Random | Latest | Best | Full Site
#26308
Methodical Pain: but tomatoes are fruits
TheOffspring326: no they're not!
TheOffspring326: they merely prefer the company of other tomatoes, thats all!
#59744
<Knightmare> Well that was a night of fear and terror.
<Timork> ?
<Knightmare> I bought a bag of mushrooms and a bottle of Everclear.
<Knightmare> Settled down for a nice evening of mind altering psychadelia
<Timork> Bad trip huh?
<Knightmare> Horrible, I never want to go through it again.
<Knightmare> Somewhere along the line I installed emacs.
#14711
<Snacktify> what happens if a girl who is in the olympics is going to have her period during competition?
<deltax> then they put off the 100m cunnilingus for a week
<deltax> "this event cancelled due to bad turf" etc
#302269
Vasir: there was an evil dick staring at me all day
Mel: O_O WTF.. um are you okay?
Vasir: yeah i'm fine. it was starring me down through the windows all day though. i'm pretty sure it had malicious intent
Mel: Are you okay?
Vasir: yes.
*10 minutes or so pass*
Vasir: you know Mel, we never talk much anymore...
Mel: I know, but Vasir, why are you talking about dicks?
Vasir: I'm not?
Vasir: OH FUCK. I meant DUCK! AN EVIL DUCK WAS STARRING AT ME! NOT AN EVIL DICK!
#59761
<anotherpadawan> you know, the Nintendo DS ad campaign "Touching is good" is going to give whole new meaning to "blaming video games"...
#232500
IndigoNocturna: When the guy sat next to me on the bus, it reminded me that for most of my life, I thought that all older men had the same smell... and then I realized that the smell is booze.
#3600
<BombScare> hmmm...choices choices, either get dressed and go get lunch, or sit here and wait for dinner
<BombScare> damn im lazy
#16367
<cYner> you know, some times, I get all head fuct and then I type something and forget to hit enter, then after about 5 min it's not even part of the conversation anymore, then I just clear the line and all is well.
#140454
<1moreplz> having sex during a thunderstorm rocks. you can pretent you're taking part in the conception of the antichrist
#96
<VIVI> Xbox already has the following games:
<VIVI> Microsoft Word
<VIVI> Microsoft Excel
<VIVI> Solitaire
#311619
<@Wilber> Activity on gimpissues: Shortcut Ovelapping <https://gitlab.gnome.org/GNOME/gimp/issues/2183>
<gitlab-bot> Wilber: Error: GNOME: Impossible to get infos for GNOME/gimp issue 2183: 404: 404 Not found
<@Wilber> gitlab-bot: Error: "Error:" is not a valid command.
<gitlab-bot> Wilber: Error: "Error:" is not a valid command.
<@Wilber> gitlab-bot: Error: "Error:" is not a valid command.
<gitlab-bot> Wilber: Error: "Error:" is not a valid command.
<@Wilber> gitlab-bot: Error: "Error:" is not a valid command.
<gitlab-bot> Wilber: Error: "Error:" is not a valid command.
<@Wilber> gitlab-bot: Error: "Error:" is not a valid command.
<gitlab-bot> Wilber: Error: "Error:" is not a valid command.
<@Wilber> gitlab-bot: Error: "Error:" is not a valid command.
<gitlab-bot> Wilber: Error: "Error:" is not a valid command.
<@Wilber> gitlab-bot: You've given me 5 invalid commands within the last minute; I'm now ignoring you for 10 minutes.
<gitlab-bot> Wilber: You've given me 5 invalid commands within the last 60 seconds; I'm now ignoring you for 10 minutes.
<ankh> haha
Comment: #gimp
#111707
<Russa> but english is the dumbiest and easyest language to understand ever
#7936
*** Quits: TITANIC (Excess Flood)
#21702
<|_0gre_|> what does one do with 40 gigs?
<Wetzel> Bend over and I'll show you.
#44142
<Cenobite> I was self-employed, but my boss fired me
<Cenobite> that ass
#27956
<@timmo> man
<@timmo> my dad just brought home the coolest thing
<Mootar> what's her name?
<@timmo> its a 5' long plastic inflatable tube, you bind it in half
<@timmo> and clap the two sides together
<@timmo> and it makes this fucked up sound
<RuKK> <timmo> its a 5' long plastic inflatable tube
<RuKK> that was enough for me
<RuKK> ;x
<@timmo> hah
<Mootar> you gotta include the "coolest thing" bit
<@timmo> im easily amused
Comment: #geekissues
#68
<HomerJ> Microsoft could shit in a box, adn most people would buy it
#23528
<Task-> i used to be able to say "i like stick my fingers in my arse" in swedish, then i realised it wouldnt help me in a conversation
#18603
<RG-M1> i hope that if i ever get raped some day, it's by a monster with crazy penis tentacles, and penis fingers, too
<Tamahome> and that's one for the geekquotes page:P
#6963
<felix:#slackware> ne1 isn't here. try AOL
#20010
<RangerRick> wireless means never having to say, "AFK, bathroom"
#87102
<pallet> oh my god
<pallet> my daughter has been missing for a whole week now
<pallet> i'm so scared, i don't know what to do
<zene> my daughter isn't missing
<zene> that makes me a better parent right?
<zealo> i'm pretty sure it does
#70545
<Clipsy> There's a review on slashdot of a book called "Creating Web Pages with Ajax," and I was thinking
<Clipsy> I'd like to make a book called "Creating Web2.0 Content for Dummies"
<Clipsy> and then when someone opens the book
<Clipsy> a boxing glove on a spring comes out and punches them in the face
#1090
(MC_SpEcS) huggles...who are you?
(tiko-out) the blond chick who tried to suck you off @ God Is A DJ
(tiko-out) unless you got multiple blond chicks offering that
(tiko-out) she's the one who looked like a blonde muppet
#7355
<whyerhead> hrm. I couldn't get laid in a womens prison with a fist full of pardons