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#3373
<Wes> While most dudes go day-to-day waiting for sex to happen, the sex offenders go out and MAKE it happen.
#68635
<mojosmackwit> sorry
<mojosmackwit> i have a personality disorder
<clifgriffin> I didn't know "asshole" was considered a personality disorder.
#8612
<zealot_> gopher is the protocol of the future
#303704
<@michael`> Kim Kardashian, Ellen DeGeneres Praise Overturning of Prop. 8?
<@michael`> thank GOD she spoke out
<@michael`> i was sitting here thinking
<@michael`> jesus christ, WHAT does kim kardashian think about this
#54148
<Mivalekan> why are most girls so insecure about their weight
<Produkt> becuase theyre fat
<finn> because they are fat
#43688
<RedBeard> should i buy an xbox vga adapter for $75?
<RedBeard> i think i shall buy one.
<Syntacs> You could your TV.
<Hippo> He *could* his TV, Syntacs! That's right!
* Hippo pats Syntacs.
<Syntacs> I don't have time for verbs Hippo. I'm a man of action. I realize this may seem contradictory at first.
#92899
<Athnex> they're the people who if they had space ships, would make crop circles on other planets
#52306
<Sef> We were cleaning out my friend's storage space today because his parents paid us 25 bucks each. :o
<Sef> And we found some interesting things.
<rstlne> oh?
<Sef> A vibrator. Some weird gloves. And a book. "The New Joy of Sex"
<Sef> We stuck the vibrator in the dishwasher that was there.
<Sef> Then we went back to his house and found out his parents are going to give the dishwasher to his grandmother.
<Sef> So..
<Sef> Either way, someone's going to open up the dishwasher and get a surprise.
<Sef> Big orange floppy penis.
#297733
<~Chokehold> man
<~Chokehold> I love this torrent site sometimes
<~Chokehold> it just helped me prank this douche
<~ZeraDaMan> lol
<~Chokehold> some guy has been asking for this norwegian movie on DC++ all fucking day
<~Chokehold> so I'm like "fine, I'll help you look"
<~Chokehold> I found the nfo for the specific release he wanted
<~Chokehold> ..then I downloaded Big.Big.Babes.30.XXX.DVDRip.XVID-DFA
<~Chokehold> and renamed it a little bit
<~Chokehold> ...and tinkered with the nfo and sfv file
<~Chokehold> and remove sample :3
--- 11 minutes later ---
<~Chokehold> oh, the guy's back online
<~Chokehold> most likely he figured out what I did there
#31749
<Rjx> what the shit
<Rjx> http://www.ukgeek.co.uk/
<Rjx> I spent 3 minutes trying to move that window
<Rjx> before I realised a) it was an image
<Rjx> and b) I wasn't even in linux
#310194
<madk> The interpreter uses an unbounded tape size, but due to technical limitations will stop being unbounded if the tape size reaches 2^63 cells.
#39087
<^Sasquatch^> AFK = Away From Komputer
#723
<thom> CTCP VERSION: DICKS 2.0 OS, 69 K OF FREE ASS SPACE
<cstone> ALLOCATING PRICKS
<rbw> AHLGUAHGLUHALGUHAGUHAGLUHAG I SEEM TO BE HAVING A BUFFER OVERFLOW PROBLEM HERE PEOPLE
#29707
<danamania> http://www.tdcj.state.tx.us/stat/finalmeals.htm is a list of peoples last meal requests in texas
<danamania> before execution.
<danamania> lots of cheeseburgers there
<Hamster> oh thats really sad
<Hamster> it looks like criminals drink coke. pepsi marketing needs to get hold of this
#25155
<Dingles> Why am I such a funny person?
<Jack104> 'Cause your life is a joke?
#49409
--> stoichic joined #ampedout
* stoichic was promoted to operator by KOMPRECHU
* stoichic was promoted to operator by Eigenstat
* stoichic was promoted to operator by workstan
<workstan> it's like an ops-positive gangbang in here, man.
<workstan> and i got thirds :^(
Comment: efnet #ampedout
#7143
<DanSTC> Delusion, will you have my baby?
<Delusion> Dan: Yes, if it's cooked well.
#56603
<evilAdmin> I feel like a dolt
<evilAdmin> sitting in a meeting with da b0ss
<evilAdmin> I screwed up a IT expendature report... Put down Win 2003 Enterprise when we needed standard just from downloadin' it off BT as a habbit. It stuck another $3000 on the report by accident.
<evilAdmin> B0ss asked me about it. My first reaction, I kid you not, was this little hand-twitch thing that would have otherwise been CTRL-Z.
<evilAdmin> The b0ss caught it. He said "Did you just press Undo?", and I said "Yeah, now I need to enter the infinite money cheat". He just stared at me.
<evilAdmin> Then him and his 4 goons all started laughing at me :(. My job sux
#4130
<djazonic> tiko: do you know how to setup a win2k's telnet server?
<JediPimp> djazonic: format c:\ ; <insert linux CD>
#37289
(Eagle): I just watched a cock fight
(Deranged): You and your boyfriend at it again?
#311302
<dn5> I have int start = 1476620495; and int end = 1476620495 (unix timestamp), but if I have int res; and then res = end - start, res returns 0 when printf with %d
<dn5> why?
<izalove> because it's the same number?
<fstd> duh
<dn5> okay thats not supposed to happen haha
<fstd> ,reset
<candide> Days since our last accident: 0
Comment: ##c at freenode
#30770
(@Clitos) hungry for weiners?
(@tyree) fuck i could take a hot dog or two
(@Clitos) in the ass?
(@tyree) no
(@tyree) i like to swallow
#34247
<cyberdyne> This gook asshole pulled out and blocked our lane, so we went around him and lost control and ended up in the trees
<cyberdyne> car is toast
<cyberdyne> my shoulder and ribs are cracked
<cyberdyne> his pelvis may be cracked
<cyberdyne> ALL MY GODDAMN DIVX CD'S WERE IN THE CAR TOO
#29880
<timovgod> I was in a rape awarness class once, well... my picture was.
#40805
<L0ne_W0lf[A]> but I mean, 1% opf 100 is 10 though, right?
<Liero> ....
<Liero> no....