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#6649
(talking about a guy that worked at the world trade center)
<@PowrSlave> this poor fuck is getting divorced cuz of 9/11
<@PowrSlave> lol
<@PowrSlave> his wife filed
<@PowrSlave> he didnt go into work that morning and went to his mistresses' house instead
<@PowrSlave> had his phone off
<nonzeRo> haha
<nonzeRo> lucky guy
<@PowrSlave> he turned it on at around 11:00 and his wife was like "OMFG ARE YOU OKAY WHERE ARE YOUR?"
<@PowrSlave> hes like "im at the office honey. whats the matter?"
<@PowrSlave> lol

#4909
<langdon> *** Unable to resolve 255.255.255.255
<langdon> how do i get that IP?
<langdon> is that like.
<langdon> when the internet is full?

#24177
<Faight> Reproduction is stupid.
<AndrewLB> You want sex, don't you?
<Faight> I have a 6 year old brother.
<Faight> He's an annoying little bastard, but I love him.
<Faight> =/
<AndrewLB> That was quite possibly THE most disturbing answer you could give.

#13850
<LeanaAnne> Oooh, I guess lacrosse builds up the ol' ass muscles ^___^
<Seiya> Ha, so does being gay. :x

#56390
ELLIS THOMAS : My question is HOW CAN I SWEAR ON BBERG?
BLOOMBERG HELP DESK : Hello Ellis, there are certain words that are restricted on Bloomberg's messaging system.  If you would like to simulate a swear word, you can substitute a letter with a symbol, such as an asterisk
ELLIS THOMAS : THANK YOU, THAT'S F*CKING FANTASIC.
BLOOMBERG HELP DESK : Is there anything else I can assist you with?

#55107
<Botje> i'm waiting for vim's omnicompletion to become intelligent
<decay> omnicompletion?
<decay> what does it do?
<decay> complete on all available sources? :)
<infi> you type in #!/usr/bin/perl -w, hit TAB, and it writes your program for you
<Botje> infi: that's for vim7.43
<infi> these newfangled neural DWIM interfaces kick ass
<decay> only question left: my editor wrote the wrong program for me, what can i do?
<integral> press tab again to begin cycling through the programs

#302761
< sklnd> i was an intern at jpmc for two years
< sklnd> i lost like 50 million dollars one day in intra-bank funds
< sklnd> by fucking up a ftp upload
Comment: #cobol

#8479
<Kaff> its saturday night. what are you doing here
<Kaff> i thought you'd have too much of a social life.
<spoob> Parts of me love interacting with other parts of me, but as a whole, I'm about as popular and loved as jamesm
<Kaff> oh. so you're a dead shit.
<spoob> Succinct, cruel, and accurate

#53569
<Jarn> I really need to go outside more often... I just realized New Years had gone by when I noticed that the timestamp on when a friend had signed off messenger read "2006".

#2506
<Dracon> weird.. seems like no matter what i do, cpu usage never shows 0.0%.

#1018
(SpAc3d) i hate when [movie groups] release shitty quality stuff like TS and Cam's
(SpAc3d) its a fuckin waste of space
(mistical) like Hannibal *upsidedown cam* *real* *subtitled* *in japanesse*

#336
<nullgod> I'm not quite sure who slack is for, it's harder then REdHat, so it's not for newbies, it's less secure then FreeBSD so it's not for experts, and it's not pretty so it's not for desktops.
<DigDug> slack is for linux zealots :-D

#8277
(Moose_): what's your language of choice ?
(rich): english?

#56571
<AlexFili> i am a n00b, what do u expect?
[...]
<Bjarni> AlexFili: you need to learn stuff to reach the n00b level

#61709
<ToxicFrog|AFK> Hmm.
<ToxicFrog|AFK> Ok, question for the USians in the channel.
<ToxicFrog|AFK> First of all, the background - as a dual citizen, once I reach a certain point, I have to file US income tax returns even if I don't actually owe any taxes. And my dad has been giving me an overview of the US tax system.
<ToxicFrog|AFK> So, my question is this:
<ToxicFrog|AFK> What the hell?
<MyCatOwnz> Bwahahahahaha!
<@Tekkie007> Always happy to lend a hand to the CAians.
<ToxicFrog|AFK> Is the IRS made up entirely of monstrosities from outside the walls of reality that are inimical to life as we know it?
<Geminii> Yes.
<pixel> Yep.
<Geminii> Next question?
<@Tekkie007> And you've caught on to our tax system amazingly fast.
<ToxicFrog|AFK> Does your government hate students? Were the tax forms copied from the crawling, N-dimensional writings of madness itself on the walls of Rl'yeh, or are they the result of some even more malevolent process?
<Geminii> Yes, yes, and yes.
* ToxicFrog|AFK flails
Comment: #tsc on nightstar

#6426
<BadlandZ> So, what's new, where are the bots?
<Sprout> they are eating lunch
<BadlandZ> heh.. together?
<Sprout> do you ever see bots eating with people?

#2048
<Birdzii> i've got this fucked rash all over my body
<Morbii> heh
* Slander takes a step back from birdsigh
<Birdzii> heh
<Birdzii> sore throat + rash
<Morbii maybe you're allergic to masturbation
<Morbii> jkjk ;P
<Birdzii> I would have been dead long ago then

#17945
<Iggz> screw it
<Iggz> i'm gonna put this cottage cheese on my sandwhich
<Iggz> and no ones gonna stop me

#18271
<Shrapnull> It's not how the boat floats, or the size of the mast, but the motion of the ocean
<Aduro> lol
<Tiffy> haha
<cryptonix> just hope your seamen don't have scurvey :D

#38913
<+DX_> Neo: do they spell porn "pourn" in britain?

#28691
<influx> heh what is it with irc and gay jokes?
<zaggy> influx: they go together like my penis and your juicy ass

#265195
<Gayo> google added gif emoticons to gmail.
<mathrick> they did?
<mathrick> FUCKERS
<Gayo> "If you're tired of not being able to find the right words to express yourself in your messages, emoticons are here to help."
<Gayo> Oh Christine, I love you so much more than my crass tongue can ever express! Let me show you how I feel with this smiley face in a party hat.

#7359
* stormo is potentially cosplaying at manifest this year
<DannyS> stormo: you'll still lose all respect
<DannyS> i mean, it's like voluntarily going out in front of traffic and ramming a set of computer speakers up your arse
<DannyS> except the latter gets you more friends and respect

#294895
<&mezzanine> Congratulations
<&mezzanine> The document located at <whitehouse.gov> was successfully checked as XHTML 1.0 Transitional.
<&mezzanine> oh my
<&mezzanine> change has indeed come

#17894
<Polaris[LovesChii]> Speaking of poke 4
<Polaris[LovesChii]> I wonder if anyone has some pokemon pr0n
<Polaris[LovesChii]> Like I said before.........Misty IS HOT!!!!!!!!!!
<Polaris[LovesChii]> Squirtle isn't too bad either

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