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#30237
<Tim_Kwan> ROBAT DON'T U HAVE ANYTHING BETTER TO DO?
<ROBAT> YES
<ROBAT> I AM DOING 5 THINGS AT ONCE
<ROBAT> 1 OF THEM IS YOUR MOM
Comment: That was just wrong >.<
#5777
<prym> little did i know later in my life id come to terms with things like
31337, 69, and 187
#1674
<SlimZ> i like my pickup line
<SlimZ> "move i need to get a drink"
#60788
<Haohmaru77> a woman enters a vibrators shop,
<Haohmaru77> and shes all excited
<Haohmaru77> so she asks the vendor
<Haohmaru77> "do you sell vibrators?"
<Haohmaru77> and the guys like "yes"
<Haohmaru77> so the girl asks
<Haohmaru77> "do you know how they work?"
<Haohmaru77> and the guys like "yes"
<ichi_nii_san> .....
<Haohmaru77> so the girl, all excited, asks
<Haohmaru77> "could you tell me how to turn it off?"
#20586
<killjoy> i'm leaving smooshed bug guts on the top corner of my monitor as an example of what will happen if any other bug should attempt to cross into my domain.
#29831
xerim(9:05:57): Hey, guess what?
hgd0g(9:06:31): lemme guess...
hgd0g(12:44:28): i'm still guessing...
xerim(12:47:12): You're gay, dude.
hgd0g(12:47:17): damn. i was close.
#19506
<jwz> I think the world is full of tattoo artists who did not learn the lesson that spiderman tried to teach us
<jwz> "with great power comes great responsibility"
#1507
<nexxai> man, I love having hookups
<MTrez> found someone who works in an abnormally large dildo factory?
#310227
<@NWH> Random thought: Do Facebook users who like the movie "The Social Network" get put on a secret blacklist?
#295110
<Lync> oooooooookaaaaaaaay that was weird
<Lync> I just got called by someone at random who just went "what...a...dick...you...are" then hung up
<Lync> someone I don't even know amusingly either o.o
<TR> Sounds like they know you though.
#30454
(Sprite): boiled egg?
(Sprite): im a spack cook
(LoneGun): sprite just do in microwave for like 2 mins
(Sprite): on it's own lonegun ?
(LoneGun): aye sprite
(Ched): 2 mins
(Ched): for 650 watt microwave
(Sprite): so a egg, in a bowl, on it's own for 2 mins in a microwave ?
(Sprite): n1 im off to cook
(Sprite): k guys
(Sprite): u guys are cocks
(Sprite): the egg just blow up
Comment: Cooking in #digwar (quakenet) with the unsuspecting sprite. His cullinary skills are now renowned as a result.
#207696
<@nalle-> css <3
<@gatan> cs <3
<@exz_> c <3
#7177
<Tyson> kegs rule
<Tyson> im gonna marry one
<Mousey> ill have an affair with it
#306550
<+snacky> being white is awesome. you can easily get adequate vitamin d intake even if you live really far north
<+snacky> and if you need camouflage, you can blend in with snow
<DirtySouth> lol
<DirtySouth> cant say i ever seen someone try that
<+snacky> exactly.
#6717
<WinTek> whats a good efnet server?
<Julie2> thats an oxymoron
<ToidyMan> WinTek, good and efnet don't belong in the same sentence
<F`Nar> they don't belong on the same internet
#51643
<ryan`> god i fucking rule
<ryan`> my brother stole money from me
<ryan`> so i mixed elmers glue with a bit of water
<ryan`> then i spread some over my sisters little hand puppets
<ryan`> and threw it half way under his bed
<ryan`> now hes grounded all next week for "jacking off with her hand puppets"
#29888
<wardrobe> The following NEW packages will be installed:
<wardrobe> emacsen-common libcompfaceg1 libpq3 xemacs21 xemacs21-basesupport
<wardrobe> xemacs21-bin xemacs21-mule xemacs21-mulesupport xemacs21-support
<wardrobe> 0 upgraded, 9 newly installed, 0 to remove and 4 not upgraded.
<wardrobe> Need to get 29.9MB of archives.
<wardrobe> After unpacking 93.4MB of additional disk space will be used.
<wardrobe> NINETY THREE MEGS FOR A TEXT EDITOR
Comment: Quite.
#134490
<Soccerbum> around novemberish
<Soccerbum> i through some pumpkin seeds down the sink by mistake...
<Soccerbum> well today, i just found a plant growing in our drain.
<Soccerbum> <_<
#17002
<ryano> i ain't drank dick for shit in months
<reston> try a lemondrop bodyshot
<reston> get some fly bitch and rub sugar on her tummy... lick it, take a shot of vodka
<reston> and then eat a lemon
<jonathans> is that some kind of homosexual alternative to tequila shots
<reston> yea jon
<reston> but its good
<jonathans> sugar instead of salt
<jonathans> lemon instead of lime
<jonathans> a chick instead of your hand
<jonathans> its beginning to make sense to me.
#54895
<HotStud> what i want is for you to stop screwing with my head and start screwing with my dick!
<ingenue> Okay, box it up and mail it USPS, and my girlfriend and I will give it a try.
<ingenue> Oh, wait, what size battery does it take? 'Cos I think my AA are all dead.
<HotStud> ...
<HotStud> goddam lezbo
<HotStud> you just haven't had the right man, then youd learn that there are some things a chick just can't do
<ingenue> You know, that could work for you, too...
#900
<D1> why does cs give me that purple screen once I get out of one game and start a new one?
<D1> WHY WHY WHY
* |Chris away ..(autoaway).. (On/l)(Off/p)
<D1> don't hide behind your petty autoaways
#61
<Guilty> Really, celerons make me laugh
<Guilty> The white trash chip
#54036
<+lax> i feel like an asshole
<+lax> at lunch we couldnt decide if this person was a girl or boy
<+lax> i said it was a girl
<+lax> and so we all chipped in a dollar
<+lax> and someone went over and asked
<+lax> and she started crying
#3650
(@watchy): hey io
(@watchy): i am gonna put up a ebay auction
(@watchy): i'm gonna auction my sperm
(@watchy): haha
*** Quits: watchy (Excess Flood)
(@[IO]): or not
#30638
***EvilSpork declares you all to be extremely sophisticated Eliza programs
aykroyd: how does extremely sophisticated Eliza programs make you feel?