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#25136
(jmd_) %lb chameleo
(jmd_) dead bot?
(@seymour) read the topic. we moved.
(jmd_) oh, goody
(jmd_) so long efnet, and thanks for all the splits
#31528
<Cazor> i know a girl who thinks a guy doing his own laundry is a turn on. thats... hrmm...
<Cazor> and she freaks out when i go to my laundry
<GreenJeanz> wtf haha
<Cazor> like, an orgasmic freak out
<Ruthven> sounds good
<Jovan> Cazor: Sounds like an opportunity... :D
<Jovan> Just kidding.
<Cazor> ehhh... nope.
<Ruthven> ¬_¬
<Jovan> That's kinda funny though.
<Cazor> you'd laugh if i told you who it was, though.
<kak> Its ok Cazor, we know its your mom.
#49831
<kb> o
<kb> ^circle
<ppo> wow you have a very steady hand
<kb> thanks
<kb> i've been practicing
#56643
<b0b> fucking hell dude
<b0b> i hate when the salsa in the jar gets low
<b0b> and I try to get it out with a chip and it gets all of my fingers
<b0b> and i just end up crying myself to sleep with my fingers covered in salsa
#52969
syuu: still looking for a job?
reima: yeah. no luck so far.
syuu: here. try this one. Dec-20 Fun Fabulous Bookkeeper Wanted (downtown / civic / van ness) <<accounting/finance
reima: what?! 18 to 20 bucks an hour for bookkeeper? Not bad.
reima: wait, it's says "Gay/Lesbian/Bisexual/Transgender community"
reima: you asshole.
reima: .....
reima: .......
reima: 20 bucks an hour, right?
syuu: I can't believe you're contemplating this.
Comment: *job hunting at craigslist*
#6749
<josh> I was on this conf one time and they were doing 3way calling to prank call grocery stores, and this chick would ask if they had keilbasa, then ask if it would be good for 'experimenting" with
<josh> this one guy was like "yeah, it'd work good for that"
#31723
<pads> He'll be back. They always come back. IRC is the only thign harder to give up that heroin injected from a nicotine filled syringe.
#16977
<Uzzie> i'm sueing herbal essences
<Uzzie> i didn't get orgasms
#532
<kisama> i've spent my last 5 new year's on either irc or aol
#65178
<dsfargeg> right, I don't even know how to start this calculus question :(
<cjr> I've got a phd on mathematics
<dsfargeg> really?? what do you do now?
<cjr> ?
<cjr> ohhh, i meant a .pdf
<dsfargeg> fuck you
#297184
<roxylucy> omg did i tell you what embarrassing thing happened to me the other day?
<hedgab> not that i know of
<roxylucy> ok. well, i was visiting my friend in the hospital
<hedgab> yeah
<roxylucy> and so i was leaving
<roxylucy> but in the next room, i noticed a man covered in machinery, shivering.
<roxylucy> and i thought that was sad, so i pulled the blanket up for him
<roxylucy> and, with his breathing mask on, says, "can you see if my testicles are black"
<hedgab> omg really?
<roxylucy> i tried to decline, but he looked so frail and desperate
<roxylucy> so i checked to make sure no one was looking
<roxylucy> and i looked at it and it was just fine
<hedgab> haha ok
<roxylucy> so i was like, "nope, none of it is black"
<roxylucy> and he takes off his mask and says, "can you see if my test results are back"
#1058
<Chis> Away message on AIM: I am away from my computer right now. ( I final gotten my cable modem!!)
#13726
<Sumez> I must admit having two functional penises must have it advantages
<Darth-Phenom> You could fuck a woman and piss at the same time?
<Yolkhead> Would you really want to pee while having sex?
<Sumez> You miss to see the opportunities
#5028
<myles> i jus wanna go to court and b on the plantiff side for once
#50267
<Klassh> strange, my left hand is warm, but my right hand is cold..
<killjoy> take left hand out of pants.
<killjoy> put right hand in pants.
#33192
<sarah9991> what's up?
<mindstorms> the nation's average cholesterol count?
#45224
nbody2002:If you can read this you may be addicted to the internet
#104149
<@bob> i usually go with my friend steph, who i have known since before she had boobs and we even knew what boobs were.
<@bob> who, long story short
<@bob> told me
<@bob> she is not my best friend anymore :p
<@bob> cd best-friend; patch -p1 < upgrade-to-girlfriend.diff
#34158
<Clutch> Anyone else notice that 'strap on' spelt backwards is 'no parts'?
Comment: #gaming - gaming.windfyre.net - Feel thy spiff fool
#20275
<dsbnh> man... mailorderbride.com leads to nothing
<[GSF]Tomato> I should register that
<dsbnh> they have mailorderbrides though
<dsbnh> so its giving me the option to browse ladies 18 to 98, i think i'll narrow
<dsbnh> to like... 90 98
<dsbnh> the way i figure i can get the sexor but they will be dead soon after
<dsbnh> perfect match
<dsbnh> ZERO RECORDS
<dsbnh> nooooooooooooooooooo
#310556
<meeb> only windows laptop in the flat is currently updating itself (forced reboot)
<meeb> it's installing update.... 14 of 3
<meeb> and is on 824%
<Erasmus> meeb, think of how super up to date that laptop will be
#425
* Mootar is away, watching porn [Pants:OFF] [Hands:ON]
#6552
* dagbrown *FINALLY* got licenses for his fucking Sun development environments.
<dagbrown> Sun's licensing department must have the slogan "WE HATE YOU AND WANT YOU TO DIE"
#140546
<Johnny> has there been a zombie tv series?
<Luigi30> the osbournes
#7855
<octo> no matter what anyone tells you, or how much you think it would be a good idea, never ever put aftershave on your balls
<HeXeDeCiMaL> OMG 0 ...
<Angelhair> curiosity will get you every time
<Ninja_Bill> as far as i know curiosity didnt make a cat put aftershave on its nuts