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#10067
<Eye_Candy> you're lucky I retain video game knowledge like Oprah retains water
#111
<jestuh> i was trying to go the speed limit so i didn't get a ticket but a cop got me in a school zone
<DigDug> How much?
<jestuh> i'm talking about need for speed not real life
#70
* XS slaps the crap out of someone with a larger than ordinary, non-standard, frames compatible, Microsoft trout.
#18253
<[Piratez]> so what kinda job you got?
<drunkers> i wash dishes
<[Piratez]> at a resturaunt?
<drunkers> no, at home
#2498
<puppet> a woman can fake an orgasm, but it takes a man to fake an entire relationship
#8372
<Hito> Golden showers, fecal, fisting, bondage, S&M, cock-pumping, beastiality, dead people, babies, women, children, men, stuffed animals, trees, etc.
<Chubbzilla> ¤¦Hito¦¤ nice weekend planned
#25187
<unknown> once I was wanking while playing doomII and someone snuck up behind me and shot me in the back with his shotgun and I almost tore off my helmet.. Folks I am telling you it's not fucking worth it!!!
#67416
yeats: man
yeats: fuck it
yeats: if it's wrong, it's worng
yeats: lol worny
yeats: wtf
yeats: worny
yeats: ..
yeats: worng&
yeats: fuck this
#7227
<Prophet_Tenebrae> i am to porn what pot noodle is to snacks.
<Wesley> an insult?
#300299
<welandB> I love how on fukung there are image files of ascii art.
<welandB> We've come full circle.
#3891
(|Chris) it's the gift that keeps on giving
(Amanda`) Herpes?
#52451
<@Lo_Pan> i came first and third in the 2005 world masturbation championships
#25640
<pvah> when i got my cable modem.......i had to get rid of about 4 friends in order to manage my time
#14799
<TsN|EvilMonkey> hmm
<TsN|EvilMonkey> im having an orgasm
<TsN|EvilMonkey> wtf
#40669
<Mookeh> Pf, I'm taking head from a guy who duct taped himself to a ceiling trying to replace a light bulb
<jez> wtf
<Oranz> WTF
<Mookeh> OMG, worst typo ever! I meant HEAT!
#308371
<bob> At last, a public opinion poll that gets the opinions of ordinary Americans on the issues that matter! Apparently, two thirds of Americans polled think that Barack Obama is better suited to defend against an alien invasion than Mitt Romney, according to a survey from National Geographic Channel
<ramsey> those are really the things that matter
<ramsey> but I'm more interested in who is better suited to get us through the impending zombie apocalypse, since it's more impending than an alien invasion
<bob> i'd probably still choose the black one.
<ramsey> wow
#33888
<Hidden_7> MOTHERFUCKING COMPUTER
<Hidden_7> it is an expensive piece of hardware
<Hidden_7> I've poured my heart, my soul, my LIFE into this bitch
<Hidden_7> and it won't fucking give up the goods
<Hidden_7> so fucking like a chick it's not EVEN funny
#67318
<Anitox> IE doesnt support appendChild does it?
<StyleZed> my girlfriends womb does apparently.
<StyleZed> i've managed to append 2 so far.
<Biomech> ive managed to inheritChild myself :P
#244195
BigPapaSmurf695: what the hell is a nosegay
az721: it's like a bouquet
BigPapaSmurf695: oh
BigPapaSmurf695: i figured they just put nose and gay together to make a silly name
BigPapaSmurf695: its like saying earhomo
BigPapaSmurf695: or eyefag
az721: ok, i think we should really try to get earhomo into the lexicon
#36256
<esmerelda> exactly what is it 28 days later than anyway?
<Antifreez> I don't know. I always figured it was about the menstrual cycle.
#305934
(duckaroosky) so the whole time you were talking about minecraft for the couple of months i've been here
(duckaroosky) i always thought you were talking about that game on your computer where you guess where the mines are
(duckaroosky) and you have to clear it out
(duckaroosky) i just facepalmed when i realized it's not
Comment: VBIRC
#9100
* Ryo curses his swiss-cheese memory
* Grue curses his fondue memory. It's all melty and stuff. o_o;
#7994
< BigBadGangsta> I swear, I need to write a book called "Stupid shit for stupid fucks"
<@mewse> by a retard, for retards
#34135
xdev0luti0nx: I know a guy who plays with legos while listening to the mission impossible theme on repeat.
Serrated Sp00n: ........You know some fucked up people, Hannah.
xdev0luti0nx: They cling to me. It's really unfortunate.
#36634
<Razer> I just got dissed by hotmail..
<Razer> I tried to change my password to "penis"..
<Razer> ..And...it told me my password was too short.. :'(
<Mayseth> Oh it's ok. They have pills for that now.
<Razer> Which, coincidently, I get ads for via hotmail...