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#35344
<Rjx> we should spread the myth that having sex with someone who writes in altcaps makes your penis drop off
Comment: #geekissues
#144982
<dogan> yeah I saw a guy dressed as Cats at a costume party once
<dogan> didn't know what to say to him
<zuu> how about "it's you."
#51077
(@yt): i need something that symbolises my alter-ego. Bowler hat, briefcase, umberella, monacle
(@yt): etc
(rocksicle): your alter-ego is the penguin?
#30539
<stu> if i could sell feet odour, i'd be rich
<jonathans> and alone
Comment: #lost
#29301
<Dilbert|AFK> my homopage is www.fark.com
<Dilbert|AFK> ...
<Dilbert|AFK> and thats my homepage too
Comment: irc.cheatlist.com #dcemu
#25586
<@kronz> dot <--
<@kronz> wait no
<@kronz> . <-- dot
#279182
<flameblade> when it comes to ground speed, humans are the ultimate tortoise to nearly every other animal's hare
<celti> ...yeah.
<celti> I'd like to see you design a bicycle for a rabbit, though.
#29378
<Pheonyx> i wish there was an 'opinion-blocker'
<Pheonyx> like a 'spam-blocker'
<Pheonyx> but blocked everyone else opinion from irc
<Pheonyx> cuz if i cared, id ask
<ssrbrando> oooooo
<ssrbrando> if he cared he'd ask
<Pheonyx> thats right
<ssrbrando> everything centers around pheonyx
<Pheonyx> no
<Pheonyx> it doesnt
<Redzzz> and bitching about stuff you cant change is like.. anybody in this channel having sex
Comment: #altrock @ efnet
#11606
<DeathRay> My car can fly thanks to the power of lies!
#10726
<FuriousG> shan|bbl
<FuriousG> you there?
<FuriousG> guess not
<FuriousG> but, one day, you will be there, and then, then... you will be at my mercy, and i will not be benevolent
<FuriousG> *sigh*
<FuriousG> i need to get out more.
#301089
<cmihai> eval 1/1
<evaluator491756> cmihai: 1
<flyingparchment> eval `uname`
<evaluator491756> flyingparchment: AIX
*** [Signoff: evaluator491756 (Remote closed the connection)]
<Tempt> you killed it before I could have fun
<cmihai> This is the first bot I wrote, mkey? :P
<e^ipi> massivesecurityholebot 0.1 ?
#307812
<ninja_warrior666> can anyone tell me how to create sodium metal?
<ninja_warrior666> or nitrocellulose?
<Schroedingers_hat> Well, it all starts with an infinitely hot singularity...
<ninja_warrior666> ...
<Schroedingers_hat> But you've gotta create some nothing first.
<Schroedingers_hat> Well, not first
<Schroedingers_hat> because you haven't created time yet.
<Schroedingers_hat> Well not yet
<Schroedingers_hat> but you get what I mean
#33211
<ducklord> I'm having pink "waves" flowing over my screen at all times
<ducklord> anyone knows wtf is up with that?
<kitchen> too much acid?
Comment: #GeekIssues on EFNet
#300852
<ranc0r> IT Rule: When Symantec buys a product, it goes to shit.
#303787
<femmefan1946> Those drivers have tight schedules to follow. You'd have a hard time flagging one down.
<femmefan1946> Unless you were wearing a low-cut dress.
<Mango> Heh. I'm male. Though this is Vancouver...it would probably be fairly easy to flag a driver down, if I was wearing a low-cut dress.
<Mango> It works for my uncle.
#50267
<Klassh> strange, my left hand is warm, but my right hand is cold..
<killjoy> take left hand out of pants.
<killjoy> put right hand in pants.
#38466
<SquareRoot> I know this is very OT, but I come here a bit so I thought I could try asking here... I found my sister's goldfish on the floor about a minute ago (although I have no idea how long it's been there... it was dry though) ... it appears that it jumped out of the bowl... upon reinserting it it proceeded to just float there... is there anything I can do?
#5971
<Pseudonym> I got my mom addicted to GTA3 by accident ><
#55277
<@r0ger> i'm looking at the michigan sex offenders list
<@r0ger> and i already found 6 people i know
<@r0ger> 2 of them i work/worked with
<@ne0n> haha
<@shadow> LOL
<@shadow> nice
<@gHoTi> its cheatin to include yourself in people you have worked with ;)
<@shadow> rofl
Comment: #m1k3y
#13370
<HuStLe> Today I was was flirting with this hot girl in the halls after school but once again my computer screwed me over
<Netminder> How so?
<HuStLe> Well I was gettin far with her, then she me a secret about her and her ex, I went to laugh, but guess what came out.
<HuStLe> Me - "Laugh out Loud", I actually said laugh out loud. :(
#38110
02:14 MrDictionary: My new laptoppy 802.11g wireless card is ace
02:15 Tully: that came already? phew! lucky bastard
02:15 MrDictionary: 75kbs upload to my FTP! EAT THAT!
02:16 Tully: You suck.
02:16 Jamers0n: You lucky fuck.
02:17 Tully: Betya can't shake the laptop about while uploading
02:17 MrDictionary: Just freaking watch me
* MrDicitonary has quit IRC (Ping timeout - Server time 02:18)
02:18 Jamers0n: lol
02:19 * Tully cracks knuckles
#3781
<@sh0x> in a free society, if you're making your animal happy, why should it be illegal
#4971
<joey`> clay...doy you know anything about networking
<clay> yes
<clay> the rj45 pee pee goes into the nic pee pee, joey
#8210
<vino> when we first got our chickens
<vino> we got all these differant ones
<vino> and some of them fighted
<vino> and no jokes
<vino> one of them
<vino> bashed the fuck out of another one
<vino> and did a victory dance
<nim-zero> serious man
<nim-zero> go to narcotics anonymous
#2998
<dboo> shit...i can hear the cat masturbating again