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#11014
<PreZ> u'd think I'd dream about britney spears, or christina ricci, or something
<PreZ> but nooooo
<PreZ> I dream I'm on IRC in #aussies
<PreZ> *sigh*
<goombah> wake up prez.. your having a hard disk crash
#299673
<@jen> help my mom get a demonoid account? damn thing wont let me give her an invite since were same ip :-(
<+Ailieron> Why don't you just let your mom use your account?
<~Fax> then her mom will know that Jen's been dl-ing yaoi again
<@jen> the last time i downloaded yaoi was when mom forced me to find brokeback mountain
#24579
<raluka> I live in Southwest Europe
<JaniceF> New Mexico?
<raluka> Southwest Europe hun
<JaniceF> Oh you mean Brazil?
<JaniceF> I know! Lichenstein?
<raluka> Spain.
#8262
<jeer> I have to move to mississippi soon..I wish I had a sister or cousin there.
<jeer> who am I going to date?
#14538
<usrg> cigarettes are carcinogenic, too
<oink2u> actually, it's the smoke that you inhale from the cigarette that's carcinogenic
<usrg> well DUH :-P
<usrg> you don't eat the damn thing!
#3902
<+Tre> how do I get girls to have sex with me?
<+sp00n> show them software you have written..woman go wild for that kind of stuff
<+Tre> for real? how should i show them? do I carry my laptop around and show random woman??
#5303
<@atarax> DrConway: Some kid told me a couple days ago "They just came out with internet 7.0"
#32729
<Mayseth> And I'm going to start carrying a sock puppet around with me.
<Dweller> good god.. there is another one like me somehwere?
<Mayseth> Whenever I excuse myself I shall place it in my chair and tell them "This is Lefty the sock puppet.. he shall rule in my stead while I am otherwise detained"
#18429
<hadeZ> you live on your own right?
...
<hadeZ> but basically you pay with yourself
<hadeZ> for yourself rather
<Fembot> you said PAY, right?
#14718
<ChlOrPh> it's rillY frustrating to wanna fuck someone who doesn't exist
#18793
<sweede> i've watched him do the following (it was on my lame p133 even) in Quake 1
<sweede> over a modem, in a hotel (28.8kps), join a server (max 50), number one player was at like, 30 or so..
<sweede> NO mouse, just keyboard,
<sweede> AND only using the nail gun,
<sweede> own3d everyone, the number one guy didnt get a frag after that..
<sweede> AND, he was typing to people as he was playing.
<setuid_w00t> beatz0rage
<Strike> sweede: and he was jerking off at the same time
<Strike> *fapfapfapfapfapfap* *frag* *fapfapfapfap* *type*
#35417
<Shenwu> hrm
<Shenwu> then, look at the top of mirc, see the row of little icons
<Shenwu> click the green icon with a /a
<Shenwu> when it opens, click the tab that says "Remotes"
<Gommba> do i need mirc to do this
<Shenwu> yes that would be good
#7038
<casss> divX runs slightly jittery on comp
<casss> is that cause of vid card?
<JtHMx> it's cuz you're gy
<sirg> but how does the codec know that?
<JtHMx> it's magic
<sirg> very cool!
* sirg is way impressed
#21423
* sleepysid is away: brb getting married
#21345
<MoonKitty> I'm on the cock patch
<DS> you mean masturbation?
<MoonKitty> call it what you like
<lowerfrenum> lol
<DS> for that, i will fire up bash
#229
<iMike> i remember every time i closed my eyes
<iMike> id see your penis
<iMike> it was great
<iMike> i mean disgusting.
#306
<NtG> people beta test a MS product every time they boot windows
#16923
<MrPuppy> like 3 hours ago
<MrPuppy> i was wankin to porn and i just got up
<MrPuppy> my door was open and my parents have been walkin around
<MrPuppy> they prolly saw me
<MrPuppy> i heard them laughing
#14755
<morbid> shh we are sleeping.
<myn> morbid you awake?
#1864
<ToastyGhost> Yo.
* Brentai joyously rapes ToastyGhost.
* ToastyGhost enjoys it also.
<Defcon> Toasty you fuck.
<ToastyGhost> No, Brentai did. I just stood there.
#309205
< radiofree> around the time the UK was planning to introduce id cards, i was walking down the high street and some hippy handed me a flyer "NO2ID", a campaign group opposed to government id cards, stating things like privacy etc...
< radiofree> at the bottom it said "Join our facebook group"
#305467
< ArtForz> work is failure to efficiently procrastinate.
#3752
<ChewToy> hrm... my girlfriend should be getting off work soon
<ChewToy> i should get really really stoned before she gets here
<spazzer> actually
<spazzer> chew
<spazzer> i got off your girlfriend this afternoon first
<ChewToy> spazzer she's fucking hot :)
<ChewToy> she puts out!
<spazzer> hence, i said i got off of her first
<ChewToy> she sucks good dick doesnt she?
<spazzer> i was getting close, and she told me to put my finger in her ass
<ChewToy> she's a manager at a victorias secret
<ChewToy> :>
* KNG_SNK wonders how chew scored that
<dazemobil> he ordered her in the catalog =o
#32692
* Idiot has quit IRC
<ChineseElite`> that'll be the day...
#56166
<Darien> I love my job
<Darien> I saw a coworker trying to figure out how to make his chair lean back
<Darien> he was on the ground looking at the bottom of it
<Darien> we talk about the chairs for a minute or so
<Darien> then he puts on his headset, hits a button on his phone, and says 'Sorry ma'am, thanks for holding.'