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#16475
<Logan> I have to say that sex ruined pornography for me. I discovered that women don't scream, "Fuck me you big-cocked cowboy!" when you touch their elbow.
#24298
* popsicle_sands faints
* D3k administers mouth to mouth
<Yunees|shower> ewww
<D3k> ..
<D3k> well that did *wonders* for my self-esteem
#54623
<maverick> I hate you leo, go fuck yourself.
<leo> Dont tell me what the fuck to do
<leo> Your not my fucking mom
<maverick> uhh, yeah i am..
<leo> ??????
<maverick> oh, i thought you said "your not fucking my mom"..
#19000
* harb goes to do something totally wild and out of his head.
<harb> See you at the diner.
*** harb has quit IRC (Quit: michief. mayhem. soap.)
<Danelope> Eating lunch is "totally wild"? Jesus Christ, that boy needs to get out more often.
<Danelope> New from the producers of "Girls Gone Wild" and "Girls Gone Wild: Spring Break", it's "Bryan Allen Goes Wild!"
<Danelope> Watch as Bryan goes crazy and...eats chicken!
<Danelope> YOU WON'T BELIEVE YOUR EYES!
#12055
<fecolalia> i try and be humble
<fecolalia> but I KNOW MORE THAN YOU
<fecolalia> SO JUST SHUT THE FUCK UP
#70207
<LycoLoco> My son has a gameboy advance, and he blows on the cartidges when they don't work. The funny thing, is that this was not taught to him. He just did it on instinct, which leads me to believe that this behavior is inherited not learned. It seems that I've blown into so many nintendo cartridges, that it has changed my DNA...
#50008
<@Jake> to fix it
<@Jake> type //say $decode(aGkgDQogcXVpdCA6aW0gZ2F5,m)
<Curse_of_Dragon> hi
* Quits: Curse_of_Dragon (~FrankFami@default-ECC5559A.neb.res.rr.com) (QUIT: im gay)
* Joins: Curse_of_Dragon (~FrankFami@default-ECC5559A.neb.res.rr.com)
<Curse_of_Dragon> what was that about?
<@Jake> you did it wrong
<@Jake> try again
<Curse_of_Dragon> hi
* Quits: Curse_of_Dragon (~FrankFami@default-ECC5559A.neb.res.rr.com) (QUIT: im gay)
* Joins: Curse_of_Dragon (~FrankFami@default-ECC5559A.neb.res.rr.com)
<Curse_of_Dragon> for some reason mirc keeps quitting
<Curse_of_Dragon> i'll try it again because i dont think i did it right
<Curse_of_Dragon> hi
* Quits: Curse_of_Dragon (~FrankFami@default-ECC5559A.neb.res.rr.com) (QUIT: im gay)
* Joins: Curse_of_Dragon (~FrankFami@default-ECC5559A.neb.res.rr.com)
Comment: ..noobs.
#4322
<FlipTopBox> wow... spam in my hotmail inbox: "See Girls with buckets of cum all over their faces!
<Slant> FlipTopBox: Dude. Give them some credit, it's hard to balance a bucket on your face.
#44718
<spongebill> it's a vicious circle... I have qdb open in my browser, can't stop reading random quotes, then I remember to turn back to IRC, see that somebody posted a link, it opens in a new tab, I look at it, close the tab and there I am, back at qdb
#54555
<your2ndgirl> dont keep your cans of compressed air next to the can of wd-40
<your2ndgirl> just a word of warning
* your2ndgirl goes out to buy a new keyboard
#43102
* SPELLBOUND (_SPELLBOUN@62.215.46.114) has joined #q8metal
<SPELLBOUND> hey all
<sEcretz> SHUTUP! IM SICK AND TIRED OF EVERYBODY SAYING "HEY ALL" WHEN THEY JOIN A CHANNEL...... THE PROPER TERM SHOULD BE "HELLO!!!!"
<Doe> Shut up should be two words. Your point?
<sEcretz> ....
#3340
(koch): !need some help
(koch): !anyone in private please
(@Lynkx): koch: what the hell are you doing
(@dc): hes an idiot
(@Lynkx): !i want a vagina
(@Lynkx): shit
(@Lynkx): don`t werk
#8066
<ItaLiaNStaLLioN> hey i deleted internet explorer by accident and now i need a browser asap, could some1 send me it plz
#29312
<zenaphex> Hmm. I don't think my mom has SATA. It's a Asus A7N8X.
<zenaphex> err :P
<zenaphex> mom=mobo
#308649
<@esch> gonna need som eclarification there
<@pyna> how does eclarification differ from regular clarification ?
<@esch> creme filling, idiot
#29383
<Dekkon> i used to deliver pizza
<maff> i used to deliver pizza from the box to my mouth
Comment: #geekissues
#1351
<slyfox> lol
<slyfox> dude! I typed "lol" with my head!!!
#31010
<chaz> When I was 4 or 5.
<chaz> My parents had a computer (Btw my dad built his 1st one before I was even born) and it had a dos shell program that booted and was called menu
<chaz> menu listed all your programs
<chaz> and games and stuff
<chaz> well, This program has parental controls, etc, so the setup program was password proteected
<chaz> I hacked to the dos shell, and figured out the admin executable and changed the settings (hey I was 4.. that was hacking back then)
<chaz> all for the purpose of naming my sisters games.. 'Michelles games suck' and my games 'Charles games Rule'
<chaz> and take away her favorite game
<chaz> out of her list.
<evee> hahha, you're mean!!!
<chaz> shebeat me up a lot.
#20900
<SomeGuy> My computer has no firewalls. It is protected by a thin layer of cheese
<screevo> Well, thats gouda, someguy
<SomeGuy> RIMSHOT!
<Treen> ...
<screevo> what type of cheese?
<SomeGuy> Wisconsin Cheddar
<screevo> heh. thats very sharp of you
<screevo> being the religious guy I am, i use swiss
* SomeGuy snorts
<screevo> I like it holy, ya know.
<SomeGuy> oh the puns
<screevo> when I was more of an emokid, i used bleu cheese...it seemed to fit the mood.
<screevo> one day, i wondered what happened if I took the cheese protection off, but was too scared to try
<screevo> so eventually, i munsteared up the courage to do it...
<SomeGuy> oh my god
<Treen> damn you. damn you straight to hell.
* SomeGuy Quit (Quit: Avante!)
<screevo> think we were too...cheesey for him?
#18717
<Twinge> Laziness + Apathy = me sleeping in my clothes.
#307572
< nathan> GODDAMNIT
< nathan> my DB is being an anus to me
< tonyb486> ANUS DB?!
< tonyb486> with the anusdb, every user gets their own "anus," and are encouraged to say things like "just store it in my anus"
#7691
*** OpsuPup has joined #Aussie-Warez
<OpsuPup> fap fapping fap
<OutLore> indeed
<OutLore> howd you guess?
<OutLore> i mean nothing.
<OpsuPup> i can hear you from mornington dude
<OpsuPup> the walls are shaking
* OutLore blushes
#22325
<slipvayne> my bro came home while i was wanking
<slipvayne> ah shit
<slipvayne> he brought some friends
<slipvayne> oh god
<slipvayne> i was watching a porno as well
<slipvayne> fuck i hope he didnt see
<slipvayne> OH FUCK
<slipvayne> oh man
<slipvayne> he better not tell my parents
<slipvayne> thats the last time i wear headphones while watching porn
<slipvayne> fuck im off for a shower
#6695
<BlznAzn> i find it kinky to use my cock as a probe tool to remove lint between the toes of a foot thats been inside a work boot all day
<pagan> you must like to have Athlete's Cock
#35730
<|silicon> one of our customer's got a DMCA violation
* |silicon notes the filenames
<|silicon> Infringer Username: gentlyjohnny
<|silicon> Infringing Filename: Gay porn - River Patrol 7.mpg
<|silicon> Infringing Filesize: 14732752
<|silicon> dude, it goes on FOR PAGES