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#46621
<rhppnrth> Skype is not a telephony replacement service and cannot be used for emergency dialing.
<rhppnrth> OH SHIT GUYS MY HOUSE IS ON FIRE
<rhppnrth> LEMME LAUNCH SKYPE
<rhppnrth> OH FUCK I'M NOT LOGGED IN
<rhppnrth> JESUS IT'S GETTING HOT IN HERE
#34158
<Clutch> Anyone else notice that 'strap on' spelt backwards is 'no parts'?
Comment: #gaming - gaming.windfyre.net - Feel thy spiff fool
#303622
Mike: "now that you all are awake. are there anyone who can help with my problem? I have compressed my important files with md5sum. how do I decompress them ?"
#7275
[Leviath] I have a funny tingle in my nose. At 3:30pm I ate some Kettle Chilli chips and went into this coughing/snorting fit and coughed a small piece of chilli chip up my nose and snorted it out. It burned like HELL and I in turn created a scene being the 27 year old crying gayboy with a bag of chips in one hand and some printer paper I used to blow my nose on in the other :(((
#29328
<egon> check out, and turn in old keys, and that's the end of the old apartment..
<DJ-Pyro> burn it to the ground
<egon> I think it's worse to leave it back to the landlords
#28686
<Bank6000> What is the best way to approach a person who you are attracted to at a book store, library, animal shelter or football game shown on TV at a bar?
<CrustyNutz> You can do it put your ass into it!
<TheBrat> uummm personally just don't say some cheesy pick up line..
<xTrinityLuvx> yeah just be yourself
<speedracer> Kick her in the shin.
<speedracer> She'll remember you next time.
<Evil_Couch> zap her with a fucking tazer and then drag her back to your place
<Evil_Couch> by the time she wakes up, she'll be chained to your bed and she'll HAVE to love you or you'll cut her food ration in half.
#1980
<Thom> ..spam has got funnier since I last checked. It used to be 'GET A 9" DICK IN DAYS!'. Now I'm getting 'GET HUGE JUICY TITS IN WEEKS!'
<SenorSedo> I'd rather get huge juicy tits than some black guy showin up at my door
#23818
<bLanKer> omg my right hand hurts alot
<bLanKer> what is it called?
<bLanKer> when ur hands hurt b/c of repetative motion?
<|404notfound> masturbation
#301922
<kelvin> I wrote an app in C# for the first time today
<kelvin> it was only about 6 lines, took about 5 minutes
<kelvin> then I felt dirty and spent the next 3 hours writing the same code in C
<kelvin> :(
#43377
(@Someone): <\³
(@Someone): erm
(@Someone): <\3
(@core`cappiez): How the fuck do you get a superscript 3, and a regular 3 fucked up.
(@core`cappiez): The superscript isn't even on the fucking keyboard.
(@Someone): lol
(@Someone): it is on mine
(@core`cappiez): Fuck you, no it's not.
(@Someone): i guess you dont have a german keyboard as i have
(@Someone): 3³ its both on the same key
(@core`cappiez): Who the fuck buys a German keyboard, are you retarded or something?
(@Someone): well you cant buy any other keyboards here in germany.
#1112
<BlackDeth> gb: ph33r im gonna be seeing spacegirl in a few weeks :P
<LkTrout1> Deth is a boner.
<blazemore> lk has a blackdeth.
#49737
<Yrederemnul> heh, I just noticed
<Yrederemnul> M T W T F S S
<Yrederemnul> there's a 'what the fuck' in the middle of the week
#2952
<nstylz> i want to make a site that the people run it and then just forget about it and watch the $ go in
<Deadbolt> sorry, we already have a slashdot
#42137
<Bisclaveret> Q: How many Bush Administration officials does it take to screw in a light bulb?
<Bisclaveret> A: None. There is nothing wrong with the light bulb; its conditions are improving every day. Any reports of its lack of incandescence are delusional spin from the liberal media. That light bulb has served honorably, and anything you say undermines the lighting effort. Why do you hate America?
#310218
<+kmc> my girlfriend served as an adult control subject for some behavioral research on children
<+kmc> she did live on psych studies for a year yeah
<Jafet> Is there a control protocol where you don't use people who live off being sociology test subjects
#4419
<EnochRoot> #include pestilence.h
#311085
<kerio> i'm looking for a client that can use ecdsa account keys
<kerio> can be very barebones, in fact i'd prefer it
<kerio> initially i wanted to use gethttpsforfree but it doesn't support ecdsa account keys :|
<hl> kerio: My client supports ECDSA keys
<kerio> does your client do CSRs
<kerio> i'm all for the CSRs
<hl> no. Why do you need CSRs?
<kerio> because i measure my self-worth by how many openssl subcommands i can use in a row without having to check the documentation
#60470
<Ina> got a problem with that file stuff
<Alex> what?
<Ina> yeah, always tells me that the files are too large
<Alex> well, send them separately or compress them
<Ina> but I've already pushed them closer to each other
<Alex> pushed them closer??
<Ina> yeah, on the screen, you know
<Alex> ???
<Ina> those symbols, you know, I've put them closer to each other, now they take up less room
<Alex> you've... pushed together... the images... the symbols...?
<Ina> YEAH! Now they need less space, don't they?
<Alex> ...*bangs head on table*
#2574
<blazemore> i don't even know who the beatles are
<blazemore> except for jay leno and that other guy that just died
#6664
<qik> ur at school?
<De-Gen> yer
<qik> LOOK TEACHER IT SAYS CUNT ON THE SCREEN!
*** De-Gen has quit IRC
#52606
< specsmu> ohhhh that reminds me
< specsmu> after I went to petsmart I went to panda express
< specsmu> I ordered my food, went through the line
< specsmu> keep in mind I'm 6', full beard
< specsmu> the lady looks at me, and says "can I help you, maam?"
< specsmu> so I said in a really loud voice, "wow, they call me maam on the phone all the time, but never in person"
< specsmu> she apologized... so after I called her "sir" once, I dropped it.
#11504
<Kurt> Who would win in a fight, Batman or Jesus?
<jre> Batman
<egg> Batman
<jre> Does Jesus have a Christ-mobile or a utility belt? NO.
#38914
<Hidatoshi> the pizza person FORGOT MY FUCKING PIZZA
<Hidatoshi> he gave me one pizza
<Hidatoshi> and I was like
<Hidatoshi> "Uh where's the other one?"
<Hidatoshi> He looked at the recent and said "Oh shit."
<Hidatoshi> "I'll be right back."
#23404
<D>: ill murder you good >:o
<k33bz> not if u can't get to me!
<k33bz> jerkzilla!
<D>: when i go visit you >:o
<k33bz> like hell u will
<D>: fine i wont go visit you then
<k33bz> yes u will
<k33bz> but the joy of here will keep u docile
<k33bz> then halfway home when u go over the border u'll be like, "FUCK >< forgot to murder k33bz"
<k33bz> hah!
<k33bz> and that's the story of how christmas was saved
#9103
<vmob_babe> french is a beautiful language.
<agent_rot> i dont like it
<vmob_babe> why is that?
<agent_rot> cuz i dont like words like 'bourdoeux' or whatever are "bordo"
<vmob_babe> hmm.
<agent_rot> theyre just trying to cheat at scrabble i tell you!