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#117933
<+MMDE> i was supposed to scare my lil bro who was lying in the bed in the dark
<+MMDE> but it was my mom... and i placed my hands on both her tits
<+MMDE> she didnt have on anything
<+MMDE> they're hot
<+Yumichika> u make me feel normal MMDE
Comment: irc.p2p-network.net/#demonoid

#76331
Truespin: So ya'll know how i work with an advertising firm right?  Well today i was put on company probation... if i so much as steal a paperclip, im fired and charges are being pressed against me.
Truespin: We had a meeting today, with ideas for a "reverse racism" campaign for the local highschool.  They asked for us to all brainstorm, and i had this brilliant stroke of genius.
Truespin: I held up a note pad with the following poster idea:
Reverse Racism, promote equality
reggin   edaps  cips  oobaggij  gongin  yeknom-hcrop
knihc  iloom  ekyk  sgorf  rethgif-thgin
Truespin: I thought it was brilliant... apparently the senior executive didnt.  He actually walked over, slapped me, and told me to get the fuck out of the office before he kicked my ass (he was black btw)
Truespin:  So needless to say, im not going to think outside the box any time soon...

#8458
<Punk-In-Drublic> THE FOLLOWING PEOPLE SUCK COCK ...Mousey, Dave, Vas, Belindah..........YALL CAN GAT FUCKED COS IM DRUNK WOOOOOOOOO ......BOOBIES WOOOOOOOOOO'
<Mousey> why am i first
<Mousey> thats really insulting
<vas-deferens> because your the best at iut
<mk4> why am i second ?
<vas-deferens> shit im third
<vas-deferens> i better work on my technique
<vas-deferens> at least im beating a chick
<Mousey> hahahah

#301243
[nickeax] If you could be any monarch, which would you choose?
[Hex] batman
[robzy] batman

#60175
<NIM^Outithj> I parked the car and turned to her, by the time I turned my head her shirt was already half off
<NIM^Outithj> And she was like Touch my breast
<NIM^Outithj> I was like what?
<NIM^Outithj> She was like Touch my tits
<NIM^Outithj> so I started the car and drove her home
<Malawar> ...
<[JS]-nowhere> well that was anti-climatic
<NIM^Outithj> Once I started driving home she started on this complex like 'WTF, IS THERE SOMETHING WRONG WITH ME? IS THERE SOMETHING WRONG WITH MY TITS? OMG THERES SOMETHING WRONG WITH ME ISN'T THERE... ETC...'
<NIM^Outithj> So to shut her up, I reached over and grabbed one, and sweezed it twice, and on each squeeze I made the hook sound skeeter from that cartoon doug used to make
<NIM^Outithj> then put both hands back on the wheel like nothing had just happened :p
Comment: #empiresmod / gamesurge

#16363
<Paulo> What KOF babe has the sexiest navel?
<Angelblade> Is the navel where your thing-thing is supposed to go?
<K9999> YOUR THING-THING CAN'T GO INTO A NAVEL! Although it might be an intriguing experience...
<MilleniumWEAPON> Your... thing-thing??? Though it does not go into the navel too well, I could recommend some "educational" sites as to where you put your thing-thing, but I'd get banned...

#7224
***  mrBlond changes topic to "Open party at Minko's, All welcome. Place for 500"
<Minko> grrrr
<Minko> You can all come, but I'm not gonna be there
*** mrBlond changes topic to "Open party at Minko's  <Minko> You can all come"
<Minko> Stop it guys, I'm busy this weekend
<Minko> I've got big things planned
*** mrBlond changes topic to "Open party at Minko's  <Minko> You can all come <Minko> I've got big things planned"
<Minko> Aaargh

#29490
<Michael> !seen my cock
<MonkeyBot> Sorry Michael, I haven't seen your cock around

#258726
<AtoB> I needed an extra xp cd, so i downloaded one and formatted my computer. When i was about to reinstall, i found out that i had forgot to burn the cd...

#5985
<Foggi> french are good for 2 things
<Foggi> art
<Foggi> and surrendering

#11225
* pygmy fires up excel
[@pygmy] or not
[@pygmy] I'd need it installed to do that :)

#468
"Documentation is like sex: when it is good, it is very, very good;
and when it is bad, it is better than nothing."
- Dick Brandon

#2104
<Tim_K> last time I jumped into a convertible.. I nearly got but-fucked by the gear shifter..

#22984
<DigitlDud> which button here calls your parents to pick you up?

#241
<SWM> if the average penis is 6"
<SWM> and the average pussy is 8" deep that means there''s about 2 miles of unused pussy in like New York

#37550
<dooky> oh and get a bucket of paint and slop it all over her car
<MSIGuy> Yeah.
<Stonefish> dooky: Glue it on the hood, like a Mack Truck bulldog
<Inept> Crazy glue the dildo onto her hood where the hood ornament should be.
<dooky> gluing the dildo do the windshield was a good idea
Comment: who needs keys when you have a dildo and epoxy

#310978
<!spaghetti> What's that thing deaf people have
< FrobtheBuilder> peace and quiet?

#31301
<+Biggs`> eek
<+Biggs`> according to kWeather, it's raining
* +Biggs` looks outside
<+Biggs`> IT DOES NOT LIE!!

#311440
< hydrocat> Hello, I need some insight on asyncio's run_forever()
< o11c> hydrocat: if it is correctly named, it is a limited solution for the halting problem

#16779
<Kevyn> So if black guys like white girls, and white guys like asian girls... what do the asian guys like?
<etoilet> hentai

#301526
<ProtoTom> just saw avatar
<ProtoTom> so James Cameron basicaly spent 500 mil to depict a love story between a 15 foot blue woman and a cripple
<jefHardy> it's a progress...last time he spent 200 mil to depict a love story between an iceberg and a big boat

#245012
<Ailure> what is divisible by zero?
<blackhole89> a miserable little pile of exceptions

#4877
<cade> zzz, you wanna kill yourself or something?
<zZz-> cade, I've attempted so many times and failed, it's not even funny..
<zZz-> Accually, it is kinda funny.

#34693
<Fragas> did u have fun at the deb party mr hinton?
<Hinton> yer
<Hinton> the afterparty was shit tho
<Hinton> a bunch of greasy wogs playing doof doof till 5am
<Fragas> lol.......maybe im naive, but whats doof doof?
<Hinton> techno
<Fragas> oh......ooooooooooh
<Fragas> i thought it was a sex game

#8502
<Doc> hmm.. AOL has this great new thing where you can chat with your friends online!
<Bru> yeah I saw the ad on TV. that would be cool - then I wouldn't have to chat with this bunch of losers and social misfits

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