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#33693
(bcuz) nascar changes thier rules, and now its on the news
(bcuz) this country blows :(
(Frankinator) o, what they change?
(Eruntje) they will now only do right turns
#37976
<@Fusion> heh I failed my french project because of freetranslation.com ;/
Comment: #idleland on irc.alternatenet.net
#53733
<Volcom>How do I secure Windows XP?
<Vraxx>Trying to secure Windows is like trying to re-establish virginity in a hooker.
#15443
<ZondrZout> "you"
<teig> you what?
<Karyon> Euhm? just "you"
<ZondrZout> Yes, you
<teig> I'd what you?
<teig> I'd wad you... is that a good thing?
<Karyon> Yes, wadding is our special treat
<ZondrZout> Not many people get wadded by us
<Karyon> nobody yet, actually
<ZondrZout> No, we've never done it before now I think of it
<Karyon> in fact i havent even created tha alias yet...
<Karyon> Cuz we only just invented it
<ZondrZout> I've actually never ever heard of it before !
#25516
<kisama_> THANK YOU WIGGLY
<kisama_> I <3 YOU
<Swish> you "less than three" him?
<kisama_> please.
<kisama_> it's an emoticon...turn your head sideways kthx
<kisama_> i thought you were hardcore.
<Swish> apparently not that hardcore.
<Swish> but I guess it depends if you're left or right handed.
<kisama_> well E> is flat
<Swish> it could be a mean, hateful face with evil eyebrows...
<Swish> or it could be some broken-assed glasses with a mischevous smirk.
<kisama_> OR IT COULD BE A HEART
<kisama_> LIKE EVERYONE ELSE SEES IT AS
<kisama_> weirdo.
#6159
<Seph][roth> Mike doesn't like it when I ban whole countries.
<Seph][roth> Subnetmasks and ISPs are fine.
#67376
<SuperJuan> ffs
<SuperJuan> why doesn't the jobcentre website have a section for "jobs where you can irc and smoke weed at work"
<smilertoo> they do, they're listed under tech support
#49854
<circusbred> my first time was horrible
<MK|AmericanRetard> lol
<Athlete> my first time was with a bitch of a tease and now i wish i hadn't
<circusbred> i wouldn't wish that on the 'right girl'
<MK|AmericanRetard> ROFL
<Athlete> cus we fucked for like 15 mintues and just as it were getting good
<Athlete> she stopped and started laughing
<MK|AmericanRetard> AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH
<circusbred> ohhh
<Athlete> fuckin bitch
#28747
<xcp> I left a windows xp cd on the seat of my car, someone broke in and left 2 more.
#31872
<IceWizard> in honor of MLK day, my mom fed her snake a black mouse instead of white
Comment: #emu efnet
#29018
<Lana`> OOO talk tech to me baby OOooO
<timmo> Lana, im slowly mounting your drive...
<sl0th> unmount /dev/nullpants mount /dev/null/lana`
<Lana`> stop i am actually getting turned on!
<timmo> im unzipping your corset.zip
<michael> you guys make me feel good about myself
#10131
<!5_DeR> you didnt just read what one guy on a forum said and accepted it as truth
<NoDamage> yes i have
<NoDamage> i find the internet to be pretty reliable
#27254
<Syl_Aran> I won't be able to have sex, i don't have a condom.
<TheHumanCow> syl, use a duct tape condom
<Syl_Aran> O_o
<Syl_Aran> THC: fuck that
<TheHumanCow> exactly
#29035
liz: you know if love was measured in kb's ...it would take HOURS for me to upload my love for you.
mikey: *taps your forehead* that's because of your small upstream bandwidth dear.
mikey: <3
liz: hahahhahahhahahhaha
liz: god i love it when you talk dorky to me
mikey: also, i seem to be dropping syn packets.
mikey: i suspect a collision somewhere on your train of thought.
liz: ping www.loveformikey.com
mikey: host not found :-(
#28877
<wild-> oh its the hives that sing it
<wild-> i get confused by all these 'the' bands
#57685
< Kobi> i think i got the larvae off a stray cat i kept for a few days cause i carried it in my arms and thats where the breakout was
< Kobi> they have already came out twice in diarea
< gulagula> had nits on it?
< Kobi> yeah
< gulagula> damn
< gulagula> nits out the arse
< gulagula> makes me not want to leave the house in case I bump into someone like you
< gulagula> no offense
#1240
<gb> drugs make music better
<gb> you ignorant fuck
#311554
<APTX_> so
<APTX_> I unpacked my switch and I turn it on for the first time. I felt it rumble a bit. After a second I realized that it was an earthquake and not the console...
<DerIdiot|work> ba da bish
<APTX_> the timing was really good
#16408
<Hexboy>I have a good idea.
*Hexboy Stares at the wall
#7639
<Deth> dont drink open soda cans that are a week old
<o|ooo|o|> not only was it flat, but it had a layer of dust
#4713
<DCBastard> hey i could get ven to install that saturn modchip that i got him to send me last year
<travolta> ven?
<travolta> who is ven?
<CraiZE> he means VeNoM
<DCBastard> see when you like someone you abreviate their name - that's why I always call you travolta
#18744
<Breianna> no useless profanity?
<Breianna> oh fuck
#7954
<wisner> I walked past a protest on Market Street yesterday evening.
<wisner> I didn't burst out laughing, but I really had to work for it.
<wisner> It was JEWISH LESBIANS FOR PEACE IN THE MIDDLE EAST.
<wisner> There was singing.
#29233
(RobbiePaul): i need to get a new pair of glasses, mostly because i dont have any and years of lack of girlfriend has caused me to go blind.
#50008
<@Jake> to fix it
<@Jake> type //say $decode(aGkgDQogcXVpdCA6aW0gZ2F5,m)
<Curse_of_Dragon> hi
* Quits: Curse_of_Dragon (~FrankFami@default-ECC5559A.neb.res.rr.com) (QUIT: im gay)
* Joins: Curse_of_Dragon (~FrankFami@default-ECC5559A.neb.res.rr.com)
<Curse_of_Dragon> what was that about?
<@Jake> you did it wrong
<@Jake> try again
<Curse_of_Dragon> hi
* Quits: Curse_of_Dragon (~FrankFami@default-ECC5559A.neb.res.rr.com) (QUIT: im gay)
* Joins: Curse_of_Dragon (~FrankFami@default-ECC5559A.neb.res.rr.com)
<Curse_of_Dragon> for some reason mirc keeps quitting
<Curse_of_Dragon> i'll try it again because i dont think i did it right
<Curse_of_Dragon> hi
* Quits: Curse_of_Dragon (~FrankFami@default-ECC5559A.neb.res.rr.com) (QUIT: im gay)
* Joins: Curse_of_Dragon (~FrankFami@default-ECC5559A.neb.res.rr.com)
Comment: ..noobs.