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#59744
<Knightmare> Well that was a night of fear and terror.
<Timork> ?
<Knightmare> I bought a bag of mushrooms and a bottle of Everclear.
<Knightmare> Settled down for a nice evening of mind altering psychadelia
<Timork> Bad trip huh?
<Knightmare> Horrible, I never want to go through it again.
<Knightmare> Somewhere along the line I installed emacs.
#309463
<Rays0re> i caught myself a beetle
<Rays0re> he's in my hand
<Rays0re> what should i name him?
<Deepy> If you got a tight grip, name him Beetlejuice
#20158
<repp> Why is the internet sucking so much today!!
<danm> repp: because it hates you?
<repp> that's IT! I've had ONE TOO MANY DISCONNECTIONS! Imma get my gun and teach that in'net a thang or 2
#17298
<xenothrope> WHO IS THE MOST TALENTED PRON STAR?!?!
<hoho> ron jeremy
<[H]Lasuuco> me
<[H]Lasuuco> i can wack off on command
<xenothrope> peter north owns jeremy
<hoho> nah
<isajeep> ummm
<[H]Lasuuco> lol
<isajeep> im not prepared to argue the better parts of male porn stars
<NickBlasta> dont lie jeep
<hoho> jeep, im going by the fact that the guy is fat, ugly, and old but still gets laid every day.
<isajeep> I said im not prepared...I don't have my slides ready
<xenothrope> lmao jeep
<isajeep> hoho thats because he(like me) has mastered his body
<NickBlasta> ROFL
<isajeep> wait
<hoho> so you're fat and ugly like him?
<isajeep> that might sund wrong
<isajeep> *sound
#1049
(s|urpee) haha yuh me hakz0r the university gibson
(s|urpee) one day
(s|urpee) I was like hakz0ring it and stuff
(s|urpee) and I was like emailing support@cc and shit
(s|urpee) and then he emailed me back and told me to notify the lab guy that the comp next to me needed rebooting
#17346
<harb> I'm good at designing things, usually.
<harb> Implemting is another matter. :|
<harb> Implementing. blah.
<homeslice> Spelling also poses a problem.
#50582
<zuri> They sell older versions of their antivirus in Spanish, that's why I use the one in English (well, it's not even for me, it's for my mom, I use Linux)
<stilist> sure you use linux... that's like saying you're buying a dildo `for a friend' ;)
#295258
ressedue: my boss told me yesterday... "I can't believe you told lashunda to not smile because it would mess the white balance up" ;D
#45563
<TheHeadlinesRead> hey guys who wants 2 cyber???
<FacadeofTime> Why do you want to cyber?
<FacadeofTime> Do you have a low self worth?
<FacadeofTime> Why cant you meet someone nice in real life?
<FacadeofTime> Do you think you're ugly?
<Vide0GameFreak64> No, everyone else does.
#193445
<@pomo|wii> So, funny story. I don't know if it's true or not, but according to my public speaking professor, it is.
<@pomo|wii> So, a few people decide to throw a party and decide to inflate a few blow-up dolls with helium to have floating around the house.
<@pomo|wii> Now, everything's going well, until apparently some of these dolls escape into the night sky via an open door/window/something
<@pomo|wii> According to what he told us, a woman a few blocks down saw these dolls and thought that the rapture was occuring, and people were floating away into heaven
<@pomo|wii> so this woman RUNS INTO THE STREET, screaming to be taken with them, only to be hit and killed by a car
#20140
<gbp> er det noen som har Silence Of The Lambs
<dortch> i have silence of the lambs
<dortch> but i dont know what the fuck you just said
#43486
(Smith) If you would like to kick someone from this chat room for whatever reason, you can by typing "/quit kick namehere reason" without the " " marks. Ex: /quit kick bob being stupid and annoying
• Quits: sl4yer (Morph6445@9CE85.827C4E.1FB30D20.IP) [QUIT: Smith idiot]
• Quits: Children_Of_Bodom (Morph5799@20E928.899F7CD.AC9BADB2.IP) [QUIT: kick Children_Of_Bodom Can i kick myself lol]
• Quits: Big_Lebowski (Joe_Nobody@p2p-8BC44.dnvr.qwest.net) [QUIT: kick necro i hate him]
• Quits: infamouseric (infamouser@p2p-89C5D.dial1.cincinnati1.level3.net) [QUIT: kick streetracer bahhh]
#41056
<@Hatman> Well that was fun
<@Hatman> At dinner, we usually watch tv, and as usual I am mesmerised by it..
<@Hatman> Well, I was trying to scoop some sauce out of a bowl with my knife...actually that was after I was trying to eat my food with two knifes, wondering why the fuck it wasn't working without realising..
<@Hatman> Anyways, I'm trying to scoop some sauce out of this bowl while watching tv...
<@Hatman> So my Dad goes 'Constantin, why don't you just use that spoon in front of you'...
<@Hatman> ..just when he said that a ad for Matrix, which is going to be shown tomorrow, came on, and I just said "there is no spoon"
<@Hatman> ..and he get's all pissed of and goes "what the fuck are you talking you moron, it's right in front of you"
<@Hatman> ..I'm done.
#297721
<Artifice> Whoever reminded me of bash.org: Fuck you, I just wasted 2 hours, and I'm not done yet
#46474
<fr_gment> Right-wing, fundamentalist Christian religious groups are proponents of teaching abstinence over contraception in schools, correct?
<autrereine> Correct.
<fr_gment> Abstinence didn't save the Virgin Mary!
#16744
<Joelz> im gonna savet hgis log so I can prove im drunk
#306020
<gde33> When reading ##politics I'm always amazed how smart people are in all the other channels.
#44923
<CAPS-LOCK> And now for some good news... Remember that HD I was whining about? I managed to get the drive up and running long enough to get the data off of it.
<CAPS-LOCK> I did so by stuffing paperclips down the hollow stubs of the power pins, removing a power connector block and exposing the wires, and using alligator clips to connect the power wires to the ends of the paperclips
<CAPS-LOCK> \o/
<Pliong> that's impressively ghetto
#32027
DesertRemix: if i could fucking spell itd be a damn mircale
DesertRemix: ciracle
DesertRemix: ...
DesertRemix: +corrections
#29503
<Lippizanr> agh, my professor asks hard questions
<DJ-Pyro> sleep with him, much easier than doing actual work...and less painful
<Lippizanr> its a her.
<DJ-Pyro> sleep with her, much easier than doing actual work...and less painful
#310318
<danh> there is this insanely important insanely crazy suite of perl scripts here
<danh> this guy is here trying to figure out why it doesnt work
<danh> he has a value '7.0.3'
<danh> he keeps calling it a float
<danh> he keeps trying to multiply it
<danh> im looking him up in LDAP
<danh> he's been here for 5 years
<danh> now he's multiplying it by 1 to make it an integer
#57183
<Hyp3rHax0r> aw man
<Hyp3rHax0r> I just set up a new Dell at the library
<mikeonthecompute> k?
<Hyp3rHax0r> while I was removing the various AOL toolbars, Norton popped up to tell me it had created access rules for RealPlayer.
<Hyp3rHax0r> I had to take a shower after I was done.
#8741
<Doomaholic> my pad fell off, and i can play in an octave thats not supposted to exist
#12123
<Farnarcle> you use mIRC?
<EvilElmo`> whats mIRC?
<Farnarcle> ok dont worry diff IRC proggy
<EvilElmo`> whats IRC?
#11271
<Sandie> http://www.nifty.org/nifty/gay/celebrity/wesleys-anal-ordeal <- Sci needs to see this
<Sandie> "As Wesley opened his mouth in agony Kor slid the gigantic head of
<Sandie> his Klingon cock into his soft boy-mouth. Wes's scream became a gurgle as
<Sandie> he began nursing the head in compliance with Kor's bellowing order to
<Sandie> please his warrior dick with his pussyboy mouth.
<c_thur> ...
* Tomko slits his wrists and welcomes the sweet red death