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#56912
<HajuuNOT-NZ> im going on a date tommorow :/
<HajuuNOT-NZ> not sure why
<cai> Parents haven't had that talk with you yet, I see
#266625
kwenda: this lady who works here is so disgusting
kwenda: fat and ugly
kwenda: she rubbed my hair in the middle of a meeting
kwenda: i stood up and left the meeting without saying anything
kwenda: went to supercuts and got a shampoo and a haircut
kwenda: walked back into the meeting and sat down
#22443
<DarKHawK> Hows this, I get told to create a /dev dir for a developer I say no and he says he is the developer and thats what he wants it called
#297660
<ambulance> so I have an amusing trojan that opens a command prompt ever 12 hours and links me to 'macho man' on youtube
<ambulance> I think I'll keep it
#38426
<@ara> Occupation: psychologist
<@ara> Smoker: No
<@ara> Drinker: No
<@ara> sweet
<@ara> she can deal with me fine
<@ara> i dont drink i dont smoke
<@ara> and im insane
Comment: #SBK, irc.enterthegame.com
#207998
<Fudoushin> I must've gotten into the Japanese language for the stupidest reason...
<Fudoushin> I like anime, Japanese video games (RPGs mainly), and manga.
<Fudoushin> So I majored in it in college. Which is really not that far removed from majoring in African-American Studies because you enjoy '70s blaxploitation films...
#307007
< Neoinr> Bust a move
< Bucket> mo ve
#40752
<WillDeed> god damn I'm smooth
<WillDeed> so I went to 7-11 to buy a pack of smokes
<WillDeed> and the chick starts flirting with me because
<WillDeed> well
<WillDeed> you know
<WillDeed> she pulls down a pack, hides it, and says "sorry, we're out of those *giggle*"
<WillDeed> and I tried to laugh without laughing to show courtesy but to show it wasn't funny
<WillDeed> and it came out as a snort
<WillDeed> and the rest of the transaction was made in silence
<WillDeed> and I kinda ran into the door when I was leaving
<WillDeed> <- smooth
#28927
<[Knob]> So anyway, I was in this pub yesterday night, and there was music playing. So my friend suddenly says to me "This is good music to jerk off to" I'm like "What the fuck?" and he goes "Yeah, doesn't everyone have a song that they jerk off to?" - And while he said that, the music was turned off and he screamed it throughout the entire pub. Everyone was looking mighty strange at me...
#39529
<Raxor> I love the way my mom bursts into my room while I'm masturbating
<Raxor> then when I suddenly lean forward to cover my genitals she stands there and pretends nothing happened
<Raxor> just looks straight at me and says "come set the table"
<Raxor> then she kept standing there until I finally said, "okay..."
<Borisyen> she was waiting to be asked to 'help out' bwahahaha
<Raxor> then as she was leaving I noticed I never turned the porn off, so there was some girl sucking on a dick on the screen the whole time
<Raxor> well bbl.. I've got to do some awkward table setting.
#29407
<Synlor> want jesus to rise from the grave and rape me
<Synlor> twice
<TiTaN> STFU faggot.
<Synlor> dont be all jealous just cause our savior thinks im hot and youre not
#87607
<+r4v5> so i just learned that hank aaron was black
<+aydiosmio> was?
<+aydiosmio> he's still alive
<+r4v5> i just learned that hank aaron is alive
#303089
<Iridium> it's funny
<Iridium> I saw that there's an article on the NYT about how we can't focus anymore with all this multitasking
<Iridium> so I opened it in a new tab and went to finish reading my other RSS items
<Iridium> and then checked email, and facebook
<Iridium> and am updating you all here
<Iridium> and ten minutes later just realized I haven't looked at the article yet. =/
#44447
<sEcretz> This is scary but 5 years ago when i was still 12 and just found out IRC i used to sign in and act as if im a girl just coz of the curiosity. Im guilty! kill me now!
<SeXy|GirL> Oh... talking about confessions...
* SeXy|GirL is now known as SeXy|BoY
<sEcretz> Damn it..... i cybered with you :(
#250885
<Tomm> ... I am speechless.
<Tomm> I was randomly watching Youtube stuff when I saw a link to Never Gonna Give You Up
<Tomm> And I thought to myself... "Hey, that's a cool song, and I haven't heard it in a while"
<Tomm> So I clicked it
<Tomm> ...Chocolate Rain.
<Tomm> I JUST GOT FUCKING REVERSE RICKROLLED.
#302145
< incluye> Oh my fucking are you serious
< incluye> Today's the day for Lesson 4.04 in Modern World Studies in my online course.
< incluye> GUESS WHAT ERROR I GET WHEN I GO TO IT
#295604
<archtech> An interesting experiment: cover your eyes fully so that no light leaks through. You'll always think you see some light leak through. Ask your friend to turn off the light, or do nothing. When he turns it off, you'll still see phantom leaking light.
<awormus> now I know the guy who is sitting next to me is on this channel because he's sitting here with his hands over his eyes
Comment: #phpc freenode
#47292
<sleepwlkr> Oh gosh, I met a really annoying Yankee bitch a moment ago at Rautatientori Square. She and her family were looking for a restaurant where they could get decent meat. First I thought I'd guide them to a good eating place, but that stupid cow complained about everything all the time and specified what the restaurant SHOULDN'T be like, so I told the whole family the way to a gay bar and said "Only the best for the lady".
<sleepwlkr> I just had to go to a pub opposite the gay bar for a beer and see their faces when they come out
<sleepwlkr> Well the bitch was yelling at her husband whose face had turned red with anger. Their kids seemed to be just laughing at the incident :-)
<sleepwlkr> Now I'm a bit disappointed that I didn't bring my camera with me.
Comment: Translated from Finnish to English.
#22893
<Ch33ky> is this the internet?
#85791
dftpnkezln: For all of you reporting a score more than 100 as you iq lol @ you. How can you possibly score more than 100%?
dftpnkezln:I'm very happy with my score of 89.
#306376
* tanuki_ wonders idly why HDSLRs don't pull rows from their sensors in a different order
<tanuki_>if we have a 10-line sensor, for instance, instead of pulling 1-2-3-4-5..., we could pull 1-5-10-3-7-2-9-4-8-6 or something
<tanuki_>it seems like that'd get rid of the worst part of rolling shutter: the diagonal wobble
<tanuki_>there'd still be some rolling shutter but it'd be distributed across the entire frame instead of being concentrated at the bottom
<dif>u should write up a technical white paper about this
<dif>instead of typing it on irc where it'll scroll of your audience's screen
<dif>i'll read it. i promise.
<tanuki_>Consider this a very rudimentary form of peer review
<tanuki_>Talking about it on IRC allows for an instant "it won't work because [reason], dumbass"
<tanuki_>instead of the whole months-long writing of the paper and submission to a journal for official peer review...
<tanuki_>just to be told the same damn thing: "are you really that much of a dumbass?"
<cwage>are you really that much of a dumbass?
<tanuki_>Yes. Yes, I am.
Comment: freenode #photogeeks
#3483
<Darksyde> dood you make texas look like a big dildo
<blazemore> i'd rather be a big dildo than a small dildo
<blazemore> especially the kind the secretes fake jizz that tastes like oranges
<Geek-> lol
<Geek-> how would you know about that shit?
* blazemore is away
#53580
<%DjdeepVibe> do you have "invisible" background?
<%DjdeepVibe> hard to read on black :P
<&Druadan> You should use less cuky colour schemes
<&Druadan> sucky, even
<%DjdeepVibe> i use console-style :)
<%DjdeepVibe> green on black
<%DjdeepVibe> it´s cool, and better for my eyes :)
<&Druadan> That's called the "I wish I was in the Matrix" colour scheme
#307117
<Q-Stone> woot now I have 2.5 GB of space on Dropbox!
* BadMojo starts downloading Q-Stone's stuff from Dropbox. Man, nothing but horse porn.
<Q-Stone> Encrypted horse porn!
<BadMojo> If it was encrypted, how would I know what it is?
<Q-Stone> By the file name: horseporn12.enc
<Switchbreak> badmojo knows an encrypted horse when he sees one
<Switchbreak> just has to glance at the data
<Q-Stone> He can tell from the bits
<BadMojo> It's like the matrix.
<Q-Stone> He doesn't even see the code anymore, just Arabian, Clydesdale, Quarter
Comment: #gwj on quakenet
#6651
<Kron-Away> iam an accountant
<Kron-Away> 1,2,3,5,6,9,10
<Mr_Squidgy> kron what comes after 10 :P
<Kron-Away> my 15%