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#42730
<Scoth> I used a BSOD screensaver at work for awhile, but people kept rebooting my machine for me
#310212
<Bike> When I imagine x86 I imagine a Swiss Family Robinson style treehouse, with parts continually bursting into flame underneath as they build higher and higher on the broken remnants of what they slapped together last week.
#32782
<@Jon> Your eyes are like two limpid pools of loveliness, your hair is like a golden waterfall.
<@Jon> Plus those short skirts you wear make me really horny.
Comment: #rohitab irc.wikkedwire.com
#308036
<nupanick> What part of the day do you most associate with masturbation?
<GreyMaria> awake
#35796
* Bekka reads about a guy who took five years to publish his web site
<takkaria> it must have been a very slow connection
#28804
<danamania> yay I fixed my laptops battery!
<danamania> it was so dead, nothing would charge it
<danamania> so I gave it the electronic equivalent of a kick in the head, by shorting the +/- terminals for 5 minutes
<gelfie> don't they have stickers on them that say they could explode or catch fire by doing that?
<danamania> yeah but it's ok, I took them off first.
#60331
<brisbane> I got a knock on my door and as i was expecting a girlfriend I was naked, I opened it and it was two Jehova Witnessees. Needless to say they didnt stay long and never came back.
#308345
<eli> lesson learned: rm ** does not just remove all files that end with * :/
#5967
<ToiletDuk> you're an idiot
<Lucent-H> you have a job!
<Lucent-H> okay, now you tell another lie
#300966
******: they say that an oracle dba, having passed all oracle exams and received every oracle certification, can kill a man with a single sql query
#44858
<+UnityDivided> I say to my dad "So apparently Anakin Skywalker becomes Darth Vader."
<+UnityDivided> my dad acts shocked and my mom says "Now why would you say something like that, didn't you just ruin the movie for him?"
<+UnityDivided> my dad and I burst out laughing
Comment: #wpi
#5376
<]RE[-NarcDog> damn thats a hard on...
<]RE[-NarcDog> one*
#16365
<sacarna> i think willingly putting your child in a porno comes under the catergory of unfit parent
#14098
<phunqe> As I was walking home from work the other day, I saw a funny ad in the subway. Instead of laughing quietly for myself I actually said "lol" quite loud. The high voltage tracks seemed very inviting at that point.
#29354
<clay> words with ae looks cool
<clay> they should change them all to that
<clay> masturbaetd
#9616
<@djcrom> she looks like shes about to giggle, then strip naked and wail away at her clit with a hammer in a sweaty, bloody session of demented masturbation
<Insolence> damn that's what my mom looked like when she found a porno in my room
#36421
<AlmtyBob> W00H00
<AlmtyBob> 120 HOURS BITCH
<AlmtyBob> MOTHER FUCK
<AlmtyBob> I JUST TELNETED IN TO MY FUCKING TIVO
<AlmtyBob> DO YOU UNDERSTAND THE SIGNIFICANCE?
<AlmtyBob> THIS IS THE PINNACLE OF MY GEEK LIFE
<AlmtyBob> I'M BLEEDING FROM SEVERAL PARTS OF MY HANDS
<AlmtyBob> MY HOUSE...UTTER DISSARAY
<AlmtyBob> BUT I TELNETED IN TO MY MOTHER FUCKING TIVO
#30523
<Supachikn> square and sony are based in japan
<Supachikn> and heaps of other game devs
<Supachikn> and anime
<Supachikn> and hot chicks
<Supachikn> and rally cars
<Supachikn> and nice motorcycles
<Demigoat> and all night whale-meat buffets!
#55217
<imprfect> So my mum ended up calling me and asked me to come over her.
<imprfect> *Here! HERE! HERE DAMMIT!
#14569
<Baby_Gurl16> Does any one here have a thousand dollars i could borrow to bail my boyfriend out of jail with if so please msg me
#52124
<digitok> Talon: Enable PM
<Talon> one sec
<Talon> done
<digitok> Thanks
<Talon> ok.. why did i do that if your not gonna PM me?
<digitok> I just wanted to see if you're still my bitch
Comment: #spiderslair on Webchat
#301633
<HalfNote5> Have you ever noticed that everyone loves a comedy site right up until it's something important to them that's being satirized or made fun of? "I LOVED it when you made fun of Nazis, the KKK, and the Spanish Inquisition, but I'll have you know, as a Rural American Militia member, I'm insulted that you refer to our 'Justice Dorms' as 'Compounds'. I'll never read your crappy site again!"
#21716
< fluxion> perhaps microsoft has realized that humans cannot accept
perfection, and therefore the software must inherantly be
flawed
#37678
(SherP) damn
(SherP) i just got head
(SherP) :-D
(SabrWolf) that trick with the cat food worked ?
(SherP) ?
(SherP) die
Comment: sherp is a tool
#25616
<Everdraed> We can't grab women's boobs? The terrorists have won!
<Luna`> can't let the terrorists win.
<Everdraed> Exactly Luna
* Everdraed grabs Skyday's boobs
<Skyday> :OP!!!!!!