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#307229
<Haschel> Hmm. Wolfram Alpha can't calculate the dietary fiber in half the mass of the moon in Triscuits.
#295040
(@craig): i was trying to reproduce an error
(~Terry): be sure not to use a condom then
#40726
-!- dogmeat [dogmeat@pcp01841549pcs.owngsm01.md.comcast.net] has joined #wtf
< dogmeat> fags!
-!- dogmeat [dogmeat@pcp01841549pcs.owngsm01.md.comcast.net] has left #wtf []
-!- dogmeat [dogmeat@pcp01841549pcs.owngsm01.md.comcast.net] has joined #wtf
< dogmeat> except darkwise!
-!- dogmeat [dogmeat@pcp01841549pcs.owngsm01.md.comcast.net] has left #wtf []
#93
<Mootar> what was god thinking when he made my ass sweat?
#7630
<XxChesterxX> who here uses a dildough
<Solidus> only when i'm making some dilbread
#17244
<Muppet> *arf arf*
<damnyoure> *slap slap*
<Muppet> *bite bite*
<damnyoure> *bang bang*
<Muppet> *die die*
<damnyoure> *bury bury*
<Muppet> *rot rot*
#4231
(unchali) I was in gymnastics til I realized that fat chicks cause earthquakes
#84998
<CtrlAltDestroy> Here is my impression of Wikipedia.
<CtrlAltDestroy> "There are five fingers on the human hand [citation needed]"
#68398
TrogL> the person handing out official photo id will not give you your official photo id unless you have your official photo id
TrogL> 3 people are trying to get her to see the catch-22 and she's not getting it
[...]
TrogL> the lady with the ID's gave up and is now handing them out at random
TrogL> she's not even checking to make sure the picture matches
TrogL> apparently I'm a skanky blonde
TrogL> the guy next door's picture shows him bleeding profusely from a head wound
TrogL> gotta love low-bid contractors
#238
[thinkmad] does anyone know a good car audio site
(McMoo) www.40plus50plus.com
[thinkmad] you fucking bastard moo
[kisama] mcmoo: i have member logins to that site
#50319
mrkemak71: Kens "Avoiding Marital Discord" tip of the day :
mrkemak71: when discussing the price of a pound of shrimp...
mrkemak71: Do NOT figure out how much your wife is worht in shrimp, and then tell her
#113987
<Kodan> I hate lawyers.
<Dwing> I'm a lawyer.
<Dwing> I AM OFFENDED BY YOUR STATEMENT!
<Dwing> <Sues>
<Kodan> <Counter-sues>
<Dwing> <Counter-Counter-Sues>
<Kodan> <Counter-counter-counter-sues>
<Dwing> <Counter-Counter-Counter-Counter-Sues>
<Kodan> <Spray paints self black>
<Kodan> <Pulls out the race card>
<Kodan> OH LAWD! THE WHITE MAN BE A PUTTIN' ME DOWN!
<Kodan> <Calls Al Sharpton>
<Dwing> ...
<Dwing> I bow to your superior tactic D:
#32460
<@splice> got my homestead exemption taken care of this morning, i should get a nice refund on le taxes
<@D-viant> le taxes??? Did you move to le canada?
<@D-viant> or are you just feeling le fruity this morning?
#28864
* lemming almost ejaculates
* lemming rolls on the floor moaning
<[Bond]> 0.o
<Yumi_Saotome> thats too much info right there
<[Bond]> not for me, send pics
#4858
<Puff-working> I play the banjo..never learned fiddle..but I might someday.
<Puff-working> and I can make a harmonica sing.
<Unfor|Work> I play the CD player
#36113
<uidzer0> i'm fucking outta here.. peace!
<-- uidzer0 has quit (Quit: BitchX: try our Windows 95/98 and Windows NT 4 flavors too!)
--> uidzer0 (~uidzer0@68.101.43.169) has joined #solaris
<uidzer0> i do not condone or endorse my last quit message.
<uidzer0> that's all. peace
<-- uidzer0 has quit (Client Quit)
#16839
<Tocool> Im so bored
<Tocool> I can predict my day
<Tocool> I woke up at 12:30, will sit around on computer till about 4, head to work, come back at 10:30, sit on computer till 2, go to bed
<Shaddix> pretty good
<Tocool> This isnt the normal course of action, just recent turn of events have left me with very lil to do
<Shaddix> oh
<Shaddix> impotentcy?
#29844
<Doody> Man.
<Doody> It's sad.
<Doody> When a person doesn't know what GOATSE is.
<Wolfy2779> what's goatse?
#723
<thom> CTCP VERSION: DICKS 2.0 OS, 69 K OF FREE ASS SPACE
<cstone> ALLOCATING PRICKS
<rbw> AHLGUAHGLUHALGUHAGUHAGLUHAG I SEEM TO BE HAVING A BUFFER OVERFLOW PROBLEM HERE PEOPLE
#22052
<TeePeeJah> fuck , I just gave myz elf a huge paper cut opening a hate letter I sent to myz elf :-(
<TeePeeJah> brb plaster required
#230434
<MajorWood> fack
<MajorWood> i just clogged the toilet
<MajorWood> had to put on a latex glove to manually unplug
<LiquidManZero> You fisted your toilet...?
#296936
<@timmo> a friend of mine whos in the airforce
<@timmo> says that since everyone eats mres
<@timmo> and eat at the same time
<@timmo> basically everyone has to shit at the exact same time
<@timmo> so theyll be convoying through the dessert
<@timmo> and all the trucks will stop
<@timmo> and doors will fly open
<@timmo> and everyones shitting out the doors
<@Rjx> meals ready to shit
Comment: #geekissues
#302032
<+MachineDog> ....crap, how do I do the action things?
<+Kitten> you do /me
<+MachineDog> you WISH
Comment: My first day on IRC
#128138
<Options> well, guess my parents dont want me playing phoenix wright in the house anymore :(
<Sylon[DMS]|Around> throw your DS in their face and yell OBJECTION!
<Options> that is....AN AWESOME IDEA
#15024
<river> actually...i don't think there are many levels of monogamy
<river> it's a boolean thing