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#13077
corner (19:08:21): how tall is a standard guillotine?
Andrick (19:08:33): This still concerns you?
corner (19:08:39): yeah, I really want to build one
corner (19:08:47): I have short ceilings
corner (19:08:51): I wanna make sure I can keep it in my apt
Andrick (19:09:00): I have to admit that I never have committed that number to memory.
Andrick (19:09:06): But I can tell you they are *tall*.
corner (19:09:15): maybe I can make a kid's version?
Andrick (19:09:30): That is probably a wonderfully poor choice of words.
#246970
<zach[w]> You know, I really think the phrase "Wookiees can load their bowcasters with both standard and explosive-tipped quarrels.[citation needed]" is a perfect description of Wikipedia.
#133746
<mr_flea> you know you're too used to working in a shell when you try to tab-complete your password.
Comment: #decorum on freenode
#6482
<funknut> I like my women like I like my coffee.
<Dokterrock> What, tied up in a sack and thrown over the back of a burro?
#2802
<[_pitch_]> florida is shaped like a big droopy dick for a reason...
#29166
<BoZmAn20> Goddamnit, my ex girlfriend has such horrible taste in men
<BoZmAn20> wait
<BoZmAn20> Shit.
#17023
<+TlMMAH> hey gary
<+TlMMAH> what is porno that i should download
<+TlMMAH> i am putting my dick into your hands here
<+TlMMAH> not literally but, you know
#8130
* Beryllium probably should go back to coding PHP
<Beryllium> I hope my site doesn't have any wide-open gaping back doors ...
<Beryllium> ... you know, like www.goatse.cx ...
* Beryllium runs VERY FAR AWAY
<spacefem> Beryllium: awe, that's fun though...
<Beryllium> spacefem: Which part?
<spacefem> making unsuspecting people go to goatse.cx!
<Beryllium> I did that for my GF once ...
<Beryllium> (Ex-gf ;-)
#5417
<Yusaku> "God dammit mom, why the fuck did you buy me an xbox?" "What, how can you tell?" "Well, that present under the Christmas tree is either a coffee table, or an xbox...I'm hoping it's a coffee table."
#16431
<Danelope> "Nine people in total have had gene therapy at the Necker Hospital, and seven of them are doing well."
<Danelope> The other two transformed into hideous demon-beasts and began slaying the hospital staff.
<Danelope> And eating their brains.
#2160
<TheMyst> hey, anyone here use a radar detector?
<Customz> yes why myst?
<Customz> i only use it so i know when to stash the blunt
<Customz> fuck speeding
#305711
* fantasyprone (fantasypro@hide-3089BE47.static.tpgi.com.au) Quit (Ping timeout)
* Apathy runs off to sleep
<Apathy> also tell fantasyprone i said "saw that coming!"
<snark> future fantasyprone says to tell you she saw your mom coming last night
<snark> I have a time machine
<snark> and will pass on your message to avoid a paradox
* fantasyprone (fantasypro@hide-3089BE47.static.tpgi.com.au) has joined #elitists
<snark> fantasyprone: Apathy said to tell you he saw that coming
<fantasyprone> if you see Apathy again, you can tell him I saw his mom coming
<snark> Will do.
* snark hops in a time machine and jumps back a couple of minutes
* snark emerges from the time machine again.
<snark> All done.
<fantasyprone> thanks
#1021
(Goemon) Is it possible to just plug a like 1GHz processor into your computer?
#31906
< zYgoat> i want to start a company selling human milk
< andyfied> look at their little faces
< zYgoat> i think it'd be hilarious
< zYgoat> hire women
< zYgoat> hook up the suction cups
< zYgoat> then have them do telemarketing work while the tubes suck their teats
< andyfied> suddenly this channel is bash-worthy
< zYgoat> see i should be making money with this instead of chatting
< zYgoat> hell
< andyfied> go for it
< zYgoat> i could sell the video footage
< zYgoat> earn three ways
< andyfied> yeah, best. plan. ever.
17:24 <@Scoth> I'm sure there's someone out there who'd buy it :)
#13753
<Flirbnic> I have a time machine.
<Twilo> That's your fridge
<Flirbnic> Then explain how I can put perishable food items in there and take them out several days later STILL FRESH?
#128138
<Options> well, guess my parents dont want me playing phoenix wright in the house anymore :(
<Sylon[DMS]|Around> throw your DS in their face and yell OBJECTION!
<Options> that is....AN AWESOME IDEA
#1089
(kellai) fr0g is cuddly
(kellai) except for when he tried to light me on fire
#10893
<octal> i think meeting lots of cute/etc. girls is easier if you're deaf and thus can tolerate raves.
#35161
<withnail> i could tell the relationship was coming to an end because i started backing up all my mp3s onto cd's
Comment: #geekissues
#20807
<DocGonzo> heh, you know you do too much dvd ripping when you half expect that if you turn your head really fast you'll see macroblocks
#36443
(Deranged): I was watching this thing on the discovery channel about the mating rituals of whales. Did you know that the male whale shoots out 400 gallons of sperm during an ejaculation? But only 250 gallons of that actually go inside the female. So that means, 150 gallons of sperm just float around in the ocean everytime a whale blows his load. Kinda makes you wonder if that's what makes the water so salty....
(Mayseth): I've drank sea water by mistake you know. I don't need to know this now!
(Deranged): HAHAHAHA
——> (Deranged) has quit IRC (Kill by Mayseth (I hate you.)).
#59016
<FuriKuri> How do I turn off those stupid red lines in Microsoft Word?
<Chu> Type correctly?
Comment: #nintendo @ irc.chatspike.net
#7766
*** booger is now known as BROADCAST
* BROADCAST MESSAGE FROM ETG OPS: we all suck here tonight, so we are going to bounce chanserv a few times then disco ky-hub-1.etg.sucks.com and force a few netsplits on zaire-congo-hub-gw.etg.africa.org just because - vd whiz
#258093
<The Alchemist> you know
<The Alchemist> wow have been useful for me
<The Alchemist> from time to time, as a wannabe game developer, i feel this urge to make a online game
<The Alchemist> then i check the wow comunity
<The Alchemist> and then i see that if one day i make a online game, will have to deal with those same retards, and the urge goes away
#8732
<LordBlink> i once made out with a picture of the sorceress
<LordBlink> does that make me lame?