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#15074
<Bryan> I need to find some vanilla cock to drink...
#16283
<jitspoe> when I was little I had a wet dream... dreamed I was taking a pee in the toilet only to wake up and find out it wasn't the toilet I took the pee in...
<Pluto[BHG]> haha thats not a wet dream
<jitspoe> sure it is
<jitspoe> I was all wet :)
#16833
<grier> you think you're so god damn floorless
<grier> so superior
<XfitzyX> do you mean flawless?
<girer> oh fucken leave me alone
* grier has quit IRC (Exit: i am so alone in this empty world)
#51079
<[SD]Away> god i hate the my gf is an oper on a network...makes argueing impossible
Comment: random.sssinc2003.net #hosting
#56743
<MootMan> Oi! I think my life is now complete.
<MootMan> Had to cool a clients PC because it was overheatin, the fan on the heatsink was garbled.
<MootMan> I had no replacements, but I had a un-opened can of Beer sitting by, fresh from the freezer (I like to supercool the stuff to near 0*C).
<MootMan> This particular can had a fairly flat serface. I only needed the PC for 5 minutes, anyways.
<MootMan> So I took some artic silver thermal goop, and spread it on the bottom of the beer can.
<MootMan> Stuck it on the proc (a P4), and put a 15lb Cisco book on it to hold it down.
<MootMan> Vola. Sub-ambient cooling.
<goombah> 0_0 thats like blapshemy dude
<MootMan> Who cares. And besides, who needs liquid nitro when you can use BEER? Toms Hardware - "10GHZ Overclocking on Grasshoppa!".
#307141
<+ajackmeh20> You know I just thought of a Mad Men drinking game. Except it's rather simple. You just drink every time they do. You'll get drunk pretty quickly.
#297725
<CShadowRun> windows keeps telling me i might be a victim of software counterfeiting :(
<CShadowRun> i don't think of myself as a victim, more of a benificiary
#50229
(NES) I'm thinkg we should buy the condoms in bulk from costco
(Emmers) I won't need any *grins*
(NES) you're good at pulling out?
(Emmers) I'm a girl.
(NES) wtf
#63373
<@Swishy> i knew this one cat
<@Swishy> that would always sit with his crotch against the radiator
<@Swishy> turns out
<@Swishy> they didn't need to neuter him
#110375
[thom] I'm going to order one of those MIND erasing kits...
[xexyz] a bong, thom?
#310123
<@Sir_herrbatka> what is the best vi mode for emacs?
< wheybags> vim
< wheybags> alias emacs='vim'
< wheybags> (did that on a society server once as an april fools day joke :P)
< wheybags> and alias vim='emacs' too
< wheybags> one guy came on irc
< wheybags> "why is vim taking so fucking long to start up"
#60134
star: if some girl sent you a text (assume that your a boy) and it said
star: "i feel like the cat who ate all the cream"
star: bearing in mind she just had a date
star: what would you think she meant?
Sophi x: i have no idea
star: well let me tell you what i sent back
star: "full of cream? i take it the date went well"
star: now she's calling me a perv :(
#309372
<Killswitch> 1. Go to 3 random YouTube videos
<Killswitch> 2. Write "I'm pretty sure this is trance, not house."
<Killswitch> 3. Wait for a war to start.
<_tca> oh hey look another american trying to start wars for no reason
#310127
<mroman_> I should probably read about privacy laws in the US :)
<Jafet> Don't worry, it won't take that much time.
#18510
* kimura is away -( burning and cleaning the office )- at 10:16p -( P:On / L:On )-
* kimura is away -( burning CDs and cleaning the office )- at 10:16p -( P:On / L:On )-
#3194
<dot> one sex
<dot> eek
<dot> sec
<dot> damn that typo
<Alexander> sure
<Waldo> paging doctor freud...
<Waldo> paging doctor freud...
#221161
<@mikesch> the woman sitting across from me has a weird tinyhand.
<@mikesch> with the same french manicure that her other, regular, hand has.
<@jop> are you picturing it around your cock
<@mikesch> I am now, you fucker.
#49988
<moo> I want to get a stuffed kitten doll, and then go to the sporting goods store and buy one of those walnut plaques they use to mount animal heads.
<tbird> ok
<moo> After cutting the stuffed kitten doll in half (front half and back half), I'll take the back have and attach it to the plaque.
<moo> I will hang this on the wall of my office.
<tbird> ok
<moo> When people ask me what the hell it is, I will answer, "That's a cat ass trophy. I figure if I can keep it here, the business will run more smoothly."
<moo> Then, after a month of answering this question, I will detach the half-kitten doll from the plaque and leave it laying on my desk.
<moo> When people ask me what the hell happened, I will answer, "Cat ass trophic failure."
<tbird> o_O
#44738
<Perplexed> Brit, finish JR High and get back to us
<brittlala> ive finnished jr high. notice how finnished is spelled with 2 ns, ass gobbler
#8906
<vidividividi> kristen dumped me
<greggyhot> oh NO!
<vidividividi> i cant believe it
<vidividividi> i JUST bought her a 300 dollar necklace!!!
<vidividividi> at least i can count on all of you for support
*** vidividividi has been kicked by krassproduction (get the fuck out of here, you cheap jerk)
#22339
<gorefeend> my bum is all alone :/
#28294
<WillaCuz> *sigh*
<WillaCuz> why do people shoot at robocop
#41956
<@zeleftikam> yeah so on friday i installed this hard-disk MP3 player in the trunk on this new passat
<@zeleftikam> i think, while i was upside down in the trunk, my cell phone fell out of my pocket, and i sealed it in the trunk trim
<@zeleftikam> it's GONE
<@mitch> ha
<@mitch> nice work
<@zeleftikam> thx
#31941
(+ snakeyes) holy shit
(+ snakeyes) holy shit
(+ snakeyes) i have found my new vice
(+ snakeyes) inserting a syringe into my foreskin and pumping air into it
(% EyeReesh) omgf
(% EyeReesh) that is like scary dude
(+ snakeyes) why
(+ snakeyes) its so fun
(+ snakeyes) could be the first video i make with my digicam
(+ snakeyes) so far im up to 12 cc of air
(+ snakeyes) 22
<!- Later -!>
(+ snakeyes) i think im gonna try urethra air
(+ snakeyes) OH MY FUCK
(+ snakeyes) OW
(+ snakeyes) OH NO
(+ PsychoBud) lol
(+ snakeyes) HOW CAN YOU LAUGH
(+ PsychoBud) your dick explode, or your bladder?
(+ snakeyes) i dont know
(+ snakeyes) its just burning
(+ PsychoBud) probably your dick...can't get much air into something the size of
a tinkertoy
—› join: ( b4d_k4rm4)
—› mode: (ChanServ) sets (+v b4d_k4rm4)
(+ snakeyes) i will be the first to admit that i have a small penis
(+ snakeyes) ..
(+ snakeyes) hi b4d
(+ b4d_k4rm4) sup
#35474
<+fleet> morning
<+ke1th> morning honey.
<+fleet> aww sweetie, its been ages since you said that
<+ke1th> for this convo to go on anymore.. we'd just sound really gay.
<+fleet> well, according to some other deviants, they're already under the impression I am gay
<+dxd> fleets not gay? :o
<+fleet> yes, unfortunately, I am as straight as a ruler
<+dxd> :<
<+ke1th> one of those plastic ones that bend?
<+fleet> all the way round baby