Random | Latest | Best | Full Site
#8458
<Punk-In-Drublic> THE FOLLOWING PEOPLE SUCK COCK ...Mousey, Dave, Vas, Belindah..........YALL CAN GAT FUCKED COS IM DRUNK WOOOOOOOOO ......BOOBIES WOOOOOOOOOO'
<Mousey> why am i first
<Mousey> thats really insulting
<vas-deferens> because your the best at iut
<mk4> why am i second ?
<vas-deferens> shit im third
<vas-deferens> i better work on my technique
<vas-deferens> at least im beating a chick
<Mousey> hahahah
#2504
<iRalph> i'm not a cunt
<iRalph> although...
<iRalph> you are what you eat
#35897
Miraculous> does anyone know anything about routers?
Rukus+> the most important advice i can give you
Rukus+> do NOT rip it out of the wall when drunk and say you have defeated the matrix
#49755
(mRCUTEO) rpm matthew
(mRCUTEO) sorry rip matthew
[ShoeUnited] (mRCUTEO) rpm matthew <--- I could make an entirely inappropriate spinning in his grave joke right now, but I won't.
#298198
<+pichu> 0C = freezing, 100C = boiling
<Hideki-kun> kelvin = C + 273.15
<%^> 0 degrees Celsius = 32 degrees Fahrenheit
<div> i look at all the ppl talking about temperature
<div> and all i see is K F C
<div> <_<
<div> and then i got hungry
#56763
<Nero> ZXLink, I learned something today
<Nero> When someone asks you "you know what's retarded?"
<Nero> The correct response is "What?"
<Nero> Not "Kids with Down syndrome"
#20471
<Ccmods> for what I'm creating, I'll need a length of duct tape, an avacado, and a tube sock.
<Ccmods> believe it or not, u can make a bong outta that
<Sean> i thought it was some sort of wanking implement
#26326
<thumbtack> fucking fathers day
<thumbtack> THANKS DAD FOR CREATING ME, I LOVE WORKING ALL THE FUCKING TIME and LIFE IS SO PRECIOUS
Comment: #lost
#31969
<edisk> wtf
<edisk> webmd says not to use topical salicylic acid on unborn babies
<edisk> Now, how you're gonna wipe down a fetus with an oxy pad I don't know
Comment: irc.nerdtopia.org #lobby
#19344
<Tac0> the bumpy road to silky smooth balls begins now! afk!
#7764
<redial> read me the contents of your q3key file and i'll tell you if the upgrade will work
<faz> my q3key says P00R 4773MP7
#3158
<aNuBiS-> RaMTuFF: You should know better than to drive under the influence of a hard-on
#303214
<highjack> does anyone have a time machine I can borrow?
<Zetta> highjack: yeah, but I need it back ten minutes ago
#41105
<SilverHammy> I've only seen that in pornos
<SilverHammy> I mean, other people have seen that in pornos
#32918
<splice> i think its funny that it takes more syllables to say "hello" in japanese than to describe female fart porn
#35843
* Akujin watches porn
<Akasha> aku are you ALWAYS watchin porn?
<Akujin> When your neighbor is a 21 year old chick who masturbates with the blinds open, then yes
Comment: irc.starfusion.org
#306996
<scoff> I owe Toronto a visit at some point
<Mr_Shfty> outstanding warrants?
<scoff> Well, they're okay but I wouldn't say they're outstanding
#33571
<antivert> One of them was a total asshole, he was like "STOP LISTENING TO ME!!" because I was call coaching him
<antivert> this guy apparently told his customer "Sir, if you don't calm down, I'm going to have to put you in the penalty box." And the customer kept getting pissed off so he was like
<antivert> "Sir, if you don't calm down, I'm going to have to put you in the penalty box."
<antivert> the guy started yelling again so he took off his headset, put it in one of the metal drawers by the desks and started kicking the FUCK out of it screaming "YOU'RE IN THE PENALTY BOX!! YOU'RE IN THE PENALTY BOX MOTHERFUCKER!!!!"
Comment: antivert worked tech support
#41142
<Ne0rC> I like buying snacks from a vending machine because food is better when it falls. Sometimes at the grocery, I'll drop a candy bar so that it will achieve its maximum flavor potential.
<clonak> ....
<clonak> O_O
#13605
<SarahS> With my large internal capacity to hold water, and your creative igeniuty, we can rule the world!
#53518
<Raz> She's not technically your girlfriend anymore.
<The_Forgotten> No, it's an upgrade.
<Raz> $500 upgrade.
<The_Forgotten> Yeah. It's like getting new rims.
Comment: [talking about the recent engagement]
#305147
<MurderMachine> So.
<MurderMachine> My rectal went something like this:
<MurderMachine> "Tell me when it feels uncomfortable"
<MurderMachine> "Dr Donaldson I'm lying on a bed pointing my ass at a relative stranger. It's already less comfortable than I'd like."
#47135
< zeon> typing drunk is hard
< feenyx> it's just five letters
#31756
* DigDug has joined #ramen
<Morris> You get the ankles, and I'll get the wrists...
<DigDug> ack!
#2011
<Speef> man
<Speef> I have some killer gas
<matts> go to the terrorists... they'll need your help