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#66161
Metalcore: see, the lack of emotion i could ALMOST deal with.
Metalcore: if you know, she would ever talk to me.
Metalcore: it's like squeezing water from a rock.
Metalcore: but not just any rock.
Metalcore: like, a rock that exists in a universe that lacks the hydrogen and oxygen atoms.
#303214
<highjack> does anyone have a time machine I can borrow?
<Zetta> highjack: yeah, but I need it back ten minutes ago
#305335
-!- sycobuny[telnet] [~sycobuny@cloak.hsd1.md.comcast.net] has joined #malkier
< sycobuny[telnet]> hi
< sycobuny[telnet]> it turns out there are no irc clients installed on larry's machine
< sycobuny[telnet]> typing the raw IRC still works though!
#18939
<Jasmine> kat works for cunts :)
<lsd_dishes> is that like working for peanuts, but more fun?
#11598
<kero> if you jizzed and there wasn't any gravity, u think there'd be a kickback?
<kero> if i was on mars, i'd def hide behind a crater and jerk off
<kero> just to say i did
<fzt> that'd kind suck to be lost in space cause you were viciously beating off
on the moon.
#2105
<RockShox> greddy is pretty high quality stuff
<RockShox> i prefer apexi exhausts tho
<ocx> for cars?
<RockShox> no for bicycles
#21579
* typeoghoul MY INTERNET KID GOT A 1200 ON HER SAT"S
<Predddan> internetkid?
<typeoghoul> yes
<Predddan> like a tamagotchi?
<typeoghoul> human
<Predddan> like a human tamagotchi u control over the internet?
<Predddan> kewl..
#7703
<Multus> Indeed. And, fear not, a sense of humor be not required for my employ, though a sense of direction helps, or perhaps a Yahoo! Map, for finding my land can be a chore in itself.
<Jolieve> (( Multus... you have been warned about the out of genre commentary... please cease and desist now, this is your final warning. ))
<Multus> Er...
<Multus> Forgive, I did not mean Yahoo! Maps. What madness do I speak? I, um, believe they are called Huzzah! Maps in this land. Yes?
#32045
<RoseyCat> I didnt even nothice
<RoseyCat> wow, I type with a lisp now
#37968
<Norgus> I bought cheapy headphones and they sound like some sailor stuck his dick in my ear.
#34820
<ushi> only on the internet is it acceptable to find out someone's basic information and status by fingering them
#162354
<skumby> i think only japanese chicks can get away with blue hair, a miniskirt, and a severed tentacle hanging from their twat
#1633
<Defect> i've sworn off dating to the point where my mother's inquiries as to whether or not i'm gay are getting frustratingly more frequent.
<harb> Defect : Haha.
<harb> I hate that.
<harb> My mom asked me ONCE.. and I just started laughing.
<harb> And then went back to my David Hasslehoff shrine.
<Defect> she visited me a couple weekends ago and we went out to dinner, she had a few drinks and said "You can tell me if you're gay you know, i'm drunk now, i can take it."
#38960
<Crest> help! my cell phone won't stop vibrating
<NJX180> wanna trade?
#6056
<Guyver3> koolaid time
<Guyver3> what today
<Guyver3> strawberry kiwi
<Guyver3> strawberry kiwi lemonade
<Guyver3> mountain berry blast
<Guyver3> or blood of the preacher's daughter?
<kingmob> the blood one. definitely.
#156
<||CHAOS||> they just jumped into bed when i showed them how i added a speaker to my ti-83
#10686
<astroDZ> i brought back marlbro 100s
<astroDZ> a carton of them to smoke
<astroDZ> i was told that were was enuff tar in 1 pack , to zip up all of freebsd and openbsd
<astroDZ> anyone care to confirm?
#306819
<MisfortuneCooki> so i had this group meeting
<MisfortuneCooki> where several groups had to make a model of some new building that serves a purpose on campus
<MisfortuneCooki> my group built a stripclub
<MisfortuneCooki> a hexagonal stripclub
<MisfortuneCooki> and we named it the sexagon
<MisfortuneCooki> and we WON
#120429
< meltingwax> If only there was a Unicode symbol for how much i hate Web 2.0
#9399
<Ragnarok> i kinda like that
<Ragnarok> i dig the natural look
<haole> then you'll be quite pleased with her crotch afro
<haole> it looks like a 70s blaxploitation extra
#294521
<&qqhax> guys guys
<&qqhax> this is fucking epic right now
<&qqhax> so, my comcast cable box wasn't working
<&qqhax> so i went into the diagnostic menu to play with the frequencies
<&qqhax> and found the menu that lets you enable the dvr even thought i'm not paying for it
<&qqhax> so anyway
<&qqhax> i enable the dvr and reboot the box
<&qqhax> then go to the dvr menu
<&qqhax> comcast gave me a used box
<&qqhax> that has 120gb
<&qqhax> 64% of it is ppv porn.
#44065
<sirveaux> so here is my take on just one aspect of intarweb politics: AOLers
<sirveaux> (AOLer) The other day, a I and a chum of mine were in the middle of an intellectual debate pertaining to the German spelling reform of 1996 and its ramifications when--
<sirveaux> (nonAOLer) omg dude r u liek an AOHELLER?/
<sirveaux> (AOLer) Why, yes I am, and--
<sirveaux> (nonAOLer) omg lolollol
<sirveaux> AOLer was kicked by nonAOLer (leik omg aohel si 4 faggerts)
<sirveaux> (nonAOLer2) rofflekopter
<sirveaux> (nonAOLer) lest go fap to screnns of linix
<sirveaux> (nonAOLer2) well lemme grab sum lube, wud u
#30453
<@JFeeple> I love this commercial.... KFC's "healthy" pitch
<@JFeeple> bad enough when Subway does it, but at least that one is more or less true if you get the right sandwich *and* if you put on the right condiments *and* if you don't wreck it by getting chips
<@Orca> And don't get a drink
<@Orca> (or get a diet drink)
<@Orca> a large softdrink is loaded with calories
<@JFeeple> unsweetened ice tea is fine
<@JFeeple> but fried chicken? yeah, sure, it's better than a whopper. There is a term for that.. it's "damning with faint praise"
<@Orca> "Fried chicken - it's better than getting run over by a truck!"
#1596
<Prae> ANY WOMEN AGED 25 TO 30 IN ENGLAND!?
<Prae> I'LL DRIVE 500 MILES FOR A FUCK IF I HAVE TO
#241
<SWM> if the average penis is 6"
<SWM> and the average pussy is 8" deep that means there''s about 2 miles of unused pussy in like New York