Random | Latest | Best | Full Site
#296710
<Bapa> Hello beautiful, flawless people of #MOOP.
<godsprophet> sorry, none of those people are here right now
<godsprophet> please leave a message after the long, awkward silence
<Bapa> What makes it awkward?
<sui> i'm naked.
#12029
<BlakMajiK> my dad said "we need to get ready for this y2k bullshit, i'm gonna fill the fridge in the basement full of beer"
#18333
Larry: I'm to go eat. People get hungry sometimes.
Juan: I hope you put clothes on b4 you went
<30 mins later>
Larry: fuck
Larry: that's why they were looking at me funny
#300852
<ranc0r> IT Rule: When Symantec buys a product, it goes to shit.
#230434
<MajorWood> fack
<MajorWood> i just clogged the toilet
<MajorWood> had to put on a latex glove to manually unplug
<LiquidManZero> You fisted your toilet...?
#57074
<hello> my dad was at the mayo clinic and they did some test where they had to put a tube down his throat and they cut him and he started to bleed internally and almost died
<hello> worst clinic ever
<egg> that's why you don't let condiments perform surgery.
#56157
(+tfg) I wonder how far my punto could tow a caravan
(gez) nowhere without being illegal, otherwise anywhere downhill
(+tfg) how would it be illegal?
(gez) your licence wont cover it
(+tfg) wrong
(+tfg) as long as it's under 3 tonne I'm sorted
(gez) you sure?
(+tfg) I can drive a car + trailer up to a combined mass of 3500KG
(gez) who the fuck tows anything over 3 tons?
(Jani) aeroplanes weigh over 3 tonnes
(gez) true
(gez) i must remember not to tow mine to school tomorrow
(Jani) gonna fly it instead?
#20177
<Measure> if I was a mom I wouldn't be anti-porn
<eva> my dad takes the 'well at least he's not gay' position
<waffle> eva: yeah, the jokes on him
<eva> shut up fag
<eva> IM NOT GAY
#1260
<wormholes> Is it difficult to manage txt files like modify lines and copy rename and create new ones..with jsut std C libs?
<NoEscom> no, it's not difficult
<Noidea> yes it's difficult.
<Noidea> It's almost impossible.
<NoEscom> oh you mean MODIFY text files? on that case you have to download microsoft sql server
#662
(|Chris) take your dick out of the port
(Chis) hey it worked!
#39695
<shingoki> Simple answer? Debian requires a brain the size of a planet to install. It hates all living things
<shingoki> You see when they created debian, the developers saw that it was so perfect, and so good, that it was an affront to God himself. Unable to destroy their beautiful creation, they instead vowed that it would never be installed by mortal man
<shingoki> And so they bound it forever inside an installer of such evil that no human could look upon it, yet alone use it
Comment: #blenderchat on freenode
#8604
<Atg[M]> Their latest album was going to be called " You are gay" and the cover was going to be a mirror.
#7392
<Dane> i picked ryk up one night when he was completely trashed
<Dane> and he was looking like spewing
<Dane> so i reminded him of my car spew rule
<Tippytoes> which is?
<Dane> "if you hurl you pay me $150 and you have to clean it up"
<KKKBitch> heh
<Dane> and he looked in his pocket
<Dane> and goes
<Dane> "I can cover that"
<Dane> "lets go get curry"
#118453
<Timboss> ur a ray of sunshine on an otherwise midly overcast day with medium risk of percipitation and low UV and pollen count indexes
#28504
<nailer> I think I'm tired - I just spent three seconds wondering why `Data Track' by `Data Track' wouldn't play from this CD
#297921
<bsparks> So, I guess I'm single.
<Tribal> I guess so
<bsparks> well, I'm gonna install Linux a few times
#16594
Ps3000: what are you doing tomorrow at 3:45?
SocialistNinja: waking up
#31593
<nomad> I know my friend's password!
<djoanes> what is it?
<nomad> ******
#3019
<yossarian> theres a hole in my bucket
<tomg> yossarian: did microsoft make it?
<yossarian> yes, MSBucket
<tomg> have they made a patch for it yet?
<tomg> no, they probably want you to upgrade to Bucket.NET
<yossarian> with what shall i fix it dear microsoft, dear microsoft?
<tomg> well the CBR (common bucket runtime) will have embedded security to prevent leaks
#27182
<peekaboo> age?
<teethgrinder> i'm strong
<teethgrinder> 28 years old
<peekaboo> virg?
<peekaboo> plz say no
<teethgrinder> haha, no
<teethgrinder> aquarius
#51406
* [WarMachine] has joined #cesspool
<Gormandu> Where the hell have you been?
<[WarMachine]> banned from the pc
<Gormandu> why?
<[WarMachine]> I showed my parents Goatse when I was drunk
<Gormandu> So they banned you for a week?
<[WarMachine]> No the school year, they went out and took the power cord, but I bought one earlier
<Gormandu> You are so sad.
#15744
<kavonr> our new senior unix sysadmin can't change the ip address on a sun
workstation.
#301224
<Arang> I hate when I have to turn off a computer by holding the power button
<Arang> it just feels way too visceral
<Arang> like I'm holding a pillow over its head
<Arang> "ARANG WHYYYGHGHGHBLGBHGBL"
<Arang> "mfff mfffffff"
<Fax> *windows sound*
#31235
<Kaelic> Broadband, although more expensive than dial-up, is actually saving me money through excessive piracy.
#32488
<Gothic_CatGirl> Blaine the Australian?
<Gothic_CatGirl> wtf kinda boyfriend is that for barbie?
<Gothic_CatGirl> My barbies were lesbians.
<Gothic_CatGirl> Don't you fucking dare quote me.