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#140596
<LoveLight> it would be cool if a woman gave birth and pushed so hard that the baby fired out of her cooter at incredible speeds, then the umbilical cord acted like a bungee cord and the baby went right back in
<AppleBoy> o_O
<AppleBoy> where the hell did that idea come from?
<LoveLight> idk
<LoveLight> an intoxicated mind
Comment: From ##physics on Freenode
#9560
<PYRoTkNiX> i dont look at naked horses
#18574
<OlDirtyB> thats why i fuck sheep next to cliffs
<OlDirtyB> they push back
#299982
<Cynake> French is a useless language for being angry.
<Cynake> No matter how angry you are, and how hateful the words you say, it still sounds like you're looking at yourself in the mirror and admiring your dress and makeup.
<Cynake> Russian is a great language to swear in if you're understood.
<Cynake> Entry-level Russian swearing starts off with phrases like "Oh rotting whore on my dick"
<Cynake> Instead of "Oh crap"
<lorraine> So romantic.
Comment: #trl
#14399
<radii> i'm unRARing, listening to an MP3, AOLing, useing FlashFXP, Serv-U, AIM, mIRC and going to that wepage
<baloo_> aoling = molesting 13 year-old girls online?
<pagan> baloo: no it means your messaging them to come over and get molested
<radii> yeah, duh!
#35041
<nerd> I want a fucking irssi session :/
<zero> i want a girl
<nerd> trade? :D
#10475
*** hep transubstantiated into SUPERMEGAHYPERKITTEN
*** SUPERMEGAHYPERKITTEN transubstantiated into SUPERMEGAPANTSLESSKITTEN
*** Starscream (eric@dis.gruntle.org) has joined channel #insub
<Starscream> hi.
<Starscream> i came in because hep has no pants.
#58591
pancreas: If homosexuality is a disease, can I call in gay?
#30729
<+Raven> any C gurus around?
<Kaelic> try me
<+Raven> I wonder if realloc is the same as free & malloc pair, or does it save data that was originally in the memory block
<Kaelic> nevermind
#2755
<Nick-spy> MY ROOSTER RAN AWAY! SOMEONE GRAB MY COCK!
#39802
<jo> fiendish....
<jo> u have never been a pain in my ass
<jo> just so ya know
<Telnus> cuz his weenie's too small to be a pain
* Telnus rimshot!
<jo> how do u know?
<Telnus> THIS CONVERSATION IS OVER
#302208
<erin> Dammit, Windows! I KNOW the program is not responding. That's why I'm trying to close it.
#56249
<Advocate> Hey guys, wanna hear a riddle? ^^
<Advocate> There's jill and jack on the floor, dead
<LightFang> They're fish
<Advocate> I hate you
#11784
<Dunrick> My iq is 20/20
#10783
<gr0undh0g> I spent an hour and a half once trying to tie a hair to a fly
<kritical> whyd you do that?
<gr0undh0g> so I could have a pet
#4082
<[ric]> Jim, tsk, tsk... you're getting as bad as me :)
<JibberJim> Eh, I've never been unnatural with a goat.
<[ric]> jim... ok, almost as bad as me
#3677
<w3nis> I remember discussing bong tactics with a friend and drawing out plans and then we realized we had drew a pelican
#61838
<hybrid> emacs has a text adventure game in it
<PyroMithrandir> emacs IS a text adventure game
#7288
<PovRayMan> that was a weird dream I had last night
<PovRayMan> I was about to have sex with this hot chick
<PovRayMan> and I started peeing all over her
<PovRayMan> and she started gargling it too... damn weird
<PovRayMan> I think I know what caused it too
<PovRayMan> I went to the bathroom about 5 times last night ot pee
<PovRayMan> and a friend of mine was showing me pics he took of this girl on his campus he wants to be with
<Floach> and 3), you have a pee fetish
<gridbug> Yep.
<PovRayMan> I don't have a pee fetish.
<PovRayMan> I was trying to fuck her damnit
<PovRayMan> but I couldn't stop peeing on her
#311241
<technoid> All of the shirts say "slimmer fit". Are there any "unix admin" sized ones?
#307043
<@Rjx> god damn it
<@Rjx> whoever said I'd learn to like the Star Trek Enterprise theme was right
#34306
<Jerec> I went to the bookstore this morning and saw a book called 'AOL for Dummies'
<Jerec> That's like killing one bird with two stones!
#14690
Zedd: i fucking hate kids.
IronHelix: They won't shut up. Ever.
Zedd: Fucking annoying brats. They serve no practical purpose other than taking up valuable resources.
IronHelix: They scream when they're happy. They scream when they're scared. They scream when you toss them in the garbage disposal. It never ends!
#4383
<Real> I found a hooker with a heart of gold. I TORE IT OUT AND MELTED IT DOWN FOR DRUG MONEY!
#27964
<bishead> 8===========================>
<[Piratez]> 8=D
<bishead> u got jipped
<[Piratez]> i'm jewish