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#43492
(@ddew|bofh) heh, I really need to get out more. I just ogt annoyed that a truck was revving it's engine outside so I went out to check what was going on. Turns out that the apartment next to mine was on fire and the truck I heard was one of 3 fireengines :)

#8282
<sum1tolded2medatvirtrghey> i thought you did music?
<baygledawg> oh i wish
<baygledawg> that would be my second dream job
<sum1tolded2medatvirtrghey> what's your first? professional sperm producer?
<baygledawg> ok, writing music would be my third dream job

#7120
<AgentAce1> hmm
<AgentAce1> well that's interesting
<AgentAce1> actually...that's fuckin weird ass shit

#25212
<FiZi> HEY I FOUND A COOKIE CRUMB ON MY SHIRT
* FiZi eats it
<FiZi> Aw crap
<FiZi> It wasn't a cookie crumb

#232500
IndigoNocturna: When the guy sat next to me on the bus, it reminded me that for most of my life, I thought that all older men had the same smell... and then I realized that the smell is booze.

#114245
<Prrrrostata> in the back of national lampoon they had little round stickers that had a picture of a screw on them
* JacklynHyde hoists an eyebrow
<Prrrrostata> you could stick them over the heart on bumperstickers
<Prrrrostata> "I <screw> my german shepard"

#3411
<erik> i guess that means oral sex is out of the question then
<grifferz> I dunno, with the stuff I've been coughing up today, your spooge might actually be more pleasant

#46633
<Evilmice> anyway brb nature is calling
<Evilmice> and it sounds nasty
<Spaniard> you have a beatiful way with words

#45988
<sEcretz> my friends who are "sleeping" now in the house screwed me
<sEcretz> they dont know i have a keylogger on
<sEcretz> and i can read that they went and signed on my email
<sEcretz> then on my msn and were like "I fuckn 0wn you biatches" and im like omg.... thats my sister!
<sEcretz> now while they are sleeping. i signed on thier email. sent messages to services@secret.gov and it was like "Im an arabian terrorist. i will bomb the internet! i have coded a /etc/bomb that will deactive in /uptime seconds! bewarn. this is the last message"
<sEcretz> that will teach them not to log on my laptop :(
<icenix> hey, doesnt that log your ip?
<sEcretz> fuck.

#56817
Cobra8279: 1) sleep deprivation alone can not kill you
Cobra8279: and if anything that can not kill you makes you stronger
Cobra8279: soon, i should have superpowers

#53482
<@FireAngel> So, are we meeting tonight?
<%g4ngst4> yeah ;]
<%g4ngst4> i'll give you somethin all your ex bfs didn't.. ;]
<@FireAngel> A STD?

#23839
<manmanandboyboy> date syllabus check
<d00fus> dinner, movie, then snuggling
<munbty> carnival, cotton candy, and then moonlight stroll
<soccy_pants> drugs, rape, 2 hour police chase

#311005
<Analogy> So I just got an audio book, but it was in another language so I had to listen with subtitles

#301779
<Indogutsu> According to an "On This Day in America" calendar hanging on the wall in my office, Robert Fulton (the inventor of the steamboat) appeared before a House committee on February 14th, 1810 to explain the uses of torpedoes.
<Indogutsu> So to all of you who, for whatever reason, can't find love and feel left out and bitter on Valentine's Day, you can instead use this day to remember Robert Fulton and his contributions to undersea warfare.

#48053
<canllaith> mornfall: in my grub bootloader for my laptop it says 'slackware 2.4' 'slackware 2.6' 'Diablo II LOD'
<canllaith> since that's all win2k is good for ;)
<canllaith> ...I shouldn't be allowed to touch bootloaders.

#34381
* Sleigh dons the Jeans of Drunkeness +1 (-2 Against Bushes)

#25221
<Boogieman> I run my fingers up your left thigh
<Boogieman> oops, uhh, wrong channel
<Status> LOL!!
<Boogieman> forget you ever saw that
<Status> Gee, now would be a great time to take that new screenshot...
* Boogieman glances around nervously
<Asmodi> rofl, boogieman, what cha doin?
<Boogieman> certainly not trying to have permiscuous sex with cyber strangers, thats for sure

#80132
<wingnuts> ...
<wingnuts> buddy of mine had an order for a custom "rack".. the one that holds servers and shit
<wingnuts> which is odd, cause he fabricates aluminum shit...
<wingnuts> but they wanted all this heatpipe shit for all the comps
<wingnuts> and he was like "That's nice, but where does the heat go?", and the client points to this massive chunk of metal in the center of the rack with a little flap on it
<wingnuts> and says "That's where the pizza box goes. All the heat from the servers are focused on that. No pizza means the system overheats, so you gotta keep putting fresh boxes in there to absorb the radiant energy".
<wingnuts> :|
<wingnuts> Pizza powered network.

#3576
* RedBull has returned.. I degaussed my girlfriend and I'm just not attracted to her anymore.

#49757
<HonkeyKong> My dick is one inch long, and six inches wide.. They call me "pancake"

#1508
<MegaWorld> Anyone awake?
<hypr> shutup im trying to sleep

#5320
<Lucent-H> who wants pictures of high school cheerleaders that want to do me?
<moijkNrg> Lucent: I don't want to see any male cheerleaders

#16715
<Omega> why do your parents hate you
<Rai> they dont like it that I never come home... I've become somewhat of a drifter of late, till I work things out with airlines/bus
<Rai> I travel to friends houses on my bike, up and down the highway and sleep where I can
<Rai> its fun
<Omega> lol
<Omega> so your a hobo
<Rai> we prefer to be called "domestically challenged"

#40297
<Rjx0r> long hair is kinda gay
<Rjx0r> especially on guys who have a feminine body
<Rjx0r> because sometimes you think
<Rjx0r> "hey, that chick has a nice ass"
<Rjx0r> and it turns around
<Rjx0r> and it's a spotty dude
<timmo> no thats just you rjx
<Rjx0r> I was hoping some of you would relate to that experience
<blueturtl> on your own there chum
<Rjx0r> damn
Comment: #geekissues

#1023
<timmo> for hookers in vegas its like
<timmo> $500
<timmo> they better be fucking me while im playing quake and shit

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