Random | Latest | Best | Full Site
#296104
Forggy: my kitten is almost cat sized now
CorbinFox: uh oh, better put it in the freezer then. the cold makes things contract
CorbinFox: that way you can keep it as a kitten forever!
Forggy: you can't play with my kitten anymore ok?
CorbinFox aw :(
#7519
<[Matt]> the only thing about mullholland drive that didn't confuse me entirely was the lesbian sex scenes
<[Matt]> other than that, i was lost
#28994
<Aokromes> what HOTTT
<Aokromes> 102 °F / 39 °C
<[Piratez]> no idea what temp it is outside here
<[Piratez]> but it aint hot
<[Piratez]> no chicks are out
#2378
(rageboy) ok let me give you a hypothetical situation
(rageboy) and you tell me if you would be mad
(rageboy) you are having a house party..
(rageboy) and you come home.. everyone is still partying
(rageboy) and one of your friends is having sex on your bathroom sink
(rageboy) would you kick him outta your house?
(vrs) is he a good friend
(vrs) ?
(rageboy) yeah
(vrs) do you like the girl?
(rageboy) no no..
(rageboy) i was the one fucking
#301224
<Arang> I hate when I have to turn off a computer by holding the power button
<Arang> it just feels way too visceral
<Arang> like I'm holding a pillow over its head
<Arang> "ARANG WHYYYGHGHGHBLGBHGBL"
<Arang> "mfff mfffffff"
<Fax> *windows sound*
#45386
tedger> today.... the galaxy was not saved
tedger> but I did get to level 20
tedger> so like 20% of it was saved
tedger> lets say that Earth was in that 20%
#2094
<Miss_RPM> they used to say i was named after some chick dad saw in a dirty magazine..
#58450
<Jamie_M> my first concussion was from a giant black guy hurling me across the room
<Jamie_M> note to you all: Dont play power rangers with giant black guys
#16745
{DingoVolf} is that a hermaphroditic swami under your left fender or are you just glad to be a designer of prosthetic foreheads?
#33076
<Hatter> I barely drink anymore :/
<J3anyus> that's good.
<J3anyus> i've cut down on my drinking a LOT
<J3anyus> ever since my last tequila incident.
<Hatter> I used to love tequila
<J3anyus> i love taking tequila shots
<J3anyus> i just hate the after effects :P
<richardgr> last time hatter was drunk
<richardgr> let me get it one sec
<Hatter> .,..
<richardgr> <Hatter> life is a poo poo im on my way!
<Hatter> yeah I remember thaT
Comment: #ramen on EFNet
#297646
[Leshok] "having sex is like making fractions, its improper when the larger ones on top"
[&quazy] but how else would they reach a whole
#44533
<@Rjx> just to be clear, there's absolutely zero chance of me cheating on sara
<<FlaVouR> is sara your new laptop?
Comment: #geekissues
#303802
<Pryoidain> Meh, nothing interesting, just another day of me being a complete asshole to unsuspecting citizens
<Pryoidain> A legitimate, honest to god, door to door vacuum salesman came up at the best time.
<Pryoidain> I was vacuuming the rug behing the front door, and he comes up and knocks on it, so I check the peephole
<Pryoidain> It's pretty obvious what you're selling when you're holding a vacuum in one hand.
<Pryoidain> anyways we have one of those canister vacuums where the head pops off so you can attach shit to it for like sucking the fur off your dog or something more productive
<Pryoidain> I pop the head off, and open the door up just enough to where he can see me, but not the vacuum head in my hand.
<Pryoidain> I let him do his little speech, then asked to see his "Papers" to which he produced a sales paper.
<Pryoidain> He went to hand me the paper, I clicked on the vacuum, sucked it clean out of his hand, and slammed the door in his face.
<Pryoidain> Now, I could only experience the look of confusion through the peephole, but he stood out there confused for a good 3-4 minutes before deciding against knocking.
<Pryoidain> He had a few false starts, but never followed through. I think he was worried about what might happen next.
#11784
<Dunrick> My iq is 20/20
#29479
Plex: Mom just called to tell me she?s coming home now
Plex: What am I supposed to say to that? ?thanks for letting me know, I'll finish jacking off now"
* Plex is now away: Busy
#550
<Ash> KIEV, Ukraine (AP) -- A Ukrainian candy company has begun marketing what may be the stickiest, richest and most fattening holiday treat on the market: pure pork fat covered in chocolate.
#303315
<Griff> vuvuzela's are like children.. they can be annoying as hell until you have your own one
<Foulwynd> and then blow it..
Comment: #worldofraids
#71255
<WarHawk> guys can someone give me some tips for girls?
<WarHawk> im just so shy that i just start talking in here rather than to them after school
* Siege sets mode: +b *!*@ZiRC-80795AC0.sttlwa.dsl-w.verizon.net
* WarHawk was kicked by Siege (problem solved. thank me later.)
Comment: irc.zirc.org #flames
#25121
<sab0tage> who thinks an Imperial Star Destroyer could take a borg cube?
*** sab0tage was kicked by Q (You are BANNED from this channel.)
#11154
<Tridon> hate cold water
* Tridon left the shower in a huff!
<Iksion> tridon ah your willy has shrinked in cold water?
<Tridon> this morning I had to talk him down, just so that I could take a piss... Now he's not even there any longer
#38075
[n17ikh] olympics?
[n17ikh] what's that?
[n17ikh] is that like the CS tournament?
[Malpine] Yah but you can't kill anyone.
[Schizo] yeah, and the koreans don't win as much
Comment: irc.zirc.org
#609
n e r d b 5: DUDE
n e r d b 5: shania twain is only 20 years older than me.... i might have a chance one day, since she isnt that much older than me
#50571
<GenericLoser> We recieved our Red Ribbon Week wristbands yesterday.
<GenericLoser> (Red Ribbon Week has long past.)
<GenericLoser> Our instructor said, "You should probably wear these anyway."
<GenericLoser> Making a joke, I replied, "Yeah, just because Red Ribbon Weeks is over, that doesn't mean you can start doing drugs again."
<GenericLoser> And our instructor replies, very serious, "Yeah, my goal is to stay off for a month."
#3591
<Slant> ....
<FutabaAoi> i see your ... and raise you ..
<FutabaAoi> !
<Slant> four baby.
* Slant shoots FutabaAoi for cheating at the '.' table.
#5543
<andy> moo spelled backwards is moo
<andy> no wait