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#27202
<cth> Well guys, I just learned a very valuable lesson.
<cth> Never, accidently run over your girlfriend's dog with your riding mower while going 30MPH.
<cth> NEVER
#176538
Exolent: I'll be back in like 15 minutes, i need to fake going to sleep so i can come back and stay up.
(the next morning)
Exolent: Sorry i didn't come back last night. i fell asleep trying to fake fall asleep.
#8323
<dt--> womb- im a big proponent of enviroment conditioning the youth
<wombrood> dt: 'environment,' for future reference
<djthrush> also, believing that something is true does not make you a
'proponent'
<djthrush> 'proponent' is closer in meaning to 'advocate'
<dt--> im aware of its meaning
<dt--> but thanks webster
<djthrush> i don't think you are! since you used it wrong and all
<dt--> how did i use it wrong?
<djthrush> i just explained it to you
<djthrush> are you some sort of illiterate fag?
<djthrush> are you a homeless boozer who just wandered into an internet
cafe? what?
<djthrush> i mean, really
#3737
<lonelyfig> who here can name all the punk bands that have won Grammy's?
<Lawd> u2 and umm
<Lawd> fuck thats it
<nXwetrust> u2 punk?.......
<lonelyfig> U2 = not a punk band
<Lawd> yeah they are
<blazemore> hahaha
<lonelyfig> no they arent
<Lawd> they started out as a punk band
<blazemore> michael jackson also started out as a black person
<Lawd> haha wtf :|
#6780
<DaScott> I want to be in the @home commercials, when they interview the dorks that use it "I can sure download a ton of porn!"
#228
<Guilty> Nov 27 23:45:02 Box1 MormonGuard[20721]: Mormons be tryin' to break into y0 system!
<Guilty> Thank god for you MormonGuard
#14205
<hoche> heredocs, theredocs, everwhereadocsdocs
<geo> old macdonald had a server farm
<geo> He eyed the I/O
#31799
<McDeath> thank god for electricity
<Jake_Edwards> yeah, if it weren't for electricity we'd all be watching television by candlelight
<gower> and how useless would all the power plants be
<conrad> at least you can still use your computer in the dark
Comment: from #qegs
#30108
<@manero> this song sounds like a fucking fire alarm
<@manero> BEEEEEEEEEEEEE BEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE BEEEEEEEEEEE BEEEEEEEEEEE BEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE BEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
<@manero> oh shit
<@manero> IT IS THE FIRE ALARM
<@manero> hahah fuck me bbrk
#23974
(@GKB) How the hell do I idle?
#19994
<yakk> oh fuck
<yakk> I just realised that the "faith based missile defense" wasn't a joke
#3160
<Spin0ut> devvie: Hey, it may be short, but it sure is skinny
#159049
<Jeremy> I remember the first time one of my friends got stoned....it was fucking great. he thought he wasn't feeling it, and we were playing tekken tag. He's sitting there cussing because his remote's not working, then we look over and his right hand isn't on the controller, it's in the bag of popcorn.
<Jeremy> He was twitching his hand IN THE BAG like he was trying to hit buttons
<pariah> LMFAO.
<pariah> That is awesome.
<Jeremy> He ended up winning the match because I fell out of my chair laughing at him and couldn't stop
#7772
<ph^pr0phet> i got kicked in the balls earlier in the summer
<chaowork> ouch
<Booger> hah
<chaowork> by a chick?
<Booger> try to NOT do that
<ph^pr0phet> yea
<ph^pr0phet> heh
<Booger> or wear a nutcup
<chaowork> u need to learn to stand sideways when u hit on em
#9262
Panny: I could sell my soul back to my ex for a computer.
RebelPrincess: don't.
Panny: I could sell my soul to Microsoft for a computer.
RebelPrincess: don't!!!!
#249263
<Paine> "Cuntcannon" is a fun word.
<Paine> I just invented it.
<Paine> it's a verb.
<Paine> "She cuntcannoned that pingpong ball across the room"
<fireweasel> i think a cannon implies an ignition source. it's more like a pussypult.
#51588
blucracksmurf: my whole life i thought men only had a couple feelings: angry, amused, wow that was dumb, and ow that hurt.....now i'm discovering there are more
blucracksmurf: i can't decide if i like it
Seven11Slurpes: there are only 4 for straight guys. What you are, I don't know anymore
blucracksmurf: i hate you
#7421
<WargasM> i like chocolate
<WargasM> it makes me think of boobies
<WargasM> i wonder if you could make a woman lactate chocolate milk, if the DNA was just right
#82731
DanielKeep : Ooh, do you have one of those IRC clients that beeps when it sees your name, miller[]?
benny99 : DanielKeep: cool, let's write a script that plays a melody by highlighting him :)
DanielKeep : Now *there's* an idea
DanielKeep : 1-bit music via IRC spamming
#41219
[@jmelloy] my dad went to highschool with Janeway
[@selcouth] jmelloy: YOUR DAD IS IN STARFLEET?
#11032
<jablowme> why do some people associate nerds with small cocks?
<Jonny-TD> so girls wont like nerds.....duh
<jablowme> those fucking fags.
#309379
< V0id> one advantage of a complicated root password is can't type it when drunk
#1855
<hoset-> what's the server info for defunkt?
<D\TOX> 65.4.40.157 - port 21 - anonymous
<hoset-> thanks much
<D\TOX> np
<D\TOX> if that doesn't work it's because I gave you your own IP #
#53679
xyzzy314: lol i saw this mcdonalds advertisement
xyzzy314: "until you can illegally download food, this is your best deal - the mcdonalds dollar menu"
#93971
JonTG> Man, my penis is so big if I laid it out on a keyboard it'd go all the way from A to Z
JonTG> wait, shit