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#16694
«FivePee»: brb gotta piss and get a cock
«FivePee»: omg
«FivePee»: get a coke
«Electronut»: rofl
#3600
<BombScare> hmmm...choices choices, either get dressed and go get lunch, or sit here and wait for dinner
<BombScare> damn im lazy
#26322
<Derek> i got gforce 2 ti 64 meg tv out :D
<Death_Mageorz> oooh
<Death_Mageorz> i want a tv out
<Death_Mageorz> so bad
<Death_Mageorz> so i can record shows
#4082
<[ric]> Jim, tsk, tsk... you're getting as bad as me :)
<JibberJim> Eh, I've never been unnatural with a goat.
<[ric]> jim... ok, almost as bad as me
#34843
<@cyberdyn_> HAHAHA
<@cyberdyn_> This car in the parking lot just hit a cup and blew a tire
<@ramdond> @_@
<@cyberdyn_> It appears that there were nails in the cup
#51913
<Neon> Well, there's a surefire boner-killer. Watching porn on Windows Media Player and realizing that you have the MSN music plugin enabled, showing the girl you'd like to ask out soon the title of what you're watching.
#57554
<MarkTheMeS> Sharon Stone looked a little like Kelly Ripa on Letterman the other day.
<Eternal_Sunshine_Mind> she reminds me too much of an aunt of mine. so kinda creepy.
<MarkTheMeS> Single aunt?
<Eternal_Sunshine_Mind> 5 kids married
<Eternal_Sunshine_Mind> 6 kids*
<monolithblue> wow, that was fast work
<MarkTheMeS> yikes
<Junk> she just shoot out another one?!
#27253
<@DieHard> dock
<@DieHard> my neighbors house is on fire!
<@Forty> DH!
<@Forty> RUN
<@Forty> SAVE THE PENTIUMS
<@DieHard> i run amd
#30065
<@MrSaturn> Friend of mine goes to Fry's
<@MrSaturn> He obsesses over it
<@MrSaturn> He's like
<@MrSaturn> "OMG I FRIED MY MOTHERBOARD! HOORAY!"
#56827
(+[dps]rannmann) i wonder what this command does
(+[dps]rannmann) maybe it'll blow up my mirc
(+[dps]rannmann) playing: "The Infamous Double Dildo Janine!! (xxx dildo fist fuck sex porn ficken anal divx).mpg" .:1384kbps|Stereo|8:26:.
(+[dps]rannmann) FUCK
(+[dps]rannmann) NO
(+[dps]rannmann) THAT'S WHAT IT DOES
(+[dps]rannmann) ignore that!
Comment: Owned?
#10739
* Spoon casts Wall of Silence
*** Spoon sets mode: +m
<Goku> why?
<Spoon> Because exo went insane
<Goku> no, he just brought his insanity up to another level
* Sentinel checks..
*** Sentinel sets mode: -m
<exogen> THERE'S BUTTER ON MY FACE!
*** Sentinel sets mode: +m
#16586
<shagman> and here I go rollerblading in black jeans and a dark blue t-shirt
<shagman> it must be 40 out
<SourKey> your nuts
<shagman> yeah, they're hot too
#21658
<Guo_Si> Hey, you know what sucks?
<TheXPhial> vaccuums
<Guo_Si> Hey, you know what sucks in a metaphorical sense?
<TheXPhial> black holes
<Guo_Si> Hey, you know what just isn't cool?
<TheXPhial> lava?
#298897
<~firez> nothing beat irc in bed tho
<~firez> or the instant moment you wake up
<&Adorable> Laptop > DS
<~firez> i dont have a laptop
<&Adorable> I do
<&Adorable> What I don't have; however, is my mother telling me to get off the computer because 11PM is past my bedtime :D
<~firez> lol
<~firez> i do
<&Adorable> I know :/
#298803
<jatboy0> hello
<segin> uhh, hi?
<jatboy0> what is use of grep
<segin> Have you read the grep manual?
<jatboy0> yes
<segin> Do you understand English?
<jatboy0> yes
<segin> Then what is the problem?
#27868
<lordCONAN> just cause something was written before you were porn, doesnt mean its shit
<Twinsen> HAHAHA
<Dextas> porn on the mind eh lc?
#30638
***EvilSpork declares you all to be extremely sophisticated Eliza programs
aykroyd: how does extremely sophisticated Eliza programs make you feel?
#17967
<LlamaKing> i spell disc with a C when referring to cd's, and with a k then referring to floppies :o
<Ace0522> sometimes i'll lable a vcd disc1 and disk2
<Ace0522> it's just random with me
<LlamaKing> heh
<Ace0522> sometimes i accidently write dick b/c im thinking of both...and the "S" just gets dropped out
<LlamaKing> LOL
<Ace0522> then i scratch it out best i can and re-write it
<LlamaKing> dick1 and dick2
<LlamaKing> haha
#17023
<+TlMMAH> hey gary
<+TlMMAH> what is porno that i should download
<+TlMMAH> i am putting my dick into your hands here
<+TlMMAH> not literally but, you know
#266249
<Jesus> Lee: tricking wow players into installing keyloggers must be an fun activity
<Jesus> I imagine you'd eventually lose your vision looking at page after page of wwwwwwwwwwwwssadwasdadadwdawdadawwwwwwwwwwwwwadssssssdasdawwwwwwwwwwwdaswwa
#57867
<Blabber> i just started working out, to get me some muscle and feel confident
<Blabber> so after the first time, i come home and look at myself in the mirror
<Blabber> to see if there is already improvement
<Blabber> my mom steps in and says "you look good enough to play in a warmovie"
<Blabber> so she boosts my confidence and i say thx! like a sergeant you mean?
<Blabber> and i swear to god then she says: no like a concentration camp victim
<Blabber> she left the room laughing her ass off...
#32873
<Alvein> most of my internet knowledge comes from finding porn
#27941
<eg0mech> Someday you'll find that special girl, give her a couple dollars, and experience that special thing.
#309421
<luz> i'm dizzy and it hurts to breathe
<LAMMJohnson> luz: Lay down and stop breathing
#311421
<CaptainJistuce> I am still waging a linguistic battle against that use of the term fixed. Surely an animal works as intended before the procedure, which renders a major subsystem inoperational. They are broken afterwards.