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#34352
<Josh> yeah, I had to go to church tonight :/
<Josh> They need to check the date on that Jesus; his Body is stale.
#13664
<Mack_Salmon> do you ever listen to Meat Loaf?
<Flirbnic> No.
<Mack_Salmon> he's food....
<Mack_Salmon> er!
<Mack_Salmon> he's good
<Mack_Salmon> whoops
#54993
< DMM> that reminds me of my favourite sorting algorithm
< DMM> rearrange the objects randomly using a quantum random number generator, then test to see if they are sorted. If not, destroy the universe.
< DMM> in linear time you will produce an ensemble of universes in which the objects are sorted
< zem> ooh
< zem> truly a universal sorting algorithm
#440
<blazemore> we know your hand gets more action jax0ring than your feet do walking
<scar`1> yeah well that's also caused by the fact that i hardly walk
#218044
<sward> “I found a box I can reproduce on”
* sward worries
#886
<osx> I programmed my sidewinder for IRC combat.
<osx> A for Awp, B for Ban, and C for Kick.
<osx> So watch out..
#54059
<mmap> i have a mormon friend that i corrupted, he'll drink a beer with me now :P
<_Arthur> Hey, I'm a Catholic (lapsed)
<Feldegast> _Arthur so do u or do u not belive in little rubber things?
<mmap> pencil erasers?
#8311
* Anderlan raises a cheek off the chair
<Anderlan> farting is offensive, but raising a cheek in preparation is even more so
<gears> it's a good way to show people "I am not interested in what you have to say. Leave my cubicle at your soonest convenience."
#22529
<Capt_Dequranii> bah... the south were n00bs
<Capt_Dequranii> the north had the better aimbot
<crack> "omg!@! h4x h4x!~!!" Robert E. Lee
#5923
[mad] WHAT KINDA PRESIDENT DO WE GOT ANYWAYZ
[mad] HE SMOKES WEED AND DONT INHALE
[mad] GETS A BLOW JOB AND DONT CUM
[mad] I MEAN CMON.
#305505
* Now talking on #shakesoda
<Karai> I need to stop having very sexual dreams about my sister.
<LHoT10820> ...
<LHoT10820> What an awesome thing to walk in on.
<LHoT10820> Tell me more, Karai.
<Karai> rofl
<Karai> I had a dream last night
<Karai> that I found a new way to make music
<Karai> by using a glass soda bottle stuffed in her whowho to control airflow or some shit
<Karai> it was WEIRD AS FUCK
<Karai> I seriously woke up with the :| face
Comment: #shakesoda on Freenode
#42636
<@FunkyFender> Why couldn't there be a character set that included all the symbols of all the different languages
<@Zero> What would you call it, though?
<@Zero> "Unicode" sounds catchy, for some reason.
Comment: 404 DC Hub
#33624
<eslice> i just got a vm from some random hick asking for doug
<eslice> wanted to know if i could do research on signature control for ground and air vehicles
<eslice> wtf?
<eslice> should i call back and act like i know wtf i'm talking about
<jestuh> lol only if you record it
<eslice> yeah i was just thinking about that
<hy\dro> yes
<hy\dro> that's what i did last week when some woman called me thinking i was her court-appointed lawyer in some contempt case against her ex-husband
<eslice> hahaha
<eslice> did you show up in court
<hy\dro> haha no i didn't show up, she eventually figured out what was going on
<hy\dro> i told her that i could just have her ex killed for her and nobody would have to know
<hy\dro> and she kind of stuttered
<hy\dro> then hung up
Comment: #GeekIssues
#28315
<Dru> been going strong for like 20 minutes
<Velcro_> the viagra's helping eh?
<Dru> yeah like i need drugs to keep a constant hard on
<Quorthy> viagra is for ppl without usenet access
<Quorthy> & usenet is for ppl without vagina access
#32106
<tinglanchio> kthx
<tlozoot> ok frmo now on don't respond with just "word" or "kthx" beacuse I have to read this stuff
<tlozoot> and when you respond the background goes black and I can't read it
<tlozoot> k????//
<tinglanchio> okay
<tlozoot> very funny asshole.
<tinglanchio> word
#8504
<dr_rotcod> my poo was white again. this cannot go on
#1595
<k-rad-bob> i think we need to like develop a bit further as persons
<Prae_> just as i thought
<k-rad-bob> i cant imagine what life would be like with no arms at all
<k-rad-bob> irc'ing with a spoon in your mouth
<Prae_> LOL
<k-rad-bob> no masturbating
<k-rad-bob> spending life on a quest for weird chicks who'd pittyfuck you
<k-rad-bob> or like team up with a legless chick
<k-rad-bob> imagine the sex
#6918
<aer> I don't like pamela anderson type breasts
<xf> Their remote controls are annoying and not well documented.
#11032
<jablowme> why do some people associate nerds with small cocks?
<Jonny-TD> so girls wont like nerds.....duh
<jablowme> those fucking fags.
#427
<VicViper> My last girlfriend was cute, but then I found out she was a rom, so I had to dump her.
#4306
(^[QuRvE]^) its freezing in my class
(xyst) qurve is freezing his ass?
(bc) qurve is freaking in my ass
(nexxai) QURVE HAS A FAT ASS
(xyst) QURVE STOP TOUCHING MY ASS
(seiki) QURVE LIKES IT IN THE ASS
(^[QuRvE]^) It's nice having friends.
#34834
<gnome> I believe I convinced someone to ditch AOL, too
<gnome> while I was waiting for my mom to get out of her meeting some woman started asking me computer questions
<gnome> And then proceeded to ask me about school and if there's any sort of computer training because her daughter is interested
<gnome> She then went on to exlain that her daughter likes to IM people and things like that, and so she thought should could do something in the computer field
<gnome> My first thought on this was "I like to masturbate but that doesn't mean I could be a porn star"
#19049
<NestyPoo> man
<NestyPoo> this d00d tried to get his hat from under a rollercoaster
<NestyPoo> one of those upside down rollercoasters
<NestyPoo> he got kicked by some women in a passing rollercoaster and he lost his head
<NestyPoo> the woman broke her foot and is suing for damages
<rhythm> savage
<rhythm> did he get his hat back
<Chalupa_J> well good hats arent exactly cheap
#8362
<TTX> How do I change my name in here?...
<Naoki> type /nick yournick
*** TTX is now known as yournick
#144439
<[UTM][ri]TuttiFrutti> oooo
<[UTM][ri]TuttiFrutti> RnB means rhythm and blues?
<[89]Z> yea >_>
<[UTM][ri]TuttiFrutti> i always thought rap and black