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#8873
* Crimson has joined #arsclan
<stargurl> hello
<Sinned> hello
<Crimson> hello
<Griz> hello.jpg

#48810
<+Toba> fuck
<+Toba> I deleted the wrong file
<+Toba> yay backups
<%CompHobbyist> ahahaha
<+Toba> TAB COMPLETE IS NEVER YOUR FRIEND
<%CompHobbyist> no it isn't Twiz
<%CompHobbyist> errrrr
<%CompHobbyist> I mean
<%CompHobbyist> Toba
<%CompHobbyist> *&@#*ING TAB COMPLETE
Comment: #WPI

#2067
<tobes> Have fun at work? ;)
<Morbii> not particularly ;)
<Morbii> been back home a few hours tho
<Morbii> anything related to the word "work" isn't fun generally :P
<Morbii> pornstars may see things differently, but I wouldn't know
<Morbii> heh!
<tobes> Actually, that would probably get to be a pain in the ass.

#3230
<NtG> you know theres one thing I love about the internet
<NtG> theres such a multitude of repulsive fat ugly chick pictures

#9154
<Skitzo> fuck my image, i get off on huge horse wangs inside of human female vaginas
<Skitzo> esp when they fill with cum and it gushes out
<Skitzo> yeah
<Skitzo> bestiality :D
<Skitzo> this is what happens when you go to church as a child and attend christian private schools, folks
<Skitzo> <--------- end result

#61358
< withnail> i read a true story in a book today, cracked me up. these guys are on a picket line for striking dock workers or something, and they have a snowman there with a toy cops helmet on and a frown made of stones there. anyway, a senior police officer in his range rover drives past and calls over some of the policemen supervising the picket asking about the snowman and saying he wanted it gone (what a dick) the other police said "well we feel a bit silly kicking down their snowman" so the top brass guy goes "fine! i'll do it myself!" and drives into the snowman......what he didn't know was
< withnail> that it was built over a concrete bollard. wrecked seven shades of shit out of his car

#34214
<rhraz_w3rk> recession? pshh, i haven't seen one hobo yet!
<ESD-Wyrk> that's cause you need to go outside to see one
<ESD-Wyrk> most of them aren't 'online'

#302082
<Kolin> just googled myself and my dad no longer comes before me
<rye`sky> it's more romantic if you come at the same time
<Kolin> thats sick

#33543
<TheDarkOfKnight> When I was a seinor in high school we had to make a video and had to have blood packs. The best blood packs are made from condoms.
<TheDarkOfKnight> We had the following on the checkout counter: 1 Box of Trojan Magnum condoms, 2 Bottles of Corn oil, 4 Bottles of red food color, 2 Super 8 video cassettes and 1 Roll of duct tape.
<TheDarkOfKnight> I have never before gotten weirder looks.

#297784
<Alice> what's the most turned-on you guys have ever been?
<Bob> first time i seen my current girlfriend naked.. handjob, blowjob and titjob.. god damn.
<Carlos> Bob: you mean you jerked off her tit? does that even feel good for girls?

#8441
<Doc> ok... kitchens clean, bathrooms clean
<Doc> thats the two easiest to clean rooms of the house done...
<cactoid> is that because you always eat out and you never shower?

#125661
<@DJ> Oh man.
<@DJ> I got so excited.
<@DJ> I saw Pokemon the First Season on sale.
<@DJ> And almost bought it.
<@DJ> Then I remembered I was 18.

#297065
Josh: it's amazing that people don't simply think "apostrophe's replace missing letters in a contraction" and use them correctly
Mike: ...please tell me that was intentional and sarcastic
Mike: because otherwise it's going in quotes.txt. and nothing ever gets removed from quotes.txt

#305903
<bucketmouse> you heard about her birthday right
<stef> no
<bucketmouse> he didn't mention it at all so she asked a mutual friend of theirs
<bucketmouse> the dude tipped her of that he was talking about throwing her a portal themed birthday party
<bucketmouse> so she gets overly excited/hopeful thinking it's going to be romantic or something
<stef> portal isn't romantic though
<bucketmouse> so on the day of she wakes up, he's at work, she walks into the kitchen
<stef> this is going to be terrible isnt it
<bucketmouse> on the counter there's a cheap dollar-store helium balloon, a joint, and a box of debbie crocker cake mix
<bucketmouse> and a scrap of paper reading: 'u will be baked then there will be cake'
Comment: she dumped him over this

#463
"The cheek of every American must tingle with shame as he reads the silly,
flat, and dishwatery utterances of the man who has to be pointed out to
intelligent foreigners as the President of the United States."
The Chicago Times review of After Lincoln's Gettysburg Address.

#34924
<lolboy> she can't hear because of the penisbirds
<@Pi> lol
<@penisfish> they go CAWK
<@penisfish> CAWK CAWK CAWK CAWK CAWK CAWK

#44924
<CAPS-LOCK> ARRGH
<CAPS-LOCK> As I unplugged a 4.3Gb SCSI HD, three of the power connector pins broke
<CAPS-LOCK> Equipped with only a 45-watt glass iron with a flat tip and a 3/4 used spool of silver-bearing solder I set out to reattach them
<CAPS-LOCK> After 45 minutes of burning my fingers trying to avoid knocking the damn things over with my gigantic iron, I finally managed to get them all fixed
<CAPS-LOCK> I gleefully went upstairs and attempted to reinstall the HD in its new home.
<CAPS-LOCK> but as I plugged in the power connector...
<CAPS-LOCK> ALL FOUR PINS BROKE!!!!
<CAPS-LOCK> My belly is so full of hate right now...
<overridex> CAPS-LOCK: hmm.... that's kind of like killing a weed in your lawn with a bazooka while leaving everything else in tact ;)
Comment: Woops, trimmed too much off that last one.

#1903
<Delusion> "US attacked by four concurrent hijacking incidents. US gas stations celebrate by immediate 25 cent price increase."

#2041
<Mr_Durden> no wonder superman's ship is powered by the only thing that can kill him
<Mr_Durden> it was designed by a canadian

#1280
<disgrunt> New "Britney"'s born in the US every year:  1,483.
<disgrunt> New "Dick Tease"'s born in the US every year:  3.
<disgrunt> That's the funniest shit I've ever seen.
<disgrunt> How would you like to be named Dick Tease?
<fade_> haha
<fade_> well, britney sure is a dick tease
<cout> disgrunt: I'd go by "Richard"

#64822
[DAY] Trinexx: I saw the most awesome Windows error today: "A malicious program has attempted to shut down Windows. As a precaution, Windows was shut down."

#1353
<Gayo> I went with purple even though two characters wear purple and the first city is made entirely of purple buildings.
<Gayo> Which means that so far the only green is in the little "occupied" lights above the bedroom doors.
<Sharkey> ... that sounds really familiar for some reason. Probably reminding me of some retarded childrens program.
<Sharkey> Something where all the people are purple and live in purple houses and have purple lawns, until mysterious green men come from the moon and everybody learns the wonders of ethnic diversity.
<Sharkey> Well slap ma fro! Where da purple woman at? Where da purple woman at? "Kill the greenie!"

#295307
Francis: Someday, I'm going to rule the internet with an iron fist
Duo: not with a name like Francis.
Duo: more like a delicately manicured, leather-gloved hand
StoneCypher: lightly perfumed
Duo: and lotioned.

#10904
<StrScream> my pants are back up, after almost no downtime in the last 2 years.

#22468
--> The_Ents (~trees@the.darkforrest.net) has joined #Isengard
<-- Saruman has quit (Excess Flood)

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