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#206512
<zaapiel> mplayer palestinian_girls_go_jihad_on_jewish_cock.avi
<zaapiel> doh wrong term
#7679
<[BoB]spencer> LOL who has seen the capture the sperm game?
<Sharp|DoD> i play it every day with my sock
<Sharp|DoD> woops
#37565
(@greeneking) I started my job today...
(@greeneking) It's so easy, lol
(@greeneking) 8 hour shifts
(@greeneking) and all i do is get books off shelves and put them onto boxes
(@greeneking) the most fun part is pushing a box down one of them roller belt thingys
(@greeneking) i should shit in one
Comment: genuine typo....
#310960
< wushin> Well then you should also know that's considered a stereotype.
< o11c> You know what they say about stereotypes.
< gumi> What do they say?
< o11c> They're twice as big as monotypes.
#7118
<HowLeTT> if my back seat smells like pussy tomorrow, im going to be furious
<HowLeTT> seriously
#3110
<putnam> this chinese kid said something so damn funny today on the phone
<putnam> let me give you the exact quote that he said, i will make sure not to make any typos. just picture hearing a chinese thug say this
<putnam> i said "man i'm gonna kick your ass" and he responds with:
<putnam> oh fuck nah...i'm gonna get some brick, and throw it across your window. i'm gonna throw it across your window and burn your bushes.
#1605
<tgpretend> MICROSOFT BRAIN DRAIN CONTINUES. Fourteen-year
<tgpretend> vet. Paul Maritz resigns.
<tgpretend> how can he be an m$ veterna if he's only 14?
#29436
<ryano> grape juice + vodka > red wine
#39079
<@Wegs> SHOW YOUR VOTE 2004
<@Wegs> IF you support John Howard for Prime Minister, please drive during the DAY with your headlights ON.
<@Wegs> IF you support Mark Latham for Prime Minister, please drive at NIGHT with your headlights OFF.
<@Wegs> Thank you for your participation!
#7039
<DocWebstr> *cough*BULLSHIT*cough*
<Lazarus> Doc, you really gotta quit inhaling all that bullshit; it's not good for you.
#56772
<Serena[T]> hey Catcher, how's it going?
<Catcher> not much Serena[T], about to go on a little date
<Catcher> well, kind of
<Catcher> our night kind of got blown to bits
<Catcher> so we're skipping the dinner, and skipping the movie we planned
<Catcher> and we're just going straight to the hotel room :P
<jonathans> hot
<jonathans> what breed is she
Comment: efnet #geekissues
#23510
<woodss> omg
<woodss> one of our sales team sent a request for proposal to a school yesterday... he got a reply today, with all of the spelling and grammar corrections made for him.. LMAO
<Carlo> Hahaha
<woodss> there was a big red ring around one paragraph...!!
<Carlo> That's great
<woodss> I guess we didn't get the work... lol
<Carlo> Heh, one would think not
<lech> suprised you even got a response at all...
#38705
* chupachipmunk touches his heart... area
* TallestSilver tries to touch her heart area, but smacks her boob instead
<TallestSilver> Ow....
<chupachipmunk> Hah
* chupachipmunk can touch his chest without hitting boob
<TallestSilver> FUCKIN' BOOBS! I'LL TEACH YOU TO GET IN MY WAY!!!!!!
* TallestSilver slices off her breasts with a rusty dagger and tosses them away
* chupachipmunk hand Silver some hydrogen peroxide
<Lucifer> yknow, that reminds me of something...
<Lucifer> you've all heard of the Amazons, right?
<chupachipmunk> They are the ancient all-female race who patented one click shopping
#297048
<+August> speaking of which, mom yelled at me the other day for not having a flying carpet in WoW.
<+August> i was like mom, my tailoring isn't high enough.
<+August> she was like "well get on it!"
#3634
<tyne> my life consists of 2 things
<tyne> music
<tyne> and debt
#26253
(Griff) dalnet has a small man who visits each user's home in turn,. he is like santa, but he is the nickname man
(Griff) if you have been a good boy or girl he will let you register your nick
(Griff) if you have been bad he will make you Guest34535
(Griff) he's St. NickServ
#226816
craig: If Not Me Is Nothing Then Visible = True
craig: my code is getting existential
chagster: thats awful
craig: i hope it's not having a GenericIdentity crisis =\
#162955
<@Faustus> The combination of a barbiturate induction agent and a nondepolarizing paralytic agent is used in thousands of anaesthetics every day. Supporters of the death penalty argue that unless anesthesiologists have been wrong for the last 40 years, the use of pentothal and pancuronium is safe and effective
<@Faustus> how the fuck is lethal injection safe?
#670
<Johnno> wouldnt it be cool if there was a cow that had a door on it's side, that when you opened it up, it produced nummmy pie
<wonko> that's a good idea! hold on while I round up some venture capital...
#1114
<@Spidey|> http://www.facethejury.com/profile.asp?user_name=coralshay
<@D1> OMG! MOM?
#16194
<Read^Tired>: u just like sucking ur own dick
<Rayor>: is it that obvious?
#35875
<mog> oops
<mog> in jeopardy, it was like crossword clues D
<mog> or something
<ocean2> what on earth are you talking about
<mog> it was "This anonymous source helped to bring down the Nixon Administration"
<mog> it was deep throat
<mog> but I yelled out Blow Job accidentally
<mog> in front of my mom and sister
<mog> :/
<mog> my mom kicked me off the couch, haha
#311003
<manderson> I decided to surprise visit my mom for thanksgiving.
<manderson> She answered the door and asked, "can I help you?" and looked confused.
<asterick> hah
<manderson> Yeah, then it all went downhill.
<manderson> It took less than 5 minutes before she asked me to fix her computer.
<manderson> You haven't seen me in two years and *that* is what you want?
#32198
RyanIsL33T: HAHAAH
RyanIsL33T: HALF TIME SHOW
RyanIsL33T: JANET JACKSONS BOOB FELL OUT
SpAz0Licious: WHAT
SpAz0Licious: BULLSHIT
SpAz0Licious: WHEN
RyanIsL33T: AT THE END OF THE SHOW
SpAz0Licious: DID YOU GET A PIC?
RyanIsL33T: NO
SpAz0Licious: DAMNIT
SpAz0Licious: its gonna be all over the net in like 10 minutes anyway
RyanIsL33T: yeah
10 minutes later:
SpAz0Licious: http://66.98.142.98/~volume/janet/JANETSBOOB.jpg
SpAz0Licious: HAHAHA
SpAz0Licious: I TOLD YOU 10 MINUTES
RyanIsL33T: ROFL
#12768
<eltawater> anyone know the name of a (mathematical) function which calculates how many times a number M fits into a number N?
<eltawater> i.e. 20,4 = 5
<eltawater> ?
<Biddle> Division?
<AlleyCat> divisor
<eltawater> er
<eltawater> *smacks head into desk*