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#57593
<Steck> Oft, your not welcome here
<Oft> bullshit
<Oft> they all want me here
<Carcer> Steck, you have no right to say whether or not he's welcome here
<Steck> Really?
<Steck> Why not?
<Carcer> Because this isn't your channel, you douchebag?
<Steck> How about, this is my IRC network
Steck is ~Steck@netadmin.neverwinterconnections.com * Steck
<Carcer> Yeah.
<Carcer> That would be a good reason for him not to be welcome here.
<Oft> I could take you with one hand
<Steck> Still want to argue Carcer?
<Carcer> Ugh, I need to start reading hostmasks.
#301516
* nuintari facepalms
<nuintari> i never thought this would actually happen
<nuintari> I just had a customer ask if we used IP addresses
<nuintari> the ensuing discussion turned into him _demanding_ that we not make him use an IP address, because they made him vulnerable to attack
<nuintari> no amount of calm explaining was reaching him, so I start talking extremely sarcastically
<rm-rf> what would he like to use?
<brad> postal addresses!
<brad> maidenhead grid squares!
<nuintari> "no sir, you sir, if you choose not to use an IP address, what happens is, the data packets arrive to your computer on the backs of very small, hard working amoebas"
<nuintari> I disabled him from DHCP.... let him never get an address, and said, "but unfortunately, those little bastards have been on strike for years, your choices are IP address, or cancel service"
<nuintari> then I told him that this was by far and wide, the dumbest request I had ever heard
#29422
<btm4k> ill brb - picking up kids from the bus stop
<Scared_Of_SD_Gundam> PEDOPHILE
#14460
<[oQp]> anyone ever used Delta Airlines here?
<alec_eso> i have
<[oQp]> how is it?
<carlsb3rg> They always come down
#37489
<+swedegeek> MrDelayer, how come discussion always moves to centering around mail anatomy when you're around?
<MrDelayer> mail anatomy?
<MrDelayer> like
<MrDelayer> postal workers
<MrDelayer> "Hey baby, nice package"
#16248
(jbk) I think i'm going to get some alcohol this weekend seeing as i'm done with building robots
(jbk) and that calls for a celebration :)
(_none) jbk: youre probably the only person that has ever said that sentence
#53151
<k2xl> in 1998, i made a C++ program to calculate pi to a billion digits.
<k2xl> i coded it on my laptop (pentium 2 i think) and then ran the program.
<k2xl> the next day i got a new laptop but decided to keep the program running.
<k2xl> it's been over seven years now since i ran it. and this morning it finished calculating.
<k2xl> the output:
<k2xl> "THE VALUE OF PI TO THE BILLIONTH DIGIT IS = "
<k2xl> mindblowing eh?
<k2xl> i looked in the code of my program, and i found out that i forgot to output the value :(.
Comment: true story, i fixed the code and am running it again
#188547
<Technocactus> It was actually better when my dad found my porn than when he found out I watched Oprah.
#7630
<XxChesterxX> who here uses a dildough
<Solidus> only when i'm making some dilbread
#8544
<timovgod> why is it that not 10 minutes after they put the straight-jacket on my nuts start to itch?
#2074
<memo> Kazz, do you WANT your dick bit off? Didn't we just have an in-depth discussion earlier today on why that's not a good thing?
#135732
<flame> i once tasted this girl who soooo salt&sour
<flame> she was delicious
<flame> very pleasant
<flame> wonder what makes that
<lee> semen
#952
(Mutiny) Atarax: you ate a americum disk from a smoke detector?
(Atarax) Mutiny: yeah
(Mutiny) Atarax: why?
(Atarax) Mutiny: I thought it would give me special powers.
(Mutiny) Atarax: what did it do to you?
(Atarax) Mutiny: well, it didn't give me any special powers, but it didn't kill me either
(Atarax) Darwin must be spinning in his grave
(Atarax) "why is that fuck still alive"
#303758
<Sebas> Heh, some of our neighbours at Wacken had 30 kilos of dry ice to cool their drinks. It worked after a fashion, but it's difficult to drink whiskey when it's frozen solid.
<Sebas> Of course, my first reaction when they told me was "Hah. Hard liquor."
#31493
Velociraptor: Do you have ne updog?
SAMrhodes87: What the fuck is UPDOG?
Velociraptor: nuthin much wha bout u?
#15688
< aurikan> they never actually get together you realize
< aurikan> after link saves zelda she becomes an uberbitch and they part ways, zelda fooling around with pages, link frequenting the local brothel
#22932
<sampson> rad, that link crashed my browser in the middle of booking a flight
<sampson> EXCELLENT
<sampson> THANKS!
<aves2k> sorry if your browser doesn't support new Internet technologies
<aves2k> like JPG
#4816
<kanin> if (User->HasAppropriateBook()) { while (User->LacksClue()) { User->ReadAppropriateBook(); } }
else { while(User->HasNotGottenAppripriateBook()) {User->StumbleAroundHalfAssedInTheDark(); User->WhineOnIRC(); } }
#8864
<+Sonikku> 10 PRINT "_Bobbi_ is a PROGRAMER!"
<+Sonikku> 20 GOTO 10
<@dixon> Sonikku: what is that ? assembly ?
#7065
<skatoni> will some one please help
<shev> ya?
<skatoni> there is a guy hacking into my computer
<shev> unplug your modem
<skatoni> how?
<shev> see those wires behind your computer?
<shev> rip'em all out
*** skatoni has quit IRC (Read error to skatoni[ppp012.rosenet.net]: Connection reset by peer)
#6531
<Grumman> I got windows 200pro today.
<shithead1> windows 200? did marcus aurelius use that?
#54362
<raela> man today in bio when I was actually paying attention I heard the best owned story
<raela> this girl learned about blood typing and how to do genetic crosses with it
<raela> so she got all excited, went home, and found out her and her parents blood types from her mom
<raela> she then realized there was no way possible her dad was related to her
<raela> or at least, not the father
<raela> it took her awhile to get her mom to admit it >:D
#57727
<Grendel> I just got handed to torch of OH&S rep for the branch
<Grendel> Under humourous circumstances
<Grendel> I cut myself on a de-burring machine, yelled "FUCK" and got myself a bandaid
<Grendel> Our OH&S guy Damo said "You know where the bandaids are? Maybe you should be the rep instead of me"
#24194
<+DarkCraft> yeah well evil don't win many popularity contests...
* +DarkCraft knows this.
<@FlowerChild> DarkCraft you are in no way evil
<+DarkCraft> I am in the sense that I choose to opt out of the whole good/evil axis in favour of more empiricist ideas.. ;)
<@FlowerChild> blah you still fall asleep cuddling soft toys
#304516
<Sebas> When I was working as an orderpicker, I had to get some assorted terrycloth towels. "Terrycloth" in Dutch is "badstof", and both that and "assorted" get abbreviated, so on my list it said I needed 5 "bad ass towels".