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#7137
<Prior_Tuck> I got a guy busted during my year at eaton. he had 6 gigs of "illegal" pron, as wel as 15 gigs of legal pron. I turned his PC to my boss..where my boss called the police.
<CrashCat> so did he have the pr0n put into two directories, 'legal' and 'illegal'? :P
<Prior_Tuck> yes he did actually
<Prior_Tuck> he had his word docs folder and his powerpoint folder

#25176
<+Normandy> How poor is this.
<+Normandy> that exercise bike I've been lookin forward to start building my leg muscles for the summer finally arrived today
<+Normandy> yet I'm carryin it upstairs and twat it against my knee, and now my uncle who is a doctor says i cant exert any pressure on it for 2 bloody months

#28806
<tuls> i'll never tell
<LaLaLand> slut
<LaLaLand> you're name is slut spelled backwards
* LaLaLand is soo fucking slow
<tuls> you are name is slut spelled backwards

#50220
<Foicite>  Nothing brightens your day like Japanese girls gasping and moaning as they laud your sexual prowess.

#5490
<theForger> it's kind of odd how a lot of planets in star trek have spaceships and transporters, and yet they still live in huts and clay houses

#58364
* Irishblood is now known as talkin_to_cops
<talkin_to_cops> be back in a very long time

#1698
<Sharkey> I think it's time I did a major redesign.
<MightyQuinn> you mean change the background to a different gaudy stripe pattern?

#27935
<@Phobius> [d20]Gau: Name of channel please.
<+[d20]Gau> Clan:  Covert Underground Neutralization Team  #CUNT
<@Phobius> [d20]Gau: Sorry but thats an unacceptable channel name.
<+[d20]Gau> ?  Is it too short?
<@Phobius> [d20]Gau: No its the word "cunt"
<+[d20]Gau> "cunt"? Ohhhh goodness That's another word for a woman's vagina, isn't it
<+[d20]Gau> How about The War Against Terrorism? #twat
<@Phobius> !#twat reg [d20]Gau

#27415
<Gryffon> Just how old do you think I am Quake?
<QuaKe> Gryffon, do you really want me to answer that?
<Gryffon> yeah
<QuaKe> Fine, 13.
<Gryffon> well, your off by about 9 years
<QuaKe> 4?

#7497
<mild7> its always real nice when you step out of bed and step into wetness

#355
<Rapture> I wasn't naked! I had a sock on!

#21682
<dbl-d> tinkerbel hates me today :)
<b> I think she's hating everyone today
<schmolli> hate her back
<b> Eh, I find it irritates people who hate me more if I'm obsessively friendly back to them.
<schmolli> I would think that it would irritate them more if you slashed their tires and burned down their house
<b> you may have a point

#37896
<TrafficCone> So I'm talking to my friend the day after I nailed his older sister in the bathroom ofthe local movie theater
<TrafficCone> and he starts going off about some time i made a total ass of my self in front of some girl i liked in high school when i was drunk
<FKNPWNED> Go on...
<TrafficCone> and there's a freaking platoon of people i don't want to hear this shit around, so i pipe up and say,
<TrafficCone> "Hey dude, your sister likes it when I slap her in the face with my Dick"
<TrafficCone> The next thing I know, I'm in the emergency room. The bastard knocked me out with a chair leg.
Comment: 0wn3d

#29886
<Garf> Did you know, Alt+Z makes your text go backwards in most IRC clients?
<Garf> .ereh ti did I ?eeS
* Parts: Bamral (B1@xiph-IALHNG.ne.client2.attbi.com)
* Parts: Benjamin_L (~BenjaminL@xiph-IEIAFM.dip.t-dialin.net)
* Parts: menno (menno@cal16a041.student.utwente.nl)
* Parts: TheLink (TheLink@p213.54.189.36.tisdip.tiscali.de)

#308806
<powersurge> god dammit
<powersurge> I go to dairy queen so often that google is asking me to set it as my work
<powersurge> stop judging me, google

#8423
<SuperGayAllah> ok, who is the hairiest girl in here?
<Phuser> you are dude

#35233
<J3anyus> sweet jesus i need to get motivated to finish up this semester.  there's only 3 weeks left and i just can't get the motivation to go to class or do homework or anything :(
<GeechyAFK> Con someone into giving you a blowjob for every passing grade you receive
<J3anyus> brb, calling mom

#111110
<wishes-> i always worry when my banks captcha has 4 letters/digits
<wishes-> and they're 'pray'

#298704
Primus521: hey dude the funniest thing happened to me today
Primus521: im at walmart and this chick is buying a box of tampons and they are missing the upc and wont ring up
Primus521: so the cashier tells his buddy to get a price check on tampax
Primus521: the dude looks at him and says, "the kind u push in, or the kind you hammer in?"
Primus521: lol
Primus521: turns out he misheard him
Primus521: he thought he said thumbtacs

#29498
<+FuelDizzle> i wish i was a midget i'd dress up as a leperchaun

#310821
<stereo_> y'all have some daddy issues
<clockwrok> nothing could be father from the truth
Comment: #geekissues irc.efnet.net

#32755
<mrWoot> porn = getting old

#309398
< BronzeEagle> I just found a floppy disk in my desk that says "women = evil"
< Frostypants> :D
< o11c> you still have a floppy drive, and were patient enough to put it in?
< BronzeEagle> Negative and negative
< o11c> then how did you know what it says?
< BronzeEagle> It's written on the label
* o11c forgets sometimes that there is a physical layer

#59427
<adam> I need to work on my attention span
<adam> I went to find something to eat
<adam> ended up shaving

#54372
< zid`> the faster you go the slower time is
< zid`> you lose like 20 ns flying supersonic to america
< zid`> something like that
<+WhiteWolf> 20ns!??!
< syc> no you don't.
< syc> you lose 4 hours on the tarmac.
< syc> 2 hours in security.

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