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#114
<Dreamlyre> wife, hooker...its about the same...you gotta pay for it
#8250
<Amenace> so your a fifteen year old girl that thinks my wife is hot, hang on while i have a wank
#33035
(fleet): what I love about this channel is that no matter what I say, temp0 tells me to rail myself with a metal pole.
(temp0): i like you fleet
(fleet): really?
(temp0): NO! FUCK OFF AND RAIL YOURSELF WITH A METAL POLE
#14968
<Icereaver> how do i go afk?
#51625
<DmncAtrny> I will write on a huge cement block "BY ACCEPTING THIS BRICK THROUGH YOUR WINDOW, YOU ACCEPT IT AS IS AND AGREE TO MY DISCLAIMER OF ALL WARRANTIES, EXPRESS OR IMPLIED, AS WELL AS DISCLAIMERS OF ALL LIABILITY, DIRECT, INDIRECT, CONSEQUENTIAL OR INCIDENTAL, THAT MAY ARISE FROM THE INSTALLATION OF THIS BRICK INTO YOUR BUILDING."
<DmncAtrny> And then hurl it through the window of a Sony officer
<DmncAtrny> and run like hell
#295612
<%bassist> 2 days ago i answered a telemarketer pretending i was a telemarketer selling them stuff
#26389
(Laurie) My ports are gettin more action than I am today.
#33026
<@Keiron> Yahoo search brings up 24,400,000 hits for "porn"
<@Keiron> google brings up 92,700,000 hits for "porn"
<@Arcturus> Google - 300% more Pornful.
Comment: #voices on darkmyst
#50149
<Jason> And... the test is finished.
<Tristal> What was the test, "Can I drink this fifth of Jack Daniels in under 3 minutes?"
<Tristal> Because I noticed you cramming really hard before the exam
#5089
<langdon> FUCK OFF AND HELP ME
<langdon> i mean
<langdon> fuck on
<langdon> fuck over here and help me
#668
<homerj> I wish I had a detachable penis
<homerj> then when I went out as a woman, I wouldn't have to tape it up
#44405
<Anomaly> I have a problem with my printer, can anybody help?
<Anomaly> I was printing out a photograph but the sun and the sky were messed up, they were black and purple
*** starwarsgamer has joined #outboards
<Galaxy Mage> Apparantly, your cyan-hole and your yellow-hole are clogged, but your magenta-hole and your black-hole are fine.
*** starwarsgamer has quit (sick fuckers)
<Galaxy Mage> ...
#22069
<moijk|mpr> Our sales guy have become a alcoholic, is that a bad sign?
<Jumper> depends, does he sell more, less or equal?
<moijk|mpr> well, he have yet to show up for work for the last week so I guess that ought to tell his current preformance.
<moijk|mpr> but he is 32, lives with his mother in the basement, has no girlfriend, hangs out in pubs where the teenagers hang out (18 limit) and drives his mothers car. i would have started drinking if i were him too :)
#18756
<FiZi> I WANT YOU TO CALL ME
<FiZi> JUST SO I CAN SAY "OH HELLO MR. TROLL FAG! YOUR MATURE!" and then hangup on YOU
<WO-Booz> it'd be funny if you actually make spelling errors when you speak, too
#47369
(@Rjx`) two words:
(@Rjx`) correction lfuid
(@Rjx`) *fluid
Comment: EFNet/#geekissues
#26247
<Boogaleeboo> I'm sorry your budget only allows for 5 dollars to spend on hookers
<Boogaleeboo> And I'm sorry your ugliness only allows sex with hookers
<Joe_> How much does yours allow, Boog?
<Boogaleeboo> Silly
<Boogaleeboo> You don't PAY
<Joe_> Ah, the confessions of a Boston rapist.
<Boogaleeboo> It's not rape if you kill them first
<Joe_> Touche
#41215
<simon-say> asking for relationship advice on irc is like asking for computer help at mcdonalds
#19320
SilvrWolf> "I distinctly heard my Rice Crispies say 'Snap, crackle, go Fu*& yourself'."
#3167
<myst> nah, snow is cool.
<Joshua> if you're a bear.
<myst> skiing, snowboarding, etc.
<myst> just have to dress for it
<Joshua> that's how i broke my arm for the first time
<Joshua> snowboarding
<myst> oh ouch
<Joshua> or rather, falling down a hill because you SUCK at snowboarding
#53019
<@Currawong> I have a 486 in the corner that's been compiling XFree since 1999.
<@Currawong> Every so often I think about cancelling the job, but then I'd have to go shop for a space heater.
#6270
<pipedream> one time i pee'd on the mcdonalds restroom floor
<pipedream> but it was a "statement"
#30616
<phr0work> using linux is like using windows, except every time you try to do something like install a program or a driver or set a different resolution, a big black dude runs in and kicks you in the side of the head
#8845
<Fetch#acknak> 19 apache processes
<Fetch#acknak> I think maybe your mail server has a problem ;)
<karlitoX#acknak> are those forked or threaded
<Fetch#acknak> karlitoX: does it matter? its a mail server ;)
<karlitoX#acknak> it's a mail server with aspirations! do not stifle it's creativity
#15184
(Pulse): did u know it was part of dayly life in egypt to wank
(cypheh): its part of my daily life too
(Pulse): aye
(senn): same
#2963
<MrSede> They made a movie of Phantom Of The Opera. I was like "woah, they made a movie of Phantom Of The Opera." Then I didn't watch it
<Geothermal> you too eh