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#52103
<Sp3cial> haha, I was at Big W earlier and they had one of those display PC's running
<Sp3cial> it didn't have a mouse, but it had a keyboard.
<Sp3cial> my keyring is a USB pen drive.
<Sp3cial> long story short, WMP is now looping a 19 year old virgin getting pounded by a large tentacle monster.
<Sp3cial> and to make it worse, I unplugged the keyboard.
#301129
<Jake> I had an awesome moment in my college
<Jake> We had a video project due, and this group of wanna-be programmers were saying how theirs was so awesome
<Jake> While they weren't looking, I yelled "WE SUCK PENIS" and added it into the slide show after one of the people said "What do we do?"
<Dan> LOL
<Jake>They must have caught me
<Jake>When the day came, while waiting for the part
<Jake>One of the guy asks "Jake, what does your family do every Wednesday night?"
<Jake>In my voice, it yelled "WE SUCK PENIS"
<Jake>I should've been mad... but I was far too astounded to be mad..
#11154
<Tridon> hate cold water
* Tridon left the shower in a huff!
<Iksion> tridon ah your willy has shrinked in cold water?
<Tridon> this morning I had to talk him down, just so that I could take a piss... Now he's not even there any longer
#4039
<kapusta> Slut: a woman that fucks everyone. Bitch: a woman that fucks everyone but you...
#20553
<SACS|Maul555> download 5t5ha55t
<SaintDuriel> jeeze whats with your 5 man... if you hit a key close to it does it do a five?
<SACS|Maul555> ive5 been leaving m5y lap5top on 24/7... 5think 5t5ha5ts bad 5fo5r a lap5top?
<Gorin> yes, now fix the your five button
<SACS|Maul555> i 5cant5 i glu5d i5t, bu5t 5th5e glue 5cam5e o5f5f5
<SACS|Maul555> 5yo5u5 don5t unde5rs5tan5d 5the 5 bu5t5ton is missin5g... ho5w i5t 5came ou5t is wha5ts 5causin5g 5the 5p5roblem
<Gorin> uh huh
<SACS|Maul555> 5the sp5r5ing und5e5rne5a5th is b5roken... so 5th5e li5t5tl5e me55chanism k5ee5ps 5tou5chin5g 5the pad
<Gorin> i think you're lying.
<SACS|Maul555> 5can i 5type 5this 5fas5t5 an5d pu5t in5e55r5ro5rs on5 pu5rpos5e?
<SACS|Maul555> pff5t
#31494
<Meph|st0> Complaint : BOUGTH IT FOR MY COUSIN WHO HAD CANCER, ITEM NEVER ARRIVED AND MY COUSIN DIED
<Meph|st0> thats the greatest ebay feedback i have ever seen
#27910
<Enrico> do you like your co-workers
<Thibster> I'd like them to leave me alone
<Enrico> have you tried shooting them... I bet you didn't.
<Thibster> no I tried
<Thibster> they respawn
#45328
<qviri> Sorry, I guess I'm not 1335 enough.
#10767
<angie> yea, finally finished moving all my stuff in today.
<guyen> can't be that bad, she's pretty hot. i could tap dat azz all day
<guyen> godamn i need a picture of her so i can at least jerk off to it
<angie> isn't she in your class, just stare at her with your photographic memory.
<guyen> believe me i do, she's got an azzzzzzz
<angie> she's also right behind me.
<guyen> are you serious?
<angie> yea. she says you're pretty cute too. says you should have the balls to ask her out though.
<guyen> um, will you go out with me?
<angie> she says yes. pick her up tomm 7:30 after her evening class, she wants to see kate and leopold or whatever.
<guyen> are you kidding me? holy shit! im calling your house now
<angie> no i'm just fucking with you.
<guyen> your're a bitch you know that
<angie> i know.
#40674
<@lucid> I need something to do.
<@lucid> I dont start work until tommorrow
<@PJD> hrmm
<@PJD> watch porn
<@lucid> nah, thats a night thing
<@PJD> order some pizza
<@lucid> im broke
<@PJD> hrmm
<@lucid> hah
<@lucid> I have herb and diet coke
<@lucid> thats about it
<@PJD> go to a mall and tell kids santa claus doesnt exist
#52935
During 2005 NYC MTA strike...
ZeK666: "Breaking news: Bush attempting to intervene, said he feels confident he can solve this problem because has managed similar situations in Railroad Tycoon."
#13474
<Rottingbeef> i live in "yawn" america
<Rottingbeef> but im only 11, so dont think im some serial killer
#30594
<J3anyus> i just received a sign from god that i'm going to get laid at the concert i go to tonight
<J3anyus> i was coming home and decided to check my mail, even though i wasn't expecting anything
<J3anyus> opened it up, and there was a little envelope
<J3anyus> opened that up, inside was a "FREE SAMPLE FROM TROJAN CONDOMS!"
#16737
<Joelz> How good is it, when you've badly gotta take a leak....but you can't be stuffed getting up, but there is an empty coke bottle next to you and....nevermind.
<Bigchris> what happens if you have to chuck a shit?
<Joelz> That's what shoes are for.
#7463
<tris> why did someone stick an altoid in your cd player?
<furyoujin> tris, we were having phun and he got a lil overexcited
#130058
<@flamingspinach> lol I haven't printed out my schedule yet since my printer is out of ink
<@flamingspinach> but luckily I only have four classes today
<@flamingspinach> and by some amazing coincidence
<@flamingspinach> the first one's in tutorial room 16
<@flamingspinach> the second one is in lecture theater 9
<@flamingspinach> the third one is in tutorial room 25
<@flamingspinach> and the fourth one is in lecture theater 1
<@flamingspinach> how neat is that
<@flamingspinach> oddly 4351 is also the four-digit extension of the zipcode of my house lmao so this is easy to remember :OOOOOOOOOO
<aperson> flamingspinach I think your university is trying to tell you that you are a square
Comment: #machogang on popn.cjb.net:4400
#37991
<VooDoo-chan> im sitting at home watching TV with my girlfriend, Amanda, last night... her daughter is sitting on the floor in front of us eating Jell-O... she asks me "Sean, what is Jell-O?" i look over at Amanda and she looks at me waiting for me to answer her daughter... i turn back to Tesley and tell her "Well, honey, Jell-O is made from Crushed Unicorns"...
<VooDoo-chan> whole lot of crying happened after that
#112136
<Thalagyrt> i've just brought it up in the admin board, i'll give it a few days for people to discuss
<Sam> Cool.
<Thalagyrt> then i'll let you know and you can decide if you want to help out or not :p
<Sam> thanks.
<Thalagyrt> there will be an initiation ceremony involving a goat, three frogs, a crooked wooden stick, and a condom
<Sam> I'm not a fan of condoms.
<Sam> I'll go without.
<Sam> The rest is fine.
<Thalagyrt> okay.
#331
<Dipstick> I saw my Univ. Physics prof. at anime club : |
<Dipstick> and he has a Card Captor Sakura wallscroll in his office (that's pretty damn fruity)
<guDgiD> Dipstick: BLACKMAIL
<Dipstick> NO!
<Dipstick> actually, there's a no hentai policy there :
#30618
[niffie] I have no inhabitions right now
[aphr0] would you finger my asshole?
[niffie] no
[aphr0] then you have inhibitions
#15422
<loud_as_it_getz> yea well
<@KittenAssassin> .........
<loud_as_it_getz> does n e 1 actually chat on mirc??
<@KittenAssassin> no
<Simwolf> nope
<@KittenAssassin> we chat on IRC
<Simwolf> no one at all
<@KittenAssassin> you must be in the wrong place
<Simwolf> absolutely not a FUCKING soul
<loud_as_it_getz> wich is?
<@KittenAssassin> just type /s IRC
<@KittenAssassin> and you will be re directed to IRC
*** Quits: loud_as_it_getz (mary@210.50.66.28738) (Need more parameters)
#53608
ChaOSv2: hehe xbox 360 ... 'end up where you started'
#45519
<Aero`> i have created food
<Aero`> without injury
<Aero`> hooray
#46199
<DrWorm> shit
<putaid> what?
<DrWorm> I just fucked over Josh bad
<putaid> how?
* Joshinator has joined #myhead
<DrWorm> I screwed his girlfriend
<Joshinator> who the what now?
Comment: he found out :-X
#3762
<[ric]> god, damnit... wished I had never started on that gothornot.com ... I'll never get any work done now.