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#6742
<ProFessional_Widow> i have back stage asses
<ProFessional_Widow> passes
#47238
<vex> so about half an hour ago i took my medication and when i was washing it down with some water i started coughing
<vex> and two minutes ago i sneezed and one of the capsules i took flew out of my nose
#16369
<esokitty> FUCKING A
<kitten> fuck a B it has more holes
#4521
<Anton> 8mm is a good film as well, but I'm puzzled as to why nicolas cage never got arrested for murder
<Alexander> hes just an actor
<Waldo> damn!
<Alexander> it wasn't real
#23916
<CommanderStab> When I was young I thought being a chemist just meant mixing random chemicals together and seeing what happened
<CommanderStab> So I wanted to be one, so when I was young I went to the bathroom and mixed together every single thing I could find
<CommanderStab> I called it "Sparkle-shine shampoo" and tested it out on myself
<CommanderStab> I've had dandruff ever since and anti-dandruff shampoo doesn't help >__<
<CommanderStab> It didn't make my hair sparkle-shine, either ;___;
#1123
<SYch0> maybe in your dreams
<SYch0> and youre pretty pathetic if you dream about me
<SYch0> :o
<MadHatter> you cease to exist as soon as I close irc
<SYch0> hah
<SYch0> which is never :|
#16694
«FivePee»: brb gotta piss and get a cock
«FivePee»: omg
«FivePee»: get a coke
«Electronut»: rofl
#14569
<Baby_Gurl16> Does any one here have a thousand dollars i could borrow to bail my boyfriend out of jail with if so please msg me
#35801
<Tres|Status> eh, i can't find a job because i spend too much time reading bash.org
#10499
* go_boy getting his haujobb on
<jej> i read that as 'handjob'
<go_boy> i assumed you would
<jej> you can always count on me.
<go_boy> for a handjob?
<jej> of course.
<go_boy> rockin.
#302032
<+MachineDog> ....crap, how do I do the action things?
<+Kitten> you do /me
<+MachineDog> you WISH
Comment: My first day on IRC
#11322
<RunninRaven> I don't think I have once asked Jeeves a damn thing
<moestavern19> I asked him once where i could find some kick-ass porn
<RunninRaven> What did he say?
<moestavern19> he said kickassporn.com
#7955
<weezyl> I figured I'd just fellate my students for the protein.
#1350
<Sharkey> Man, I'm getting flashbacks from Renegade. Apparently when I was a kid I was so bored I made up little songs to go with the damned music and now it's all coming back to me.
<Sharkey> Nothing remarkable, though. Mostly just little ditties about killing myself.
#79435
<Jebus> I stole your wallet though
<Jebus> :D
<pr0tekk> i dont have a wallet anymore
<pr0tekk> it got stolen.
<pr0tekk> wait.
<pr0tekk> ;0
#11053
<L33t_Hax0r[no_job]> hey, i (illegdibly) wrote a pretty damn good essay in class today, with no grammarical/spelling errors to be seen
<Mr_X> CHOKE ON YOUR LIES
<L33t_Hax0r[no_job]> Mr_X : when i type i fucking spell and wahtever all fucking bad cuz i dont give a fuck'
<Mr_X> ...
#13198
[01:05] <Hiyaz> I have my Windows 95 dick from my old Desk top
[01:05] <Elysian`> hmm
[01:05] <Elysian`> win95 dick
[01:05] <magtec> some may call me desperate, but i really don't think i'd want one of those.
[01:07] <MrSparkle> magtec: you never know what kinda virus you could get from a Win95 d....
[01:07] <Elysian`> a STD
[01:07] <Elysian`> Setup Transmitted Disease
#50475
<Rohoho> dude
<Rohoho> your not gonna believe this
<Rohoho> some bastard is picking my mangos
<Ranju> go fuck him up
<Rohoho> brb...
<Ranju> kk
<Rohoho> WTF
<Rohoho> he fucken hit me!
<Rohoho> with my own mango
#11860
<Fozzie> why is it so hard to find a good windows font?
<Fozzie> bah
<Fozzie> what a craptastic os.
<dithi> you get what you pay for
<Fozzie> you mean the copies you buy are better?
#40151
<Cataclysm> i am getting loaded tonight
<Cataclysm> i have no testes for another week
<Cataclysm> tests
#1586
<[D60]BIG_K> WHY IS CHANSERV IN EVERY FUCKING CHANNEL
#17266
<[H]AMD_Gamer1> yeah
<[H]AMD_Gamer1> but how does it decide what speaker to send the sound to?
<NickBlasta> magic
<0dan0> its a receiver
<0dan0> that uses "magic smoke" to turn digital signals
<0dan0> into 6 separate analog signals
<0dan0> then amplifies them
<[H]AMD_Gamer1> yeah i know about electronics so i know how this shit works, i just dont know what methods they use
<NickBlasta> if you overclock to much the magic smoke might come out
#3388
<Ponder> He found a better job, got a new gf.
<Ponder> All because he stopped smoking
<tragic> i need to start smoking, so then i can quit and all sorta good shit will happen to me
#33192
<sarah9991> what's up?
<mindstorms> the nation's average cholesterol count?
#18357
<+rm-Symp> im 500 lbs. @ 4'3"
<+TlMMAH> thats like a puddle of fat
<+TlMMAH> you must have grown around your IRC chair