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#229818
<chicane> Sex And The City EXTENDED DVDRip XviD-BeStDivX
<chicane> sigh
<chicane> another release
<Atrius> I already thought that sarah jessica parker's nose was extended enough
#139339
<Iced_Plasma> I was at work at the retirement community
<Iced_Plasma> and some old guy is talking to me about religion
<Iced_Plasma> and he looks aty me and says
<Iced_Plasma> "When do you think Jesus will come?"
<Iced_Plasma> and I said
<Iced_Plasma> "When he climaxes"
<Iced_Plasma> and he just stared at me in shock and rage
#44701
<usu_> Well, for the past weeks, Bush's approval rating has consistently been well below 50%.
<usu_> And you all know what that means, right?
<usu_> To put it in perspective, it means that if he were a quote on QDB, his score would be below 0.
<usu_> Huzzah!
#60524
Jane: Random question for you.
Harald387: Random answer for you.
Jane: WoW - Rogue or Mage for highest DPS?
Harald387: HOONGA OONGA OOGA CHAKA
#14850
(@HS): yes, i was around a very powerfull political figure, and all i could think about was banging his daughter
#34672
<DrYvOutCM> man i know it was a terrorist act and all
<DrYvOutCM> and it was horrible
<DrYvOutCM> but ya gotta admit
<DrYvOutCM> it was pretty impressive
<DrYvOutCM> those were some huge ass buildings
<_Zippo^_> DrYvOutCM: Well done! You just now realised that "Things Blowing Up" is cool. Welcome to, well, whenever humans first invented explosives.
#299002
Riomerc: The only problem with it is that it's an eco-smart community
Riomerc: And anything with the words "Ecological", "Green" or "Environmentalist" and any combination and permutation therein, plus the word "Smart" "Intelligent" or "Friendly" and any comination or permutation therein makes me want to extract my eyes from their orbits with a rusted spork, rape them, and then stick my dick in an oven and slam the door on it until it either burns to a crisp, gets so much damage that it falls off or I black out from pain.
PaperStrike: D:
Riomerc: And, of course, it would be a low-star-rated oven, so I could put a dent in their bullshit whilst I'm mutiliating myself.
#307633
<Aberrant> I found out why my brother dropped off the face of the internet
<Aberrant> he rage quit TF2 by taking a pair of scissors to all the cables in his PC
<Aberrant> then to the motherboard
#25114
<@[TeMpEsT]> ok, let me get this straight. you called me a power bitch, tried to ping me off line, went around asking for the chanserv password, and then tried to evade a ban. and now you want me to op you and your damn bot so you can try to take over the channel?
<|TheRaR|> no, you only need to op the bot
<mazrim> oh, you stupid stupid fuck.
#39539
<Tenor> how do i make z00m join/part channels?
<DrunkDwarf> by winking at him twice, lick your lips once, then shake your hips three times, and he shall obey
<DrunkDwarf> seriously
* Tenor winks at z00m
* Tenor winks at z00m
* Tenor licks his lips at z00m
* Tenor shakes his hips at z00m
* Tenor shakes his hips at z00m
* Tenor shakes his hips at z00m
<z00m> YEAH BABY
<z00m> IM YOURS
Comment: z00m is a bot
#305221
<sdmkun> tar -xzf merc.tgz what the fuck
<sdmkun> how the fuck do you people remember this shit
<bucketmouse> just think with a german accent
<bucketmouse> XTRACT ZE FILES
#6155
<Mooglez> the lack of intelligent and cultured converstaion bores me
<Mooglez> laterz bitchez
#309357
<Sorts> Mind. Blown.
<pooryoric> ...What a charmingly tiny explosion. :P
#16587
<I am Budwin>I found the meaning of life. . . And I can download it too!!!
<Revica4000>. . . . . . .
#79712
< nixternal> hey, I have Office 2007 Enterprise free, who wants it?
< Red_Herring> ME ME ME ME ME
< nixternal> for real?
< Red_Herring> no
< nixternal> why not?
< Red_Herring> a) i dont use windows
< Red_Herring> b) i dont use office
< nixternal> you passed the test!
< Red_Herring> what do i win?
< nixternal> Office 2007 Enterprise
Comment: #ubuntu-chicago
#8578
<cheesecake> differential equations sedate me.
<kg> strange... i usually get turned on by differential equations..
#30978
<Kaelic> What would you buy for a woman?
<Raven> hmm?
<Raven> Me? For a woman?
<Raven> well
<Raven> I can come up with two possible answers cause I am clueless in the subject... either something common like flowers, or, well, new netcard or 512 Mb memory stick :>
<Kaelic> I doubt she would be too thrilled to get a new 512mb mem stick, "just to say I love you" :p
<OWK> "I love you so much 512mb could not hold the words..."
#44863
<+Sprunk> I think the world should be run by a panel of scientists and kindergarten teachers
<+Sprunk> scientists know all the facts and kindergarten teachers know how to treat everyone fairly
#8735
<arfmcbarf> i'm gonna teach you a lesson you wont soon forget
<arfmcbarf> i.e., how to integrate ln x from 0 to infinity
<arfmcbarf> first you get the antiderivitive
<arfmcbarf> of ln(x)
<arfmcbarf> i.e., 1/x
<arfmcbarf> then i forget the rest
#301836
<@PZT> "I want you to taste these," she panted as she unbuttoned her blouse, revealing two full-grown California grizzly bears. I was on the ground before it even clicked. I glanced upwards and wove my head to the left as a set of 2" claws plunged downward at me. They grazed the side of my face. It stung like hell. One of them was sitting on my left arm; I couldn't move. I felt around for the coat hanger she'd thrown to the floor just minutes ago. A careless move for an agent, I thought to myself. I twisted it around my wrist, forming a crude hook, and jabbed at the one on top of me. It rolled over, uttering primal groans of agony as blood dripped from its eyes. I slashed blindly to my left. I didn't break the fur, but it was enough. The second bear shifted its weight, and I was able to pry my arm free. Still half-naked, I grabbed the padlocked Armani suitcase and I stumbled out the motel room door.
<Scizor300> What the hell?
* Stoney is now known as Stonaway
<@PZT> I swore silently to myself as I dashed toward the dimly lit lobby. She'd been one of them all along. An agent. The Movement had warned me not to let down my cover, even for a minute. Why hadn't I listened? A prostitute, in the beat-down slums of Madrid? What was I thinking? Her name... Bertha. Bear-tha. She'd been dangling it in front of my face the entire night, but I had been too horny to listen. Or care, for that matter.
<+Mach> What the fuck?
<@PZT> I burst out the front door and ran down the street towards a departing bus. I didn't care where it was going; no human can outrun a hungry grizzly bear on foot. I heard screams behind me, followed by roars and a horrible gnashing sound. I stuck my good arm between the closing doors, pried them open and stepped on board. I threw a few coins at the flabbergasted bus driver and made my way to a seat, ignoring the similarly confused faces around me. It didn't matter to me; the honey was safe. That was all that mattered nowadays.
Comment: #armonte's_channel on irc.esper.net
#43832
<gaurav> you're a bit of a comedian
<thame^> you're a megabyte of a fag
Comment: #mircscripts.org Undernet
#51913
<Neon> Well, there's a surefire boner-killer. Watching porn on Windows Media Player and realizing that you have the MSN music plugin enabled, showing the girl you'd like to ask out soon the title of what you're watching.
#12175
<TC|crapping> I AM HOMOSEXUAL AND SHOULDN'T LEAVE MY STUPID GAME LOGGED IN WHEN I GO TO THE RESTROOM.
<TC|crapping> Love, TC's wife.
#40080
<Luigi30> all commercials with women in them are the following:
<Luigi30> A) arthritis
<Luigi30> B) vaginal cream
<Luigi30> or C) weight-loss steroids
<mindspillage> D) Adult diapers.
<Austin> Don't forget feminine hygiene products.
* tinfoil (~tin@h0050180208a5.ne.client2.attbi.com) has joined #wikipedia
<Luigi30> I like making pottery
<Luigi30> that's why I use CLITORIS BRAND VAGINAL CREAM
* tinfoil (~tin@h0050180208a5.ne.client2.attbi.com) has left #wikipedia
Comment: #wikipedia
#18386
<Nate`> i am a l33t script0r
<DaveMan|l33t> you do realize that autorejoin is a checkbox in mirc, right?
<Nate`> its is
<Nate`> damnit all