Random | Latest | Best | Full Site
#53563
<RocketGib> I heard a rumor one time about this dairy down the road
<RocketGib> a guy thought it would be fun to hook himself up to the vaccum tubes
<RocketGib> so he did, and said it was the best blow job ever
<RocketGib> unfortunately, his nuts got sucked out.
Comment: #rct3
#14485
<jodaro> hmm, my mom just invited me over for dinner
<jodaro> mm, free food
<stu> you mean your mum doesn't charge for dinner?
<jodaro> no
<stu> damn
#7485
<Chrizto> show me a chick worth worrying about after you're not the one fucking them anymore and I'll show you the value of the imaginary number i
#137186
< stiv2k> so, i have to write a term paper on a 'controversial text'... any ideas? just spit them out
<JimmyDee_> satanic verses
< stiv2k> ahah
< spb> the holy bible
< stiv2k> that would be surely interesting
< fred> Novell's agreement with microsoft ¬_¬
Comment: #defocus on freenode
#8875
<GoodScrat> my gf is twice your age
<db-x> goodscrat, twice is about the time i get her in a week
<GoodScrat> to do what, change your diaper?
#311085
<kerio> i'm looking for a client that can use ecdsa account keys
<kerio> can be very barebones, in fact i'd prefer it
<kerio> initially i wanted to use gethttpsforfree but it doesn't support ecdsa account keys :|
<hl> kerio: My client supports ECDSA keys
<kerio> does your client do CSRs
<kerio> i'm all for the CSRs
<hl> no. Why do you need CSRs?
<kerio> because i measure my self-worth by how many openssl subcommands i can use in a row without having to check the documentation
#65846
<Digital> Tampons are lame.
<Sephiroth> it's the string that's a little bizarre
<Digital> Why is the string bizarre ?
<Sephiroth> I half expect that if I pull on it, my girlfriend will wind up and say something
#65016
<DogTheBootyHunter> dammitdammitdammitdammitdammitsonofabitch
<DogTheBootyHunter> I just missed the season finales of two of my shows...
<DogTheBootyHunter> lost track of time
<muttonduck> i watched northern exposure religiously, never missed an episode, even when joel left the series. i was watching the FINAL episode with five mins to go when my 3 yr old daughter fellover in the hallway and banged her head. By the time I got back to the TV the show was finished.
<muttonduck> Now my son is my favourite child.
#19074
<Stalker> Up what?
<Push> Up the rabbit hole?
<Stalker> DOWN! DOWN the rabbit hole!
#33216
<chiDEEZE> go fuck yourself
<mindstorms> itd be cool if there was somoene named "yourself"
<mindstorms> and he was like constantly being raped
#73512
Retro: I have discovered how life works.
Retro: "Men: No shirt, no service"
Retro: "Women: No shirt, free drinks!"
#29673
<@Confessor> I remember one time in boot camp.
<@Confessor> When I tried to ask the RDC for a head call... 'bathroom break.'
<@Confessor> I forgot the 'call' part.
<@Confessor> I ended up respectfully requesting head.
<@Confessor> From my drill instructor.
<@Confessor> And thus ended any hope of a political career.
#10859
<BigTongue> man, look at this slut on the price is right... bob barker is having a viagra attack
#8339
<Hitokoei> Last year, I was at my friends and we were playing truth or dare in Boys vs. Girls style, and the girls dared all of us to jack of right there in front of them.
<Hitokoei> And even worse than that, we did it...
<Hitokoei> For $30 each.
<Hitokoei> I got made fun of though...they said I jacked off funny.
#14513
<Stay99>but anyway, back to me. I want to be the ruler of the world. Sometimes-I play ruler of the world in my basement when noone else is home
#41494
(momossa) cubed: i want to let it go in her
(Cubed) then shes pregnant
(momossa) waht??
(eLe) Cuming in a girl -> pregnancy
(momossa) m.... let me google that
#15970
*** Now talking in #clubsi.com
*** Topic is 'I hate Linux because it makes me type "man mount"'
*** Set by Arctil on Wed Jul 10 16:27:12
#10911
<Xaotika> if i ever start a band, remind me to call it MY ASS.
<Xaotika> then you could all come watch MY ASS if we ever perform on stage.
<Xaotika> MY ASS will rock your world. i'm sure.
#309037
<worf> goddamn how i hate DB2 ....
<worf> "LIMIT 2000" ... nope, too easy ... "FETCH FIRST 2000 ROWS ONLY"
#7291
<Iced> the IDE cable from the COM2 to the port is fsked
<Iced> it must be that
<NepCHooN> ide cable?
<NepCHooN> your com2 hooks into your hard drive?
<NepCHooN> i ph33r your pc!!
#311479
<CapnBeeb> cripes
<CapnBeeb> my dad is asking how to disable an adblocker
<CapnBeeb> on a fucking XP machine
<CapnBeeb> YOU DON'T
<CapnBeeb> EVER
#295402
<incesticide> fine, you can have ops
<incesticide> but first you must answer this skill testing question
<incesticide> you are in a race, and overtake the person in second place
<incesticide> what is 2+2?
<cj> SECOND, BITCH!
<cj> oh fuck
#25506
<AtrocityX> is there a virus that can make your computer lag? heh
<DeskLazer> it's called AOL
#2931
<profuse> its rather good, this is the first of anything of his that ive listened to
<profuse> heh im talkinglike im british or some shit
<al-x> hey
<al-x> americans say "rather" too
<al-x> except they say "i'd rather have a big slow car that's flashy than a car that isn't flashy but runs better"
#820
<TwiLyght> Toby on @#gayphonesex @#gaydads4sons @#gayteensex @#gayboysex @#gayteenboys
<TwiLyght> ack!
<TwiLyght> you dirtied my computer with /whois toby