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#70701
<rm-rf> !8 die of starvation or eat lunch
<Willow> rm-rf: die of starvation
<rm-rf> damn
#1601
<skatoni> will some one please help
<`NeXiGeN`> what's yer problem ?
<skatoni> there is a guy hacking into my computer
<`NeXiGeN`> unplug yer modem
<skatoni> how?
<`NeXiGeN`> see all those wires behind your computer box ?
<`NeXiGeN`> ripem all out
*** skatoni has quit IRC (Read error to skatoni[ppp012.rosenet.net]: Connection reset by peer)
#28641
<MariTrunk> i wish everything was like a one click procedure
<MariTrunk> you know
<MariTrunk> i want to go to sleep
<MariTrunk> but i have to format
<MariTrunk> i wish i can give a command and then everything is dun by morning
<MariTrunk> all updates
<MariTrunk> drivers
<MariTrunk> all apps installed
<MariTrunk> just one command
<[Piratez]> its called ghosting
#3341
<MicroChip> ok, so who's gonna win the superbowl?
<Chucker-away> the Yankees
<bishop> the sox
<MicroChip> you guys are so female
#47173
Kel: woops
Kel: the account number doesn't go in the Amount box
Kel: i don't want to transfer $579835962 to account number 145
#43832
<gaurav> you're a bit of a comedian
<thame^> you're a megabyte of a fag
Comment: #mircscripts.org Undernet
#50201
<Symbiotic> So I just found out that my school has a Student Anarchy Club.
<Symbiotic> All they do is sit around, eat pizza, and occasionally challenge the Student Government to a fistfight.
#299905
<@eliot> someone hilight me please
<@eliot> SAY MY GOD DAMN NAME
< lolidunno> elio
< micro_ulaelable> elio t
<@eliot> ..
< micro_ulaelable> _ _ _
< micro_ulaelable> ___| (_) ___ | |_
< micro_ulaelable> / _ \ | |/ _ \| __|
< micro_ulaelable> | __/ | | (_) | |_
< micro_ulaelable> \___|_|_|\___/ \__|
#5579
<|argh|> I was caring for a woman from Kentucky and asked, "So how's your breakfast this morning?" "It's very good, except for the Kentucky Jelly. I can't seem to get used to the taste," the patient replied. I then asked to see the jelly and the woman produced a foil packet labeled KY Jelly.
#141
<ILLogik> i was having cybersex with this chick but she wouldn't go all the way so i had to rape her
#10941
<Drezdar> I am a white, supple 21 year old male from New York City. I enjoy the big life...when I leave my house. I enjoy computer games, PS2 games, Xbox games, Dreamcast games, SNES games, N64 games, GBA games, Genesis games, Amiga 500 games, C64 games, Atari 800XL games, and porn. I am very good at masturbation so I think I would be very good in bed. If you would like to meet me, email me or cyber me on AIM.
#29818
<Optima|Kraft> http://edition.cnn.com/2003/TECH/ptech/10/01/g3.health.reut/index.html
<Parak> great
<Parak> soon we're all going to be mutants
<Optima|Kraft> tru
<Matrim> However, cognitive functions such as memory and response times were boosted by both 3G signals and the current signals, the study found. It said people became more alert when they were exposed to both.
<Matrim> fuckin' sweet
<Matrim> i guess this explains japan
<Parak> However, reproductive functions such as erection and ejaculation times were boosted by both hentai and the anime signals, the study found. It said people became more horny when they were exposed to both.
<Parak> i guess this explains japan
<Parak> :/
#310594
<rymate1234> z33k33 is trolling imo
<walle303> s/troll/z33k33
<PikalaxALT> walle303: rymate1234 actually meant: z33k33 is z33k33ing imo
<walle303> A sleeping POKeMON blocks the way!
<Renb> s/^.*$/butts/
<PikalaxALT> Renb: walle303 actually meant: butts
<Renb> s/^.*$/\nQUIT :butts/
<PikalaxALT> Renb: PikalaxALT actually meant:
* PikalaxALT has quit (Quit: butts)
<Renb> LOL
Comment: abusing a sed script.
#1800
<Matt-H> Leeches cure everything.
<JDigital> What about an allergy to leeches?
<Fry> What about loss of blood ?
<Matt-H> 'cept that, you witty bastard, you.
<JDigital> Or a fear of leeches.
<JDigital> Or lag.
#310161
<RHExcelion> You know, when I Was a kid, playing oregon trail
<RHExcelion> I'd shoot the damn tumbleweed
<RHExcelion> And wonder why I never got any meat
<Edward_Bebop> you thought the tumbleweed was an animal???
#27801
<jwz> I met a guy who was a freshman at berkeley who had just arrived from india, and he said, "I can't take the beggars here seriously. they have legs."
#9095
<cams> eewwww
<cams> my mom got that easy squirt shit
<cams> purple ketchup
<nzc> now you can be flaming while you eat, too.
#19210
<kow> I went to laser quest today
<kow> and some kid goes
<kow> how do you turn the auto aim on?
#63089
<Surt> i learned an important lesson tonight
<Surt> never tell a woman you love her while staring her square in the breasts
<Surt> bad times follow
#23907
<mog> !8BALL WILL MARA KICK ME IN TWO SECONDS FOR ABUSING THE CAPS LOCK BUTTON?
<FarkStatsBot> mog: You may rely on it.
* mog was kicked by Mara (Caps abuse - 100%)
#2410
(cooey) my cat eats meat. my cat eats timbits. my cat eats celery. my cat eats my weed. my cat eats bits of paper and hair that look like food. my cat =wont= eat a piece of a burger out of a big mac.
(cooey) i should learn from my cat.
#78993
<Sanguini> Dear Sir/Madam,
<Sanguini> You are a lucky winner in our "Win a Tomahawk Cruise Missile" competition.
<Sanguini> Please send us your GPS coordinates to claim your prize.
#9192
<les_savy_fav> all i know is mr.Ed was really a mr, because he went on to have a distinguished career as a porno actor in denmark
#7767
<faustwork> the gf wants underwear for xmas
<faustwork> i cant stand going shopping for em tho
<faustwork> i feel like a goon
<faustwork> maybe its because i rub them all on my face
#40051
<Drift3r> !acronym gnu
<Bynarr> Result for "gnu": Gnu's Not Unix
<El-Fish> !acronym MS
<Bynarr> Result for "MS": Combination of Miss and Mrs. (title of address for women)
<Drift3r> !acronym php
<Bynarr> Result for "php": PHP: Hypertext Preprocessor (HTML-embedded scripting language)
<@w00t> !acronym arse
<Bynarr> Result for "arse": Americans for a Responsible Sanitary Experience in the Outdoors
Comment: irc.netronet.com