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#33363
< solerad> oh man
< solerad> my adopted brother
< solerad> had a wet dream that involved my mother :/
< solerad> i wouldn't have known except that
< Supacabra> yikes
< solerad> he told his ENTIRE SCHOOL
< Supacabra> double yikes

#33215
<kisama2> fucking imacs
<kisama2> fucking suck dicks
<kisama2> i'm sitting here trying to use this imac
<kisama2> because all the other computers are broken
<kisama2> or in use
<kisama2> MOTHERFUCKER
<kisama2> mouse freezes every 10 seconds
<kisama2> for about a minute
<kisama2> all i can do is type fucking IRC RAGE
<kisama2> into this channel
<kisama2> its so horrible
Comment: #GeekIssues on EFNet

#297681
Jason: need to buy a few things
Jason: 1, set of goalie gears (most expensive... need to spend time shop around.. would cost $600+ brand new)
Jason: 2, hockey bags (prolly can get what i want for 20 bucks. just need to make sure size is big enough)
Jason: 3, my mom's spoon rack
Me-MSN: why do you need to buy that?
Me-MSN: doesn't your mom already have a nice rack?
Jason: she's asian

#32825
(+Genix) wtf
(+Genix) i just got a spam mail that claimed it would "shrink my penis"
(+BalefireX) did you read it?
(+Genix) :(
(+BalefireX) you didnt need to, did you...
(+Genix) of course it wasn't actually for what it said
(+Genix) it was a porn site
(+Genix) but none the less wtf
Comment: #gideontech

#299795
<popemichael> I was in line to buy a new DVD player. The woman in front of me was having something delivered.
<popemichael> The clerk asked for her 'street name' she replied "I don't have one I go by Shanice."

#4780
<Thumb> do you know of any major organizations that are similar the CDC?
<Lucent> who?
<Thumb> center for disease control
<Lucent> i said WHO
<Thumb> what? i'm asking you
<Lucent> World Health Organization

#8961
[T-Doo|art] when you think about evil, what pops up?
[Rosewood] Daikatana

#8336
<Sanji> I eat people.
<Sanji> I'm a humanitarian

#197
*** topic in #ramen is 'When your cablemodems combine, I am, Captain Pirate! :'

#8535
<BathTub> isn't that your homepage JtHM?
<JtHM> no, mine is www.bathtubsdenofaggotry.com
<BathTub> ah yeah that shrine site you made
<JtHM> worshipping the gayest man alive

#47823
<TheYamiUsagi> Halo is like Christianity. It's probably okay, but the ignorant fan base ruined it for me.

#309228
<arieldanielle> There's an apartment complex in which a dead girl was found recently
<arieldanielle> Now they have a sign outside advertising "killer leasing specials"

#42950
<froggie> I got a cool joke. What's the difference between a 15 year old and a 17 year old?
<d4nny> I don't know
<froggie> see.. that's going to get you in big trouble, one day

#59840
< RichiH> imagine you are a reporter
< RichiH> a tornado hunter in the US
< RichiH> you see a person clinging to a lamppost, trying to survive
< RichiH> you are in a _heavy_ car, and thus totally save even right next to the eye of the thing
< RichiH> so you drive nearer to the scene
< RichiH> you see that the person trying to survive is george w. bush
< RichiH> so now you have two options:
< RichiH> either you save him, having him in debt forever, becoming famous for life and probably getting a large sum from him in return
< RichiH> or you let him die, making the pictures of your life, getting fame and money too, but having a very powerful clan against you for life
< RichiH> so, what do you choose?
< RichiH> video or photo?

#7478
[Demon5] ;p
[far_call] what's that symbol supposed to mean?  "I have a scar on my cheek and I'm a mouth breather"?

#305379
<guest_71> nick\ totallyhopeless
<guest_71> nick/ totallyhopeless
<guest_71> nick/totallyhopeless
<guest_71> nick\totallyhopeless
<guest_71> why isnt the nickname changer working?
Comment: #computerhope on irc.mibbit.com

#21974
<create> <nikki> can you tell me what a clitoris is because someone is asking me about mine and I don't know what the hell it is
<joedirt> isnt that a french pastry?

#51619
eefstr_12: theres no fresh water where I am, we have them delivered
sze_mai: here's what you do
sze_mai: feed a couple of monkeys salt and follow them
sze_mai: you'll find a water source for sure
eefstr_12: one question, where do I get monkeys
sze_mai: dunno, I'm an expert in water, not monkeys.

#28992
<icmp> last night i went out with this chick, she wanted to give me a handjob i said no way my hands are just fine thank you and left promptly..what a weirdo!

#33983
<kurai> You know .. sometimes I long for the days when spam was just for pr0n, rather than shitty meds
<kurai> At least they included pics to look at while you were deleting it

#201
<iMike> the bible should be rewritten to more common language
<DigDug> yeah, like c++ or perl
<D1> in comic book form

#11427
<DannyBoy> Hey CB, do you have any old website interface templates laying around that you have no use for? =8)
<Cowboy_w3rk> er
<Cowboy_w3rk> <html><body>insert content</body></html>
<Cowboy_w3rk> there ya go
<DannyBoy> wonderful
<DannyBoy> hey, that looks like shit

#30378
[r0bz0r] How do you copy the text from this IRC in case there's something funny that we might wanna submit to bash.org?
Comment: in  #kingsofchaos (chatchannel.org)

#8330
<AgntBukk> I played grand theft auto 3 the other day.
<spacetwin> how was it!
<AgntBukk> I beat up some chick.
<AgntBukk> and then I kicked her repeatedly in the head until she died.
<spacetwin> haha
<AgntBukk> so, all in all, I was happy with the experience.

#39214
<The_GGA> But ninjas never lose a fight. They just don't.
<desplesda> what if you've got two teams of ninjas fighting each other? who wins then?
<The_GGA> The ninjas.
<desplesda> you make a good point

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