Random | Latest | Best | Full Site
#310713
<Somasis> peter anvin has a pet python named perl
<tanderson> since it's a python, perl can C its tail, but because of the forked tongue it speaks with a lisp; his mother Julia always corrected him, but unfortunately was bash'ed in the head by an accidentally dropped cup of java.
<Somasis> oh my god
<tanderson> Thank you, I'll be here all week
<Somasis> that was just criminal
<tanderson> He was sed for a time, but decided to go forth and ultimately met Ada, gave her a ruby ring, and lived happily ever after.
<Somasis> STOP
#10793
<CrushWork> hes got that "im a barbarin caveman who eats snails and says ooga booga" style look to him
<Jed> "I'm a barbarian caveman that eats snails, says ooga booga and lays cable for a living"
#49882
<utonium> * QUESTION * 302975 of 341350, worth 10 points: how many equal sides are there on a scalene triangle?
<utonium> Answer: ....
<mannyt> four
<utonium> Answer: .o..
<Missl337> four
<witchyp00> 4
<Missl337> none
<Missl337> duh
#16512
<KagoniKnight>: You know how sometimes a dog humps your leg?
<Pong-Chan>: .....
<KagoniKnight>: Well, sometimes, why not hump back and show who's boss!!
#52768
< specsmu> calculus and women go hand in hand
< specsmu> it's applied calculus to find the area under a curve.
#1176
(jayo) heh, apparently when i was 4 my dad took me to the pool, i saw a black guy and said "hey dad.. its michael jackson"
#2770
<VmprHntrD> magic: the gathering of lower lifeforms
#52518
<nox>I was sitting on the bus on my way to school and couldn’t help pausing my iPod for this one:
<nox>Black man #1: Yo! Whut the fuck are you lookin’ at?!
<nox>Black (business suit wearing) man #2: Would it hurt for you to speak respectably to others?
<nox>Black man #1: Nigga whut? Are you black? You looks black, but dat must just be black paint on yo skin!
<nox>Black (business suit wearing) man #2: Nevermind. I appologize. I’m sorry.
<nox>Black man #1: You sorry?! Don’t say sorry to me! Say sorry to yo momma!!! Call her up right now! Say sorry dat you lost yo real color!
Comment: .derekilicious @ wordpress
#3751
<djcrom> TOMORROW IS MY BIRTHDAY
<djcrom> I ACCEPT VISA, MASTERCARD, AND WEED.
#29631
(joe) what do or did you do wedsday dil?
(@Dilandou) i dressed in drag and hung around in bars.
(@Dilandou) why?
? Joins: joe-y (joe@dialup-171.75.103.181.Dial1.Cincinnati1.Level3.net)
(joe-y) stupid dialup ...what was ur answer?
(@Dilandou) i did some php coding. why?
#38975
<@splice> this channel isnt primarily left-wing, its primarily wantstoargue
Comment: #ramen
#8287
<Adiemus-Away> [GleebAway] Adiemus has returned from doing the dishes (Away for 1day 15hrs 23mins 39secs)
*** Adiemus-Away is now known as Adiemus
<Adiemus> damn that's a lot of dishes =\
#5805
<evenpar123> I am so going to be moderated for that last comment...
<mightyflo> console wars are stupid. people that get involved with console wars are even stupidder
<evenpar123> Console wars? I was just giving some information, and making fun of the fact that his parents don't love each other anymore
#39758
<@crustgod> dude I fucked up again today
<@Xanthi> ?
<@crustgod> some chick was hitting on me, she said like "you can't resist me" and I was like "yeah I can" and she was like "not if I put your head between my legs" and I was like "I don't care, I'm nekro"
<@crustgod> =(
<@Xanthi> ..
Comment: #blackdeath-cult
#8471
<sisko> Q. What's the height of conceit?
<sisko> A. Having an orgasm and calling out your own name.
<mmm> i do that
<mmm> "oh god"
#30476
<+Thief> never pack when ur high..you get there u open your bag and nothing matches...all u have to wear is a hawaiian shirt, an oven mit + a lava lamp...the rest is filled with cookie dough + hot wheels trucks
Comment: Random quote, GamesNet channel.
#7901
* Argent- changes topic to '<beth> IRN has visions of me on my knees, cock in hand, looking up with huge brown eyes, saying "m-mister.. are you sure this is right?"'
#309533
<nedbat> [Tritium]: you youngsters and your kidding...
<nedbat> get off my lawn!
<[Tritium]> But im not done mowing it....did you forget you paid me to do that?
<[Tritium]> is this even your house?
#298929
<ehird> erm, presumably two processes have a reason to talk
<ehird> or are you writing "blind date OS"
#299900
<@pyna> i read a survey of all the ways they spell khadafi
<@pyna> theres dozens
< pgp> the only thing gadaffi is good for is testing regular expressions
< pgp> M[ou]'?am+[ae]r .*([AEae]l[- ])? [GKQ]h?[aeu]+([dtz][dhz]?)+af[iy]
#254207
<+GaidinBDJ> What format should a resignation letter be if the letter is neither required nor expected?
<smadge1> SMS
Comment: #fark
#60103
<cpukiller> lol I was visiting a local university the other day with my school and shit
<cpukiller> anyhow
<cpukiller> the 'tour guide' showed us iMac G3's
<cpukiller> and he was on about how these computers were so superior to any recent modern P4
<cpukiller> and how they had "billions more pixels"
<liquidplasmaflow> roflcopter
<cpukiller> and how the hardware for these G3's were so much more expensive
<cpukiller> anyhow
<cpukiller> this dude coursed computer sciences .
<liquidplasmaflow> ...
<liquidplasmaflow> rethinking your school of choice?
<cpukiller> Yah, needless to say he changed his major over to Tourism and Hospitality
<cpukiller> this never was a school of choice, I was just visiting it 'cause they gave us free food and we got to see the corpses med students fuck around with
#5592
<bytraper> you idiots!!!
<Synoptica> yeah i confess
#1830
<Acero> i dont know no strippers no more
<Acero> that was when i hung out in the ghetto
<Acero> but now i drive a nice car, so i dont go there
#3770
<kolby> man I am getting layed so many times this weekend
<kolby> I don't care how tired my hand gets.