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#30770
(@Clitos) hungry for weiners?
(@tyree) fuck i could take a hot dog or two
(@Clitos) in the ass?
(@tyree) no
(@tyree) i like to swallow
#6611
<@meiso> he was trying to secure his server and made the root filesystem un-writeable
#74366
mistah_j: most fat people are like IT'S MY METABOLISM
mistah_j: it's like no shit it's your metabolism
mistah_j: it can't burn 8000 calories a day you fat fucks
Comment: #rohmacking on espernet
#50168
<Montag> "Ubuntu" is an ancient African word, meaning "I can't configure Slackware".
Comment: Thats what Ubuntu means...
#34830
<RHX> Why do people say Shakespeare was so great?
<RHX> His plays just had the same crap in them all the time like
<RHX> "the sky is blue" "aye, tis" "wouldst thou do me the honour of a duel"
<RHX> "most certainly, squire"
<RHX> *clanketh clanketh clanketh*
<RHX> "why, thou hath slain me" "indeed I have"
<RHX> *dies*
#295040
(@craig): i was trying to reproduce an error
(~Terry): be sure not to use a condom then
#40333
<+HauntedUnix> Heard there's been an open-source explosion in Florida...
<+Nimbus> Oh?
<+HauntedUnix> Well no one there has Windows anymore..
#296825
Oddlot: I guess I might have to re-install windows.
FuzzyPlushroom: Whose is it?
Oddlot: Joannas.
Oddlot: My cousins friends friend.
FuzzyPlushroom: she's paying you, then? :P
Oddlot: If she is, in weed.
Oddlot: Either that, or a bj, whichever works.
FuzzyPlushroom: Congratulations. You're officially a goddamn stoner.
Oddlot: Yeah.
Oddlot: I figured that much out.
#4852
<ryo-ohki> and it would be an understatement to say I AM FUCKING BAKED OUT OF MY MIND
<DCBastard> lol - what else is new?
<DCBastard> one day you should come into the channel and go "WOW - I AM TOTALLY FUCKING STRAIGHT" - we'd all be like "holy shit! that is amazing!"
#51650
<hylix> Syntacs, I know where you live.
<Syntacs> Big deal, I've known that for years.
<hylix> i've sent a team of magical sheep to mutton bomb your house
<Syntacs> And they were delicious.
<hylix> you baa-stard.
#3874
<Hostile> And now that i think of it, the west coast should be all renamed to the wastelands
<Scofco> It should be renamed to the east coast
<Scofco> then we would have 2 east coasts
<Scofco> it would rid gang violence
<Scofco> end the east coast / west coast struggle
<Scofco> with a simple name change
<Scofco> I AM THE SMARTEST MAN ALIVE
<Hostile> AGREED
#295242
<range> duck. Someone stole my d key and replaced it with d.
#49032
<@feem> i had someone claim to me the other day that pi was the longest irrational number in existence
<@feem> and someone else said no e was
<@feem> and i stared at them
#20858
<nutrasweetie> lol my brother is such a little creep
<nutrasweetie> hes on the phone w/his friend
<nutrasweetie> and he goes to me "can i go online"
<nutrasweetie> me: "no, you're on the phone"
<nutrasweetie> "well, my friend wants to tell me something, and i called him and the lines busy"
<nutrasweetie> me: "NO"
<nutrasweetie> john goes back to the phone "damn, she wont let me on to talk to you"
#3920
<djLiKu> tell her to give me a blueprint of her vagina
<blazemore> wtf are you gonna do with a blueprint
<blazemore> construct your own vagina?
<djLiKu> yes
<djLiKu> it's like ocean's 11
<djLiKu> i'm gonna plan out first with a demo
#16563
<Molochai> i wish my g/fwould take a notion and get horny...:P
#35474
<+fleet> morning
<+ke1th> morning honey.
<+fleet> aww sweetie, its been ages since you said that
<+ke1th> for this convo to go on anymore.. we'd just sound really gay.
<+fleet> well, according to some other deviants, they're already under the impression I am gay
<+dxd> fleets not gay? :o
<+fleet> yes, unfortunately, I am as straight as a ruler
<+dxd> :<
<+ke1th> one of those plastic ones that bend?
<+fleet> all the way round baby
#50180
<DangerousCurves> man
<DangerousCurves> now i wanna go into a store
<DangerousCurves> and buy a pregnancy test
<DangerousCurves> then come back in 5 mins and buy some wire coathangers
#7908
<@dum|work> he's actually quite likeable in RL
<@dum|work> its just when he gets behind an irc session he becomes Bitter-man
<@dum|work> a strange visitor from another planet, zapping the denizens of IRC with his Bittero rays
<@acme> he's got a Bitter-man cape and tights and everything
<@dum|work> the tights are just a recreational thing
#18271
<Shrapnull> It's not how the boat floats, or the size of the mast, but the motion of the ocean
<Aduro> lol
<Tiffy> haha
<cryptonix> just hope your seamen don't have scurvey :D
#53949
<Rep> What do I say to my Mum when she discovers I bombed 26 days of meds in six fucking hours?
<kdogground2> Time flys when your having fun.
Comment: Yay for medication.
#17168
<Fishfood> HAHAH
<Fishfood> BT ARGUING WITH AOL
<Fishfood> ITS LIKE BLIND FIGHTING THE BLIND!
<Funk> WITH THE RETARDED COMMENTATING
#3891
(|Chris) it's the gift that keeps on giving
(Amanda`) Herpes?
#993
serluny: how long did it took u to learn c?
ReDPriest:4.5 minutes
serluny:how did u do that?
ReDPriest:i downloaded it into my brain..i got a program to do
that
serluny:what program
ReDPriest:download shit into your brain v3.1
serluny:how do i download it?
ReDPriest: go to www.downloadable-shit-for-your-brain.com
serluny:i cant download it something is wrong
#297854
<gauze> having sex with a girl who weighs twice as much as a normal girl doesn't make it a 3some