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#21634
<Chojin_> I mean I'm STILL insulted that she saw me just as a walking dildo
<bngrybt> heh
<bngrybt> yeah that's what tisha thought of me i think
<CommanderStab> I'd be insulted at that Chojin, but only that she acutally BELIEVED she could get away with it
<bngrybt> cuz jody asked her what she liked about me and the first thing she said was practically "well his dick's like 8 inches long!
#17931
<MrEnthusiasm> ugh, new david bowie cd boasted that it had interactive multimedia on it
<MrEnthusiasm> what it meant was 2 buttons, one to play the cd and one to connect to a site
#31037
<Wonker> gay
<Wonker> homo
<Wonker> queer
<Wonker> fag
<Wonker> bottom licker
<Wonker> fudge packer
<Wonker> willy magnet
<turtle> man-butt doer.
<Yiff> Arsebandit
<Wonker> pillow biter
<Wonker> anal intruder
<dzee> Brown Pipe Technician
<Yiff> Vagina decliner. Ololo
<JAG> ass piss
<Wonker> no Jag, you havne't quite got the idea now, have you?
Comment: #pcgam0r on gamesnet
#106799
<Emmles> Guess what?
<Stueh> What?
<Emmles> I just had my first pee as an 18 year old
<Emmles> It was intense.
#39727
trillium45: So today, i was mowing the lawn and i could smell something burning
trillium45: and i thought, how nice, the smell of burning leaves in autumn
trillium45: so i was happily mowing along
trillium45: and then i looked down and saw flames shooting out of the lawn mower
#20193
«@hyu» i need an 800 by 600 jesus wallpaper
«@SkywardShadow» Type it into google. ;P
«@hyu» i am
«@hyu» google's being nasty
«@hyu» oooh, got a purdy one
«@hyu» and it's password protected
«@hyu» wtf
«@Vormav» haha
«@hyu» who password protects bible pictures?
«@Vormav» ACCESS TO JESUS DENIED
#2326
<rogue> I'm a flaming homosexual!
<rogue> I was out there being gay, and one of those radical right-wingers set me on fire!
#299627
<altoid> i remember once talking to someone at the helpdesk at ucsd
<altoid> i mentioned i was having trouble getting GNOME to work on Gentoo (never did solve the problem)
<altoid> (used KDE the entire time instead, out of laziness)
<altoid> and he was like "oh, did you lose your windows CDs or something?
#24174
<Gnell|CHAMPION> OMG A DONKEY JUST WENT BY OUTSIDE MY HOUSE
<Gnell|CHAMPION> i wanna ride it
* Gnell|CHAMPION is away
#308036
<nupanick> What part of the day do you most associate with masturbation?
<GreyMaria> awake
#302338
<frysteev> im wondering what weekend at bernies would have been like if jim henson made it
#1554
<ckx> i get a bunch of scrambled porn
<ckx> one time i was jerking off to this channel
<ckx> 102
<ckx> and like then i realized it was two guys
<ckx> cuz 102 was a gay channel
<ckx> 101 was the good hardcore porn
<HomerJ> HAW
<ckx> but by then i was already into it
<ckx> so i didn't change it
#21281
PegLegPete PM: yo
PegLegPete PM: you there?
PolishPWRHaus: yea
PegLegPete PM: come over
PegLegPete PM: we're playing poker
PolishPWRHaus: nice
PolishPWRHaus: what time
PegLegPete PM: when everybody gets here
PolishPWRHaus: so when should i head over
PegLegPete PM: ...
#237754
<Technocactus> So me and Will are walking down the street
<Technocactus> And we see some German chicks chilling
<Technocactus> Will knows a bit of German, so he agrees to give me some lines to say
<Technocactus> Meant to be shit like "You're looking good"
<Technocactus> Fucker got me to say in German "I'd marry any of you except the fat one"
<Technocactus> So now I got this handprint on my face where the fat girl slapped me :\
#46505
<LiENUS> anyone ever have trouble with neopets.com crashing squid?
<korozion> LiENUS, not anyone over the age of 14, no
#95752
<mongrethod> the highschool journalism website i run gets 50k hits monthly
<mongrethod> and I was really happy about that
<mongrethod> until I looked at our search keyphrase hits
<mongrethod> top category that wasn't "other"
<mongrethod> "Paly Boy"
<mongrethod> My school is named paly
<mongrethod> so I was thinking
<mongrethod> hmm thats odd
<mongrethod> then it hit me
<mongrethod> rearrange the a and the l
<mongrethod> I haven't had the heart to tell my staff
#297968
[carbine] Uh oh. Foxconn employee killed himself after losing an iPhone prototype
[errata4q] wtf?
[errata4q] is that the macworld article?
[wliao] it's on wired as well
[carbine] You know what this means?
[carbine] NEW IPHONE ON THE WAY!
[carbine] Woo!
#295506
PartyGirl1450981: so I was watching this porn, right?
PartyGirl1450981: and I was really getting into it
PartyGirl1450981: and then I found out it was actually two guys fucking
PartyGirl1450981: then I came
PartyGirl1450981: does this make me gay?
GoKillPeople: Yes.
GoKillPeople: ...What are you doing tonight?
#59529
<ArchPlan> I'm expecting an onslaught of malware to my company's network this week... we're temporarily disabling the firewall.
<ArchPlan> alot of malware may already be dormant on the company's machines, but then again, some new stuff might come as well
<fr_gment> So why not install some sort of warning system, by hanging out lanterns:
<fr_gment> One if by LAN, Two if by C:\
#12864
<usagi> "As for religion and science, I'm placing a restraining order, Religion must stay 500 feet from Science at all times."
#182652
<Tinted_Green> ok Grugg
<Tinted_Green> you and me
<Tinted_Green> we have to do that one day
<Tinted_Green> go to a pub
<Tinted_Green> and get a pint in a teapot
<Tinted_Green> and we have to wear top hats
<Tinted_Green> and monocles
<Tinted_Green> and speak in a highly refined english accent
<Tinted_Green> and see how long it takes them to throw us out
<Grugg> As soon as I can afford a ticket to australia
<Grugg> We will do this
<Turks> not without me you're fucking not
<Grugg> Didnt you threaten to murder me with an umbrella if you ever met me?
<Turks> i say alot of things
#18880
<rdgzt> I went through my logs and looked for funny stuff.
<rdgzt> In fact, I grepped for "haha" with 10 lines of context before.
#10947
<@Drezdar> This summer I'm gonna buy a DDR pad. I figure I can kill three birds with one stone by doing this: 1) play a game, 2) exercise, 3) swear off heterosexuality for good.
#4232
<ian__> Am I gay?
<qin> yes.
<ian__> ahhhh
<ian__> i knew something wasn't quite right
#4097
<[ric]> pfft... oh, well when I am dead my gravestone will simply read.. http://www.geekissues.org/quotes/?search=%5Bric%5D