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#52986
<vect0rx> im so sick of job interviewing.. is there a freenode chan for that?
<Erwin> Would you say job interviews were your greatest weakness? And if you joined that channel, where do you see yourself after 5 years on it?
Comment: ##C@Freenode

#35782
<DX|> what do they call those things on the side of the road? that make annoying noises when you drive over them, so you don't fall asleep?
<DX|> other than children?

#14741
<[KoF]Pyramus> you wound me, sir
<EdgeCrusher> sorry
<EdgeCrusher> ill hit harder

#33546
<@Jon|AWAY> don't download porn from stile..
<@Jon|AWAY> I thought I had a stripper video..
<@Jon|AWAY> it's a man in drag with a sparkler up his ass.

#300893
Orion: The internet is mostly cat pictures these days. I remember the good old days when the internet was conspiracy theorists, porn, and DOOM WAD files.

#24238
'mouth: Channel Spike Lee and shit'll really hit the fan.
Mach5: Okay, in this scene, you're approached by a crackhead who's offering you a blowjob in exchange for money to buy a cheeseburger.
Mach5: And, action.
'mouth: I immediately run and go home to comfort my inner turmoil with a crack pipe.
Mach5: Cut.  You're hopeless.
'mouth: Up yours. I'm an artist.
Mach5: Wait, I'll channel Paul Verhoeven.
Mach5: In this scene, you're approached by a crackhead, who is subsequently beatdown by a threesome of busty, lusty bisexuals, who proceed to offer you a blowjob in exchange for a cheeseburger.
'mouth: Are we digging for bash material or cybering at this point?
Mach5: I've lost track.  A/S/L?

#122104
Far2Paranoid: Knew this guy in HS
Far2Paranoid: Built a box with 2x 350Mhz Pentium2, back in '98
Far2Paranoid: The trick was, filled his bathtub w/ glycerin
Far2Paranoid: Took apart a mini-fridge and used the coils to cool the glycerin to ~40F
Far2Paranoid: Then sunk the box so he could OC the CPUs to 1.3Ghz
Far2Paranoid: Coolest shit I've ever seen.
AlbinoChpmnk: If this was sitting in his tub, how did he shower?
Far2Paranoid: After what I just said, what makes you think he showered?

#27265
(@Mc-Taz) anyone know this IP? 206.204.10.200
(@Mc-Taz) i should hack the hacker trying to hack me
(+Tempus) omg dude, your a dumbass taz
(+Tempus) * Resolved 206.204.10.200 to security.symantec.com

#101951
<michael__> can someone help me with my internet coennection
<Khrajin> michael__: I assure you it is working.
Comment: #ubuntu

#34071
<opivy10> i used to be a lesbian till i got my sex change
*** Dianora sets mode: +m

#3063
<Kashan> I hate it when H-manga's try to be philosophical
<dregan> Mehh.
<dregan> "As I lay there, with the cum flowing out of every hole, my schoolgirl vagina stretched beyond its natural limit by a twenty-limbed tentacle demon, I wondered 'What is the stars, what is the stars?'"

#38066
* Quits: crag-- (crag@202.154.72.136) (Dead girls dont say no)
* Quits: KiM (KiM@134.115.157.196) (going for a walk :p)
<@ShowDowN> that is sick
<@ShowDowN> we should ban him next time he comes in
<@nekro> yeah, who the hell goes for walks

#6139
Clayton: man, i am so tired..but my bed is full of dog puke.

#308504
<@Pants> Hey Grue, so I figured out what was wrong with my chainsaw
<@Grue> Ja?
<@Pants> It turns out it has an on/off switch.
<@Grue> `lart Pants
BrainBleach brings in Charles Darwin and the Chainsaw of Natural Selection to have a go at Pants
<@Grue> More apropos, BrainBleach cannot become.

#2499
<Fly_kEaT> ok so what time now in russia?
<amsea_> 17:06
<Fly_kEaT> am or pm?

#37079
<Jonnyb0y> brb
<Jonnyb0y> need to use land line
* Jonnyb0y has quit IRC
<fc9k> rofl jonny is on 56k :D
<RaBiD> dont take the piss out of the handicapped

#32107
<tinglanchio> i can't imagine you making a mother's day card
<tlozoot> I didn't
<tlozoot> although this is mighty fun
<tlozoot> I got her some yahoo shit
<tlozoot> heh
<tinglanchio> how thoughtful
<tlozoot> I dont' think she was too thrilled
<tlozoot> oh well.
<tlozoot> I tried... ok, I didn't try
<tlozoot> whatever

#27818
<Redback> when i win lotto im gonna buy a dual g5 and not use it just to spite all the mac users that cant afford one
* Redback = bastard

#306378
dcNate2: wow the UN says internet access is a human right?
Crispy`: dcNate2: Yep./
dcNate2: free internet for all?
Crispy`: well
Crispy`: I have a dream
Crispy`: that one day, we will break free from the chains of oppression
Crispy`: all of God's children
Crispy`: DSL users
Crispy`: cable users
Crispy`: satellite internet users
Crispy`: will be united as one under an internet that imposes no caps!
Crispy`: No restrictions! no limits! No censorship nor greedy corporate owners!
Crispy`: We are all free and equal under the tubes!
dcNate2: judge me not by my ISP, but the QoS of my connection!

#32200
[ tw1tch ] god my gf has a nice ass
[ @ThUg_WiGGa ] pic plz
[ tw1tch ] screw you :P its for my ass only
[ @ThUg_WiGGa ] eyes*
[ tw1tch ] yeah
[ tw1tch ] see, I have a one track ass
[ tw1tch ] mind* damnit!
Comment: #d2jsp

#309369
<theazman> Hey everyone, how do I return an object?
<k5__> return object;
<theazman> Thanks
<deuteros_> that was a tough one
Comment: ##java

#9595
<Sunil> Theoretically, if I were to know your password, what would it be?

#18952
<NapkinEater> I had a dream about a game show where parents compete to see who can keep their baby in the freezer the longest.

#44068
<Xenophon> trying to redirect modules.php?name=Forums&whatever... to index.php?q=forum using mod_rewrite ; This is what I have, but doesn't seem to work:
<Toba82> nothing generally does not work.
<Xenophon>   #RewriteCond %{REQUEST_FILENAME} !-f     #RewriteCond %{REQUEST_FILENAME} !-d     #RewriteCond %{QUERY_STRING} ^name=Forums([^&]+)$   #RewriteRule modules.php index.php?q=forum [L]
<Toba82> hmmm....
<Toba82> the fact that it's all commented out may be affecting it
<Toba82> just a guess
Comment: #apache, EFNet

#302208
<erin> Dammit, Windows! I KNOW the program is not responding. That's why I'm trying to close it.

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