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#37341
<Zao> It's typo evening tonight, everyone is invited.
<rpop> htank you
#31338
<d4n> i want more biscuits
<d4n> no i dont!
<d4n> yes i do!
<d4n> no i dont!
<ror> !?!?!?
<d4n> !!!
<d4n> interior monologue wibble
#67405
<Phroziac> lol, my dad thought kelly clarkson was country
<HellDragon> lol
<HellDragon> wow
<TheBiggestGnome> wow?
<HellDragon> oops, i misreaded " my dad thought kelly clarkson was A country"
<Phroziac> LOL
<ajnewbold> "Today President Bush met with the leader of Kelly Clarkson for another round of missile talks."
#3299
<Walls> me and another guy may be going out
#28708
<Fox> monty
<Monty> ibot?
<iBot> Monty?
<Monty> lol
* iBot laughs out loud
Comment: Monty and iBot are bots
#118151
(+ware) I rear-ended a car this morning. So there we are alongside the road and
(+ware) slowly the driver gets out of the car . . . and you know how you just get sooo
(+ware) stressed and life seems to get funny?
(+ware) Well, I could NOT believe it . . he was a DWARF! He storms over to my car,
(+ware) looks up at me and says, "I AM NOT HAPPY!"
(+ware) So, I look down at him and say, "Well, which one are you then?"... and
(+ware) THAT'S when the fight started . .
#297051
Andrew to Ryan: Go Home?
Ryan: Yes
Andrew: What does that mean?
Ryan: It's the place with the other computer.
Comment: Overheard two co-workers
#65178
<dsfargeg> right, I don't even know how to start this calculus question :(
<cjr> I've got a phd on mathematics
<dsfargeg> really?? what do you do now?
<cjr> ?
<cjr> ohhh, i meant a .pdf
<dsfargeg> fuck you
#301599
Jingleboy: Love how the Business version of Vista has "have fun on your PC" unticked
#6876
<Spectra> hrm. Optus are going to start charging me >= $10 more per month, because "we listened to feedback from our customers".
<Spectra> I'm fascinated which customers said "we want to pay more for your service".
#300771
[Marcus] : So I'm filling out an injury report for one of our stunt men...
[Greta] : Oh no what happened?
[Marcus] : He busted his nose in a stunt no big deal it happens. But the answers for the questions on the forms...
[Marcus] : How did the employee injure himself: his head was getting pushed into a toilet.
[Marcus] : Would this be a common work place injury: yes
[Marcus] : Statement made by employee: it's ok john, next week I get to hit you with a car
#67456
<Shaezerus> Sep 21, 2006 Play-Asia.com Order #------- received.
<Shaezerus> Jan 01, 1970 Play-Asia.com Order #------- shipped!
<Shaezerus> Fucking timetraveling import stores.
<Koushiro> And it *still* hasn't arrived!
#14761
<deltax> your not to smart
<SofaKing> too smart
<SofaKing> your not that bright yourself
#327
<persia> my favorite country song is "i fucked my horse on a sunday morning"
<migg> my fave country song is "Its midnight in montana, and i cant get my dick out of this cow"
*** You were kicked by sandk1ng (i like the song "i kicked my friend for makin fun of music i listen to")
#294654
<U235> it always bothers me when i'm filling my bottle of water and the pressure drops because someone flushed a toilet
<U235> in the back of my mind, I just can't stop thinking that that water I was about to drink instead washed someone's poop away.
#24096
<whitcomb> hm.
<whitcomb> there were 2 afk's on the other team on the iceworld (cs) server i was just playing on... and maybe 10 people total
<whitcomb> so, after the rest of their team was dead, and I was the only person alive, i spelled out "i am gay" and drew a happy face on the wall with an ak.
<whitcomb> and the next round, I wrote "deja vu".
<whitcomb> but i was getting bored so on the third round I only wrote "sigh."
<whitcomb> it took maybe 3 minutes to write each one
#38415
<snottyboy> Mary's father has five daughters:
<snottyboy> 1. Nanna,
<snottyboy> 2. Nenne,
<snottyboy> 3. Ninni,
<snottyboy> 4. Nonno.
<snottyboy> 5. ??????
<snottyboy> What is the name of the fifth daughter?
<Dragon> Nunnu
<snottyboy> Nunnu? NO! Of course not. Her name was Mary
<snottyboy> read up
<snottyboy> :P~
#299780
< fawkesmulder> the only thing impenetrable to hackers are vaginas
#15710
<Stemish> "How many NOC staff does it take it screw in a light bulb?"
<PetrDoubt> 500 to send the outage notices to nocstaff, 14 managers to
escalate it to client services and back, and one to change it.
#6070
<psychicbug> ok, take the bible in a .txt document and open it in notepad. shift every first letter to the right 1, and save it as an .avi. turns out, its a cumshot vid
#47456
< teferi> I lost the office pool
< teferi> damn
<+res0> aww, no more swimming at work
#33231
<+milkman`bot> 9. Animal Trivia: The hummingbird is the only bird that can ---------
<@Merlord> fly
<+Yoink> fly
#45321
(%theProject) i have the urge to smack someone in the head right now
(%theProject) some guy was telling me he just noticed that chopin's sonata no. 2 in b-flat minor, the funeral march, sounds remarkably like the imperial march from star wars
(%theProject) well, yes, because that piece was the inspiration for john williams writing the imperial.
(17:28:03) (%theProject) the guy proceeded to shout "OMG CHOPIN RIPPED OFF STAR WARS"
(17:28:14) (%theProject) even though chopin died in EIGHTEEN-FORTY-SEVEN
Comment: #mess.be on irc.trueirc.net
#17364
<+meb> after ten minutes of trying to get him off
<+meb> it did it automaticly..
<+meb> yay
#14638
<Noctornus-> you know what they say about a guy with small hands......
<+Anton> "He doesn't have big hands"?