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#22081
<Juggs> ahaha the funniest shit is when i took 3 e's at once at a lan
<Juggs> and as far as i was concerned i could slow down time
#294926
<Metal_Wol> WTF is a l33t h4x0r anyway?
<Metal_Wol> That hurt my head just to fucking TYPE that.
<Momaw> Don't type with your head?
#310308
<@swight> Ikea Bags Stuffed With Skeletons Found in Sweden
<@swight> good luck putting them back together
#42253
<+turkey> all i do these days is stick my penis in my vcr, hoping that it'll give birth to a dvd player.
Comment: #maddox
#4036
<Tragician> MOTHER...FUCKING...FIREWALL!
<mightyflo> that's a horrible mental image
#33726
<Opius>photoshops being screwy
<dal>in what way
<Opius>the stroke tool thingy is being a bitch
<Opius>it lags fro some reason
<Opius>*for
* p4 has joined #hynes
<Opius>So i stroke and stroke and stroke, and it does nothing
<Opius>then all of a sudden it goes nuts and puts white shit all over my work
<p4>i wont ask
Comment: www.opius.tk
#10958
(morganj): 0 is false and 1 is true, correct?
(alec_eso): 1, morganj
(morganj): bastard.
#35954
06:18 <Lanfear> yesterday, I was stroaking a cat that laid on a friend's lap..
and, well. I was scratching the cat's tummy and stuff, when I
suddenly became aware of that it was a bit too close to the guy's
crotch
#15634
<drunkers> do you know who i am?
<vinnieT> nope
<drunkers> i could rip your eyes out and stick them in your knee and make your knee read a book
<vinnieT> i dont read
#9192
<les_savy_fav> all i know is mr.Ed was really a mr, because he went on to have a distinguished career as a porno actor in denmark
#83676
<Ahabman> When I was at purdue, I was wearing my uniform to go to a lecture I was giving.
<Ahabman> Some girl called me a "baby killer"
<Ahabman> I stopped and said "lady, I'm in the Coast Guard. I don't kill babies. I kill baby seals."
#1658
<bigPIMP> are you a virgin?
<kink> yes
<kink> giving it up to a non-linux using chick is like giving it up to a man, just wrong
#9100
* Ryo curses his swiss-cheese memory
* Grue curses his fondue memory. It's all melty and stuff. o_o;
#53901
<galisus> I think I realized I'd never touch Linux again when I was like.. "Holy shit I never have to deal with X11 EVER again.."
<galisus> It was like my first blowjob all over again.
<galisus> Good times.
#29473
<xpro> sweet, just found 13$ in some dirty pants
<pimp> who was wearing them?
#44923
<CAPS-LOCK> And now for some good news... Remember that HD I was whining about? I managed to get the drive up and running long enough to get the data off of it.
<CAPS-LOCK> I did so by stuffing paperclips down the hollow stubs of the power pins, removing a power connector block and exposing the wires, and using alligator clips to connect the power wires to the ends of the paperclips
<CAPS-LOCK> \o/
<Pliong> that's impressively ghetto
#1546
(timmo) the average testicle is the size of a walnut.
[maff] the average walnut tastes better than the average testicle
#27906
<chabo> have you guys ever noticed that quite a few of the quotes on bash.org deal with people who go on IRC and tell everyone about it when something major happens, rather than do what they should, which is usually go to the hospital?
#131422
<lolage> Holy shit. Most epic idea ever.
<lolage> In the history of mankind.
<lolage> A rocket-coffin.
<lolage> You get put in standing upward. Door gets closed and you get launched into the sky
<lolage> with a parachute attached to your body
<lolage> the door blows in mid air
<lolage> parachute autodeploys
<lolage> you float, dead; down into someones garden
<oohal> lolage, you've got issues
<lolage> Oh man. I'd better get started on the blue prints.
#1776
<cait-sith> being in love
<R0y> i wish
<R0y> it's all just confusing emotion
<R0y> one minute you think you love her, the next minute you're on yahoo masturbating with girls in the united states
#7679
<[BoB]spencer> LOL who has seen the capture the sperm game?
<Sharp|DoD> i play it every day with my sock
<Sharp|DoD> woops
#6371
*** Quits: Jenn|fer (If you are reading this, you wasted 3 seconds of your life.)
<GE> actually, it only took me about 1.5 seconds to read
<File13> if i only wasted 3 seconds of my life, i'd be happy. but according to the timer on mIRC, i have 2074 hours on this install so far.
#50250
<@Myke> Two radio antennae on a roof decided to get married
<@Myke> the ceremony wasn't much
<@Myke> but the reception was excellent.
#24627
<brad> i was hoping for a friendly windows way, but i guess i'll look at that
<brad> ...sadly
<brad> ...with puppy dog eyes
<obscurity> Do you plan to give them back to the puppy afterwards?
<brad> hell no
<blue> i spy, with my little eye.. eye pie!
<brad> he can come and take 'em from me
<brad> if he's puppy enough
#350
<chisoxiest> is it just me... or does eveyone think that quadrapelegics are greedy?
<chisoxiest> "i can't reach that"
<chisoxiest> "i'm not tall enough"
<chisoxiest> i mean c'mon now