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#2018
<MadHatter> I wish I could get a job as a stunt penis
<MadHatter> like for porno movies
<MadHatter> I don't look like a pornstar(not that I'm ugly, I just don't have that look), but I have a porno penis
#60290
<_Foxy> And I am sitting in math next to the hottest chick ever cuz the teacher said thats the only thing that will keep me awake :/
<_Foxy> I was always sleeping and man...my dick is in pain after 2 hours next to her with her miniskirt!
<_Foxy> damn I'm gonna watch some more porn
<_Foxy> brb
#676
[23:07] <feMMey> i leave for europe in 4 days
[23:07] <rys> on purpose?
#31926
<anamexis> oh man
<anamexis> I was opening a coke, right
--> Beefpile (~mbeefpile@cloaked.wi.rr.com) has joined #themacmind
<anamexis> and it exploded
<anamexis> ALMOST all over my keyboard
<anamexis> but I got it away just in time
<-- Beefpile has quit (sick fuckers)
<anamexis> :<
#15073
* Suzuran managed to make KDE change all of the text and error messages (even the ones in shell windows) to Japanese.
<kinzillah> Suzuran: can you read them though?
<Suzuran> kinzillah: Hell no. ^_^
#8934
<@kt> i'm going to put icey hot on my nipples again
<@kt> bye
#299563
Alyssa: soo, how are we going to be awesome? i leave what we're doing up to you, cause i just sit around
Marc Truant: pshhh, anything
Marc Truant: we could watch a movie or hang at the mall. maybe chill at a house. fuck. anything!
Alyssa: okayy :D it's up to you
Marc Truant: you didnt catch that, did you?
Alyssa: ...oh
#28957
<Hatter> I'm gonna try routing the ds3 and 3 t-1 lines through a single cisco 3640
<Hatter> I hope it works ok
<yelworc> holy crap
<yelworc> who could possibly need that much porn?
<splice> hah
<splice> see, hatter jerks off multiple dicks in addition to his own
#61068
Ryan: Whats a good lie to fill some hours in? I have a day with nothing. lol
Andrew: uh.. something with orcs?
Ryan: lol, that would be telling the truth.
Andrew: thats sad
Ryan: I was playing WoW
#3563
<Slant> Maybe I'll be able to ignore my GOD DAMN NEED TO HUMP ANYTHING HUMAN AND FEMALE
<Slant> ANYTHING
<Zor-SLEEP> i feel for your sisters.
#54338
Alex: whats cyanide?
GrimMisfit: it's what emo kids take for depression
#27658
[GrasMan] when i heard that holly jones' murderer was a software developer for MDS i though 'Hey, that means a job opening'
#31063
<Excreta_Pusher_5000> anyone want to buy a bass guitar?
<Excreta_Pusher_5000> from my experiences, girls will want to lay you if you know how to play bass guitar
<DP> you're an idiot
#10695
<@Nfs> what good is all the fame if you aint fuckin the models?
<@BLiNGO> umm
<@BLiNGO> you dont need fame to fuck models
<@Nfs> but its gettin hot in herre, so take off all your clothes..
<@BLiNGO> i am gettin so hot, i will take my clothes off
* @BLiNGO sets mode: -clothes BLiNGO
#294828
<PurityOfEssence> I was at the gym, and I was looking at the distance left: 1km, 500m, 250m, 125m ..
<PurityOfEssence> this is how all mathmo's nightmares go
<PurityOfEssence> a fear of infinite sums diverging
<PurityOfEssence> you'll never get there, just keep getting half way closer
<PurityOfEssence> damn zeno
#27226
<Dilbert> i've got an idea that would help artists from having their music pirated
<Dilbert> instead of naming all their
<Dilbert> songs
<Dilbert> just give them a number
<Dilbert> like 1, 2, 3 so on
<Dilbert> and if everyone does that
<Dilbert> nobody online will be able to find the songs they are looking for
<Dilbert> or something
<Dilbert> i dont know
<Dilbert> forget i said anything
#8265
* The_Paco went to the GE appliance store today, crouch-walked up to one of the large black super-fridges, ran my hand over it while humming the theme to 2001, stood up, and smacked my bud... they threw us out shortly thereafter.
#34041
<[PIT]PhillyB_workn> this is crazy:
<[PIT]PhillyB_workn> A 7-year-old boy was arrested and charged with sexually molesting a 5-year-old girl (Morristown, N.J., November). And an 8-year-old boy, accused of fondling four 7-year-old girls, agreed to enter sex-offender rehabilitation (Mount Clemens, Mich., December)
<[PIT]PhillyB_workn> And a 12-year-old girl, who was improperly touched by a 40-year-old man (resulting in his conviction for lewd conduct), was revealed by court investigators to have voluntarily performed oral sex on, or intercourse with, at least 40 men (Monterey, Calif., February).
<Uranus> dude, whats sad is that 7 year old kids are getting laid and I'm not
<[PIT]PhillyB_workn> lol Uranus
<|223|Bob|Duk> ROFL
<|223|Bob|Duk> so true...
<bleepstreet> cause he's got mad style
<ShminkyBoy> the 12 year old should be given some head doctor treatment
<bleepstreet> or a medal
#35764
<chem> god
<chem> I asked this guy
<chem> to take a picture of his "drug stash"
<chem> so he sneds to me on AIM
<chem> AND HE SENDS ME 3 PICTURES OF HIS FUCKING DICK
<chem> jesus fucking christ
<chem> X.X
<soulbleed> hahaha
#12104
<icas0r> somsone do a stats on decoded
<icas0r> i think he a fed =[
<rightie> nah feds only have Netzero for their isp
<rightie> they cut back on funding
#295686
<tobeh_> dfg
<tobeh_> hi guize
<tobeh_> im wearin lingerie under my clothes
<tobeh_> wanted 2 feel sexy
<whfsdude> I'm wearing naked under my clothes
<tobeh_> nice
#13973
<Zack`> I wore my boxers backwards all day yesterday
<shea_> haha
<Zack`> And I didn't realize it until I scratched my ass
<Zack`> And my hand went through the slot and made contact with my crack
<Zack`> And I was like WTF
#11892
<lb-> They kept telling me I couldn't talk to a doctor.
<lb-> I was like "Well, I drank a good amount of my own pee. I'D LIKE TO SPEAK TO A FUCKING DOCTOR."
#1212
<g> <FedAg455> hey wanna meet with me for some sex? im 13/f/canada, wanna meet in usa in front of brooklyn police department?
<g> <cooey> how do i know you are 14 D:
#7171
::Sathane.. I am wlasys sober
::Sathane.. excpet when I dirnk