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#2635
<asr> 'fo sheezy.
<Sabboth> what the fuck does that mean in english? you should understand that having a day job precludes me from 'keeping it real' and as such, I lack a certain familiarity with the language of the 'streets' as it were.
#141808
Quantas: I'm waiting for my mom to roll it.
Alt: There is nothing about that sentence that isn't fucking hilarious.
Quantas: LOL I know
Quantas: but it's true
Quantas: I can't roll
[30 Minutes Later]
Quantas: I just toked. With my mom.
Alt: Yeah, again, there's several things wrong with this concept.
Quantas: It's canada, eh?
#2590
<Legind> I cant remember my earliest memory
#183939
<&ScaryLptp> on my blackberry I have a turret voice from Portal that says "preparing to dispense product" when I get email for one account. I just stepped up to a urinal beside 2 people and had it go off and I couldn't stop laughing. surprised I didn't piss all over myself.
<&ScaryLptp> unzip, "preparing to dispense product"
Comment: #shsc
#34235
<port-> MadDwarf please take a bow
<MadDwarf> sorry , but I DON'T bend over in this channel
Comment: #windowsxp efnet
#8291
<darkness> anyone heard about the new startrek movie yet?
<freddy66> YAH INCHERECTION IS SUPPOSTED TO BE GOOD I SAW IT LAST WEEK AND ENJOYED IT
<darkness> ...did he just say what I think he said?
<questie> I believe he just admitted to being russian, but I'm not quite sure...
#310234
<@Slime_Master> I hear damn near all of the wildlife in Australia wants to kill humans
<@Slime_Master> even something as cute as Koalas
<@Xenesis> Koalas are gross and mean.
<@Xenesis> Anyone who thinks koalas are cute has never heard them fuck.
<@Slime_Master> O_O
<@Alex_Lykos> .....
<@Slime_Master> I don't think that's an image I need in my head right now
<@Alex_Lykos> as if i would want to know why you watched koalas fuck
<@Xenesis> Watched? No.
<@Xenesis> Heard from hundreds of metres away? Yes.
#41708
<davidmccabe> I tried making a parody of crappy techno. The problem is, it's indistinguishable from real crappy techno.
#181508
<indrora> the county commision for the blind has a shitty way of making users not mess with settings
<indrora> they set the password for the admin account to "youcantseeme"
#33715
<vSvAINT> Rune...do you ever Sleep Man?
<RuneWalsh> [09:01am] <dcpsoguy> r00n: Do you sleep?
<RuneWalsh> [09:01am] <@RuneWalsh> nah, sleeping goes against everything I believe in
<vSvAINT> it's kind of sad you have a prepared response for that
<RuneWalsh> no, it's spontaneous
<vSvAINT> Spontaneous like Combustion or Spontaneous like Jerry Lewis?
<RuneWalsh> besides, I responded to that question earlier and didn't feel like typing that again
<RuneWalsh> I'll have to think about that
<RuneWalsh> I wouldn't really call Jerry Lewis spontaneous though
<RuneWalsh> which doubles as my point as well
<vSvAINT> Haha Instantaneous. "NEW! Instantaneous Jerry Lewis! Just add Water!"
<RuneWalsh> "Wow mommy, can I have one?"
<RuneWalsh> "Not till you're older, dear"
#34211
<Heather> penises are scary =/
<Kevyn> how so?
<Heather> they feel weird.
<Kevyn> how do they feel?
<Heather> like the rubber lizard in spencer's.
#538
<MadHatter> what you know about people and the way things work I could comfortably pass through the hole in my penis
#30771
<colombianp4> how can i download some hardware?
#60788
<Haohmaru77> a woman enters a vibrators shop,
<Haohmaru77> and shes all excited
<Haohmaru77> so she asks the vendor
<Haohmaru77> "do you sell vibrators?"
<Haohmaru77> and the guys like "yes"
<Haohmaru77> so the girl asks
<Haohmaru77> "do you know how they work?"
<Haohmaru77> and the guys like "yes"
<ichi_nii_san> .....
<Haohmaru77> so the girl, all excited, asks
<Haohmaru77> "could you tell me how to turn it off?"
#42421
<PunchBag> haha, earlier i saw this girl wearing this T-shirt that had the words "I wish these were brains" written on her boobs
#32155
<Scepterr> i think i pissed myself yesterday
<Scepterr> but i dont remember
<Scepterr> cause when i woke up this morning i noticed that my pants were soaking wet
<Scepterr> but it doesnt smell like piss
Comment: in oper channel at BetasIRC
#295537
+Cpt_Blinky: I'm so bleak
+Cpt_Blinky: cos I have all this shiny new anime
+Cpt_Blinky: but I have to wait three weeks to watch it!
+Cpt_Blinky: DOH!
@Crais: O.o
@Crais: why is that?
+Cpt_Blinky: My desktop is in the shop
+Cpt_Blinky: and my Laptop can't handle hi-def
+Cpt_Blinky: :(
@Crais: what happened to your desktop?
+Cpt_Blinky: I'm embarrassed to say...
+Cpt_Blinky: I will lose my street cred if the news gets around LOL
@Crais: Don't worry
@Crais: It won't
+Cpt_Blinky: ok you ready?
@Crais gives a sinister chuckle
+Cpt_Blinky: get this!
+Cpt_Blinky: I blew the motherboard...
@Crais: O.o
+Cpt_Blinky: putting laptop ram in it and switching it on!
+Cpt_Blinky hides in shame
@Crais: LMAO HAHAHAHAHA
+Cpt_Blinky: and I'm not even a hardware noob!
+Cpt_Blinky: LOL
@Crais: oh yes you are
@Crais: LOL
+Cpt_Blinky: you bastards I knew I shoulda kept mum
+Cpt_Blinky: ok I'm a hardware noob I admit it
@Crais will treasure this chatlog forevah.
+Cpt_Blinky: yes yes let's all have a good laugh at the muppet blinky
DeathRow: You should have made a video dude
+Cpt_Blinky: yeah of my face as I smelled that horrible smell of my melting preciousssssss
@Crais: ok one question
@Crais: how'd you manage to put laptop ram in your desktop MBO?
@Crais: it -doesn't even fit-
+Cpt_Blinky: omg now I'm really embarrassed
+Cpt_Blinky: ok check it out
+Cpt_Blinky: so it was called a RAM kit
+Cpt_Blinky: 2 sticks in one pack
+Cpt_Blinky: omg I can't believe I'm telling you this
+Cpt_Blinky: so I thought cool
+Cpt_Blinky: you put both sticks in one slot and the kit is 'assembled'!
@Crais: HAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHA
+Cpt_Blinky is AFK killing himself
#308528
< xiphias> sycobuny: maybe you can answer this
< xiphias> sycobuny: if perl doesn't have a JIT, how come it's so fast
<@sycobuny> because it spends less time on buzzwords and more time on just fucking doing the work?
Comment: irc.malkier.net #malkier
#5987
<Foggie> i wish i could buy shares in hot women
<Foggie> then i could go to ashley judd and be like "you gotta sleep with me since i own 2% of you"
#50658
[10:42] chad: you now your an asset to a company when they bail you out of jail.
#34992
<Bolwerk> You know what's so great about the advance of WiFi internet? There used to be Internet pornography around you going through the wires all the time. Now the Internet pornography is literally being transmitted through you. George W. Bush must love the thought that binary data representing people fencing each other with their cocks is passing right through him all the time now.
#23672
* Spades has quit IRC (Remote host closed the connection)
* Spades has joined #nekobox
<Spades> and that was the power button..... x.x
#30305
<`Frieza> dont you get it! I have a giant Brain that is capable of reduceing anything down to a yes or no question.
<bUdDyLeE> LOL `Frieza I don't think that's how it's supposed to work
<bUdDyLeE> watch
<bUdDyLeE> What is the meaning of life?
<`Frieza> yes
<bUdDyLeE> elaborate
<`Frieza> no
<bUdDyLeE> fair enough.
#39247
· · Quit : Surreal [ ximaginary@66.187.166.5 ]
· · Joins : Surreal [ ximaginary@66.187.166.5 ]
[ Surreal ] omg -_-
[ Surreal ] My mom scared the cat and the cat tripped over my master switch for my computer
#95496
<Lash> What's worse: Cancer or AIDS?
<Lash> Cancer. Because with AIDS, atleast you got laid.