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#25197
<rogue2> a diablo SV just pulled in to my parking lot
<rogue2> it's michael bolton driving the diablo
<Snow> Did Michael Bolton really just drive a Lamborghini Diablo into your parking lot?
<Snow> That's so absurd it's actually believable.
<Snow> Oh, I have to go. Edward James Olmos just pulled into my drive way in a Panoz Roadster.
#69910
<@Sid> see
<@Sid> it's possible that she wasn't killed on the third
<@Sid> and she met up with hans reiser a coupla days later
<@HrdwrBoB> true
<@Sid> and he killed her to death in the passenger seat of his honda
<@HrdwrBoB> or transported the body
<@HrdwrBoB> unlikely death in car
<@HrdwrBoB> it would have been messy
<@Sid> then laid the bits of corpse out in the woods in a nice b-tree, for O(log(n)) retrieval later
Comment: irc.ragingfist.net
#307868
<Greed> You guys wanna hear something fucked?
<olleman> we're on the internet, after all
koala_bot waits for it
<Greed> The previous owner of my cell phone number died in a car crash involving a drunk driver.
<Greed> His mom, who has dementia, calls me 10-14 times per week and leaves messages asking when 'Thomas' is going to come home and stop dallying around with his friends
<Greed> Or when he's going to come vistit her
<Greed> Or asking Thomas what's for dinner
<Greed> Or pleading with him to call her more
<olleman> dude.
<Greed> And if I pick up the number and explain to her that I'm not Thomas
<Suppa_Spic> :3
<Greed> She'll argue and cry and plead with me to stop messing with her
<Greed> And this happens on almost a daily basis
<Greed> Sometimes she'll call me at 2AM and ask me where I am
<Greed> Why I'm not at home eating cornbread
<olleman> that is heart breaking
<Suppa_Spic> Greed: tell her her son is dead
<Greed> And when I pick up the phone now and again and tell her that she has the wrong number, that Thomas isn't even part of this world anymore
<Greed> She gets angry and even more sad and yells at me to stop playing sick games with her
<Greed> And because of the Dementia, she doesn't remember each encounter the next day
<Greed> Every day is just a replay of the day before he died for her
<WordpressNoob> wait
<WordpressNoob> your number is tied to your phone not a SIM?
<WordpressNoob> get off CDMA man
<Greed> Google Voice.
<Greed> Actually no, the number she calls is the phone's
<chiper> I'd have gotten a new number a long time ago
<Greed> Nobody else knows that number but she and I
<Greed> I mean
<Greed> I can't do that
<Greed> I don't know what it would do to her if every time she called him (Once or twice a day), she got a dead line
#40138
<Coyote> "The U.S. motto, E pluribus unum, means "out of many, one." It first appeared in a Roman poem as part of a recipe for making a salad.
#833
<timmo> i got a lego fetish whats it to ya?
<iMike-> damn norwegian toy companies
<McMoo> it's danish
<iMike-> what the hell is that
<iMike-> danland?
#45867
<nV`StOkE> If /quit and /connect are swimming in the ocean, and /connect gets eaten by a shark, who's left?
<ToiletDuck-pwny-> /quit is
<nV`StOkE> wtf.
* nV`StOkE has quit IRC (Quit: is)
Comment: #pubmasters
#2118
<spazzer> paul is sad because he had a bout of premature ejaculation
<tobdude> everytime I think of premature ejaculation... I think like a gun going off without anybody firing it... like you are walking along... and BAM!@
<tobdude> oh crap! I just ejactulated myself
#32456
<+BaD-CoMpAnY> The only British idiom I know is that fag means cigarette.
<@Seraph> Then someone tell this cigarette to shut up.
#296104
Forggy: my kitten is almost cat sized now
CorbinFox: uh oh, better put it in the freezer then. the cold makes things contract
CorbinFox: that way you can keep it as a kitten forever!
Forggy: you can't play with my kitten anymore ok?
CorbinFox aw :(
#8125
<Avatar> who are you
<harold> oh fuck off avatar. i see you've found another channel to ban n00bs in :)
<Avatar> oh good, we've met
#20517
<SteamedHams> jesus christ, it's not like insulting zirc is blasphemy for gods sake
<SteamedHams> fucking hell
<SteamedHams> moses cunt
<SteamedHams> apostle gayrape
#24625
<cioxx> !fact
<Infomastr> Fact: A group of whales is called a pod.
<cioxx> whoa
<cioxx> a group of internet enabled whales is called... an iPod
#56737
dansSUCHaniceguy: Dude, you ever do something and you just know it's wrong?
dansSUCHaniceguy: The whole time you're telling yourself, This is WRONG
dansSUCHaniceguy: Just going through with it, doubt and guilt eating away at you but you do it anyway
gravybythepint: dammit did you fuck kyle's girlfriend
dansSUCHaniceguy: Get your mind out of the gutter
dansSUCHaniceguy: I drank the last of the orange juice
#61230
scanty@SPARC: wtf am i bleeding for, i totally did not cut myself todayt
mmadia: scanty@SPARC , i'm surprised your parents never told you this ....
#9036
<DJTodd> Which is gayer? Pokemon or Pro Wrestling?
<LarsC> wrestling.
<Amoeba> Wrestling.
<jt`> wrestling.
<[prone]> wrestling.
#37489
<+swedegeek> MrDelayer, how come discussion always moves to centering around mail anatomy when you're around?
<MrDelayer> mail anatomy?
<MrDelayer> like
<MrDelayer> postal workers
<MrDelayer> "Hey baby, nice package"
#15417
<andyd> No, I'm not being difficult
<andyd> but it is ACTUALLY IMPOSSIBLE TO BUY LICENSES FOR SOFTWARE WHEN THE LICENSES HAVE BEEN WITHDRAWN FROM SALE,
<gardron> lol
<gardron> client?
<andyd> I can't tell. For a moment I thought that it was a brick wall.
#46060
(+lab-rat) 22. What is the largest native carnivore in England?
(+lab-rat) Here's your 1st hint, the last character in the answer is: r
(+lab-rat) Here's your 2nd hint, badge_
(+sodiepop) badger
(mac23) badger
(alexC) badger
(+StiGs) badger
(TIMMY_) badger
(+Turbo) mushroom mushroom
(+lab-rat) Winner: Trainee alexC Answer: badger Time: 23.422 Streak: 1 Points: 5 WPM: 3 Rank: 37th
Comment: Gotta love trivia!
#30684
jwz: this mighty hunter is now going to go bring down a wild sandwich
#2908
<DEMI1999> ed's hit an all time high of un-understandability
<DEMI1999> <eDz0ph_gb> d0f eye ,ent n0am
#27400
<Nylad> yeah, i should probably shower before my interview at mcdonalds :P
#295055
< aLExVP> my pal just had the most freaky experience of the week
< aLExVP> we're running a small VPN network around here, normally it is a relatively quiet project
< aLExVP> about an hour or so ago he got a call from someone else on the vpn
< aLExVP> he was asking around because he and other people were being port-scanned over the net, and he was wondering if anyone else knew something about it
< aLExVP> because we normally don't port scan each other over the vpn
< aLExVP> now he was just having a little private lan party with some friends
< aLExVP> (yes he invited me too but i have a test next week and a shitload of work ahead)
< aLExVP> anyway
< aLExVP> looking around a bit they traced it to his vpn connection
< aLExVP> and after looking around a bit more they found out the scans were coming from one of the windows systems at the party
< aLExVP> the system was a mess. no anti-virus on a budget gamer pc
< aLExVP> he has a router providing VPN access to his home net
< aLExVP> they traced the source of the attack on the windows box to an IRC bot net, and from there back again to his own connection
< aLExVP> further on to his wireless router
< aLExVP> and, interrestingly, to the car in front of his house
#6217
<b[a]rt> hey guest1!
<Guest1> hi
<b[a]rt> what's up?
<Guest1> male
#2394
<McMoo> but then last year the sermon like a week before christmas was like 'CHRISTMAS ISN'T ABOUT PRESENTS - OUR ONE TRUE PRESENT IS JESUS CHRIST!!!'
<McMoo> my dad didn't even get my mom anything
<McMoo> she was pissed.
#45028
<@semi> opera used to be a lot faster, but the new versions really dont feel the same
<@semi> and i've gotten too used to stuff like adblock to switch to a browser that not only doesnt have it, but also has its own ads
<@semi> not just that, but those targeted ads owned me
<@semi> i clicked some link in #gnaa then the ads were trying to hook me up with tranny dating services and sell me discretely packaged high heels.