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#4319
<josho> having eggo "pissed" at me was like having a rabid chihuahua yiping at you becuase you stepped on its oversized genitals
<Guilty> See you just complemented eggo again
#10890
<gldnmean> I always thought "The sound of one hand clapping" would be good zen masturbation slang
#33692
<BasSCadeT> man my cat pissed on my bed the other day (this is gross) and i rolled over into it face first
#34174
<Guyp> my mom wont let me go to the gym
<Guyp> she thinks i'll look at girls and my mind will be sinning ;[
<Guyp> so i think i'll ask her if a gay gym is ok :>
#154728
<Fox> I did a job in a house completely totaled by katrina today
<Fox> everything was ruined, destroyed, broken, except one thing
<Fox> a goku figurine
#8961
[T-Doo|art] when you think about evil, what pops up?
[Rosewood] Daikatana
#3389
<Ad0> anyone got monsters inc?
<Ad0> my gf wants to see it
<Idler> Ad0: No, but I got a monster in my pants
<Idler> and I bet your girlfriend wants to see that
#38430
<junipre> PERSONAL NOTE, MENTHOLATED ITCH RELIEF CREAM IS NOT A GOOD IDEA FOR ITCHY BALLS.
<junipre> i am away: shower (Left at: 06:29PM)
#6771
* Fox-20 is down with gcc (yeah you know me)
#3169
<myst> of course with all the pro- USA, rah, rah, crap we hear... i probally just ignored it
<Joshua> ah damn, i'm sorry about that
<myst> ah teens and guns. yes i have read a few stories on that topic.
<Joshua> as an american, i'm going to have to appologys
<Joshua> *appologies?
<Joshua> soemthing like that
<Joshua> fuck it
<Joshua> i'm an american
<Joshua> i don't have to spell
#624
<MadHatter> sjkdfkl;'
<Jingoro`> hatters snorting off his keyboard again
#30447
<Scoth> Olyndar: You coughed on her? How rude
<Olyndar> She liked it.
<Olyndar> She's kinky like that.
* lemming chuckles
<lemming> hmm
<Olyndar> FEEL THE GERMS INVADING YOUR BODY LIKE SO MANY TINY PENISES!
#9329
<@PakiSpice> missy elliot bothers me
<fromtheashes> that video where she wore a garbage bag scared the bejesus outta me
<fromtheashes> im a supa fly, supa dupa fly
<@PakiSpice> yea
<@PakiSpice> i think it left me somewhat scarred
<fromtheashes> why don't you supa dupa fly your fat ass out of a 4th story window
<fromtheashes> and stop giving me nightmares
#47251
[@xe\ara] a kid raped a care bear at my store a while back
[@xe\ara] cut a hole in it
[@xe\ara] and bam
[@xe\ara] left some nog in it. the woman that found him doing that
[@xe\ara] thought he was stuffin it with shit to steal
[@xe\ara] reached her hand in...
[@xe\ara] wasnt pleasant
Comment: #sbk irc.enterthegame.com
#3168
<myst> yeah i suck at snowboarding too
<myst> skiing easier
<Joshua> yeah, i broke my arm and then my dad walked up to my twisted wreck of a body and told me i was faking it.
<Joshua> he wouldn't even take me to the doctor's until my mom came home and yelled at him.
<myst> lol! ah parents
#310654
<Jigsy^Vol> My favorite episode of Star Wars was when Kirk got assimilated by the Darleks.
#6026
<kim-> pat youve had your share of irc fucks
<ultrafunk> yeah like 3
<ultrafunk> 2 i never saw again
<thebigo> why, did you take them off /notify?
#4576
<MattDC> how big is the back of a CD case cover (including spines) in inches?
<CraiZE> MattDC i can send you a program
<CraiZE> that prints you covers in the good size
<MattDC> i have one, but i need to know for graphic arts class
<CraiZE> ah well then , i got no idea
<mahs> MattDC: you could umm. use a ruler
<_8ight> well. if you cant find a ruler. i found this info that may aid you in a makeshift ruler.
<_8ight> According to A Descriptive Dictionary and Atlas of Sexology (Francoeur et al., 1991), the human penis in a flaccid state on average is between 3 and 4 inches in length and 1 inch in diameter. In an erect state, the penis, on average, is between 5 to 7 inches in length and 1.5 inches in diameter.
#25374
<Demonhunter> so.. i may be losing my cable modem soon.. who knows
<Idle_Timmy> man, that sucks.
<Idle_Timmy> maybe you need a mike's hard lemonade.
<Demonhunter> i need a liter of jaggermeister
<Demonhunter> and alzadie
<Idle_Timmy> tell me a hooker couldn't help.
<Demonhunter> depends on the hooker
<Idle Timmy> a hooker with dsl in her hotel room
<Demonhunter> ohh...
<Demonhunter> now i could use that
<Demonhunter> i would be downloading so much porn with her dsl connection...
<Idle_Timmy> "What kind of 'bandwidth' do you get, if you know what i mean"
<Demonhunter> hehe
<Idle_Timmy> "Depends on your 'hardware', sugar" ;o
<Idle_Timmy> "So where can i 'plug it in'?"
<Idle_Timmy> "oooohh, you bring the 'modem', big boy, and i'll give you an 'outlet'"
<Idle_Timmy> "oh yeah, baby, I got your modem RIGHT HERE"
<Idle_Timmy> *pulls a laptop out of his trenchcoat*
<Demonhunter> lmao...
<Idle_Timmy> "now let's see if my 'router' is compatible with your 'hub' and we can get some 'peer to peer' action going"
#7796
<Daki> thanks i know
<Azalyn> aww
<Azalyn> *smack*
<Azalyn> your so cute when you get smacked
<Azalyn> *smack*smack*
<Azalyn> awwwww!!!!
<Azalyn> *smack*smack*smack!*smack!!-crack* err, oh shit.. o.o i think i killed him >.<
*** Daki (gg@sc-66-74-86-145.socal.rr.com) Quit (Read error: Connection reset by peer)
<Azalyn> O_O
#297849
<mistah_j> If you watch porn in reverse it's about a guy who vacuums jizz of a woman's face and then takes his Pizza back to work
#217199
<BlackMage> ...What the hell.
<BlackMage> I went to use the phone... and it shouts at me that it has incorrect network settings.
<BlackMage> What the fuck, liar.
<BlackMage> Now it's saying that I'm a new user. :(
<BlackMage> I don't want this phone anymore.
Comment: irc.xevium.net
#43461
<RedBeard> should breakfast cereal be patentable?
<RedBeard> i mean, what if i come up with some insanely good cereal that everybody wants? kellogg's will just make a ripoff and steal all my profits!
<Syntacs> I imagine a precise forumla is patentable. But I think it's pretty easy to make knockoff foods that taste the same.
<RedBeard> probably
<Syntacs> Sort of like when pork was invented, and decimated the cannibalism market.
#10726
<FuriousG> shan|bbl
<FuriousG> you there?
<FuriousG> guess not
<FuriousG> but, one day, you will be there, and then, then... you will be at my mercy, and i will not be benevolent
<FuriousG> *sigh*
<FuriousG> i need to get out more.
#61921
<Rem0> the hitler miniseries was pretty cool
<ANGRY> damn i missed it, what happened?