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#11111
(Pixie_Pete): Care to join me in a little sven co-op?
* ssmmdd fires up Sven
(Dogsdinner): That's quite possibly the most homoerotic thing ever said in #TPNGC.
#15071
<cardinal> huh, a friend of mine pissed in his girlfriend's typewriter
<cardinal> under similar circumstances
<alayna> :blink:
<cardinal> drunk, needing to pee, didn't want to turn on the light, found
<cardinal> the "bathroom" door, found the "toilet", opened the lid,
<cardinal> pissed, couldn't find the flusher, went back to bed
<cardinal> discovered the next morning he'd opened the wrong door, and
<cardinal> found the typewriter, not the toilet, which explains the lack
<cardinal> of flush lever
<Deke> and the *ding* when he finished
<cardinal> all I could say when he told me the story was "Good thing it
<cardinal> wasn't a Selectric"
#545
<smcn> the only thing we have to ph33r is peer itself
#56956
<kylie> wanking over me...... that crosses the line
<zBird> hasn't like, every guy in here done that already?
#17193
<dodge> oh shit, i got icecream on my keyboard
<dodge> shit, now chocolate
<dodge> i should clean it instead of mashing it under the keys
#193949
<Zachary> someone gave me an engraved rock for my birthday with ZACHERY on it
<Zachary> I mean first off you just gave me a fucking rock for my birthday
<Zachary> and then my name is on it and it's misspelled
<Zachary> of course maybe that was just the name of the rock
#50560
<+Warrior412> (*)
<+Warrior412> It's an olive.
<+Warrior413> .-.
<+Warrior413> it's a park bench
<+Warrior412> $$$$$$$ it's 7 dollar signs
<+Warrior413> oh
<+Heero> It's two idiots :-P
Comment: #intuitive on ECNet
#1598
<k-rad-bob> omg
<k-rad-bob> I just realized
<k-rad-bob> I have a fully working penis in my pants
<k-rad-bob> brb
#8531
[invertiga] back
[Lord-Data] we missed you
[Lord-Data] wait.. no we didnt
#7339
<NeSSa`> yeah but he isnt fucking him?
<[ben]> not to my knowledge...jason was walkin a little funny tonight though
#49491
<xkcd> Guy in line: English should be the national language, these immigrants should have to learn English when they come here.
<xkcd> Girl in line: Yeah
<xkcd> Guy: When you go to live somewhere, you learn the language they speak there. English is the language of the land.
<xkcd> Sarah Mac: (from behind in line) Excuse me, but -- osio sarah dawado.
<xkcd> Guy: What the hell was that?
<xkcd> Sarah: Cherokee.
#36239
<ozwald> some guy my mom knows at work (ive never met him) bought me a 50$ book on java
<ozwald> from amazon
<+retry> wow
<ozwald> called thinking in java
<+retry> nothing says I wanna fuck your mother like a book on java
<ozwald> i know
<ozwald> oh well
<Rift> prolly saying, im scrogging your mom and will soon be your step dad, so here is a gift
Comment: #maddox on WhatNET
#544
*** WindDrake has quit IRC (well, LadyDrake awaits. «~{Polaris IRC}~» v2.03 Alpha)
<|Ender|> ohh look Winds gonna go masturbate
<smcn> yeh, ladydrake is a weirdass name for a penis
#34774
<J3anyus> Dollar Losing Value Against The Quarter
<J3anyus> NEW YORK—After falling 6 percent in the past three weeks, the U.S. dollar hit a 208-year low against the U.S. quarter, which had been valued at exactly 0.25 dollars since its introduction in 1796. "The dollar continues to slide against most major currencies," Morgan Stanley analyst Richard Jemison said. "At the end of the day Tuesday, the quarter was trading at .267 yen, .203 euros, and US$0.28. But what we're really seeing here is not just a dollar weakened by a sluggish economy, but an exceptionally resilient quarter-dollar." Jemison was quick to point out that the dollar remains very strong against the nickel.
<Tik-Tok> wtf
<Tik-Tok> I didn't even realize you guys placed seperate values on your quarters and dollars
<Tik-Tok> I thought it was just measured in dollars
#4424
<amoeba> it's a little known fact that the binary releases aren't actually compiled by anyone, they just mysteriously appear on the FTP site packaged and ready for release.. it's postulated that the Devil himself uses Mozilla, and in return for using it he takes care of the insane build requirements
#49704
<Celestar> OMFG
<Celestar> people have weird ideas on how computers work
<glx> why?
<Bjarni> you mean they feed the little people in the CPU?
<Celestar> some colleague just asked me what gcc version supported the creation of graphical user interfaces
<Celestar> they also asked me why gcc doesn't support c++ :S
<glx> wow!
<Bjarni> you work for Mircosoft?
#144151
<abc> I think it's time to switch to a new job.
<Wizard> why?
<lifesazoo> piss poor excuse for a wizard .. a real wizard would just know
#299580
<Pryoidain> Alright, my QDB script is complete!
<asaph> QDB Script?
<Pryoidain> Yeah, see I got tired of the weird thing they use where 1 positive vote and 1 negative vote cancel out to give 0 votes in the numerator of your quote rating...
<Pryoidain> So I devised a formula. Positive Votes = Numerator + [(Denominator - Numerator)/2]
<Pryoidain> I then made a script that searches for my nick on QDB, gathers the various quote levels, runs the above formula, and then tells me how much people love me!
<cjk> Interesting. I may want a copy.
<Pryoidain> Execute Nao!
*five minutes pass*
<Pryoidain> Hm. It must have failed.
<Pryoidain> Either that or -pi people enjoy my quotes.
<asaph> The latter option seems more plausible.
<Pryoidain> Fuck off.
#37556
<gloone> i've seen kraftwerk live
<gloone> it was pretty cool
<gloone> my gf saw them life this summer and she can't shut up about it
<gloone> she even mentioned it after sex once, she was in a really good mood
<gloone> and i was like "was it that good?" and the replied that she was thinking about the kraftwerk concert :(
Comment: #ramen
#77824
[JaMiNkLe] i am retarded.. trying to install Linux on my old dual 800 and it wont boot from the cd i tried everything then just after looking in the bios for the last time i went to open the cd drive to smash the fucking cd and it was upside down wasn't it >.<
#7651
<Squirrel> and if I'm looking at porn and I jizz all over the RPC's keyboard, is that on-topic?
#1498
<steef> i feel sorry for kids today, when they reminisce on their childhood, they will have songs by britney spears and backstreet boys
#50901
Xeno: *listens to bananphone*
Xeno: its been stuck in my head
Duke: Oh man
Xeno: To top it off a friend online started typing hte lyrics.
Duke: Ring ring ring ring ring ring rign bananaphone
Duke: I'd like to see that guy in a punk band
Duke: Ring ring ring BANANARCHY!!!!
Xeno: ...I could scoure the internet for ages and never find an emoticon to either praise or insult you
#8682
<jamesm> what are you running on the alphas?
<MMouse> tru64 at the moment
<MMouse> with oracle
<jamesm> no wonder so many dotcoms go under
#9645
<reflexive> WHAT'S COOL ABOUT THIS JOB
<reflexive> IS THAT I GET ALL THE COFFEE I WANT.
<reflexive> ehehehehhehehe.
<|reptile|> coffee blackens your teeth, taints your breath, and thrashes your nerves.
<reflexive> ...where's the downside?