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#298767
<aaron> you know, they once asked Snoop Dogg why he always walked around with an umbrella and he replied "fo drizzle"
<robink> aaron: Interesting.
<aaron> you don't get it, do you?
<pthree> no we all got it
<robink> aaron: It's a play on 'fo shizzle', meaning for sure. Instead, he said 'fo drizzle', meaning 'because of the rain'.
<pthree> but we'd prefer if you dropped us off for school a block away
#297803
<DevXen> they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
#10943
barry: 41 pix til my cam rolls over
barry: woo
Eoghann: how many til it plays dead?
Zaren: </rimshot>
#22719
marty> So, what happened, did you date her? What was she like...
deathcubek> Let me put it this way. She was like an RPG.
marty> I dont get it.
deathcubek> Well... she was long, expensive, and full of monsters.
#50455
<wrmachine> Your search - sluts! did not return any results.
<wrmachine> screw it, google video sucks.
#42930
<_stan> old macdonald had a farm
<_stan> e-i-e-i-o
<_stan> and on that farm he had a 40-50% statistical likelihood of committing an unnatural sex act with an animal according to the research of alfred kinsey
<_stan> e-i-e-i-o
Comment: #ampedOut nursery rhyme
#13583
<SinclairC> Anyone been to Taco Bell lately?
<Piccolo> No. I hate mexican. :]
<SinclairC> Taco Bell isn't Mexican, it's Taco Bell
<Piccolo> No. I hate Taco Bell. :]
<SinclairC> Taco Bell isn't Taco Bell, it's hamburgers
<Piccolo> No. I hate Hamburgers. :] Cheeseburgers are a different matter.
<SinclairC> Taco Bell isn't hamburgers, it's Dragonball Z
<Piccolo> Damm you
#33218
<ducklord> in earlier days, people took pride in combat and such
<ducklord> I take pride in not clicking bizarre porn
#9136
<Odin_Tiger> Even those maps that the psychics show of the earth flooded (the ones where science says there isn't enough water on earth for it to be possible) would have me a good 4 or 5 hour drive from any beaches.
#31957
<kotetsu> i just put a suppository up my ass
<Ash> It's a unique feeling, ne? ^_^
<Ash> You shove them in partway, then they just get sucked up like an auto-loading CD drive.
#54430
< calaf> I can't even have my cats in the room if I'm wanking
< calaf> they're other guys so they ruin it . . .
< withnail> so if they were female cats it would be cool
< bubbly> i'm trying to eat breakfast
< calaf> If a cat can form the thought, "If I jigger this doorknob with my paws, the door may open for me," then you know he knows what jacking off is
< calaf> Or, in my case four years ago, "I don't like that he's spending all this time with the girl and not me. I'm going to shit in her book bag."
< calaf> The General did that. The 911 of cat terrorism
#303515
&Akensai: i just brutally slaughtered some russian asshat
&Akensai: called me an elephant penis in russian
&Akensai: so i let him know i could understand russian
&Akensai: by calling him 2 week old moldy dick juice
&Akensai: now we're friends.
#6565
<barkode> it's all about getting drunk at defcon, and waking up the next morning in a ditch, with a TRS-80, a wireless modem, a
sombero, a pair of high heels, an angry midget and you're dressed like a mariachi.
#1047
<ryo-ohki> I'm gonna try setting up some Dutch auctions on eBay.
<blazemore> you're supposed to be 18 to use ebay though :|
<ryo-ohki> Tell that to my 200 pairs of dirty teen boy's undies.
#3673
<dregan> Shush, or I'll stab you in the groin.
<MightyQuinn> no you won't.
<MightyQuinn> MY PENIS IS FAR TOO MIGHTY TO BE STABBED!
<dregan> Would you like to test that?
<MightyQuinn> no.
<dregan> I accept it may be hard to hit first time, but I'm willing to give it a go.
#30545
<aphr0> FUCK
<aphr0> I got a cookies and snickers bar
<aphr0> isntead of cookies and m&m
<aphr0> piss fuck whores
<aphr0> god cocks
<aphr0> death
Comment: #couch on EFnet
#6876
<Spectra> hrm. Optus are going to start charging me >= $10 more per month, because "we listened to feedback from our customers".
<Spectra> I'm fascinated which customers said "we want to pay more for your service".
#306409
< iFarmer> I've come to the conclusion that the employees of my local library are idiots
< iFarmer> "Scan our QR code to browse our library database on your smartphone!"
< iFarmer> I scan the QR code. It says:
< iFarmer> "Scan our QR code to browse our library database on your smartphone!"
#101951
<michael__> can someone help me with my internet coennection
<Khrajin> michael__: I assure you it is working.
Comment: #ubuntu
#7932
<@n909> this guy is traveling in oregon
<@n909> and ran out of weed
<@n909> so he comes to #oregon
<@n909> and asks us for some
#13211
<PJ> Ok
<PJ> let me get this straight...
<PJ> Your pregnant wife shoved speed down your throat during sex?
<Covert22-UNS> Yup pretty much
#310394
<&Orillion> All my lines are under the GNU public license
<&Orillion> Feel free to interpret and rewrite them as you like
<&Orillion> I know my girlfriend does
#8257
<+Incantation> shag's 100% let you cry on his shoulder and make you think he cares so that he can manipulate you into sucking his cock
<+Julie42> HOLY SHIT! Good. Because here I was thinking I had to think of things to cry about, just so I could suck on his cock.
#300984
<Sancdar> i knew a guy named ace fabionaire or something like that, he had two brothers and a sister - king, jack, and queen
<Sancdar> good thing his parents stopped or they'd have a hard time
<Fax> well, they didn't
<Fax> but they aborted it into a royal flush.
#23938
<A-C> The thing is...there have been so many sims expansions, what the FUCK is in the original?
<Lightbunny> I think the original had an installer
<Lightbunny> Other than that Im as perplexed as you