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#8741
<Doomaholic> my pad fell off, and i can play in an octave thats not supposted to exist
#42421
<PunchBag> haha, earlier i saw this girl wearing this T-shirt that had the words "I wish these were brains" written on her boobs
#301188
<+Kirjava> it's not incest
<+Kirjava> our parents are divorced
#33542
<issuez> k thats enough, im done be sappy
<issuez> ill listen to rammstein to counter everything
#11986
<eg0e> I saw the movie Hackers on tv last night and it was pretty impressive. If I had any idea the file manager on a macintosh was a 3D city I would have bought one long ago! Is there a similar file manager for XP that can do that?
#43117
<greap> my laptop is starting to feel like home
<Shelly> Your laptop can cripple your fertility
<greap> it'd have to be pretty heavy to achieve that wouldn't it?
<Shelly> Nope
<greap> explain
<Shelly> The heat generated by the laptop (Around 107 °F) Is enough to kill sperm
<greap> ah well, I guess I can console myself with the fact that my laptop is way cooler than any kids I'd ever have
#32099
<^gangster> jalljo: and btw, whats marijuana?
<jalljo> its a hacker term.
#2495
<CompGod> If crime doesn't pay, is my job illegal?
#300277
<Horrorfusion> i have just seen one of the worst things
<Horrorfusion> i go to tell my roommate something and i hear him making kind of a weird noise and his door is open so i knock and enter
<Horrorfusion> the motherfucker is laying on his bed holding his legs above his head, butt naked, and his balls are facing right into his bedside fan and he looks like he is in massive pain
<Horrorfusion> i yell "WHAT THE FUCK DUDE" and he freaks out
<Horrorfusion> about 5 minutes ago he comes into my room still in pain and explains that he got that icey hot stuff on his balls when he rubbing it into his calf
<Horrorfusion> and the cold air helped the pain
<Horrorfusion> good times in the hybridfusion household
Comment: #cobol
#70545
<Clipsy> There's a review on slashdot of a book called "Creating Web Pages with Ajax," and I was thinking
<Clipsy> I'd like to make a book called "Creating Web2.0 Content for Dummies"
<Clipsy> and then when someone opens the book
<Clipsy> a boxing glove on a spring comes out and punches them in the face
#1940
<Digested> hi krayons
<krayons> bleh
<al-x> heh
<al-x> spot the kid that has no serotonin left
#13065
<Rice_Boy> look at the sys requirements for interdev: www.free-trial-sex.com
<Rice_Boy> er... http://msdn.microsoft.com/vinterdev/prodinfo/sysreq.asp
<iheartsql> HAHAHAHAHA
<iheartsql> HAHAHAHAHA
<iheartsql> PRON HEAD
<Rice_Boy> my bad
<Rice_Boy> damn
#6229
<aXo> What an amazing weekend I had! I ate thirteen TV dinners, jacked off sixteen times and consumed one alcoholic beverage all without moving from this chair. I'm about to watch Godfather Part 3, then eat a bag of Doritos and pass out in a pool of my own saliva.
#115317
<Zemyla> Did I tell you about what my friend Joe did in auto shop?
<Zemyla> He was working with an arc welder, and the welder tip got stuck to the metal.
<Zemyla> He knew this was a bad thing, so he grabs a hammer and hits the metal to get the tip off.
<Zemyla> Then when he pulls back, lightning arcs from the metal to the hammer.
<Zemyla> The teacher notices this, and yells, "WHAT ARE YOU DOING?"
<Zemyla> And Joe bellows, "I AM THOR!", brandishes the hammer, and shocks the fuck out of the guy next to him.
Comment: #cmc on Nightstar
#11353
<guyen> holy shit i'm not going to be home this weekend, i have an online exam i have to take, but i'll be in LA
<guyen> there's a wedding going on so i won't be able to exactly just do it at my relative's house
<guyen> i'm looking for cybercafes and crap, the only thing i can find is some place called Yogi's Cyber Hut
<guyen> holy fuck i can't believe i'm depending on Yogi for my midterm grade
<xan> at least he's smarter than the average bear
#1134
<timmo> remember how i told you guys about that chick
<timmo> i was talking to in the record store
<McMoo> the imaginary one?
#24011
< CausaSui> So I was showing a coworker bsd, and explaining flags, and speficically the schg flag
< CausaSui> And to give him an example that even root can't delete schg flagged stuff, I tried rm /kernel
< CausaSui> But it turns out that, for some reason, on fresh installs of 4.8, none of the kernels are flagged schg
#194565
<protospork> I just clicked on a random image link in a conversation about cocks
<protospork> man that was smart
#6444
<zhixel> I'd really like to meet a sane woman who doesn't have to
constantly rely on me for emotional support
<far_call> and I'd really like to be able to drive my car to jupiter
#49442
<LOAF> So, I'm out back in the alley
<LOAF> I figure I'm alone, right
<LOAF> And it's completely dark
<LOAF> And I see a tiny round silhouette on the ground
<LOAF> Now, we've all been there: is it a coin or is it a splotch?
<LOAF> Do you bend over or don't you? What do you do? You have literally nanoseconds to figure it out.
<LOAF> But it was dark, damned dark, so the call was all the much harder.
<LOAF> And my brain gave the final instructions: coin, go for it, assume it is a coin.
<LOAF> And so I did.
<LOAF> And it was.
<LOAF> Which made me ever so pleased with myself
<LOAF> Which made me decide to do a little hop-and-spin and hold the coin up in the air
<LOAF> Which I did
<LOAF> And as I spun around and put the coin up in the air, there was a homeless guy digging through the dumpster, now staring at me.
<LOAF> And he clapped.
<LOAF> I offered him the coin, but he said I'd earned it.
#17881
<Heinz89> seen alric
<Plaidhawk> alric!irc@smilex.ormoru.net was last seen by me in #stars! 11m 22s ago saying: !seen heinz89
#25330
<Kethry> Leida, you're more than a trend now
<Leida> what am i now? what can there possibly be above a trend?
<Sensai-Sakiya> god? immortal? person worshiped by all?
<Leida> you are all worshipping me?
<Ibaimendi> I never realized the line between abuse and worship was so thin.
#16896
<Linguica> yeah if i was a girl i bet i would give good head
#295055
< aLExVP> my pal just had the most freaky experience of the week
< aLExVP> we're running a small VPN network around here, normally it is a relatively quiet project
< aLExVP> about an hour or so ago he got a call from someone else on the vpn
< aLExVP> he was asking around because he and other people were being port-scanned over the net, and he was wondering if anyone else knew something about it
< aLExVP> because we normally don't port scan each other over the vpn
< aLExVP> now he was just having a little private lan party with some friends
< aLExVP> (yes he invited me too but i have a test next week and a shitload of work ahead)
< aLExVP> anyway
< aLExVP> looking around a bit they traced it to his vpn connection
< aLExVP> and after looking around a bit more they found out the scans were coming from one of the windows systems at the party
< aLExVP> the system was a mess. no anti-virus on a budget gamer pc
< aLExVP> he has a router providing VPN access to his home net
< aLExVP> they traced the source of the attack on the windows box to an IRC bot net, and from there back again to his own connection
< aLExVP> further on to his wireless router
< aLExVP> and, interrestingly, to the car in front of his house
#8926
<zita> hi im a 17 yers old girl from norway,i have birtday too day
<meyou> 17 year old girl from norway? doesn't that mean you're a 43 year old man from the U.S. ?