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#8277
(Moose_): what's your language of choice ?
(rich): english?
#301708
<DrCoconut> my toaster seems to have 2 settings
<DrCoconut> bread
<DrCoconut> and charcoal
#214191
<Gnome> Yo momma so fat, Atlas got confused, dropped the earth, and picked her up
#11739
<MissJC2k1> geez, we're porning a perfectly normal conversaporn, and you've gotta bring up porn
#304897
<+Henry> i'm fine with girls
<+Henry> they just don't like me tbh
<%primality> that's normal, Henry
<%primality> girls generally dislike most people
<%primality> you have to get past their firewall of hormones and rage
<%primality> iptables -P GIRLS DENY
<%primality> that's their config
<sudokun> lol
<%primality> you have to invoke iptables -A GIRLS -p relationships --sgender male -j ACCEPT
<sudokun> primality, that'd make girls whores
<sudokun> since there's no source identifier, they'd accept all males
<%primality> bah
<%primality> iptables -A GIRLS -p relationships --sgender male --sname Henry -j ACCEPT
<%primality> ^ fixed
<+Henry> this is why I should never ask for relationship advice in #linux
<+Henry> but on the other hand, I feel like I understand girls a little better now O_o
#7476
* rax humps Arwen`
<Arwen`> rax: down boy!
* rax humps lower
#154074
<newnicknamehere> how do I fix it?
<luvlg15> type
<DJPerks> type /nick Phail4Lyfe
<hopefulsemblance> type "/phailatlife"
<cheddarcheese> lol
* newnicknamehere is now known as Phail4lyfe
<hopefulsemblance> there ya go
* Phail4lyfe is now known as Phailatlife
<hopefulsemblance> perfect
<Phailatlife> it doesnt say Samual
<maddemp> niiiice
#6590
<continuum> is there anything sweeter than the first few downloads once you switch to adsl?
<continuum> first sex, first drugs, first drink... don't think any compare to watching 12Mb d/l in like a second or two
#38430
<junipre> PERSONAL NOTE, MENTHOLATED ITCH RELIEF CREAM IS NOT A GOOD IDEA FOR ITCHY BALLS.
<junipre> i am away: shower (Left at: 06:29PM)
#152644
<Crucial> whats a quick way to push ipconfig /release, ipconfig /renew to 50 or
so workstations
<Mo> cycle power to the building
#8150
<Vertinox> idiocy is relative
<Vertinox> in fact your an idiot next to some one else
<Vertinox> everyone has some one superior
<Vertinox> in some way
<Joe_> What about the guy who is the best?
<Joe_> Who is his superior?
<PyroRaven> That would be me
#37801
<kurt> hahaha
<kurt> i just looked outside and the guy with two 200+ pound irish wolfhounds is walking them without leashes, hes just carrying a big piece of chicken that they're following around
#4892
<lewZer> Man, translating 2 pages of non-spaced, non-punctuated, instructions for making lsd is awful rough on a 9th grade dropout
#155
<Eggo> invent a new kind of tolet paper, reusible or edible
#40196
<VooDooMoN> especially since i just got asked to be on staff at one of the largest lan parties in the US
<tooo> virgincon2005?
#311246
<MoikeLap> the E7450 was never designed with datacenter work in mind
<MoikeLap> apparently they can't withstand the rigors of being jammed under a 4U Sun server and used as a lever to line up rack-mount earholes
#305776
* Jorfs (Jorfs@9BEA575.2F81F144.8DE8CFAD.IP) has joined #britfa.gs
<Jorfs> Shit how do i chat up this hot redhead?
<music> okc?
<Jorfs> Nah im at a bar
<music> so let me get this straight
<music> you're at a bar
<music> and you're trying to chat a girl up
<music> but you don't know what to do, so you come on irc?
<Jorfs> Yes
<Jorfs> Why are they all laughing at me now?
<music> hahah
#5421
* Lots42 has just finished perusing Ladyj.net and is now very frightened
<LJ-atwork> Lots: frightened?
<Lots42> LJ yes. Since you have the eyes and nose of my ex-girlfriend.
<LJ-atwork> in a jar
#309109
<Pryoidain> ....
<Pryoidain> I just fucking got OWNED by a plastic bag
<Pryoidain> So I finished my twizzlers right and I had this 1 gallon plastic bag with a double seal thing
<Pryoidain> so i closed it up real tight and used a straw to inflate it to bursting, then sealed it
<Pryoidain> and i sat it on my desk chair and plopped down on it HARD to try and pop it
<Pryoidain> fucker shot out behind me, I flew forward face to desk, chair went backward, I fell off the desk and slammed my fucking head on the wall, and then the bag fell, still inflated, onto my lap
#4471
<the_Speed_Bump> I can't imagine a conversation that covers both philosophy and shit without being terribly disjointed.
<the_Speed_Bump> "So, what do you think of God?" "I just took the hugest shit ever!"
#310012
<Killswitch> I bet all the cool math nerds call each other algebros
#76119
<Eldritch> my friend
<Eldritch> calls tech support for his ISP
<Eldritch> 'cuase hes getting packet loss
<Eldritch> they tell him his hard drive is probably full
<Eldritch> and that he should delete some things
<Eldritch> so he says to the guy
<Eldritch> he has a 60 gig hard drive and only 30 is used
<Eldritch> the rep says
<Eldritch> "thats alot"
<Eldritch> and that half is about the point where things start to mess up
Comment: Adelphia internet
#33163
<goatasaur> that reminds me of the health spa that was giving a deal on "champagne facials"
<goatasaur> and i thought, "if that isn't the name of a porn site, it should be"
Comment: #fark on irvingnet
#28817
* +ramoth4 slaps politik with an unsigned long double
* +politik comes back with a _uint64 uppercut
* +ramoth4 pulls out a struct and returns fire
* +politik corrupts ramoth's heap
* +Fire_Elemental-Coding- ducks to avoid leaked memory
* +politik pops Fire_Elemental-Coding- square in the stack
* +ramoth4 stuffs politik's face in the bitbucket, and begins to operate on nil pointers
* +politik throws uncatchable exceptions around the room
* +ramoth4 dodges skillfully with his try-catch block
* +politik cuts off ramoth's private member
* +ramoth4 encapsulates the wound in a protected class
* +politik destroys all foes with up-casts to inappropriate derived classes!
* +politik is out of ideas
* +politik :: ~politik();
* +ramoth4 declares flipcode his namespace!
<+ramoth4> I win!
* +ramoth4 beat C++.
<+ramoth4> The last guy was hard.
Comment: -- #flipcode @ irc.enterthegame.com
#14714
<hellraiser> dude theres shit more important than grls
<eV-RaVaGeD> dude shes fuckin hot and she wants me :)
<eV-RaVaGeD> and theres more to life than Q1DM Tourneys
<hellraiser> yeah rights its prolly jus some 30yr old fat guy in his basement waitin to meet u somewhere to ass rape u in a public bathroom n video tape it, make copies and sell em on eBay for 9.99