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#663
<hypr> digdug: i bet you have your beeper auto go off when somebody adds a quote cause your a supernerd
#55755
<GenericLoser> I know someone who wears the Apple-white earbud headphones, but doesn't actually have an iPod, nor any MP3 player, or even a CD player. He just puts the other end in his pocket and everyone assumes he does.
#18865
<Demosthenes> one of the members of n'sync is going up in a russian rocket and visiting the space station?
<Demosthenes> if aliens come and find him out there, they'll blow up our planet for sure.
<Captain Scurv> heh
<Captain Scurv> hopefully just the station
<Demosthenes> naw, there would still be 4 nsync members on the surface.
<Demosthenes> they'd have to take out the whole planet to be safe.
#36405
<AdamR78> i told the headteacher i'm a ladyboy :|
<AdamR78> i meant to say, i'm a chelsea boy, lady
<AdamR78> and instead i said i'm a chelsea ladyboy
#6267
<nhoj> dont dis on aol
<nhoj> they put the whole internet on a cd
#61602
<Apophis> I think I need to trim my toenails.
<Apophis> either that or I'm a special kind of idiot
<Apophis> or both
<Apophis> my hand is bleeding from an 'unfortunate sock putting-on injury'
#35719
<menno> damnit
<menno> nvidia mousemat broke my table :(
<DEATH> wtf?
<menno> yeah, it was one of those selfsucking mousemats
<menno> when I tried to pull it off it took half of the table with it
#443
<VicViper> dorm = jail cell with internet
<SYch0> w/ fast internet
#15614
<GaRlic> how you like my new name?
<drunkers> it stinks
#14250
* <r0b3r> sighs and ponders what to do now....
* <Lynda> ponders, "draw something?"
<r0b3r> Tried that already. Can't think of anything to draw, really.
<Lynda> draw... a couple, resting in bed together.
* <r0b3r> blinks at what Lynda says....
<r0b3r> No. I don't draw that, thank you ery much.
<Lynda> I wasn't suggesting anything ecchi.
<Lynda> I take it you've never had a really serious relationship.
<r0b3r> I have one with someone right now, actually.
<r0b3r> Just it's an odd relationship considering my character is human
and she is an alien...
#31500
<Goonie> earthquakes are a good thing tho
<Goonie> it selectively removes old buildings and historical buildings so that new ones that are better can be built
<Goonie> natural selection for buildings
<Goonie> and then other buildings get demoted to historical and the cycle repeats
#3502
<Butters> this girl I'm talking to on AIM just tried out her new "pink panther"
<chowda> Butters: I'm sure "she" did :)
#111790
<maherarar> I PRESSED CAPS LOCK ONCE IN 1989 AND I NEVER LOOKED BACK.
#3118
<Orange1> why won't openbsd recognize my usb floppy drive?
<Orange1> it starts booting, but then can't find itself
#7535
<orb06> something red and semi-opaque
<orb06> said it was "stool softener"
<orb06> Im like wtf
<orb06> I like my stool hard, ma'am
<orb06> and left without it
<orb06> no pain no gain
<orb06> thats what I say
#61
<Guilty> Really, celerons make me laugh
<Guilty> The white trash chip
#159419
ruide: hey chris, stop fuckin cybering and let me show you something
cyph33r: what
cyph33r: i dont cyber cockbite, i have a gf
ruide: haha
cyph33r: what did you want to show me
ruide: i made an account on that scrabble website you go to
ruide: bubblegal_14
cyph33r: wtf
cyph33r: omg fuck you you fucking prick
ruide: chrisharker: i slide two fingers into your tight asshole
cyph33r: YOU ARE A FUCKING FAGGOT YOU KNOW THAT
cyph33r: I FUCKING HATE YOU
ruide: chrisharker: i've never done this before, am i doing it right?
cyph33r: FUCK OFF YOU FUCKING ASSHOLE
#301550
<ryg> some architectures seriously make you want to staple your palm to your face to save yourself a lot of effort
#300288
<c|oneman> did you ever meet this person that was so cheerful
<c|oneman> you've said to yourself
<c|oneman> I think this person would maintain the same face even when being fisted anally
<Urz> I don't believe I've ever thought those same words, no
#4790
<DAL9000> my pseudogirlfriend's preacher was like, all over her
<DAL9000> and she's not very liked at her church
<DAL9000> cuz they think she's seducing him
<trep> pseudogirlfriend, haha
<DAL9000> yes
<DAL9000> that's a fancy word for stalking interest.
#26311
<FunG¦away> and i dont dress quite like the other boys
<Logic_BomB> "what are you wearing?" "a kilt" "no man thats a skirt.." "its a kilt im telling you..." "uhhh its pink, has flowers and shoulder straps" "its a prety kilt"
#150313
<fugi> when mccain wins the election and invades iran, do we get to yell "Monopoly!" and put hotels across iraq, iran and afghanistan?
#3526
<Korben> tits
<darkraZor> yes, tits
<Soopa> i agree
<darkraZor> ...indeed
#33829
<FHCI_SS> I work as a tech support and someone called yesterday with the following conversation taking place
<FHCI_SS> Customer: "Hi, I was wondering if you could fix my laptop. It's under warranty."
<FHCI_SS> Me: "What seems to be the trouble with it?"
<FHCI_SS> Customer: "My wife got mad and threw it in the pool."
#2732
<im3t8> my last nightmare was of my computer trying to kill me
<Apathetic> really?
<im3t8> but in the end it was just the mouse
<Apathetic> maybe that's metaphoric for something
<Apathetic> :/
<im3t8> its a microsoft mouse
<im3t8> :/