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#78929
<riko> dammit this has gotta stop.
<Baph> ?
<riko> my stepdad's been using my computer, going on porn, and saving it onto my desktop with the filenames set as numbers so i don't know what it is and i have to click on it to check.
<Baph> I thought your stepdad was gay?
<riko> precisely.
#29386
<Supachikn> can anyone offer advice on how to de-scratch a cd?
<Supachikn> both small, medium, and large scratches
<JohnMK> Meguiars #7 or somesuch
<JohnMK> groups.google.com it
<JohnMK> I bought something at Software Etc. or whatever that seems to work pretty well
<wildboar> yeah I know this guy that bought the big pro scratch remover machines
<wildboar> and I smelled the stuff
<wildboar> and I was like wtf that is the meguiars #7 showcar glaze I use on my car
<Supachikn> so just this car-polish and a buffing with a soft cloth?
<Seed> a little jizz on the cloth won't hurt too
<Supachikn> :( I'm all dry at the moment
Comment: #hydrogenaudio on freenode
#20987
[21:13] (@KOLDSTARE): I was informed this is a rich part of town
[21:14] (@KOLDSTARE): wore my leather jacket to dinner and I got stared at
[21:14] (@KOLDSTARE): its not like I ripped it off a cow and stuck a zipper on it
#50745
<Philwelch> In my high school, I would print out the "this page is blocked" page that comes up when you run afoul of the content filter on the library computers, and post it next to the anti-censorship posters in the library.
<Philwelch> Long story made short, the library ultimately took down the anti-censorship posters.
#61462
(@b) core, do you live in germany or austria
(+core) why do you ask?
(@b) I was wondering if my arm was rubber, how far it would need to stretch to punch you in the face
#304174
<Spance> "Certainly Java got a lot right - its used by 10 million developers."
<Spance> THERE ARE 350-500 MILLION CASES OF MALARIA A YEAR
<\> are you arguing that malaria isn't successful?
#1119
<iMike> monty python would be funny if nerds hadnt invented an entire subculture devoted to quoting it
#31568
<Moushi> My friend is over
<Moushi> And he's ion thye bathroom right now
<Moushi> And he's been in there for a loing time
<Moushi> And I can hear... sounds
<Moushi> What do I do
<BHedL> jump in there with no clothes on but womens undergarments and a scary rubber mask
<Moushi> But he would ejaculate in terror all over me!
<BHedL> well, then you start a fetish porn site
<Moushi> His dad's a lawyer
<Moushi> He would sue me
<BHedL> nah, with the immense amount of money you´ll be making off of your ¨crossdresser rubber mask bukkakae¨, you could just hire him as your own lawyer
<Moushi> hahaha
<Moushi> Yeah, but then he wouldn
<Moushi> 't be my friend
<BHedL> how do you know that he isnt there masturbating to the very mental image of you in womens undergaments with a big scary rubber mask on?
<Moushi> How about I just run in, scream in hiorror, and kick him in the balls?
<BHedL> theres no money in that
<Moushi> You make a compelling argument.
#8343
Valvados (~Draco@12.21.190.1957) is now known as Valv|Nekkid
<Valv|Nekkid> My roommate is giving me the strangest look.
#28892
<@demalavor> I finally got to try krispy kreme
<@demalavor> <3
<@demalavor> the lady there scared me though
<@demalavor> I walked in and she jumped out from the corner and was like "FREE SAMPLE YAAAAA!!"
#304001
Liam: Are you familiar with Cleverbot?
Scaramouche: Yes.
Scaramouche: She's fun.
Liam: I have two instances of cleverbot talking to each other.
Liam: Although a lot of what they're saying is quite dadaistic
Liam: -Why are all your family and friends working?
-We are not.
-Yes you are.
-Why do you think so?
-Because your math skills are horrible. 198 minus 7 is 191.
-My marbles are right where I need them. Under the feet of my enemies...
Liam: -I have no marshmallows.
#5597
<Elfin> lkmwclldsldldldldldld,e,e,e,e,e,,e,e,e,e,e,,e,e,e,e,e,,e,e,e,e,e,e
,e,e,e,,,,eee,e,olwowowoowolsalslslsllslslslslslslllsllsllsllslls lsls
<Elfin> That was me playing keyboard drums.
<memo> Rock on.
<Elfin> You know it.
#781
<D1> mp3[01 - s~1] [1m47s/1.23mb/96kbps]
<D1> arg
<D1> i need one of those mp3 name thingies
#23787
<+bos> you said farewell to irc
<@d0e> for a while
<@Nfs> yeah, d0e left for a while
<@Nfs> till i made him an oper
<@d0e> and i said oooooooooooooook
<@nick> YOU MADE HIM AN OPER HE CANT REFUSE!
#21600
<Casper> I gotta shit..
<Casper> But I'm lazy.
<wex> same here
<wex> im at 65% shit level
<wex> 100% is when i shit my pants
<Phucker> haha
<Casper> I'm at like 73%
<Casper> and rising
<Casper> (I'm eating)
#27353
<Jezzy> gimme all you lovin
<Jezzy> all your hugs and kisses too
* iMav|Movie gives Jezzy some lovin.
<Jezzy> eep!
* Jezzy gives iMav his lovin back.
<Jezzy> can I get a refund?
<Jezzy> I think its defective.
<Ghaleon> Ouch.
<iMav|Movie> I can give you a certificate for other iMav products.
<Jezzy> No, im pretty sure you've tainted them all.
#609
n e r d b 5: DUDE
n e r d b 5: shania twain is only 20 years older than me.... i might have a chance one day, since she isnt that much older than me
#295392
< beoba> i d8ed a guy who couldnt get work study because harvard was giving more money than federal rules allowed
< Sub-Zero> you know, it took me a few seconds to understand d8ed.
< Divine> it's some kind of g8alk
Comment: #raspberryheaven
#303058
<DuClare> The presence of tech people is what made freenode really different
<DuClare> But these days I'm on #freenode helping people buy a dog kennel because they can't comprehend inches and feet
#3577
<Corranfox> GF?
<metroid23> you'll get it eventually...
<Corranfox> guitar freaks
<blazemore> it's not like it'd stand for girl friend.. this IS #bemani after all
#2128
<stretch> !seen tits
* Trivial_ has never seen tits. Sorry!
#2648
<inverse> dick is like the most popular first name for congressmen
#52087
<@ALGORYTHM> got my road tax
<@ALGORYTHM> some sikh guy and his gf in the post office hate me now
<@ALGORYTHM> they started off, very long queue btw
<@ALGORYTHM> talking about the hair on his back :/
<@ALGORYTHM> bleh and i had to stand there and listen
<@ALGORYTHM> then they started talking about lost and wondering who dies in series two
<@ALGORYTHM> so i told them and they're like wtf
<+McFly> lol
<@ALGORYTHM> i said, i didn't want to know about the hair on your back and you didn't want to know about the spoiler
<@ALGORYTHM> so i think we're even
Comment: still on season 1 in the uk
#42655
<Geoff> I caught my son downloading a file called 'hot redhead takes it up the ass and loves it'
<Geoff> I was appalled
<Geoff> She was blonde and was giving hand jobs :(
#21415
<Yuuhi> i found some info
<Yuuhi> whooooooo!
<OdinBomber> ah..ok
<OdinBomber> must have been my chi transcending the internet
<Yuuhi> =D
<Silverwolf> Whenever my chi transcends the internet, I need to clean up afterwards XD