sex channel treker
<treker> AH, I see...
<treker> well then by all means, go ahead, have fun...i'll just go run some errands.

#15443
<ZondrZout> "you"
<teig> you what?
<Karyon> Euhm? just "you"
<ZondrZout> Yes, you
<teig> I'd what you?
<teig> I'd wad you... is that a good thing?
<Karyon> Yes, wadding is our special treat
<ZondrZout> Not many people get wadded by us
<Karyon> nobody yet, actually
<ZondrZout> No, we've never done it before now I think of it
<Karyon> in fact i havent even created tha alias yet...
<Karyon> Cuz we only just invented it
<ZondrZout> I've actually never ever heard of it before !

#35959
*** Join: Garf_LT
<Garf_LT> godddamit creative
<Garf_LT> IS IT SO HARD TO REMEMBER VOLUME SETTINGS
<Garf_LT> BLOWING A USERS EARS OUT COULD END UP IN AN EXPENSIVE LAWSUIT SOMEDAY
<Garf_LT> MORE EXPENSIVE THAN HIRING COMPETENT PROGRAMMERS

#24993
<secracy> what would be the correct way to be able to have !! in my php script ?
<sZombie> secracy: what?
<secracy> my two exclimation marks arent showing up on my form
<sZombie> secracy: you need to do a double-back-flip-exclamation-mark-escape

#13996
<killah667> shit i left my jacket in another channel!!
<madlib> wich one!?
<killah667> #lobby

#16633
<eller> i ate sushi today
<eller> i hoped that it would cure my hangover
<eller> but i just puked it up
<motardo> not good
<eller> raw fish is even more disgusting when it comes out of your mouth...
<eller> it swims in the toilet on its own.

#2613
<kyourek> KEEEEEEEEEEEEEIIIIIIIIAAAAAAAAAAAAAEEEEEEEEEE!!
<DrWoody> ... What?
<kyourek> Just practicing my karate.

#269
n e r d b 5: i smell a burning smell
n e r d b 5: maybe its my pc
n e r d b 5: oh wait, ewww, its the cat pooping

#4497
<rizen> uptime length is the geek dick

#102712
[linux]    hey i have a question
[helf]     ok
[linux]    i recently installed ubuntu on my laptop
[linux]    and it works very good
[linux]    the only problem is that i can not boot into windows anymore
[helf]     uhoh

#35249
<rocket> any idea what can cause really horrible disk performance in windows?
<gfjgfjgfj> windows
<Stonefish> windows?
<dooky> rocket: windows
<Igneous> •rocket• WINDOWS?
<Igneous> lmao
<dooky> lmfao!
Comment: #futuremark

#235397
<Smidge204> Asperger's syndrome is most commonly contracted by reading the Wikipedia article on Asperger's syndrome.

#4123
<HA[OffDay]Dima> one thing i learned though, never let my gf play GTA3, cause afterward she was tryin to play it IRL
<HA[OffDay]Dima> i thought i was gonna die on the way home

#19204
<@vaL_> damn... this cute girl came home woohoo
<@patsfan12> home?
<@patsfan12> your home?
<@patsfan12> neighbor?
<@vaL_> yeah
<@vaL_> nah, she was my cousin :(

#299049
<Xagor> mexico legalized drugs for personal use
<Xagor> time for them to be on the receiving end of illegal immigration =P

#50571
<GenericLoser> We recieved our Red Ribbon Week wristbands yesterday.
<GenericLoser> (Red Ribbon Week has long past.)
<GenericLoser> Our instructor said, "You should probably wear these anyway."
<GenericLoser> Making a joke, I replied, "Yeah, just because Red Ribbon Weeks is over, that doesn't mean you can start doing drugs again."
<GenericLoser> And our instructor replies, very serious, "Yeah, my goal is to stay off for a month."

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