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#19716
<Rendezvou> I want a monkey at home that jerks off and throws shit at people when I host parties at my house.
<`KArmA> Rendezvou: to take the strain off of having you do it?
#52838
<Kyle> ah yes, I remember my first time..she was lying on the bed and I was holding my coat and saying out loud "hmm I cant decide whether or not I'm going to do this with my coat on or off.." and shes looking at me like "wtf" and I start putting it on and I continue talking "and right now its looking like..coat"
#302228
<@heels> i wanna be a hooker
<Doomstalk> heels: You're already a whore in your own way
<Cuzza> heels: you're already a whore
<Cuzza> ^5 Doomstalk
<Doomstalk> ^5 Cuzza
<Cuzza> ...
<Cuzza> GET OUT OF MY HEAD
<Doomstalk> GET OUT OF MY HEAD CHARLES
<Cuzza> WHAT THE FUCK MAN
#2515
<ckx> hrm does anybody else ever think "yep... the internet... vast information and opportunities at my disposal..."
<ckx> and then just sit at the search engine
<ckx> :/
#242
<McMoo> An infinite number of monkeys, on an infinite number of typewriters, will eventually produce the collected works of Shakespeare. John Romero's Daikatana was a ten-minute, five-monkey job.
#98
<ikkenai> i don't have hard drives. i just keep 30 chinese teenagers in my basement and force them to memorize numbers
#27897
<b1nk> i'm rich
<b1nk> one of the richest kids in toronto
<efnex> haha, getting rich in canada is as easy as getting sars in china
#308728
<myself> I'm reminded of alphawolf's story of tracking down some guy who was sending strange traffic, and turned out to live in the next town over.
<myself> Guy's personal website included a pic of himself holding a banana like a gun.
<myself> so, wolfie and Evil head over there, armed with bananas and an Ethereal printout. Bang on the door. Someone answers, looks like the guy in the pic.
<myself> <threatening banana-stance>TELNET POLICE. STOP PINGING GARGAMEL.</stance>
<myself> And they leave.
<myself> Stunned. Silence.
<myself> the packets stopped.
#56621
<robert> No one is talking in here anyways
<SVRCompHobbyist> so it's OK to flood, so long as no one else was talking?
<SVRCompHobbyist> that's bullshit
<SVRCompHobbyist> flooding is bad whether or not someone was talking
<robert> why?
<Kalypso> it puts thousands and thousands of people out of their homes =[
Comment: #wpi
#15624
<rtwh0> why are you upset?
<sugadon> who the hell says i was god damn upset? huh?
<rtwh0> umm never mind
<sugadon> i hate people who spread god damn rumors, muther fucker , god damn
#2069
<Daz-D3> wanna see somethin funny ld?
<LordDeath> No. Please pull your pants back up.
#7497
<mild7> its always real nice when you step out of bed and step into wetness
#25170
<NewSonCometh> my sister found 50 bucks today
<NewSonCometh> then the person who dropped it asked her if she found it
<NewSonCometh> with the clenched 50 sticking out of her hand, she said "Nope, I don't have any cash at all"
<NewSonCometh> then the lady just walked away
<NewSonCometh> I wish more people with an abundance of 50's were that stupid
#29455
<Techdeck> note to self: www.manpages.com is NOT an online resource to get *nix man pages
#17959
<celebrity_nitwit> scrotum
<W0RMW00D> scrotum
<d1rge> damn im hungry
#29318
<Odat> I remember that time I told the hair chick to cut about an inch off the back
<Odat> but what she heard was "cut all my hair as short as you possibly can"
<Odat> bad acoustics, I guess
<NakedKitty> wow.... yeah... that seems to happen a lot
<NakedKitty> or... her inch was a lot bigger than yours
<Odat> impossible
<Odat> men have the largest notion of an inch
#37034
* Masked_ninja sneaks up behinde Guest85523 and shuves the sword thro its neck and goes back to hiding
* Masked_ninja ruds behinde DameDesu and jumps on his head andtwists his head in a 180 dregge angle and jumps off
<Masked_ninja> runs*
<Mayseth> Oh please.
<Mayseth> Don't start correcting spelling errors now
#56801
<LabMonkey> damnit
<LabMonkey> there went my afternoon
<LabMonkey> THANKS FOR RUINING MY LIFE, KARMA
<KArmA> its what I do
<KArmA> try and be a better person
Comment: #bifemunix on EFnet
#3918
<zetullus> This is just not happening. Im sure I was smarter than this when I went to bed
#51392
<f0rked> it has that awful droning NEH NEH NEH alarm clock sound.. and sometimes I don't wake up, I just dream about trying to shut it off. My latest dream today was: I was in a school with a bunch of people, and everyone could hear this loud alarm and we were all crowded in the hallway running around trying to figure out how to shut it off. Eventually I figured out I was emitting it and executed a regular expression with my watch like s/#alarm#// to shut it ...
<f0rked> ... off. Once I knew it was me, I turned it back on, gathered up a bunch of people, then got ahead of them and showed them as I turned it off. My point was to tell people to learn regular expressions.
<f0rked> it was fucked up.
#8458
<Punk-In-Drublic> THE FOLLOWING PEOPLE SUCK COCK ...Mousey, Dave, Vas, Belindah..........YALL CAN GAT FUCKED COS IM DRUNK WOOOOOOOOO ......BOOBIES WOOOOOOOOOO'
<Mousey> why am i first
<Mousey> thats really insulting
<vas-deferens> because your the best at iut
<mk4> why am i second ?
<vas-deferens> shit im third
<vas-deferens> i better work on my technique
<vas-deferens> at least im beating a chick
<Mousey> hahahah
#76609
<John8520> I play mexican checkers
<zashi> John8520, you hide coke in the pieces and smuggle them onto the other side of the board?
#55217
<imprfect> So my mum ended up calling me and asked me to come over her.
<imprfect> *Here! HERE! HERE DAMMIT!
#305467
< ArtForz> work is failure to efficiently procrastinate.
#8485
<Kaff> how festy are we talking ?
<tm> makes your armpits seem like surgical theatres