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#29247
<Killrbyte> !googlepop "anal sex";"oral sex"
<migas> - "anal sex" is more popular than "oral sex" (2220000>1360000
<Video`> NO WAY
<Video`> FUCK THAT SHIT
<Killrbyte> Video`: Exactly.
#27913
<@bandXXX> HAHAHA clipse is on new justin timberlake album
<@bandXXX> sad thing is
<@Blaxthos> that you know this
#114281
<mario> wtf
<mario> you know your office is portal crazy when:
<mario> the cake in the kitchen has a sign saying "The cake lies" and sings "Still Alive" when you open the box
<mario> someone talked the contractor into making a few of the doors oval-shaped "portals" instead
<mario> complete with painted orange/blue patterns on each corresponding side
<mario> your file server is swinging from the ceiling aptly named "GLaDOS"
<mario> the new company motto is "There's a hole in the sky through which things may fly"
<mario> and there's a bunch of weighted ikea boxes with hearts on them scattered about
<mario> guess the VP doesn't expect we'll have any clients anytime soon :|
#642
<Techbert> I'm an idiot, it's your fault for confusing me. :P
#50293
<Geeno> Philosophy teacher exists because Professional Bong Smoker doesnt
Comment: #offtopic
#25625
* Xian just heard a loud bang out side
<Xian> OMG
<Xian> THe pizza boy hit our car!
<Valv|tuba> WHAT?
<Boko> Is the pizza okay!?!?
#34477
<umopepisdn> About a month ago one of my tires popped.
<umopepisdn> I ended up cutting about half of the tire off of the rim with a pair of scissors because I didn't know what to do.
<umopepisdn> Then I realized that the spare tire has got a rim on it.
Comment: Ah yes... nerds and cars =)
#917
e l i t e m r p: afk, working on my invention
n e r d b 5: invention.....uhm, whats it do?
e l i t e m r p: converts piss into drinking water
e l i t e m r p: so far, still tastes yucky
#17323
<[Banned-H]G-Daddy> oh geez, oh geez... my roomate was doing a mission in GTA3 (the one where you pick up the limo and all the mafia guys), well anyways, all the fish trucks are hitting him and blocking him in. finally he gets by but not before he catches fire and blows up.. he then punches his monitor, that's when i leave. i hear a keyboard getting slapped something hitting a wall and stuff falling off his desk.. all to the words of "FUCK YOU, FUCK THIS, GOD DAMNIT! FUCK FUCK FUCK SHIT!!!" oh jesus, he was sincere too.. it's like that vid where the guy threw his monitor down the stair well
#42848
<Workdae> i have the most hilarious issue i just picked up
<Workdae> and i can say it without compromising details, and it'd still be hilarious
<Workdae> i'm not sure where this customer got this command, or who told him it'd update his server...but he ran this command thinking it'd update his server:
<Workdae> dd if=/dev/random of=/dev/hda bs=1M
<Workdae> (if you value your data and you run linux, don't test it to find out what it does)
<Workdae> anyway, he put in the ticket that the server had been updating for a while, and that now he can't connect to it
#306334
<Chaos341> oh my god
<Chaos341> In the 3DS remake of Metal Gear Solid Snake Eater
<Chaos341> You are able to use the 3DS's built in camera to take a picture and make that picture into camouflage pattern
<Chaos341> So many dick patterns will be made
#3060
<J0RD4N> where do they find these retards?
<reptile_> randomly picked from dalnet
#28693
<kisama2> what's up with friendster
<kisama2> why am i getting messages
<kisama2> i thought my profile clearly states that i hate people
#376
*** ^o_0^ sets mode: +o ^0_o^
#2724
<JDigital> Say, how long would 600Mb take to download on a 1.5Mb connection? Lets assume I were to download an entire CD from Pyoko.org.
<Zaratustra> DO I LOOK LIKE GETRIGHT TO YOU MOTHERFUCKER
#17172
* C|3avag3 has quit IRC (Quit: Wh0 Am |? U sure u wanna know? If somebody told u i was just your average ordinary guy, not a care in the world, somebody lied! This is my gift! It is my curse! Who am |? |'m Spider-Man!!!)
<Seaker> And lamest quit message of the day goes to C|3avag3
* Att|tude^ has quit IRC (Quit: I can't go on, I know not what to do, My heart is worn, I feel as If I'm through, Please believe in me. 'Cause what I need is for you.... To believe in me.)
<Seaker> Woah, tough competition today ... I think today we'll have to call it a draw.
* Love-snack has quit IRC (Quit: Quit playing games with my heart cause baby you're breaking my heart , I LOVE YOU FOREVER XXX)
<Seaker> *DING DING* WE HAVE A WINNER!!
#11552
<happy> dude, when will i be able to buy a big gigantic fibre line for like $10/mo?
<jre> You can make one for free if you eat a lot of bran.
#222363
(JadeFrog) chainmail thongs don't look very comfy
(Scrubber) you say that now, but you won't mind when it saves your asscrack from a morning star
(JadeFrog) fair enough
#40757
<FlatEric> I'm bored
<FlatEric> where's my alcohol?
<nougatmachine> you could help me clean up dishes
<nougatmachine> that would give you something to do
<nougatmachine> I have a feeling that in the choice between booze and dishes, booze will win
* FlatEric looks to see how many dishes are in the sink
<FlatEric> yes
Comment: #macobserver, irc.hashmark.net
#15926
<@harb> Hah. So the only food I've got is a fortune cookie, and the fortune reads "May you have a good appetite." Bastards.
#1125
<`Tag> you have a lot of anger from efnet in you
<`Tag> and it shows
#55107
<Botje> i'm waiting for vim's omnicompletion to become intelligent
<decay> omnicompletion?
<decay> what does it do?
<decay> complete on all available sources? :)
<infi> you type in #!/usr/bin/perl -w, hit TAB, and it writes your program for you
<Botje> infi: that's for vim7.43
<infi> these newfangled neural DWIM interfaces kick ass
<decay> only question left: my editor wrote the wrong program for me, what can i do?
<integral> press tab again to begin cycling through the programs
#28489
<The_FOO> Zocor's is pretty funny
<The_FOO> #47717 +(17)- [X]
<The_FOO> < zocor> anyone wanna watch a guy jerk off on cam
<The_FOO> < zocor> oh shit... wrong channel :/
<The_FOO> < zocor> IGNORE THAT PLEASE'
zocor [ptwd462m@staffanstorp-187-76.skbbip.com] has joined #errorfm
<zocor> carry on
SignOff zocor: #ErrorFM (Quit: Leaving)
<The_FOO> whoa
<callahan> you said his name three times
<AxEmpire> close call there
<callahan> he heard you
<The_FOO> hehe
#56852
Ducky: So here I am, on Google earth, spying on my ex, when she calls.
Ducky: and I’m all freaking out, because I’m thinking that she knows I’m spying on her.
Leila: Dude, you know that Google earth isn’t live right?
Ducky: Shit. Now she thinks I’m stupid and an asshole!
Leila: You TOLD her that you were spying on her?
Ducky: Um… yeah.
Leila: wow, you are stupid.
#7913
<norsende> º dj aligator project - Water In The Ocean º
<roskkouro> water in the ocean. what a stupid, obvious fucking sentance!
<roskkouro> IF THERE WERE NO WATER IN THE OCEAN! THERE WOULD'NT BE NO
OCEAN! EINSTEIN!
<quoz|beer> roskkouro: hey, he's iranian
<quoz|beer> roskkouro: besides, on triton you have oceans of methane
<roskkouro> quoz: bitch