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#8127
<Szyslak> HAHAHAHA those wacky spanish: "Our download server can only support 300 simultaneous discharges"
#40015
<mike[F]> Dad (drunk): I used to be a porn star in college to pay the bills, thats how I met your mom!
<mike[F]> Me: Are you shitting me?
<mike[F]> Dad: Nah, I'm just fuckin with ya. She was the porn star. I just stumbled into the wrong dorm room and got my cock sucked.
Comment: #i_r_teh_h4x on irc.gamesurge.net
#311122
<Kit> Is anyone around who has my nude pics who can forward them to someone?
#43467
<popeye> rolloffle do you eat meat
<rolloffle> of course I do
<popeye> if you do then you murder
<rolloffle> you think I'm some kind of fag or something?
<popeye> well you are from europe
<popeye> so how does it feel to be a murderer
<rolloffle> pretty tasty.
Comment: #gnaa irc.gnaa.us
#667
<Chis> anyone experienced with shavers?
<Chis> i need to get one on ebay)
<Chis> http://search.ebay.com/search/search.dll?MfcISAPICommand=GetResult&ht=1&SortProperty=MetaEndSort&query=electric+shaver
<Spidey> dude
<Spidey> just go to the damn store
#1765
<skunko> my standards for chicks right now are super low
<skunko> i'd go out with a chick as long as she wasnt fat, was shorter than me, and was going to get me off in some fashion
#102644
<Steven> working on a CrissCross bug
<Steven> and I had no ability to scroll up for some reason, so I was going to use 'less' to read it. I usually pipe the results into a file first, so I did
<Steven> make check > poop
<Steven> using poop as a temp name
<Steven> the funniest part was using the command
<Steven> 'cat poop'
<Miah> D:
* Miah scoops it up
<Miah> I had JUST cleaned this fucking harddrive
#45715
<Tigger> It is raining
* Tigger cups her hands together around her mouth
<Tigger> Hello! anyone home?
* Phoon finishes peeing off the balcony
#8238
* sabeel (~blackHoru@62.61.192.142) has joined #winprog
* delete[] sets mode: +v sabeel
<+sabeel> is google working ...?
<+O_6> !google sabeel is retarded
<+logiclrd> O_6: http://www.prairienet.org/cpt/archives/2000/oct00/0006.html
<+O_6> ^^
...
<+sabeel> !google O_6 is also retarded
<+logiclrd> sabeel: Sorry, the server did not return expected response headers. This probably means that there were no matches to your query.
<@violus> huhuh
<+O_6> sabeel, touche, retard
<@violus> owned.
#3186
(Sarojin) Haha nice, I got referred to the Jews for the Preservation of Firearms Ownership by askjeeves.com, and the banner on the top said across it "WHY PAY RETAIL!?"
#1825
<madthink> what does putting sugar in someones gas tank do
<maff> I heard when you start the engine cinnamon rolls come out
<maff> with frosting and everything
<madthink> i need to get revenge in the worst way
<maff> cinnamon rolls arent really revenge
#13151
[ @niffie ] I have no inhabitions right now
[ @aphr0 ] would you finger my asshole?
[ @niffie ] no
[ @aphr0 ] then you have inhibitions
#9399
<Ragnarok> i kinda like that
<Ragnarok> i dig the natural look
<haole> then you'll be quite pleased with her crotch afro
<haole> it looks like a 70s blaxploitation extra
#115317
<Zemyla> Did I tell you about what my friend Joe did in auto shop?
<Zemyla> He was working with an arc welder, and the welder tip got stuck to the metal.
<Zemyla> He knew this was a bad thing, so he grabs a hammer and hits the metal to get the tip off.
<Zemyla> Then when he pulls back, lightning arcs from the metal to the hammer.
<Zemyla> The teacher notices this, and yells, "WHAT ARE YOU DOING?"
<Zemyla> And Joe bellows, "I AM THOR!", brandishes the hammer, and shocks the fuck out of the guy next to him.
Comment: #cmc on Nightstar
#1352
<CyberThor> HIDE THE SHIT, SHARKEY'S HERE!
* Silkenray throws a blanket over Thor
* CyberThor is soothed by the calming, womb-like combination of warm and dark
#31111
<efeX> I got an email off a clan leader today
<efeX> He offered me a "nap"
<efeX> with his "division"
<efeX> So im guessing im invited to some sort of nerd orgy
<efeX> Which quite frankly both fightens and excites me
<efeX> infact, bbl
#6737
<dav^> uncola: man im in big fuckin trouble
<dav^> uncola: help
<uncola> dav^: what did you do?
<dav^> i haxed my schools web page and i accidentally used my friends login/pass
<dav^> and they fucking looked at the log, bastards
<uncola> haha
#29803
<TiTaN> "If it smells like cheap cologne don't touch it.
<TiTaN> " - |darc|
<|darc|> Yup.
<TiTaN> wtf does that mean >_>
<|darc|> She might be a whore.
<|darc|> There's an ancient word passed down from generation to generation. It goes something like this: If it smells like fish, eat as you wish; if it smells like cologne, leave it alone.
<Kenichi> If someone is gay, stick your hardened penis up their asshole and make love with them.
<Kenichi> - Kenichi
Comment: #dcemu
#298741
* Damian likes girls that drink beer and code and are really guys
#30447
<Scoth> Olyndar: You coughed on her? How rude
<Olyndar> She liked it.
<Olyndar> She's kinky like that.
* lemming chuckles
<lemming> hmm
<Olyndar> FEEL THE GERMS INVADING YOUR BODY LIKE SO MANY TINY PENISES!
#31494
<Meph|st0> Complaint : BOUGTH IT FOR MY COUSIN WHO HAD CANCER, ITEM NEVER ARRIVED AND MY COUSIN DIED
<Meph|st0> thats the greatest ebay feedback i have ever seen
#310171
<kmc> I like telling people who've only used high level languages about the bizarre forms of undefined behavior in C, and then ending it with "this language and its relatives are used for most systems in planes, cars, medical devices, nuclear reactors, etc."
#21792
* Rancid likes those hot teachers who keep you back after school for a private lesson
* Rancid has never had one of those
* Rancid watches to much TV
#16842
<limeking> Hey jen, ya wanna come over and we can wrap ourseves in plastic, shit ourselvves, and then eat our own shit while listening to MC hammer?
<Jennie254> Ewwwww gross!
<Jennie254> That's fucked up! Why would you even THINK I'd want to listen to MC Hammer?? .
#7610
<shadok> bo gritz shot himself and only inflicted a flesh wound
<shadok> the quality of american fascism has declined notably in recent times
<shadok> i blame flouride