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#61856
<@ectweak> so
<@ectweak> I ordered a BLT
<@ectweak> and the girl behind the counter goes "do you want everything on it?"
<@ectweak> and I look at her and go "of course! I wouldn't have ordered a BLT if I didn't want bacon, lettuce, or tomato on it"
<@ectweak> and she goes "no, I mean like onions"
<@ectweak> and I stare at her for a few seconds
<@ectweak> and go "if I wanted onions, I'dve ordered a BLOT, not a BLT"
#58795
<Apollo> Ugh, I was looking at this one animal porn site, and the chick blowing the dog spit out what looked like melted ice cream. Dog cum doesnt look like that, it's clear, ffs.
<Trinexx> Two things wrong with that
<Trinexx> 1) Why the hell are you looking at animal porn?
<Trinexx> 2) How the FUCK do you know what dog cum looks like?
<Apollo> uh... would you believe curiosity?
#6396
<Legend> When I think about you, I /ping myself.
#62402
Spfamg24BIG: Can you get blind from looking at pictures of solar eclipses?
#43604
<Rob-iwiwc> imagine if the pope got up now
<Rob-iwiwc> think that might cause an increase in catholics?
<@HPZ> Rob-iwiwc: that's a damned good idea. They should've planned it that way.
<@HPZ> What a brilliant recruitment strategy.
<sprawl_gnome> worked for Jesus
Comment: #fark
#4203
<zeron> :))))))))))
<ckx> that looks like icewizard smiling
<ckx> all 50 chins
#23528
<Task-> i used to be able to say "i like stick my fingers in my arse" in swedish, then i realised it wouldnt help me in a conversation
#27046
<SteamedHams> this scab tastes like coffee
#9151
<Deke> i figure if I can eat in a country, I speak the language well enough
#16112
<@ataribaby> did you know birds actually have sex?
<@ataribaby> that disturbs me
<@shagman> you didn't think they did?
<@shagman> they just divided into new birds?
#4349
<Sharkey> I've been told I should be a phone sex operator.
<Sharkey> Which gender hasn't been specified.
<Xerox> I've been told I should be a phone sex caller.
<Sharkey> Keep reaching for that rainbow.
<Kashan> he's waiting for your call
#665
<reptile-> i like to masturbate
<reptile-> heh
<reptile-> I remember along time ago
<reptile-> when I was like 8 er smthn
<reptile-> my friend was like, "Gay people masturbate." or something
<reptile-> and I was like, "ew.. I'm never doing that!"
<reptile-> !#@$
#7503
<djfisty> i woke up with samuel l jackson's hairstyle from 'unbreakable'
#3460
<agrath> I banned him cause he pointed out i was a virgin
#3932
<Detrafilia> One time i was so tired, i had asked 'how are you?' in rpgamer, and then i looked in a diff query, went back to rpgamer, saw the 'how are you?' and i go 'oh fine, just a little sleepy. thanks. You?'
#13097
<Beedub> How the fuck do I get into IRC?
<Swigh> You dumb fuck
#60520
<@Rjx> talking about buying gas in the liter is for pussies
<@Rjx> in the US they measure gas in how many middle eastern countries will need invading
<@Rjx> HEY YEAH PUT A ONE QUARTER IRAQ IN THAT THERE TANK
#37688
<Naked> I like my Motorola phone because it has a rocketship function. On a full charge I can make it to the moon.
<Naked> Top that north. :P
<mrk> mines so small it makes good for foreplay
<mrk> phone ¬_¬
Comment: #futuremark
#18438
<rastie> Jit Did you know you and me have 5 balls combined
<jitspoe> rastie: you only have 2 balls?
#25206
(Makura) -_-
(@Shady) why the long emoticon?
#297667
<Khassaki> HI EVERYBODY!!!!!!!!!!
<Judge-Mental> try pressing the the Caps Lock key
<Khassaki> O THANKS!!! ITS SO MUCH EASIER TO WRITE NOW!!!!!!!
<Judge-Mental> fuck me
#118537
<Incandenza> tracklisting of this album sounds awesome
<Incandenza> 1. "It's Complicated Being a Wizard" 23:00
<Incandenza> 2. "Opal Magic" - 0:50
<Incandenza> 3. "Ruby Magic" - 4:04
<Incandenza> 4. "Sapphire Magic" - 2:19
<Incandenza> 5. "Amethyst Magic" - 2:18
<Incandenza> 6. "Emerald Magic" - 2:31
<Incandenza> 7. "Amber Magic" - 3:25
<Incandenza> 8. "Gold Magic" - 2:27
<Incandenza> 9. "Crystal Magic" - 1:27
<Incandenza> 10. "Black Magic" - 3:37
#12924
<Merrick> Elizabethian: To be or not to be, that is the question, whether tis nobler in the mind to suffer the slings and arrows of outrageous fortune, or to take up arms against a sea of troubles and by opposing end them. Ebonics: I be fixin to hang in the hood.
#18047
<BladeXT> hehe www.geekissues.org is a pretty cool site
<Videl17> wtf does Gee Kiss Ues mean?
<BladeXT> *sigh*
#11238
<Drew```> I really dont appriciate my sister saying "oh, close your eyes andrew, I already took off my pants outside"