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#2220
<blazemore> where did you find this, sych0
<blazemore> did you just type in "crap" and download whatever came up?
#44593
<+Timmy> what is the point of IPs?
<+Timmy> like what can u do with them?
<&Edwards> you use them to talk to computers
<+Timmy> ok
<+Timmy> why not use MSN?
#231
<ArIck> mann
<ArIck> i sure am getting a porno addiction
<ArIck> i mean, i feel empty in the morning if i haven't found good porno
#14711
<Snacktify> what happens if a girl who is in the olympics is going to have her period during competition?
<deltax> then they put off the 100m cunnilingus for a week
<deltax> "this event cancelled due to bad turf" etc
#299678
<m4tt> lol, still up huh?
<jm7316> There's porn to be watched, and damnit, someone has to do it
<m4tt> that is mighty selfless of you
<jm7316> I do what I can for humanity.
<m4tt> im not sure where we'd be without you
<jm7316> Overflowing with unindexed, unmetatagged, uncategorized pornography.
#31925
<Shloom> OMG
<Shloom> FUCK
<Shloom> I just showed this girl my wang on my webcam
<Shloom> But not only did I hear her giggle
<Shloom> but 2 other girls and a man
<Shloom> D:!
<Shloom> FUCK
#51015
Nail: my chemistry teacher has bad grammar
Traceur: how so
Nail: princiPAL laws of quantum numbers
Traceur: he put principle?
Nail: no
Nail: put principal
Traceur: do yuo know the difference between those two wordS?
Nail: yeah, principal is like the school administrator
Nail: because he's your pal
Traceur: 'principal' also means 'main'
Traceur: a 'principle' is a concept
Traceur: your principal failure comes from not understanding the principles of grammar.
Nail: fuck you.
#4451
<amoeba> mouse gestures = OMG IM TOO LAZY TO PRESS TEH BUTTONS ON TEH KEYBOARD
<@tr0n> HEY IF I MOVE IT IN AN S PATTERN AND THEN A ZIGZAG AND THEN A SQUARE SHAPE IT WILL TAKE ME TO FAGS.NET
#299795
<popemichael> I was in line to buy a new DVD player. The woman in front of me was having something delivered.
<popemichael> The clerk asked for her 'street name' she replied "I don't have one I go by Shanice."
#20253
(syanide): whats a hacking master?
(DownKaos-): syanide: it's one of those guys who drinks a lot of red bull and jerks off to animated porn in his star trek suit
#73760
<+psych0sys> as long as your farts dont smell like vasoline youre golden
<@Spirilis> what if they do?
<+psych0sys> means jk0s been watching you sleep
#3483
<Darksyde> dood you make texas look like a big dildo
<blazemore> i'd rather be a big dildo than a small dildo
<blazemore> especially the kind the secretes fake jizz that tastes like oranges
<Geek-> lol
<Geek-> how would you know about that shit?
* blazemore is away
#33787
(Deranged): I fell asleep on the couch watching TV last night, and when I woke up at 4am, I had a hard on. I looked at the TV, and a Girls Gone Wild special was on. It was like it was meant to be.
#52252
<gordonjcp> Tesco petrol pumps have a button to press if you want to pay at the pump
<gordonjcp> it's got a braille label
<gordonjcp> don't know what it says though
<gordonjcp> "Get the fuck off the road!" possibly
#13476
<[cr0wz]> my dildo hurts
<_SuPeR_Fly_> my arse hurts
<wisteria101> see a doc
<[cr0wz]> i wonder why
* FadeJade sees a connection
#41182
<J_MAN> what sex are you and how old
<Samsa> my name is Gregor Samsa, and I awoke this morning to find myself transformed into a monstrous vermin
#4319
<josho> having eggo "pissed" at me was like having a rabid chihuahua yiping at you becuase you stepped on its oversized genitals
<Guilty> See you just complemented eggo again
#61121
<Ked|work> You know you've used linux more than google when typing 'man pipe' into the search bar doesn't instantly seem like a bad idea.
#6229
<aXo> What an amazing weekend I had! I ate thirteen TV dinners, jacked off sixteen times and consumed one alcoholic beverage all without moving from this chair. I'm about to watch Godfather Part 3, then eat a bag of Doritos and pass out in a pool of my own saliva.
#558
<@xvize> xwin is like an os
#8812
<+Sheri> *gasp* I neverrrrrr
<@LabMonkey> the fuck you didn't, I videotaped that shit
#299964
<Xe0n> $|=3,141592;sub _
<Xe0n> {print@_}sub o{_++$O[0
<Xe0n> ];_ 0for 1..$#O}sub O{$;=int
<Xe0n> $=/10,'0/^ ^';if($;<9)
<Xe0n> {_$_ for @O;;@O=()
<Xe0n> ;0}push @O,$;;0
<Xe0n> ,;push@ O,'.'if
<Xe0n> $^==1; 0;if($;
<Xe0n> ==10){ print ,o,@O=(
<Xe0n> )}}$~= 1000000 ;$-=10*
<Xe0n> (q/@O= digits of pi =10/,1)
<Xe0n> *int($~ /3)+1;$
<Xe0n> _=2for@ ,[0..$-]
<Xe0n> ,;for$^ (1..$~){
<Xe0n> $:=$-;$O =0;until
<Xe0n> ($:<0){$/= 2*$:+1;$/=
<Xe0n> 10if$/==1;$==10*$,[$:]+$O;$,
<Xe0n> [$:]=$=%$/;$O=int($=/$/
<Xe0n> )*$:--,10}O}o
<Xe0n> run it
<Xe0n> see how long it takes for your compy to finish it
<Xe0n> it's perl
<DerpDerp> No, it's gay
<DerpDerp> and it probably makes my CD trap open every 30 seconds
<DerpDerp> probably
<DerpDerp> tray
<phantomcircuit> actually it looks like it calculates pi
<Xe0n> ^
<Xe0n> Because it does
<phantomcircuit> but being perl it could just as well launch some nuclear missiles
#25608
<Drugdown> I believe when you die its just like before you were born.
<Drugdown> ...nothingness.
<Fleebis> Like when you empty your recycle bin!
#154605
<@randi> seething. in. rage.
<@randi> i mean, seriously. who the fuck tries to connect to ssl via ssh?
<@randi> ssh must be the end all solution for connecting to *anything* that is encrypted
<@randi> i mean, my god.
<@randi> seriously.
<@randi> how the fuck did i ever have sex with him.
<@Verjigorm> Tab A, slot B
<@rm-fr> you had sex with someone who doesn't know the difference between ssh and ssl and who can't configure a FreeBSD workstation?
<@randi> YES
<@randi> i'm going to go home and scrub my vag until it bleeds.
Comment: #bifemunix on EFnet
#140216
<Pit> I take off your shirt
<Pit> undressing you slowly
<Pit> you're a girl, right?
<dest> no :|
<Pit> I put on your shirt
<Pit> quickly
<Pit> and leave