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#29707
<danamania> http://www.tdcj.state.tx.us/stat/finalmeals.htm is a list of peoples last meal requests in texas
<danamania> before execution.
<danamania> lots of cheeseburgers there
<Hamster> oh thats really sad
<Hamster> it looks like criminals drink coke. pepsi marketing needs to get hold of this
#51956
<coaster> i wrapped myself in a ton of bubblewrap once and jumped from the 4th floor
<irishlace> no you didn't... LOL
<coaster> yes i did
<irishlace> wtf were you on?
<coaster> well, i was on the 4th floor
<coaster> then the first
Comment: irc.lessthanthree.us #<3
#38545
* Cobalt_Goddess has a 1337 H4X0|2 (47
<MissLursa> lol
<Cobalt_Goddess> my kitty sable was sitting on the desk right?
<Cobalt_Goddess> and got up to feed her
<Cobalt_Goddess> and she hit the keybord jumping down
<Cobalt_Goddess> and typed 347
#903
<hypr> joo do any drugs today?
<`gb> i don't do drugs fuckface
<hypr> what is pot then
<`gb> a plant
#296678
<ZeroButte> man, its hard to read trainspotting
<gord-sofa> i dont need to read trainspotting, i saw the movie and grew up in the north of england ;)
<Chickenhen> you mean you can't read the book, as you grew up in north of england, so you watched the movie?
#101859
[@TheWickerMan] Sometimes when I'm sad I echo happy phrases to myself like /echo you're a winner !!!
[@ias] that's sad
you're a winner !!!
#301633
<HalfNote5> Have you ever noticed that everyone loves a comedy site right up until it's something important to them that's being satirized or made fun of? "I LOVED it when you made fun of Nazis, the KKK, and the Spanish Inquisition, but I'll have you know, as a Rural American Militia member, I'm insulted that you refer to our 'Justice Dorms' as 'Compounds'. I'll never read your crappy site again!"
#42149
<J3anyus> shit, i'm very conservative but god damn, legalize weed
<richo_> if you had weed and alcohol legal
<richo_> and after 2 months
<richo_> asked the population which one should be outlawed..
<richo_> it'd pry be the one that causes daddy to hit you
<richo_> not the one that causes daddy to cook extra kraft dinner
#33694
(Cloud): I see retarded people.
(@NeoMatrix): Stop looking in the mirror.
#251320
Zac2: "Scientists Find Gene That Makes You Good at Halo Also Makes You a Premature Ejaculator"
Jed_Reality: New Macbooks announced.
#34236
<unchellmatt> weewoo: I had a spammer pissed at me for reporting her "Free Psychic Readings" mailings and getting her shut down. She flames me with "If you didn't want the mail, why didn't you just reply and ask to be removed?!?!"
<unchellmatt> I replied "You're the fucking psychic.... YOu figure it out"
#1083
<thinkmad> vvhat is pengs real name
<timmo> chris
<timmo> is your w broken?
<thinkmad> no
#70993
<@TheWickerMan> God damn, this one halloween last year. Some kid came up to our house.
<@TheWickerMan> Now this is the kind of kid who's constantly cursing, throwing fits about nothing, hitting his parents/siblings, complaning about everything, and just acts like an all-around douchebag.
<@TheWickerMan> I gave the kid like 3 fun sized M&Ms and he just yells to me, "NO FAG I WANTED THE TWIX INSTEAD YOU DUMBASS."
<@TheWickerMan> I replied back with "I'm sure your mother didn't want you either, but we can't all have our ways now can we?."
#311147
<BaloneyGeek> TIL Samsung has a fashion division
<Fuchs> well, they make wearables
<BaloneyGeek> Also clothes, apparently
<BaloneyGeek> They also make military hardware
<BaloneyGeek> And they, in some capacity, were fundamental to the building of both the Petronas Twin Towers and the Mia Khalifa
<BaloneyGeek> Err... Burj Khalifa
#301251
<timmo> anytime i yell at a woman and im really angry i think CUNT
<timmo> i only say it half the time though
<timmo> its like the a bomb of yelling at a woman
<snow_> i've had worse experiences calling a girl fat than a cunt
<timmo> how about you fat cunt
<snow_> haven't tried that one
<timmo> you know, cover your bases
<Alphamaze> In my experience, calling a girl a cunt will get her angry, while calling her fat will make her sad.
<Alphamaze> Calling her a fat cunt will result in a woman that is confused about her emotions.
Comment: EFnet #geekissues
#4456
<HailBrak> me: "we should form a company that makes manly china patterns"
<HailBrak> my friend: "i agree. i mean, how much success am i supposed to have when all the patterns are called "tender blossom" or some shit? i want one called, like, "Glock" or "Beer and Tits" or "Lets Burn Down Fucking Pier 1"
#12144
<Zip-> hi RedMage
<Zip-> i want your mother's sister's daughter's cousin's best friend's body
<RedMage> ...
<RedMage> that's like
<RedMage> my best friend
<RedMage> you sick fuck
<RedMage> i'm my own best friend
<RedMage> omg
<RedMage> you WANT ME
#8449
<undrewb> you know max, while the paralympics were very inspiring, you shouldnt let them delude you into thihnking all retards can achieve the impossible :)
#276
<papasui> i bought a box of crab ragoons
<papasui> and i looked to see how many calories are in each one
<papasui> and its freaking 400 and 250 fat calories
<Marcus-> "WARNING: May cause manboobs!"
#2555
<@SYch0> fuck
<@SYch0> this is gonna be harder than i thought
<@BlackDeth> are you looking for your penis again
#300636
<@mikesch> Google Wave was built to show younger people how older people feel when they try to use the internet.
#300059
<Warchamp7> I have a PSD in graphics design
#76837
<GnrlMc> The closest you ever got to asking her out was using the characters of her name as iterators in your programming projects...
#42690
<@DXtremz> root@tweety [~]# uptime
<@DXtremz> 9:22pm up 111 days, 5:42, 1 user, load average: 0.00, 0.13, 0.20
<@sock> each person and his merits.
<@sock> you make a remote machine run for 4 months,
<@sock> while your roomie fucks chicks hard \o/
<@DXtremz> Exactly.
#28890
<PRoWoRK> i like my vagina!
<[Piratez]> o.o
<PRoWoRK> ...sorry...
<[Piratez]> pro, this is the part where u type 'wrong chan'