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#4134
<Scofco> just because i like hairless chicks with small tits, and that are younger than me, does not make me a pedophile
<Scofco> it makes me borderline pedophile
#297921
<bsparks> So, I guess I'm single.
<Tribal> I guess so
<bsparks> well, I'm gonna install Linux a few times
#28717
<B_Goodin> Self deprecation is always amusing
<B_Goodin> :-/
<B_Goodin> and so is farting
<Mark> especially when you light them
<B_Goodin> KABOOM!
<-- eric has quit (Ping timeout)
<Mark> You blew Eric off the channel!
#74366
mistah_j: most fat people are like IT'S MY METABOLISM
mistah_j: it's like no shit it's your metabolism
mistah_j: it can't burn 8000 calories a day you fat fucks
Comment: #rohmacking on espernet
#14222
<Sierro> I don't need music to get a shag
<mal> well no
<mal> music and miracle, but the musics a start
#7475
<w3nis> this bread smells weird
<w3nis> but tastes fine
<Guilty> Much like a penis
#28957
<Hatter> I'm gonna try routing the ds3 and 3 t-1 lines through a single cisco 3640
<Hatter> I hope it works ok
<yelworc> holy crap
<yelworc> who could possibly need that much porn?
<splice> hah
<splice> see, hatter jerks off multiple dicks in addition to his own
#60819
<pinky> hmm
<pinky> if i give the ants enough time they'd clean the kitchen themselves
#35763
<TMH-> Tip of the day: Do not packet sniff your family's internet traffic, you may find out more than you want to know about them. That is all.
#44810
Bronxalicious> Best thing ever just happened
Bronxalicious> I'm cleaning up my room cause Brent's coming over with his comp right
Bronxalicious> But it's fuckin hot
Bronxalicious> So I take off my pants
Bronxalicious> and I'm just there in boxers vacuuming up thinking no-ones gonna see me
Bronxalicious> next thing my dad walks in, and i'm standing there with the vacuum cleaner and only boxers on
Bronxalicious> and my dads just :|
Bronxalicious> so me not thinking about what hes thinking about im like "hey you want a turn, im bored of this."
{[ Hman> LMFAO
Bronxalicious> and he just keeps staring
Bronxalicious> then walks off without saying a word
Bronxalicious> and then i suddenly realise that the vacuum cleaner is suspiciously near my crotch
Bronxalicious> so my dad now thinks i have sex with the vacuum cleaner
#51174
Lucius: so im stuck hangin out with this emo kid
Lucius: he goes up to this hot girl and says "hey baby, what are you doing lateR?"
Lucius: she turns to him and goes "boy, i already have a pussy, i dont need another one" and walks away
Lucius: i couldnt stop laughing
Lucius: then he gets this sad look and tells me to shut up
Lucius: i calmly pull out my sharpie and draw a tear on his cheek
Lucius: he literally shrieks and runs away
#42200
<FuzLogic> I never did figure out how to open the damn doors on the landing boats.
<mirth> "how i survived normandy" by FuzLogic
#20
<Dr_DOS> My fish get scared of pizza boxes.
<Dr_DOS> They think they're giant borg ships or smth
<repp0r> Don't put an anchovie pizza near your fish.
#15457
<na-dragon> Who would win in a fight? A Z-Fighter from dragon ball z, or a jedi master?
<jonblake> Well, thats a good question, there are alot of things that need to be factored in
<jonblake> Z fighters can fly, shoot big balls of energy, go really fast, and releport etc
<na-dragon> Yes but a jedi master can see all of that happen before he does it, and he has a light saber..
<jonblake> I guess this is one of those things in life we will never really know
<Vyse> GOD DAMNIT, Has either one of you ever even SEEN what a pussy looks like?
#38339
Synlor: oh man i heard the most disgusting story ever
Synlor: okay this chick gave her boyfriend head right
Synlor: ya know
Synlor: but liek a week later there is an infection in her mouth
Synlor: so she went to the doctor to get it checked it out
butters: and?
Synlor: the doctor said it wasn't an std or anything, but it was eggs from maggots
butters: wow
Synlor: and he said the only way you could get that is if you had sex with dead people....
Synlor: her boyfriend works in a funeral home
Comment: irc.cheatlist.com #dcemu
#17249
<NickBlasta> i always dream and then wake up and i was like woah was that real
<NickBlasta> like the matrix
<isajeep> which pill did you take?
<NickBlasta> the hard pill
<isajeep> lol knew you'd say that
#52958
<Junithorn> Well, I've come to the realization that America really needs to convert to metric..
<Junithorn> I was down in NY visiting a friend and we decide to drive back up to Canada
<Junithorn> So ok, driving along the highway in the US, 60 MPH whatever, 80 MPH... and then we cross the border and he sees the sign, but doesnt see the KMH... 120.
<Junithorn> I didn't even think his car went that fast
<
#4265
<Deffy> Christ is so cool. He's born, I get presents. He dies, I get candy.
#13362
<Kitster17m> i don't quote meaningless blabs
<RainDown> <Kitster17m> " You are a stupid bitch ,
<RainDown> <Kitster17m> and i hate you "
<RainDown> thanks for being oh-so-meaningful
<Kitster17m> that's not meaningless, that's very deep
<Kitster17m> it's an introspective criticism concerning one's relations with another, and the social awareness of the prostitution institute
<RainDown> Screw you
#1741
<Zaratustra> Pagan pacman goes WICCA WICCA WICCA WICCA
<Zaratustra> HAW HAW HAW HAW HAW HAW
<MightyQuinn> hmmm. more ammo for ultra conservative christians to use against video gomes... "Pacman promotes satanism"
<Zaratustra> Pacman promotes consumption of undead.
#27963
<ogw> I don't remember jack shit about last night, but I got the IRC logs :-o
#8504
<dr_rotcod> my poo was white again. this cannot go on
#8962
* hals masturbiert zu: Mudvayne - dig
<shawnporn> is that german?
<hals> it is
<shawnporn> germans masturbate to some weird stuff
#28942
<@rzr_grl> wow.
<@rzr_grl> $1500 into the bank
<@rzr_grl> $1449.98 out of the bank
<@rzr_grl> in under 30 min
* rzr_grl sobs
<@jwz> hey, that's profit!
<@jwz> now you let the compound interest do its thing
#309377
<Zetetic> What's the extra four-digit code on my library card?
<Tonitrus> Missile access code
<Tonitrus> For emergencies
<Zetetic> Even our government isn't that stupid
* Zetetic hopes
<akkark> what does it read?
<Zetetic> Four digits
<Zetetic> I'd tell you, but I'm worried Tonitrus is right
<Zetetic> So I don't want to say it on a public channel