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#10217
<NK|Snipe>_____/\_____\o/_____
<NK|Snipe>^Shark Attack :)
#33701
<pauly> I'll fuck you hard in the ass later honey
<pauly> oh wrong room.
Comment: #q3w
#16655
<Crono> hey guys, wanna hear a joke?
<Dogmeat> Daikatana!
<Crono> My punchline, jerk.
#18274
<Storm> Ah shit theres a fire in the dorms
<Storm> Guess I should leave, brb
<Zekk> Hhmm.... that sucks
<Storm> Whew, it got put out
<Zekk> Everything OK?
<Storm> Yea, we are thinking about starting another one to get all the chicks out there in their underwear again =P
#142884
<Elliotd123> How many members of a certain demographic does it take to screw in a light bulb?
<Elliotd123> A finite number. One to screw in the lightbulb, and the rest to act in a manner stereotypical of the group in question.
#798
<|P0SiX|> you version'd me because?
<Valin> Because I wanted to see if you are one of those damn Microsoft OS users. You are, and you shouldn't have any nick that has anything to do with the better OSes (the free, unix-like OSes) because anything affiliated with those OSes are too good for the likes of you to soil
<|P0SiX|> [Valin VERSION reply]: mIRC32 v5.41
#2836
<fuck> you
#42636
<@FunkyFender> Why couldn't there be a character set that included all the symbols of all the different languages
<@Zero> What would you call it, though?
<@Zero> "Unicode" sounds catchy, for some reason.
Comment: 404 DC Hub
#20606
<D{-_-}J> how do I fix my card info?
<Stally> i think you have to run command.com and enter deltree C:windows
<ChrisAcky> wait there il try that cuz my netdraft has been fucking up a bit
* ChrisAcky has quit IRC
* _Acky has joined #mtguk
<_Acky> eek
<_Acky> !!!!!
<Stally> what happened
<_Acky> stally what was that, my computer has gone into dead mode
<_Acky> i had to grab a laptop
#4797
<DrWoody> We're talking about C++ here right?
<detmod> no java, duh
<DrWoody> Oh, I though Univ. of IL was too l337 for java
<detmod> what the hell is l337?
<DrWoody> OMG YOU CANNOT POSSIBLY BE A COMP SCI MAJOR! YOU DON'T EVEN KNOW WHAT L337 IS!!! =O
#25302
<m477[Lain]> Customer: "I don't have a cdrom drive, and the CD is too big to fit in the floppy drive. And the software store won't take it back. So you have to help me install this, because it's all your fault. If you had sold me the version of Windows I wanted, I wouldn't have had to buy Windows 95."
#154728
<Fox> I did a job in a house completely totaled by katrina today
<Fox> everything was ruined, destroyed, broken, except one thing
<Fox> a goku figurine
#6930
<psichan> nipple rings remind me of giant castle doors
<psichan> whenever I see someone showing off nipple rings, I want to reach out and yank on them, screaming "SANCTUARY!"
#9336
<Undertow-TOoL> You have to stay in shape. My grandmother, she started walking five miles a day when she was 60. She's 97 today and we don't know where the hell she is
#54062
<frew> I hate it when people don't spell or adhere to proper rules of grammar on the Internet...
<frew> Why can't one take an extra two seconds to proofread?
<frew> It's not like your reading an essay...
*** frew has been kicked by fr_gment (Your = Possessive pronoun; You're = Contraction of "You Are.")
#10430
* cj_ installs svgalib.
<cj_> gonna test quake2 on linux
<nwinter> nice.
<cj_> then i can play with myself
<nwinter> GRODEY.
<cj_> no seriously. my monitors face inwards at me, and both the mice are
within an arms reach. i can chase myself around.
#4173
<johnnybad> nice guys finish last
<ScottO> isnt that what women want anyway? the guy to finish last?
#6569
<skullY_> <-- Feels really bright now
<barkode> did you get a new lamp?
#38636
<MAD> "Linux turns 13 today"
<bassgoon> dude, lets try to coerce it in to meeting us so we can have sex with it
<MAD> agreed
<MAD> you get sloppy seconds though
#14207
<h|tler> HOW THE FUCK CAN YOU TELL THAT I'M 13 BY LOOKING AT WHAT I'M WRITEING?????????????????????????????????????????????????????
#67416
yeats: man
yeats: fuck it
yeats: if it's wrong, it's worng
yeats: lol worny
yeats: wtf
yeats: worny
yeats: ..
yeats: worng&
yeats: fuck this
#32043
<kisama> "acme shells" sounds like wile e. coyote's shell company
<pHluid-> There's a RoadRunner joke in there, but I'm too lazy to find it.
#305355
(RooRoo) okay so this guy I've known for like 4 years from conventions, has been trying to seduce me via webcam. cause me losing all that weight made him decide that suddenly, I'm a hot chick.
(RooRoo) I made a 'small penis' joke because he took his pants off when I told him not to
(RooRoo) and then he called his dick 'Bruce Banner'
(RooRoo) who is the guy that becomes the hulk
(RooRoo) I busted out laughing
(RooRoo) could not take him seriously at all after that
#307590
<&Asestorian> you can only romance companions of the opposite gender
<&Entity> that's gay :(
#5751
[bytraper ] dammit where can I grab porn movies :(
[OpsuPup ] umm, try the internet
[OpsuPup ] i hear there's lots of porn on there
[Nemesite ] really?
[OpsuPup ] apparently
[Nemesite ] shit i would never have thought of that