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#46473
*** X___ has joined #invest
<X___> omg! i got these hot pics of my older sister nude last night!
<br0ker> This is #invest...
<br0ker> "C" and "V" are adjacent.
#20192
<WC|spieler> Installing photoshop from within a compressed archive.
<WC|spieler> with my antivirus active
<WC|spieler> this ought to turn out well.
<WC|spieler> sometime next summer
#28800
<gixxerca> Read Romans 1:26-32 to learn more about same sex relationships.
<DNAspark99> ummmm, no. fuck that. go out an be GAY yourself, if you REALLY want to learn more about same-sex relationships.
<gixxerca> Please spare 2 minutes of reading to learn the truth?
<DNAspark99> "truth" found in the bible?
#18551
<@OlDirtyB> YOU NEED A GLASS OF STFU
<Splash> can you actually put that in a glass?
#308292
<%K-man> Simmml: there's a saying... "It's pointless to alt-tab porn... if your other window is also porn..." :P
<Simmml> hehe That's the problem ;P
<Simmml> What works too is just switching the screen off.... or locking the door... or getting your own apartment...
<Simmml> although closing windows and tabs will not help much I think considering that you're still sitting infront of your pc without pants on? ;)
<%K-man> ahhh.. yes... the single hardest choice every young boy eventually has to make in his life.... hide the porn or hide the penis....
<Simmml> cruel world ;P
<%K-man> at that point, you learn the art of "fap shui".. the art of rearranging your room so that you don't have to hide anything if anyone bursts is.
<%K-man> it's a legit ancient art I swear...
<%K-man> perfected by horny ninjas...
#55243
<Foxhill> shagging someone who dont move is like humping a warm vibrator that doesnt vibrate and farts in its sleep
#38820
<+cwd> in my server here since there are lots of HDs and fans, all the vibrations in the case are causing power connectors to slip just enough to power off the drive
<+cwd> so every 2-3 days i have to open it and readjust
<+cwd> its pretty fucking gay
< war-> cwd do you have a gf?
<+cwd> of course not
#66
<noppa> weed: (dont inhale and you will become the next president!!!!!)
#51
<UncleJed> the government should split up efnet
<UncleJed> not that efnet doesn't split enough as it is
#39441
<RadMhetoric> Bittorrent is the best thing ever.
<RedParatroopa> Is that a Pokemon?
Comment: studio64.yi.org, #tmk
#8120
<DisposableHero> is semen conductive?
<Iceman> DisposableHero: yes
<DisposableHero> (Iceman): fuck
#2244
<Asmodee`> ibm said they were investing 1 billion $ into open source projects
<DAL9000> Asmodee`: do you know what happens when you invest money in opensource projects?
<DAL9000> NOTHING! it buys the coders some beer, nachos, and porn to watch instead of coding.
#959
(Atarax) DrConway: They also had such a poorly designed network that I set my computer's IP to the IP of their gateway and took the entire college network down
#15184
(Pulse): did u know it was part of dayly life in egypt to wank
(cypheh): its part of my daily life too
(Pulse): aye
(senn): same
#10510
<quatoria> it was high-larious
<Acheron> wait...you mean you were high at the time and thought it was
funny?
<hep> high "at the time?"
<hep> this implies a state of non-highness at some point
<hep> :>
#1314
<Tektrnica> i got roller blades
<Tektrnica> they have orange on them tho :P
<Tektrnica> fawking raverblades
#6393
<NyseriA> i just read a book i got for xmas
<NyseriA> its about a sea harrier pilot shot down in bosnia
<NyseriA> he is collected by a troops of SAS FACs
<NyseriA> and, let me recall, when they have to pull out he says...
<NyseriA> He smacks his SA80 down on the tabke
<NyseriA> and shouts
<Sureshot^> 'who fucking TKed me last round?'
#7028
<Conskill> That kinda gun brings out the raving gun loving American in us all.
<The_Tick> Over and under shotgun. Three throwing knives. The ability to hide.
<Rain> yeah, seriously.
<Rain> The_tick - Huh?
<The_Tick> That's all you need.
<The_Tick> And it's cheeeep.
<Twinkcide> Rain: The bullets are embedded in cakes of propellant instead of casings. It was designed to overcome the problem of recoil pushing the barrel off target while firing in bursts
<Twinkcide> Has an insane ROF while in 3-round burst mode, and no recoil until the third round has left the barrel
<Pander> Tick: That won't kill a velociraptor.
<The_Tick> On the other hand, I'd sleep with that thing if I had one.
<Pander> I base all gun purchases on "Will this kill a velociraptor?"
#6576
<NMO> Instuructions to format: rip out hard drive, tie to back of car, drive on shit road, harddrive gone
#8755
<radead> (number of slashdot posts x ultima online character level)^(number of dime sized zits on face)/(girlfriends had before + 1) = sizeOf(nerd)
<radead> girlfriends had before + 1 so we don't get a divide by zero error
#33360
<eslice> my little brother is failing english
<eslice> does the dumbass want to stay back?
<Blingo`> is this a trick question?
Comment: #GeekIssues on EFNet
#28524
<cSk|Sperry> There were 2 people on a boat: /hop and /quit. /hop got off, who's still on the boat?
* nipple_frog has quit IRC
#16431
<Danelope> "Nine people in total have had gene therapy at the Necker Hospital, and seven of them are doing well."
<Danelope> The other two transformed into hideous demon-beasts and began slaying the hospital staff.
<Danelope> And eating their brains.
#35570
<tharaka> wow, this is a new one...
<tharaka> microsoft connected to its ONLINE troubleshooting centre
<tharaka> only to tell me, "You Do Not Currently Have A Connection To The Internet"
<ducklord> they're making fun of you
<tharaka> is coz i is bleck
<ducklord> probably
<ducklord> they're trying to get you to destroy your computer in a murderous black rage
<ducklord> and/or pawn it
#301012
<gloomp> isaacx, I have a challenge for you!
<isaacx> what?
<gloomp> Try going ten lines without using a question mark!
<isaacx> my lines?
<isaacx> or in total?