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#50344
<che> there's a programmer's union?
<Wintermute> yes
<Wintermute> Local 100100101110101010010

#4008
<evil-guru> if the Bible says Pi equals 3, the Pi must equal 3
<j-la> Thou shalt not reckon in decimals.

#306048
<Man18> friends dog had to be put down today
<Man18> i told him damn man thats ruff in a text message
<Man18> he deleted me on facebook
Comment: #gbatemp.net

#296074
<+MurderMachine> Are the ghosts of black people white? Don't interpret that as racist, I've just never seen a black ghost in a movie or anything.

#20435
<tudda> Man you guys are nerds.
<tudda> Im outta here, im going to go watch star wars.

#13469
<Khalal> I never did understand that quote NG
<NintendoGuru> Khalal: That's because you haven't seen a picture of Andrew Vestal
<Khalal> What does he look like?
<NintendoGuru> Think Richard Simmons french kissing and electrical outlet

#5660
<Sys> I hate maths.  What do you reckon they'll do if I fail it?
<0ut_Lore> you repeat it.  fail it AGAIN, and you face the exclusion board.  guess what they do?  ;P
<Sys> Exclude you from having to do it a third time? :D

#13077
corner (19:08:21): how tall is a standard guillotine?
Andrick (19:08:33): This still concerns you?
corner (19:08:39): yeah, I really want to build one
corner (19:08:47): I have short ceilings
corner (19:08:51): I wanna make sure I can keep it in my apt
Andrick (19:09:00): I have to admit that I never have committed that number to memory.
Andrick (19:09:06): But I can tell you they are *tall*.
corner (19:09:15): maybe I can make a kid's version?
Andrick (19:09:30): That is probably a wonderfully poor choice of words.

#302272
<Legion|work> hm
<Legion|work> so the b3ta newsletter describes a theory that all film titles are funnier if you substitute one of the words with "sausage" or "sausages"
<Legion|work> I submit for your consideration "Sausage in 60 Seconds" and "The Green Sausage"
<Mac^Work> Terminator 2: Sausage Day
<Legion|work> "Sausages on a Plane"
<Niyx> Harry Potter and the Philosopher's sausage
<Mac^Work> Alice in Sausageland gives a whole new outlook on teh film...
<Legion|work> PMSL
<Legion|work> "The Lion, the Witch and the Sausage"?
<Legion|work> (I'd prefer "The Witch, the Wardrobe and the Sausage" but I think that's cheating)
<^RaK^> The Sausage in the Willows ?
<Legion|work> A Beautiful Sausage
<Mac^Work> How to train your sausage
<Legion|work> Buffalo Sausages
<Legion|work> (or alternatively Sausage Soldiers, which is perhaps even better)
<Mac^Work> Hot Tub Sausage Machine
<Legion|work> Sausage for Private Ryan
<Niyx> Sausage Club
<Legion|work> Sausage at Tiffany's?
<Mac^Work> Furry sausage
<Niyx> There's something about sausage
<Legion|work> Iron Sausage / Sausage Man
<Niyx> The men who stare at sausages
<Legion|work> WINNER!

#40400
<Entro-P> sometimes karma comes back *way* too fast, i heard the wind howling outside and the rain whipping against my window, then heard a clatter down the street and someone shouting as they chsed whatever they'd dropped ... i laughed to myself, thinking haha it sure is windy ... then i remembered i still had laundry hanging on the line :(
Comment: irc.freenode.net #nethack

#304777
<coxy> Benoit B. Mandelbrot died
<coxy> what did the B. stand for?
<coxy> Benoit B. Mandelbrot
<spartan> thank god he wasn't murdered...
<spartan> would have taken forever to draw the chalk outline

#50267
<Klassh> strange, my left hand is warm, but my right hand is cold..
<killjoy> take left hand out of pants.
<killjoy> put right hand in pants.

#295382
<Fualkner> You know, Carry on Wayward Son is one huge innuendo.
<Fualkner> "Carry on wayward son / there'll be peace when you are done"
<Fualkner> "Carry on, nothing equals the splendor"
<Fualkner> Kansas is apparently made up of chronic masturbators
<Pingly> Stop.
<Pingly> STOP.
<jabbers> You just fucking ruined that song for me.

#6419
<extremist> strep?
<extremist> that thing where girls take their clothes off?

#26212
<tak08810> Frostlion, that is the porrest splelling Iv'e ever seen
<Frostlion> no it'sn't
<tak08810> err, poorest, I've, spelling

#35726
<AaD-Marine> YAY
<AaD-Marine> its the 1 year anniversery of my BIOS
<AaD-Marine> it just became 1 year old
<AaD-Marine> happy birth day to you MV85010A.86A.0069.P25
<AaD-Marine> HAPPPY BIRTHDAY

#3403
* IZS logs in and delets all potential child porn
<IZS> rm -rf /

#6983
<unlord> you are now talking to a man who owns a piece of furniture for the express purpose of sleeping on it
<Animix> oooooooooooh
<Animix> can I have your autograph

#625
<Ash> We hardly ever do crack. Sometimes barely once a week.

#54648
<TnT> In primary school, I carved up my dictionary so it could fit a gameboy
<TnT> and I would sneak in a few Tetris games during class.
<Avatar> <TnT>: are you shitting me?
<Avatar> you carved up a dictionary to fit a gameboy?
<TnT> Yep
<Avatar> you are the craziest man alive.
<TnT> I was soooo hoping someone else in the class would do the same
<TnT> so we could multiplayer Tetris
<TnT> and look like we're reading the dictionary
<TnT> but alas
<TnT> no one was game enough :(

#60175
<NIM^Outithj> I parked the car and turned to her, by the time I turned my head her shirt was already half off
<NIM^Outithj> And she was like Touch my breast
<NIM^Outithj> I was like what?
<NIM^Outithj> She was like Touch my tits
<NIM^Outithj> so I started the car and drove her home
<Malawar> ...
<[JS]-nowhere> well that was anti-climatic
<NIM^Outithj> Once I started driving home she started on this complex like 'WTF, IS THERE SOMETHING WRONG WITH ME? IS THERE SOMETHING WRONG WITH MY TITS? OMG THERES SOMETHING WRONG WITH ME ISN'T THERE... ETC...'
<NIM^Outithj> So to shut her up, I reached over and grabbed one, and sweezed it twice, and on each squeeze I made the hook sound skeeter from that cartoon doug used to make
<NIM^Outithj> then put both hands back on the wheel like nothing had just happened :p
Comment: #empiresmod / gamesurge

#58806
<~knuck> Faptime.
<~knuck> I came. (20mins 15secs)
<~knuck> knuck's fap count for 2006: 137 times. Last came 41secs ago. Total faptime: 2days 3hrs 17mins 53secs. Average faptime: 22mins 28secs. 1.199546 faps/day.
<Zem> sometimes I hate my capacity for visual speculation

#33213
*** Signoff: disp (Killed (NickServ (Ghost: disposal!disp@syru229-149.syr.edu)))
*** disp (disp@syru229-149.syr.edu) has joined channel #fark
<disp> i am fucking stupid
<disp> from my experience
<goatasaur> took you long enough
<disp> it was on auto reconnect
<disp> i did it manually
<disp> while it was reconnecting
<disp> and then i sat on the server
<disp> thinking i was in the channel
<goatasaur> no, i mean it took you long enough to figure out you're fucking stupid
Comment: #fark on irvingnet.net

#32294
<Travisimo> I always thought Pooh and Piglet were always happy because they weren't wearing pants.

#9131
<FairLighT> we'd have to do something incredibly crazy to distract the wal-mart staff
<V3nOm> lol yeah go take a shit in the front garden

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