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#39920
<anarchy_x> heheh
<anarchy_x> one of ash's little friends just called "x, ashley said the b word and the f word"
<anarchy_x> i'm like "which?"
<anarchy_x> she's like "you know, the b word and the f word"
<anarchy_x> i'm like "i dont get what you mean"
<anarchy_x> "she says, you know, bitch and fuck"
<anarchy_x> i said "now i'm calling your mom to tell on you."
<anarchy_x> and then hung up before she could say anything
#771
<c-rOCK> I CANT WAIT TO SEE THAT COLLEGE GIRL GET RAPED BY A ALIIGATOR
#50219
<Syric> Like...I'll give them a quiz and tell them to "Read every question before answering, you have 5 minutes" and it'll have 40 questions. The last question would be "Do not do any of the questions above. Turn in paper blank"
<Sammael> but that wouldn't be a question...
<Syric> k, now I feel stupid.
<Rooks> Acceptance is the first step to a cure, or so they say.
#27860
seph429: i need to write me some hacks for the game of life, i appear to suck at it
#215897
<kris> damn 1337, now everyone's numberplate is talking to me
#103426
Justin: Is there something wrong with only having women I can trust deeply enough to call on for advice with life's curveballs?
Scaramouche: Nope.
Scaramouche: Women are infinitely better than men at that sort of thing.
Justin: Probably.. but shouldn't I try to get a male perspective on things too?
Scaramouche: You HAVE a male perspective, remember?
Justin: Oh ya...
Scaramouche: LMAO
#9101
<Hiryuu> "War, the musical!"
<Ten> "With Sean Connery as Iraq!"
#9526
<MadMax> press the Alt key.
<MadMax> Once.
<MadMax> press the left arrow key
<MadMax> Once
<MadMax> press the down arrow key
<MadMax> then you should get a list...
<MadMax> ?
<MadMax> that works for me at least..
<Altariel> that takes me into the tools menu
<MadMax> which left are you going 8p
<Altariel> oh fuck
#135819
<jim_duggan> Why are the cheerleaders all pumped up after the game?
<jim_duggan> The game is over, why are they all still, "GO JAGS!"
<jim_duggan> They went, its over, they won
<PatHighgate> Jim, because the players are about to boink them
<PatHighgate> They're excited.
<jim_duggan> You spelled rape wrong
#56410
<PRoger> i recently purchased a broken dell laptop. the screen was broke. so i ordered a new one. i know how to fix that, but on my quest to hide the fact that i have a dell product (i despise dell), i decided to paint it, and maybe drill a hole for an acrylic window. nobody has them in laptops.
<PRoger> well, i took it all apart painted it...all that fun stuff. now its mostly back together and it works. but only off the battery, not wall power.
<PRoger> my desktop also decided to die as well. so i have 1.75hours of battery/computer time left.
<PRoger> aw man I just noticed my battery has dead cells. it just went from 56% to 0% dammit!!
*** Quit: PRoger (Ping Timeout: 54 Seconds)
<snorlax> ouch. I was actually going to stop idling and try to help him until I saw that his laptop battery was the only source of power.
#52991
<Maniaman> bah
<Maniaman> i forget how to spell maintenance
<Maniaman> wait nevermind
Comment: #gscript at irc.freenode.net
#14201
slightlypissed : I once got hit on by an old man when I was leaving a cicuit city :(
sourgirldaisey : hahahah
sourgirldaisey : did you get his number?
sourgirldaisey : :)
slightlypissed : no, I kinda just walked faster
#308117
Baljem: BBC News Headline "'GPS brain cells' seen in pigeons"
Baljem: look, dipshits, it may come as a surprise
Baljem: but there are perfectly good methods of navigation that existed for quite some time before GPS
Baljem: so could we /please/ stop referring to anything to do with being able to fucking navigate as 'satnav' and 'GPS'? before I have to come and smack you around a bit? kthx
RS_Asleep: Baljem: Now they could use an iPhone and have always up-to-date information and the pigeon could use them 53 brain cells for something else! ;)
Baljem: impossible
Baljem: nothing with 53 or more brain cells would buy an iPhone in the first place ;)
#109
<Jigsaw> a DVD and a CD are the same thing when they're blank aren't they?
<Jarvik8> cds are made of pikachu skins
#31066
* Parts: hello (hello@big-donkey-dicks-1ADB5D6F.frap.net) (this channel sucks)
* Kurt sets mode: +b *!*@*frap.net
<SteamedHams> Now listening to: The Beatles - Hello Goodbye
#25228
<Scofco> I neeeeed to gain weight
<Scofco> speaking of which, gonna go make dinner
* Scofco is away: making lasagna L:on, P:on
*** Scofco is now known as Scofco-away
*** Scofco-away is now known as Scofco
* Scofco is back from making lasagna. Awaytime 1min 14secs.
<Scofco> so much for that plan
<Jason> Wow, that was quick.
<Scofco> opened the freezer and saw some ice cream
<Idioteq> MASTER CHEF
#34034
<|6th|Hottlipz> actually ive done lots of bad shit
<ShminkyBoy> tsk tsk tsk
<[Dek]beetlejuice> lest her the worst
<[Dek]beetlejuice> k?
<|6th|Hottlipz> :)
<[Dek]beetlejuice> lets hear*
<|6th|Hottlipz> i ran away from home
<|6th|Hottlipz> :)
<[Dek]beetlejuice> boring
<[PIT]PhillyB_workn> lol
<Uranus> haha
<|fn|Grime> did you say orgy, hotlips?
<[Dek]beetlejuice> to become a prostitute?thats exciting story
#296709
<Nab> Primo
<Nab> I'm 6'1
<Nab> And 245
<Nab> How do you think I feel
<Nab> >_>
<cheese> you probably feel like eating some cake
#1583
<no_soul> did you know the testes on blue whales weigh like 400 pounds?
<no_soul> thats a hefty sack
<ecoli> my god.
<no_soul> just a little fun fact for you all
<ecoli> them is some big nuts
<ecoli> did you know that the blue whale's penis is 11 feet long?
<no_soul> i bet the shoot loads like a fuckin cruise missle
#40103
Recursive Badger> I have started playing Doom 3, but it's a little too effective...
Slacker> Heh
Recursive Badger> I generally have to cower in the corner for 5 mins before I can work up the nerve to run down a corridor
Recursive Badger> Though running along, screaming madly and firing at anything that moves is proving quite effective... There's a whole load of boxes and random pieces of architecture that won't mess with me again.
#3132
<sQuEeDeN> so much homework
<Joshua> shoot yourself in the shoulder and tell them you had to go FIGHT THE WAR ON TERRORISM! instead of doing useless homework
<shift> ass
#10162
<Gygaxis> hitler: NO FAIR!!! ENGLANDS WALLHACKING!!!!1
#71947
<Sceadwian> My ferrets are crunching on food behind my computer desk.
<Shadow_mil> ...
<Shadow_mil> Ummm ferrets
<Shadow_mil> my sister has one
<Sceadwian> At least I hope it's food. If it's a power cord I may suddenly disconnect and have a flameing ball of furr shooting across the room
* Sceadwian has quit (Connection timed out)
Comment: #freenode-social @irc.freenode.net
#50951
<Como> mom brought me apple pie
<Como> in bed
<Como> no wonder dad married her
#4012
<Gallant> what's the point of programmin C/C++ if your goal is to make readable code?