Random | Latest | Best | Full Site
#30515
<@chort> but can you trust those crazy dutch?
<@chort> i mean, WOODEN SHOES!
<@phessler> well, they did bring us the word SABOTAGE
<@phessler> and if it's good enough for the Beastie Boys, its good enough for me
#31642
<Rjx> I had this thought for a t-shirt design that I want to work on
<Rjx> it's the hindu god with all the arms
<Rjx> and he's typing at like 7 keyboards
<kitchen> playing eq?
<Rjx> ?
<kitchen> imagine having 7 arms
<kitchen> and playing eq on all of those
<kitchen> you'd be like.. uber raid force
<kitchen> one person
<maff> you'd also have a date for every night of the week
Comment: #geekissues
#32747
<n3wt> Anyone have any scissors?
<n3wt> Oh, you're all on the internet aren't you, nm
Comment: #awars-bench
#62638
<@mr_white> i think my friend has ADD
<@mr_white> turn up at his house today
<@mr_white> he answers teh door with the left side of his face clean shaved
<@mr_white> and the right side has a beard
<@mr_white> and the chin is just stubble
<@mr_white> turns out he was shaving
<@mr_white> and mid-shave he needs a piss
<@mr_white> so he takes a leak then leaves
<@mr_white> forgets to finish the shave
<t0ks> rofl
<@mr_white> that's not the best part
<@mr_white> when i turned up it was 5pm
<@mr_white> he'd shaved at 11am
<@mr_white> and he'd been out to town etc during this 6 hour gap
#54228
<Mizerock> lucas, judging by your IP...you live in new zealand?
<nforbes> ...
<nforbes> The Netherlands
<nforbes> .nz is New Zealand
<lucas> Mizerock, judging by your latest statement, you live in the USA?
Comment: irc.vaccus.org #main
#33302
<Fufie> bbl, will serve 90 days in jail for hitting a policeman six times with an ordinary broom
#17984
<RuTaLiA> i *know* im a receptionist, but it would make my job a lot easier if ppl wouldnt call up here
#32893
<+RageAgainsttheAmish> this incence im burning owns
<@Aunt_Jemima> that reminds me of a story
<@Aunt_Jemima> i was at my friends house
<@Aunt_Jemima> and he is a complete stoner
<@Aunt_Jemima> but his dad is a born again christian
<@Aunt_Jemima> and he was burning incense
<@Aunt_Jemima> his dad walks in the door and says in a southern accent
<@Aunt_Jemima> "son, i dont want you burning that incense. its the gateway to drugs"
#6472
<[werk]chin> (Bobo) "With the sam's deal on a 100 gb drive, im able to download and store the porn of 10 regular men"
#7023
<Ac3d> think i should archive my pr0n acording to type (movie,picture,interactive,etc...), alphabetical (a-f,g-m,etc..), size, or genre?
#21828
<ash|revising> logs are for beavers
#14456
<cix> they're outside aren't they?
<s> what is "outside"?
<cix> it's that place they show on "Discover"
<cix> I think it's near Montana.
#32744
<@tadashi-> i remember everytime chinese new year rolled on by
<@tadashi-> the teacher would make us do a parade through the school
<@tadashi-> and i'd fucking lead it cuz i was the only azn in my class
<@tadashi-> i was like wtf
#37283
<Jester{work}> butt sex is like spinach , if you're forced to eat it when you're a kid you wont like it as an adult.
#3852
<Hendrix> Its fun to go out in the cold weather and watch smokers pass out becuse they dont know when they're done exhaling
#38627
<Chaos> omg i was about to kill myself but this rom saved me
<Yutz> Heh
<Yutz> When there are suicidal people in any chat, I'm a dude that's telling them to go for it
<Yutz> Because I'm a bastard
<Chaos> Yutz: Because you're the one rational enough to know they won't do it.
<Chaos> And then if they did, it'd kinda be funny when their head slumps onto the keyboard and they just keep typing "hhhhhhhhhhhhhh" for an hour
#1905
<Fustard> oh good god
<Fustard> i was just thinking of something to myself
<Fustard> and out loud i said
<Fustard> 'laugh out loud'
<Fustard> instead of actually laughing.
#3728
<Slant> I lost $50 to sexual laws in Washington.
<Corranfox> if I have to pay $50 to fuck my girlfriend so be it
#118537
<Incandenza> tracklisting of this album sounds awesome
<Incandenza> 1. "It's Complicated Being a Wizard" 23:00
<Incandenza> 2. "Opal Magic" - 0:50
<Incandenza> 3. "Ruby Magic" - 4:04
<Incandenza> 4. "Sapphire Magic" - 2:19
<Incandenza> 5. "Amethyst Magic" - 2:18
<Incandenza> 6. "Emerald Magic" - 2:31
<Incandenza> 7. "Amber Magic" - 3:25
<Incandenza> 8. "Gold Magic" - 2:27
<Incandenza> 9. "Crystal Magic" - 1:27
<Incandenza> 10. "Black Magic" - 3:37
#15837
<cochese04> Next time I'm at the pet store, I'm gonna take a hampster and drop it in the scorpion cage.
<cochese04> I wanna see what a hampster's face looks like when it goes, "oh, fuck."
#49282
<TrogL> Found a new use for a chainsaw. Daughter's boyfriend wouldn't wake up. Ran the chainsaw outside his window. He bolted out of bed yelling "I didn't do it! I didn't do it!" He was still twitching three hours later
<Phoon> ROFLMAO
<Phoon> that's why nothing will beat a 12 gauge shotgun for home defense
<Phoon> Even a cat burglar with ice water in his veins will shit himself at the sound of a 12-gauge being pumped
<Phoon> you don't even need to fire it
<Phoon> hell, you don't even need the gun... just the cocking mechanism and a bottle of carpet cleaner to get rid of the shit stain
#4786
<malkav> 96 kbps is cd quality
<sic> you must have cd's from mexico or something :[[
#58208
<Corwinoid> BTW Brain, no I haven't
<WifiBrain> no you havent what?
<Corwinoid> I'm replying to the last thing you said to me
<Corwinoid> a week or so ago
<WifiBrain> i dont remember it
<Corwinoid> That I'd lost my title as the master of delayed response :P
#53028
<fr_gment> better !pout !cry
<fr_gment> better watchout
<fr_gment> lpr why
<fr_gment> santa claus <north pole >town
<fr_gment> cat /etc/passwd >list
<fr_gment> ncheck list
<fr_gment> ncheck list
<fr_gment> cat list | grep naughty >nogiftlist
<fr_gment> cat list | grep nice >giftlist
<fr_gment> santa claus <north pole > town
<fr_gment> who | grep sleeping
<fr_gment> who | grep awake
<fr_gment> who | egrep 'bad|good'
<fr_gment> for (goodness sake) {
<fr_gment> be good
<fr_gment> }
#7486
<hopi> let's talk about my need for once
<hopi> er wrong window