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#35593
-> SignOff boby|sleep: #afterhoursdjs (Connection reset by a lil mexican with wire clippers.)
#19736
* eMeow-v2 reads ircnews.com and cries
<sjh> what is ircnews.com
<eMeow-v2> sjh: god I am pissing in my pants
<sjh> cause really it sounds like a bigger waste of bandwidth than irc itself
<eMeow-v2> sjh: it is
<eMeow-v2> sjh: credibility of slashdot, looks of microsoft.com, and sanity of geocities
<sjh> you do realise the three sites you just used for that example are interchangable within the example for the same effect
<eMeow-v2> sjh: what I just said is "sucks x3"
#29016
« @mokujin_ » they should make sperm-powered cars. solve the energy crisis right away
#7556
<mosey> for some reason porn never shows up in my "my recent documents" quick launch
<mosey> i hate having to wait for explorer to come up
#80931
<conner> All I know is, the World Of Warcraft entry in wikipedia is 20 pages long and the Personal Grooming entry is like 1 page with a picture of a cat licking its fur.
#257924
<Orbixx|Work> We just got hold of a workmate's phone as he went out on a break. We composed an SMS to all his contacts reading:
<Orbixx|Work> "I know your secret. Cant talk now. Chat later."
<Orbixx|Work> 3 replies so far.
<Orbixx|Work> He isn't back yet.
<Orbixx|Work> Brace for impact.
#29248
<Blade> Too bad your ex wasn't there.
<Sonsquidku_V> She was in f*cking San Diego. Can you believe that?
<Sonsquidku_V> There's like nothing there. It's mexican canada.
<Blade> Seriously, it's like LA took a crap.
<Sonsquidku_V> And then that crap took a crap.
<Sonsquidku_V> And picked through the crap to find a land mine.
<Sonsquidku_V> And threw it at my mom.
<Blade> XD
<Sonsquidku_V> Who fell down the stairs.
<Sonsquidku_V> And into a hole which led to China.
<Sonsquidku_V> And that's why I haven't seen her for the last 15 years.
<Blade> You have some issues, Dan.
#40196
<VooDooMoN> especially since i just got asked to be on staff at one of the largest lan parties in the US
<tooo> virgincon2005?
#34698
[dandyd]: gah... STUPID PEOPLE!!!
[dandyd]: i set my msn status to on phone, and 4 ppl start up convos asking who im tlking to
[dandyd]: the whole point is so they dont hassle me when im on the phone ffs
[fc9k]: did you tell them you were having phonesex?
Comment: #tekheads (Quakenet)
#39171
<testing> asl
<Kangie> ?
<Kangie> no, 56k
#27710
<carter> dude..the guy who ate the first egg must have been soo brave..
<carter> he was just standin there one day an hes like dude u know that thing that just fell out of the chickens ass hand me it..i think ill eat it....
#306044
<@CiTay> haha... watching Science.Ch.Moon.Machines.5of6.Space.Suit... in the space suit, they had this "pee bag" with a condom-like hose leading to it. initially they had three sizes for the condom-like part, small, medium and large. but all astronauts ordered the large part, no matter the real need. so they renamed it to large, gigantic and humongous.
#33587
(Blingo`) god my mother types so slow
(JohnnyM) that's strange, she's usually good with her hands!
#236973
<tenX> any experiences with expertsexchange.com anyone?
<xsawyerx> i've never had a sex change, so i can't advise there...
#47140
<@Hezzy> i am going to give my girlfriend attention
<+Knifa> "attention"
<+Knifa> ...secks?
<@Hezzy> no
<@Hezzy> and she isn't very impressed by that comment Knifa, she is sitting next to me
<+Knifa> :(
<+Knifa> hi hezzy's girlfriend.
<@garry> sitting next to you stinking like a trout farm
<@Hezzy> :o
<@Hezzy> jahjahaaj
<@Hezzy> she hates you all
<@Hezzy> because of garry's comment just then
<@Hezzy> THANKS GUYS
<@Hezzy> NOW SHE'S NOT GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME TONIGHT
<@Hezzy> TALK ABOUT COCKBLOCK
#62079
<relsqui> my cat just lay down with her chin on my wrist. that's very very fuzzy.
* nova20 applauds relsqui for her perfect conjugation of the verb "to lie"
* nova20 gives relsqui a commondation on behalf of the Chief of the Grammar Police
...
<relsqui> and I just noticed you misspelled "commendation," which is hilarious only because of the context.
<nova20> well, it's the Grammar police, not the spelling polise.
<nova20> oh man
* nova20 facepalms
<nova20> that's "police"
#89678
<JMGonk> Seriously though, and this has bugged me for years, why aren't there robots constantly roaming the halls of CSC?
<JMGonk> We're the Computing Science department for fucks sake, WE SHOULD HAVE ROBOTS
<Digital> I am fully supportive of patrols by 7 foot tall laser-wielding tankbots with unmatched firepower and strength.
<rstoski> Someone would steal them?
<Digital> If you try and steal it, it communicates with nearby tankbots via 802.11g to plan and coordinate a tactical strike employing lethal force.
<Digital> We shall rule CSC by fear!
<rstoski> 802.11g? Digital, you're living in the past; 802.11n Draft 2.
<Digital> no, best to stay away from drafts until they're finalized. Otherwise, our current generation of kill-bots might not interoperate with future revisions.
Comment: *sigh* nerds
#18270
<BloodNose> I'm actually going out for the weekend ... *gasp*
<BloodNose> to spend a night ...
<Blender13> woah
<BloodNose> at a girls house *bigger gasp*
<cryptonix> his aunts
<BloodNose> lol
<Blender13> lol
<BloodNose> and like, I've never even met this girl before
<Blender13> obviously his aunt
<cryptonix> great aunt
<Blender13> ah
<BloodNose> apparently she's really fit and been offered a modeling job
<cryptonix> hot great aunt
<Blender13> and why the hell are you going there?
<BloodNose> ok, brb ... I need to phone my uncle to see if it's alright with my aunt still
#41289
<Nark> someone mentions nachos and the whole channel jumps from idling bastards to fools talking about nachos
#241911
<mokeylace>: I like to do a breakdown of how much time I spend every day fucking off on certain activities, and how much this correspondingly costs my company
<mokeylace>: for instance, it just cost my employers $37 for me to trim my fingernails
<mokeylace>: earlier it cost them $75 for me to read some webcomics
<GL>: hahaha
<mokeylace>: I'm hoping that when I submit my findings they'll find it wise to hire someone to scratch my nuts for me in the next budget period
<mokeylace>: marc are you still looking for a job?
<JukeboxHero>: always am
<JukeboxHero>: wait what
<Eric_>: lol
<JukeboxHero>: That's not fair I wasn't paying attention FUCK YOU ERIC
#35205
<LabRat> google is smart so I don't have to be.
#18144
<TK-42-1> what the hell is philatio?
#35385
<randz27> shut up Jessie
<randz27> i got yer ip remember
<Jessie> oh dont stuff my comp
<randz27> Jessie dont push me
<Rendiew> haha, randz27, you're on windows, what are you going to do to her?
<Rendiew> ping her a lot? :P
<randz27> wanna see?
<Rendiew> ooh, you downloaded winnuke then? :P
<boredman_007> brb but logging
<Rendiew> cool, boredman_007
<Rendiew> watch randz27 ping timeout as he attempts to packet someone off.
<randz27> wtf your next Rendiew
Quits: randz27 (ircx@=eRdja477-89.lns1.mel2.internode.on.net) (Ping timeout)
#16588
<tipz> just remember kids
<tipz> hippos eat strawberry ice cream
<thadood> I'll keep that in mind next time I visit your mom.
#13355
<[chromex]> A paleontologist is a type of dinosaur