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#17363
<@SixSyx6> ugly is ok as long as I don't have to kiss them
<@SixSyx6> or look at them
#7173
<Ice|P> blow jobs r better
<mk4> why because you get a load in the mouth
<nim-zero> a load in the mouth is worth two in the hand
#50344
<che> there's a programmer's union?
<Wintermute> yes
<Wintermute> Local 100100101110101010010
#1567
<ckx> i wish i had a gf who was into really cheap things
<ckx> like 5 cent rings from vending machines
<ckx> then i'd be in heaven
<ckx> "yah i got you something today... it's a gumball"
<ckx> "OH WOW LETS FUCK"
<ckx> stupid women
<mdl> haha
#1906
(|Chris) CNN (Las Vegas, NV) New York has NOT been bombed. David Copperfield has come forward and stated that, "It was all just mirrors. I'm sorry that it got out of hand. This was just a publicity stunt that went horribly wrong."
#997
<theR> I'm glad I remembered I'm an idiot before I started to set up a wins proxy
#305796
<Bunsen> Imagine a twinkie represents the normal amount of Murphy's Law activity at a nuclear power plant.
<Bunsen> Based on the current situation at Fukushima No. 1, their Twinkie is about thirty-five feet long, weighing approximately six hundred pounds.
#28977
<danamania> oh this is lovely - mum went to the vet to pick up sasha, and bought a few things back. I'm looking over this bottle of pet shampoo thinking I'd do kokomo's coat.
<danamania> The back of the fricken bottle says "Not tested on animals"
#43098
* Beska changes topic to 'next one to change the topic is gya'
* Beska changes topic to 'next one to change the topic is gay'
#6152
<Total_Phreax0r> -LagServ- Your ping request will be considered and might be returned in January 2003
#8215
<DotSPF> man, my mate is a complete div.
<DotSPF> he asked for my help coz he'd forgotten his hotmail password - I go round to see if he's put in a secret question so I can resurrect his account.
<DotSPF> what a prick
<DotSPF> his secret question was 'what is my password'
<DotSPF> i'm gonna go out and see if I can find him a cheap iMac
#14627
*** Lachlann was kicked by Gromph (omg , are u illeterate?)
#311214
<&kapitank> oh wow a mistype such a rare thing that deserves being pointed out every time it hapens =^)
<~LexPro> hapens
<&T2norway> hapens
#80426
Zipper: wtf
Zipper: i'm too fuckin tired to be legally allowed to be awake
Zipper: i just pressed Windows+L to logoff
Zipper: and upon seeing the logon screen
Zipper: i typed my password to log back in.
Zipper: why?
Zipper: i have no fucking clue...
#25185
<Morelos> i think i want the rtfm shirt
<maxracer> whats rtfm
<Morelos> maxracer - i suggest you rtfm to find out
<maxracer> man rftm?
#18162
Wangtangs2 <AUTO-REPLY> : taking a dump ;) >:o PUSH!!!
PRoGRaMMeRQ: I'm taking a screenshot of that and pasting that on my front website
#300771
[Marcus] : So I'm filling out an injury report for one of our stunt men...
[Greta] : Oh no what happened?
[Marcus] : He busted his nose in a stunt no big deal it happens. But the answers for the questions on the forms...
[Marcus] : How did the employee injure himself: his head was getting pushed into a toilet.
[Marcus] : Would this be a common work place injury: yes
[Marcus] : Statement made by employee: it's ok john, next week I get to hit you with a car
#44362
<Raticide> make install
<Raticide> oi you people
<Raticide> get out of my terminal
#33547
<JerryBeep> There are two kinds of jokes in the world: Jokes that people respond to by saying "lol" and funny jokes.
<BAng> lol
<JerryBeep> you bastard.
#14502
<Asaki|MotS> You are not logged in or you do not have permission to access this page, perhaps because you do not have a registered Something Awful Forums account. Here are the instructions detailing how to get your own SA Forums account:
<Friction> Asaki|MotS: you aren't missing much though. just some sexually explict drawings and a rotaing anus with blinking text.
#9670
<[ryan]> nah when i first saw porn of any kind i was like "man, that must get boring after a while"
<[ryan]> then i went back to programming heh
<shea_> when i first saw programming
<shea_> i was like
<shea_> "man, that must get boring after a while"\
<shea_> then i went back to porn
#12200
<@jade> i wanna jenny jones makeover
<@skold> 1-800-96-jenny?
<@jade> NOT JENNY CRAIG
#19301
<deimos> i'm rereading brave new world and 1984
<deimos> so i can figure out the proper way to act in this new mccarthism
<Twid> rat out all your friends
#311629
< jayis> yesterday my architect said our base64 encoded username "token" is encrypted and i said it isn't and then he said it is and i said it isnt and then he walked away
#141
<ILLogik> i was having cybersex with this chick but she wouldn't go all the way so i had to rape her