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#33263
* HPLPB|Comp2 needs to wash dishes and cook pasta
<DB> HPLPB|Comp2: By that, you mean "Wash my vibrator and tune into some gay porn", no?
<HPLPB|Comp2> DB: pretty much
#59753
<Calamarain> Idiot. Someone told me that Schindler's list was a "box of tissues film"
<Calamarain> What a load of crap
<Calamarain> I only jerked off once.
#1117
<hypr> WE IS TO CUT OFF ALL SUPPLIES OF VODKA TO YOUR SHITHOUSE COUNTRY
#52767
anotherpadawan42: I just upgraded my web hosting and now have 408 megs of free space
QreepyBORIS: Ooooh
anotherpadawan42: Dude I nearly jacked off looking at the free space pie graph.
#48300
<tumnus> i just set my clock the easiest way ever
<tumnus> i waited until it was midnight then i plugged it in and left it
#6828
<tweet> does n e one else's gf ever told them they wanna fuck you with a strapon?
<Nekorin> Good news, Tweet, you have a girlfriend.
<Nekorin> Bad news, she's thinks you're gay.
#36160
<scorf> enormous penises have bigger holes, allowing for a greater number of demons to gain entrance, which is why black men commit so much crime
<rpop> demons enter through the penis!?
<scorf> it would appear so, from this thing I read on the internet which is true!
<rpop> not even 7 am and I've been enlightened already!
#230078
<heros> LOL, dude, I set up this little box on the side of my car
<heros> and theres a button on it with a sign, "Do not press"
<heros> and when you press it the car alarm goes off
<jeff> lol nice
<heros> so I'm gonna count how many people do it in a week
<heros> brb
<jeff> where u going?
<heros> car alarm went off
#51788
< rebug> if god hates fags how come Jesus was so damn hot?
Comment: Theological debates on IRC
#56160
<ddrfreak> 58 points
<ddrfreak> 7 deaths
<ddrfreak> I AM A FUCKIN MACHINE!
<yeats> You killed 7 people during sex?
#310382
<@Madda> Well, people don't seem too bothered by the "Our app will now record audio from your mobile"
<@Madda> So... *shrugs*
<~Altieri> Well, part of the problem is that those privacy warnings aren't always clear.
<@Crazed_Succubus> i feel like if i was that bothered i'd cut myself off from all technology and live in the woods
<@Crazed_Succubus> but i'm determined not to Thoreau my life away
#5874
<Synoptica> having some major sound issues with gta
<Synoptica> cant think of why either
<bytraper> prolly because your gay
<Synoptica> yeah that's right
<Synoptica> gta has detected that i'm gay and adjusted it's performance accordingly
#20268
<Torn> WHAT ABOUT WE CHANGE TOPIC, BECAUSE I DON'T GET WHAT YOU ARE TALKING ABOUT
<Bloodshedder> torn's feeble mind cannot understand what we are saying
<ph`> I agree with torn
#190368
<nikki> what's sodomy..?
<hunter> HA! Gather 'round children,
<hunter> well -- the word is dervied from the cities Sodom and Gomorrah
<nikki> k.. wat?
<sparky546> basically, the cities god ass raped.
<hunter> yeah! exactly! wikipedia explains it all.
#52451
<@Lo_Pan> i came first and third in the 2005 world masturbation championships
#3791
<ScumDog> in some ways, I wish I could sit around picking bananas all day
#4918
<joey`> mcdonalds fired me for trying to install irc on the teleprompter
#28977
<danamania> oh this is lovely - mum went to the vet to pick up sasha, and bought a few things back. I'm looking over this bottle of pet shampoo thinking I'd do kokomo's coat.
<danamania> The back of the fricken bottle says "Not tested on animals"
#280960
Yan: This one time i was at a girlfriend's house
Yan: Spent the night there and everything went well
Yan: It was like 11:30 and we were in her basement and i was tired as hell so i told myself ill nap for like 30 minutes and then leave
Yan: I woke up and it was like 7:30 am. So i wake the girl up, she freaks out and asks why the fuck am i still home. She then tells me to leave and get out quick by the window.
Yan: Great idea except i had this oldschool Datsun 510 track ready that was so fucking loud i couldnt leave with it.
Yan: She wakes her parents up and tells them i slept over and nothing happened bla bla. Her dad comes out of the bedroom.
Yan: This guy is BIG ex military deep voice just plain scary. Looks at me and says "hey come to breakfast with us" i of course just wanna bounce. He insists and says "whats wrong? Had too much desert last night?"
Yan: I don't even know how i left after that.
#28869
<ThenaROX> can anyone think of a kool quit message that isnt already taken?
<-- ThenaROX has quit (Killed (*.worldirc.org (i got killed by Errtu)))
Comment: #tavern / worldirc
#9357
*** bad-_-girl has joined #devil
<[DeViL]Man> hi bad girl
<[DeViL]Man> just how bad are you?
<bad-_-girl> vey bad
<bad-_-girl> very bad
<[DeViL]Man> bad at spelling? or something else?
#51899
* WC` has to get really good at GT4 by monday
<ScrubEXE> Whys that
<rsltne> HE HAS BEEN CHALLENGED BY THE GODS.
<WC`> fastest lap time in the university = next term's tuition paid
<Tinsle> o_o
#6949
<dh> man irc is a waste of time...i should go play quake or something...
#299673
<@jen> help my mom get a demonoid account? damn thing wont let me give her an invite since were same ip :-(
<+Ailieron> Why don't you just let your mom use your account?
<~Fax> then her mom will know that Jen's been dl-ing yaoi again
<@jen> the last time i downloaded yaoi was when mom forced me to find brokeback mountain
#247109
<@Skittles_Goddess> it takes some guts to be the small penis guy
<@teejay> you have no idea
<@teejay> oh shit