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#35472
<livewireo> i tried, but i couldnt see my penis through all the vomit
<everest> ah, college
#176290
<+Tiberius> i get my women the same way a lion gets his prey
<+int16h> Stalking them?
<Ves> idiots who fall in the cage?
#301597
<fahadsadah> Lolwut?
<fahadsadah> HTML5 will be completed in 2022?
<+Dvyjones> Wait, it will be completed?
#55511
<filminfo> the only time you can be excited about diarrhea is during scrabble
<filminfo> because it's worth a shitload of points
#61068
Ryan: Whats a good lie to fill some hours in? I have a day with nothing. lol
Andrew: uh.. something with orcs?
Ryan: lol, that would be telling the truth.
Andrew: thats sad
Ryan: I was playing WoW
#39781
<phil> alright, guess what song i'm drumming on my keyboard
<phil> jhjhjhjhjhjhjhjhjhjhjhjhjhjhjhjhjhjhjhjhjhjhjhjhjhjhjhjhjhjhj
<ecks> wipeout....
<phil> wtf how'd you know?
<ecks> we're at a LAN party and you're sitting right behind me, dumbass
<phil> touche sir, touche
#2574
<blazemore> i don't even know who the beatles are
<blazemore> except for jay leno and that other guy that just died
#301229
< MacForker> Arg, my family is weird.
< MacForker> They just argued with me you can't serve pork medium.
< tonyola> conventional wisdom is that pork should be thoroughly cooked
< MacForker> Sure, 20 years ago
< CuriosTiger> Conventional wisdom is that pork from 20 years ago should not be eaten :P
#55808
<SteelHard> how r u ?
* Gen|G^2 is now known as Gen|G^ZZZ
* Gen|G^ZZZ gives SteelHard an a,e,y and o before he goes
<SteelHard> what ?
<Gen|G^ZZZ> how can i put it nicely...
* Gen|G^ZZZ is now known as TheEnglishLanguage
<TheEnglishLanguage> OH GOD IM DYING
#7334
<NihiMetal> I saw my first porno when I ws 11
<NihiMetal> It had tons of lesbian sex and stuff
<NihiMetal> I use to think that women did that shit with each other all the time
<NihiMetal> You never look at your mother and the preachers wife the same after that
#14664
<Dejocko> I lose 50 IQ points when i talk to girls, no fair
<GIJosh> you had 50?
#592
<@shmoo> i gatta shit
<@shmoo> bb tomorrow
#2082
<Brentai> Michael who?
<TonsOfFun-MasterToSmallGirls> J. Fox, Brent.
<Brentai> Oh, he's only mostly dead.
<Thom> Hutchence. An Australian rock star of little talent.
<Thom> Died having a wank.
<Brentai> Poor guy.
<Thom> Whilst hanging off've the back of a door by his tie.
<DigiGnome> His last words were "OH GOD! I'm COMING!" He never knew how right he was.
#18733
ShidouK: That was about as funny as putting myself through a woodchipper.
Rann XXV: Depends on why you put yourself through the woodchipper.
#297012
ambulance: on my dryer machine the ignition knob is an oven knob for some reason
ambulance: I turn it to 'broil' to start my dryer
#7713
<TonyD> you hatiater
<DamianMor> What on earth is a hatiater?
<TonyD> it's a word I just made up
<TonyD> someone who radiates hate
#309795
GeDaMo| What's a moba?
sixthgear| GeDaMo: an RTS game where you control one unit
sixthgear| and be a dick to people online
sixthgear| those are the two main components
#38098
<@ecks> do you have any pets that have a pension for eating things of former girlfriends?
<@f0rked> pension?
<@zeleftikam> no
<@Firebug24k> penchant
<@zeleftikam> all my pets have 401k s
#26253
(Griff) dalnet has a small man who visits each user's home in turn,. he is like santa, but he is the nickname man
(Griff) if you have been a good boy or girl he will let you register your nick
(Griff) if you have been bad he will make you Guest34535
(Griff) he's St. NickServ
#300090
<cpltn> how should i calculate if i got a picture that is 26530 x 8923 and i want to scale it down proportionally?
<OnErr0r> um.. math?
#33880
<wardrobe> well that was fun
* wardrobe walked into housemate's room. I said "hey have you been painting?" as I could smell paint. he said "yeh" and then I realised I was leaning on a wall.
#7038
<casss> divX runs slightly jittery on comp
<casss> is that cause of vid card?
<JtHMx> it's cuz you're gy
<sirg> but how does the codec know that?
<JtHMx> it's magic
<sirg> very cool!
* sirg is way impressed
#11255
<ducks> I was looking through someone's eBay auctions
<ducks> and this is what I see listed
<ducks> * GIRL SCOUT COOKIES THIN MINTS ORDER NOW!! *
<ducks> HAND PAINTED FLOWER POT VASE PICTURE FRAME
<ducks> SET OF 6 AMBER SUNFLOWER SALAD / FRUIT BOWLS
<ducks> THE CUTEST LITTLE ANGEL RAG DOLL
<ducks> STRIPPER VHS MOVIE
#443
<VicViper> dorm = jail cell with internet
<SYch0> w/ fast internet
#299795
<popemichael> I was in line to buy a new DVD player. The woman in front of me was having something delivered.
<popemichael> The clerk asked for her 'street name' she replied "I don't have one I go by Shanice."