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#131422
<lolage> Holy shit. Most epic idea ever.
<lolage> In the history of mankind.
<lolage> A rocket-coffin.
<lolage> You get put in standing upward. Door gets closed and you get launched into the sky
<lolage> with a parachute attached to your body
<lolage> the door blows in mid air
<lolage> parachute autodeploys
<lolage> you float, dead; down into someones garden
<oohal> lolage, you've got issues
<lolage> Oh man. I'd better get started on the blue prints.
#12079
<Meekitty> One day, I will become a Fairy Prince.
<Meekitty> This involves a sex change, killing thousands of dragonflies, and a multitude of staples.
#1424
<KuNgFo0> when it takes 15 seconds to d/l a server's motd..
<KuNgFo0> that's lag
#731
<reptile-> My friend and I took a bunch of fucked up CDs
<reptile-> and labeled them with various things
<reptile-> like
<reptile-> "PRE-TEEN SEX"
<reptile-> "GAY PORN"
<reptile-> "RAPED AND IMPREGNATED TEENS"
<reptile-> etc, etc.
<reptile-> and like stuck the "PRE-TEEN SEX" one in the window of the kindergarten.
<reptile-> and stuck one that said "CHILD SEX" under the bigtoy at primary school
<reptile-> I wish I could have seen the reactions from the people that found the CDs. :|
#3944
(seiki) &google inflatable+goat
(fnet) Google (inflatable+goat): http://www.vacationbibleschool.com/v_newfeatures.html
#303631
<nukespoon> me and my brother are watching the same stream on our own computers
<nukespoon> i am half a second faster 8)
<Sebas> Make sure he doesn't catch up
<Sebas> You don't want to cross the streams
#137951
shawnz> somebody's signature on xkcd forums is "warning: unpleasant spoiler." followed by a spoiler tag
shawnz> so i hit show
shawnz> Spoiler:
shawnz> You just lost the game.
#29290
<pupkick> baby's doing great
<pupkick> took him 39~ hours to have his first pee, but hot damn did he fill that fucking diaper, gown, and all
#54848
<GSGold> that reminds me of some robot from power rangers
<GSGold> back when i thoguht that show as cool when i was 5
<GSGold> in retrospect that's probably why i am who i am today
<Elyscape> yes
<Elyscape> yes, that's why
#7588
<human> beethoven and mozart should have had a kid
<human> then marry this kid to enya
<human> then have their children play with a roland xp-30
<human> then you'll get some nice tunes
#23912
<Alfador> 103. What is the fear of light known as ?
<DeeCee> liteophobia
<pentium166> sunophobia
<Shrubey> irc
#305949
<@Profane> my right hand aches
<@Profane> from using the touchpad for hours
<@Profane> >:(
<@Profane> stupid fiddly powerpoint
<@Riocaz> Yea "touchpad"...
<+goat> "powerpoint"
#9205
<[empathy]> i found out the other day that i was in the local newspaper
<[empathy]> under a title along the lines of 'new station security cameras paying off
#7813
* TPEGrunge is away: -(be back in 12 years)- since -(01:54)- pager -(off)-
* TPEGrunge is back: from -(be back in 12 years)- gone -(626wks 1day 6secs)-
#303832
<Kage> man remember when musicians got by on their own vocal talent rather than a digital voice filter
<ixisid> no i was born in the 80s
#22078
<ElDuderino> I heard having sex with women made you gay
<Shai-Gar> is that why youve never tried it mark?
#14729
<Sin> there must be a better way to get money then to actulyl get a job
#295406
<smurf> Hi - I'm sure someone has told you why you accidentally got k-lined earlier today, but in case you didn't know, a bot we run went crazy and k-lined all of #furry, thinking you were a giant botnet >_<
#13655
<MrCoulomb> ok, i'm taking out the 3 of spades, and reinsert it into a random point
<MrCoulomb> and i assure you, it is random
<MrCoulomb> I'm now shuffling the cards
<MrCoulomb> and it's a real shuffle too
<MrCoulomb> Now.. I cut the deck.
<MrCoulomb> and there is your card
<MrCoulomb> the 3 of spades
<MrCoulomb> found instantly within a randomly shuffled deck
<Mort-Hog> How did you do that?..
#32536
<CFC|Laptop> Bash.cx keeps changing colour... i think it wants to be micheal jackson
#29809
[22:54] *** GR8SATAN is now known as Soul|SEX
[22:55] *** Soul|SEX is now known as Soul|GOTLAID
[22:56] <Lizking> that was pretty quick...
Comment: sorry, I need the timestamps in there.
#21952
<Betharoni> My internet connection is so slow tonight, I think it's being sent to a train depot, translated into one's and zero's, manually typed and sent by a telegraph wire to the server, where it's manually recompiled to one's and zero's for the machine. By two-year-old's.
#54900
<XenoDemon> So it is 3am, and I am sleeping
<XenoDemon> Some girl comes into my dorm room (Door isin't locked, room mate is still on computer)
<XenoDemon> She mumbles something to my room mate who had no idea who she was
<XenoDemon> Sits on my bed, then lays down in my bed (I am still in it), takes my blanket, and starts to go to sleep, then knocks her head against mine.
<XenoDemon> I go "Who the hell are you? What's your name?" "Aisha" "Where do you live?" "Ogg" (Another dorm)
<XenoDemon> "you're in the wrong dorm" "what? no I'm not" "Well um I need to use this bed, go back to Ogg ok?" "Haha... Ok... bye" and then she leaves
<XenoDemon> I know it is easy to get random drunk girls into bed, but that was just ridiculus.
#57699
< plasmadis> Woman successfully smuggles gun into prison by hiding it in the one place only a woman can hide an object. Is found out after gun fires when she tries to sit down
< plasmadis> pwned
#107067
<Razmann> isn't that a sign of the apocalypse or something?
* FurryHelix looks out of the window... "Nope. I don't see the five horsemen"
<Razmann> aren't there only 4?
<FurryHelix> no there were five, but one left before they got famous.
<Razmann> so since the fifth left, that would mean there's only 4
<FurryHelix> reunion tour.