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#34302
<TheGreatDrunkMonkey> It's like a book report from Hell
<Mayseth> Sounds like alot of writing, I'll get you started.
<Mayseth> Page 1: It was short, and boring. Losing interest to read book.
<Mayseth> page 2: Still boring. I fell asleep. Will continue in the morning.
<Mayseth> Page 2.5: God this book sucks.
<Mayseth> Page 3: I downloaded the rest of this report off the internet. Enjoy.
#35140
<_Sarah_> sorry, had a little visitor in a red sleeper show up
<Jason> is that code for your period?
<_Sarah_> LOL!
<Jason> ive bought tampons before, i know all about them
<_Sarah_> no.. it was my son, he got out of bed.. heh
#9501
<AgentSmith> It seems you have been leading two lives, Mr. Anderson. In one life, you are Robert Anderson, assistant cook at a Jack in the Box in Mesquite....in the other...you go by the chat alias "Randerson"...spreading homosexual propoganda, lying, and being a generally immature pest...
<AgentSmith> One of these...has a future.
<Randerson> LMAO OMFG where's the phone, I have to tell Dean about this
<AgentSmith> How can you use the phone when you cannot...speak?
*** AgentSmith sets mode: +m
#29400
<oreo> If you drink, don't park. Accidents cause people.
#8506
<aversion> i was takin a dump today in the stalls
<aversion> and someone stuck their dick through a hole
<aversion> i didnt even get to finish
#57089
Biffa: ..I said "Do you love mummy?" She said yes. I said "Do you love daddy?" She said yes. I said "Do you love me?" She said yes. I thought "aaah bless, how sweet". I was so happy. But I wasn't sure if she meant it, so as a test I said "Do you love Hitler?" She said yes. I thought "Bugger, she'll say yes to anything." But I felt better when I took her home, she showed me her bedroom and it was covered with pictures of Hitler.
#10958
(morganj): 0 is false and 1 is true, correct?
(alec_eso): 1, morganj
(morganj): bastard.
#37843
<TrafficCone> Me: "So would you sleep with me for a milion bucks?"
<TrafficCone> Her: "I guess. Thats a lota money."
<TrafficCone> Me: "How about 50 bucks?"
<TrafficCone> Her: "What do you think I am, a filthy whore?"
<TrafficCone> Me: "Well we know what you are, now we're just negotiating the price."
<TrafficCone> Earned me a slap, but it seemed like a good idea at the time, and I stand by that decision.
#44534
<+^Sheldon> I was in the IT industry 20 years, and I still can't explain why a simple restart solves all problems :p
#3723
<FreshBrew> if i ever get arrested for something serious, 20/20 and Dateline are going to have a field day with my irc logs.
#29447
(+emil) hahahahahahshsahhahshahhhhhash
(@Spellbinder) hash?
(+emil) what?
(+emil) oh
(+emil) i have fat fingers
(+emil) so when i laugh on irc
(+emil) i press the s button too
#49946
<Brianetta> This is why I like open source (:
<Brianetta> It's like the manual, only more detailed and with less pictures.
#231855
<sara> FUCK I THINK I BURNED
<sara> WELCOME TO FACEBOOK
<sara> INTO MY SCREEN
#310229
< wushin> your art is very good
< bagzie> I hate it more and more each day
< wushin> that just means you're an artist
#7755
<psIRE> I had sex once, very tiring
<Mulder> lol
<Snipe> yeh me too.... oh wait no that was the time i installed linux
#83243
<Grey> Programming languages are like Pokemon moves; you can only really know like four of them at once without having to forget about another one
#33223
<g6|agbd|kma> sure, he's innocent on all charges, didn't you know that?
<g6|agbd|kma> I mean, the httpd logs show him logging as phpbb admin
<g6|agbd|kma> then backing up the forums
<g6|agbd|kma> then douching them, all from his ip
<g6|agbd|kma> so it MUST HAVE BEEN SOMEONE ELSE
#308469
<hagbard> i3Guest88: the pin9 that on the webpage is marked "NC" what are you doing with that pin?
<i3Guest88> just to ground
<myself> aha
<myself> when a bit gets shifted off the edge of the '595, it falls out pin 9
<myself> if you're pushing zeroes out there, the chip is trying to drive pin 9 to ground, which is already its state, and everything is copascetic
<myself> but as soon as you shift a 1 off the edge of the register, it tries to drive pin 9 high, but it's grounded, so it shorts your power supply
<myself> when a pin is labeled NC, that means you only connect it if you're in North Carolina
<myself> and since we're in Michigan, we use that as a no-connect pin, meaning leave it floating
#300771
[Marcus] : So I'm filling out an injury report for one of our stunt men...
[Greta] : Oh no what happened?
[Marcus] : He busted his nose in a stunt no big deal it happens. But the answers for the questions on the forms...
[Marcus] : How did the employee injure himself: his head was getting pushed into a toilet.
[Marcus] : Would this be a common work place injury: yes
[Marcus] : Statement made by employee: it's ok john, next week I get to hit you with a car
#7940
<videogamenerd> a real hacker not a "$kr!p7!3"
<kt> videogamenerd: your geek is showing
#46200
<kryptech> I saw this hot girl who wore this sweater that said in big white letters "RFC"
<kryptech> too bad, I couldnt concentrate on her hotness
<kryptech> all I could think about was protocol standardizations
#45629
RuKK0R: you know.. I was just looking at the official list of the most shoplifted items in the good ol US of A
RuKK0R: 1) painkillers
2) home pregnancy tests
3) razor blades
4) preperation H
5) baby food
6) condoms
RuKK0R: the first thing I had to wonder, upon looking over this list..
RuKK0R: if condoms had been higher on the list, would have baby food and pregnancy tests been lower?
jmlsteele: what I'm wondering is why is preperation H on the list.
jmlsteele: the rest "make sense"
jmlsteele: suicide, teen pregnancy, suicide, ????, teen pregnancy, to avoid teen pregnancy
jmlsteele: how in the hell does preperation H fit into that?!
#15594
<Nani-chan> hey folks, can we keep it semi clean right now? my parents might be watching and i dont wanna get in trouble
<Nani-chan> crack: 14 y.o girl, you dumbass cockless bitch
<RikisuuDelta> quite hypocritical if you ask me
#8396
<kipozo> motardo: Lindows is installing from my D:\ but it's looking under my A:\.... looks like windows too much already
#305949
<@Profane> my right hand aches
<@Profane> from using the touchpad for hours
<@Profane> >:(
<@Profane> stupid fiddly powerpoint
<@Riocaz> Yea "touchpad"...
<+goat> "powerpoint"