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#14076
<Jester-> *rapes Eevee a lot*
<Red_Sky> It's not rape if he enjoys it.
<Jester-> .... he?
#6921
<Satrina> and no, that's my friend Marissa The Nympho Elf :P
<Satrina> we put the Ho in Nympho
#50267
<Klassh> strange, my left hand is warm, but my right hand is cold..
<killjoy> take left hand out of pants.
<killjoy> put right hand in pants.
#12356
<NASTYFEET> ANY TUFF GUYS HERE THAT WILL FIGHT MY DAD ? MSG ME
#301342
<DrSunglass> So, my family just upgraded to HDTV satellite TV.
<DrSunglass> The thing I notice most is that the fine print in commercials is now clearly legible.
#28340
<meeps> i saved a girls life tonight
<DJ-Quack> well meeps?
<meeps> this terrorist came around the corner and tried to kill her so i shot his head off
<DJ-Quack> omfg meeps
<hpr> lol :P
<meeps> hahaha
<DJ-Quack> you asshole
<DJ-Quack> ;[
<LawnMM> did he respawn?
<meeps> Yeah, next round
#56417
<Beeble_> skip you're cute
<skippy_> i'm 5ft tall
<skippy_> i have to be cute
<skippy_> or live under a bridge
<skippy_> and eat goats
<skippy_> i went with cute
<Beeble_> good choice
<skippy_> i'm beginning to rethink that
<skippy_> chicks don't like cute guys
<skippy_> they like bad guys
<skippy_> "have you seen any goats around?"
<skippy_> that would be a great pickup line
#53899
<NeCRoPedOPhilE_SuicideCULT> how to change my nickername?
#15733
<FlashMan> nethack is installed
<Jon2> An IRC chick stands in your path. She wears a +5 ring of decreased mental stability.
* sQurl kicks jon2
<sQurl> I AM STABLE GOD DAMN YOU
<sQurl> DON'T MAKE ME KILL YOU
<Jon2> The IRC chick attacks. She misses.
#10894
<Starscream> uh
<Starscream> i just accidentally told my credit card company i was smoking crack
<Starscream> shit.
#41289
<Nark> someone mentions nachos and the whole channel jumps from idling bastards to fools talking about nachos
#17403
<hepkitten> also i appear to have lost my bf
<hepkitten> :<
<kinzillah> "lost"? does he respond to ping?
#15603
*** treker has joined #ircop
<treker> what is this channel for?
<_zenon> sex channel treker
<treker> AH, I see...
<treker> well then by all means, go ahead, have fun...i'll just go run some errands.
#56804
<Karlprof> NEW RECORD!
<Karlprof> I just drove someone out a channel on Freenode in *two* lines!
<Karlprof> -->| fred_basset has joined ##anything
<Karlprof> <Karlprof> I read your nick as 'breast_feed', fred.
<Karlprof> <Karlprof> I just thought you should know that.
<Karlprof> <fred_basset> thanks
<Karlprof> <--| fred_basset has left ##anything
#526
<matt`> <goh`> guilty you spelt speed wrong
<goh`> spelled*
<McMoo> <goh`> YOUR USUALLY SO CAREFUL
<goh`> you're*
<goh`> you guys are assholes
#216681
Colin: So I saw this really hot chick in a bar and I'm thinking man I gotta talk to her. Then i saw she had a black eye and thought, damn, shes taken.
Mike: Looks like someone beat ya to it.
#11095
<herk> wait'll i put out my hip hop album
<chrissyb0> i can see it now
<chrissyb0> "Im herschel i get all the bitches i want, i can make a
webpage with any font
#49782
<cobalt27x> florida is a giant phallic hurricane magnet
#50895
<funkin_dudette> gah, my internets being gay
<mellomeh> wow really? my internet is gay too!
<mellomeh> our internets should totally get married
<funkin_dudette> um no thanks
<mellomeh> so you're saying our internets should break up?
* mellomeh has quit IRC (*.net *.split)
* funkin_dudette has quit IRC (*.net *.split)
#8149
<Vertinox> >< jesus you eleetists
<Vertinox> i curse joe and anarch to die of prostate cancer at the age of 64
<Vertinox> you just remember that
<Soulflame> hehe
<Soulflame> DIE
<Exile> why not make it next year? curse them to die at age 14
*** Exile was kicked by Joe_ (I'm 17, jAckass.)
#8101
<Paeyl> why did i just have a sudden image of a penis with tentacles at the tip
<alayna> cthulhuitis
<Paeyl> is there an antibiotic for that?
<Paeyl> "doc, i have a problem." "what?" "it's my.. penis.. it .. " "yes?" "it can.. write its own name."
<geo> That's not a problem, son...that's a potential career.
#29241
<jjfate> does forking come after spooning?
<Swoozy> No, forking comes before spooning
<Swoozy> You don't have energy to do anything but spoon after fork
<Odat> if you want to fork more than once you quickly learn how neccesary spoons are
<Odat> if you go too long forking without spooning, the woman is liable to work a knife on you
#300320
halcy0n: yanno what i fkn hate
halcy0n: .....the motion activated toilets
halcy0n: dude...you cant fuckin move!
bladezor: hahaaaa
halcy0n: you like just twist one way and its a fuckin shit water bidet.
halcy0n: doesnt help that the toilet flushing is powered by a fucking boeing 757 engine
#1212
<g> <FedAg455> hey wanna meet with me for some sex? im 13/f/canada, wanna meet in usa in front of brooklyn police department?
<g> <cooey> how do i know you are 14 D:
#29201
<kegObeer> Klez is a virus? I thought it was the lesbian that came bundled with KDE