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#2514
<steve|zzz> i had this dream
<steve|zzz> i was beating off
<steve|zzz> and my penis was circumsised
<steve|zzz> and it was so big i could use 2 hands
<steve|zzz> best dream i ever had
#5333
<Ophe|ia`> omg I will NEVER shit that fast again.....my anus is burning *sitting down carefully*
#18474
<Fryth> anyone seen the movie pi
<Murdock> I saw it 3.14 times.
#83178
Rs Conqueror: dude
Xenocidaltendncy: hey whatup
Rs Conqueror: "sum up your sex life using star wars quotes"
Xenocidaltendncy: ...
Rs Conqueror: "you were right about one thing, the negotiations were short"
Xenocidaltendncy: young fool... only now, at the end, do you understand
Rs Conqueror: "how're we doing kid?" "same as always.." "that bad huh?"
Xenocidaltendncy: "if money is all you want, then that's what you'll get"
Rs Conqueror: "Ten thousand?? We could buy our own ship for that!"
Xenocidaltendncy: "these aren't the droids you're looking for"
Rs Conqueror: "I don't care what you smell, just get in there you big lug!"
Xenocidaltendncy: "going in at that speed, do you think you'll be able to pull out in time?"
Rs Conqueror: "No luke... I am your father"
Xenocidaltendncy: "and now, princess, we will discuss the location of your rebel base" *thwrum thwruuum thwruuuuum*
Rs Conqueror: "judge me by my size do you?"
Xenocidaltendncy: "Yeah, but this time I've got the money"
Rs Conqueror: She may not look like much, but "she's got it where it counts, kid."
Rs Conqueror: "I haven't seen him. It's possible he came in through the south entrance."
Xenocidaltendncy: "I've got a feeling I'm never going to see her again"
Rs Conqueror: "and I thought these things smelled bad... on the outsde"
Xenocidaltendncy: "Your father wanted you to have this when you were old enough, but your uncle wouldn't allow it"
Rs Conqueror: "You're not actually going INTO an asteroid field...!!!"
Rs Conqueror: "Mudhole? Slimy? My home this is!"
#300909
Actual Chris: facebook is telling me to write on your wall too
Chaos: wow
Chaos: fuck you facebook
Chaos: everyone knows I'm pathetic just leave it be
Actual Chris: haha
Chaos: "hey, make sure this guy doesn't kill himself okay"
#68951
<@semi> man
<@semi> i think i should turn my speakers down
<@zeppeh> or quit listening to nsync
<@semi> i cant tell if its gas from downing that soda or just the bass.
<@zeppeh> nsync doesn't have bass
<@semi> it has lance bass
<@semi> i mean
<@semi> fuck you.
Comment: #brained irc.catheadlabs.com. also, I wasn't listening to nsync.
#2104
<Tim_K> last time I jumped into a convertible.. I nearly got but-fucked by the gear shifter..
#107067
<Razmann> isn't that a sign of the apocalypse or something?
* FurryHelix looks out of the window... "Nope. I don't see the five horsemen"
<Razmann> aren't there only 4?
<FurryHelix> no there were five, but one left before they got famous.
<Razmann> so since the fifth left, that would mean there's only 4
<FurryHelix> reunion tour.
#8844
<marius_#acknak> Prosecutors, quoted by the Associated Press and Reuters, also said the man was carrying a CD-ROM in his baggage that contained a training programme for fighters wanting to wage "holy war."
<marius_#acknak> I wonder if this training program is based on the quake engine.
#59556
Fire> When I code late at night, I find things in it in the morning like /** TODO -- something */
#7106
(Deathwing) I get to see a concert tomorrow, so there
(Lanfear) what concert?
(Deathwing) some guy who plays guitar for commercials
(zed) Wow, some guy who plays guitar for commercials.
(Deathwing) zed, he's one of the most famous guitarist in the world, actually
(Deathwing) up there with Joe Satriani, among others
(Lanfear) that's why you call him 'some guy'?
#309805
<@dmd> if i had a multi-watt laser or something i would probably sit in a book depository and kill people with it
<@dmd> does that make me a bad person
<@Krrrlson> it makes you a person who has not considered the power consumption and cooling requirements
#2373
* JosephKer on 2.4.14
<Snarf> exciting ;>
<JosephKer> yup! I got my kernel down to like 600k though
<Snarf> nice ;>
<^xman^> kernels below 1 mb are for pussies
<^xman^> kernels over 2 mb are for men
<JosephKer> hehe
<JosephKer> It's not how BIG your kernel is, it's how you use it!
<BombScare> sure...thats why girls always laugh at you when you pull out your kernel
<JosephKer> Then I set them straight with a good fsck'ing
#9112
<ManC0W> Mikado : Mitsukake is an ass pirate
<Mikado`> ManC0W: I believe so, yes.
<Mikado`> ManC0W: can he see this?
<Mikado`> ManC0W: if we prefix our sentences with our intended targets, the others can't see it, right?
<ManC0W> Mikado : I think so Brain...
<Mikado`> ManC0W: Cuz I'd really hate for Mitsukake to know how gay I think he is
<Mitsukake> Why is this room so dead all of a sudden?
<Mikado`> LOL
<Mitsukake> What?
<Mitsukake> What's so funny?
#23965
([CoP]Torn) We got a war tonight but no admin yet can someone admin us ~ CoP vs DeF Div 3
([CoP]Torn) We got a war tonight but no admin yet can someone admin us ~ CoP vs DeF in Division 3
([CoP]Torn) We got a war tonight but no admin yet can someone admin us ~ CoP vs DeF in Division 3
(@zapp) stfu kthx
(@zapp) dont spam
([CoP]Torn) who's kthx ?
#7886
<Grimace> I went to a goon party after drinking a bottle o vodka.
<Grimace> I think I had goon and powerade ... ultra blue puke.
<FiremanSam> fluro pukes own
<FiremanSam> i did a bright green one after a cocktails
<Veggie> i did a red spew once.. but that as cocktail related and not blood so I'm happy
<zer0> I once had a mate drink piss from a gatorade bottle (By accident) and spew it back up.....thats like piss and spew in one!!!
<Grimace> wtf............
#5479
<Sinner_> you tell me who you want killed, and ill tell you the girl i want the blowjob from
#239574
<Dark_nite666> Lol, at my friend's birthday party
<Dark_nite666> It was all internet nerds
<Dark_nite666> and when his parents brought his cake out
<Dark_nite666> all it said was "The Game"
<Looce> LOL
<Dark_nite666> everyone in the room went "FUCK"
<Vidi> lmao
<Dark_nite666> then he proceeded to say the cake is a lie
<Dark_nite666> and they took it away
<Dark_nite666> and we all got ice cream and mountain dew >_>
#4143
<uneasier> would it be out of line if i were to request that my testes be softly nestled within your food receptacle?
<Jan__> mmm braized testicle
<Jan__> with a nice bottle of chianti
<Jan__> fthfthfthfthfthfthfth!
* uneasier runs away
#30938
<Caffeine> i was dared to go buy lube
<Caffeine> so i went with my best friend/housemate and talked about double ended dildos while hugging her in the checkout line with ky in my hand
<Caffeine> the cashier asked me 'how was your day'
<Caffeine> i said 'it will be better once i get this hunny home'
<Caffeine> her jaw dropped
Comment: Caffeine is female.
#2315
<TheDeity> It's like there is a party in my mouth, and everyone is throwing up
#297589
<ooops> WHATS THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN DISNEY MOVIES AND MICHAEL JACKSON
<ooops> DISNEY MOVIES CAN STILL TOUCH KIDS
Comment: #themaxx on efnet
#4476
<Dreq> is there anyway to get the DOS version?
<andy> the dos version of win98?
<Dreq> yes
#28917
<^Ocean^> fucking bloody hell
<^Ocean^> I lost 33gig of HDSpace
<LlNK> lol
<LlNK> check under your keyboard
#25616
<Everdraed> We can't grab women's boobs? The terrorists have won!
<Luna`> can't let the terrorists win.
<Everdraed> Exactly Luna
* Everdraed grabs Skyday's boobs
<Skyday> :OP!!!!!!