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#901
<McMoo> my penis is pretty gay
<McMoo> it can regularly be found in male anuses
#15910
<funkymonkey> My band is called Imation CDR 74m 650 MB....have you seen our CD's?
#25113
<Mandingo> This is why I go to CNN.com.
<Mandingo> http://www.cnn.com/2002/US/08/08/porn.patriot/index.html
<American> im not clicking on anything that says porn patriot
<AirsickMoth> some american.
#310495
<apo_> My parents wanted to see how well google now (that android voice recognition thing) worked, so I told it to show me pictures of Nussschnecken (some nutty pastry), and it interpreted that is "Muschi lecken" (pussy licking) ~_~
#33034
(@[iNw]Tessai) <- virgin :(
(@[iNw]ForK) sif
(@[iNw]ForK) how old are you?
(@[iNw]Tessai) 19
(@[iNw]ForK) wow, I didnt think they made 19 year old virgins anymore
#34181
<Paradidle> I wonder what a dog thinks right before it humps someones leg... "I dont know what it is, but I'm gonna fuck it."
#39315
* ryukitsu has joined #vee
<Riiko> Wild RYUKITSU appeared!
* ryukitsu prepares a tackle attack :o
* ryukitsu is gathering energy.
<Riiko> you don't have to gather energy for tackle
<ryukitsu> But I'm lazy >(
* ryukitsu prepares to walk across the room.
* ryukitsu is gathering energy.
#33101
<Trigun_> I hate Anger mangement class
<Recon> heh
<Recon> i can tell its really working :|
#11223
<Jubei301> I want a director's cut version of the matrix where the red and blue pills are suppositories...
#310609
* Jigsy frantically runs into the channel with an urgent message.
<Jigsy> The anorgasmic are comin- wait, wait, sorry, false alarm. They're not.
#17172
* C|3avag3 has quit IRC (Quit: Wh0 Am |? U sure u wanna know? If somebody told u i was just your average ordinary guy, not a care in the world, somebody lied! This is my gift! It is my curse! Who am |? |'m Spider-Man!!!)
<Seaker> And lamest quit message of the day goes to C|3avag3
* Att|tude^ has quit IRC (Quit: I can't go on, I know not what to do, My heart is worn, I feel as If I'm through, Please believe in me. 'Cause what I need is for you.... To believe in me.)
<Seaker> Woah, tough competition today ... I think today we'll have to call it a draw.
* Love-snack has quit IRC (Quit: Quit playing games with my heart cause baby you're breaking my heart , I LOVE YOU FOREVER XXX)
<Seaker> *DING DING* WE HAVE A WINNER!!
#298993
<rmaly_05> man i need ur help
<segin11> with what?
<rmaly_05> i m trying to put condom on my penis
<segin11> WTF
<rmaly_05> but the foreskin of my penis is not coming back
#11590
<ShockSMX> I have more important things to do right now than sitting in front of the computer... For example sitting behind the computer, where its safe and nobody will hurt me.
#1942
<Kayma> shouldn't Cheney have died by now?
<Richard_D_James> Yes
<Kayma> My returning from the future must have changed more than I thought....
#15684
<kanzen> heh.. this guy's ont he phone calling his computer pookie.. "Oh come
on pookie, you can do it pookie.. there you go pookie, thats it... "
#14608
<[ryan]> jack i have more mariokart hours than your airline pilot has flight hours on flights
<class> hours or not
<class> ill let my shells do the talking
<class> and your ass do the eating
<[ryan]> in a pure race i'd own you
<[ryan]> weapons only make things more complicated
<class> thats like saying 'when you take the hard element out of the game I ROCK
#8866
<Rance> so... i'm driving to cedar rapids today
<Rance> and i'm feeling a little frisky...
<Rance> so i start cranking one off in the car
<Rance> and it's really kind of funny when you... achieve your objective, and you wind up laying on the horn... and it's blaring for like 1/4 mile
<Rance> so now the next time i hear someone going down the road with their horn going for no reason... i'll know
#8721
<pritch> yeah well i do an english writing degree
<Linguica> do have
#36396
<@m4rine> everyone be quiet for like
<@m4rine> 10 minutes
<@m4rine> so i get bored of irc
<@m4rine> and go to bed
#61433
<mvz> my morning erection is my power on self test
Comment: #olsentwins
#304873
<Jake|E5400> There's spaghetti in the southbridge
<Jake|E5400> and steak on my CD
<Jake|E5400> I kid you not
<Jake|E5400> I just dropped a steak on my XP install disk
<~tidux> lol
* Jake|E5400 wipes it off
<ll_TankPad> Windows XP Medium Rare Edition
Comment: #wtfpwnt on irc.rubbermallet.org
#1159
<DeadPan> i would've challenged knights to fight in a 4 foot body of water
<DeadPan> then just tried to push em over
<DeadPan> and laugh as they drown
<th15> theyd call you a wuss :)
<DeadPan> so i'd be alive and they wouldnt :)
#53189
<Hajuu> Man I love it at my work when old ladies call me a gentleman... Makes me wanna fuck.
#50484
<@ChrisH> Donald Rumsfeld is giving the president his daily briefing. He concludes
<@ChrisH> by saying: "Yesterday, 3 Brazilian soldiers were killed in an accident"
<@ChrisH> "OH DEAR GOD NO!!!" George W. Bush exclaims. "That's terrible!!" His
<@ChrisH> staff sits stunned at this display of emotion, nervously watching as the
<@ChrisH> president sits, head in hands. Finally, the President, devastated, looks
<@ChrisH> up and asks.......... "How many is a Brazillion??!"
#88844
<Slowking_Man> Ugh, I'm dealing with a site that apparently uses javascript to load flash to load WMV files
<Slowking_Man> It's like something out of Richard Stallman's nightmares
Comment: #defocus@irc.freenode.net