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#6794
<shawn> refurbished is when something is defective and the manufacturer finds it to be a simple repair and then resells them to cheap bastards like myself
#6282
<tertyl> and i've bent a spoon with the power of my mind...though when the drugs wore off..it was back to normal...
#52635
<@r0bby> you suck all of you
<+mite\> * [r0bby] +#gaygeeks #bimb0 @+#queers @#efnut #psychotic @#asexual #gaypeople +#M-a-t-h
<+mite\> apparently you do too
Comment: #efnut [at] efnet
#310368
<hep> would anyone like to sign up for our trolling ghostwriting service?
<hep> for the busy professional who still wants to troll
<hep> you just give us your nick
<hep> and we troll as you
#19137
[E-vangelist] I was walking through the mall today and everywhere there are
posters advertising Britney Spears brand ROLLER SKATES everywhere
[E-vangelist] I wonder which pharmecutical company is anxiously awaiting the announcement that her cherry's been popped so they can start selling Britney Brand Birth Control pills
#309841
< j0h> Ive been drunk for nearly 2 weeks but jrvc might have a problem.
<@LinearInterpol> j0h: that's called being a system administrator.
#10979
<Dryzzid{SAS}> OOOOOW
<Dryzzid{SAS}> I just sat on my nuts :(
* Jaedra stares at Dryzz
<Jaedra> dude...
<Dryzzid{SAS}> What? I sat down the wrong way..
<Dryzzid{SAS}> I crushed one :(
#57047
<Mel>People make misstakes daniel, ive made plenty misstakes but i try not to make the smae misstake three times
<Mel> same*
#18398
<jitspoe> my hard drive is clicking
<jitspoe> it's the one that fell on my foot and freaked me out :)
<jitspoe> all of a sudden something somewhat large and warm landed on my foot
<jitspoe> ... and i had my pants on
#30065
<@MrSaturn> Friend of mine goes to Fry's
<@MrSaturn> He obsesses over it
<@MrSaturn> He's like
<@MrSaturn> "OMG I FRIED MY MOTHERBOARD! HOORAY!"
#565
<phiber_> where's my boot disk? how can i be a hacker without linux?
#7994
< BigBadGangsta> I swear, I need to write a book called "Stupid shit for stupid fucks"
<@mewse> by a retard, for retards
#3360
<kolby> i dont think the number of times ive jacked off to britney spears can be calculated
<kolby> it never gets old
<kolby> i think that's what love is
#80277
<@nakor> baseball bats remind me of hentai
<@Akamu> ...
<@Akamu> I'm curious on the relation there.
< Syntacs> Once while playing baseball he slid into first (dude, you can keep running, but whatever), and it kind of scraped up his knee, which reminded him of a time as a kid when he idly used an eyedropper to make little suction marks on his legs and the other kids made fun of him the next day, which reminded him of the little suction things on octopus tentacles, and well, the train of thought is obvious from that point.
#2164
::: .signoff@1.32p> m|ch (michelle@XX-XX-XX-XXX.ivideon.com); to get over someone old, get under someone new
#33946
<malady> Hi Pav!
<malady> How's Pravda?
<Pav> Pravda?
<gumby_jd> Probably means Prague...
<Pav> ah! :)
<malady> Yay for being a poorly educated American. ^^
<malady> ...what's the correct spelling?
<Pav> malady: in english Prague, in native language Praha
<malady> Ah... not real sure where I got the vd from.
<malady> ...boy, if I had a nickle for every time I said _that_.
#302356
<Jesus> it gets worse as they get mobile.
<Jesus> I'm pretty convinced that's why most families are smaller: children have gotten better at cockblocking.
<pjustice> there's evolution for you
<Jesus> it's darwinian, after all -- if they can successfully prevent other procreation by their parents, they get a larger piece of the pie.
<Jesus> my 4-year old can now climb the stairs silently.
<paul> holy shit
<paul> nooooooooooo
<Jesus> I tend to wake up as he's running, silently, full bore at my side of the bed.
* Jesus nods
<Jesus> thankfully, the doors still shut.
<paul> they figure doorknobs out too, right?
<paul> they're like little velociraptors
<paul> CLEVER BOY
#153537
<nyschashi> so I'm reading this george bush hentai manga
<nyschashi> it's pretty great
<nyschashi> Bush and Saddam make peace after they gang bang some random girl
<nyschashi> ;/
<nyschashi> the girl then randomly dropkicks Kim Jong-Il
<nyschashi> I'm skipping through about 30 pages at a time, but it looks like george bush randomly turns into a tentacle demon and rapes a bunch of people
#5660
<Sys> I hate maths. What do you reckon they'll do if I fail it?
<0ut_Lore> you repeat it. fail it AGAIN, and you face the exclusion board. guess what they do? ;P
<Sys> Exclude you from having to do it a third time? :D
#3984
[11:29] *** kiwix is now known as kiwiGF
[11:34] *** kiwiGF is now known as kiwix
<mightyflo> that was quick.
#136814
<thefiddler> Holy sonofabitch.
<thefiddler> I think my editor is flirting with me.
* thefiddler frowns
<Uhmerwell> ...Notepad?
<thefiddler> Errr.
<Uhmerwell> oh, you mean a human
<Uhmerwell> don't you :<
#7960
<Agent_grey> Scanner works! scanner wooooorrrkss!!
<artforz> how did you make it work?
<Agent_grey> its very very technical and scientific, involving the introduction of organic substance interfacing with its structural integrity
<Agent_grey> i whacked it really really hard
#8118
[20:52] <MrSnuffles> hello
<MrSnuffles> anyone?
<MrSnuffles> talk to me
<MrSnuffles> ;(
<Bug> hello MrSnuffles
<MrSnuffles> no, not you
#34844
(sean-): me and my girlfriend did the most bad ass thing
(fleet): anal no lube?
#7675
<@WoNkS> omg it came up already
<@motardo> your wang?