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#71165
<Yahovah> bsmntbombdood: I have a new nickname for you. Captain Oblivious.
<bsmntbombdood> I don't get it
<Yahovah> Exactly.

#29637
<Auri> Trojan, Durex, Lifestyles, those are the best brands.
<iganokage> we only have durex from those 3
<[TFCC]Captain_W0nder> I'll send you an unopened package of Lifestyles iga.
<iganokage> lol
<iganokage> no seriously, im fine :)
<iganokage> "hey sunny, capt sent me condoms from texas, wanna try em out?"
<iganokage> "O_O"
<[TFCC]Captain_W0nder> that'll work
<[TFCC]Captain_W0nder> just think of me when you're doing it\
* [TFCC]Captain_W0nder runs

#52718
<HypnoGenX> I know about as much about mobile phones as I do about girls.
<HypnoGenX> They're both noisy and frightening, yet they make me want to touch them.

#84
<matt> too bad her head looks like an ass
<scv> thats makes blowjobs better, matt

#280685
<purriah> She knows you're wanking.
<Foxhill[away]> of course she does, she still washes the sheets
<Foxhill[away]> i remember her saying that to me one day when picking me up from school
<Foxhill[away]> 'you're a dirty lil boy'
<Foxhill[away]> 'huh? what?'
<Foxhill[away]> 'i wash your sheets remember'
<Foxhill[away]> 'err'
<Foxhill[away]> 'no more watching the german channel'

#214202
<Lightning> my mom and dad put a pw on all my games and stuff except for irc
<Shrink> You could always try and brute force it
<Lightning> i'm not gonna hit a couple of elderly people!!

#53055
<m[a]cky> I wish my lawn was emo, so it would cut itself.

#16807
<mptBreak> hyatt, what are you doing?
<hyatt> mpt, sitting here in my underwear talking to you.

#7842
<Sandman> You know something? Burning hair reeks.
<Zibblsnrt> I think that's nature's way of telling you, "Don't set your hair on fire, dipshit!"

#2354
(nexxai) you don't know pain until you try and compile eggdrop on a 486
(nexxai) each line goes by, and you cheer because you weren't sure if it had frozen or not D;

#21456
<@hugh|boredstupid> my mind was lagged
<@Andrew|busy> I hate when that happens
<@Andrew|busy> you're like "fkin reconnect. hurry up dammit- I'm probably saying something stupid"

#60255
< larsivi> heh, I talked to this sysadmin once who wondered where all the printers in his network came from ... it turned out his search script started at 10.226.0.69, and ended at .68, making him search the whole internet for unsecured printers ...
< larsivi> the search had taken 21 days ...
Comment: #d @ freenode

#50229
(NES) I'm thinkg we should buy the condoms in bulk from costco
(Emmers) I won't need any *grins*
(NES) you're good at pulling out?
(Emmers) I'm a girl.
(NES) wtf

#44151
<Alkaline2k> i have no soul after goatse
<Alkaline2k> it's like a black abyss that sucks in all joy
<Alkaline2k> and then it just ruins my day when i have to reach in there and take it back out

#5078
<joey``> ryan...what are you doing for new year's
<ryano> going on dalnet

#1375
[Fustard] I just walked out into the living room today
[Fustard] and my mom just randomly went
[Fustard] 'the dog has been masturbating too much, ive never seen it that big'

#16008
<eX|chika|afk> BTW how was Singapore ?
<eX|chika|afk> get any cool shit while u were over there, like HIV or Herpies ?

#8708
<DW-Steve> i'm a hacker
<mystican> no you're not
<mystican> you're a farmer
<mystican> theres a difference

#1180
<yaragn> ever seen that movie? The Matrix?
<yaragn> with those green lines of flying text?
<yaragn> *THAT'S* Perl

#9128
(Striker): 42 is the answer to the biggest question
(Smoke): what question

#296768
< gloone_> how i fucking wish that i would walk by a coughing cop today
< gloone_> and just fucking panic and point and yell "SWINE FLU!!!!!!!!!!!"
< gloone_> (and then get my ass kicked :()

#10926
<Macca_> hi all
<Macca_>  can anyone help me with uninstalling WindowsME, it hasn't been as
easy as i thought it might be

#301941
<ShadeS> r4v5: know much about turntables?
<r4v5> not *much*
<r4v5> i put an album on it and then move the arm over?
<r4v5> and jazz comes out?
<r4v5> but yeah, the main things i know are things like "if you take a 12" trance single and play it back at 33, it becomes a chillout single of longer length"
<myself248> bwaahahaha
<r4v5> you're laughing but it was pretty fucking amazing. Friend has crates full of techno; I was like "can I spin some?"
<r4v5> First one I grabbed was full of obnoxious high squeaks. switched to 33 and it was fat acid sounds.

#270887
<Betty> So, wanna go see a movie tomorrow
<Sokol> NO! I toled you, i haev a girlfriend!!!
<Betty> I AM YOUR GIRLFRIEND YOU STONED FUCK!!!

#41975
<CXI> shit, I was great at minesweeper
<CXI> I should've been in nam
Comment: #geekissues

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