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#29055
<Mongvar> .de go develope the pictures for christs sake :P
<Bringa> ahah
<Bringa> gave them to the development store called 'my mum' today
<Bringa> they'll be done by Tuesday
<Bringa> remember, this is good ole germany
<Bringa> nothing works on weekends
<Bringa> and by nothing I mean Leon's mum!
<Bringa> :P
<Woc[food]> haha
<Errtu> dont invoke her voodoo wrath
<Woc[food]> I do hope her workmates don't read the Holy Bible
<Woc[food]> cause it says that if you work on the day of rest, you should be stoned to death :/
<Errtu> i'm stoned to death every day
Comment: #tavern / worldirc

#8667
<cryterion> that the girl had a nickname.
<cryterion> "mouse"
<cryterion> have you ever stepped on a mouse's tail?
<cryterion> and heard it squeak?
<cryterion> this girl did that at the point of orgasm.
<cryterion> "EEEEEEEEEEEE!

#115962
<%Raven> and then the next was "write a reply coming from a WASP"
<%Raven> I had no idea what a WASP was so I basically had to gamble whether they were for or against indian mistreatment
<%Raven> I went against, which was wrong
<%Raven> but I covered myself by saying "in case above answer doesn't suffice, here's a reply from a different WASP"
<%Raven> I just drew a giant wasp (the bug) and added a textballoon with BZZZZZZZT
<%Raven> he might just give points for originality
Comment: #dyo on irc.dyo-ecksdee.com

#25136
(jmd_) %lb chameleo
(jmd_) dead bot?
(@seymour) read the topic. we moved.
(jmd_) oh, goody
(jmd_) so long efnet, and thanks for all the splits

#7931
<SPACEBOY|GTA3> when the pain stops... thats when you know you've kicked the bucket
<nuggetman> i just read the obituaries to make sure i'm not there

#28813
<dharmakid> are you guyz sure that God hates fags?  My brothers gay,,,does God hate him?
<n0thing> yes
<n0thing> god hate him
<tfg> yes
<tfg> Everyone hates him
<n0thing> includling me and tfg
<tfg> but ofcourse
<dharmakid> poor poor unenlightened souls....God is the source Universal love...hi very nature is incapable of hate...I feel compassion for all of you...you will be doomed to repeat the process of birth,life and death until you learn this Truth...
* dharmakid has left #god.hates.fags
<n0thing> he must be gay
<n0thing> like his brother
<tfg> yeah

#2834
<semi> ThePikmin: oh yeah? well i can increase my penis size up to 3 full inches!
<ThePikmin> my penis size is already 3 full inches

#49051
<Shinohara> damned wireless connection
<Shinohara> fucking thing has more trouble staying up than Bob Dole
<Shinohara> I need wi-fiagra or something....

#30430
[PFY] One time at 5:50 I was sitting in my room with my girl and my comp goes "POP" and shuts off.
[risk] lol
[@beast] damn you remembered it to the minute
[PFY] I know the computer store near me closes at 6, so I just straight up and tell me girlfriend, we have to go
[@beast] haha
[risk] hahaha
[@robry] haha
[@robry] ownd
[risk] thats so quoted

#53935
helf: rofl
helf: apples closing stock price today was 80.86
helf: LOL
JonathanThompson: Now *that's* irony of the finest kind :)
Comment: today they announced the new x86 macs.

#7224
***  mrBlond changes topic to "Open party at Minko's, All welcome. Place for 500"
<Minko> grrrr
<Minko> You can all come, but I'm not gonna be there
*** mrBlond changes topic to "Open party at Minko's  <Minko> You can all come"
<Minko> Stop it guys, I'm busy this weekend
<Minko> I've got big things planned
*** mrBlond changes topic to "Open party at Minko's  <Minko> You can all come <Minko> I've got big things planned"
<Minko> Aaargh

#299429
< ChOwToo> elle, did you really understand the augmented Turing machine argument the other day in that other channel? Or were you just pretending?
<@elle> what?
* ChOwToo feels relieved
Comment: #VerbalAbuse @ Undernet

#49568
<DJ-Mike> ATTETNION
<DJ-Mike> DJ MIKE
<DJ-Mike> WILL BE ON
<TempestxJuggalo> a dick
<DJ-Mike> IN A MATTER OF MINUTES

#10486
<cj_> we lost 20,000 rows of customer data
<Twid> cj: eek!
<Twid> I hope the innocent were blamed.
<Kin-San> 20k? holy...
<cj_> we blamed the guy that didn't come in today.
<Kin-San> lol
<Twid> good.  as long as normal business procedures were followed

#297300
<Fax> TAKE OFF YOUR TOP STOP
<Fax> OH YEAH THAT IS SO HOT STOP
<Fax> You can see why telegraph sex never caught on
<NEO|Phyte> what do they do if they need to include the word stop in their message?
<Arang> DON'T STOP PLEASE STOP
<XiaoTie> STOP STOP
<Star-Sacred> HARDER STOP

#103238
<Fathom> Zoe: Would you prefer a woman with a healthy amount of body, or some calista flockhartish hussy who eats a few lettuce leaves for lunch every day?
<Zoe> I prefer men, quite frankly

#13033
<LilGCube740> are you from a dif country
<|STeReOtYpE|> portugal
<LilGCube740> u speak poor english
<LilGCube740> i speak poor spanish so its all good

#45629
RuKK0R: you know.. I was just looking at the official list of the most shoplifted items in the good ol US of A
RuKK0R: 1) painkillers
2) home pregnancy tests
3) razor blades
4) preperation H
5) baby food
6) condoms
RuKK0R: the first thing I had to wonder, upon looking over this list..
RuKK0R: if condoms had been higher on the list, would have baby food and pregnancy tests been lower?
jmlsteele: what I'm wondering is why is preperation H on the list.
jmlsteele: the rest "make sense"
jmlsteele: suicide, teen pregnancy, suicide, ????, teen pregnancy, to avoid teen pregnancy
jmlsteele: how in the hell does preperation H fit into that?!

#38027
VassiliSniper88: yeah
VassiliSniper88: I'm going to disneyland on saturday
VassiliSniper88: ^_^
VassiliSniper88: They kicked me out last time
VassiliSniper88: Apparently they have security cameras in the bathroom..

#14953
<TsB-Thuggish> i hate it when you can't explain what i mean

#119039
<Jon`> i only forwarded port 1024
<Jon`> are there more ports i need to forward?
<Astrum|Lap> all of them
<McShaggy|lap> Jon`
<McShaggy|lap> bend over, ill open your port for you
<Jon`> baby my port's already open for you
<McShaggy|lap> <3
<McShaggy|lap> i slide my meaty phallus between your hard steel man hams
<Astrum|Lap> ...
<Jon`> er,
<Jon`> yeah
<Jon`> that went just a bit far

#44718
<spongebill> it's a vicious circle... I have qdb open in my browser, can't stop reading random quotes, then I remember to turn back to IRC, see that somebody posted a link, it opens in a new tab, I look at it, close the tab and there I am, back at qdb

#50630
< cosmo_gunny> I was at the market buying food, and I was in the dairy department..
< cosmo_gunny> and there were various Land Of Lakes products.. with a big sign that said "LOL CHEESE"
< cosmo_gunny> and I lost it.

#307798
<vera> i always ask them if they are having an abortion first because it was awkward that one time i was like look heres your baby and heres his heart beating and she was like ok can you take it out of me
Comment: Vera is a doctor.

#22760
<fabutron> so we were at sonic the other day (which is a drive up restraunt like in the fifties, for those of you that don't have sonic) and we made a joke about punching the waitress in the uterus and over the little drive up radio the guy was like "we can still hear you"

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