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#309421
<luz> i'm dizzy and it hurts to breathe
<LAMMJohnson> luz: Lay down and stop breathing
#8940
«@MegaFrogg» wow... these spammers sure are subtle
«@MegaFrogg» [%] added [GIVE_ME_UR_PUSSY] (*!*getrjtjty@203.135.12.*) to the Shitlist
#6912
<pvx> why do these psycho's always msg my bot?
<xf> Because that is what psychos do.
<MenTaLguY> more to the point, why do a majority of them seem to be from Brazil?
<xf> Because that is where psychos live.
#10509
<Acheron> Don't hpb's brag about their l33t skillz and high ping when
they're winning?
<Xaotika> you think i have 1337 skills? HAHAHAHSAHASHAHAHAFA
<Xaotika> they rest of you just suck :)
#10499
* go_boy getting his haujobb on
<jej> i read that as 'handjob'
<go_boy> i assumed you would
<jej> you can always count on me.
<go_boy> for a handjob?
<jej> of course.
<go_boy> rockin.
#4198
<RevQuixo> i want a mario game where you do actual plumbing
<RevQuixo> oh, did i mention i was gay?
#1601
<skatoni> will some one please help
<`NeXiGeN`> what's yer problem ?
<skatoni> there is a guy hacking into my computer
<`NeXiGeN`> unplug yer modem
<skatoni> how?
<`NeXiGeN`> see all those wires behind your computer box ?
<`NeXiGeN`> ripem all out
*** skatoni has quit IRC (Read error to skatoni[ppp012.rosenet.net]: Connection reset by peer)
#6836
<angst> i want a relationship with more depth.
<angst> and no, i don't mean a deeper asshole.
<angst> i mean someone who can deep-throat.
#22297
* Sharkey changes topic to 'PORN HERE'
* Sharkey sets mode: -s
<Roger> ...this won't end good.
#12303
<baldurk> btw, happy independance day!!
<baldurk> although in england we call it thanksgiving day
#115095
<Obby> I'm going under the knife tomorrow.
<Kabloxy> Ahh, Jesus.
<Kabloxy> Hope it all goes well, dude.
<Obby> You know what I should do?
<Obby> On my correct leg, I should write; "Wrong leg, man," and on the other write; "Or is it? HAHAHAH THE pressure's on you, DOC! JUST YOU AND THE KNIFE!"
Comment: irc.waypasteleven.com, #n
#16839
<Tocool> Im so bored
<Tocool> I can predict my day
<Tocool> I woke up at 12:30, will sit around on computer till about 4, head to work, come back at 10:30, sit on computer till 2, go to bed
<Shaddix> pretty good
<Tocool> This isnt the normal course of action, just recent turn of events have left me with very lil to do
<Shaddix> oh
<Shaddix> impotentcy?
#45221
<Lost> wow this is so retarted
<Lost> my main computer
<Lost> needs a new video card
<Tenor> ? Lost
<Lost> flys got inside my computer and cloged everything up
<Lost> like
<Lost> tons of them
<Tenor> how the fuck did that happen
<Lost> and burnt out my video card
<Lost> I have no screen on my window
<Lost> and I have LED lights
<Lost> so I guess they go near the LED fan
<Lost> and get sucked in
#14533
<Vedic> Boiling cheese = DON'T EAT
#2034
<Brentai> ...you guys realize that this is the least I've ever laughed. I'm anti-laughing.
<FoxieMoxie> You're anti-laughing? Good, I hope your lungs implode then.
#7539
< ryll > "putting the 'fun' back into fundamentalism, and the 'laughter' back into sectarian slaughter"
#514
<Lathari> jack your ethernet into my ass and we'll have ourselves a REAL Lan party.
#14746
<|dxb|-XeS`006-> i have a nuclear bomb
<Mercury}W{> I bet its in your pants too.
<ONP-Trugoy> great now this channel is being monitored by the gov't
#1682
<stc> all us asians look alike
<stc> so getting in with older brother id's is easy heh
#32920
(Mootar) morons.
(Mootar) these people who live in my apartment complex are connected to my wireless
(Mootar) they must think they're super-cool hackers by breaking into my completely unsecure network
(Mootar) unfortunatly, the connection works both ways
(Mootar) long story short, they now have loads of horse porn on their computer
#19193
<Shinj> I'm more of a sexual, er... Monkey.
<Shinj> I'm not sure why, I just like monkeys.
#22304
<ChOwShAdY> like i fucked a 14 year old when i was 17
<ChOwShAdY> she was immature as a motherufcker
<@impuritor> dude, that is quite possibly the dumbest thing i've ever heard anyone say in my entire life
<@impuritor> that's like saying
<@impuritor> "My car runs like shit when i'm out of gas"
#17002
<ryano> i ain't drank dick for shit in months
<reston> try a lemondrop bodyshot
<reston> get some fly bitch and rub sugar on her tummy... lick it, take a shot of vodka
<reston> and then eat a lemon
<jonathans> is that some kind of homosexual alternative to tequila shots
<reston> yea jon
<reston> but its good
<jonathans> sugar instead of salt
<jonathans> lemon instead of lime
<jonathans> a chick instead of your hand
<jonathans> its beginning to make sense to me.
#195581
<titaniumone> A customer came into Best Buy and very clearly asked me where the "Black CD's" were. I assumed he was just your average ignorant racist so I brought him to the rap section, at which point he freaked out and had me get a manager so he could get me fired for being racist.
#16262
[ +Mattster ] in an emergency, the hard drive will launch itself through my window and safely onto the back lawn
[ +Mattster ] so in the future, someone else can benefit from my mp3's and porn