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#11428
<antix> i have a poem
<Lulu> share
<antix> its call "an irc life"
<antix> my bandwidth
<antix> i lag... i lag
<antix> i die....
<antix> the end
<fluxz0r> that was so touching
#16971
<ncc386> It seems to be an oral fixation that drives me to smoke and when I quit 3 weeks ago I started eating more. If that's the case there is a healther, cleaner, more fun oral practice that could satisfy me.
#297802
<John> i would really appreciate it if you would stop IMing my girlfriend.
<DevXen> i would really appreciate it if you would stop cock blocking me.
#48288
<Sargasm> It must be a bitch to write your name in the snow in Arabic
#141262
<CoolCookieCooks> when i was a child i thought being disabled was another gender because they had seperate toilets.
#57019
<Malphas> How many femanists does it take to change a light bulb?
<@Cassie> Oh no
<Malphas> Two. One to change the bulb and the other to suck my dick.
*** You have been kicked from #Womens_Issues
#44572
<@PJD> a blackdude tried 2 molest u last night?
<@spo0n> yeah
<@spo0n> he called it "dancing" i called it "nigga get your hand out of my pants"
<@PJD> oh so ur racist
#25599
[8:39pm]«+ w2o » Are you religious?
[8:40pm]«@ Dwarf» no Christian
#8248
<EK> What if the war in Afghanistan was fought with midgets!
<Jei> With midgets as infantry, or as ammunition?
#30298
<Ultimos> what's a fuckin troll?
<Ultimos> lol
<binkzz> url what is an internet troll
<migas> - "what is an internet troll": http://www.wikipedia.org/wiki/Internet_troll
<Ultimos> migas has saveth me.
<binkzz> migas always takes the credit ;[
#74348
fibrosis> It has even been estimated that one in 10 Europeans are conceived in an Ikea bed.
dalamar> That's an awful lot of Ikea beds.
fibrosis> or a handful of very dirty beds
#31557
<CanOfSpam> I spent my lunchbreak at work stealing my neighbor's wife, kicking his ass, and getting her pregnant.
<CanOfSpam> The Sims is the way to be!
<CanOfSpam> Im gonna nap for 2 hours and think about whether to show up at work.
<CanOfSpam> bbl
<emil^> cos - have fun!
<Glock21> You'll be sitting at your computer after days of insomnia... you're work habits will go to hell, your personal relationships will suffer, you'll go broke... and as you're sitting there in the middle of the night with a full bladder you suddenly realize that your sim has with a great deal of your own personal effort...
<Glock21> ...has a great job, a great house full of great stuff, a great girlfriend, plenty of sleep, a better computer than you, and is happier, healthier, and made it to the bathroom just fine because you suffer for him.
Comment: EFNet #politics
#8704
<prower> check out what i put on e-bay
<tom_> oh god
<tom_> are you trying to sell your sister again
<tom_> i keep telling you its illegal
#28810
* Kirby is now known as Sandman`
<Hell_Kitty> pink balls aren't sexy
<Sandman`> Kirby turns me on.
<Vel|EVN> :/
<Sandman`> Look at how he swallows.
#296571
*Global* A novice srvx class will be starting in about 10 minutes. Please /join #class if you would like to attend and learn more about what features are available to you and how to use them.
<Fax> A cervix class?
<Fax> I wasn't aware you could get a gynecology degree over the internet
#61310
< niteshad> Every so often, a van from Corporate will pull up and drop off a load of gear that's surplus, overstock and returns.
< niteshad> Can't be sold as new so they give it to the employees.
< paul> hah
< niteshad> The only caveat is that they don't want to see us selling it on ebay, etc.
< niteshad> However, giving it to friends is perfectly acceptable in Corporate's eyes.
< paul> can you give it away in exchange for sexual favors?
< niteshad> They didn't say anything explicitly forbidding that so, I assume the answer is yes.
< paul> awesome
< paul> well...
< niteshad> That said, paul, in your case, the answer is no.
#25163
<Motaro > Live Journal would've been so much better if it were called Jive Journal.
<cylinder > shoudl've been called STICK YOUR FUCKING LIFE IN HERE AND THEN WHINE WHEN PEOPLE MAKE CRUDE COMMENTS Journal
#50826
[lenin-communist] you americans hate communism
[@whipsmart] I love Communism... it's because of Communism that Russian girls will give you a blowjob for a pair of Levis
Comment: Quakenet #FunChat
#8259
<akumapan> yous ound like poopoo
<andy> You type like poop.
<andy> and your mother was suspicious that it took her nine whole months to take a crap, so she named it just in case.
#36610
<Time> =====
<Time> | O |
<Time> |___|<+________
<Time> ___/ \___
<Time> / \ / \
<Time> | L | STEAMLOLLER | L |
<Time> | LOL | | LOL |
<Time> | L |\___________/| L |
<Time> =======\___/lol lol lol lol\___/LOL LOL LOL LOL
#32855
<kip> it seems like every region of the us has some terrible and ridiculous problem
<RedDye4o> yes
<kip> like fire ants or earthquakes or thawing dog poo in the spring
<RedDye4o> America: a union of terrible and ridiculous problems
#11735
<+brx|> u know whats great about spreadsheets..?
<+brx|> ....NOTHING THEY ARE FUCKING COCKBAGS
#33277
<goatasaur> if you ate nothing but corn for like two days, and then took a shit, and took a picture of it, you could be an internet celebrity
<goatasaur> such is the power of the internet
Comment: #fark
#461
<Theseus> get the free like 10 CDs they give you
<Theseus> then write a letter to them signed under your parents name saying you burned all those satan music CDs, and to never send mail to that address again
#310941
Chillum: the most evil thing I have ever made is a tiny USB stick that when inserted in a computer pretends to be a keyboard and turns on/off CAPS LOCK every minute or so randomly
Chillum: it drives people insane
dmacks_away: Luckily I have a case-insensitive filesystem and a shell that is so crappy it doesn't even realize when a command is miscapitalized.
legoktm: you use PHP as your shell?