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#301557
<oOrEPPiEOo> what's the furthest you've gone, in baseball analogies
<oOrEPPiEOo> with a member of the opposite sex
<inline4chan> I've never left the dugout
<Trolly> i get ESPN
#30237
<Tim_Kwan> ROBAT DON'T U HAVE ANYTHING BETTER TO DO?
<ROBAT> YES
<ROBAT> I AM DOING 5 THINGS AT ONCE
<ROBAT> 1 OF THEM IS YOUR MOM
Comment: That was just wrong >.<
#29223
<zim> I can't look at the words "Windows XP" and not think that Microsoft are sticking their tongue out at us
#39526
< The_Q> su - 9070b574c12
< The_Q> aww man. ignore that -- it's not my root password!!!!!
-!- The_Q [~xxx@xxx] has quit ["0wned"]
-!- The_Q [~xxx@xxx has joined #channel]
< The_Q> Hey, wtf happened to my box?!?!
#33294
<jessie> I'm going to put on my skimpiest maternity outfit and go bar hopping.
Comment: #fark on irc.irvingnet.net
#310585
< rycuda> Well, turns out that I need glasses
< BrainoMite> rycuda, walk into the wall again?
< rycuda> BrainoMite: close, I walked into an optician
#7774
<chaowork> dont singe the wenis
<faustwork> yeah, nude bacon cooking is tricky
<chaowork> i hear thats gonna be in the next olympics
<faustwork> you should see how i flip it over
#34621
* StoneCold Cringes
<StoneCold> I have reached a new level off geekendom. I was talking on the phone to someone and I said cringe out loud.
#8472
<helminthes> and the little basket at the counter says tips, so you hock a big loogie in it and then you realize what you did and say, "oh shit i'm dyslexic"
#300619
<sandm> if there are any tools to analyze memory leaks etc?
<_habnabit> valgrind.
<delimax> valgrind
<Chris> valgrind!!
<sandm> thanx all for answers....
<Chris> you're welcome, it helps to get different answers from different points of view.
#39844
<+Demanther> your fired
<@Alien> you're
<@Jimstang> hahahaha the forener is correcting the American on english
<@Alien> foreigner
Comment: Jimstang's the American too :)
#48894
<@cripwalker> my girlfriend is so fucking cool.
<@cripwalker> we were arguing in IM last night about techtv being lame since g4 took over.
<@cripwalker> she thinks its better now that theres more "pretty" people on it.
<@cripwalker> that filter girl is, like, her idol.
<@cripwalker> anyway, i wasn't giving up. i really believe that channel to be a lost cause, now.
<@cripwalker> so she says to me "i'm gonna come over there and beat some sense in to you"
<@cripwalker> then she logs out.
<@cripwalker> about 10 minutes later, she pulls up in her car, runs into the house, walks in like she owns the damned place, and punches me hard as hell in the arm. no hello, or nothing.
<@cripwalker> then she leaves. didn't even say goodbye. i was totally speechless.
<@cripwalker> sure enough, 10 minutes later she logs back on.
<@cripwalker> she says "i knew you'd see things my way."
<@cripwalker> then she asks if she can come over to watch tv...
<@cripwalker> i'm sooo gonna marry her!
#51438
<@bailz> Cum.In.My.Ass.Not.In.My.Mouth.3.DVDRiP.SVCD-IJS
<@bailz> hawt
<Hobbes|1Day> thats fucking disgusting
<Hobbes|1Day> who the fuck uses svcd anymore??
#30111
<regwaur> <nwmann> i've been able to get my tongue to touch the tip of my cock before
<R0y> dude i used to be able to get my whole shaft into my throat
<Matt^^^> I've been able to get the top 3
<regwaur> ahahaa
<Matt^^^> I've been able to get the top 3" of my cock in my mouth
<regwaur> why even have a gf then r0y
<R0y> because she makes me feel whole and good
<enoggy> dude
<enoggy> people who constantly try to suck their own dick worry me
<regwaur> question is
<regwaur> if you could suck your dick, would you swallow?
<enoggy> hahah
<R0y> fuck ya
#8800
<happy> i have problems cooking on the stove, because i run into my room to chat on irc or somehting, and it catches fire
#46339
<oneTraicovn> I still think that the porn domain should have been .cum and not .xxx
#145960
Reiver: How fast are the taps?
Mango: tap tap tap tap tap tap tap
Mango: about that fast
#49056
DJ Yiffyness: your lucky, i want to paw off too but my mom/sister is home
The JaX04: I hope you dont mean that as in they are one and the same
#339
<locust> Hey phil how do I get rid of my ip number
#28422
[Derek PING]
[Derek PING reply]: Your connection is horrible get DSL you fucking hobo
<Derek> :(
#37341
<Zao> It's typo evening tonight, everyone is invited.
<rpop> htank you
#55431
[`42`Kyle] `42` is a one man clan
[orangekid] can i join?
[`42`Kyle] ...
#14367
<Krogzar> !8ball may i kick you?
<SDs8ball> Krogzar : YES IN DUE TIME
*** SDs8ball was kicked by P ((Krogzar) ta time is due)
#30394
(SnapScan): hablais español?
(Picasso-): I would like TWO soft tacos and a large pepsi
#8745
<fraggle> when i typed lesbian i almost typed debian