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#346
<ethiopia> i'm starving
#48288
<Sargasm> It must be a bitch to write your name in the snow in Arabic
#129406
<@matt-o-rama> i told somebody on youtube to "euthanize yourself"
<@matt-o-rama> they reply "that only works for dogs, stupid"
#24171
<[6thAB]Barnes> I wasn't masturbating!
<[6thAB]Barnes> I was just cleaning it and it when off!!!
#11876
<[BDT]Karma> put the chicken mushroom [ramen] outside
<[BDT]Karma> and wait with a club
<[BDT]Karma> maybe a squirrel will come by
<[BDT]Karma> and you will have food for another day
#150929
<gavin|> wtf
<gavin|> I just realized that 2 years ago I paid for a 19" LCD but received a 17"
<gavin|> this is so odd
<gavin|> I'm looking into buying a new monitor
<gavin|> so I look at the current monitor I have
<gavin|> it's a 17"
<gavin|> then I look at my receipt from 2 years ago when I bought it
<gavin|> supposed to be a 19"
<gavin|> I... feel dumb
#30362
<@Drag-oN> twinkie? oO
<@Zeromecha> Twinkie, the only food tough enough to survive a nucular blast
<@Drag-oN> it contains roaches? OO
#309167
<bob> how does Pandora not have an xbox app.
<jmather> bob: because it's not pandora's box
#300090
<cpltn> how should i calculate if i got a picture that is 26530 x 8923 and i want to scale it down proportionally?
<OnErr0r> um.. math?
#28917
<^Ocean^> fucking bloody hell
<^Ocean^> I lost 33gig of HDSpace
<LlNK> lol
<LlNK> check under your keyboard
#193445
<@pomo|wii> So, funny story. I don't know if it's true or not, but according to my public speaking professor, it is.
<@pomo|wii> So, a few people decide to throw a party and decide to inflate a few blow-up dolls with helium to have floating around the house.
<@pomo|wii> Now, everything's going well, until apparently some of these dolls escape into the night sky via an open door/window/something
<@pomo|wii> According to what he told us, a woman a few blocks down saw these dolls and thought that the rapture was occuring, and people were floating away into heaven
<@pomo|wii> so this woman RUNS INTO THE STREET, screaming to be taken with them, only to be hit and killed by a car
#20253
(syanide): whats a hacking master?
(DownKaos-): syanide: it's one of those guys who drinks a lot of red bull and jerks off to animated porn in his star trek suit
#250200
<SirPNut> look, given the choice between turning off the internet router, and turning off the life support machine for a loved one.. who here wouldn't choose to leave the router plugged in ?
<+Marticus> SirPNut: you just said the same thing twice, i dont understand
Comment: #peeringsa
#62999
<pr3d4t0r> loke__: I long for the days when Mexico had electoral fraud, Russia lacked freedom, and the US was a beacon of hope instead of the other way around.
#2680
~ frOsty- giggles.. in a manly, tesrosterone-filled sort of way.
#37249
<toku-sama> pagefault calls his father "sperm"
<toku-sama> and his mom "egg"
<pagefault> toku calls his parents test tube and eye dropper
#31162
<nomad> then my comp teacher said, "someone sterilized a mouse, the ball is missing"
#53595
<nsasch> My grandfather was on the team that invented FORTRAN
<nsasch> My brother's an artist.
<nsasch> My father's a program.
<saracen> But, does he run on linux?
Comment: irc.vaccus.com @ #main
#9178
<lovemebaybee'> hey guys asl?
<rafeil> she just wants to be loved, look at her screen name
<helminthes> so stick it to her.. a sharp knife that is
#243532
stephen: i win bitch
reese: i was lagging
stephen: wtf
reese: yeah dude total lag
stephen: we were playing chess...
#227397
newts: This VIP branch is complaining that it's network connections seem to be down ATM.
newts: We failed them to the backup systems which are also not responding.
newts: We failed them to the tertiary systems (they're VIP).
newts: Suddenly it's mentioned that they're in the middle of a hurricane.
newts: Huh.
newts: Wonder if that could be the problem.
#230434
<MajorWood> fack
<MajorWood> i just clogged the toilet
<MajorWood> had to put on a latex glove to manually unplug
<LiquidManZero> You fisted your toilet...?
#21675
<Lauren> I ROX0RS JO0 NEWBIE!
<GravitonSurge> why don't you CHOKE YOURSELF WITH THE CORDS. WHY DO YOU COME HERE. NOBODY LIKES YOU, NOBODY TALKS TO YOU, 3/4 OF THE PEOPLE HERE DON'T EVEN KNOW YOU
<GravitonSurge> just a thought
#270018
<Steve_Restless> "Yer drive is dead. send it to HP"
<Raiden> Better is 'Your drive is dead. It dropped below zero HP'
Comment: #Chaos_GardenRPG, espernet
#24637
<eval> multiple personality disorder
<MudBlud> oh, i have that
<MudBlud> so do i