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#36682
* Rjx sets mode: +o utopian
* Rjx sets mode: -o utopian
<+utopian> if ophood was like sex, I have just been flashed
Comment: #geekissues

#51410
* BuRn sets mode: +v g
* DamDevil sets mode: +v g
<+g> oh oh oh..can i trade my two +v's for a larger prize? :o

#3510
<Demamas> RAWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWR! *explodes*
<Nyphur> BAD! NO BONE FOR Demamas! BACK IN YOUR CAGE !!
*** Signoff: Demamas (Ping timeout)
<Nyphur> oops
<Nyphur> I forgot I left his cage off the server

#3293
<Object> ric and JibberJim, cna you guys take your little gay fantasies elsewhere?
<ric> hey, my gay fantasies are not "little"...

#14519
Craig> craig's penis - 8===========================D O: - spooky
<Spooky> Your "penis" is less that 3 inches long.

#24166
dergrue: what's the name of that program that gives you a random meal to eat when you can't pick something?
barry: 'mom'

#21278
afkun: "funkymonkey> My band is called Imation CDR 74m 650 MB....have you seen our CD's?"
Pixie7186: wtf?
Pixie7186: i dont get it...
afkun: ally, look at your CD-Rs.
afkun: what do they say?
afkun: now scroll up and re-read the statement.
Pixie7186: hahahaha
Pixie7186: thaats so funny
Pixie7186: lol

#16866
<MartinBlank> I knew a guy who dressed up for Halloween as a giant penis with ferns growing around the base, and said he was dressed as a dickweed.

#301836
<@PZT> "I want you to taste these," she panted as she unbuttoned her blouse, revealing two full-grown California grizzly bears. I was on the ground before it even clicked. I glanced upwards and wove my head to the left as a set of 2" claws plunged downward at me. They grazed the side of my face. It stung like hell. One of them was sitting on my left arm; I couldn't move. I felt around for the coat hanger she'd thrown to the floor just minutes ago. A careless move for an agent, I thought to myself. I twisted it around my wrist, forming a crude hook, and jabbed at the one on top of me. It rolled over, uttering primal groans of agony as blood dripped from its eyes. I slashed blindly to my left. I didn't break the fur, but it was enough. The second bear shifted its weight, and I was able to pry my arm free. Still half-naked, I grabbed the padlocked Armani suitcase and I stumbled out the motel room door.
<Scizor300> What the hell?
* Stoney is now known as Stonaway
<@PZT> I swore silently to myself as I dashed toward the dimly lit lobby. She'd been one of them all along. An agent. The Movement had warned me not to let down my cover, even for a minute. Why hadn't I listened? A prostitute, in the beat-down slums of Madrid? What was I thinking? Her name... Bertha. Bear-tha. She'd been dangling it in front of my face the entire night, but I had been too horny to listen. Or care, for that matter.
<+Mach> What the fuck?
<@PZT> I burst out the front door and ran down the street towards a departing bus. I didn't care where it was going; no human can outrun a hungry grizzly bear on foot. I heard screams behind me, followed by roars and a horrible gnashing sound. I stuck my good arm between the closing doors, pried them open and stepped on board. I threw a few coins at the flabbergasted bus driver and made my way to a seat, ignoring the similarly confused faces around me. It didn't matter to me; the honey was safe. That was all that mattered nowadays.
Comment: #armonte's_channel on irc.esper.net

#3599
<xeiro> O_6: what does updating your kernel actaully do
<O_6> xeiro, gets me the chicks

#25152
<kolby> shit I'm sick, just got out of the hospital
<Scofco> You ok?
<kolby> Yea but Ball Reduction surgery is no cup of tea

#319
<Garr|ncha> metallica is a terrible mix of heavy metal and country

#4575
<Glex25> Space Left On [ C: 5.29/8.87 GB. D: 9.91/19.73 GB. E: 52.14/153.38 GB. Total: 67.34/181.98 GB ] .
<Scofco> dear lord
<phaded> holy good god
<phaded> how do you sleep at night?!

#2685
<nird> no i would never associate myself with ravers. i listen to intellegent music like nirvana, rush, and tori amos

#8373
<leena> has anyone heard of the lord of the rings
<Serge_of_Aruni> NO, WHAT IS THAT?
<Serge_of_Aruni> IS THAT SOME CARNIVAL GAME?
<Serge_of_Aruni> WITH BOTTLES AND HOOPS?

#2820
[Lord-Data] hell, woudlnt mind a girlfriend
[Duckarse] ditto
[incorrect] there's always ebay

#10071
<Zero> I had a totally hot chemistry teacher once. She used to always say "Uh huh." and show her ass. Win XP is like that.

#16904
<kdoom> Duke: you need a hobby
<DukeNukem> kdoom: like beastiality?
<kdoom> perfect

#6432
<PI^2> my first puter was c-64
<PI^2> I had many nasty games on c-64 :D
<PI^2> like 'fast masturbation' and such :)
<PI^2> that game was soo weird :D
<PI^2> though it had good graphics for a c-64 game :)

#298437
<paul> just remember
<paul> in linux, hostname -s does a shortened hostname
<paul> in solaris, hostname -s set's the machine's hostname to -s
<paul> imagine my confusion when my solaris box kept getting its hostname changed to -s everyday
<paul> before I realized i had a script that was supposed to use the machine's hostname as part of a tar file

#8070
<whippy-X> Max Payne (the game) looks cool, but Max Payne (the character) looks like he's taking a perpetual shit
<whippy-X> and it's a bit of a ghey name too eh? Max Payne. get it? Max PAIN. very lame. how about he just calls himself Action Man.

#305711
* fantasyprone (fantasypro@hide-3089BE47.static.tpgi.com.au) Quit (Ping timeout)
* Apathy runs off to sleep
<Apathy> also tell fantasyprone i said "saw that coming!"
<snark> future fantasyprone says to tell you she saw your mom coming last night
<snark> I have a time machine
<snark> and will pass on your message to avoid a paradox
* fantasyprone (fantasypro@hide-3089BE47.static.tpgi.com.au) has joined #elitists
<snark> fantasyprone: Apathy said to tell you he saw that coming
<fantasyprone> if you see Apathy again, you can tell him I saw his mom coming
<snark> Will do.
* snark hops in a time machine and jumps back a couple of minutes
* snark emerges from the time machine again.
<snark> All done.
<fantasyprone> thanks

#3784
<Joshua> funny how sodomy and clowns are linked in my head... i'd better not investigate that any further...

#298575
<mathrick> so there's this song, right, that goes "all I want to do is make love to you"
<mathrick> this is a classic case of an inexperienced / bad coder using unnecessarily verbose and inefficient expressions in a misguided attempt to make things more readable
<mathrick> compare the idiomatic version: "all I want to do is you". Shorter, more readable AND more to the point
<mathrick> remember, kids, not using idiomatic expressions and commenting on obvious parts of the code will get you to the special code hell

#6706
<boomer> mount rushmore, contrary to popular opinion, did not grow that way

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