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#113791
<druggy> i heard something about the us army having some solvers of battlefield problems which behave like rts bots
<longshock> so they stockpile resources then do wave after wave of tank rushes?
#11074
<Wi|d-Ride> I'm madder than a 3 legged dog trying to hide a turd on a frozen pond.
#16488
<@SpamapS> he was just a complete asshole to me last night... and then was talking shit about it after I left
<@Redb3ard> dude, i didnt see it haappen
<@SpamapS> I was arguing with him that ReiserFS was better for directory lookups, because it used b-trees to store meta data...
<@SpamapS> so he's like .. "Do you even know what a b-tree is?" ... I told him to kiss my ass...
<@SpamapS> He says "I have my algorithms and data structures book here... so tell me what a b-tree is"...
<@Redb3ard> um
<@Redb3ard> you do realize, that this finalizes your geekhood
<@SpamapS> At which point, I told him I didn't need this crap anymore and went to bed...
<@Redb3ard> there is no turning back, its irreversible, ta this late stage
#7775
<n> the only thing that gets him away from eq is beer
<Doza> at least he hasn't totally sold out
<n> what we need is a helmet we can strap onto him... with tubes that go down his thoat... and you hook it up to the puter... and it dispenses beer every time he gets a frag
<n> then he'll play q3
#302018
<@ rotor> a friend of mine had a parrot and it loved being pushed around on it's back
<@ rotor> it would make "vrrrm vrrmm" type truck noises when you did it
<@ rotor> it was pretty cool
#304897
<+Henry> i'm fine with girls
<+Henry> they just don't like me tbh
<%primality> that's normal, Henry
<%primality> girls generally dislike most people
<%primality> you have to get past their firewall of hormones and rage
<%primality> iptables -P GIRLS DENY
<%primality> that's their config
<sudokun> lol
<%primality> you have to invoke iptables -A GIRLS -p relationships --sgender male -j ACCEPT
<sudokun> primality, that'd make girls whores
<sudokun> since there's no source identifier, they'd accept all males
<%primality> bah
<%primality> iptables -A GIRLS -p relationships --sgender male --sname Henry -j ACCEPT
<%primality> ^ fixed
<+Henry> this is why I should never ask for relationship advice in #linux
<+Henry> but on the other hand, I feel like I understand girls a little better now O_o
#45903
<thinman> we should start a compy porn site, with pictures of computers with their covers off
<@joseph> haha
<@joseph> like furniture porn
<thinman> Choose your fetish: x86 + x86 : x86 + PowerPC : x86 with RAIDs : RAIDs on RAIDs : Macs with two mouse buttons : Barely legal Laptops : Dirty Printer Stories : x86's with DUAL 22" Monitors! : HUGE Floppy insertions : Role Play
Comment: #filter on SlashNET
#122527
Mistah_Kurtz: you think lawyers have like a numerical batting average
Mistah_Kurtz: for cases won vs lost
Mistah_Kurtz: so that other lawyers know about them
Mistah_Kurtz: they could make lawyer trading cards
Mistah_Kurtz: and it'd be worth a shitload of money if you got like a johnnie cochran law school card
#29444
<Procyon> I don't know the world around me!
<Procyon> I'm scared, and confused!
<DS> have you felt a strong desire to vote for george w. bush recently?
#207696
<@nalle-> css <3
<@gatan> cs <3
<@exz_> c <3
#15733
<FlashMan> nethack is installed
<Jon2> An IRC chick stands in your path. She wears a +5 ring of decreased mental stability.
* sQurl kicks jon2
<sQurl> I AM STABLE GOD DAMN YOU
<sQurl> DON'T MAKE ME KILL YOU
<Jon2> The IRC chick attacks. She misses.
#310212
<Bike> When I imagine x86 I imagine a Swiss Family Robinson style treehouse, with parts continually bursting into flame underneath as they build higher and higher on the broken remnants of what they slapped together last week.
#33887
<I|O> goin off to college
<I|O> mom got me a dehumidifer
<I|O> dad got me a humidifier
<xiao> stick em in yer room for a night. let them fight it out
#31822
<@SLing> anyway I love grocery shopping because I get to make my family look like fools
<@SLing> the other day we were at the grocery store
<@SLing> and the first place was all the melons (like canteloupe, grapefruit, etc)
<evolsoulx> mmhmm
<@SLing> anyway I remembered hearing from some TV chef that before buying melons you're supposed to knock on them
<@SLing> so
<@SLing> I stood there
<@SLing> for five minutes
<@SLing> knocking on melons
<@SLing> people started looking at me strange
<evolsoulx> lol
<@SLing> I was like "It's ok, the TV chef told me to"
<Erik> lol
<@SLing> I'd knock on one and be like "This one sounds fresh"
<@SLing> long story short I don't have to go grocery shopping anymore
#57705
<apeiron> Chewie[]: all four of my grandparents died because of cancer
<incarnadine> YOU HAD 4 GRANDPARENTS!??!
<incarnadine> er... wait
<incarnadine> nevermind
#150929
<gavin|> wtf
<gavin|> I just realized that 2 years ago I paid for a 19" LCD but received a 17"
<gavin|> this is so odd
<gavin|> I'm looking into buying a new monitor
<gavin|> so I look at the current monitor I have
<gavin|> it's a 17"
<gavin|> then I look at my receipt from 2 years ago when I bought it
<gavin|> supposed to be a 19"
<gavin|> I... feel dumb
#14130
* fuzzy-lumpkinz was kicked by Soul|Reaver (Soul|Reaver)
<eX|remix-> soul why u ban fuzzy?
<eX|remix-> he has a hot sister
#16588
<tipz> just remember kids
<tipz> hippos eat strawberry ice cream
<thadood> I'll keep that in mind next time I visit your mom.
#28294
<WillaCuz> *sigh*
<WillaCuz> why do people shoot at robocop
#19976
<Technogeek> I've had to akick Bruce five times now.
<Technogeek> I feel like I'm playing whack-a-mole over IRC.
#27192
<Cyric--> Aaaaaaaaaaaaaanyway. I'm not about to divulge in any late night homo erotics with you bunch of lifeless retards. I bid you farewell.
<Cyric--> FUCK
<Cyric--> cat was sick on my bed
#239876
< Tyr> wow... epic story from my boss
< Tyr> so, i sent him an email letting him know i'm selling a laptop to see if the company might want to buy it
< Tyr> or if he might know anyone else
< Tyr> turns out he does
< Tyr> see, he has this friend that's notorious for sleepwalking and peeing in random places
< Tyr> he apparently got up and peed on his laptop this weekend
< loodWork> I guess when he woke up...
< loodWork> *puts on sunglasses* ...he was really pissed off...
< loodWork> YYYYYEEEEEAAAAAAAHHHHHHH
#6849
<cmw> ok how about this one
<cmw> Dear Natalie,
<cmw> How's it going studying at Harvard? I bet it's hard. I am sorry my sweet but sometimes life is hard. I love you. You are so beautiful and smart my darling. God made you so perfect. Will you marry me? We could be so happy together, forever. We have so much in common, you are in Star Wars and I like Star Wars. Can't you see we were made for each other.
<cmw> Yours Always,
<cmw> Cody Crenshaw
<ShadowFang11> yea, thats good
#36900
<rhyno> okay
<rhyno> I must be losing my mind
<rhyno> I just walked to the PJ station
<rhyno> because I can't find my car keys
<rhyno> and they were right fucking here an hour ago
<DaemonX> pj station?
<rhyno> yeah
<rhyno> gas station
<rhyno> but the thing was
<rhyno> I was going there to get gas
<DaemonX> without your car?
<rhyno> and I couldn't find my keys
<rhyno> so I just thought "I'll walk"
<rhyno> go all the way up there.. and I'm like "wtf was I going here for.."
<rhyno> "OH YEAH! DUMBASS!"
<rhyno> then walked back
<DaemonX> ... i can't even comment on that
#16566
<jenn> BUKKAKE!
<DogBoy> ouch
<Asmodean> bukkake? isn't that the japanese rope tying fetish?
<DogBoy> no
<prefect> you're so young and innocent, asmodean
<DogBoy> lol
<Asmodean> young.. maybe.. innocent.. no :)
<DogBoy> hmm
<DogBoy> I can't even spell that
<DogBoy> I'm gonna ask my mom what it means
<Asmodean> bukkake?
<Asmodean> oh my
<Asmodean> hitting "i am feeling lucky" in google for bukkake was umm.. *sooo* not work friendly