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#32531
<DimaV> http://bash.cx/?search=Gothic_CatGirl&order=quote_id&sort=asc&limit=25&approved=0
<Gothic_CatGirl> Holy crap
<Gothic_CatGirl> That's a lot
<DimaV> ur popular
<DimaV> ur like a porn star, only we get to talk to u
#307519
<Fax> have to say that's the first time I've had a guy get pissed that I'm *not* banging his daughter
#8863
<Bikky> I've been staring at fserves so long I don't know whether I need a shit or a haircut
#310343
< yates> let me read and then perhaps ask more intelligent questions.
< o11c> pretty sure that's never happened in this channel before ^
Comment: freenode ##c++
#6478
<HevyD> yea, one time I got caught masturbating and I yelled at my dad telling him to go get help cause I had him caught and I needed backup, boy that was akward
#57847
(Goat25) what is the volume of a pizza of radius z and thickness a ?
(Goat25) answer: pi z z a
#214164
AbortedFetus has left irc.slashnet.org (Ping timeout)
<orbofwisdom> man that was a good burger
<Kitsune> O_o
<Kitsune> did you.. eat... AbortedFetus?
#60930
<Greenbox> the place i ordered chicken parmesan from forgot the chicken
<Greenbox> so instead of calling and complaining, like a normal person would
<Greenbox> I used asterisk and called them from the number of the department of health
<Greenbox> and told them a random screening of their food had just been conducted, and they failed miserably
<Greenbox> so they were ordered not to serve food until an inspection later today
<Ignite> ROFL
<Kevin> rofl
<Ignite> hahahahahhaha
<Kevin> <3 Greenbox
Comment: #controlthesystem on irc.xelix.net
#29317
<hypr> im gay
<J3anyus> appparently i'm gay now.
<hypr> fuck you, i was gay first
<J3anyus> we can be gay together :>
#11832
<diospadre> NO MORE FINALS
<diospadre> im done.
<BuddyLee> good then go update
<diospadre> no must christmas shop
<BuddyLee> no staff job comes first
<diospadre> no buying stuff comes first cant let the terrorists win
<BuddyLee> LOL!\
#38044
(StickMutilator) I was stuck in Mario for a long time.........I didn't realise you could jump
#306155
<Trinexx> man, I should go hang out in a linux support channel. I'd fit right in
<Trinexx> not only did I not answer ELHN's question, I went on a tangent based on an assumption where I told him that what he's doing is wrong
<Trinexx> I then vaguely insulted him
#2792
<pupkick> 37?
<devinfo> i heard 37 is any 3 digit multiple of 37, when the digits are cyclicly permutated is still divisible by 37, ie: 37*13 = 481, 148/37 = 4, 37*11 = 407, 740/37 = 20, or oddly enough, this works in other bases too... 0x37 * 0x19 = 0x55F. 0xF55 / 0x37 = 0x47, or you sucked 37 dicks?
#297567
<jgw> huh apparently "blackberry" means any phone with a physical keyboard and now this dumb fucking end user, who i graciously agreed to help with their personal phone is now pissed because i recommended a piece of third party software for the blackberry to connect to our calendaring server, and it does not work with their "blackberry" aka a Palm Fucking Centro
<jgw> i need to document this incident and point people requesting favors to it with a firm "no!"
<jgw> facepalm
<RangerRick> jgw: don't you mean, faceblackberry?
#78595
<DinkyDogg_> worst geeky erotic fiction EVAR
<DinkyDogg_> vista as a metaphor for a beatiful woman
<proudfoot> vista is perhaps a better metaphor for a woman who tries to be beautiful, but doesnt succeed, and has many, many, issues
<proudfoot> and happens to be very, very, insecure
<proudfoot> she also has the annoying habit of asking you if its ok to do anything
#301836
<@PZT> "I want you to taste these," she panted as she unbuttoned her blouse, revealing two full-grown California grizzly bears. I was on the ground before it even clicked. I glanced upwards and wove my head to the left as a set of 2" claws plunged downward at me. They grazed the side of my face. It stung like hell. One of them was sitting on my left arm; I couldn't move. I felt around for the coat hanger she'd thrown to the floor just minutes ago. A careless move for an agent, I thought to myself. I twisted it around my wrist, forming a crude hook, and jabbed at the one on top of me. It rolled over, uttering primal groans of agony as blood dripped from its eyes. I slashed blindly to my left. I didn't break the fur, but it was enough. The second bear shifted its weight, and I was able to pry my arm free. Still half-naked, I grabbed the padlocked Armani suitcase and I stumbled out the motel room door.
<Scizor300> What the hell?
* Stoney is now known as Stonaway
<@PZT> I swore silently to myself as I dashed toward the dimly lit lobby. She'd been one of them all along. An agent. The Movement had warned me not to let down my cover, even for a minute. Why hadn't I listened? A prostitute, in the beat-down slums of Madrid? What was I thinking? Her name... Bertha. Bear-tha. She'd been dangling it in front of my face the entire night, but I had been too horny to listen. Or care, for that matter.
<+Mach> What the fuck?
<@PZT> I burst out the front door and ran down the street towards a departing bus. I didn't care where it was going; no human can outrun a hungry grizzly bear on foot. I heard screams behind me, followed by roars and a horrible gnashing sound. I stuck my good arm between the closing doors, pried them open and stepped on board. I threw a few coins at the flabbergasted bus driver and made my way to a seat, ignoring the similarly confused faces around me. It didn't matter to me; the honey was safe. That was all that mattered nowadays.
Comment: #armonte's_channel on irc.esper.net
#49794
[Mediator] FUCK FUCK FUCK
[Mediator] Ok so there was this gel pack with my heatsink
[Mediator] And it says all over it "Do not eat"
[Mediator] So its been lying on my desk for like 4 days
[Mediator] So I stabbed it with a screw driver today out of bordom
[Mediator] and some little balls came out
[Mediator] And they were clear
[Mediator] and I was liek "neat"
[Tangerz] :\
[Mediator] So out of curiousity I licked one
[Mediator] And now my tongue is melting off
Comment: Aftermath of a previous quote. #runeweb on irc.anoxs.net
#301628
<pnbeast> How do you feel about neural networks, HappyHobo?
<HappyHobo> Is that like Amway?
<pnbeast> It's almost exactly not like Amway, HappyHobo.
#5449
<oogie> I wonder would oral sex would feel like from one of those african women with the big plate in their lower lip
<oogie> you could have a little tray to rest your nuts on on her lower lip
#1968
<MrSede> If it could balance a beer on its head without spilling I'd give it props, but any rodent can balance a pancake on its noggin
#310368
<hep> would anyone like to sign up for our trolling ghostwriting service?
<hep> for the busy professional who still wants to troll
<hep> you just give us your nick
<hep> and we troll as you
#855
<EFX> does the cum in an australian girls throat go down counter clockwise?
#13630
<Robertuybrush> HELLOW, I'M ROBERTUYBRUSH THREEPWOOD!
<Robertuybrush> I JUST WANT TO BE A PIRATE
<FortKeeper> To become a pirate, turn off CAPS-LOCK
#301716
S: Cute coworker is cute
Mabbo: Don't you have a boyfriend?
S: I have a boyfriend, not a visual impairment
#10720
Bongoshock : the penis is NOT a muscle!
BeHeMoTh101 : IS TOO
BeHeMoTh101 : organ.
Bongoshock : from the root ORgasm
Bongoshock : ORganic =ORgasmic
BeHeMoTh101 : from the root ORECK
BeHeMoTh101 : the bug killing guys
Bongoshock : 10 pounds of suction power?
BeHeMoTh101 : so really the penis is just an evolved potato bug sprayer