Random | Latest | Best | Full Site
#40669
<Mookeh> Pf, I'm taking head from a guy who duct taped himself to a ceiling trying to replace a light bulb
<jez> wtf
<Oranz> WTF
<Mookeh> OMG, worst typo ever! I meant HEAT!
#9587
<Lloyddy> Can anyone tell me what sex feels like? My friend wants to know
#294592
(@Zigkirby) I mean, could you explain it to me?
(@Polly) I could but I feel I'd be wasting valuable typing energy. I can only type so many characters per day and when I start getting close to the limit i hv to strt lving out lttrs so i dn rn out
(@Jaq) You're having irregular vowel movements
(@Jaq) Perhaps you've caught what I have
#10261
<mindran> ok i'm going to be fired
<mindran> i made some thing generate random passwords for this app i just made
<mindran> and sent it out
<mindran> and some of them are horrible :(
<mindran> i dont want to be the person who's password is now "hard14long"
<mindran> or "like10come"
#302675
<^[> if i get a new machine i've got everything else planned out for my old parts
<^[> the old desktop turns into a render box
<^[> the old render box turns into a fileserver
<^[> the old fileserver turns into a flowerpot
<^[> and the old flowerpot goes outside because i haven't watered it in like 9 months and the plants have been long dead
#4015
<aeflux> I swear 85% of the CS community failed remedial english in 3rd grade
<Gunny> 85% of the CS community hasn't made it to the 3rd grade
#12026
<n_> derf if you ever call me on the phone and ask for ops again
<derF> heh.. i'm lazy
#7908
<@dum|work> he's actually quite likeable in RL
<@dum|work> its just when he gets behind an irc session he becomes Bitter-man
<@dum|work> a strange visitor from another planet, zapping the denizens of IRC with his Bittero rays
<@acme> he's got a Bitter-man cape and tights and everything
<@dum|work> the tights are just a recreational thing
#53737
leet42: someone at the fortune cookie company has a sense of humor
leet42: "the fortune you seek is in another cookie"
#25111
<Tracer> i recently had a to punish an engineer at work because the video camera's in the main assembly hangar caught him wacking off in the cockpit of a F-16..
#6491
<SwampFox> "I'm sleeping with several local teens. Find out if your child is one of them at 11."
#2937
<exbawx> $465 in debt. good luck to me.
<novocain> its yer own damn fault that 1. you work at taco bell 2. that you only work 4 hours a week
#309708
* Mich is now known as mich
<TB> Little mich
<TB> I don't understand the need to change from M to m
<Tibby> he ran into a goomba
#3752
<ChewToy> hrm... my girlfriend should be getting off work soon
<ChewToy> i should get really really stoned before she gets here
<spazzer> actually
<spazzer> chew
<spazzer> i got off your girlfriend this afternoon first
<ChewToy> spazzer she's fucking hot :)
<ChewToy> she puts out!
<spazzer> hence, i said i got off of her first
<ChewToy> she sucks good dick doesnt she?
<spazzer> i was getting close, and she told me to put my finger in her ass
<ChewToy> she's a manager at a victorias secret
<ChewToy> :>
* KNG_SNK wonders how chew scored that
<dazemobil> he ordered her in the catalog =o
#7819
<kt> collars are still ugly on people.
<Adri784> What if you're roleplaying?
<kt> then you'll be an ugly roleplayer.
* Adri784 thinks about that
<Adri784> I guess i'll keep that in mind if i ever enter a sex slave relationship
#204
(|Chris) i felt boobies tonight!
(McMoo) did they belong to a womang?
#302071
<rigeld2> Just got a workorder with a list of domains who supposedly blacklist us. Our domain is on that list. I wonder when we started blacklisting ourselves.
* rigeld2 stabs stupid people
<inode0> I would do it if I had the power
<inode0> I could improve the lives of 60,000 people just like that
#6419
<extremist> strep?
<extremist> that thing where girls take their clothes off?
#779
<zaney> whats gaotse.cs url
<zaney> correct 1
#46473
*** X___ has joined #invest
<X___> omg! i got these hot pics of my older sister nude last night!
<br0ker> This is #invest...
<br0ker> "C" and "V" are adjacent.
#185752
CRKD_rat: every time i hear the word joygasm, i think of a man cumming a rainbow.
#38614
<Punani> Of course IRC seems to be a veritable pond for some of the dumbest quotes on earth.
#76
<MTrez> ok, about 1 million of my potential children just got introduced to some downy tissue, so im gonna sleep now, im tired
#256707
His Madjesty: So the water cooler at work is broken. It still works, but it leaks.
Ideasman: that's not good...
His Madjesty: We tried to get someone in to fix it or replace it, but they just said to take the water bottle out when we're not using it.
Ideasman: WTF? where are you working?
His Madjesty: Microsoft.
#30507
<qbix003> I wanna buy one of those $100 pads
<qbix003> so they don't slide around
<Xylene> qbix003
<Xylene> you can get some $5 pads here
<Xylene> http://www.stayfree.com/
Comment: irc.cheatlist.com #dcemu