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#5426
<Alcaron> You should set yourself up a webcam. I don't know why, but I get this feeling we'll catch you doing something stupid. :)
<Longi> Alcaron: thats exactly the reason i wont set one up, the high probablity of me doing someone extremely embarassing
<Longi> err?
<Longi> THING
<Longi> someTHING!
#310171
<kmc> I like telling people who've only used high level languages about the bizarre forms of undefined behavior in C, and then ending it with "this language and its relatives are used for most systems in planes, cars, medical devices, nuclear reactors, etc."
#3944
(seiki) &google inflatable+goat
(fnet) Google (inflatable+goat): http://www.vacationbibleschool.com/v_newfeatures.html
#7344
<[werk]chin> i think its wrong for elderly people to be openly sexual at all
<[werk]chin> they need to be these asexual funnels of christmas money and bad driving
#25168
<CrackZ> I'm gonna be getting a new boss soon too
<CrackZ> its a power hungry female
<CrackZ> ya know the type
<CrackZ> her 'can do' profile is going to clash with my 'can't be arsed' profile
#19054
in #teen
[itstomEK] 20-m-melb.pix msg me for a chat 8)
[DiZ] 20 omg , ure ot a a teren
[DiZ] banz0r him
[Jon-] i would, but i'm still trying to decipher what you just said
#1995
<Digested> nothing like coming back to irc after a night of partying
<Digested> and nothing like partying on a monday night and then driving home at the same time as everyone is driving to work
<Digested> and laughing at them
<Digested> :D
<MadHatter> Not everyone can live with their parents
<Digested> that's why i'm taking advantage of the situation while i still can
<Digested> the main problem with sharing a house with parents is bringing a girl home
<Digested> but it isn't really a problem for me... heh
<MadHatter> hehe
#9253
centenarygirl: maybe someday, but not right now
RKM 82: "maybe someday" do you mean that, or is that just thrown in there to comfort me
centenarygirl: no.........I really mean it
<PizzaMind> maybe means "when I'm 30, my pussy is floopy, no one else wants me and I've finally grown out of liking assholes"
#311396
<graspee> fucking ipod shuffled onto guided meditation track and i fell asleep at the keyboard
#38925
<cab86|away> aparently most americans seem to think races go are: caucasian, african-american, hispanic, asian, native-americans.
<Mech> yes
<cab86|away> wich i think it's a complete idioticy
<Ptolemy> And don't forget Nascar.
<Ptolemy> That's a race.
#24177
<Faight> Reproduction is stupid.
<AndrewLB> You want sex, don't you?
<Faight> I have a 6 year old brother.
<Faight> He's an annoying little bastard, but I love him.
<Faight> =/
<AndrewLB> That was quite possibly THE most disturbing answer you could give.
#28694
<EvilSpork> nah
<EvilSpork> the drug wars are all long gone
<EvilSpork> that shit stopped back in the 80s
<triple6> yeah, the drugs won. :)
Comment: EvilSpork lives in Miami
#2037
<timh> okay, kraken- you don't need to know a person before you talk to them. otherwise there would be severe bootstrapping issues with human interaction
#1101
[Guilty] Jean-Claude Van Damme made a movie named "Replicant" in 2001?
[Guilty] When did that come out
(McMoo) 2001
#2203
<kritical> the doctor made me piss in a cup and i had wacked off like an hour earlier...he then walks in and tells me i need to cut back a bit on masturbating..im like, "WTF"
#30442
* b0bd0g changes topic to 'THE MATRIX: BEST UNIX MOVIE EVER'
<icronirc> neo: `make all`
<icronirc> `make itwithcarrieannmoss`
<b0bd0g> killall -9 "mr. smith"
<icronirc> rm -rf /usr/local/lib/matrix
<icronirc> find / -type evil -exec rm -rf {} \;
<b0bd0g> home/mr.smith% while (1) { fork(); };
<b0bd0g> n30 iz l33t
#16766
<Grim13> Mariah Carey's cleavage got nominated for "Worst onscreen couple"
#34187
<gorF> cool, I get viruses sent to my email as well as porn now
<Genki> heh
<gorF> what more could you want
<gorF> ...apart from actual messages
<SirLuke-X> Well, one of them is good.
<MadRhetoric> Porn an virii?
<MadRhetoric> A lethal mix.
<gorF> yeah, its like an electronic prostitute
Comment: #zebeth dreamIRC
#305654
<IMMJR> Nice knew name |xjojox|
<IMMJR> Don't quite understand what the |'s are for
<|xjojox|> so the x's dont fall off
#56337
<Mal> I may have made a fatal error in my personal development.
<Wad_Shooter> What'dya mean?
<Mal> OK, so a couple of years ago I graduate, get ready to go to university.
<Mal> And I'm a nice guy and everything, but I'm a bit quiet. Shy, you know?
<Wad_Shooter> Yeah...
<Mal> So I decide to become more of a quick speaker. The kind of guy who's got a good one-liner for any situation. Pretty easy stuff - I started by using a few characters from books, sort of borrowing their mannerisms, and it eventually stuck. I started becoming more talkative, and more outwardly funny.
<Mal> Basically I was just coming out and saying the shit that was going through my head anyway.
<Mal> Problem was, at around the same time I started reading these fucking quote sites - Bash, QDB, you know.
<Wad_Shooter> OK...
<Mal> So I'm still coming out with funny stuff that's going through my head - but now it's like 99% 'your mum' jokes.
<Wad_Shooter> LOL, smooth
<Mal> Shut up, your mum takes it in the arse.
#240606
< whatsinthename> whats the command to turn on conference mode for this channel
< doub> just "hi!" is sometimes working
< inflex> change your nick to something like Sweet16Candy
#25641
<J{E}K> What is the best song of NIN?
<uidv6> ALL THE SILENT TRACKS ON BROKEN
#6601
Fred> This computer deserves to go to hell
Max> Dont you mean Siliconhell?
Fred> What ?
Max> Its the place where all dead calculators go to
Fred> Really?
#10423
<nwinter> i think i could've made a better spreadsheet with graph paper
and a crayon.
<hep> hahaha
<nwinter> i had to put an audit i did into a spreadsheet because
apparently my boss doesn't like documents in the UNIVERSALLY READABLE
format known as ASCII.
<nwinter> he will soon receive my weekly status report as an attachment
named "micromanagement.txt"
#1931
<luciddrms> boy irc is like a common link to everything fucked up on the internet