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#10474
<Charlesowns> Man i was surfin porn and like "normal" surfin at the same time, so my mom comes in and i quick as hell tab down the porn. So now im looking at a SWAT vest and an Mp5 submachinegun trying to hide the giant penis in my pants. Then all of a sudden this realy gay male voice speaks out realy loud goin "i want to suck your big dick ans swallow your hot sperm" then like 100 popups open up all consisting of hardcore fetish gay
<Charlesowns> man my mom started crying and now she thinks im gay... it owns
#310167
<TheGreatSparky> Well over the last 100 years we have made such insane medical and technological advancements. I mean, we have X-Rays and ultra sounds, we can replace hearts and reattach limbs, and we can even perform operations on the human brain. How is it that with all that in mind, shoving a finger up a somebody's asshole is STILL the best method to check a prostate?
#28750
<@n0th1ng> i hate when shit intertwines with my dream, like im fucking some chick then i hear "hey, mow the lawn today"
<@n0th1ng> and im like WTF
#18465
<jitspoe> friends, heh! Social interaction! Heh, a game programmer craves not these things!
#12104
<icas0r> somsone do a stats on decoded
<icas0r> i think he a fed =[
<rightie> nah feds only have Netzero for their isp
<rightie> they cut back on funding
#950
(Amakusa) ALF and Catwoman snuff porn crossover
(Amakusa) I'm afraid that when I make stuff up like that, it really exists out there somewhere ;(
#297420
<meph> gf just said "well im sooorrry i cant solve a rubiks cube in under 30 seconds"
<meph> then dumped me
#54006
Schkirpow: So the other day at the grocery store, I got a fantastic idea
Enervine: What was that?
Schkirpow: Well, I got a huge shopping cart full of stuff I needed
Schkirpow: Then hid the cart behind some of those cardboard stand things
Schkirpow: And then took 10 items at a time to the 10 item express lane
Schkirpow: And I got them bagged, put them in another hidden shopping cart
Schkirpow: Then kept going until I had paid for everything
Schkirpow: The cashier got pissed, though, and she asked me why I kept coming back to the express lane instead of going to a normal line
Enervine: hahaha, what did you say?
Schkirpow: Because I was 'in a rush'
#32952
<Monty> Question challenge #9272: what us state includes the telephone
area code 602
<azz> ibot area code 602
<iBot> i think area code 602 is Phoenix, Arizona
<Monty> Winner was iBot with the correct answer: arizona
#8405
<Prison_Shank_Blues> i found a fuckin tampax in a public pool
#3876
<Infe> damn, i hate buying a computer part, you always see a better deal the next day
<AlmtyBob> not me
<ryo-ohki> Just steal stuff, and you won't have that problem.
<Infe> but then they buy something newer and better to replace what you stole
<Infe> and you have to steal again!
#33653
* Yusuke akfjl;fdsjfdsjfsdjfdlsks
<Yusuke> damn my cat got on the comp keyboard
* Yusuke was kicked by Recon (stop Spamming!)
* Yusuke has joined #roleplay
<Yusuke> recon
<Yusuke> i did not spam
<Recon> tell your cat to stop spammin
<Yusuke> i know but recon does not have to kick me
<Shavnir> but Kicking a cat would be animal cruelty
#1850
<Shiznaught> what better kinston or micron ram
<devGOD> i like kingston
<devGOD> did you know kingston's founder is an ex-football player
<`michael> that really makes their ram better too
#13549
<Sumez> so, what's happened over the last week?
<RafaMan>
#22739
<Airlea> If I was trying to hit on you AJ, I'd just use my frying pan.
<FBMachine> woah, foreplay and cooking at the same time
#297849
<mistah_j> If you watch porn in reverse it's about a guy who vacuums jizz of a woman's face and then takes his Pizza back to work
#10185
<Mike_McCormick> how do you change your name? i tried /nick Mike but it won't work
<Mike> that's because I have that one dingleberry
#4372
<DrFurious> if midgets had regular size penises they could take pictures of themselves in a minature house and decieve people into thinking they are normal sized with a huge penis
#30609
<cdowdsux> So my friend was telling me about how he tried to commit suicide by taking 20 Advil...so I was just like.. "Dude, why take 20 Advil when you could have just taken 3 Aleve?"
#39994
<frosty-theaussie> i just brushed the dust off my desk now its floating towards in me in a big cloud
<frosty-theaussie> i think it might be sentient
#33906
<RandomSpork> know what's bad
<RandomSpork> I can cause my nose to bleed as if by will
<CyberZ74> Why, do you imagine big breasts?
<RandomSpork> no. want to know how I do it?
<CyberZ74> Nah.
<RandomSpork> first I strtch out my face in a psuedo yawn
<RandomSpork> then I blow a quick puff of air out my nose, like so....aww shit
* RandomSpork is now known as RS||BRB
<Specs> haha
<CyberZ74> ...
* RS||BRB is now known as RandomSpork
<RandomSpork> that was so NOT funny Specs
Comment: irc.esper.net #rotfw
#30298
<Ultimos> what's a fuckin troll?
<Ultimos> lol
<binkzz> url what is an internet troll
<migas> - "what is an internet troll": http://www.wikipedia.org/wiki/Internet_troll
<Ultimos> migas has saveth me.
<binkzz> migas always takes the credit ;[
#34652
<ikkenai> wtf.
<ikkenai> talking to dig dug is like meeting a celebrity
<ikkenai> only lame
Comment: #geekissues
#1735
(Dark_Fear) women and malls gotogether like warez and t3 connectiosn :)
#33785
<Mr_X> I'm bi.
<Mr_X> Bi means two chicks at the same time, right?