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#17093
<phr0id> anyone have e-txr2.001?, im on 56k
<juntog> that's like asking "anyone want to have sex? I have aids!"
#310980
<asterick> Does anyone ever feel like jQuery is kinda like bill cosby?
<asterick> Like, everyone used to REALLY love him, but then someone said "I was totally raped by jQuery" then all of a sudden everyones like "DUDE ME TOO"
#34785
<fatmikey> well I think i'll make that my new hobby after going to the gym when I should be studying
<fatmikey> one can only make a 45 minute workout last so long
<Kurt> have you made it last 45 minutes yet?
#1778
<wild> whats the difference between jesus and a picture of jesus?
<wild> it only takes one nail to hang a picture of jesus
#12173
<johnsmith> Ill sit at bars and write perl on my napkin until girls are so thick around me I cant move my body
#40909
<Jeff> now... he probably woulda been grounded forever if it were gay porn...
<pilot1> no, they're catholic
#21414
<Shez> i shall create my own planet named "the planet of dropdead losers named Shez"
<|iCARUS|> Shez: cool!! can i have the planet next to that?
<Scathing> Icarus: the "I'm with Stupid ->" planet?
#35113
_Sarah_: so what do you do all night?
groogle: ....
groogle: fuck with peoples minds on irc ;)
_Sarah_: ahhhh
_Sarah_: so im just a victim?
#4858
<Puff-working> I play the banjo..never learned fiddle..but I might someday.
<Puff-working> and I can make a harmonica sing.
<Unfor|Work> I play the CD player
#1731
<outcaste> When I was single, I used super sensitive condoms.
<outcaste> They were so sensitive that they'd stick around and talk to the chiq
for an hour after I'd gone
#1409
<aCidbOy> can anyone help me out? I've been locked up for 6 months (by the INS - They were trying to deport me... long story)... I just got back out, and I'm trying to get back into the scene... I just need a good lead on sites... all my old ones are dead... thanx
#204833
< tripletech> do old people really say pew pew pew? i thought that was a 00s thing
<@Fib> tripletech of course, winston churchill himself said in his famous speech "we shall fight in the fields and in the streets, we shall fight in the hills; we shall never surrender, pew pew pew!"
< fansipans> "do not want" was originally a prohibition protest song
< pmv> i thought it was the civil rights movement
< fansipans> pmv no that was can has
< pmv> haha
< fansipans> remember martin luther king's famous speech "i can has a dream" ?
< pmv> i can has cheezeburger was black slang for equal rights
< fansipans> well back in those days cheeseburgers were only served in the "whites only" section of diners
< fansipans> so it really was a rallying cry for many
< pmv> nice
Comment: #cobol
#7711
<sc1> the video was compressed at 5fps
<sc1> jesus this sucks
<asmodius> Jesus can't help with sucky frame rates. Trust me on that one.
<asmodius> He's pretty useless when it comes to video compression rates.
#14581
<@crystalis> I wish I had a vagina
<@crystalis> I'd keep stuff in it
<@crystalis> like car keys and stuff
#55361
<fruitkat> i think i laughed because it was coupled with the word butter. butter pickle. hehe.
* pickle slowly walks away whilst smiling and nodding...
<fruitkat> :)
<fruitkat> im not CRAZY
<fruitkat> now im imagining a pickle smiling and nodding
<fruitkat> STOP IT!
Comment: #qx
#30514
<Calisa> This guy's quote says "If it has tits or wheels you won't understand it."
<Calisa> I think we should build a sex doll that is attached to wheels.
<Calisa> Instead of feet and hands, it has wheels.
<BChikapa> That'd be so awesome.
<BChikapa> But, it'd be hard to do doggy style.
#32846
<Akaramu> Don't question your god!
<Ricky> Blow me.
<Akaramu> ...
<Ricky> Wait, no, that is gay, don't do that.
#437
<lamont-> spanish kids can speak better english than most kids on aol
<lamont-> when they're fucking three years old!
#19812
<whitelightning> suck my nipples
<teh-kitteh> WL: huh?
<BlackIce> wl: ask geo
<teh-kitteh> he's at work though iceh :)
* whitelightning runs off for Geo
<whitelightning> wow!
<whitelightning> he's got a mouth like a hoover
<BlackIce> wl
<BlackIce> that's not geo
<BlackIce> that's a hoover
#62907
k2xl: being single vs having a steady girlfriend can be related to working
k2xl: having a steady girlfriend is like working steadly for a 'company'
k2xl: yes, it ensures you moeny and gives you many 'benefits', you can rest easy at night knowing that you have a 'job' waiting for you the next mornin. when new 'offers' come up your company has to increase your 'benefits' or you might lose interest with the company.
k2xl: however, on the bad side, it's hard to leave your company that you've worked with for so long, and you never know if you quit your 'company' that you could find a better one. Plus, some companies work you long hours without pay and barely give any days off.
k2xl: on the contrary, if you stay single, it's like freelancing.
k2xl: you can pick and choose 'better looking' work
k2xl: but some months you have tons of 'work' and some months you 'can't get any'
k2xl: because, as they say, and yes with pun intended, 'jobs' don't always fall into your lap ;)
#307740
<n0idx80> I have a very nice laptop with 4GB (takes 8) that the cpu fan makes a horrible noise, and I just can't bear to open it up
<Chainsaw> You feel that dust bunnies are animals too and deserve to live?
#25060
<timmo> you know this will be one of those things
<timmo> where when i die st. peter or whoever
<timmo> is looking over my sins and what not
<timmo> "so you told chris to, and i quote 'knock the bottom out of it and make sure she cant walk right tomorrow'?"
<timmo> "nah man it wasnt like that"
<arse-poet> and then he will show you the irc long
Comment: #geekissues
#13477
<MrMonkey> Erdrick: I speak your language a lot better than I speak yours, ok?
#107067
<Razmann> isn't that a sign of the apocalypse or something?
* FurryHelix looks out of the window... "Nope. I don't see the five horsemen"
<Razmann> aren't there only 4?
<FurryHelix> no there were five, but one left before they got famous.
<Razmann> so since the fifth left, that would mean there's only 4
<FurryHelix> reunion tour.
#1749
<timmo> what music should i download tonight
<timmo> oh shit
<timmo> i think im missing the carebears;[
<c-rOCK> CAREBEARS IS STILL ON?
<c-rOCK> NO WAY WHAT CHAN
<timmo> toon disney
<c-rOCK> dude I loved that show