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#1348
<Sharkey> Why is it whenever I hear the phrase 'Battered Women' I think of fried food?
#16883
[#perl]
<fraggle> how many days does it take to compile perl 5.6.1 on a 486?
<diclophis> haha
#32108
<retry> dude I'm sick
<retry> got me a fever and everything
<monk> i recommend oral sex.
<retry> give or receive?
<monk> man, you ARE sick.
#2590
<Legind> I cant remember my earliest memory
#28726
<+stackman> you got laid?
<Zippy2> no
<Zippy2> slept with her
<+stackman> ...
<@HamWork> fag
<@HamWork> fucking fag
<@HamWork> she was like "would you like to go to bed with me" Zippy is like "Sure, ZzZzZz"
--later--
<Zippy2> well
<Zippy2> we did watch a porno
<@HamWork> only Zippy could fuck up odds like that
#11203
<GenOberst> I had to mule kick out, and grab his foot to reverse it
<GenOberst> bent his big toe outwards away from the foot...
<Tac0> oh nothing compared to my day, I flew an F-16 across the DMZ for kicks, resuerected Bruce Lee then killed him again with my bare hand (one tied behind my back), then after that i proceeded to sleep with 20 supermodels at the same time, and to top it off i bitch-slapped the pope
#51854
<Mark> oh yeah. so my roommate got me to sit down and play need for speed underground on the xbox. he thought it would be funny because i was drunk, so i would fuck up, and he would laugh at me. except i ended up doing better and beating a bunch of races i wasnt able to do sober.
<Mark> which means im a better driver when im drunk
<Mark> i just have to find a way to explain that to the police.
#11701
<Lt Hawkins> someone from 127.0.0.1 keeps trying to hack me!
<Podex> You should send them a virus to destroy their computer!!!!!!
#30255
<Scott> I thought they were all saying "Hi, Hitler!" Makes sense, since they're waving...
#12097
<RxBandit> just remember, it's up to us kids to make sure Bill Gates doesn't get his hands on Linux
#32855
<kip> it seems like every region of the us has some terrible and ridiculous problem
<RedDye4o> yes
<kip> like fire ants or earthquakes or thawing dog poo in the spring
<RedDye4o> America: a union of terrible and ridiculous problems
#305889
Jello_Raptor converts RebeccaRGB to a more print frindly color system
=-= RebeccaRGB is now known as RebeccaCMYK
#90
<matt`> It is illegal to use UNIX in conjunction with a member of the opposite sex. This could prevent copulation-2.1.3-20.i386.tar.gz from compiling correctly.
#53872
<snarffles> Jesus I am so damn tired
<snarffles> I could literally fall asleep right here...
<snarffles> werrrrrrrwre34334""%%^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
<mellomeh> wow, you have fallen asleep in a comic fashion on your keyboard and managed to press enter despite your 'head' hitting keys nowhere near it
<mellomeh> you've also managed to hold shift near the end of that
#7369
<NaNaMagic> he is never too busy to answer our prayers
<qux> satan or god? you're confusing me now?
<NaNaMagic> he has extensions on his ears
<qux> like Mr Spock?
<NaNaMagic> yes jesus has ears for all
#29120
<Firefly> Time for my prayers:
<Firefly> Our Father, who 0wnz heaven, j00 r0ck!
<Firefly> May all 0ur base someday be belong to you!
<Firefly> May j00 0wn earth just like j00 0wn heaven.
<Firefly> Give us this day our warez, mp3z, and pr0n through a phat pipe.
<Firefly> And cut us some slack when we act like n00b lamerz, just as we teach n00bz when they act lame on us.
<Firefly> Please don't give us root access on some poor d00d'z box when we're too pissed off to think about what's right and wrong, and if you could keep the fbi off our backs, we'd appreciate it.
<Firefly> For j00 0wn r00t on all our b0x3s 4ever and ever, 4m3n.
#1330
(fub) I walked into a police station once to pick up some court papers, and I smoked a joint about 5 blocks away and I was was sitting in there for awhile and I looked down at my shoes and the roach was on the front tounge of my shoe ;/
#33892
(+PsychicSword) the internet will have gone out of fashion by the time ima gets off 56K
#52440
<The_Franchise> there were 4 girls working at each security check point at the airport in tokyo
<The_Franchise> 2 were handling bags and stuff
<The_Franchise> 1 was checking the xrays
<The_Franchise> and 1 was there to bow to you after you walk thru the metal detector
#1775
<wild> i just asked a girl out
<wild> been 6 minutes no reply :|
<wild> maybe icq wasn't the way to go
#13487
<Zeratul-SK> Cello, I'm tired of you in the top of the users list. :P
<Cellosoft> zer, I'm tired of you on the User list
#11222
e l i t e m r p (11:56:26 PM): 80 dagrees 95% humidity
Tom McFarlin 4 (11:56:50 PM): yesterday it was 90 deg and 90humidity here
Tom McFarlin 4 (11:56:53 PM): so i can relate
e l i t e m r p (11:57:47 PM): yeah but im wearing a 300 pound suit of lard
#309369
<theazman> Hey everyone, how do I return an object?
<k5__> return object;
<theazman> Thanks
<deuteros_> that was a tough one
Comment: ##java
#21987
<demiurge> why dont you unban me from bots already
<demiurge> helo?
<TML> 501 5.0.0 HELO requires domain address
#1567
<ckx> i wish i had a gf who was into really cheap things
<ckx> like 5 cent rings from vending machines
<ckx> then i'd be in heaven
<ckx> "yah i got you something today... it's a gumball"
<ckx> "OH WOW LETS FUCK"
<ckx> stupid women
<mdl> haha