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#1206
<cooey> brb going to efnet under the proxy sawgrass.massopac.navy.mil and telling people to join the millitary
#160337
<@Ushanka> So, guys. I was reading a book about steganography, but I've lost my place.
<@Ushanka> This is a really good story about antigravity. I can't put it down!
<Mizzle> I fucking love this book about bibliophilia.
<@Ushanka> I started reading the Wikipedia article on gauntlets but stopped when it got too heavy-handed for my tastes.
<@Ushanka> I was reading the racy memoirs of a Wellington debutante but it made me feel a little sheepish.
<@Jello> I got all wrapped up in a book about bondage.
<Mizzle> I wasn't very far into my text on psychological trauma when I had to stop. It hurt too much.
<@Ushanka> The whole nation is abuzz for the new apiculture guide!
Comment: #thedryeraseboard on espernet
#17397
<SAMMY> i'm so fucking HAMMERINAEOAED
<SAMMY> i'm getting pototao ships
<SAMMY> chiptns
<SAMMY> fuck it
<LoRdZephyR> SHIPS
<LoRdZephyR> LOL
<LoRdZephyR> gonna go sailing?
<SAMMY> fucking chopked on a ship
<SAMMY> CHOCKING NO FUCKING SHIPS
#27151
Ali: do they sell dildos on overstock?
Tim: lol, i don't know
Tim: why?
Tim: gonna get a gift for your gf?
Ali: everything i buy on that site, i'm gonna add dildo to the list
Ali: so that it shows up for every product
Ali: people who purchased... "the bible" also purchased... "travel reading lamp" .. "jesus loves all the little children" ... "clear plastic dildo" ... "a kid's guide to the bible"
#27665
<lictor> my dad asked my why i didn't talk to him or anyone for that matter....
<lictor> and i couldn't say "i just don't really like any of you and feel its worth my time..." so i grunted
#22932
<sampson> rad, that link crashed my browser in the middle of booking a flight
<sampson> EXCELLENT
<sampson> THANKS!
<aves2k> sorry if your browser doesn't support new Internet technologies
<aves2k> like JPG
#7461
<Poltergeist21>I want to fuck the olsen twins right in the ass!!
<Poltergeist21>Dude, my balls goin smack smack smack against their teen asses..yum yum!1
<Charlesowns>Dude, i said that ten years ago!
#56801
<LabMonkey> damnit
<LabMonkey> there went my afternoon
<LabMonkey> THANKS FOR RUINING MY LIFE, KARMA
<KArmA> its what I do
<KArmA> try and be a better person
Comment: #bifemunix on EFnet
#29009
<cstine> my libido pretty much vanished after i gave up porn.
<cstine> not that it's a bad thing.
<cstine> i don't have to do as many sheets in the laundry now.
<cstine> or towels.
#38985
<BiscuitLynai> 4 days from now is the anniversay of alliyah's death =(
<Gabriel> I remember when she died
<Gabriel> I felt bad masturbating to a dead person
Comment: #forum-m@irc.freenode.net
#294756
< n0p> hey i'm looking for a php web-based front end to control linux files and permissions. can anyone suggest any decent open source projects?
<+bradD> igotrooted-0.2
< n0p> link me
< n0p> pls?
#20573
<asshat> I just chipped a tooth on one of my nuts
<asshat> fuck
<asshat> brb
#301252
<@snow_> i think i could have definitely stolen this chick from her loser boyfriend
<@snow_> but i fucked up
<@snow_> tried to call her fat
<@snow_> so she would come work out w/ me
<@snow_> that backfired hard
Comment: #geekissues
#220694
<@r0cko> i think im getting to old for video games, I was playing NCAA and my fucking moron QB fumbled on the last play of the game that would have been a touchdown and won the game for me, so I take the controller and slam one of the corners on my desk and it exploded into about 50 pieces, when I was a kid I was never strong enough to break shit...damn
#23787
<+bos> you said farewell to irc
<@d0e> for a while
<@Nfs> yeah, d0e left for a while
<@Nfs> till i made him an oper
<@d0e> and i said oooooooooooooook
<@nick> YOU MADE HIM AN OPER HE CANT REFUSE!
#296542
<+Trinexx> my girlfriend logged into my WoW account and setup a fucking parental control lock
<+Trinexx> so now I can't play while she's at work
<+Trinexx> *rages*
#13068
<Rjx> hmm.....goatse.cx is a better link
<ganonboy> what section of the site are the ROMS in?
<ganonboy> ? is it http://www.goatse.cx
<ganonboy> ??
<Rjx> yup
<ganonboy> I dont see any N64 roms?
<Rjx> what do you see?
<ganonboy> A sick picture...
<Rjx> click on it
<Rjx> it's an imagemap
<Rjx> click on his ass
<ganonboy> you are lying
<Rjx> did you try it?
<ganonboy> yes
<ganonboy> and nothing happens
#68631
<@reed> Anybody run a Microsoft FTP server?
<@CTho> haha
<@CTho> i did that once
<@CTho> and then I was suddenly hosting warez and no longer in control of my computer
#5836
<PhantomOfTheRouter> never got another call from them till they bought a new accounting package that needed Win95
<PhantomOfTheRouter> and Novell for the servers..
<PhantomOfTheRouter> went in to upgrade the machines..
<PhantomOfTheRouter> moved the first 2 workgroup servers to Novell 4.11
<PhantomOfTheRouter> couldn't find the third
<PhantomOfTheRouter> asked them where they moved it to...
<PhantomOfTheRouter> umm, moved ?
<PhantomOfTheRouter> yeah, where did you move WKG3SRV to ?
<PhantomOfTheRouter> ummm...
<PhantomOfTheRouter> we didn't change anything
<PhantomOfTheRouter> You had to have moved it when you remodelled the office! The wiring closet in the hall is gone...
<PhantomOfTheRouter> oh shit!
#307755
<Black_Prince> I haven't left house for 7 days now!
<Black_Prince> :D
<AdmiralA> oh great, people are bragging about not going outside like it's uptime now
<AdmiralA> $ indoors
<AdmiralA> 21:40 not seen light in 2 days, 6:39, 3 meals, kcal averages: 0.23 0.13 0.09
#42149
<J3anyus> shit, i'm very conservative but god damn, legalize weed
<richo_> if you had weed and alcohol legal
<richo_> and after 2 months
<richo_> asked the population which one should be outlawed..
<richo_> it'd pry be the one that causes daddy to hit you
<richo_> not the one that causes daddy to cook extra kraft dinner
#306540
<pawz> i use lilo :") in fact.. my first cat was called Lilo
<pawz> i would take him to the vet and they would be like "Oh, Lilo, from the Disney movie" and i would say "Oi, check his birth date. he was born years before that shitty movie. his name is short for LInux LOader"
<Stranj> And then the vet gave you a shot to calm you down?
Comment: #lulz
#1353
<Gayo> I went with purple even though two characters wear purple and the first city is made entirely of purple buildings.
<Gayo> Which means that so far the only green is in the little "occupied" lights above the bedroom doors.
<Sharkey> ... that sounds really familiar for some reason. Probably reminding me of some retarded childrens program.
<Sharkey> Something where all the people are purple and live in purple houses and have purple lawns, until mysterious green men come from the moon and everybody learns the wonders of ethnic diversity.
<Sharkey> Well slap ma fro! Where da purple woman at? Where da purple woman at? "Kill the greenie!"
#15443
<ZondrZout> "you"
<teig> you what?
<Karyon> Euhm? just "you"
<ZondrZout> Yes, you
<teig> I'd what you?
<teig> I'd wad you... is that a good thing?
<Karyon> Yes, wadding is our special treat
<ZondrZout> Not many people get wadded by us
<Karyon> nobody yet, actually
<ZondrZout> No, we've never done it before now I think of it
<Karyon> in fact i havent even created tha alias yet...
<Karyon> Cuz we only just invented it
<ZondrZout> I've actually never ever heard of it before !
#50427
<bog2435> i wunna ask bout INVERT in msPaint -> i invert the image, save.. but then when i open it and invert it it goes backwards to the original!
<bog2435> how do i save it inverted so it can't be reversed to the original.. i want to protect my photo from steal, see!