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#2150
* Derek_ thinks costa ricans are wierd
<matts> I think people who spell weird "wierd" are weird
#14431
<antix> im bored
<antix> i think i might go mod my toilet
<Shady> what are you going to do? :S
<antix> i think i might add some little flashin lights so i can read the paper in the dark...
#306964
<+taras> my take on the world has improved since Firefox started giving me The Onion instead of BBC News when i type 'news' in the address bar
Comment: #bitfolk
#18583
Vizspring: time for dual-computer action :-)
dustbuster3001: LOL
SqueakyEggo: lol
SqueakyEggo: ROFL
SqueakyEggo: computer on computer barely legal action, eh?
#1385
(chronic1) i wouldn't like a virgin....i think they deserve a professional fuck the first time so they are not dissappointed....i could go down...but i am not the best fuck
...
(chronic1) if masterbation made you good, i'd be the best
#6965
<glasnost> kkf: we should get married, so you can be kkk.
<kkf> hmm... wow, another reason not to marry you :)
<glasnost> ouch, that backfired
#63
<Moot> masturbatin time
<Moot> I'm livin dangerously
<Moot> I'm not gonan check to see if my mom is asleep yet
#44934
* eLe sends hordes of lemmings over HolyGoat.
<HolyGoat> lemmings are cool :)
<HolyGoat> my g/f has lemmings
<eLe> Haha.
<HolyGoat> seriously :)
<rioter> does she make them all blow up?
<rioter> cause thats what i used to do
<HolyGoat> heh no, not the computer game
<rioter> computer game?
#28320
<Carp_AFK> i planned to dye my hair this weekend
<Carp_AFK> till i was told i was supposed to put vaseline all round my forehead, and wear gloves
<Carp_AFK> and theres no way im going to a shop buying some rubber gloves and a tub of vaseline
#30054
*** Signoff: usrbingeek (Quit: I patched Windows XP and all I got was this lousy reboot.)
#38848
<remisser> Man... I really have to walk in to Condomworld and see what kind of people work there.
<comet_11> they're probably dicks
#50715
(teh_Neo) Kylie Minogue - Can't Get You Out Of My Head
(teh_Neo) fucking song is stuck in my head
(teh_Neo) teh_Neo just noticed the irony in that =(
#55023
Xeno: I'll work for anyone who pays me enough and treats me good
Tony: how about I smack you around and pay you $5.15 an hour?
Xeno: haha i dont wanna do fast food
#300759
tfpen: kind of ironic that a "full service ad agency" outsources their site
tfpen: unless this is your employer...
nomercy: my entire career is doing websites for people who say they do websites
#310474
<TheHackOps> I thought i was paranoid because I encrypt all my business emails
<TheHackOps> Get a letter from ISP asking why i am doing it
<TheHackOps> So yep
<TheHackOps> Some desert island is looking pretty good guys
Comment: irc.freenode.net ##security
#295884
< withnail> i wonder
< withnail> if anyone has ever put </body> on a tombstone
#51174
Lucius: so im stuck hangin out with this emo kid
Lucius: he goes up to this hot girl and says "hey baby, what are you doing lateR?"
Lucius: she turns to him and goes "boy, i already have a pussy, i dont need another one" and walks away
Lucius: i couldnt stop laughing
Lucius: then he gets this sad look and tells me to shut up
Lucius: i calmly pull out my sharpie and draw a tear on his cheek
Lucius: he literally shrieks and runs away
#4488
<FM{FF1}> Rizen: I thought you didn't bang chicks, only me.
<FM{FF1}> ...men.
<FM{FF1}> GOD THAT WAS A BAD TYPO.
#18282
[cyclochuu] any of u guys ever fuck a watermelon after its been in the microwave
#19521
<winmutt> on the brighter side of things the waitress t the bar last nite gave me her phone number... might as well have read "this coupon is good for a free fuck"
#310959
<%n473> so I migrated our first client site to our new cloud environment yesterday
<%n473> and literally the very first browsing log we got
<%n473> on our first site
<%n473> first cloud-active client
<%n473> was a pornhub search for "big ass blonde lesbian milfs"
#148598
<LordLicorice> I made Goatse talk once
<LordLicorice> In a Scottish accent
<LordLicorice> There was some Budweiser thing
<LordLicorice> where you could upload your portrait
<LordLicorice> and assign eye points, lip points, etc.
<LordLicorice> and make yourself say things
<LordLicorice> so I uploaded Goatse
<LordLicorice> made him talk
<LordLicorice> chose Scottish accent
<LordLicorice> made him recite scripture about the End Times
#24170
[17:12] <SA-PYRoMaNiaC> Lesbians shouldn't be allowed to use dildos. They've made their choice.
#34236
<unchellmatt> weewoo: I had a spammer pissed at me for reporting her "Free Psychic Readings" mailings and getting her shut down. She flames me with "If you didn't want the mail, why didn't you just reply and ask to be removed?!?!"
<unchellmatt> I replied "You're the fucking psychic.... YOu figure it out"
#23907
<mog> !8BALL WILL MARA KICK ME IN TWO SECONDS FOR ABUSING THE CAPS LOCK BUTTON?
<FarkStatsBot> mog: You may rely on it.
* mog was kicked by Mara (Caps abuse - 100%)