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#8741
<Doomaholic> my pad fell off, and i can play in an octave thats not supposted to exist
#4305
<D\TOX> ha, did you know entry-level pharmacists make $90k/yr?
<D\TOX> I'm in the wrong line of work...
<Xyrem> D\TOX : that's about the most boring job i've seen
<Xyrem> putting pills into a bottle
<D\TOX> and in your pocket
<D\TOX> and in your mouth
<D\TOX> and in people's drinks
#18884
·bdjuf· Customer: "How much do Windows cost?"
·bdjuf· Tech Support: "Windows costs about $100."
·bdjuf· "Oh, that's kind of expensive. Can I buy just one window?"
#14466
<Amante> Do you guys know how many 24hr porno shops they have going down 75?
<@Breathe> 138.
<@Breathe> And you don't want to know how I know that.
<Amante> I thought I recognized your picture :)
#1040
<Lou_Ferrigno> I gain $100.000, per month, and i have a z3 im my garage. And im bigger than you, you are subnutrition , hacker stupid
#103238
<Fathom> Zoe: Would you prefer a woman with a healthy amount of body, or some calista flockhartish hussy who eats a few lettuce leaves for lunch every day?
<Zoe> I prefer men, quite frankly
#6098
<#seattle/ThisGirl> SONOFABITCH
<#seattle/ThisGirl> i hate it when ppl ask me if im male or female
#24128
<Shadow> "Due to the recent decrease in overall test scores among high school
<Shadow> students, I propose we change the term 'foolproof' to 'stupidproof.'"
#299450
<Travis> dang IRC is still laggin like a *****
<FoH> and stars are mighty lagged, being light years away
#310640
<ChauffeR> what's the name of the mission that fucked up because they didn't use meters
<OyajiVyse> America?
#43594
<@Alucard> Uptime: 3 weeks 3 hours 52 minutes 34 seconds
<@Alucard> :)
<+Twiz> oh yeah?
<+Twiz> well
<+Twiz> my wang is 9" long so BEAT THAT
<!CompHobbyist> it's your job to beat that not ours
Comment: #wpi
#27213
<CheesyP18> surprised my 7" monitor has VGA
<@dabu> wait, u mean it's a separate monitor?? a CRT?
<@dabu> haha, and u wanna encode on that?
<CheesyP18> yea
<CheesyP18> my computer is up to scratch tho
<@Billy|B-A> my dicks bigger than your monitor =\
#301808
<Flack> hey guys whats the link to that website that goes through a little animation telling you to google things
#40901
* sanjay has joined #hack
<sanjay> im very much in love with a girl since past 6 yrs ..it was all going fine
<riddler> oh hell no
<riddler> don't make me DoS you, boy
<sanjay> but recently i have started feeling that she is now changing .. and trying to ignore me
<sanjay> i think she has someone else now in her life .. im still very much in love with her
<sanjay> can anyone hack her email id for me .. i just wana check her emails ..
<riddler> I'm SO banning everyone when i get ops back
#7718
<[-tOrn-]> And then today at work I almost cracked up
<[-tOrn-]> "Hey what are the system requirements on this?"
<[-tOrn-]> "Uh, sir..that's a book."
#61663
<pm-> i am going into the bathroom now to count my money
<pm-> you guys ever do that?
<rigel> if by "count my money" you mean "masturbate" then yes
Comment: #philosophy
#61919
<evalneb> what's the link to your site, david johnston?
<davidbloop> how'd u know my last name
<VerT`> davidbloop is davidbloop@1Cust216.tnt3.adl1.da.uu.net * David Johsnton
<Alizee> rofl david you spelt your name wrong
*** davidbloop has quit IRC (Quit: )
#306403
<+CoJaBo> me is bored
<+CoJaBo> Slash key: Miss it, and sound like caveman.
#17327
<Dragon-Beast> Not being a genius doesn't mean I would be a dumbass.
<Frozen-Solid> in your case it does
<Dragon-Beast> My case?
<Dragon-Beast> Why would it be my case?
<Frozen-Solid> because you are a dumbass
#3613
<SinbadTheSailor> hi hedge...are you on turps?
<Hedge> quite sober actually
<sTar69> sober like, just jammed my penis in the door kinda sober?
<Hedge> sober like i just got caught shoplifting a dildo kinda sober
<sTar69> oh THAT kind of sober ;)
<sTar69> i mean err what are you talking about?
#2744
<Longi> i'm going to go moisturize my testicles.
Longi is gone (02:23AM): vitamin wank
#46286
<hAz3L`02> so did it work out, remaking the company site with your internal web site builder
<wnuts> well...
<hAz3L`02> i guess like a standards geek you hated to use tables for the layout again
<wnuts> dude... it's fine. It's a nice experience, once I stopped having recurring thoughts in the lines of "well I'd rather type HTML code manually with my nose while being ass-raped with a spinning drill machine".. Now I'm on Prozac though and it's fine. Nested tables are nice.
#38911
 Duff: man it's cool how the walking trees fuckup the white wizards tower
Name|ess: if lotr never existed and Duff said that
Name|ess: I would want your acid
#297051
Andrew to Ryan: Go Home?
Ryan: Yes
Andrew: What does that mean?
Ryan: It's the place with the other computer.
Comment: Overheard two co-workers
#25603
<Darth-Phenom> I remember in third grade I was taught that it's sinful to erase the word "God". But now I backspace "god" when I want to type "good" so frequently I'm obviously going to Hell.