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#297918
<Fyad> When I bought siemens cellphone, siemens sold its cellular section. When I bought yakumo screen, yakumo got bunkrupt. When I bought fujitsu-siemens laptop, siemens sold its share.
<Fyad> Just curious what to buy next...
<r_heart> apple
<hoobsta> Apple
<sailo> apple
#104003
<Aoi-chan> everyone's first vi session. ^C^C^X^X^X^XquitqQ!qdammit[esc]qwertyuiopasdfghjkl;:xwhat
#14374
<@jaffy> how the fuck does my moniter get so dirty, its like some cunt eats his meals off it while im asleep
#33222
<_Zippo^_> I see Goatse as an Internet Initiation. If you haven't seen goatse, and you're using the net, you don't belong.
<ninj4> yeah. Once you hit like 13, then its like part of becoming a man
#7192
<gedamo> Some of our customers used to call their computer boxes the "brain" and it led tothem calling up saying things like "My brain isn'tworking"
#60930
<Greenbox> the place i ordered chicken parmesan from forgot the chicken
<Greenbox> so instead of calling and complaining, like a normal person would
<Greenbox> I used asterisk and called them from the number of the department of health
<Greenbox> and told them a random screening of their food had just been conducted, and they failed miserably
<Greenbox> so they were ordered not to serve food until an inspection later today
<Ignite> ROFL
<Kevin> rofl
<Ignite> hahahahahhaha
<Kevin> <3 Greenbox
Comment: #controlthesystem on irc.xelix.net
#4407
<EnochRoot> BREAKING NEWS: President Bush has declared a state of Boogie Madness. Preliminary operations will begin at 1100 Hours.
#60043
<withnail> this is weird, i've been having more of a social life recently and missed loads of irc, and when you come back it's like missing loads of episodes in a soap opera. new characters enter, people change. so anyway, anyone dead or anything?
#26401
<`dsx-efnex> counterfieting canadian money is about as useful as cloning the french.
#9985
<HankMcCoy> I am so fucking h0nry today, I don't know what's wrong with me. It's like someone is licking the crotch of my voodoo doll.
#302269
Vasir: there was an evil dick staring at me all day
Mel: O_O WTF.. um are you okay?
Vasir: yeah i'm fine. it was starring me down through the windows all day though. i'm pretty sure it had malicious intent
Mel: Are you okay?
Vasir: yes.
*10 minutes or so pass*
Vasir: you know Mel, we never talk much anymore...
Mel: I know, but Vasir, why are you talking about dicks?
Vasir: I'm not?
Vasir: OH FUCK. I meant DUCK! AN EVIL DUCK WAS STARRING AT ME! NOT AN EVIL DICK!
#20513
(`dM`): I took a girl on a date to a lan party.. she seemed throughly bored
(DaMuppet): lol
(doggie^): hahaha
(DaMuppet): omfg dM
(DaMuppet): you;re joking
(DaMuppet): pls tell me u r
(`dM`): no. = I'm not joking. it was an impromptu lan party. and then the guys started trading porn
(`dM`): it was downhill from there
#53608
ChaOSv2: hehe xbox 360 ... 'end up where you started'
#26339
<Xerox> ...Oh god. Nintendo gave me a preview DVD of apparently quite a lot of their games. I have no DVD player. I do, however, have a PS2. CAN ANYONE SEE THE IRONY HERE!?
#15647
<CaMR0N> why does everyone call me cumron?
<drunkers> probably and honest mistake
<CaMR0N> but everyone?
<drunkers> did you tell them you were gay?
<CaMR0N> yes cause im honest with everyone
<drunkers> maybe its not an honest mistake
#9906
<rworks> But seriously, I wish Steve Jobs would accidentally drag himself to the trash can.
#50946
<Thuryn> i figure, carry the machine gun for business, and the rapier for pleasure
<Thuryn> but don't forget the dagger in both cases, for close quarters. and perhaps a 9mm ;)
<biform_3> i don't think we can be friends
<Thuryn> :(
#37249
<toku-sama> pagefault calls his father "sperm"
<toku-sama> and his mom "egg"
<pagefault> toku calls his parents test tube and eye dropper
#6649
(talking about a guy that worked at the world trade center)
<@PowrSlave> this poor fuck is getting divorced cuz of 9/11
<@PowrSlave> lol
<@PowrSlave> his wife filed
<@PowrSlave> he didnt go into work that morning and went to his mistresses' house instead
<@PowrSlave> had his phone off
<nonzeRo> haha
<nonzeRo> lucky guy
<@PowrSlave> he turned it on at around 11:00 and his wife was like "OMFG ARE YOU OKAY WHERE ARE YOUR?"
<@PowrSlave> hes like "im at the office honey. whats the matter?"
<@PowrSlave> lol
#116343
<IdleFire> back later perhaps, playing aoe with the girlfriend
* Quits: IdleFire (IdleFire@idlefire.net) (Quit: IdleFire)
<MadManMarkAu> Wait, he has a girlfriend, and he prefers to play AoE?
<MasterCJ> thats nothing
<MasterCJ> once he was in bed with her
<MasterCJ> naked
<MasterCJ> and was on irc
<MasterCJ> and she was playing aoe
<MadManMarkAu> :s
#37025
<Stryker> Seriously. I've had no money since buying an Xbox.
<Stryker> Fortunately, I can use it as a bed.
Comment: #rm2k on irc.dynastynet.net
#307252
HelgeSverre: ....
Lemmiwinks: You make some very good points
Lemmiwinks: .,.,, mine are all wonky
#126370
<pthree> it came to light the other day that I don't own any clothes that I picked out myself
<pthree> I'm a 28yr old barbie doll for my wife
#6607
<niff|n> why do you have so much porn Greebo?
<Greebo> 'cos i like masturbating, niffin.
#40674
<@lucid> I need something to do.
<@lucid> I dont start work until tommorrow
<@PJD> hrmm
<@PJD> watch porn
<@lucid> nah, thats a night thing
<@PJD> order some pizza
<@lucid> im broke
<@PJD> hrmm
<@lucid> hah
<@lucid> I have herb and diet coke
<@lucid> thats about it
<@PJD> go to a mall and tell kids santa claus doesnt exist