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#8453
<Dac> ok, what does 'LUG' on a rental property listing mean?
<tm> Lots of Ugly Guys
#30106
<@crrj-lunchbreak> ROFLMAO, on the phone with my brother, internet is out at his work, his boss just said, and I heard it, "No internet? No e-mail too?"
<@crrj-lunchbreak> lol, the guy doesn't grok, no internet, no e-mail
* @DM laughs at crrj's brother's boss
<@crrj-lunchbreak> That's okay, we laugh at him too
<@crrj-lunchbreak> I used to work for him
<@crrj-lunchbreak> I watched him fry a HD by putting it circuit board down, power on, onto the chasis of the computer
Comment: And the guy supposedly does computer consulting...
#29810
<Zap> back from raev lol.
<Protected> raev?
<Gray|ogl> raev = a codename for gaybar, only gaypeople know about it
<Gray|ogl> doh.
#30455
<vermifuge> so i have this girl in bed
<vermifuge> and her friend texts her
<vermifuge> to say shes pregnant
<vermifuge> colossal 21st century cock-blocking
<jube> YOUVE GOT LIMP
#304384
<lungfish> nothing worse than a 30 year old who thinks hes really smart yet has accomplished absolutely nothing
<JDigital> lungfish: I thought you were 28
Comment: #raspberryheaven
#39964
<+Keitarou-Booyaka> oh god that was funny!
<+kiracatgirl> ?
<+Keitarou-Booyaka> she just jumps in bed all of a sudden and looks at me
<+Keitarou-Booyaka> "What time is it!?"
<+Keitarou-Booyaka> "It's 12:30 honey"
<+Keitarou-Booyaka> ... "oh crap, the alarm was supposed to go off at 12:20"
<+Keitarou-Booyaka> "What are you talking about? You don't wake up until 6:20"
<+Keitarou-Booyaka> "What time is it?"
<+Keitarou-Booyaka> "It's 12:30"
<+Keitarou-Booyaka> "ah, monkeys"
<+Keitarou-Booyaka> and she falls back down
<+kiracatgirl> monkeys?!
<+urgan> lol, mokeys
#74903
<caddis> the hardest thing about buying a macbook is telling your parents you are gay
Comment: server: irc.ruxcon.org.au, #ozphreak
#14471
<marlais> for i am no longer a stranger in the ways of the woman :P
<SoulSteal> marlais: you finally killed one, eh?
#1800
<Matt-H> Leeches cure everything.
<JDigital> What about an allergy to leeches?
<Fry> What about loss of blood ?
<Matt-H> 'cept that, you witty bastard, you.
<JDigital> Or a fear of leeches.
<JDigital> Or lag.
#532
<kisama> i've spent my last 5 new year's on either irc or aol
#19617
<Rivorus> i feel stupid cuz i can never open the godam condoms
<Rivorus> and then when i get it on i feel even more dumb cuz I'm the only one in the room
#300676
<ardchoille> Think I found a bug in the space time continuum.
<ardchoille> I put movies in the mailbox at 14:00 yesterday and Netflix has already received the movies.. it's 09:29 today.
<ardchoille> And the mail schedule for that mailbox says mail is picked up at 10:30 daily, except Sunday
<felipe> that's not bad. you could exploit that and return them before you rent them and not have to pay for any of it
#53608
ChaOSv2: hehe xbox 360 ... 'end up where you started'
#21066
<@Canadian_Beaver>Yeah, I just finished putting a coat of polish on my hubby's boobs.
<@Canadian_Beaver>ER...boots...
<@Canadian_Beaver>Dammit...I can SO see that on bash.org
*Canadian_Beaver hides in shame
#22529
<Capt_Dequranii> bah... the south were n00bs
<Capt_Dequranii> the north had the better aimbot
<crack> "omg!@! h4x h4x!~!!" Robert E. Lee
#32548
<Thompson> whats wrong wiv looking at your sisters tits and her ass?
#53901
<galisus> I think I realized I'd never touch Linux again when I was like.. "Holy shit I never have to deal with X11 EVER again.."
<galisus> It was like my first blowjob all over again.
<galisus> Good times.
#14652
<[Waste-TkO-Sc-`nnG]-a> Ah man
<[Waste-TkO-Sc-`nnG]-a> can u believe rthat/
<[Waste-TkO-Sc-`nnG]-a> i was walking out of the bathroom
<[Waste-TkO-Sc-`nnG]-a> like really fast
<[Waste-TkO-Sc-`nnG]-a> and my belt loop got caught on the door
<[Waste-TkO-Sc-`nnG]-a> I swung around and smacked into the wall
<[Waste-TkO-Sc-`nnG]-a> Damn that hurt
#212107
Matt: is it bad that I just had the thought "I wonder if I missed my 1337th masturbation"?
Cynic: you've probably missed your 13337th masturbation by now...
#49453
<Kei> oh, anyone know how the hell to amke a sonic costume?
<Kei> my brother wants to be sonic for halloween, and hes been bugging me about it all fucking day
<Kei> i dont get it either
<Zem> paint yourself blue, roll around like an idiot and stay less popular than Mario.
#7288
<PovRayMan> that was a weird dream I had last night
<PovRayMan> I was about to have sex with this hot chick
<PovRayMan> and I started peeing all over her
<PovRayMan> and she started gargling it too... damn weird
<PovRayMan> I think I know what caused it too
<PovRayMan> I went to the bathroom about 5 times last night ot pee
<PovRayMan> and a friend of mine was showing me pics he took of this girl on his campus he wants to be with
<Floach> and 3), you have a pee fetish
<gridbug> Yep.
<PovRayMan> I don't have a pee fetish.
<PovRayMan> I was trying to fuck her damnit
<PovRayMan> but I couldn't stop peeing on her
#2438
<Amanda`> it's confirmed
<Amanda`> roommate is having sex again, right now
<Amanda`> HOLY SHIT
<Amanda`> I HEAR LIKE
<Amanda`> SUCTION NOISES
#15528
<`Stevie> missed a great weekend fire
<firemoo> i coudln't possibly have had a better weekend
<`Stevie> get laid?
<firemoo> even better!
<firemoo> irc :]
#210672
-> From Ultor, to House:
- a friend back at RPI built a "headache generator". He read that the resonant
- frequency of sinus cavities is in the mid-30KHz range and built an oscillator
- to produce that and put it in the heat vents going to the upstairs
- apartment where they were prone to play really loud thumpa-thumpa music.
#304516
<Sebas> When I was working as an orderpicker, I had to get some assorted terrycloth towels. "Terrycloth" in Dutch is "badstof", and both that and "assorted" get abbreviated, so on my list it said I needed 5 "bad ass towels".