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#303238
<gnolam> Blargh.
* gnolam is washing dishes.
<gnolam> Some of this stuff has been lying unwashed for so long that cleaning it is a truly /epic/ task.
<gnolam> So epic I think I should write a poem about it.
<gnolam> I shall call it... "The Grime of the Ancient Marinade".
#2219
<SD-Washu> i still love the msg i got on my voicemail earlier
<SD-Washu> that was l33t
<biafra> what
<SD-Washu> oh my voicemail msg is in japanese
<SD-Washu> and someone called and the only thing i heard was "what the fuc...."
<SD-Washu> followed by *click*
#296107
<RBOMB> OFF TO BED
<RBOMB> BAI
* RBOMB (rbombster@*) Quit (Quit: testical)
...10 minutes later...
* RBOMB (rbombster@*) has joined #fudgeh
<RBOMB> massive fail
<RBOMB> bed sheets in washing machine
<RBOMB> failed to make it to dryer
#53269
<TMH> and now I will try a new combination!
<TMH> pringles
<TMH> and garlic and herb dip
* TMH steps forwards into a new frontier!
<TMH> OH MY GOD IT TASTES AWFUL
<@Jude> A new frontier of disgust?
<TMH> it's like eating solid semen
<@Jude> ... Ew.
<TMH> ... not that I have ever eaten solid semen
<@Jude> I was going to ask
<TMH> hm, I'm actually developing a taste for it
<TMH> oh my god I am developing a taste for what I just described as solid semen
<TMH> I AM CONFUSED
#295504
<Tommy> Colds are the devil!
<gian> Pseudoephedrine it up!
<gian> It's like not having a cold at all.
<Android> ...you should write slogans Gian
<gian> And if you're hard-up, you can refine it into meth.
<Android> ..nevermind
#32217
<Josho> like math, giant wangs are a universal language
#39366
draco_malfoy_slytherin_prince: Hey, what do I write about this theme: "Creativity: Our World's Natural Resource?"
draco_malfoy_slytherin_prince: It's for a nationwide essay contest, and I just ran out of ideas.
Comment: It's obviously a finite resource. . .
#250456
<Periwinkle> oh man!
<Periwinkle> i just made the best thing
<@stoor> ...
<mikka> what?
<@stoor> hello?
<Periwinkle> oh shit, sorry about that
<Periwinkle> was watching a scary movie on tv and it made me jump so hard i hit myself in the face with my sandwich and got mayonnaise in my eye
<@stoor> hahaha
<mikka> so what did you make?
<Periwinkle> the sandwich
#15424
<ZondrZout> You sloppy ASP coders!
<Xtreee> ZondrZout, I am @ the stage where I am happy when my code works :)
<ZondrZout> My boss is at the stage where he's happy when I work
#56647
<tonyyarusso> I turned off my backlight by mimicking the line I found in the suspend script, I think it was 'sudo vbetool dpms off'. So then, to turn it back on, I tried to reverse it by hitting the up arrow, backspace three times, then on (effectively 'sudo vbetool dpms on'), then my password. Now the screen is cycling through colors and I can't do anything. Please help!
#4713
<DCBastard> hey i could get ven to install that saturn modchip that i got him to send me last year
<travolta> ven?
<travolta> who is ven?
<CraiZE> he means VeNoM
<DCBastard> see when you like someone you abreviate their name - that's why I always call you travolta
#49559
<Jakl> oh god that was not good
<Jakl> okay so my balls were itching right
<rat> I don't like the way this is sounding...
<Jakl> they wouldn't quit so i went into my wifes bathroom and got some anti-itch cream
<Jakl> i squeeze some out of the tube and apply it to my sack
<Jakl> it starts burning, and within seconds i feel like my balls are going to melt off
<Jakl> istarted screaming and my wife ran in and was like "what's wrong?!"
<Jakl> i explain my situation and she starts cracking up
<Jakl> as i'm standing there nearly in tears she grabs the tubee and points to the ingredients
<Jakl> the cream was mentholated
<rat> rofl
<Jakl> my nuts are still burning even after a shower
<Jakl> but the itching stopped
#51175
<timmo> 20% of americans believe the sun revolves around the earth, 17% of the people who know that the earth revolves around the sun, believe it does so every 24hours
<timmo> jesus
<timmo> people are fucking morons
<wind`> wait what
<wind`> doesn't the earth revolve around the sun in 24 hours?
<timmo> well i guess we found one of the 17%
#13732
<[-FeC-]sKratch> PENISES
<[-FeC-]sKratch> random penis, sorry
<Kwyjimbo> i understand
<Kwyjimbo> i once did that while giving a speech in class...
<Kwyjimbo> i never did do to good in that class after that
#29312
<zenaphex> Hmm. I don't think my mom has SATA. It's a Asus A7N8X.
<zenaphex> err :P
<zenaphex> mom=mobo
#10894
<Starscream> uh
<Starscream> i just accidentally told my credit card company i was smoking crack
<Starscream> shit.
#239514
<iMaal> wtf
<iMaal> i listened half the metallica album with no sound on :D
#127326
<Random> I've wanked 50 times this year.
<Random> My ring finger is sore...
<Kogita> it's the third of January. You need help.
#4016
<djglitch> i'm thinking about getting the front desk chix number just to see if i still have it in me
<djglitch> she is sexy
<tyne> lol
<tyne> u got her number
<tyne> "0"
#5595
<@goose> does any one know a way of checking if some one is online without using msn or any over chat software
<@goose> ?
<+KawaiiUsagi> not unless you know their assigned ip addy
<@goose> nope
<@goose> BT change it every time you log on
<@goose> can you ping the phone number ?
#14686
<pKx> My car was running without the battery installed.. man, the alternator was spilling amps all over my driveway
<pKx> how do you clean that shit up?
<`72`Monte> lol pkx :>
<spazzer> i usually use a dirty sock
<spazzer> oh
<spazzer> wrong topic
#16665
<@drew> my uterus is bleeding
<@cognac> drew, you don't have a uterus
<@drew> oh
#14083
<Entwife> I sometimes think we have one collective mind here that we just pass around occasionally
<Entwife> when we aren't using it as a coaster or something
#110372
<Beastage> notice how life and fail have same letters?
Comment: irc.neowin.net, #neowin
#59761
<anotherpadawan> you know, the Nintendo DS ad campaign "Touching is good" is going to give whole new meaning to "blaming video games"...