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#19294
<@Specialst> i wanna talk to this chick... ahhh SHIT... i think someone is shoooting at our hosue.brb
#55179
<davie> Man ms. turnhill is a hottie
<spiffy_> umm you mean your physics teacher?
<davie> Yeah man she loves me
<davie> Like today, I bumped into her
<davie> I said "hi"
<davie> She said "hello, how are you doing?"
<davie> I said "Im alright"
<davie> She said "that's good"
<davie> BAM I'm in!
#311132
<l0de> I've done that before. I made a script that cycled through
<l0de> 8==D ( )
<l0de> 8(=)
<l0de> while listening to Björk. But it was probably the lowest point in my life.
#8716
<relapse> what distribution are you running
<aur__> windows
#3249
BogoMips: trying to figure out why my scanner isn't installed
BogoMips: AHH.. NOT PLUGGED IN TO THE COMPUTER HAHAH
BogoMips: i wonder how i even manage to feed myself sometimes
#27435
<%AnkkaBlaa> swedish rodeo: fucking a girl doggy-style and whispering to her ear: "I have AIDS.." and trying to keep your penis inside her
#30861
<madsic> I used to give my cell phone #
<madsic> when I took channels
<madsic> topic "wanna cry? call 514-XXX-XXXX"
<madsic> people would call
<madsic> and like
<madsic> Ive been working on this channel for years
<madsic> you are ruining it
<mp`> hahahahhahahhahaha
#4224
<quisling> bwahaha, I was looking through some personals and this chick's username is "responsible" but she's 20 with a child...
#302136
<@CESSMASTA> "rape risk rise for cambodia women"
<@CESSMASTA> i like alliteration and all but that headline strikes me as a tad unprofessional
<@dbelange> Cambodian Cooch Caper Count Climbing
#57019
<Malphas> How many femanists does it take to change a light bulb?
<@Cassie> Oh no
<Malphas> Two. One to change the bulb and the other to suck my dick.
*** You have been kicked from #Womens_Issues
#2396
(`zero) ,__ FISH RULE AT DICKSUCKING
(`zero) | `'. / BECAUSE WE DON'T HAVE
(`zero) __ |`-._/_.:---`-.._ / TO STOP TO BREATHE
(`zero) \='. _/..--'`__ `'-._
(`zero) \- '-.--"` === / o `',
(`zero) )= ( .--_ | _.' (HURF DUH GILLS)
(`zero) /_=.'-._ {=_-_ | .--`-.
(`zero) /_.' `\`'-._ '-= \ _.'
(`zero) jgs ) _.-'`'-.. _..-'`
(`zero) /_.' `/";';`|
(`zero) \` .'/
#51274
<patours> my ftp is yours :)
<Pnuts> oooooh
<Pnuts> I like when you talk dirty
<patours> lol
<JU5TICE> Nothing like hammering an ftp until the early morning. "Take my big files, you dirty virus ridden server"
<JU5TICE> Apparently
<Jose`> who's your admin
<Jose`> yeah
<Jose`> thats right
<Jose`> who's your admin!
#308521
<Pryoidain> I saw the new (old) arp-ing joke post on qdb, and just for a split second of amusement, set every device on my network to have the same IP as my laptop.
<Pryoidain> Now in my head, the intended result was for my lil ultrabook to ask the router "Hey who am I? Here's my IP." and think it had suddenly become a sun box
<Pryoidain> "THE COMPUTER IS THE NETWORK, I AM ALL OF YOU"
<Pryoidain> In reality, I turned the next 57 minutes of my monday morning into a frantic scrabbling to get the network back functional before I had to leave for work, and ended up giving myself a migraine.
#4174
<PapiChu1o> i only like DreamWeaver because it takes away the pain of staring at text
<S5474> I use a text based editor because it takes the pain away of pointing and clicking ;)
#2329
<LPCx> hrm alabama has some IT jobs
<HenryV> heh
<HenryV> you'd need a new suit though
<HenryV> one of them kkk things
<LPCx> to bad i wouldn't fit in my sisters are allready married :|
<HenryV> doh!
#28361
<Zippy2> im a poor sob
<Zippy2> having enough to live would be nice
<think> sell your extensive dildo collection
<Ooter> good idea
<Zippy2> think
<Zippy2> i cant sell it for much
<Zippy2> theyve got shit stains on them
<think> stick em in the dishwasher
#1049
(s|urpee) haha yuh me hakz0r the university gibson
(s|urpee) one day
(s|urpee) I was like hakz0ring it and stuff
(s|urpee) and I was like emailing support@cc and shit
(s|urpee) and then he emailed me back and told me to notify the lab guy that the comp next to me needed rebooting
#3581
<Slant> In the process of arguing for chinese food
<Slant> I appear to have slipped my guilt in .. err .. inability to cook food.
<Slant> If it reaches the complexity of boiling water, I don't have the attention span.
<Slant> As such, we have had a few vict.. err .. accidents around the house.
<Slant> So it looks like I'll be eating ramen tonight. Worse, I'll be eating it carefully monitored.
#640
<Techbert> What does 'goatse' mean, anyway?
#14351
<malcolm> I would appreciate it more if I didn't have to set JAVA_HOME and ANT_HOME and HILL_DEPTH and AVERAGE_LIFESPAN_OF_INSECT and NUMBER_OF_LEGS and DIRECTION_OF_PREVAILING_WIND and BIRTHDAY
#2118
<spazzer> paul is sad because he had a bout of premature ejaculation
<tobdude> everytime I think of premature ejaculation... I think like a gun going off without anybody firing it... like you are walking along... and BAM!@
<tobdude> oh crap! I just ejactulated myself
#2290
<eldee> finding wiring diagrams on the web isnt fun at all
<eldee> because.. you really dont find any wiring diagrams
<eldee> just porn.. how wiring diagrams and porn can be confused in a search engine, i've yet to discover
#1470
<isocat> onion headlines make me laugh out loud, even if i have my cock in my hand
#1355
<McGrue> The truth, like a penis, sometimes slips out at inopportune times.
#14625
(@Cloud7): CACK OR HOTDOG
(@Cloud7): THAT IS THE QUESTION
(@RaiNiNG): hotdog tastes better
(@Cloud7): i doubt it