Random | Latest | Best | Full Site
#14357
<Farnarcle> why are you helping her to knock you?
<GruMM[GruMM[Away[GruMM]]]> coz if it is going to be done, it should be done right'
#35763
<TMH-> Tip of the day: Do not packet sniff your family's internet traffic, you may find out more than you want to know about them. That is all.
#2574
<blazemore> i don't even know who the beatles are
<blazemore> except for jay leno and that other guy that just died
#56484
<ShakespeareFan00> Is there a list of known troublemakers somewhere?
<ShakespeareFan00> So that the relative newbies like myself can avoid them...
<zocky> ShakespeareFan00, if you're using a standard IRC client, there's a list on your right.
Comment: #wikipedia
#301278
<DaynaGirl> I had an app once... it adjusted your volume to full in all regards... then screamed out into the darkness "Hey!!! Look at me!!! I'm watching PORN over here!!!"
<DaynaGirl> then it kindly returned everything back to normal settings.
<reiser> hahaha DaynaGirl
<zarko> DaynaGirl: i believe i saw such a web site
<zarko> it opened dozens of windows, filled with gay porn, and played that msg repetitively
<zarko> well, it said "GAY porn"
<DaynaGirl> I thought it was so funny... I renamed it "DaynaNude.Exe" and kept a copy on the desktop.
<DaynaGirl> one night at about 2am... I'm awoken to the app playing...
<DaynaGirl> I rush out to my puter to find my mother turning forty shades of purple...
#295188
<Liempt> Wtf?
<Liempt> The wiki article on Iron Maiden is about some stupid band.
#4659
<Kyle|> im making a SHELL for WINDOWS that LOOKS and FEELS like the REAL STANDALONE OS THAT WILL BE DONE NOT SOON!
<Urganite> what you mean to tell me
<Urganite> is that you're going to create a windows program
<Urganite> that just looks like what you want your OS to be?
<Urganite> ...
<Urganite> that's the stupidest thing I've ever heard in my life
<Peasant> Someone should make a DHTML OS
<Kyle|> peasant: dont give me ideas
#11066
InVerSeX: I scanned my penis in a flatbed scanner once.
The Spunn: did it hurt?
InVerSeX: No, I didn't close the lid.
InVerSeX: It was only a 14" scanner.
The Spunn: Ah, so you couldn't scan the whole thing.
InVerSeX: Exactly.
The Spunn: I had to fold mine in half to fit it all on the 14" scanner, that's the part that hurt the most.
InVerSeX: Well, I scanned mine limp and then used photoshop to get a stiffy.
#305931
<Joh> The worst part of life:
<Joh> That time between being able to drive the little cars at legoland and being able to drive real cars.
#299580
<Pryoidain> Alright, my QDB script is complete!
<asaph> QDB Script?
<Pryoidain> Yeah, see I got tired of the weird thing they use where 1 positive vote and 1 negative vote cancel out to give 0 votes in the numerator of your quote rating...
<Pryoidain> So I devised a formula. Positive Votes = Numerator + [(Denominator - Numerator)/2]
<Pryoidain> I then made a script that searches for my nick on QDB, gathers the various quote levels, runs the above formula, and then tells me how much people love me!
<cjk> Interesting. I may want a copy.
<Pryoidain> Execute Nao!
*five minutes pass*
<Pryoidain> Hm. It must have failed.
<Pryoidain> Either that or -pi people enjoy my quotes.
<asaph> The latter option seems more plausible.
<Pryoidain> Fuck off.
#12949
<boarsai> funnily enough it took me a few minutes to realise my pen didn't have "alt + z" capabilities...
#2830
*** bigdick (happy@12-232-82-116.client.attbi.com) has joined #cars
*** BigCunt is now known as RaMTuFF
* bigdick slides into BigCunt
*** bigdick (happy@12-232-82-116.client.attbi.com) has left #cars
<shaan> well that doesnt happen everyday
#8271
*** Haggis has quit IRC (Quit: Sometimes I try to masturbate long words into a conversation. Even if I dont know what they mean.)
#242915
AzuiSleet: aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
Ortzinator: is that a "penis caught in zipper" scream or a "omg i just lost 3 hours worth of code" scream?
#304590
<geniice> and lets face it if your backup plan is to fill the area with liquid helium you've chosen quite an exciting life
#3259
(acidic) i love it how my g/f calls me "fucker" with so much affection.
#182
<Infe5> A PS2 costs ?40,000, a PSOne costs ?15,000, and a Hello Kitty DC costs ?28,800. :(
<EtherMan> how much is that in real money
#7239
<fo0bar> fuck, how do I contact the IRS?
<egon> cheat on your taxes... they'll contact you.
#8136
<Iceman> [TnT PING reply]: 1min 7secs
<TnT> ?
<TnT> Shiet
* TnT stops downloading Pron
#11185
<[AFT]^Kempi> what really got her mad was....
<[AFT]^Kempi> when i was burning a CD and got up from sex 1/2 way through and changed the cd
<[AFT]^Kempi> she didn't talk to me for a while
#3452
<Blackmail> I should get a realdoll
<Blackmail> imagine me applying for a loan for that from my bank "yeah, I need a love doll"
<tobdude> LOL
<zerox> I'm sure you could get a realdoll on ebay for half the price
<Blackmail> ew, a used one
<Blackmail> and not made the way I want it either
<zerox> is this the one you want Blackmail
<zerox> http://www.realdoll.com/maledoll1.html
<aNuBiS-> hahah
<Blackmail> I want a she-he-doll
<tobdude> thats so wrong
<CanOfSpam> We're long overdue for an Oprah doll
<Blackmail> UPS won't take anything that heavy
<CanOfSpam> oh
#303811
<@[Cadaver]> cops don't have a sense of humor -_-
<@[Cadaver]> so there I was cycling (without lights) on an unlit road in the rain
<@[Cadaver]> I make a small turn and my wheels slide away and fall on my chin.
<@[Cadaver]> cheek is bleeding.
<@[Cadaver]> (and my lips aparently, but I didn't noticed this)
<@[Cadaver]> to prevent blood on my chothing I wipe it away with my hands and continue cycling home
<@[Cadaver]> clothing*
<@[Cadaver]> after a while a cop spots me and stops me
<@[Cadaver]> when he noticed the blood on cheeck/lips and hands he asks me from who it is
<@[Cadaver]> 'the blood of 7 holy virgins' wasn't an acceptable answer :(
<@[Cadaver]> spent 8 hours at the station for blood tests and a conversation with a psychologist
#11350
<davis> you're site reminds me of a commercial
<MyBodyIs4Sale> which commercial?
<davis> the one where the girl dumps the guy because of his lack of substance on his web page
#820
<TwiLyght> Toby on @#gayphonesex @#gaydads4sons @#gayteensex @#gayboysex @#gayteenboys
<TwiLyght> ack!
<TwiLyght> you dirtied my computer with /whois toby
#310235
<worstcase> once we look at women as 3d printers i think abortion wont be as much of a big deal