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#16475
<Logan> I have to say that sex ruined pornography for me. I discovered that women don't scream, "Fuck me you big-cocked cowboy!" when you touch their elbow.
#18333
Larry: I'm to go eat. People get hungry sometimes.
Juan: I hope you put clothes on b4 you went
<30 mins later>
Larry: fuck
Larry: that's why they were looking at me funny
#44914
<SeaQaeS> hey!
<SeaQaeS> you guys wanne hear something cool?
<SeaQaeS> I've got a telepatic connection with my PC...
<SeaQaeS> My computer is in my room
<SeaQaeS> when I go downstairs to lay on the coutch and watch some tele.. I often
<SeaQaeS> get the feeling I have to go upstairs again (after 15 in or 2 hours or something)
<SeaQaeS> And when I go look at my screen, someone is talking to me on MSN
<SeaQaeS> so my computer is telling me telepaticly that someone is talking to me
<SeaQaeS> nice of him isnt?
<SeaQaeS> its true
<SeaQaeS> hmm.. now its telling me that noone gives a shit
#9136
<Odin_Tiger> Even those maps that the psychics show of the earth flooded (the ones where science says there isn't enough water on earth for it to be possible) would have me a good 4 or 5 hour drive from any beaches.
#29760
<Kenichi> toothpaste fixed 5 of my music cds and my friend's gta3
<foofoo> it also prevents tooth decay.
Comment: irc.cheatlist.com #dcemu
#164029
<Stueh> Hehe we were joking around at work (she's a student there)
<Stueh> Her: Your hand is on my hip
<Stueh> Me: INCIDENTAL CONTACT
<Stueh> Her: You're standing awfully close
<Stueh> Me: It's a cramped working environment!
<Stueh> Her: You're staff, I'm a student
<Stueh> Me: ... I think you're hot.
<Stueh> Her: Me too.
<Stueh> *we both walk off in opposite directions*
<Stueh> So now, although we're cousins (but no one knows it) all her friends think we're dating =)
#104302
<Gerrit> Cannot join #real-life (Banned)
#35763
<TMH-> Tip of the day: Do not packet sniff your family's internet traffic, you may find out more than you want to know about them. That is all.
#45434
(Ryan0rZ) double wammy, Knox
(Ryan0rZ) your grandma died and you lost your internet
(Ryan0rZ) I'd hate to have that happen to me
(Knox) lol :(
(Ryan0rZ) I can't go very long without the internet
(Ryan0rZ) :'(
Comment: #tag irc.zirc.org
#5320
<Lucent-H> who wants pictures of high school cheerleaders that want to do me?
<moijkNrg> Lucent: I don't want to see any male cheerleaders
#16237
<MadHack-> i net 4200
<MadHack-> whereas i gross 6,666.66
<MadHack-> give or take
<MadHack-> quite the beastly salary
<MadHack-> 666 666 :(
<MadHack-> well, .67 i guess, technically
* MadHack- saves his soul through rounding
#30859
<Xizer> Winzip is such a girl...
<Xizer> "Uh hey. 30 days are up could you stop using me? No? Well I'll just ask again tomorrow..."
#1794
<Semi> What good is a car with no dildos?
#143464
<[DD]Earl> the age of consent in england was set around 1890..
<[DD]Myxlplk> That's way too high
#14409
* Mephisto is impressed of PrincessLeia2's knowledge of the Faustian religion
<PrincessLeia2> actually.... I just play Diablo 2
#14729
<Sin> there must be a better way to get money then to actulyl get a job
#308758
<p4plus2> VI VI VI THE EDITOR OF THE BEAST
#32464
<BlackDeth> dont tell me what i am
<BlackDeth> i know what i am
<ckx> alright popeye
#36219
<@Xial> Command line interface terminal. :o
<@Xial> Women are COMPUTERS!!!!
* @Xial has scary realization
<+Nulike> :O
<@Xial> Seriously!
<@Xial> Why do you think we have so much control over them when we use the Command line interface terminal properly?
<+Nulike> Enlighten us!
<@Xial> Because it's powerful. A well interfaced CLIT is a happy CLIT, and a happy CLIT means we are treated well, in return. XD
<+Nulike> O_O
<@Xial> Makes sense? :3
<@Xial> Plus,
<+Nulike> Worst of all, it does.
<@Xial> some women tell us what to do when we're using it, sorta like pressing the help key
<@Xial> "Ooooh, slooooooowwwww..." for example
<@Xial> If you get a "Stop Teasing, and FUCK ME NOW!", you've likely done it right XD
<+Nulike> @.@;
Comment: #voices / DarkMyst; Xial's apparently had too much sugar and caffeine.
#58677
<Crist> guyds i need u to help me
<Crist> my roomate glured my hannds to my mouse and desk'
<Crist> fuckrs ive been stuk herre for a hour
<Hoopaw> how the fuck are you typing?
<Crist> my nosea wttf explai ns my baad typuing
<Hoopaw> noted
#298198
<+pichu> 0C = freezing, 100C = boiling
<Hideki-kun> kelvin = C + 273.15
<%^> 0 degrees Celsius = 32 degrees Fahrenheit
<div> i look at all the ppl talking about temperature
<div> and all i see is K F C
<div> <_<
<div> and then i got hungry
#6905
<sbp> oh, I just remembered something
<Morbus> no, i already dropped your underwear in the mail.
#146969
<Trinexx> a GM was playing hide and seek with us, right?
<Trinexx> offering a massive prize to whoever found her first
<Trinexx> so I reported a bug
<Trinexx> she summoned me to her so I could explain
<Trinexx> I just grinned and said "Found ya."
<Armada> Did you win?
<Trinexx> No, she sapped me and kicked me off the server.
#2015
<Digested> cool :)
<Digested> you have a gf that knows how to download mp3s
<madog> ya
<madog> and email
<qvr> That's nothing.. I had this goldfish....
#13541
<MartinBr> LOOK AT MY IDLE!!!
<MartinBr> Uh.... d'oh!