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#160001
[while uploading videos to YouTube]
<urbex> took over two hours?
<myself> yep. Woohoo, comcast?
<myself> well, it failed the first time, got a "connection timed out" after about 80% of it was up...
<myself> so I had to start again, because 1986 called and took their zmodem crash recovery protocol back
#70701
<rm-rf> !8 die of starvation or eat lunch
<Willow> rm-rf: die of starvation
<rm-rf> damn
#302144
<dangerousgeom> wow, your forehead has a language?
<dangerousgeom> that's impressive
<sos> every forehead has a language, just try using it for tying stuff
<sos> typing*
<dangerousgeom> v njm v
<dangerousgeom> mine seems to have a speech impediment
#14738
<tortoise> what should i name my turtles?
<archon> name one kurt, and one courtney, and blow one's head off with a shotgun
#11194
*** SpeedySavant is now known as Savant
<Shadow|AFK> faster than a speeding bullet!
<Shadow|AFK> more powerful than a locomotive!
*** Savant (somewhere@385a42df.18d12617.ed.shawcable.net) Quit (Ping timeout)
<Baralu> Ironic :)
<Shadow|AFK> alright a slow locomotive
#4237
<Geothermal> too many kitties in my life
<Kashan> masturbate more
<Geothermal> that's your solution to everything damn it
<Geothermal> "Just keep whackin' Geo!"
<Geothermal> well I'm tired of that kinda attitude
#52939
<Luncheon> i like my women how i like my whiskey... 12 years old and from scotland
#1107
* MadHatter is back from: Rebooting!
<^enex^> do you feel refreshed
#7339
<NeSSa`> yeah but he isnt fucking him?
<[ben]> not to my knowledge...jason was walkin a little funny tonight though
#24627
<brad> i was hoping for a friendly windows way, but i guess i'll look at that
<brad> ...sadly
<brad> ...with puppy dog eyes
<obscurity> Do you plan to give them back to the puppy afterwards?
<brad> hell no
<blue> i spy, with my little eye.. eye pie!
<brad> he can come and take 'em from me
<brad> if he's puppy enough
#37968
<Norgus> I bought cheapy headphones and they sound like some sailor stuck his dick in my ear.
#71440
<A_SN> lol wtf, from the english "Earth" article on Wikipedia
<A_SN> "It is the largest planet in the world."
Comment: http://en.wikipedia.org/w/index.php?title=Earth&oldid=85281232
#558
<@xvize> xwin is like an os
#311162
<VesicantDerp> Is there a name for selling your blood plasma, then using that money to get super fucked up on a normal amount of booze while you're low on blood?
<SpaceMarine> no
<SpaceMarine> but there really should be
#16994
<Spankle> What the fuck is a furniture cover?
<Al> Spankle: a sheet you put over chairs and shit to stop dust or dirt getting on them
<Al> like a foreskin for your sofa.
<Jre-La> And retracts when guests come by
#29081
<karynn> someone is attempting to eat my arm
<lisa> that's my friend Mister Flesh Eating Bacteria!
<lisa> He's a bit misunderstood. :(
#11066
InVerSeX: I scanned my penis in a flatbed scanner once.
The Spunn: did it hurt?
InVerSeX: No, I didn't close the lid.
InVerSeX: It was only a 14" scanner.
The Spunn: Ah, so you couldn't scan the whole thing.
InVerSeX: Exactly.
The Spunn: I had to fold mine in half to fit it all on the 14" scanner, that's the part that hurt the most.
InVerSeX: Well, I scanned mine limp and then used photoshop to get a stiffy.
#29504
<splice> davis took a swing at arnold's accent, said the governor should be able to pronounce "california" correctly.. guess he forgot about the population completely
#539
<BobDole> i'm not the real bob dole
<BobDole> but.. i'm just on this nick
<T`karthon> ohh
<Nija_work> had me fooled
<T`karthon> thanks for clearing that up for us
#304862
<FuegoFish> Natural Weapon basically has the following options: imitating an Arcane spell, or being a built-in Martial weapon
<FuegoFish> which means that yes you could have gunhands if you wanted
<FuegoFish> or a crossbow for a dick
Comment: #partyhard, irc.synirc.net
#300574
<Sarig> Now, my evil plan to conquer earth is nearly completed
<Sarig> No wait
<Sarig> It was just a file transfer
#19791
<Vyse`work> FUCK SNAKE
<Vyse`work> thats nice as FUCK!
<Vyse`work> dude
<Vyse`work> ill show my boss ASAP
<Vyse`work> when he comes in
<Vyse`work> DUDE SNAKE
<Vyse`work> fucking move here for a job =)
<Vyse`work> my boss would so fucking fire the chick who does it now
<Vyse`work> and hire you
<Vyse`work> look at the website she is working on
<Vyse`work> dude
<Vyse`work> snake isn't here
<Vyse`work> im talking to no one
<Vyse`work> FUCK
#301807
<SMD>i am gonna retire now
<SMD>gotta read some more lovecraft
<Her>lovecraft??
<SMD>h.p. lovecraft
<SMD>he was a scifi horror writer of 1920 or so
<Her>i thought it was some romantic version of warcraft
#9474
<Undine> So he dumped her, "Nothing about sex should remind you of a cauliflower"
#16607
<`Tenshi> ass munch.
<ibutsu> yes, I do on occaision