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#39802
<jo> fiendish....
<jo> u have never been a pain in my ass
<jo> just so ya know
<Telnus> cuz his weenie's too small to be a pain
* Telnus rimshot!
<jo> how do u know?
<Telnus> THIS CONVERSATION IS OVER
#311375
<DrMcCoy> $ mv clone2728 droid2727
<-- clone2728 has quit (Ping timeout: 255 seconds)
<DrMcCoy> Well, that's not quite what I wanted :P
--> droid2727 has joined #xoreos
<Farmboy0> DrMcCoy: you certainly have a way with people ^^
#63069
<Hephesus> I think the baby has a fever...
<Trinexx> a fever on a baby is a clear sign of demonic possession, you must remove the heart with a dog skull, then piss inside an empty glass and drink it. Burn the heart. Smear the ashes on your penis. Make hot steamy love to an asian boy.
<Trinexx> be sure to smear molten sugar on the baby's legs and throw it in an antbed once you're done
<Hephesus> or, you know, give him a bath and some medicine...
<Trinexx> NO! DO NOT LET THE DEMON TOUCH WATER!
<Hephesus> what if I bathe him in holy water?
<Trinexx> possibly, as long as the heart has already been removed
#9347
[02:18:04] s7ank: i want to be one of those guys that types
"s/j&jd//.^$ueu*///djsls/sm."
and it's a perl script that turns dog crap into gold.
#262694
<@terminal> dell guy is here replacing some hardware in a server
<@terminal> dude fucking smacks his head in to the power button of another server and takes it down
#2538
<Bizzy> say Æ Ø Y
<DAL9000> Æ Ø Y
<DAL9000> easy to say
<DAL9000> f00
<DAL9000> ¸ß
<DAL9000> say that.
<Bizzy> ¸ß
<DAL9000> õ þ
<DAL9000> now that
<Bizzy> õ þ
<DAL9000> now say this:
<DAL9000> ß|ZZ¥ |§ ª е/\/\ߪ§§
<Bizzy> ß|ZZ¥ |§ ª е/\/\ߪ§§
<DAL9000> bahahaha
<Bizzy> what?
<Bizzy> damnit
#299720
<+anosou> You're like the best man around
<+anosou> If there was a god of some kind, he'd be proud to have made you
<+anosou> If internet was full of women (which it is not) they would sleep with you
<+anosou> If zircon says something is S-tier, you say it isn't
<+anosou> If you were black, the southeners would still like you
<+anosou> If you moved to Japan, you'd become tentacle pope of the world
Comment: #ocremix
#311335
< danl> being lazy and running everything as root is so much easier
< danl> lol
< danl> damn it
< danl> I screwed up my script and lost a years worth of access logs
#307373
< kn0where> a fox is like a cat and a dog rolled into one
< auxchar> And when you light it on fire, you get a web browser, too.
#36909
<Duzzy> today at work, i was cutting gras outside the local school.. and then a chick came up to me.. kissed me, squeezed my balls, gave me a note and the she ran of.. and i was like wtf?!? when I got my mind gathered I looked at the note and there was a phone number.. I should send an sms to it, and that was when I realized the bitch had stolen my cellphone =(
#12746
<ArtyMorty> we kill all the jehovah's witnesses once and for all, either we get some
peace and quiet or we get hit by lightning from a clear sky
#307328
<Xynth> Seriously, who starts their name with an X? How do you even pronounce that?
#309782
<@Taryn> some people apparently think that taxes are EVIL!!!! and that the ideal rate is 0%
<@Taryn> these people have never played SimCity
<@Taryn> (seriously, SimCity was what helped me understand why taxes exist)
<@NWH> <Fox News> Will Wright is a filthy godless liberal!
<@Taryn> lol
<@Treeki> there should be a libertarian SimCity
<@Treeki> it would be exactly like regular SimCity, but all the buttons would be disabled
<@Treeki> except for zooming and moving around
#31198
<dudeXIII> you guys hear about that sniper in washington?
<dudeXIII> camping bitch D:
#32813
<Footle> I have a beautiful vision. It involves the authors of typhoon, a wooden stake, some rope, some napalm, lots of kindling, and a flaming torch
#303386
<jer> on a side note, love the new iphone headset -- they don't tangle as easily
<jer> s/headset/earbuds\/whatever/
<erica> earbuds == evil evil evil
<jer> erica, three evils? thought just two?
<erica> Left ear, right, sinuses
<atomicbird> if the earbuds hurt your sinuses, you're probably using them wrong
#18162
Wangtangs2 <AUTO-REPLY> : taking a dump ;) >:o PUSH!!!
PRoGRaMMeRQ: I'm taking a screenshot of that and pasting that on my front website
#10883
<jorm> fuck freedom. freedom is for weenies.
<jorm> COOL people want to be oppressed.
#1659
<ix> man that offer for cash perked you right up
<vermifuge> i didnt even get to the most appealing part
<vermifuge> there will be a bucket of fried chicken here for your consumption
<goatb0y> well that fucking settles it
<goatb0y> any collared greens by chance?
<vermifuge> dude there could be
#60641
<shardz> my friend wrote a "compressor" in perl yesterday
<shardz> but instead of compressing the file, it just deletes it and replaces it with an empty file and sends the message "Oops! Compression failed!"
Comment: irc.esper.net #ednos
#70385
oompaloompaboy89: i got into a fight wit a 5 year old
Kuro Desir: o_O
Kuro Desir: OVER WHAT!?
oompaloompaboy89: who is better batman or superman
oompaloompaboy89: i was wearing a batman shirt and this kid wad wearing a superman shirt
oompaloompaboy89: and he points at mine and says "superman is better"
oompaloompaboy89: so i said fuck off and of course since hes 5 he dousnt know what fuck off means
oompaloompaboy89: so we start argueing and it ends with both of us making faces at each other
#105650
<Hooden-Hen> i wanna see muse again
<Hooden-Hen> the fuck is she
<rmuser> college
<Hooden-Hen> she should really come online
<Hooden-Hen> to talk to me
<rmuser> she's a FAT WHORE with DOZENS OF PIERCINGS
<rmuser> not that there's anything wrong with that
<Hooden-Hen> looks are unimportant to me
<Hooden-Hen> we connect on a spiritual level
<rmuser> we discuss ass lube
#111830
<tuxick> what annoys me a lot is idiot media crying "oil price up!! 80 dollars now!" instead of "dollar down! 1/80th barrel now!"
#56678
* Quietus is now known as BruceLee
<BruceLee> Now someone change to JackieChan so we can have a karate match.
<KamiKaziGames> ...k
* KamiKaziGames is now known as JackieChan
* JackieChan has quit IRC (Killed (NickServ (GHOST command used by BruceLee)))
<BruceLee> K/O
#8359
<Tantalus|RO> No one can resist hot monkey sex
<Tovart> Except hot monkey females with a headache.