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#31217
<+Segosa> hahaha
<+Segosa> that was brilliant
<+Segosa> I was playing MTA
<+Segosa> and i joined a server with 2 people on already
<`> what was brilliant?
<+Segosa> both dutch, and they were talking
<+Segosa> they were planning on ganging up on me
<+Segosa> but they didnt know i spoke dutch
<`> hehehe! :D
<+Segosa> so they were talking and i always knew what they were saying so they never got you
<+Segosa> got me*+
<+Segosa> and just before i left i said:
<+Segosa> de volgende keer moet je het harder proberen (Next time you'll have to try harder)
<+Segosa> :P
<+Segosa> and they're like "WTF" "BASTARD!"
Comment: MTA is Multi Theft Auto (Mod to play GTA:VC online)
#142213
<Orkie> it was pointed out to me earlier that i don't actually swallow a lot of the time when drinking anything :S
<Orkie> i'd never really noticed it before but even when i just have water i just tip the thing straight down my throat!
<Duo> Orkie: you'll make some man very happy one day.
#118822
cycon365: autistic kids rock
cycon365: we're all afraid of him shooting us, so we take that into account and just try to talk and joke with him
cycon365: he talked with us and our teacher and kept making "your mom" jokes
kyo212: lawl
cycon365: we got tired of him talking in general so we tried to curb his "mom" jokes
cycon365: so we were like, "dude, you shouldn't make fun of people's moms, my mom could be dead"
cycon365: and the kid goes, "no she's not", so i look at him and go, "oh yeah, how do you know"
cycon365: and he quickly replies, "cuz she was awesome in bed last night"
kyo212: gawd, you got pwned by an autistic kid
#7230
[ace_kevi] heh, i didn't know there was a programming language called
brainfuck.
[buz-] goes by "MIPS assembler" also
#64358
<absinth> omg ! my father finished call of duty!
<misiek> so what?
<absinth> nothing but during the last-but-one mission he asked me whether one can change Colt to another gun..
Comment: note: Translated from Polish
#300697
<Green> So I got in my car
<Green> and there was birdshit on my windsheild
<Green> so i got a paper towel and got out to wipe it off
<Green> but it wouldn't come off
<Green> and thats when I realized it was on the INSIDE
<Green> I had a hard time getting to sleep that night
#21689
*** evader (evader@fear.evader.org) has joined #bodybuilding
<evader> what do i need to do to make a six pack
<aNuBiS-> 6 beer
#310271
< nokocode> is there a help channel available?
< Master_Lyon> this is the help channel
< Master_Lyon> for c++
< Master_Lyon> there is also ##c++-general and ##c++-social
< pakcjo> no ##c++-haters? :( so sad
< kalven> pakcjo: this channel doubles as that
Comment: freenode ##c++
#4134
<Scofco> just because i like hairless chicks with small tits, and that are younger than me, does not make me a pedophile
<Scofco> it makes me borderline pedophile
#300462
<nlogax> lol.. a guy here at work saw his position being advertised.. and got pissed off
<miketaylr> oops
<ben_alman> like an additional resource, or a replacement?
<nlogax> they haven't said.. he sent in an application :D
<nlogax> and said "if you want to know more i'm just 15m away!"
<ben_alman> he applied for his own job?
<nlogax> yes
#6277
<Speck> being able to type doesn't mean you're a computer nerd. It just means you have a higher intelligence than a turnip
#2861
[23:03] <`Jamesy> i am a raging homosexual.
[23:03] <`Jamesy> i am a raging homosexual.
[23:03] <`Jamesy> i am a raging homosexual.
[23:03] <`Jamesy> i am a raging homosexual.
[23:03] <exploding_elf> watch it `Jamesy, keep your fluids to yourself and dont flood
#28317
<ThisIsASentenceInANick> Saber, just imagine yourself being gangbanged by moths. This is what will happen to you if you don't behave.
<Saber> what
<Saber> I didn't do anything
<Saber> and I have a bat
<Saber> I'll fight them off
<ThisIsASentenceInANick> That's not going to help a lot.
<ThisIsASentenceInANick> Can't you just feel their tiny cocks writhing against your skin, Saber?
<ThisIsASentenceInANick> Just straining to reach an orifice?
<ThisIsASentenceInANick> Do you like it?
<ThisIsASentenceInANick> Does it feel good?
<Saber> That's bizarre to the point that it doesn't affect me
#309823
<shachaf> *!*@* would be a good name for a ban
#679
<gambit32> Would you like an orgasmic disorder?
<gargos> No... I've got homework to do.
#26265
<keithandmike-com> Just stop.. okay. Damnit, I hate you so much. You probably sit and write these down and just wait for me to join. Bastard. Eat corn poop.
<Fembot> Mike joined the Navy and wanted to become a SEAL... there was something appealing about their creed to "never leave their buddy's behind"
#2402
<intra> I want to propose to my wife with a giant foam #1 finger instead of a ring.
#297266
<Warchamp7> The other day at work, two of my bosses were trying to find each other in the office
<Warchamp7> And they were yelling "Ping!" back and forth
<Warchamp7> It was one of the greatest moments of my life
Comment: #MAGFest on irc.vgmusic.net
#30933
<jp-minip[hw]> pm me with romantic christmas gift ideas for ur girlfriend, dont pm me unless u have one ty ;) [/amsg]
<jp-minip[hw]> omg fking fags forget it, goatse.cx cookies are NOT romantic
#310438
<+element> i hope im not bleeding out of my asshole
<Tarball`> famous last words
#51456
< BernardBlack> i just thought of something
< BernardBlack> do midget bakers bake shortbread?
Comment: #otw on freenode
#1485
<MrP-> what is wrong with slashdot.org?? I am almost done reading my 1997-2001 Slashdot.org cache CD-ROM set, if I finish and its not back up, I may perish
#1306
(nexxai) holy fuck...I was just reading a ton of IRC quotes, then got up, and it was like I entered a new dimension
(nexxai) reality.....it's weirder than you think.
#150929
<gavin|> wtf
<gavin|> I just realized that 2 years ago I paid for a 19" LCD but received a 17"
<gavin|> this is so odd
<gavin|> I'm looking into buying a new monitor
<gavin|> so I look at the current monitor I have
<gavin|> it's a 17"
<gavin|> then I look at my receipt from 2 years ago when I bought it
<gavin|> supposed to be a 19"
<gavin|> I... feel dumb
#43492
(@ddew|bofh) heh, I really need to get out more. I just ogt annoyed that a truck was revving it's engine outside so I went out to check what was going on. Turns out that the apartment next to mine was on fire and the truck I heard was one of 3 fireengines :)