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#14513
<Stay99>but anyway, back to me. I want to be the ruler of the world. Sometimes-I play ruler of the world in my basement when noone else is home
#296542
<+Trinexx> my girlfriend logged into my WoW account and setup a fucking parental control lock
<+Trinexx> so now I can't play while she's at work
<+Trinexx> *rages*
#301005
Kage_Jittai: I had a dream last night... that my "uptime" command broke, and I couldn't fix it...
Kage_Jittai: actually... I could fix it... but it required rebooting :(
Kage_Jittai: I ended up crying
#307731
<Amadiro> RumpledElf, according to that definition, my markov-chain based chatbot spouting random phrases combined from previous messages it recollects from its database is probably more sentient than most actual human IRC users.
<Amadiro> aib, it usually ended up pretty much just spouting out sentences it heard previously to other people at a later point. Additionally I ran some simple regexpes over the output.
<Amadiro> That caused some hilarious conversations like the bot arguing with some guy whether it's "slipknot" or "slipgnot" (replaced all k's with g's)
<Amadiro> aib, we also fed it the bible, all 7 harry potter books, various pornographic novels and Karl Marx' "Das Kapital" later on, with brilliant results.
<aib> add a Hitler biography and you've got an Internet discussion generator
Comment: ##programming@irc.freenode.net
#7190
<eff> the noblest of dogs is the hot dog, it feeds the hand that bites it.
#302911
<+psypete> sometimes i want to poop
<+psypete> but then i try to go and i can't
<+psypete> and i feel like i've let myself down
<+ashi> It is natural to become attached to something you carry inside you for an extended period of time.
<+ashi> Feeling it grow ... and move.
<+ashi> Still, you have to let go when the time comes.
<+rowboat> thats some shitty advice
#51956
<coaster> i wrapped myself in a ton of bubblewrap once and jumped from the 4th floor
<irishlace> no you didn't... LOL
<coaster> yes i did
<irishlace> wtf were you on?
<coaster> well, i was on the 4th floor
<coaster> then the first
Comment: irc.lessthanthree.us #<3
#25569
<aichpvee> kiger: what was best back in the day in uo was roleplaying a prostitute
<Kiger> lol
<Kiger> you did that aich?
<aichpvee> yeah, i ran the "Streakers' Guild of Britannia"
<aichpvee> ran around nekkid and used bow command to give head for money
#71165
<Yahovah> bsmntbombdood: I have a new nickname for you. Captain Oblivious.
<bsmntbombdood> I don't get it
<Yahovah> Exactly.
#298043
SwineFlu has joined #askreddit
SwineFlu infects mexicans
<jerrygofixit> lol
SwineFlu infects americans
<jerrygofixit> fuck
#8776
<Yurmaster> I may not be Fred Flintstone, but I can make your bed rock.
#11281
<Ouroboros> I think the downfall of the Roman Empire was caused by something similar to IRC.
<Ouroboros> The Roman equivilent of a lawless, perverted group of weirdos, if you will.
#308371
<bob> At last, a public opinion poll that gets the opinions of ordinary Americans on the issues that matter! Apparently, two thirds of Americans polled think that Barack Obama is better suited to defend against an alien invasion than Mitt Romney, according to a survey from National Geographic Channel
<ramsey> those are really the things that matter
<ramsey> but I'm more interested in who is better suited to get us through the impending zombie apocalypse, since it's more impending than an alien invasion
<bob> i'd probably still choose the black one.
<ramsey> wow
#300455
<Alter-Ego> what you should do cougem is knock the girl out with all the drugs and stuff
<Alter-Ego> then put her balls in her mouth
<+Asestorian> ...
<%cougem> ...
<Alter-Ego> and get someone to take a photo
<+Asestorian> what
<%cougem> ...
<%cougem> Alter-Ego have u ever seen a naked girl
#309709
<wushin> Yeah, but I'm a sysadmin so to me, hacks, spam and other exploits are like pokemon and I got to catch them all.
#302477
< Glayde|w> i remember telling a friend 'you have to register your nickname'
< Glayde|w> the next day he tells me how he registered mirc
#59503
-[A]lucard- [Global Notice] Dear whoever is talking to Nickserv about "death cheese of heaven" and "ok go now" .. your messages aren't going to their intended target.
Comment: irc.surrealchat.net
#32047
* gjinn[a] points to his atheist side
* EmersonOw points to his love for underaged boys
<EmersonOw> i mean my catholic side
#3249
BogoMips: trying to figure out why my scanner isn't installed
BogoMips: AHH.. NOT PLUGGED IN TO THE COMPUTER HAHAH
BogoMips: i wonder how i even manage to feed myself sometimes
#15636
<KB8> im sick of you crazypale
<crazypale> im sick of you to
<KB8> no im sick of you crazypale
<crazypale> no ,im sick of you to
<KB8> you gte on my damn nerves
<crazypale> you make my stomache turn asswipe
<KB8> i gotta go ill pm you later
<crazypale> ok l8r
#3348
<sector_> it was a boring uneventful game IMHO and my fucking HO is top-notch
#34160
<Blah_x> it says i am the computer administor
<trippah> i feel sorry for your pc
Comment: #php efnet
#62028
<sonic> nah, for the enterprise and server systems I think, they want to compete with Linux' ZEN
<dtm> oh holy crap.. did i just see a person pretend that a word is a plural and make a plural possessive based on the idea that the end of the sound of the ending consonant SOUNDS like an "s"?
<dtm> this is some kind of recursively regressive anti-grammar
<dtm> what's next? "I'" instead of "my"?
Comment: #zsnes on freenode
#23634
(Mobius`) is there a disease where your hands always feel dirty and you wash them like every 20mins?
(dtw) excessive fisting
#4780
<Thumb> do you know of any major organizations that are similar the CDC?
<Lucent> who?
<Thumb> center for disease control
<Lucent> i said WHO
<Thumb> what? i'm asking you
<Lucent> World Health Organization