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#31921
<Wallrod> i hate having my room right next to the bathroom
<Wallrod> i have to hear my dad take a shit
<Wallrod> EVEN DEATH METAL DOESNT COVER ALL THE FREQUENCIES MY DAD'S ASS BROADCASTS ON
#58745
<Omi> I owned someone at work today
<Xa> How'd you manage that?
<Omi> He was pratting about chasing after the girls
<Omi> 'Cause he's a fucktard like that
<Omi> But he took his shoes off so he wouldnt make loud noises
<Omi> Which would attract the boss's attention
<Omi> So I nailed his shoes to the floor
<Xa> Rofl
<Omi> Someone said the boss was coming
<Omi> So he sprinted back to his shoes
<Omi> Jumped in them
<Omi> And then fell on his face when he tried to walk forward
#9038
ilsa: well i suppose calculus isn't rocket science and some people can't do that...
MistrE: calc is nearly rocket science
CuriosCat can do rocket science
CuriosCat: it's easier than calculuc
CuriosCat: caalculus
#176915
* scooter mails the fist of death to one of the sales guys
<~scooter> he calls up and asks "how is the project for $client going?"
<~scooter> uhh, i have no idea what you are talking about. in fact, i don't see that we ever got a request for $client to build anything. the status is that you never entered a request.
<~scooter> "*clickety* *clickety* you should have one now."
<~scooter> i look and see "build a project for $client per the phone conversation we're having now"
<~scooter> "what's the status on it?"
<~scooter> i bit the end of the phone and cracked it
Comment: #geeks
#300820
Dave: what's the site
Dave: that if someone asks about something
Dave: it types in the subject into google for you
Dave: showing you how to do it
... Time passes ...
Dave: who would have ever thought that it's called
Dave: let me google that for you
#8648
<hakan> i asked this hot girl out, she said she just wanted to be pen pals
<hakan> and she dropped our class
<dr_rotcod> haha
<hakan> is that a good thing?
#5626
*** jonathans changes topic to 'PLZ FWD ALL PACKAGES MARKED "GAY" TO PROPER DEPARTMENTS (IN REAR)'
#2290
<eldee> finding wiring diagrams on the web isnt fun at all
<eldee> because.. you really dont find any wiring diagrams
<eldee> just porn.. how wiring diagrams and porn can be confused in a search engine, i've yet to discover
#6282
<tertyl> and i've bent a spoon with the power of my mind...though when the drugs wore off..it was back to normal...
#3363
<Nettik> I had some Huge ass guy name Ray try to squeeze the shit out of me
<Nettik> the guy is REAL strong and pretty agile for being big
<Nettik> he grabbe a hold of me and started squeezing, he didnt like it when I kicked his leg out from underneath him too much, but he squeezed harder. It all depends on how far I was willing to go
<spazzer> <Nettik> and soon i had a nice loaf the size of a breadbox in my drawers
#16997
<Whooey> females jeans pockets are TINY
<Whooey> TTIIIIIIIIIINY
<Natasha> yes, they are
<amit> Whooey: females have a big flesh pocket to compensate
#34173
<Rykan> you know your lonely when your alone in a room with chanserv and just start talking to it XD
<Ras> Chanserv is a better conversationalist than any of my exxes
<Ras> and half the people on my base
<Ras> and im not kidding.
Comment: #MxO stratics
#20355
<mailfraud> did i tell u i wore out the motor on my vibrator?
#14704
<PTM> when i was ten...
<PTM> (interesting story, no?)
<PTM> i was messing around with a neighbor girl
<PTM> and like
<PTM> it was mostly naked wrestling
<PTM> with penetration
<PTM> but no orgasms.
<Damsel> you fucking fucked at 10?
<PTM> well if that's your definition of fuck, i suppose
#44738
<Perplexed> Brit, finish JR High and get back to us
<brittlala> ive finnished jr high. notice how finnished is spelled with 2 ns, ass gobbler
#302477
< Glayde|w> i remember telling a friend 'you have to register your nickname'
< Glayde|w> the next day he tells me how he registered mirc
#14524
<Taze> "LEGOLAS PANTS AS HE FILLS YOUR SHAKING LOVE TUNNEL WITH HIS LONG ELVEN ROD"
* Scibert blinks.
<Scibert> "Love tunnel?"
<arenotelicon> yes Sci.
<arenotelicon> this is why porn stories scare me.
<Scibert> Since when did the human body turn into an amusement park ride?
<arenotelicon> we're not sure.
<arenotelicon> sometime after porn was invented.
#300112
[kris] Hey, roomie... you know that "oh fuck" moment when you realize you have to go to the ER?
[grego] Yeah, ... ???
[kris] Grab you car
#3748
<tomg> are there any programs that will scan a remote ip to see if there are any common trojans on it (I want this for GOOD use :))?
<JibberJim> Does anyone know where I can buy big guns, it's okay it's for a GOOD use.
<Eibon> I'm looking for anthrax. Anyone know where I can find some?
#30403
<Cyrack> told my girlfriend that MS could get all her personal letters... now she unplugs the network before starting Office... :-(
#8111
<@IS2> play it again, dugy
<@Dugy> oooooooo ah ooooo da da de da dooo
<@Dugy> oooooooo ah ooooo daaaaa da daaa
<@Dugy> oooooooo ah ooooo da da de da dooo
<@IS2> ahhh, what a classic
* IS2 saves it to his mp3 collection
<@Dugy> :(
#6434
<Cheetah> heh, someone else who was on my box didn't like my lack of bitchx ...
<sig11> heh?
<Cheetah> bitchx
<Cheetah> BitchX
<Cheetah> for fucks..
<Cheetah> (from .bash_history)
<Cheetah> who actually types things like for fucks.. into their shell?
#29407
<Synlor> want jesus to rise from the grave and rape me
<Synlor> twice
<TiTaN> STFU faggot.
<Synlor> dont be all jealous just cause our savior thinks im hot and youre not
#13541
<MartinBr> LOOK AT MY IDLE!!!
<MartinBr> Uh.... d'oh!
#28796
<Quiksilve> is there any other free domains than .tk?
<hydro-> a .com address is free if you suck internic's cock
<Quiksilve> hydro-: that's not funny=)
<hydro-> you say that now
<hydro-> but 10 years down the line, when you're giving head for domains, you won't be doing it to humor yourself