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#301428
<DobyMick> god, inglorious bastards is such a sick movie!
<DobyMick> so what if the "good" guys are jewish and the "bad" guys are nazis, its still violence and murder!
<DobyMick> i mean, how would people feel if someone made a movie where the positions were reversed?
<Fulup>They already did. It's called a documentary.
#68951
<@semi> man
<@semi> i think i should turn my speakers down
<@zeppeh> or quit listening to nsync
<@semi> i cant tell if its gas from downing that soda or just the bass.
<@zeppeh> nsync doesn't have bass
<@semi> it has lance bass
<@semi> i mean
<@semi> fuck you.
Comment: #brained irc.catheadlabs.com. also, I wasn't listening to nsync.
#20493
<HellFyre> AIM has about the functionality of a shaved poodle on fire.
<jsi> HellFyre: At least that can enrage the French.
#4858
<Puff-working> I play the banjo..never learned fiddle..but I might someday.
<Puff-working> and I can make a harmonica sing.
<Unfor|Work> I play the CD player
#65605
<Burningmace> I had a customer in hysterics today at work
<+KPR> how come?
<Burningmace> Well, we sell lots of things that have different types, so sometimes you can buy assorted packs
<Burningmace> He was buying some flavoured condoms... assorted ones, so the computer automatically prepends "Assorted" to the start of it
<Burningmace> So I put it through and hand him the reciept and he checks it and starts laughing
<+KPR> huh?
<Burningmace> I took a look at the reciept, and because the line didn't fit on the paper, it'd truncated the first word.
<Burningmace> So he'd bought some Ass Flavoured Condoms.
Comment: It's a laugh a minute at Lidl
#303208
<GauHelldragon> G-Flex
<GauHelldragon> how many cubic milliliters can you fit in a bathtub
<G-Flex> what is a cubic milliliter
<G-Flex> you're going to have to ask me in units that aren't hyperdimensional
#14583
*** mad-splat (~mad-splat@2-170.borcpe.cableone.net) has joined #programming
<mad-splat> @find *turbo*c++*
<mad-splat> @find *codewarrior*
<dos622> @find you*being*banned
*** mad-splat (~mad-splat@2-170.borcpe.cableone.net) has left #programming
#1027
<Yukkel> a belch is not an oral report
#50332
<BlackDeth> flipping through the channels i stumbled on that religion channel
<BlackDeth> and the guy is saying how now with mpeg4 digital compression they can broadcast several versions of their show simultaneously
<BlackDeth> then he went on to say how its gods plan and how mpeg came to us from god to spread his word
<BlackDeth> that was the best shit ive ever seen
#264828
<HalfNote5> You guys do realize that if McCain wins, watching him try to lead the country is going to be an equivalent exercise in frustration to watching your great-grandfather trying to set the VCR clock.
#14015
<TimMm> (\_/)
<TimMm> (='.')
<TimMm> (")-(")
<rhythm> shoot it
<rhythm> shoot it now
#3868
<Wodan> hi wich langage do u spieak?
<moonsee> heh
<moonsee> apparently not yours
#7792
<veroniq> i want to learn how to make cyber-sex
<Poiny> good for you veroniq
<veroniq> could someone show me how_
<veroniq> ?
<Poiny> not me
<Poiny> im celibate to cyber sex
<CK-away> yeah I boycott cybersex, it hurt me too much
#302032
<+MachineDog> ....crap, how do I do the action things?
<+Kitten> you do /me
<+MachineDog> you WISH
Comment: My first day on IRC
#8329
<a> i wish i had some vr goggles or something
<Loc-Dog> a: for porn?
<a> so nobody could tell i was playing games
<a> games being interactive porn
<Loc-Dog> a: they'd be able to tell when you pulled out the "joystick" to manuever your "character" in the "first person shooter"
<a> Loc-Dog: i use the keyboard.
#299603
<cxreg> i'm going to go in to work tomorrow, and tell them that i'm going to fix bugs homeopathically
<cxreg> by inserting a syntax error once every 700 billion lines of code
#3809
<Scofco> whenever I get a hardon
<Scofco> I pass out
<Scofco> well, I actually faint
<Scofco> because the idea of getting laid shocks me
#31917
<DrBacchus> fajita: RFC 2795
<fajita> DrBacchus: excuse me?
<DrBacchus> fajita: You're supposed to give me a link.
<fajita> DrBacchus: i'm not following you...
<DrBacchus> dumb bot
<fajita> Stupid human
#45437
<Drew> next to that one i found funny is the barcode reader at Regal (movie theater)
<Drew> it had a warning
<Drew> do not look into laser
<Drew> it had it in braille too
Comment: #cam, irc.drivemeinsane.com
#12379
<[{ug}]> hmm i really should spring clean this pooter. /usr/src is taking up 2.1Gb
<Lithium^> what have you got in there? the sources to your porn collection?
#14352
<SophiesCat> my room is making ominous popping sounds.
<malcolm> ghost popcorn
#111
<jestuh> i was trying to go the speed limit so i didn't get a ticket but a cop got me in a school zone
<DigDug> How much?
<jestuh> i'm talking about need for speed not real life
#16807
<mptBreak> hyatt, what are you doing?
<hyatt> mpt, sitting here in my underwear talking to you.
#193949
<Zachary> someone gave me an engraved rock for my birthday with ZACHERY on it
<Zachary> I mean first off you just gave me a fucking rock for my birthday
<Zachary> and then my name is on it and it's misspelled
<Zachary> of course maybe that was just the name of the rock
#17960
<Kirke> I had interests too
<Kirke> But they all ended in court