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#9961
<CWO_LEADER_XPUNK> He wants to be klined, I dont wanna know if thats a sexual thing or what
#143
<`BuM> why is it that, no matter how much you pee into the toilet it never fills up?
#141301
< grey> So I had an idea today
< grey> of something that could amuse me, if only because I know out there somewhere, someone else would laugh
< grey> I want to get an ebay username of something creepy, like "WatchingU.P", then buy stuff like a telescope or pinhole camera, then leave feedback like "A+++, Fast Shipping, You should get that mole checked!"
#25660
<tito> why can't they make longer-lasting laptop batteries? ;[
<jestuh> why can't they make longer-lasting titos?
<tito> whats that supposed to mean
<jestuh> you know
#56888
<dizzy_> BlueInferno why did you give up on christianity?
<BlueInferno> dizzy_, I read the bible.
#35842
<Markaci> HOW DID I GET HERE?!
* Rick_Hunter hasn't a clue.
<Rick_Hunter> I've often wondered that myself.
<enkie> in the beginning
<enkie> there was an egg
<enkie> and a happy sperm
<Pb> lol
<enkie> and the happy sperm was the lucky sperm, cause it beat out the rest of the hapless flaccid hopelessly undermotivated sperm
#25343
*** Quits: Light^NG (i got chikz in da livin' room gettin' it on, and they ain't leavin' 'till six 'n the morn')
<rhythm> what the fuck
<rhythm> i wanna go to his house
#12395
<@Blackout> is it ok to masturbate and irc at the same time, what ya guys think
<@fragge> dont aim your cum on my nick
#29120
<Firefly> Time for my prayers:
<Firefly> Our Father, who 0wnz heaven, j00 r0ck!
<Firefly> May all 0ur base someday be belong to you!
<Firefly> May j00 0wn earth just like j00 0wn heaven.
<Firefly> Give us this day our warez, mp3z, and pr0n through a phat pipe.
<Firefly> And cut us some slack when we act like n00b lamerz, just as we teach n00bz when they act lame on us.
<Firefly> Please don't give us root access on some poor d00d'z box when we're too pissed off to think about what's right and wrong, and if you could keep the fbi off our backs, we'd appreciate it.
<Firefly> For j00 0wn r00t on all our b0x3s 4ever and ever, 4m3n.
#30642
<Tyme> u aren't cooking are ya?
<MaTriX-> i can cook damn well
<Tyme> so can I...I used to cook up hamslice in kuwait and give it to the iraqi kids tellling them it was chicken...I was such a good cook they never knew the difference
<Tyme> hehe, we did toss them fuckers alot of ham slice
<Tyme> I sure as hell hope there isn't an allah, else i'm fucked
#301318
<@Warrigal> I just realized that compilers reproduce asexually. This is possibly the most awesome moment of my life.
#16544
<Cole`> I think there might have been a guy at my ptq who crapped his pants. During round 5 I had a bunch of people watching my match and all of a sudden I caught the scent of crap. I yelled out "Who in God's name shit their pants?!" A few people laughed, but I didn't catch the shitter. So round 6 I am playing this guy and he smelled...like shit. I did in fact recall him saying he wanted to go home and take a bath. I felt really horrible for this.
#3658
* auslandr pokes lint in the eye
<EigenLint> no poking.
* auslandr stabs lint in the eye
<auslandr> better?
#45221
<Lost> wow this is so retarted
<Lost> my main computer
<Lost> needs a new video card
<Tenor> ? Lost
<Lost> flys got inside my computer and cloged everything up
<Lost> like
<Lost> tons of them
<Tenor> how the fuck did that happen
<Lost> and burnt out my video card
<Lost> I have no screen on my window
<Lost> and I have LED lights
<Lost> so I guess they go near the LED fan
<Lost> and get sucked in
#33754
<phoxxy> i was on the phone with a company for my business that was in Tennesee. the guy was trying to tell me information over the phone. i aksed if they had a website and he goes "Well, I didn't offer to give you our website information because I didn't think you had internet in Indiana."
* phoxxy was like WTF!?
* phoxxy has a T1 in her home mother fucker
<Puchu> indiana has no internet
<GorgeousOrifice> Indiana's all backwards and shit
<phoxxy> when I told the guy I had a T1 at home, he goes "Is that like dial-up?"
Comment: logged on #fark
#9946
<MpTaNk> my mom was telling me to do a whole bunch of stuff at once and my first thought was to tell her to stop flooding me
#34305
<Slew> I tried to calculate how many times better firefox was than IE, but my calculator broke
Comment: #ZFGC @ metal.shellux.net
#302050
<Beanuritos> No way, I'm lazier than any of you.
<zetatech> i was so lazy earlier that while masturbating i just pretended i came
<Beanuritos> ...
<MorkDB> ...
<Beanuritos> respect
#9337
<reflexive> i hate how in the movies.. they still show catholic churches, where the priest places the communion on the tongue.
<heath> he normally just puts his cock on there now.
#150040
Erica: Boy name is Easton Thomas. But i got sucked into that. Lol
uuang: Did your boyfriend choose it?
Erica: Yes. He likes the first name cuz he likes basebal and It's a name brand for baseball equipment.
uuang: oh god.. im sorry thats a terrible reason to choose a name. I love mac and cheese but im not naming any kids I have Kraft.
#26217
<^{[Dr-Dre]}^> Deos anyone know where i can host a site that supports ASP for free?
<ApoIIyon> insecurehosts.com
<^{[Dr-Dre]}^> ok thanks
#301562
bakayuki@live.com: i kinda want to explain to her about the positrons in bananas
bakayuki@live.com: and see if i can get her to think eating moar bananas will slow down time...
FRIN NY KAO: do it
baka.yuki@live.com: if she comes in tomorrow shoving bananas down her throat i win at life
FRIN NY KAO: /awesom
FRIN NY KAO: do it
baka.yuki@live.com: already talking to her
baka.yuki@live.com: i'm backing it up with fancy science problems
baka.yuki@live.com: which is actually just my chem homework
FRIN NY KAO: HAHAHAHA
baka.yuki@live.com: i just showed her an mole-balanced equation for how iron and water become rust
FRIN NY KAO: oh wow
baka.yuki@live.com: and explained that was the pime taradox equation
baka.yuki@live.com: if she runs in to another /b/ tard he's gonna have a field day
FRIN NY KAO: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
baka.yuki@live.com: she's an english major
baka.yuki@live.com: of course she is
FRIN NY KAO: you're bullshitting
FRIN NY KAO: she bought it?
baka.yuki@live.com: why didn't i think of that
baka.yuki@live.com: she took it hook line and sinker
baka.yuki@live.com: "oh so thats why i feel so slow and bloated when i eat to many bananas"
baka.yuki@live.com: i almost couldn't keep a straight face
FRIN NY KAO: aw dude
baka.yuki@live.com: "yes exactly, the sodium is slowing down your time sphere"
FRIN NY KAO: ever seen commercials for 'the invention of lying'?
baka.yuki@live.com: nope
FRIN NY KAO: oh
FRIN NY KAO: tl;dr
FRIN NY KAO: THE WORLD IS GOING TO END UNLESS WE HAVE SEX RIGHT NOW
FRIN NY KAO: response?
FRIN NY KAO: do we have time to get to a motel room?
FRIN NY KAO: that woman
FRIN NY KAO: is banana girl
baka.yuki@live.com: she's going on and on about odd experiences she's had with bananas
baka.yuki@live.com: i'm having
FRIN NY KAO: oh
baka.yuki@live.com: real issues
FRIN NY KAO: god
baka.yuki@live.com: not laughing
baka.yuki@live.com: like i can feel my face contorting
FRIN NY KAO: if she asks you whats wrong
FRIN NY KAO: you should just say
baka.yuki@live.com: i ate a banana
FRIN NY KAO: im sorry, you're just a total idiot
baka.yuki@live.com: no i told her i ate a banana and then an orange earlier
baka.yuki@live.com: and now they're duking it out
FRIN NY KAO: what
baka.yuki@live.com: she bought it
baka.yuki@live.com: and feels bad for the orange
FRIN NY KAO: i feel bad for her parents
baka.yuki@live.com: oh thank god
baka.yuki@live.com: she's leaving
baka.yuki@live.com: HAHAHAHAHAHA
baka.yuki@live.com: i WIN
baka.yuki@live.com: "Well I wanna go to the cafeteria to get some bananas, I have an exam this afternoon and a few more hours would be nice"
FRIN NY KAO: OH GOD
FRIN NY KAO: ARE YOU FUCKING SERIOUS
baka.yuki@live.com: I told her she wont physically notice the difference but to just keep eating them
baka.yuki@live.com: you can't make this shit up
FRIN NY KAO: oh god
baka.yuki@live.com: how do these people function
FRIN NY KAO: iunno
baka.yuki@live.com: the guy in the cube next to me heard the whole conversation
baka.yuki@live.com: he just asked to shake my hand
FRIN NY KAO: HAHAHAHAHA
baka.yuki@live.com: "I want to shake the hand of the man, who is the greatest troll I have ever met"
FRIN NY KAO: remember that comment about another /b/tard?
FRIN NY KAO: well, you met him rather than her
FRIN NY KAO: fuck
FRIN NY KAO: you won so hard
FRIN NY KAO: you found the motherfucking holy grail
baka.yuki@live.com: i want her number so I can like
baka.yuki@live.com: have something to do when bored
baka.yuki@live.com: just call her up and troll her
FRIN NY KAO: "hey, water causes you to develop tumors faster"
baka.yuki@live.com: the feeling bad for the orange
baka.yuki@live.com: that
baka.yuki@live.com: that about killed me
#31823
<ihatestan> god I hate my little brother
<ihatestan> its my mothers birthday and I got her a Amethyst necklace
<ihatestan> than out of no where my brother goes "mom has +3 strengh"
#31883
<illkid> can someone help me? i am wanting to use a model in the game, but my model is called pipe.mdl, and the game is looking for pipe2.mdl
<illkid> how can i get it to load the pipe.mdl?
<illkid> are there any renaming applications out there for renaming files? so i can change the pipe.mdl to pipe2.mdl?
<Ez3ki41> did you try jsut renaming hte pipe model to pipe2.mdl
<Khanate> lool
<illkid> i would like to, but where can i find a program to do that?
<Khanate> windows
<illkid> can i get that on kazaa?
<Khanate> ...
<illkid> ok, i found a "windows95" i am going to install that and see if it works..
<Sh1mms> ????
<Sh1mms> wtf
#55564
<Swishy> the star trek article on wikipedia
<Swishy> is larger than the intercourse article
<Swishy> SURPRISE!