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#311366
* vens is now known as venz
<aciou> this is the internet equivalent of turning your cap backwards
#27266
<mtek> mailin-01.mx.aol.com. 299 IN A 152.163.224.26
<mtek> mailin-01.mx.aol.com. 299 IN A 64.12.136.57
<bCc> wtf
<mtek> could try one of them O_o
<bCc> DONT HURT OURMEXICAN AOL SERVERS
<spear_> telnet 64.12.136.89 110
<spear_> not working
<mtek> mx doesnt mean mexican
<mtek> :/
<demetry> lmao
<bCc> oh.
<mtek> idiot
<mtek> lol
<demetry> mail exchange
* bCc goes back to my corner
#52170
QDB submitters, listen up:
1. Not using the comment field nearly always makes the quote funnier. For the person to understand the joke, the punchline should hit last. The comment field should ideally be moved to the top of the quote, but that's up to the people running the site.
2. Don't use the comment field for explaining context like they say on the submission page. When have you ever heard a funny joke in which someone tells it, pauses, and then says "oh yeah, and the three guys in the bar were lawyers," Explain these things before the funny part or the joke dies.
3. Leave off 'haha' or 'lol' at the end of quotes. Go look at some of the top quotes and add '<whoever> haha' to the end. See?
4. Fix misspellings and things. It's okay to want accuracy, but it's not that important here. There are a couple hilarious quotes where the punchline has an unrelated typo and it really throws the joke.
5. For one-liners and quips, the shorter it is the better. It's okay to edit for brevity and clarity.
6. The moderators are not facists. Your quote was rejected because it wasn't funny. It was funny to you, because you were there and you knew the people. Context is everything, and it's hard to detach yourself. Try changing the names in the quote to people you don't know and see if it still seems funny to you. If not, don't submit it.
7. Your quote will not be accepted just because you talk about the quote site. You are not the first person to think of self-reference.
#310235
<worstcase> once we look at women as 3d printers i think abortion wont be as much of a big deal
#33174
<HongXianShi> Is it a boy skeleton or a girl skeleton? :)
<Antimatter> how the hell can you tell?
<HongXianShi> Subtle differences in skull shape
<HongXianShi> And pelvic bones
<Kurt> you aren't a doctor, so you have no clue
<expohirma> hong: you're relying on the fact that it is a human
<expohirma> or that all humanoids follow roughly human anatomical structure
<HongXianShi> Most do, hence being called humanoids ;)
<expohirma> not necessarily bone structure
<expohirma> just shape.
<Kurt> halflings have an exoskeleton
<Kurt> that looks like skin
<Kurt> and a caramel centre
#85582
<Kogita> Google ads: PDF Password Cracker! Recover Acrobat PDF file to allow read, edit, copy, and print with PdfCracker.
<Kogita> right next to it: Secure your PDFs! Secure, encrypt and send PDF documents by e-mail with PdfCrypter.
<Kogita> Which one do you trust?
#281474
<Loser> what will happen when I tell my parents I'm bi>
<GaidinBDJ> You mother looks at your father and says "You owe me $100"
Comment: #fark
#31747
<sarah_mascara> and she hated her unique name. so she named me SARAH.
<sarah_mascara> YAY FOR THAT.
<vanbeast> hahahaha
<sarah_mascara> and being labeled 'Sarah R.' my whole live.
<sarah_mascara> life, also.
<vanbeast> :)
<sarah_mascara> my mom used to tell me i had the 'charlie brown syndrome' because i always introduced myself as 'sarah richter.' 'cause i always knew too many sarahs, you know.
<sarah_mascara> but...
<vanbeast> download faster, song
<vanbeast> I was always the only ben. that was weird for me.
<sarah_mascara> i must admit, it took on a whole new meaning when my mom got REALLY drunk about two years ago and told me i was conceived at the 'charlie brown hotel' on myrtle beach.
#53570
reverend: so, I was fired..
reverend: A few weeks ago, I was on qdb and read about this guy getting "assless fursuits" on a Google search.
reverend: .. so I was curious..
reverend: And a week later, my supervisor came up and told me my computer was being monitored at the time, and had a screen capture of a big picture which showed my browser window - "Google Results for 'Assless Fursuits' "
reverend: seems they have standards about this kind of thing.
#297086
< leth> gnufs: but that is already perfect, why would you need to change it?
< gnufs> leth: free software is not about perfection but satisfying your ego by modifying stuff for no reason
Comment: #gnewsense on Freenode
#302797
<Sabriel> I think I'll shower and game a bit
<Sabriel> before working on hw
<KamikaziNinja> thanks for showing up out of no where to tell us
<KamikaziNinja> :P
<Sabriel> haha
<KamikaziNinja> HEY GUYS I THINK IM GOING TO IDLE TODAY. PROBABLY NOT GONNA TALK MUCH. JUST LETTIN YOU KNOW
<Sabriel> haha
<mike> I AM A WOMAN IN A ROOM FULL OF MEN AND I'M GOING TO TALK ABOUT BEING NAKED WHILST WATER RUSHES OVER MY BODY
<Ignite> mike: half of the channel is gay
<mike> AND PLAY VIDEO GAMES
<Ignite> :D
<mike> Ignite, well, I guess you can speculate on what conditioner she uses.
<mike> :P
Comment: #80h on irc.80h.org
#421
<Andrigaar> there's a good rumor to start up again. "Jacking off till it blisters will form calluses and make if bigger in a few months."
#394
<blazemore> i hate when you're trying to own someone
<blazemore> and then you own yourself
#30770
(@Clitos) hungry for weiners?
(@tyree) fuck i could take a hot dog or two
(@Clitos) in the ass?
(@tyree) no
(@tyree) i like to swallow
#300455
<Alter-Ego> what you should do cougem is knock the girl out with all the drugs and stuff
<Alter-Ego> then put her balls in her mouth
<+Asestorian> ...
<%cougem> ...
<Alter-Ego> and get someone to take a photo
<+Asestorian> what
<%cougem> ...
<%cougem> Alter-Ego have u ever seen a naked girl
#308978
<Pryoidain> Huh. This build is acting very odd.
<asaph> is that the experiment ssp patch for llvm?
***Quits: Pryoidain (Ping Timeout)
---36 hours later, 4AM---
***Joins: Pryoidain
<Pryoidain> Just smashed a stack with a patch meant to prevent that from happening.
<Pryoidain> Well..not just. I guess it's...holy shit it's Saturday?
* Pryoidain throws that particular code snip in the bin and goes the fuck to bed.
#41221
<mog> I know this guy whose girlfriend has cheated on him at least 8 times that I know of... somehow they're still together, even though he knows
<krsONE> wow
<krsONE> thats a lack of self worth
<JinxedLynx> the sex must be good
<mog> um... no JinxedLynx
<trousersnake> 13 is as 13 does
<mog> as far as I know, they don't even have sex anymore... not that I'd want to, this girl is a fucking irresponsible slut
<mog> she's the one who has had "4 or 5 abortions"
<JinxedLynx> maybe she wants to set a record
<mog> maybe
<krsONE> she has the abortion punch card
<mog> THE SEVENTH ONE IS FREE!
#309763
< NDJ> Oh God how did I even do this,
< NDJ> My Windows partition is now ext4
< NDJ> Shit
Comment: #linux on a small network
#56372
<BinGOs> heh anyways this is for an assignment ?
<xaez> yeh, for an assignment
<BinGOs> we used to have printer bins for output at uni. I used to just wait until other people printed their assignments out and got to the printer bins before them.
<BinGOs> work smarter not harder.
#3985
<scummo> I was saying "eat a dick" even then, trying to get good grades by drawing pictures of shoes
<scummo> a tradition I keep up even today
<scummo> the 4.0 on the 15-page paper about the importance of midgets and dwarfs in film has to be my crown jewel
#309863
SavageWolf: Inside every man and woman is a horny teenager. Sometimes literally. In which case, uh, you are doing something illegal.
#6011
<incarnate> hey cres, I know what you're thinking right now
<incarnate> " "
<cres> i dont get it
#21579
* typeoghoul MY INTERNET KID GOT A 1200 ON HER SAT"S
<Predddan> internetkid?
<typeoghoul> yes
<Predddan> like a tamagotchi?
<typeoghoul> human
<Predddan> like a human tamagotchi u control over the internet?
<Predddan> kewl..
#72026
<LPF> sara, are you in a relationship?
<kitchen> lpf must be new.
<sarala> LPF, are you being serious?
<LPF> ...have I missed something here?
<sarala> Rjx is my husband
<kitchen> you're married now?
<Rjx> we're married now?
#26426
<Epi> God, whats that word where a chick is sorrounded by like 50 guys?
<Kharnifex> bukkake
<ArcaneMagik> Epi: engineering degree?
<Kharnifex> otherwise it's lekemba
<[L]o[L]> its the number one source of protein for women under 20 in japan
<bobbles> 1 chick for 50 guys
<bobbles> its a LAN