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#42637
<Hay> OMG today in biology
<Hay> i was looking through my biology book
<Hay> and it had a BIG picture of 2 Blue Footed Boobies (birds)
<Hay> and i showed the teacher and said "Aren't those a nice pair of boobies?"

#29525
<wwmrtww> great, lab partner calls me this morning
<wwmrtww> to tell me hes not going to be in class
<wwmrtww> cause hes going to the doctor about his drug problem :/
<wwmrtww> i KNEW that guy was tweaking in class one day
<wwmrtww> hell the whole class noticed

#297836
B9|work: Nothing inanimate is so important that it can't be left behind because you don't feel like making another trip.
***girasquid doesn't own many animate things
***B9|work has 2 kids and a dog.  They are very animated.  I can't leave them behind.  It's not legal. :D
***girasquid has a roomba
B9|work: oooh

#3532
<blazemore> indian, asian.. same difference, they both end with "ian"

#25608
<Drugdown> I believe when you die its just like before you were born.
<Drugdown> ...nothingness.
<Fleebis> Like when you empty your recycle bin!

#50571
<GenericLoser> We recieved our Red Ribbon Week wristbands yesterday.
<GenericLoser> (Red Ribbon Week has long past.)
<GenericLoser> Our instructor said, "You should probably wear these anyway."
<GenericLoser> Making a joke, I replied, "Yeah, just because Red Ribbon Weeks is over, that doesn't mean you can start doing drugs again."
<GenericLoser> And our instructor replies, very serious, "Yeah, my goal is to stay off for a month."

#53153
<+Durandal> you said you'd be right back
<+r0bin> yeah
<+r0bin> An hour an ten minutes is "right"
<+Durandal> ah
<+r0bin> Espescially since my average "bbl" is three to four months
<+Durandal> heh, that's for damn sure
<+r0bin> :P
<+Durandal> of course i've been known to disappear for a year
<+Durandal> or more
<@kefx> r0bin: haha
<+r0bin> Durandal: that's my "afk"
Comment: #metawire

#298897
<~firez> nothing beat irc in bed tho
<~firez> or the instant moment you wake up
<&Adorable> Laptop > DS
<~firez> i dont have a laptop
<&Adorable> I do
<&Adorable> What I don't have; however, is my mother telling me to get off the computer because 11PM is past my bedtime :D
<~firez> lol
<~firez> i do
<&Adorable> I know :/

#6802
<YyzKnicks> what is anal sex anyway, when you think about it too much and get neurotic?   Ohh, you mean butt sex

#28501
<Yellah> Celebrate the decrimalisation of Pot
<[Piratez]> lets make this national
* [Piratez] replaces the maple leaf on the Canadian flag with a weed leaf.

#756
<folly> and anyone who tells you you can is a moron.
<folly> (or a windows admin, which amounts to much the same thing)

#11973
<Tribespr0n> oh wait
<Tribespr0n> i have an 80 gig drive full of porn
<Tribespr0n> i need to hook that up
<Tribespr0n> Dude at work, brought in an 80 gig drive full of asian porn
<Tribespr0n ok
<Tribespr0n> wtf
<Tribespr0n> this drive is part of a raid array

#10128
<hh> have u ever fucked nickelodean gak?
<hh> i have
<hh> its awesome
<hh> i call it masturbation goo

#96424
* Oddlot_P3 goes to grab some sort of food.
<FuzzyPlushroom> That reminds me
<FuzzyPlushroom> In ninth grade, I got bored in science class and wrote "Is Penis a Food?" on the table
<FuzzyPlushroom> I drew a two-column chart under it, "Yes" and "No"
<Oddlot_P3> Any replys?
<FuzzyPlushroom> The majority of tickmarks were in the "Yes" column
<FuzzyPlushroom> Therefore, in conclusion, I'm forced to consider the possibility that you're a flaming faggot.

#1682
<stc> all us asians look alike
<stc> so getting in with older brother id's is easy heh

#41892
<@SyNMaN> IIII BEEELLLLIIIEEEEVVVEE I CAAANNNN FLYYYYY, I BBBEEEELLLIIEEEVVEEE I CAAANN TOOOUUCCHH THE SKYYYY
<@SyNMaN> although it might be the crack

#33740
<Rykan> Wai~ I reached a whole new level of geekdom today
<Rykan> i actualy WROTE a typo
<Luna> lol rykan XD
<Rykan> I wrote "detaila" instead of "details"
<ZestyO> nothing compares to saying lag out loud...
<Varjaag|Kensai> lol = lagin out loud
<Luna> zesty, have u said "lol" out loud before?
<Rykan> I have
<Rykan> and "omfg"
<ZestyO> yes, I have
<Rykan> "ohmfug" XD

#301439
<hgl> !decide sims
<vurl> Yes
<hgl> ehehe
<Sebas> It's ironic that you get someone else to make the decision for you to play a game that mainly consists of you taking someone else's decisions.

#63
<Moot> masturbatin time
<Moot> I'm livin dangerously
<Moot> I'm not gonan check to see if my mom is asleep yet

#6919
<Uriel> crackhead is driving at 60 MPH and talking to the seats. A stoner is driving at 6 MPH and munching on the seats
<piman> How fast will they be going in 2 hours when they hit?
<pvx> 0 mph. Dammed elephant crossings..

#7070
<Joe_> The word "gun" has been replaced with "Poppinfresh Poke" in all of the history books. Didn't they cover that on the news?
<Joe_> Lemme get my book
<Joe_> The M-1A, the standar issue Poppinfresh Poke up until the Korean Thumbwrestle.
<Joe_> Then, at the advent of the Vietman Squardance, the new standard issue Poppinfresh Poke was a modified version of the old, named the M16a, or as the soldiers called it: "Hoo hoo!"

#30929
<MeatLamp> they lie when they say that crack gets u addicted once - it took me 5 or 6 times to get addicted to the stuff
<garry> same with sniffing underwear

#26399
<WTM1> http://bash.cx/?19872 !!!!!!!!!!!!
<WTM1> car humor brings tears to my eyes
<+[Shinji]> so does anal sex, but that dosen't make it funny

#52155
homerundude85: i had a dream that i was playing poker with the devil
dackattac: Really?
dackattac: Did you win?
homerundude85: yeah i did
dackattac: Sweet
dackattac: What did you win?
homerundude85: a trip to heaven and a diet soda
dackattac: I knew the devil was somehow associated with aspartame.

#1578
<calin> we had a guy at school that wore black lipstick.. and was all gothy.. and then one day we caught him buying an assvibrator
<ecoli> ew.
<ecoli> wait, you "caught" him?
<ecoli> like, you were behind him in line at the assvibrator store?
<Aero> he doesnt answer
*** Quits: calin (No route to host)

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