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#18
<TOZTWO> I was kinda shy, and still am, so right after sex, I started getting dressed before she could turn on the lights......
<TOZTWO> Well, she turns the light on, and I have my clothes on already, and she can't find her undies.......
<TOZTWO> But she finds my undies next to the bed.
<TOZTWO> Guess whose undies I'm wearing?
#297777
<jimmiejaz> Doctors in Singapore say the virus that causes severe acute respiratory syndrome (SARS) is present in the tears of patients with the disease.
<syberghost> Cry me a fever.
#19782
<HardKase> i work for an isp , there is no "lets piss off the customers" button
<HardKase> ive looked for it
<||Rune||> we dont have a button
<||Rune||> we have to do it manually
#6459
<Bobo> what's wrong with being a homosexual?
<klong> it's gay
#44241
Dan> So here are two pyros comparing burn stories.. is this like the proverbial whipping out of the cocks, except for pyros?
*time lapse*
Jace> in chemistry class we were using bunsen burners, i took out a penny and decided to melt it
Dan> SWEET ASS
Jace> it was very sweet until i decided to cool it down in a beaker of what i thought was water
Dan> ..oh fuck
Jace> i mean the penny was melted...and i dumped it into a beaker of HCl
Dan> OH FUCK AND A HALF.
Jace> not only did it make a loud enough noise cooling itself down and getting everyones attention, but because of the heat change, and the fact that it was HCl, the beaker broke, spilling HCl, now hot because of the penny, all over. So it started eating away the table and floor and my lab coat.
Dan> Somehow I think your cock is bigger than mine.
Comment: Ooh, fire.
#54696
<joe`> I got overpaid $150 two weeks ago, i decided not to say anything
<joe`> now last week they UNDERPAID me $150, so I went to my manager to tell him to put it right and he comes out with "you didn't tell us when we overpaid you, did you"?
<joe`> I told him "I'll tolerate one mistake, but not two!"
#300781
s42: I was ranting with my friend about how nonsensical it is for so many people to play Farmville on Facebook... how growing imaginary crops is a waste of time when there's no real goal.
s42: When I realized I play MMORPGS...
s42: I probably do more farming on the internet than fucking farmers do in real life.
#27763
HermitKing: So Star Trek fans are Trekkies, and X-files fans are X-philes...
HermitKing: ...what do you call Buffy fans?
Cat1013: Virgins
#13664
<Mack_Salmon> do you ever listen to Meat Loaf?
<Flirbnic> No.
<Mack_Salmon> he's food....
<Mack_Salmon> er!
<Mack_Salmon> he's good
<Mack_Salmon> whoops
#2495
<CompGod> If crime doesn't pay, is my job illegal?
#20525
<Gerrard> Theres some sort of militant feminist movement going on in my ceramics class
#7890
<Fodz> I AM JUST NOT APPRECIATED AROUND HERE
<rabbitfood> not for your brains fods, just your arse. :)
#3230
<NtG> you know theres one thing I love about the internet
<NtG> theres such a multitude of repulsive fat ugly chick pictures
#33811
<motolov> she sure looks like a crazy gal
<motolov> crazy about mcdonalds
#36173
<kpt> any Java coders in the house? I have a question about recursion
<danamania> kpt: ask kpt when she gets back in
#14662
<Funk> I need money fast.
<wildkarrdex> ok I have an idea
<Funk> What?
<wildkarrdex> well you send me £100 by cheque
<Funk> And then?
<wildkarrdex> and then what?
#52003
<Sp3cial> well ok, shitty computer, I'd better not bump the desk or you might start making heaps of noise.
<Sp3cial> an smell like smoke...
<Sp3cial> HOLY FUCK SHIT FUCK
<Sp3cial> OH DEAR GOD FIRE SHIT
#20950
* strang3r licks eZ_T4B's ass
* strang3r kicks eZ_T4B's ass
<strang3r> u know they really shouldnt put the "l" right beside the "k"
#2542
<PolestaR> what the hell is a segway
<Marudek> we already have electric wheel chairs
<PolestaR> how fast is it?
<DooD> about 15 mph
<PolestaR> pfft
<PolestaR> i can have sex quicker then that
#8502
<Doc> hmm.. AOL has this great new thing where you can chat with your friends online!
<Bru> yeah I saw the ad on TV. that would be cool - then I wouldn't have to chat with this bunch of losers and social misfits
#785
(|Chris) bang her and change your phone number
#17152
<sacarna> jay z - it's a hard knock life (ghetto anthem).mp3
<sacarna> otherwise its just a song from annie.
<JtHM> heh.. hardcore rappers mackin out to samples from an old musical full of 10 year old white girls.
<JtHM> seems more like R Kellys scene
#60310
<DarkArchon> She told me we couldn't afford beer anymore and I'd have to quit
<DarkArchon> Then I caught her spending $65.00 on make-up.
<DarkArchon> I asked how come I had to give up stuff and she didn't.
<DarkArchon> She said she needed the make-up to look pretty for me.
<DarkArchon> I told her that was what the beer was for.
<DarkArchon> I don't think she's coming back....
Comment: irc.archspace.org 6666 #archspace
#206512
<zaapiel> mplayer palestinian_girls_go_jihad_on_jewish_cock.avi
<zaapiel> doh wrong term
#300740
<Brian> Hey hey, want to apply for a job at my work?
<Jeremy> Sure, I guess :) What would they need from me?
<Brian> A resume, cover letter, employment history, maybe urine
<Jeremy> I'm guessing they don't want me to mail that last one in :-D
<Brian> No, the last one is for my personal enjoyment.