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#311375
<DrMcCoy> $ mv clone2728 droid2727
<-- clone2728 has quit (Ping timeout: 255 seconds)
<DrMcCoy> Well, that's not quite what I wanted :P
--> droid2727 has joined #xoreos
<Farmboy0> DrMcCoy: you certainly have a way with people ^^
#8424
<[Phoenix]> My keyboard is gay?
<Howdy> yes, but thats no reason to feel uncomfortable.. a gay keyboard can touch your digits and it not be sexual
#11520
<jre> If you were a Nazi and had 2 hostages but only 1 bullet, who would you shoot? Some normal crew-cut soldier or G.I. Joe?
<Gudrow> I'd shoot myself because Nazis are assholes.
#29913
< Diluted> Could someone please explain to me what a unix admin is without being sarcastic?
#5579
<|argh|> I was caring for a woman from Kentucky and asked, "So how's your breakfast this morning?" "It's very good, except for the Kentucky Jelly. I can't seem to get used to the taste," the patient replied. I then asked to see the jelly and the woman produced a foil packet labeled KY Jelly.
#6138
--> osx_newb has joined #cprogramming
<osx_newb> helo?
<Vulpyne> 250 Vulpyne
#7532
<|rein|> Robitussin is like Jello man, there's always room for more
#3723
<FreshBrew> if i ever get arrested for something serious, 20/20 and Dateline are going to have a field day with my irc logs.
#8336
<Sanji> I eat people.
<Sanji> I'm a humanitarian
#42992
[@WhipSmart]: for every story you hear about a dog saving someone's life, there are probably a million where the dog just sat there and watched them die
Comment: Quakenet #funchat
#34703
<darkchron> someone know of a good database i can get for free ?
Comment: #MySQL
#32186
* %Mastas ::MP3:: Kill the Jews - Why Hilter was right! - The NeoNaziNationals :: To get say '!get'
<SGR> erm.. wtf?
<Mastas> what?
<Lokey> !get
* Mastas sets mode: +b *!*@*bb2.33f0f94f.rochester.rr.com
* Lokey was kicked by Mastas (Get out you racist fuck.)
<SGR> lol
<Mastas> pwned :D
#3613
<SinbadTheSailor> hi hedge...are you on turps?
<Hedge> quite sober actually
<sTar69> sober like, just jammed my penis in the door kinda sober?
<Hedge> sober like i just got caught shoplifting a dildo kinda sober
<sTar69> oh THAT kind of sober ;)
<sTar69> i mean err what are you talking about?
#57940
+ chedder - you know what would be the best defacement
+ chedder - if you print a screenshot of the website, wipe your ass with it, scan it and replace there website with that one image
+ chedder - of the site
+ chedder - with shit smeared all over it
% dDevil - Lmao
% dDevil - I must say, that is a good idea.
+ chedder - except it would get your scanner all pooey
#307356
<@Shifteny> Ok, I just did something really stupid and I was glad nobody was over in this office today to see it
<@Shifteny> I have this really nice, very warm fleece pullover I keep in this office because it gets cold over here sometimes
<@Shifteny> it has a drawstring in the waist
<@Shifteny> well, I've been wearing it since lunch because I was cold
<@Shifteny> I started getting hot, so I decided to take it off
<@Shifteny> I didn't notice that I was sitting on the drawstring
<@Shifteny> so as I was trying to pull the garment over my head, the drawstring kept tightening around my waist
<@Shifteny> so I was stuck there for a minute trying to figure out why I couldn't get it off
<@Shifteny> flailing around, trying to pull my arms out so I could get un-stuck
<@Shifteny> it was like the fleece pullover equivalent of a Chinese finger trap
#1978
~ tiko wishes he was part of this seceret club known as "jew"
(tiko) but when the entry fee is part of your cock, I think I'll pass
#38426
<@ara> Occupation: psychologist
<@ara> Smoker: No
<@ara> Drinker: No
<@ara> sweet
<@ara> she can deal with me fine
<@ara> i dont drink i dont smoke
<@ara> and im insane
Comment: #SBK, irc.enterthegame.com
#6549
* Lemieux doesnt do the menage-a-trois thing
<Lemieux> at least... not if there's 2 women involved
<skidd> so you're a multiple input woman?
* Lemieux is not a porn star
<JayByrd> you don't have to be a porn star
<JayByrd> dirties across the land are getting it at both ends, as we speak
#34475
<Josho> haha fox fucked up
<Josho> caption: BRUTAL DAY
<Josho> bitch is talkign about people dead in iraq
<Josho> and there's this video of a guy skiing
#37190
* Wolfy does his bit to erradicate capitalism by using lower case :P
* Wolfy is now known as wolfy
#311302
<dn5> I have int start = 1476620495; and int end = 1476620495 (unix timestamp), but if I have int res; and then res = end - start, res returns 0 when printf with %d
<dn5> why?
<izalove> because it's the same number?
<fstd> duh
<dn5> okay thats not supposed to happen haha
<fstd> ,reset
<candide> Days since our last accident: 0
Comment: ##c at freenode
#7958
<sine> "You couldn't get a stroke of genius if you were giving a handjob to Einstein."
#100874
<rasp> i was catering a “tenant appreciation” event in palo alto yesterday
<rasp> we had these slushie machines, but one broke and spilled everywhere
<rasp> so i went to the main office to ask if they had a hose, but the guy tells me,
<rasp> “no, but i see the google guys across the street using a hose sometimes, you can try asking them”
<rasp> turns out this place was right next to one of google’s offices
<rasp> i walked over to the cafeteria area and asked one of the cooks, be he told me they didn't know where it was
<rasp> as i was walking away, i had a little moment to myself...
<rasp> "wow, i just queryed google irl"
<rasp> "lol"
Comment: error 404: hose not found
#7418
<[KoG]^Deeshay> I'll beat you when I get a modem that isnt controlled by a rat in a wheel
#10165
BeHeMoTh101 : dude, this one time in school i was looking at this advertisement to a christian club
BeHeMoTh101 : and on the poster it said "who carries your load? jesus does."
BeHeMoTh101 : and i was like, wtf it's the scrotum