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#152644
<Crucial> whats a quick way to push ipconfig /release, ipconfig /renew to 50 or
so workstations
<Mo> cycle power to the building
#11066
InVerSeX: I scanned my penis in a flatbed scanner once.
The Spunn: did it hurt?
InVerSeX: No, I didn't close the lid.
InVerSeX: It was only a 14" scanner.
The Spunn: Ah, so you couldn't scan the whole thing.
InVerSeX: Exactly.
The Spunn: I had to fold mine in half to fit it all on the 14" scanner, that's the part that hurt the most.
InVerSeX: Well, I scanned mine limp and then used photoshop to get a stiffy.
#3937
<Nall> type /nick newname to fix your name
*** amit is now known as newname
#25239
<@Kamakazi> i've seen a cat land on it's head
<@Kamakazi> it was my fault
<@Kamakazi> i tried to make it do 2 backflips
<@Kamakazi> it was at my friends house
<@Kamakazi> i wanted to see if they ALWAYS landed on their feet
<@Kamakazi> so i dropped him and he did.
<@Kamakazi> and i was like hmm...
<@Kamakazi> i wonder how many backflips he could do then
#11520
<jre> If you were a Nazi and had 2 hostages but only 1 bullet, who would you shoot? Some normal crew-cut soldier or G.I. Joe?
<Gudrow> I'd shoot myself because Nazis are assholes.
#25302
<m477[Lain]> Customer: "I don't have a cdrom drive, and the CD is too big to fit in the floppy drive. And the software store won't take it back. So you have to help me install this, because it's all your fault. If you had sold me the version of Windows I wanted, I wouldn't have had to buy Windows 95."
#69910
<@Sid> see
<@Sid> it's possible that she wasn't killed on the third
<@Sid> and she met up with hans reiser a coupla days later
<@HrdwrBoB> true
<@Sid> and he killed her to death in the passenger seat of his honda
<@HrdwrBoB> or transported the body
<@HrdwrBoB> unlikely death in car
<@HrdwrBoB> it would have been messy
<@Sid> then laid the bits of corpse out in the woods in a nice b-tree, for O(log(n)) retrieval later
Comment: irc.ragingfist.net
#215897
<kris> damn 1337, now everyone's numberplate is talking to me
#305289
<dr_jkl> I HAVE A THREE DAY WEEKEND AND A SOLDERING IRON.
<dr_jkl> i am going to have so much fun. :D
#16040
<Josho> i HATE
<Josho> the beastie boys.
<Amanda_> Their talent is INTERGALACTIC
<Amanda_> Saying you hate them is a form of SABOTAGE
<Amanda_> GIRLS are always huge fans
<Josho> ....................................................
<Amanda_> Looks like you need some BRASS MONKEY
#14444
<tokage> im a pathetic fanboy when it comes to king
<tokage> I'd read tampon labels if someone told me he wrote them
#2166
<grey> wow
<grey> i didn't realise afghanistan had enough infrastructure for two nights' worth of air attacks
#50774
<@philb> I have a new task at work, I have to improve traffic to the website by not changing anything or advertising
<@philb> I've decided to use chanting
<@philb> I'll tail -f the logs of the webservers on a giant projector screen in an abandoned church
<@philb> and chant a lot.
#34176
<Rjx> what
<Rjx> ian curtis killed himself?
<timmo> rjx: yeah, a long ass time ago
<Rjx> I only found out kurt cobain died like 2 years ago
<timmo> ...
<timmo> youre not up on the news
<Rjx> no, I'm not
Comment: #GeekIssues EFNet (March 2004)
#83243
<Grey> Programming languages are like Pokemon moves; you can only really know like four of them at once without having to forget about another one
#17297
<Enhanced> but ya i'm gonna paint my intake on my car
<Enhanced> can i use spray paint?
<NT5> ummm..... what other kind of paint did you think there was available?? latex flat wall?
<Roppongi> finger paint
<Enhanced> i just dont wanna use paintbrush kind of paint
<NT5> lol
<NT5> paintbrush kind of paint.... that's good
<NT5> get out the roller billy-bubba
<Enhanced> well shit i dont know anything about paint
<Enhanced> except finger paint
<NT5> we gonna paint us a car
#30755
—› join: (D99) (Anon@MAK2237-A.STUDENT.TCU.EDU)
—› mode: (ChanServ) sets (+o D99)
—› quit: (Demize99) (Anon@Demize99.user.gamesnet) (Read error: Connection reset by peer)
(@D99) this is retarded
(@D99) I wouldn't stay connected to my own cock if i had to access it through TCU's internet
#1739
<Slyfox> I want to make a FPS that mixes the geo-mod techonology of Red Faction, the finesse and action of Max Payne, the gore and damage map feature in Soldier of Fortune, and the story and intrigue of Half-Life. I'll call it "Can't Fuck With This".
#296934
<Indogutsu> Is that that Basshunter song?
<Slime_Master> Yeah
<Indogutsu> ...only in Sweden can a dance rap song about IRC hit #1 on the charts.
#14862
<_Peachy> i soooo need a t0mp00ter
<theraven> a what?
<_Peachy> a t0mp00ter sirry!
<theraven> i get you now
#16858
<manero> MANLY THINGS:
<manero> 1) JOHN WAYNE
<manero> 2) WAR MOVIES
<manero> 3) BEER BRATS
<rebrane-> 3) WAR MOVIES WITH JOHN WAYNE
<rebrane-> 4) FARTING
<manero> 5) LARGE CIGARS
<rebrane-> 6) CARS
<rebrane-> 7) FIRE
<manero> 8) BOWLING
<rebrane-> 9) CARS ON FIRE
<ian> 10) BEAR SUIT
<rebrane-> 11) GUNS
<rebrane-> 12) GUITARS
<skitzo> 11) ANAL SEX WITH YOUR BEST FRIEND IN THE TOOL SHED
<Primary> 13) JOHN WAYNE'S GUN
<rebrane-> there's already an 11, skitzo
#18160
<MaxPower> so I'm on this ftp site today
<thammy> haha
<thammy> that sounds like the beginning of a bad geek joke
#39228
<JaneLame> i sent help@google.com an invitation to gmail, and at the "attached note" section i wrote - HOW DO I SEND AN INVITATION???!!!
<JaneLame> so they just sent me another invitation
<JaneLame> i think i'm gonna send one back
<issuez> haha
<issuez> IS THIS HOW?
<JaneLame> :D
Comment: #geekissues
#64822
[DAY] Trinexx: I saw the most awesome Windows error today: "A malicious program has attempted to shut down Windows. As a precaution, Windows was shut down."
#66025
<xevious> hey did you guys hear that they are recalling all of steve irwins sunscreen line?
<Rofflecop> WHY?
<xevious> apparently it doesnt protect against deadly rays
Comment: #lsg [efnet]