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#34999
<Zuwadza> Ha
<Zuwadza> Apparently a young girl in Jackie Chan's fan club killed herself when she found out he was married
<Zutroy> not a big fan if she didn't know that
<Zutroy> poseur
Comment: Err, no comment.
#6400
<cygnus> speech recognition is only for people who don't jerk off enough to build up wrist strength and then get fucked up from using their keyboards
#214675
<Excremento> how goes the login screens going man?
<n00bMeiSter> oh, you didn't hear, did you?
<n00bMeiSter> my laptop died on tuesday night while i was out
<n00bMeiSter> it was a peaceful death, it went silently in its' powersave mode
#49735
<GenericLoser> What do fish smoke?
<GenericLoser> Seaweed!
#10805
dsp/#nz2600 boggles at chick logic , "i know you're upset with me, and that
upsets me, which is why i'm bitchy at you"
-dsp, nz2600
#28857
<VeryCoolCat> oh god, im gonna watch out what videos i download on the net
<strangled-cake> why?
<strangled-cake> MPAA subpoena?
<VeryCoolCat> no
<VeryCoolCat> i got a bad porno
#45219
<Grug> Grug Fact: I was born on my mums Birthday!!!
<Grug> Serious
<Grug> 3rd of July
<Grug> She said I was worst bday present ever
#311314
<Jigsy> So is it possible to restore the United States from a backup?
#8210
<vino> when we first got our chickens
<vino> we got all these differant ones
<vino> and some of them fighted
<vino> and no jokes
<vino> one of them
<vino> bashed the fuck out of another one
<vino> and did a victory dance
<nim-zero> serious man
<nim-zero> go to narcotics anonymous
#30519
<MS|D3m0n>: I had a really cool dream the other night and when I woke up I tried to click View Source so that I could put it on my site
#1275
<iis> exploit me
#12004
<maff> AMERICA'S ARMY
<maff> defend freedom. online. with some 13 year olds.
#37558
<@David> Yay I get laid today! Been a month.... needing it by now
<@Sony> ...........
<@Sony> TMI TMI TMI
<@David> Only a few hundred pounds but its better than nothing
<Malpine> Thanks for the info
<@David> eh?
<@David> damn i meant PAID
<@David> I get PAID today
<@David> dammit
Comment: ZiRC
#185341
<@utonium> * QUESTION * SECRET of 793722, worth 100 points: acronym soup: dap?
<+PaulATL> d
<+trueeevil> no d?
<+trueeevil> lol?
<+SuzyCat> wha?
<+Zyloch> lol
<the_bandi> parents against dyslexia
<@utonium> Yes! the_bandi! got the answer QUESTION(240576) -> parents against dyslexia <- in 34 seconds and recieves --> 70 <-- points!
Comment: #trivia on EFNet
#5660
<Sys> I hate maths. What do you reckon they'll do if I fail it?
<0ut_Lore> you repeat it. fail it AGAIN, and you face the exclusion board. guess what they do? ;P
<Sys> Exclude you from having to do it a third time? :D
#1828
[22:29] <Brentai> ...Foxie, these brownies you were eating smell kind of funny.
[22:29] <FoxieMoxie> I was eating brownies?
[22:29] <Brentai> Exactly.
#11485
<jre> I know how to end racism. It involves a lot of fucking.
<egg> 1st ANNUAL ORGY TO END RACIAL DISCRIMINATION
<Idiotsavant> Usher in the vaunted age of syphilis
#1152
<th0m> i hate clicking on ad banners
<th0m> because i hear a little like clink of a coin going into an
asshole's bank account
#60378
<OpZChAoS> hands up anyone who has ever stuffed up a linux installation
* SKoRM puts hands up
<Peppery> never :)
<SKoRM> put a finger up for every time your windows has crashed?
* SKoRM puts up 17
<Peppery> cant...
<Peppery> fingers dont go that high
#14581
<@crystalis> I wish I had a vagina
<@crystalis> I'd keep stuff in it
<@crystalis> like car keys and stuff
#41048
Eurous Ventulus: You're more full of yourself than a masochistic cannibal.
#51602
The Magma Hawk: I can see the Presidential race 20 years from now.
The Magma Hawk: "Have you ever tried an MMORPG?"
The Magma Hawk: "I tried WoW once, but I never leveled."
#29930
<PigsCantFly> whats the most you've wanked in one day?
<SteamedHams> 5 guys
#71255
<WarHawk> guys can someone give me some tips for girls?
<WarHawk> im just so shy that i just start talking in here rather than to them after school
* Siege sets mode: +b *!*@ZiRC-80795AC0.sttlwa.dsl-w.verizon.net
* WarHawk was kicked by Siege (problem solved. thank me later.)
Comment: irc.zirc.org #flames
#305330
<Hadley> PONY WANNA SEE MY DICK
<Pony> no, hadley. I am strictly in the vagina business
<Hadley> Pony: you should consider expanding your market! i have some brochures about the penis market, if you'd like
<Pony> why have more penis if you already have one yourself
<Pony> it's like buying a second iphone. it's pointless and not usefull
<Hadley> Pony: like the iphone, a penis lacks multitasking, which is where investing in multiples comes in handy
<Pony> then it's still overkill, hadley. the second one should be an ipad or ipod in that case
<Hadley> Pony: so... if i get the analogy correctly... you're only interested in a penis if it's twice as big as your current one?
<Pony> yes
<Hadley> THEN HAVE I GOT GREAT NEWS FOR YOU