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#307282
<&Tiggerz> i wish i could go trick-or-treating again
<&Bakamoichigei> Grab some kid off the street and tell them you'll give them a halloween costume and take them trick or treating if they split the candy with you.
<&Bakamoichigei> There's an alternate, more legal, version of this plan...but it takes like 6 years.
#25060
<timmo> you know this will be one of those things
<timmo> where when i die st. peter or whoever
<timmo> is looking over my sins and what not
<timmo> "so you told chris to, and i quote 'knock the bottom out of it and make sure she cant walk right tomorrow'?"
<timmo> "nah man it wasnt like that"
<arse-poet> and then he will show you the irc long
Comment: #geekissues
#45437
<Drew> next to that one i found funny is the barcode reader at Regal (movie theater)
<Drew> it had a warning
<Drew> do not look into laser
<Drew> it had it in braille too
Comment: #cam, irc.drivemeinsane.com
#298575
<mathrick> so there's this song, right, that goes "all I want to do is make love to you"
<mathrick> this is a classic case of an inexperienced / bad coder using unnecessarily verbose and inefficient expressions in a misguided attempt to make things more readable
<mathrick> compare the idiomatic version: "all I want to do is you". Shorter, more readable AND more to the point
<mathrick> remember, kids, not using idiomatic expressions and commenting on obvious parts of the code will get you to the special code hell
#412
<mogo-> my middle school got a blue ribbon for acheivement...
<natural> my school got a rainbow ribbon for homosexuality
#32461
<D-viant> my gf told me not ot get her a valentines present
<D-viant> that means I have to get her one
<D-viant> and shes not getting me one
<D-viant> :(
#33362
[ DanoF ) i think my monitor broke
[ DanoF ) what happens when the tube dies
[+shea ) lots of things
*** solerad [sole@216.85.31.178] has joined #quickbasic
[ DanoF ) mine turned purple
[ DanoF ) now it wont come on
[ solerad ) :|
[ solerad ) what
[ solerad ) penis?
[ DanoF ) hey didnt see that coming
[ solerad ) i pride myself in being original and spontaneous
[ DanoF ) then my sarcastic comments must cut deeply
[ solerad ) yes
#42581
SurrenderUrCow: in my 3rd period
SurrenderUrCow: i stuck a pencil down my pants
Micycle 13: LOL wtf
Micycle 13: why?
SurrenderUrCow: and made it look like i had a massive boner
Micycle 13: ROFL
SurrenderUrCow: then i stood up and walked over to my teacher
Micycle 13: so somebody says "hahah look at k0w poppin a b to the teacher"
SurrenderUrCow: handed her my planner and said as loud as i can, "I HAVE TO GOTO THE BATHROOM!"
Micycle 13: ROFL
SurrenderUrCow: it was so fucking hilarious, the teacher looked up and fell out of her chair
#9209
<Disco`Stu> fat girls need loving too
<kodos> someone has to take one for the team
<kodos> i vote its luke
<lukeiyo-e> damn you fuckers
<lukeiyo-e> alright.. someone pass me a torch
#12299
<Chern> IM SO FUCKIN BORED!
* Reaper is now known as Reaper[HAVINGFUN]
* BongB is now known as Bong[NOTBORED]
* Chissy is now known as Chiss[FUNFUNFUN]
* brod is now known as brod[IMNOTBORED]
<Chern> FUCK!!!!!!
#29524
<wang^> man white girls go for $150 grand a head
<wang^> in saudi arabia
* wang^ thinks
<psykoz> man i need to sell my gf then
<wang^> no kidding!
<wang^> 150 grand!
<wang^> you spin me right round
<psykoz> man with 150g's i can buy me a cheapie ferrari
<amoeba> with $150K i can buy me plenty cheap hookers and export them to saudi arabia
#29355
<soylent> Chemical Ali captured
<soylent> i thought they had killed him
<clay> they killed him three times
<clay> he committed suicide once or twice
<clay> He is the king of spades and No. 5 in the deck of cards issued by the military of the 55 most-wanted Iraqis.
<clay> there are 52 cards in a deck
<clay> plus two jokers i guess
<clay> whats the other one
<clay> the little card that tells you how to play two card games
<clay> i wonder who got stuck with that winner
<clay> probably the guy who brought saddam his morning slippers
#41997
<Ace_Reaper> ..i don't think god really will be happy with you burning the churchs
<Ste> He destroys them in floods and stuff all the time
<Ace_Reaper> yes but see thats HIM doing it
<Ace_Reaper> its like playing Simcity
<Ace_Reaper> you don't mind setting a hurricane on your city
<Ace_Reaper> but your pissed if one comes along naturally
#34477
<umopepisdn> About a month ago one of my tires popped.
<umopepisdn> I ended up cutting about half of the tire off of the rim with a pair of scissors because I didn't know what to do.
<umopepisdn> Then I realized that the spare tire has got a rim on it.
Comment: Ah yes... nerds and cars =)
#1331
<felix> that raid card is gonna saturate that machine
<felix> that's like giving a chihuahua a fire hydrant enema.
#59744
<Knightmare> Well that was a night of fear and terror.
<Timork> ?
<Knightmare> I bought a bag of mushrooms and a bottle of Everclear.
<Knightmare> Settled down for a nice evening of mind altering psychadelia
<Timork> Bad trip huh?
<Knightmare> Horrible, I never want to go through it again.
<Knightmare> Somewhere along the line I installed emacs.
#30792
«%Jeeba» One time my dad made me close my eyes and suck some mollasses out of a hose, Still dont know why though.
#40333
<+HauntedUnix> Heard there's been an open-source explosion in Florida...
<+Nimbus> Oh?
<+HauntedUnix> Well no one there has Windows anymore..
#31919
<^NoS^Sikarian> you know
<^NoS^Sikarian> in working with the tech department the past week
<^NoS^Sikarian> know what ive found out?
<^NoS^Sikarian> those windows XP taskbar tray popup bubbles are like a little kid
<^NoS^Sikarian> 'HEY! LOoK AT ME! LOOOK WHAT IM DOING! =D =D =D LOoK!! YOUR NOT LOOOOKKINNGG!!!! COME ON LOOK!!"
<^NoS^Sikarian> Then you click the X and say "Ok I fucking see you"
<^NoS^Sikarian> 5 seconds... "HEY LOOK AT ME AGAIN! =D"
#14449
<@harb> Sith are like the script kiddies of Force users.
<@harb> They all have silly handles.
<@harb> "Darth Maul", "Darth Sidious", "Darth Tyranous".
<@harb> "d00d ur most l33t l3tz g0 own sum j3di lol"
< mdxi> <ObiWan> Do not turn ot the Dark Side, Anakin
< mdxi> <an4k1n> STFU F4G
<@harb> <tyr4nous> d00d j0in m3 w3 c4n pwn 2gether!!
<@harb> <ObiWan> I'll never join you, Dooku.
<@harb> <tyr4nous> suk
#29407
<Synlor> want jesus to rise from the grave and rape me
<Synlor> twice
<TiTaN> STFU faggot.
<Synlor> dont be all jealous just cause our savior thinks im hot and youre not
#8586
<rg> my f key got fucked once
<rg> i tried to tell people to use the shift key and all hell broke loose
#182
<Infe5> A PS2 costs ?40,000, a PSOne costs ?15,000, and a Hello Kitty DC costs ?28,800. :(
<EtherMan> how much is that in real money
#311372
phobos: Windows gave a BSOD while installing the nvidia-drivers, so I blew it away and installed Linux.
Silver_Fox: Sure. I rebuild the house too when the fridge fails.
phobos: If the house were designed and built by Microsoft, you'd have to.
#45221
<Lost> wow this is so retarted
<Lost> my main computer
<Lost> needs a new video card
<Tenor> ? Lost
<Lost> flys got inside my computer and cloged everything up
<Lost> like
<Lost> tons of them
<Tenor> how the fuck did that happen
<Lost> and burnt out my video card
<Lost> I have no screen on my window
<Lost> and I have LED lights
<Lost> so I guess they go near the LED fan
<Lost> and get sucked in