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#6711
* Racked recalls the past: my teacher said, "I have a 10-foot snake here"....to which I replied, "oh no you don't....snakes don't have feet!"
* GPF recalls saying something like that to a teacher and getting detention
#30649
<@AfroServ> ?back
<+eggbot> AfroServ is back from - TAKING A MAJOR SHIT - after 4days 23hrs 3mins 25secs
<+Chronic> lol thats one huge shit you had afro
<@AfroServ> i fell asleep on the can
<@AfroServ> the smell of it kept me knocked out for days
#108886
< thinkmad> I dont suppose anyone in here has ever even opened after effects
< thinkmad> or been within 100 yards of a computer with after effects installed
<@jonathans> i had a hangover once
Comment: #geekissues
#7890
<Fodz> I AM JUST NOT APPRECIATED AROUND HERE
<rabbitfood> not for your brains fods, just your arse. :)
#299433
* mib_a1mlh (43a93d21@widget.mibbit.com) has joined #buddhism
<mib_a1mlh> im a new buhdist and was wondering what should i focus on
* Quits: mib_a1mlh (43a93d21@widget.mibbit.com) (Client Quit)
<@urgen> focus on staying longer...
<@urgen> either that or spelling
Comment: efnet
#61709
<ToxicFrog|AFK> Hmm.
<ToxicFrog|AFK> Ok, question for the USians in the channel.
<ToxicFrog|AFK> First of all, the background - as a dual citizen, once I reach a certain point, I have to file US income tax returns even if I don't actually owe any taxes. And my dad has been giving me an overview of the US tax system.
<ToxicFrog|AFK> So, my question is this:
<ToxicFrog|AFK> What the hell?
<MyCatOwnz> Bwahahahahaha!
<@Tekkie007> Always happy to lend a hand to the CAians.
<ToxicFrog|AFK> Is the IRS made up entirely of monstrosities from outside the walls of reality that are inimical to life as we know it?
<Geminii> Yes.
<pixel> Yep.
<Geminii> Next question?
<@Tekkie007> And you've caught on to our tax system amazingly fast.
<ToxicFrog|AFK> Does your government hate students? Were the tax forms copied from the crawling, N-dimensional writings of madness itself on the walls of Rl'yeh, or are they the result of some even more malevolent process?
<Geminii> Yes, yes, and yes.
* ToxicFrog|AFK flails
Comment: #tsc on nightstar
#13608
<]Darkstar[> Everyone hit ctrl+v
* MMK[TP] hits ctrl+v... ctrl+v runs away
<MMK[TP]> Now I lost these two keys!
#1656
<JD> AFAIK, Anubis is the only Egyptian god who is often drawn with an
erect penis.
<JD> Really!
DigiGnðme> I thought they all were.
DigiGnðme> Oh no, that's the Kama Sutra.
#297725
<CShadowRun> windows keeps telling me i might be a victim of software counterfeiting :(
<CShadowRun> i don't think of myself as a victim, more of a benificiary
#8775
<GC> i bought new disposable razors
<GC> they have two blades each
<GC> i am astounded
<xen`> my mach 3 has 3 blades
<GC> and it costs more
<xen`> meh, it works good
<xen`> i can shave my asshair and my face and not have to go through 5 razors
#6443
<signine> "PIPE YOUR OUTPUT THROUGH THAT, BITCH!"
<far_call> "you can stick that in your pipe and awk it"
#311623
< brennyn> i once had to train a guy at work who i could not convince that 1 percent and 1 gallon are not "basically the same thing"
< brennyn> his explanaton was that milk comes in 2%
< brennyn> he wasn't trolling, he was actually stupid
< brennyn> he got fired less than a week later for pouring paint thinner into his eyes
<@snek-sensei> w-what
< brennyn> he was cleaning something that required lying down and crawling under the machine
< brennyn> he got to the part he needed to clean, held a cup of paint thinner above it, and poured directly into his face
< brennyn> because he forgot about gravity
<@snek-sensei> oh okay that makes sense
#11226
<CactusEarl> any of you want to kill my alegbra teacher, he hates me
<CactusEarl> he thinks im going to shoot him
<CactusEarl> "oh my lord earl why does your quiz paper say im gonna kill you mister rose"
#309830
< MadCamel> back in the day I used to go to sleep with bots running and get an SMS alarm on my phone when GMs would show up to talk to me. I could talk back via SMS too. That passed every botcheck because everything was screwed up back then and they were not allowed to use their judgment.. even though my clients were CLEARLY automated.
< MadCamel> That wouldn't fly now. That's a good thing. Heh.
< t3st3r> Hmm, reasonable :)
< V0id> MadCamel: because now you're too old to wake up within 2mins? :D
< MadCamel> V0id: that too! lol
#28317
<ThisIsASentenceInANick> Saber, just imagine yourself being gangbanged by moths. This is what will happen to you if you don't behave.
<Saber> what
<Saber> I didn't do anything
<Saber> and I have a bat
<Saber> I'll fight them off
<ThisIsASentenceInANick> That's not going to help a lot.
<ThisIsASentenceInANick> Can't you just feel their tiny cocks writhing against your skin, Saber?
<ThisIsASentenceInANick> Just straining to reach an orifice?
<ThisIsASentenceInANick> Do you like it?
<ThisIsASentenceInANick> Does it feel good?
<Saber> That's bizarre to the point that it doesn't affect me
#8722
<Cyb> I remember the first time I talked to my ex girlfriend on aim
<Cyb> and I said 'heh'
<Cyb> and she was like "I hate when people say that!"
<Cyb> that was like the most traumatic moment of my life
#106666
<Rogueboy|Work> what if I were to speak with intelligence?
<Raziel> it would look down on you
#300814
<jenna>sometimes i seriously hate my name yknow?
<jenna>like other people are jen or jenny or jennifer, and i'm jenna. with an a. it sounds weird. i hate it i hate it i hate it
<pat>yeah, people pat me on hte head when they leave. and then walk of chucklling, "no pun intended".
<jenna>LOL...not as bad as mine though, i have to say "argh" at the end of my name. jenargh.
<pat>why did mum have to give us shitty names
<jenna>i know eh...
<pat>hm why are we talking over irc when we live in the same house?
<jenna>yeah all this computer shit is getting to our heads. we need some fresh air. what happened to max? who's turn issert for walking him?
<pat>dad's
<jenna>oh
<jenna>well i reckon we should get some fresh air, afk our comps and talk irl
<jenna>but its too much effort getting up and going downstairs and out, farkkkkkk.
<pat>llol im outside on the picnic table with the supposed fresh air, i dont have to go anywhere.
<jenna>fuck you.
#306094
yaoi_prophet: i see a red node and i want it painted black
yaoi_prophet: no children any more, i want it to turn black
yaoi_prophet: i see inserts go by, no matter how many nodes within
yaoi_prophet: i know that my tree's max height is bounded O(log n)
Comment: #cobol
#751
[reidman ) why is there an ad for Windows Media Player on the Apple Quicktime site??
[|Dan| ) god only knows why
[|Dan| ) and he's laughing
#48808
Gamefreak1337: I hardly notice any diffrence between 500 kbits and this connection
Gamefreak1337: unless i'm downloading something
#17403
<hepkitten> also i appear to have lost my bf
<hepkitten> :<
<kinzillah> "lost"? does he respond to ping?
#11230
<David> topic lock off ?
<David> how
<David> ?
<DJ-Pyro> /msg chanserv help
<SSJ4xVegeta> how do i group my nicks 2gether
<DJ-Pyro> /msg nickserv help
<DJ-Pyro> you'll notice a pattern
#57424
< JaredCE> no, i had an idea for an ajax web2.0 calender that would pull details from flickr and google map
< shiruken> how far did you get?
< JaredCE> ermm
< JaredCE> i installed apache
#266270
Curt teh Juggler: our graduation ceremony was today, and right when some gamer nerd got his diploma, someone in the audience played the zelda "get item" music and he did the zelda spin-hold-out-item stance
Curt teh Juggler: it was quite possibly the most amazing thing ever.