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#307000
< Cyber> When I'm on call I always feel the need to drink
< Cyber> A LOT
#307236
<Parsee> I don't know... Yuyuko, you were suggesting giving missiles as messages, right?
<Yuyuko> Yeah, you don't need an interpreter.
<Yuyuko> Everyone speaks missile.
Comment: #touhou, irc.darkmyst.org
#6695
<BlznAzn> i find it kinky to use my cock as a probe tool to remove lint between the toes of a foot thats been inside a work boot all day
<pagan> you must like to have Athlete's Cock
#25608
<Drugdown> I believe when you die its just like before you were born.
<Drugdown> ...nothingness.
<Fleebis> Like when you empty your recycle bin!
#41234
<BiG_10> gonna see if i can cancel my order of 6 gallons of listerine
<BiG_10> foudn out the damn stuff has an expiration date.... my 1 liter says it'll expire in may of '06... and i just bought 6 years worth of mouth wash
Comment: #teamlan on ETG
#7292
<bytraper> man get a set of mags for your car
<bytraper> dude.... steal a set if you have to
<bytraper> they really make the car
<bytraper> especially going a large 16" rim and low profile tyres
<Lord-Data> im too fat to do illegal stuff, i can't run away :)
#29104
<wfg> at one place I worked, someone had an "rm -fr" in a build script for their software development team...the makefile was set up wrong so that it would start in / and do the rm -fr...and it traversed /net, which was the automounter directory.
<wfg> Blew away 40 servers before the build guy thought to wonder why his make was taking six hours.
#42344
<KursK> can I ask a very dumb question? =)
<stickman> I think you just did :-)
#16204
<jamez5> {{ £åügHîñg Øüt £öüÐ }}
*** jamez5 was kicked by guard (-< Auto kick, three strikes and you'r out. >-)
*** jamez5 has joined #****
<lilskater3> wtf?
* jamez5 kick this damn excursion script non stop in the balls
<Jp2`> it kicks on characters like that
<doktersteve> oh
<jamez5> anyone know how i get that disabled?
<lilskater3> nope
<Jp2`> in the kiddie script options, uncheck gay.
#309784
<Noseless> AirmanPika: you happen to know anyone working for NSA?
<AirmanPika> personally? no
<Noseless> ok
<sluissa> noseless: my dad knows a retired NSA employee... oddly enough he's one of those people who won't stop talking.
<ender|> has to make up for the time spent silent during work? :)
<sluissa> that's what I figure
<sluissa> 40 years spent unable to talk about anything, he's going to make up for it in the last 10
<Noseless> why I'm asking: I have an AES (iirc) encrypted bitcoin-wallet... I was hoping they could open it using their backdoor :D
#5073
<langdon> win2k is tight.
<langdon> i added all my warez ftp sites to network neighborhood
#54312
<markos_64> GreyKnight: any idea on what to do with a router that screams on contact with holy water?
<markos_64> it seems to have real fun dropping, duping, or delaying my packets
<GreyKnight> Carefully open the cover
<GreyKnight> Poke inside with a screwdriver
<GreyKnight> Dodge any sparks and/or angry ancestors
<markos_64> Bob already suggested that i use a hammer
<GreyKnight> Then, replace the cover
<GreyKnight> and very very carefully
<GreyKnight> sell it on eBay to some poor sucker and buy a new one with the proceeds
<markos_64> shut the fuck up. i already bought it on internet auction.
<markos_64> i'm not going to ever do it again.
<GreyKnight> See? It worked for the previous owner.
#6434
<Cheetah> heh, someone else who was on my box didn't like my lack of bitchx ...
<sig11> heh?
<Cheetah> bitchx
<Cheetah> BitchX
<Cheetah> for fucks..
<Cheetah> (from .bash_history)
<Cheetah> who actually types things like for fucks.. into their shell?
#13603
<Sumez> how hard can it be to change two words in my legend?
<Fuujin> Extremely. You see, he can only do it during a sunspot minimum or maximum, and those only happen once every eight years. Also, it has to be a blue moon and a summer equinox at the same time. Plus, the year must be a prime number. The sum of the day of the week (Sunday = 1, Monday = 2, etc), the date, and the month must also be divisible by three.
#14627
*** Lachlann was kicked by Gromph (omg , are u illeterate?)
#50801
scythen32: man
scythen32: having ap stats at the end of the day is killer
so far gone fia: sounds like it might be
scythen32: it's like you've been wandering in a desert for ages
scythen32: the sun beats down harshly on your exposed skin
scythen32: you're exhausted, your throat parched parched
scythen32: you reach the top of a dune, and hark! civilization!
scythen32: water, shelter
scythen32: it's all there
scythen32: just a bit further...
scythen32: and then this guy comes out of nowhere and kicks you in the nuts
#297192
<aestetix> This is more of a good birthday present idea which lead to my mate getting dumped by his GF.
<aestetix> She couldn't afford buying him a bday present, so she gave him a bunch of slips for meals, massages, blowjobs etc.
<aestetix> She dumped him because for weeks he'd pull out a blowjob slip everytime they'd have an argument.
#35740
the_white2086: just thinking, 2 saddest thing I have seen for a while
the_white2086: 1) instructions on toothpicks
the_white2086: 2) warning many contain traces of nuts (on a bag of penuts)
phlipping: how do you fit instructions on a toothpick?
phlipping: they're pretty small
the_white2086: packet of toothpicks
phlipping: well, if you use small enough type, then "Put tooth here -->" would suffice
the_white2086: :))
the_white2086: seriously though
the_white2086: 1) moisten tip gently with tounge
the_white2086: 2) insert between teeth with flat edge next ot gum
the_white2086: 3) use with a gentle in/out rocking motion
phlipping: I don't know what's more sad. That there were instructions on a toothpick packet or that you remember them
#70213
<JamesF1> I was sat in a lecture today at Uni, and I saw drawn on the desk:
<JamesF1> "I graduate in 6 weeks, and I'm still immature enough to draw on desks"
<cmad> rofl!
Comment: The joys of Cardiff University...
#19835
<Rodent> Psi has the evil Cthulu-hello Kitty.
<Discokid> I love that Icon
<Psilynx> Hello Cthulhu
<Rodent> Red has the Wh40k hello kitty.
<Rodent> I have the U SuX hello kitty.
<Rodent> I see a trend.
<Rodent> And it's evil.
<Rodent> It's... Hello Kitty.
<Discokid> yay for evil!
* Rodent Bahahahhahaa's
<Technogeek> IN THE GRIM FUTURE OF HELLO KITTY THERE IS ONLY WAR
#85808
<DaveLegg> police van just stopped outside for a minute lol
* DaveLegg closed utorrent
Comment: irc.kick-ban.me.uk #kick-ban
#10213
<Blaxthos> any fat bitches with inner beauty wanna chat ?
#38705
* chupachipmunk touches his heart... area
* TallestSilver tries to touch her heart area, but smacks her boob instead
<TallestSilver> Ow....
<chupachipmunk> Hah
* chupachipmunk can touch his chest without hitting boob
<TallestSilver> FUCKIN' BOOBS! I'LL TEACH YOU TO GET IN MY WAY!!!!!!
* TallestSilver slices off her breasts with a rusty dagger and tosses them away
* chupachipmunk hand Silver some hydrogen peroxide
<Lucifer> yknow, that reminds me of something...
<Lucifer> you've all heard of the Amazons, right?
<chupachipmunk> They are the ancient all-female race who patented one click shopping
#1587
<HeLL> Is there a hacker called peer? He is trowing me off the chatserver(s) all the time.
#3563
<Slant> Maybe I'll be able to ignore my GOD DAMN NEED TO HUMP ANYTHING HUMAN AND FEMALE
<Slant> ANYTHING
<Zor-SLEEP> i feel for your sisters.