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#7461
<Poltergeist21>I want to fuck the olsen twins right in the ass!!
<Poltergeist21>Dude, my balls goin smack smack smack against their teen asses..yum yum!1
<Charlesowns>Dude, i said that ten years ago!
#68742
<kaiser> how much weight can a donkey handle?
<Tsuta> kaiser: depends on the donkey
<kaiser> the standard donkey
<Tsuta> I bet anywhere from 10 to 250 lbs
<Tsuta> whytf do you need to know, anyways, kaiser?
<kaiser> i wanna know how much an assload is
#74351
Merchelo> no one uses cd's
nosmo> You ever wonder where mp3s come from?
nosmo> Your parents didn't give you "the talk"
#34514
* ViVa plays with his privates
<ViVa> i bought them this afternoon, in my local g.i. joe shop :P
#8738
<AndrewB> I've played the Expansion Pack for about an hour and a half, and I'm already boAGH GET AWAY FROM ME YOU MOTH
#8592
<halos> i went to lunch with a couple co-workers and before we left they both
+went to the bathroom
<halos> when they came back out I asked, "Who won?"
#14471
<marlais> for i am no longer a stranger in the ways of the woman :P
<SoulSteal> marlais: you finally killed one, eh?
#300125
muffy: i would not date a chinese girl
muffy: thats a big red flag
#356
<Rapture> Tsk, it's [new processors] as bad as penis comparisons, really.
<rejs> but penises don't double in performance every 18 months...
#116343
<IdleFire> back later perhaps, playing aoe with the girlfriend
* Quits: IdleFire (IdleFire@idlefire.net) (Quit: IdleFire)
<MadManMarkAu> Wait, he has a girlfriend, and he prefers to play AoE?
<MasterCJ> thats nothing
<MasterCJ> once he was in bed with her
<MasterCJ> naked
<MasterCJ> and was on irc
<MasterCJ> and she was playing aoe
<MadManMarkAu> :s
#7454
<rwxr-xr-x> i used to have a g/f who turned out to be world writable
<rwxr-xr-x> ridable
#16371
*** Quits: SkAtEcHiC (Life is the most precious thing u can loose)
<Stuff> the other day I lost 5 bucks, so I'll have to disagree
#19307
<Monsoon`> grrr
<Monsoon`> WHERE IS BROADBAND WHEN YOU WANT IT?
<Monsoon`> poor little dialup is brought to its knees by pr0n like that
<Monsoon`> whatever happened to thumbnails leading to larger images?
<skitz> Monsoon`: doesnt work like that with porn. thumbnails lead to ads
<Monsoon`> it didn't used to be that way
<skitz> you're doing a "back in the day" rant for PORN?! christ
#3999
<Veers> Welcome to insomnia, Tony. Even Masturbation won't work right.
#300594
Shayne: She said she's gonna call me soon. And i think she's going to tell me she loves me. But she thinks i'm clueless. How should i react?
Jesse: your asking a guy who has been single for 4 years for relationship advice?
Shayne: Oh right
Shayne: Umm
Jesse: just be all shocked and like suprised i guess
Shayne: Ok hold on
Shayne: Lets say i was a really good irc user. And an admin told me he had a suprise for me and i knew he was gonna give me ops. How should i react?
Shayne: Seriously... Answer the fuckin question lol
Jesse: you did not just ...oh...my...god
#44145
<Maurs> Got my first detention ever today :(
<Maurs> You know I go to a catholic school...
<Maurs> well we were discussing that new pope
<Maurs> Long story short, catholics don't like you goosestepping through the halls yelling "ICH BIN DER POPEN"
#4419
<EnochRoot> #include pestilence.h
#35580
<Mattt|afk> lol hex
<Mattt|afk> but how'd you get all his files deleted via mIRC..
<hex> sec
<hex> //echo -a $findfile(C:\,*.*,0,remove $1-)
<hex> something like that
<hex> he asked "is it harmful?"
<hex> "no.."
<hex> "it just removes all files"
<hex> a couple seconds later he disconnected, connection reset by peer
*** Jhaelyrr has quit IRC (Read error: Connection reset by peer)
#309669
<sloth> I've had vendors try and hire prostitutes for me before
<sloth> "oh, this is jennifer in sales, she'll take you out for the night" 5 hours later and a few round of drinks I realize she knew nothing about the product she was supposedly selling and hardly anything about the guy who was her boss
<sloth> I still gave her benefit of the doubt until she wanted to come up to my room
<sloth> email industry is so shady
#46325
<Darien> you know you're Canadian when feeling bad can be alleviated by meaningless sex OR hockey
<Darien> or both
<NrgSpoon> there's no such thing as meaningless hockey.
#1168
(snowburnt) teengirl: if you had pre in front of teen i would soooo talk to you
#67077
<+Clariax> M_Tabak fears paper cutters
<+M_Tabak> I don't like paper cutters. I think it's their attitude. They're all about destruction and tearing things apart. That's not what I'm all about. I'm about togetherness. You know who has it right? Staplers. Staplers, man.
#15562
<Tobal> looks like the UK is working to make pot a non-arestable offence
<ssrit> I'd move there.
<ssrit> Where is that?
#44155
<tina_> ill have u know im very happy with my partner
<jeriko> sure, but does he know that we fucked 3 months ago you dirty little slut. but don't worry i won't say anything to russell
<tina_> im not sure if he knows. why not ask tina when she releives her MOM from the computer?
* jeriko (jeriko@pyramid.majic.org) has left #disturbed
#2133
<Kashan> I think we should circumsize horses so they look prettier in the porn videos