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#40411
<T-Wolf> man, my girlfriend left me for some faggot named robert
<RdAwG20> you don't live in Hope mills do you?
<T-Wolf> ya, why man?
<RdAwG20> lol, just wondering, was her namne alisson?
<T-Wolf> you mother fucker
Comment: the funniest thing you will read in a while
#429
<thinkr> will the dvd have a special mode to remove jar jar?
#5376
<]RE[-NarcDog> damn thats a hard on...
<]RE[-NarcDog> one*
#30552
<Summoner> Archimedes, Newton and Pascal are playing Hide&Seek.
<Summoner> Archimedes is counting down, Pascal takes off and hides, but Newton takes few steps, turns around, comes behind Archimedes,puls aout a chalk, makes a square 1 meter by 1 meter and steps in it.
<Summoner> Archimedes finishes counting, turns around and, praise the Lord, sees him immideatly:
<Summoner> - A-Ha, Newton!!!
<Summoner> Newton smiles and says:
<Summoner> - No, this is Newton per sqare meter, and that's Pascal.
#32396
<Gothic_CatGirl> Who wants to give me their Billing Information?
#6130
<nail|away> Packaging systems are lame. Tarballs are lamer.
So is source. I install me software with personally magnetized
needles and a steady hand.
#20268
<Torn> WHAT ABOUT WE CHANGE TOPIC, BECAUSE I DON'T GET WHAT YOU ARE TALKING ABOUT
<Bloodshedder> torn's feeble mind cannot understand what we are saying
<ph`> I agree with torn
#296566
<Blaze> whats with all the macro buttons haveing no labels?
<Pryoidain> We're computer people.
<Pryoidain> We don't use labels.
<Pryoidain> Makes us look smarter.
<Pryoidain> They're color coded though.
<Pryoidain> You want the blue button xP
* Pryoidain has quit (Quit: Lost terminal)
* Pryoidain has joined #aftermath
<Pryoidain> NEVERMIND. Do NOT hit the blue button O.O
#310922
<whyrusleeping> last time i went to ikea i left with a bunch of artistic twigs and a different girlfriend
<whyrusleeping> still have the twigs
#80965
<Eidolon> one time
<Eidolon> someone asked me
<Eidolon> if you traveled back in time
<Eidolon> and masturbated your past self
<Eidolon> is that gay?
<PizzaBoy> now the question is, if you COULD go back in time, would you masturbate yourself? >_>
<PizzaBoy> and the BEST answer to that would be 'Only if my future self already did it to me'
#242982
keegan: has anyone made a "Super Lehman Bros" videogame yet?
keegan: you jump and hit the block but instead of coins falling out you get worthless mortgage-backed securities
keegan: also put expensive suits on mario and luigi
#32106
<tinglanchio> kthx
<tlozoot> ok frmo now on don't respond with just "word" or "kthx" beacuse I have to read this stuff
<tlozoot> and when you respond the background goes black and I can't read it
<tlozoot> k????//
<tinglanchio> okay
<tlozoot> very funny asshole.
<tinglanchio> word
#54568
<jkl> "This pornography-related article is a stub. You can help Wikipedia by expanding it."
<jkl> That's the worst pickup line ever.
#16757
{Sexican} oh I heard some legends about a world where you could get a gf and stuff.
{[12Lurk} its a place where women put out
{SoCK} url?
#138027
Ganon: That magnet in the finger idea sounded really awesome, minus the idea of getting some sort of poisoning from the rare-earth metals
Gayo: oh oh dude
Gayo: What if you were a woman and you had MAGNETIC BREAST IMPLANTS.
Katt: I guess that would make you really attractive
Ganon: ...
#1176
(jayo) heh, apparently when i was 4 my dad took me to the pool, i saw a black guy and said "hey dad.. its michael jackson"
#43510
<@Syntacs> I don't know how the Allies managed to win WW2 without quicksave.
<@mittens> meh.
< Akamu> Syntacs: They used wall hacks!
< Akamu> Which resulted in the Axis calling the Allies 'gay' alot.
< Akamu> Don't you know your history?
<@Syntacs> Yeah, I remember. "OMFG quit camping England!" -Hitler
#15000
ð Eviepurr has a magic tail and will grant all wishes
<ieatrocks> i wish your tail to catch on fire
#29625
<J3anyus> just got done playing gunbound
<J3anyus> kthx
<Hatter> what is that j3
* gloone (martin@terrorist.se) has joined #ramen
<J3anyus> it's like worms
<J3anyus> but it's free
<J3anyus> and better
<gloone> are you talking about masturbation again?
<gloone> it's all you do in here
#15668
<amm> I blew up a $590,000 spectrometer today
<amm> xney: yeah, but its covered under insurance
<amm> I quenched an NMR 700mhz magnet which caused an explosion in the
computer room destroying all the sparcs in there :D
#8251
<AnneRobinson^> Do Canadians really like fart jokes for entertainment???
<shagman> fart jokes rock
<shagman> take this classic canadian joke for example
* shagman farts on IEatChildren
#12351
*** Joins: Morrison (Me@bgm-24-95-151-178.stny.rr.com)
<Morrison> HI
<KaeFK> you are not authorized to peruse the content in this channel.
<KaeFK> you shall leave at once or be terminated
<Morrison> Sorry
<Morrison> bye
*** Parts: Morrison (Me@bgm-24-95-151-178.stny.rr.com)
#29055
<Mongvar> .de go develope the pictures for christs sake :P
<Bringa> ahah
<Bringa> gave them to the development store called 'my mum' today
<Bringa> they'll be done by Tuesday
<Bringa> remember, this is good ole germany
<Bringa> nothing works on weekends
<Bringa> and by nothing I mean Leon's mum!
<Bringa> :P
<Woc[food]> haha
<Errtu> dont invoke her voodoo wrath
<Woc[food]> I do hope her workmates don't read the Holy Bible
<Woc[food]> cause it says that if you work on the day of rest, you should be stoned to death :/
<Errtu> i'm stoned to death every day
Comment: #tavern / worldirc
#22967
<sKarab> wtf is a pap smear anyway? <sKarab> it sounds nasty <sKarab> like the sound of plastic hitting moist vagina <sKarab> PAP! <sKarab> ssssmmmeeaaarrrrr
#39544
* TheWoozle wonders if an antipuppy brings unhappiness...
TheWoozle: ...and removes slobber from your face...
TheWoozle: ...and repairs chewed-up toys...
phealy: ...and causes a massive explosion when it touches a puppy!
mundungu: Or eats puppies.
TheWoozle: ...and makes cats feel happy and secure...
mundungu: And helps the mailman deliver his packages?
mundungu: Ahhh, yeah.
* TheWoozle thinks there should be a mind-warp drive which uses the energy released by a puppy-antipuppy reaction ^_^
* TheWoozle wouldn't want to have to clean up afterwards, though.