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#58699
MadSkz: i was arguing with my dad last night
MadSkz: and i called him a terrorist (hes muslim)
padawan: lol..what did he do then
MadSkz: threaten me with a box cutter
#5647
<Plaid> We got the "Share Minutes" plan. Call it family bondage.
#19391
<Vulpes> I feel fine.
<Su-chan> Goooooooood.
<Su-chan> *hands Vulpes a cookie*
<Vulpes> Actually, I have a slight tummyache. Too many cummy bears, I think.
<Vulpes> ...
<Vulpes> gummy.
<Vulpes> I'm going to go back to writing now.
#50180
<DangerousCurves> man
<DangerousCurves> now i wanna go into a store
<DangerousCurves> and buy a pregnancy test
<DangerousCurves> then come back in 5 mins and buy some wire coathangers
#46763
<Macks> holy fuck i just witnessed the coolest thing ever
<Macks> i was out on my porch smoking and there was some guy walking up the road with a bag of liquor
<Macks> this car pulled up next to him and i could hear this lady start lecturing the guy on how bad alcohol is
<Macks> the guy just stood there and was taking it, when out of nowhere the guy starts screaming random obscenities at her, he swings his bag of liquor and smashes it into the windshield
<Macks> you can hear the lady freaking out and screaming about calling the cops and shit, she starts to speed off and the guy picks up this huge rock and chucks it at the car, smashing the back window into pieces
<HOBBEs> ahahha serves her right
<Macks> moral of the story, lecturing a drunk will get you nowhere
#34579
<joe> http://joe.neoturbine.net:8000/packages < an incomplete log of everything i hav compiled and installed over the yrs
<DimaV> ^ ---- proof that u need to get out to RL more often
#17390
<@Afterglow> what's the point of irc anyway
<@Afterglow> everyone idles
< destruct> the "point" is that if you take the third word spoken on the second tuesday of every month of the the third person down in each channel you visit on irc, they will form a description of the path to the lost city of atlantis
#309120
<chernobyl> Last night, Chewbacca and I were having a conversation in my billion dollar mansion about how much we hate people who lie on the Internet...
<mabus> well there's lying, and then there's exaggerating about your wife and apartment
#13594
* Darth-Phenom tries not to laugh...
<SarahS> Never supress a laugh, or it ends up the other end.
#3351
<Wes> Anything good coming on TV tonight?
<kolby> maybe nWo will return
<Wes> Anything good that doesn't involve dudes in their underwear slap-fighting so they can get a new belt to wear to the Gay Pride Parade?
#9391
<Cienna> were you breast fed?
<Ragnarok> yes
<Ragnarok> recently in fact
#29514
<jebus> brb, sex
#308490
<PyroPyro> a guy just fax'd me a paper with text "i dont know how this works i will just email the doc to you"
#34141
<Josh> wow. my great-grandmother died :(
<serenade> sry
<serenade> feel better u
<Josh> well, on one hand I'm sad that she died
<Josh> on the other hand she was a total bitch that alienated the entire family and caused untold amounts of greif
<serenade> ah
<serenade> similar situation with my great grandma
<serenade> we wanted to speed things up, so we got her to start smoking
<serenade> she used to light the cigs backwards
<serenade> funny as hell
#33991
(lithrye) I'm experiencing an annoying problem.
(lithrye) hlds is killing my ISP's router.
(Silicon) and how exactly do they say it's doing that
(lithrye) it's causing it to drop packets.
(Silicon) what are they using Fischer Price, My first router?
#3340
(koch): !need some help
(koch): !anyone in private please
(@Lynkx): koch: what the hell are you doing
(@dc): hes an idiot
(@Lynkx): !i want a vagina
(@Lynkx): shit
(@Lynkx): don`t werk
#2580
<salaman> Tzuri3l: hehe, there's a reason I charge $450/hr you know :)
<M5sedan_> wow, you must give really good head to charge that much ;)
<salaman> M5sedan: want to try? 10 hour minimum , and no pull-back policy ... 50% upfront ... got the money?
<M5sedan_> no pull-back policy = you swallow? ;)
<salaman> M5sedan_: yes, and also means If you come, I still charge you the 10hrs :) ... LOL
#60345
<zackeh> Shit. Gym assignment.
<zackeh> Why would you need good flexibility in your regular lifestyle?
<zackeh> In case I find a $50 bill on the floor?...and need to bend to pick it up.
<darkmonkey> SEX LOL
<darkmonkey> say sex...DO ITDOITDOITDOIT
<zackeh> Okay. I'll write something + sex
<darkmonkey> for wierd positions
<zackeh> LOL.
<darkmonkey> like when she has her feet over your shoulder
<darkmonkey> so she has a better orgasm
<darkmonkey> (fuck that's good.)
<zackeh> LOLOL.
<zackeh> LMAO.
<darkmonkey> say that..see what your gym teacher says
<zackeh> Done. Having improved flexibility can help you throughout your daily activities. Examples of activities that require a good flexibility is during sexual intercourse. For instance, each position needs good flexibility to acquire the perfect "feeling." One being when the girl has her feet over your shoulder, which results in an extreme orgasm.
<zackeh> He'll probably laugh. My gym teacher is a joker.
#62094
Speckz: her orgasms sound like throwing a cardboard box into a fireplace
#9227
<DJ> apparently, a friend of mine has split with his g/f "for a couple of mouths"
<DJ> im assuming thats a typo
#6547
<Soulphonat> My cat only speaks in analog
<Soulphonat> it's cute
#5349
<Guilty> I dont kid around with my fat chicks
<Guilty> Theres one simple golden rule: No fat chicks.
<Guilty> Golden because thats the color of the Golden Arches, the perferred eating place of Fat Chicks
#308772
<TheDancingLobster> yeah
<TheDancingLobster> i tend not to read code anyway
<TheDancingLobster> i just glare at it
#32810
<Kneecaps> anybody up for some key signing?
<Kneecaps> nobody about :(
<SlayerXP> key signing?
<SlayerXP> as in "hello complete stranger I met on IRC, please sign my GPG key so people will trust the key more."
<Kneecaps> yes
<Kneecaps> thats right
<SlayerXP> . <- the point -> your direction of travel
#32395
<ducklord> getting interested is for losers
<ducklord> winners go "..."