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#532
<kisama> i've spent my last 5 new year's on either irc or aol
#7344
<[werk]chin> i think its wrong for elderly people to be openly sexual at all
<[werk]chin> they need to be these asexual funnels of christmas money and bad driving
#33543
<TheDarkOfKnight> When I was a seinor in high school we had to make a video and had to have blood packs. The best blood packs are made from condoms.
<TheDarkOfKnight> We had the following on the checkout counter: 1 Box of Trojan Magnum condoms, 2 Bottles of Corn oil, 4 Bottles of red food color, 2 Super 8 video cassettes and 1 Roll of duct tape.
<TheDarkOfKnight> I have never before gotten weirder looks.
#15710
<Stemish> "How many NOC staff does it take it screw in a light bulb?"
<PetrDoubt> 500 to send the outage notices to nocstaff, 14 managers to
escalate it to client services and back, and one to change it.
#34160
<Blah_x> it says i am the computer administor
<trippah> i feel sorry for your pc
Comment: #php efnet
#17301
<Claus> I sell children to old women
<Claus> and they stuff them up their uterus
<Isajeep> oh my god
#21249
<@Elijah_Wood> when and on what channel are the academy awards on?
<@Antipothis> #acadamy_awards
#8494
<helminthes> omg, i was about to walk into class today but it wasn't until right before i opened the door that i realized i wasn't wearing pants, but i didn't go home i went ahead and dealt with it and lo and behold, there was a test in that class that i hadn't studied for at all. so i jumped out the window and right when i hit the ground my cell phone went off
<hakan> yipes
<rafeil> yeh
<helminthes> and that's how it all started
<helminthes> how was your day
#15579
<enJoy> just the other day
<enJoy> I told Chris "So I hear your girl is pregnant"
<enJoy> he goes "Ya and when I find the dude I'm gonna strangle him"
<[zT]Lunchie> =-0
#25660
<tito> why can't they make longer-lasting laptop batteries? ;[
<jestuh> why can't they make longer-lasting titos?
<tito> whats that supposed to mean
<jestuh> you know
#9138
Vahina2002: it was not difficult
Cayen2000: I know but I'm blind in one eye and can't see out the other
#84
<matt> too bad her head looks like an ass
<scv> thats makes blowjobs better, matt
#4415
<MuSKraT> I'm supposed to go to meet a cute girl at a bar with our class, but I keep farting. I CAN'T GO UNTIL I FINISH FARTING.
#12433
<DarkPhan> humm... i want to find some software that will track eye movements on a webcam
<Spooky42> www.fbi.com/shareware
#151875
<Jex> we made a mmo game where you are a member of a popular development team with an army of a few hundred clients demanding updates and the goal of the game is to prolong development as long as possible without getting e-murdered
Comment: #tremdev@freenode.net
#14032
<Arky> im a repeat stupid
<Arky> haha funnily enough..i didn't mean to type stupid :/ i meant to type student...i guess we can see why im repeating now can't we....
#21946
<@Asha`monkey> Storm is like a 64 or something like that.
<+darkLem> boy, he looks younger than he is obviously.
<+nosphalot> he scarifices virgins to keep up appearance
<+darkLem> ...so THAT'S why he hangs around on IRC!
#711
<iln> she was taking her pants off one time
<iln> and her underwear
<iln> and i was watching from the back
<iln> and i said "damn. you have a nice ass."
<iln> then she got on all fours and said "you wanna put it in?"
<iln> and thats how i stole kristin doan's anal virginity.
#302208
<erin> Dammit, Windows! I KNOW the program is not responding. That's why I'm trying to close it.
#299423
<@jpn> "Most UK radio stations are now having to censor the word 'sex' in the line 'birthday sex' replacing 'sex' with the word 'ssh' making it say 'birthday ssh'. This change has occured quite recently as orignally radio stations were free to play the uncensored version."
<@WorstQEvr> do you get birthday ssh when you turn port 22
#243
<!Lun_e> ill just sit here and eat my Kice Rispy Paralellogram.
#31972
<KArmA-> mmm chicks with dicks
<Andreas_1> u like it dont u
<Andreas_1> i thought it was boys with boobs
<KArmA-> no
<KArmA-> that's a fatty
#44618
<looksofat>I sent my mom out for food 3 hours ago
<looksofat> stupid mom eating world
#12164
<Guyp> unreal uses the Super Mario Bros. engine
#9359
<stank> but copying data to a floppy disk and back makes it lose integrity! like dubbing a tape!