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#7954
<wisner> I walked past a protest on Market Street yesterday evening.
<wisner> I didn't burst out laughing, but I really had to work for it.
<wisner> It was JEWISH LESBIANS FOR PEACE IN THE MIDDLE EAST.
<wisner> There was singing.
#307623
<azonenberg> wordpress is an unauthenticated remote shell that, as a useful side feature, also contains a blog
#3334
<lan_rover> i hate reruns.
<DAL9000> as do i
<lan_rover> i wish the tv stations would just say: "We're sorry.. we have nothing new to show you.. so please go do something productive."
#50471
so far gone fia: i fell asleep today in class
so far gone fia: it was so nice
scythen32: they don't kill you for that sort of thing at your school?
so far gone fia: well, we were watching a movie
so far gone fia: on buddhism
so far gone fia: i was "meditating"
#1289
<Wazm> I spent the entire day being normal, now that I'm home, I just want to duct tape fuzzy green pipe cleaners to my head, turn on the strobe, take off my clothes, and IRC.
#15618
<Icaby> i think im like 5'1 260 <Paul_Bunyan> Cool, a human sphere
#54900
<XenoDemon> So it is 3am, and I am sleeping
<XenoDemon> Some girl comes into my dorm room (Door isin't locked, room mate is still on computer)
<XenoDemon> She mumbles something to my room mate who had no idea who she was
<XenoDemon> Sits on my bed, then lays down in my bed (I am still in it), takes my blanket, and starts to go to sleep, then knocks her head against mine.
<XenoDemon> I go "Who the hell are you? What's your name?" "Aisha" "Where do you live?" "Ogg" (Another dorm)
<XenoDemon> "you're in the wrong dorm" "what? no I'm not" "Well um I need to use this bed, go back to Ogg ok?" "Haha... Ok... bye" and then she leaves
<XenoDemon> I know it is easy to get random drunk girls into bed, but that was just ridiculus.
#7153
<bumr> maybe he makes mad love to the penguin
<dys> Perhaps Cathy wears a Tux the Penguin suit for him.
<dys> And then he "debugs her code" all night long.
<bumr> cunnilinux
#108878
NeverWakeUp1229: So I had a major conflict between my ego and my cock today
MotherBound0: don’t the two go hand in hand?
MotherBound0: or dick in hand?
NeverWakeUp1229: Whatever
NeverWakeUp1229: So I was turning in my essay at the same time as some hot chick in my history class
NeverWakeUp1229: We both go for the stapler, and naturally I snag it first
NeverWakeUp1229: So my cock goes, “Be a gentleman and offer her the stapler! It’s one less step for you to go to get in her pants.”
NeverWakeUp1229: And my ego says, “No, don’t be a pussy. You don’t owe her shit.”
MotherBound0: so what happened?
NeverWakeUp1229: I offered her the stapler and she told me to go ahead and use it first
NeverWakeUp1229: Best of both worlds
MotherBound0: you possess the most fucked up sense of logic ever
#20749
xenophile: been awhile since i've done a mailman
xenophile: DO NOT PUT THAT ON BASH>ORG!!@@!!@
#10904
<StrScream> my pants are back up, after almost no downtime in the last 2 years.
#4801
<Amanda> Oh yeah, a thug did his commemorative speech on "P Diddy" today
<kisama_> fuck thugs
<kisama_> thugs will amount to shit later
<kisama_> there's a bunch of thugs here taking CISCO NETWORKING CERTIFICATION courses
<kisama_> they are all "YEAH MAN I'M GONNA MAKE 80K COMING RIGHT OUT OF HIGH SCHOOL MAN!"
#28824
<Thom> I'm British. In history classes over here to study world war two someone holds up a picture of Churchill and we masturbate in silence for forty minutes.
#12949
<boarsai> funnily enough it took me a few minutes to realise my pen didn't have "alt + z" capabilities...
#2613
<kyourek> KEEEEEEEEEEEEEIIIIIIIIAAAAAAAAAAAAAEEEEEEEEEE!!
<DrWoody> ... What?
<kyourek> Just practicing my karate.
#13250
<+phunk> i have to send 8 photos of myself in
<@fraggle> one for each angle
<@fraggle> they're going to make you into a doom monster
#54312
<markos_64> GreyKnight: any idea on what to do with a router that screams on contact with holy water?
<markos_64> it seems to have real fun dropping, duping, or delaying my packets
<GreyKnight> Carefully open the cover
<GreyKnight> Poke inside with a screwdriver
<GreyKnight> Dodge any sparks and/or angry ancestors
<markos_64> Bob already suggested that i use a hammer
<GreyKnight> Then, replace the cover
<GreyKnight> and very very carefully
<GreyKnight> sell it on eBay to some poor sucker and buy a new one with the proceeds
<markos_64> shut the fuck up. i already bought it on internet auction.
<markos_64> i'm not going to ever do it again.
<GreyKnight> See? It worked for the previous owner.
#214191
<Gnome> Yo momma so fat, Atlas got confused, dropped the earth, and picked her up
#18503
<splat_v2> bob is in a pigfucker mood!
* HrdwrBoB goes off in search of a pig :)
<splat_v2> you wanna make it squeal!
<splat_v2> and its good cause they dont sweat!
* HrdwrBoB doesn't ask how you know that
#69440
<Anony-X>I use Photoshop for morally questionable purposes.
#21513
<eDAN> That makes me think...has there been a wirework porn movie called "The Mattress" yet?
<eDAN> If not, I need to contact Larry Flynt and Tsui Hark pronto.
<eDAN> "You see...the machines realized that mankind is a natural battery, and we put off joules and joules of heat in our everyday life." "Whoa." "And damn, we REALLY put off a lot of heat while we fuck."
<Gavok> "There is no condom."
<eDAN> "People...are like...a virus. But a virus with nice tits."
#2201
<Guilty> I see, your ignorance expands far beyond ATI video cards
#304801
<SaberUK> Rfsancho: do soviet russia jokes make sense in russian?
<Rfsancho> they do if you reverse them
<Rfsancho> "in US of A, you drive CARS!"
#12347
<@skold> is this going to be a 'my penis is bigger than yours' conversation? cuz i have a ruler and a camera.
#4397
<Sassy> if the GC ends up sucking, i will start calling it the LameCube and reap the benefits of my witticisms