Random | Latest | Best | Full Site
#16374
(debaser) i bought a mouse today
(debaser) and it didnt have a ball in it
(debaser) i got a neutered mouse.
#5020
<iban> when i was your age all i had was a mac, and photoshop
<iban> if i wanted an online gf i had to draw her
#44942
<[sync]> Windows Services for Unix destroyed my windows installation
<[sync]> Microsoft: this is what you get, traitor
#19342
<NonSequitur> Cthulhu tweaking his nip.
<SemiSquared> Jarp, women don't have boxes.
<Jarp> ...
<SemiSquared> Er wait...
<SemiSquared> That's packages.
<NonSequitur> rofl
<SemiSquared> Nevermind.
#244791
<TerrorBite> Parse error: parse error, unexpected spanish inquisition in /var/www/index.php on line 51
<NotoriousOIT> bwaha
<kazin> I'm sure the author wasn't expecting that.
#303792
<emFox> Kali ma!
* emFox rips Novu's still-beating heart out of his chest and lowers his body into a flame pit.
<emFox> Bali Mangthi Kali Ma!
<Novu_Ferret> This is how I know he loves me
#1454
<Thes2K> OK, PLEASE DO NOT TAKE THIS OUT OF CONTEXT, BUT DOES ANYONE KNOW WHERE I CAN FIND PICTURE OF NAKED BLACK MALES?
#61040
<Trinexx> Ahhhh, nothing like putting on a fresh pair of boxers :)
<Apollo> bleh, boxers
<Apollo> because having my dick wiggle its way out of my pants is so much fun. i prefer briefs
<Trinexx> yeah, because having your balls shoved up into your asshole is so much better
#43885
<Ravenclaw> i want to sew "bad mother fucker" onto my wallet somehow
<Meo`> you should probably have someone else sew it
<Meo`> bad motherfuckers dont sew
#37314
<Redd_Jedi> When people say "Have you been penetrated" does that mean have they been shot?
<Plog> o_O
<Squirtle> O_O
<Redd_Jedi> What?
<Plog> Redd_Jedi: When you have a man and a woman.
<Redd_Jedi> WHOA WHOA WHOA I DONT LIKE WHERE THIS IS GOING
<Plog> they order a bird to drop a baby down their chimney.
<Plog> And the baby is penetrating the chimney you see. >_>
<Redd_Jedi> So that's what it means <_<
#14711
<Snacktify> what happens if a girl who is in the olympics is going to have her period during competition?
<deltax> then they put off the 100m cunnilingus for a week
<deltax> "this event cancelled due to bad turf" etc
#23634
(Mobius`) is there a disease where your hands always feel dirty and you wash them like every 20mins?
(dtw) excessive fisting
#57854
<RuKK> now, as far as measuring the temp of them
<RuKK> your pain threshhold is around 65-75 celcius
<RuKK> thats too hot.
<RuKK> so - the rule of thumb for voltage regulators being - much like sex - if it hurts, it may be a problem.
Comment: #hardware on efnet
#304159
elocin says: find someone on the internet. YAHOO ANSWER THAT SHIT
bryan says: theres a fucking hamster in a kimono on the homepage of yahoo answers and you expect me to trust this as a viable source of information
#52230
swtSeduction75: my mom just told me to wear a thong
DaceIre: cool!
DaceIre: Way to go mom!
swtSeduction75: well that was one of the two options
DaceIre: what was the other one?
swtSeduction75: uh
swtSeduction75: to not wear anything
DaceIre: Bad mom!
#54372
< zid`> the faster you go the slower time is
< zid`> you lose like 20 ns flying supersonic to america
< zid`> something like that
<+WhiteWolf> 20ns!??!
< syc> no you don't.
< syc> you lose 4 hours on the tarmac.
< syc> 2 hours in security.
#17469
HolyViper7: im confused as to how i'm still allowed to breathe the same oxygen as other human beings. i just bought some tic tacs, and most of em are gone... and you know how some tic tacs get like, stuck? well, see, i didnt wanna make too much noise so i put the tic tac container in my lap and i hit the container. it was then i realized i had testicles. it was quite painful
#3974
[OutLore ] horray! my crossover cable worked! putting ends on is easy....
[madwoota ] if you have a crimper :P
[OutLore ] took me 45 for the first one, 5 for the second.. :)
[madwoota ] cat5 ends take < 10 seconds
[OpsuPup ] but you're l33t woota
[OpsuPup ] how could OutLore possibly hope to compete with you?
[madwoota ] i know, it's tough, but someone has to be this good
#2785
* iban is going to invent a marriage simulator. It's a blowup doll that sits on the couch, takes your money, and slowly inflates larger and larger
#23622
* +Soul-Reaver continues his evil nocturnal deeds
<+Cyrrex> wackin it again, eh SR?
#3005
<Raz0r-> My SAT score wasn't anything spectacular. It was only a 360
#27763
HermitKing: So Star Trek fans are Trekkies, and X-files fans are X-philes...
HermitKing: ...what do you call Buffy fans?
Cat1013: Virgins
#15584
<synnex> AND I'M LIKE "THE BROADWAY PRODUCTION I JUST WROTE ENTITLED 'HITLER ON ICE'... IT'S LIKE CATS BUT WITH LESS CATS AND MORE HITLER... AND IT'S ALL ON ICE!!"
#37726
<Phlip_f00d> wow water takes a long time to boil if you turn the oven on instead of the stove
Comment: #blenderchat on FreeNode
#33366
<CaRaB3lla> god des..i love seeing you so bitchy!
<DesScorp> I know
<DesScorp> makes you horny, doesn't it?
<CaRaB3lla> makes me want to bend you over a barrel and have my way with you
<DesScorp> my asshole itches with anticipation
<DesScorp> wait
<DesScorp> that's the clap
<DesScorp> never mind
<KArmA-> I can see where you'd be confused
Comment: #bifemunix on EFnet