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#2034
<Brentai> ...you guys realize that this is the least I've ever laughed. I'm anti-laughing.
<FoxieMoxie> You're anti-laughing? Good, I hope your lungs implode then.
#1064
* r0bt3k looks at his 100 megs of mp3s
<r0bt3k> hehehe
* r0bt3k then looks at his 5 gigs of porn
<r0bt3k> hahahah
#18495
<JessiA> that's weird though
<Kirke> Plus it doesn't even work that well
<JessiA> because Diabetics usually ONLY drink diet sodas
<Kirke> It makes you crave carbohydrates
<The_Vagrant> yeah
<The_Vagrant> my dad can only have diet
<The_Vagrant> but i don't think he cares about the whatever
<Kirke> Not to mention it tastes like ass
<The_Vagrant> i happen to enjoy the taste
<JessiA> hehehe true that
<Kirke> You would
<The_Vagrant> ..um i know i would
<The_Vagrant> i said it didn't I
<JessiA> Vag likes the taste of ass?
<The_Vagrant> no
<The_Vagrant> ass tastes totally different
#20586
<killjoy> i'm leaving smooshed bug guts on the top corner of my monitor as an example of what will happen if any other bug should attempt to cross into my domain.
#12131
<@D-rage> i'm burning cds like a madman. heh
<@dithi> how many backstreet boys cds do you really need?
#307473
<Sanzh> wouldn't penis math be cockulus
<TheDeleter> Prickonometry?
<Schazer> dongrivatives?
<Jacquerel> arithmadicks
#11978
<mertine> at least he didn't get KICKED OUT OF SCHOOL for STABBING A TEACHER WITH A POCKETKNIFE BOOZ
<melvin> booz stabbed a teacher???
<Gabooz> HE STARTED IT
#56577
<@Stupid_0> Never compromise your principles, except to get laid or if there's a chance of a pay rise.
#38228
<@lysol> this is only since aug 2
<@lysol> lysol@beatmox:~/irclogs/gnaa$ cat \#gnaa.log | grep jews | wc -w
<@lysol> 6279
<@lysol> that's roughly 448 times jews is said daily
<+incog> thats an average of 18.6 Jph
<+incog> jews per hour
#34181
<Paradidle> I wonder what a dog thinks right before it humps someones leg... "I dont know what it is, but I'm gonna fuck it."
#24993
<secracy> what would be the correct way to be able to have !! in my php script ?
<sZombie> secracy: what?
<secracy> my two exclimation marks arent showing up on my form
<sZombie> secracy: you need to do a double-back-flip-exclamation-mark-escape
#5614
<quatoria> you shat on your daughter? disgusting pervert.
<Plaid> No, you freak. I puked on her.
#4456
<HailBrak> me: "we should form a company that makes manly china patterns"
<HailBrak> my friend: "i agree. i mean, how much success am i supposed to have when all the patterns are called "tender blossom" or some shit? i want one called, like, "Glock" or "Beer and Tits" or "Lets Burn Down Fucking Pier 1"
#10913
<Random> Actually, I'm not the devil. I'm an interested third-party broker. Unfortunately, not being the devil, I can't change the size of your ass.
#29360
<MP0werd> sweet, labor day!
<MP0werd> no school
* MP0werd immediately starts procrastinating
<Colin> I'll do that later
#53708
<cmantito> I just found an old briefcase
<cmantito> with all my 2600 magazines in it
<cmantito> and a can of Crisco.
<cmantito> ... ><
<celti> ...
<celti> a can of Crisco?
<cmantito> I have NO idea.
#30167
* OverlordQ changes topic to 'Forget Bayes, We need the Stalin Mail Filter (TM) -- it detects spam, hunts down the spammer, and exiles them to Siberia.'
#311302
<dn5> I have int start = 1476620495; and int end = 1476620495 (unix timestamp), but if I have int res; and then res = end - start, res returns 0 when printf with %d
<dn5> why?
<izalove> because it's the same number?
<fstd> duh
<dn5> okay thats not supposed to happen haha
<fstd> ,reset
<candide> Days since our last accident: 0
Comment: ##c at freenode
#8511
<dr_rotcod> i wonder if my life sucks cause i jerk off after i pray
#101511
<Cherokee> In other news:
<Cherokee> An African-American Congresswoman reportedly complained that the names of hurricanes are all Caucasian sounding. She would prefer some names that reflect African-American culture such as Chamiqua, Tanisha, Woeisha, Shaqueal, and Jamal.
<Slayden> What about Slaynisha?
<Cherokee> She would also like the weather reports to be broadcast in language that people on the street can understand because one of the problems in New Orleans is that regular folks didn't understand the seriousness of the situation due to the racially biased language of the weather report.
<Cherokee> I can hear it now... A weatherman on the gulf coast saying...
<Cherokee> Wazzup, mutha-fuckas! Her-i-cane Chamiqua be headin' fo' yo' ass like Leroy on a crotch rocket!
<Cherokee> Bitch be a category fo' !
<Cherokee> So grab yo' chirren, yo' Hos, be leavin' yo' crib, and head fo' da nearess guv'mint office fo' yo
<Cherokee> FREE shit!
#6607
<niff|n> why do you have so much porn Greebo?
<Greebo> 'cos i like masturbating, niffin.
#1543
<Amanda> I remember being in Europe
<Amanda> and I'd call shaft from payphones to ask if we'd gotten the channel back yet
#311554
<APTX_> so
<APTX_> I unpacked my switch and I turn it on for the first time. I felt it rumble a bit. After a second I realized that it was an earthquake and not the console...
<DerIdiot|work> ba da bish
<APTX_> the timing was really good
#33113
<goatasaur> she is attractive
<goatasaur> but she has more issues than tv guide
Comment: #fark on Irvingnet
#303792
<emFox> Kali ma!
* emFox rips Novu's still-beating heart out of his chest and lowers his body into a flame pit.
<emFox> Bali Mangthi Kali Ma!
<Novu_Ferret> This is how I know he loves me