Random | Latest | Best | Full Site
#11943
<Normandy> I like Pixie's spelling late at night
<Pixie_Pete> kick Normandy SUHT PU 0F0!!!11
#53289
<Cinsu> I'd love to see a warning on something where the background is flashing black and white and the text is flashing blue and red and it says "WARNING: If you are prone to epileptic seizures..."
#310183
<zzo38> Is anyone in here who knows cricket rules and has experience?
<Slereah> What if I told you the baseball rules in a british accent?
#18869
<hoho> i wonder where skorn and iceman are
<hoho> i think they both got arrested by the FBI
<prophet> haaa
<NickBlasta> probably
<NickBlasta> jeep must have ratted cause of the 10gb of vids of jeeps mom skorn had
<isajeep> w...t...h?
<NickBlasta> oh hey jeep didnt see you there
<isajeep> *grumble*
#28402
onkeybutt87: I mean... television provided me with one concept of the world
onkeybutt87: that all girls were commitment-obsessed and all you had to do to be a good boyfriend was to love them, listen to them, and always want to be with them
onkeybutt87: but that mindset, it made me a pretty jealous, clingy, and possessive boyfriend
onkeybutt87: I should sue
onkeybutt87: goddamn television
#15903
<HeatDeath> You should take care of your nipples. They may not seem important
now, but when you die, that's where the angels grab you.
#310640
<ChauffeR> what's the name of the mission that fucked up because they didn't use meters
<OyajiVyse> America?
#14441
*** Meeko has joined #Animorphs
<Meeko> ennnik!
<Meeko> I've been pantsed while commando!
<Meeko> "What an interesting turn of events." "THEY'RE FLESH COLORED UNDERWEAR." "God, I wish."
<Meeko> So now I'm holed up inside for the rest of today, nurturing my wounded pride.
#8066
<ItaLiaNStaLLioN> hey i deleted internet explorer by accident and now i need a browser asap, could some1 send me it plz
#197
*** topic in #ramen is 'When your cablemodems combine, I am, Captain Pirate! :'
#35101
IQphat: you should see kill bill 2, it's great
eaglfan2021052: i was waitin for 2 to come out
eaglfan2021052: on DVD
eaglfan2021052: so i can watch em together
eaglfan2021052: and get it cheaper
eaglfan2021052: cuz im a jew
IQphat: I just downloaded it
IQphat: because I'm a jew with DSL
eaglfan2021052: word.
#28640
<StarExile> PLEASE OH GOD help me find a nick
<StarExile> like fucking hell -.
<StarExile> sry
<StarExile> heh
<JayBlalock> Tonight's random spaz attack has been brought to you by StarExile.
#306132
< mike|laptop> osama bin laden was killed before duke nukem forever came out
#74903
<caddis> the hardest thing about buying a macbook is telling your parents you are gay
Comment: server: irc.ruxcon.org.au, #ozphreak
#75078
<shen> I wanted to listen to my iPod, but, I left the headphones in the car
<shen> so I turned it on and put the headphone jack close to my ear to see if I could hear anything
<shen> it didn't work
#5259
<reuben> somebody keeps jiggling the doorknob on my front door, then running away
<reuben> i don't know if i should call the police, or hook up some electricity to the doorknob
<cristobal> why don't you put ice on the stairs
<cristobal> and heat up the door knob
<cristobal> and swing paint buckets down from your two story foyer
<cristobal> then a few years later, fade from the public eye.....
#40926
<Jism> Ark, remember that quote you submitted about me falling through the window naked?
<Jism> you fucker it got approved
<Ark> lol
<Ark> could of been worse, like the one where your girlfriend was going down on you as you release this dirty, smelly wet fart and she threw up all over your genitals then you kneed her in the face accidentally giving her a blood nose
<Jism> you're just lucky we're good friends and no bastard saw that
*** stealth7 (stealth@opers.sadhat.org) has joined #linux
<stealth7> lol qdb.us
*** stealth7 (stealth@opers.sadhat.org) has left #linux
Comment: I take it Jism and Ark forgot about the new Log module our channel service has
#36758
<ankleteeth> i cant believe people are still here...
<ankleteeth> what keeps you people amongst this crowd?
<FennecFoxen> eh? an old autojoin which I removed in February...
<FennecFoxen> then my system was reset to an image made in January.
<FennecFoxen> So.
<FennecFoxen> :)
#56188
<Nuttacon> i hate this, i have sooooooooooo much i could be doing..
<Nuttacon> it's overwhelming, i end up just worrying about how to do it all and not get anything done :(
<pentium176> i think you need a lesson in time management
<Nuttacon> perhaps
<Nuttacon> i don't know when i'd have time for it
#2504
<iRalph> i'm not a cunt
<iRalph> although...
<iRalph> you are what you eat
#63878
<tydel> this fat chick walked up to me at the club tonight
<tydel> she's like "I like vodka, buy me a drink"
<tydel> I was like "I like blowjobs, buy ME a drink"
<tydel> kind of a conversation ender
#52373
<an0n> If I was in a pool naked with Elisha Cuthbert and she was flirting with me, I wouldn't be shitting because I saw the principle of my highschool.....
<an0n> .....I'd need to see like...Jesus giving me the finger or some shit.
<an0n> God would have to carve "Thou shalt get out of the fucking pool" into the tiling.
<an0n> The offensive line of the Raiders would have to rope me from the edge of the pool and DRAG my ass out.
<an0n> Shit, she could whip her cock out and I'd still have to float around and think about it for a while.
<an0n> She could be like "I've got a set of false teeth grafted onto the inside of my vagina and it has a taste for cock" and I'd still be floating there going "I wonder if she does anal? WTF? Where did the Raiders come from?"
Comment: irc.sorcery.net #nodewar
#300818
<Crispy`> my friend is making my other friend's girlfriend rage on facebook by arguing with her about how Twilight is the dumbest shit ever
<Crispy`> so I created Twilight for Men.
<Crispy`> government scientist fused DNA with Hayden P. and Mila Kunis to create the hottest woman ever with big titties and a nice ass, and she's all over my dick but it turns out she's a pirate and I'm like "omg but I want to be a pirate" and she's all naked near me and shit and I'm like "you're the most perfect thing ever" ... See Moreand she's like "I know, now fuck me"
<Crispy`> and then all the sudden it turns out the government actually made someone else who was fused from the DNA of Kristen Bell and Elisha Cuthbert and she shows up and is like "what the fuck but I want your dick more." and I'm like "D:"
<Crispy`> and then the Kristen and Elisha fusion is like "OH AND IM A NINJA SHITYEAH" and I'm like "FUUUUUUUUUUUCK NINJAS VS PIRATE" and then this was my face when they were fighting a war near me " :O "
<Crispy`> with none of them wearing shirts oh and they all have super nice tits and are not fat at all and are the most perfect looking women ever and then they all want my dick so bad it's hard for me to choose and also whether I want to be a Ninja or Pirate it's a very tough decision.
#8896
<StoneTear> damn i'm hot
<StoneTear> i smell like barbequed eliteness
#11874
<GIJosh> do you still have an MP3 server robin?
<robin> yes
<GIJosh> same place as before?
<robin> nope
<GIJosh> where is it?
<robin> 127.0.0.1
<GIJosh> cant connect
<GIJosh> default port?