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#261519
<greenocide> Had to give report over censorship today.
<greenocide> So I put in a pr0n vid and they made me turn it off.
#6369
<Monk> All I have to say... is I'm so messed that when I turned off the blacklight downstairs
<Monk> that I imagined I was defeating a agent of the negaverse sent by queen beryl who was using it to sap our lifeforce
#463
"The cheek of every American must tingle with shame as he reads the silly,
flat, and dishwatery utterances of the man who has to be pointed out to
intelligent foreigners as the President of the United States."
The Chicago Times review of After Lincoln's Gettysburg Address.
#84
<matt> too bad her head looks like an ass
<scv> thats makes blowjobs better, matt
#297618
<@Elleo> we should invent a dance called the Mersenne Twist
<@Elleo> where you just move about randomly
<@Elleo> but with an even distribution
#1261
<JRichman> "Easy" only equals "better" for crack addicts and web developers.
#1473
<isocat> id like to see a good movie about someone nuking the Superbowl
#14475
[Nothingface] fuck, I can't type
[@PMV] its easy
[@PMV] step 1: bang head on keyboard
[@PMV] step 2: repeat
#56538
+PrinceVen : porn spam just doesn't make sense anymore
+PrinceVen : "You always wanted to use your penis as a billard's cue"
#1468
<nexxai> stileproject.com....what a wonderful place
<xsneakerx> yes. place of the bored and horny.
#255470
(+ShinSR71) if i commit suicide i would probably dress up as someone from Naruto to get the show banned
#45116
<sEcretz> One day a teacher went into her classroom and saw the word, “penis” written in small letters on the chalkboard. She erased it and went on with the day's lesson. The next day, she came in and saw the same word on the chalkbaord, but a little bit bigger. She erased it and went on with her lesson.
Each of the next several days, the teacher would come in to find “penis” on the board, a little larger each time.
<sEcretz> She went in one morning, expecting to dinf it again, but instead the chalkboard read: “The more you rub it, the bigger it gets.”
#45431
<Aven> A simple Google search of "My Unit" is good for many laughs.
<Aven> "What do I do if I cannot find my unit?"
<Aven> "My unit broke twice in a year!"
<Aven> "My unit is deploying."
<Aven> "Why is my unit "louder" than an identical model in a friend’s house?"
<Aven> "My unit is making a humming noise. Could it be the compressor?"
<Aven> "My unit is working fine; do I really need to stop using it?"
<Aven> "I suspect that my unit became overheated and now will not run."
<Aven> "Will my unit work in bad weather?"
<Aven> "This is not the exterior of my unit, but it is part of the same development."
<Aven> "What happens if I designate my Unit as public/private?"
#16508
<yesyouam> Never let drugs stand in the way of alcohol
#17890
<[SS]Psyco|PB> The Magic 8-Ball has been ACTIVATED, Type !8ball <question> to use. ×Tracer Script×
<[1CH]Gypsy|Occupied> !8ball will I get high tonight...
<[SS]Psyco|PB> [1CH]Gypsy|Occupied, ( YES!!!!! )
<[1CH]Gypsy|Occupied> FUCKIN' RIGHTS!
<[1CH]Gypsy|Occupied> sweet..
<[1CH]Gypsy|Occupied> at least I can stop worrying..
#307376
<Drakar> I am just so confused
<Drakar> What do I feel
<Drakar> but maybe that's what I want
<Drakar> I want to be confused with her.
<Rahid> I'd advise to wait untill you stabilize.
<Rahid> Cause
<Rahid> Do you know what happens to pokemon when they try to attack while they are in confusion?
<Rahid> They hurt themselves, bro. They hurt themselves
#8271
*** Haggis has quit IRC (Quit: Sometimes I try to masturbate long words into a conversation. Even if I dont know what they mean.)
#304873
<Jake|E5400> There's spaghetti in the southbridge
<Jake|E5400> and steak on my CD
<Jake|E5400> I kid you not
<Jake|E5400> I just dropped a steak on my XP install disk
<~tidux> lol
* Jake|E5400 wipes it off
<ll_TankPad> Windows XP Medium Rare Edition
Comment: #wtfpwnt on irc.rubbermallet.org
#25048
dsfsdf: I need a job
bumlube: you can just whore your sweet ass to the highest bidder.
bumlube: you chicks have it so easy.
dsfsdf: Will you be one of them?
bumlube: fuck no. i'm saving my money for a bitch without syphillis.
#19137
[E-vangelist] I was walking through the mall today and everywhere there are
posters advertising Britney Spears brand ROLLER SKATES everywhere
[E-vangelist] I wonder which pharmecutical company is anxiously awaiting the announcement that her cherry's been popped so they can start selling Britney Brand Birth Control pills
#16125
<DELTRON> Sometimes I wish tomatoes could speak.
#80965
<Eidolon> one time
<Eidolon> someone asked me
<Eidolon> if you traveled back in time
<Eidolon> and masturbated your past self
<Eidolon> is that gay?
<PizzaBoy> now the question is, if you COULD go back in time, would you masturbate yourself? >_>
<PizzaBoy> and the BEST answer to that would be 'Only if my future self already did it to me'
#46292
RecursiveBadger: I had one guy today whos dxdiag report I have saved onto my desktop to cheer me up in the future
Slacker: Do elaborate..
RecursiveBadger: We sent him the generic request for system specs, which is basically "send us your dxdiag report, or at least your Processor, Manufacturer, etc etc"
RecursiveBadger: So he'd taken our email
RecursiveBadger: Printed it
RecursiveBadger: Written beside each point what his system had
RecursiveBadger: Scanned his print-out in
RecursiveBadger: And attached the scans as jpegs
#2912
<IceWizard> What the HELL is up with these candy companies? Little teeny bars are called 'Fun Size'.. Damn, Whats so fun about a smaller candybar?!?
#15422
<loud_as_it_getz> yea well
<@KittenAssassin> .........
<loud_as_it_getz> does n e 1 actually chat on mirc??
<@KittenAssassin> no
<Simwolf> nope
<@KittenAssassin> we chat on IRC
<Simwolf> no one at all
<@KittenAssassin> you must be in the wrong place
<Simwolf> absolutely not a FUCKING soul
<loud_as_it_getz> wich is?
<@KittenAssassin> just type /s IRC
<@KittenAssassin> and you will be re directed to IRC
*** Quits: loud_as_it_getz (mary@210.50.66.28738) (Need more parameters)