m.QDB.us

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#307040
< Tommy`> cd ~
< Daeken> Tommy`: you're heading home?

#137186
< stiv2k> so, i have to write a term paper on a 'controversial text'... any ideas?  just spit them out
<JimmyDee_> satanic verses
< stiv2k> ahah
< spb> the holy bible
< stiv2k> that would be surely interesting
< fred> Novell's agreement with microsoft ¬_¬
Comment: #defocus on freenode

#16808
<[OKW]Buchwald> is it "cheating" on your girlfriend if you invite a couple of girls over to get naked, and you end up jerking off on to their tits, but you never touch them?
<[SS]Corky> NO!
<[SS]Corky> did this happen?
<[OKW]Buchwald> well, gimme a few minutes :)

#8373
<leena> has anyone heard of the lord of the rings
<Serge_of_Aruni> NO, WHAT IS THAT?
<Serge_of_Aruni> IS THAT SOME CARNIVAL GAME?
<Serge_of_Aruni> WITH BOTTLES AND HOOPS?

#95753
<xkcd> honestly, I'm not entirely sure that I will ever get tired of amusing pictures of cats
<xkcd> FORTUNATELY, SOMEONE INVENTED THE INTERNET

#307922
<@Rjx> I've noticed a trend in modern SEO
<@Rjx> which involves shitting up your URLs and shitting up your content
<@Rjx> to meet some imaginary standards

#4918
<joey`> mcdonalds fired me for trying to install irc on the teleprompter

#55058
<zb^3_> sektie
<zb^3_> i can't just stand here with my cock in my hand
<Workdug> start moving your hand up and down in a smooth, continuous motion
<Workdug> it feels really good after a while
<rpenguin> unless your hands are covered in habanero sauce :(
<goldfish> words of wisdom
Comment: efnet #okcupid

#33701
<pauly> I'll fuck you hard in the ass later honey
<pauly> oh wrong room.
Comment: #q3w

#38194
<DigDug> how do i read a .job file?
<dekkon> you have to go to work.exe
Comment: #geekissues @ EFnet

#49903
<mrmitch> question
<ObsidianX> answer
<ObsidianX> man, that was easy

#307708
* rycuda has just been offered an amp
<@Al> After being given a shock like that it's wise to have a coulomb-down period
<@mgsts> I'm trying to decide watt a suitable punishment for these awful puns is
<@OneCruelBagel> mgsts: it's not his volt, he has troubles at ohm.
<@OneCruelBagel> We should let him have some peace faraday.

#932
<livewire> I would like to put those fuckers who are protesting bonsaikitten.com in glass bottles

#36182
(@|Lebanon|) Broadcast: ATTENTION: TheAvatar (Søren Jensen) turned 20 years old today! I (Barhom) just wanted to congrat in some special way, and I thought of all of you guys helping me, I just need you guys todo this: /msg TheAvatar HAPPYBDAY!!!
(@Biggs`) what the bejesusing fuck
(@Biggs`) stfu
(@Biggs`) noob
... a minute or two later ...
(@|Lebanon|) Broadcast: Since you guys did a great job and accidently crashed TheAvatar's mirc he couldn't reply to you all and say Thank you! (He really wanted too) - Anyways you can see a early printscreen that he took only couple of seconds after the last msg here http://www.bullettimes.com/bday1.jpg
(@Biggs`) *accidentally* crashed, wtf
(@Biggs`) that was about as deliberate as it gets

#4445
<K0ffing> you should Photoshop Raz ... I'll give you a dollar if you can make his face look less like a butt

#7857
[Hive] You know what really pisses me off? People who point at their wrist when asking for the time. Yeah, buddy, I know where my watch is. Where the fuck is yours? Do I point at my crotch when I ask for the bathroom?

#45328
<qviri> Sorry, I guess I'm not 1335 enough.

#13841
<yrlnry> When was 'O Canada' introduced?  Must have been
pretty recently---maybe in the 1960's?
<ignatz> "A Canada" through "N Canada" were failures. Then
MacKenzie MacKenzie, a defrocked Mountie from Lard Heights,
Alberta, had a flash of inspiration one day while drinking
maple syrup.
<ignatz> The rest is history.

#48144
<Dogan> today in school the funniest thing ever happened at an assembly
<Dogan> i was up in the stands as part of the band, watching the cheerleaders do some show
<Dogan> and one of the girls loses her balance and falls off the top of the pyramid
<Dogan> So without thinking, i stand up and do a "Wah wah wah wahhhhhhhhhhhhhh" on my trombone
<Dogan> never saw that cheerleader again

#13315
*** Joins: Tallpaul
*** Semper is now known as Smallpaul
*** Smallpaul is now known as Semper
*** Tallpaul is now known as Semper_is_gay
*** Semper is now known as Tallpaul
*** Semper_is_gay is now known as Semper
*** Quits: Semper (Kill by NickServ (RECOVER command used by Tallpaul))
*** Tallpaul is now known as Semper
<Semper> I'm a dick
<Semper> :D

#6631
<Hawx> wtf is Scotty
<Shinji> Hawx - ScottyFox, he's in here occasionaly, I used to live with him in Canada.
<Hawx> scottyfox is one letter away from being scattyfox
<Shinji> Hawx - and you're four letters away from being 'fuck'.
<Hawx> :D

#8218
<DotSPF> just got myself a shitload more lesbo porn
<killck> good?
<DotSPF> damn they have so much more fun when we're not around

#32396
<Gothic_CatGirl> Who wants to give me their Billing Information?

#32007
<lumina> would you tape a broken nuclear warhead together
<mnk> because they didnt have any super glue
<mnk> i mean think about it

#297667
<Khassaki> HI EVERYBODY!!!!!!!!!!
<Judge-Mental> try pressing the the Caps Lock key
<Khassaki> O THANKS!!! ITS SO MUCH EASIER TO WRITE NOW!!!!!!!
<Judge-Mental> fuck me

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