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#1595
<k-rad-bob> i think we need to like develop a bit further as persons
<Prae_> just as i thought
<k-rad-bob> i cant imagine what life would be like with no arms at all
<k-rad-bob> irc'ing with a spoon in your mouth
<Prae_> LOL
<k-rad-bob> no masturbating
<k-rad-bob> spending life on a quest for weird chicks who'd pittyfuck you
<k-rad-bob> or like team up with a legless chick
<k-rad-bob> imagine the sex
#32120
<GuyClimber> BRB? Where are you going?
<NawtyNice> I gotta go grab some nuts
<NawtyNice> Err, peanuts.
#309218
<@TheGiz> I think one day I'm going to invent a peripheral for games to drive home just how violent they are
<@TheGiz> Like a boxing glove on a spring and when you lose a fight in the game an on-screen prompt will instruct you to take your lumps like a man
<@TheGiz> And if you DON'T do it, then it'll wait until you're asleep and R2-D2 roll into your bedroom and sock you then
<@TheGiz> Gonna admit
<@TheGiz> I really just want to spend the rest of my life designing robots that punch people in the face
<@TheGiz> Either as video game peripherals
<@TheGiz> Enhanced interrogation machines
<@TheGiz> Gladiator Bloodsports
<@TheGiz> whatever
#49282
<TrogL> Found a new use for a chainsaw. Daughter's boyfriend wouldn't wake up. Ran the chainsaw outside his window. He bolted out of bed yelling "I didn't do it! I didn't do it!" He was still twitching three hours later
<Phoon> ROFLMAO
<Phoon> that's why nothing will beat a 12 gauge shotgun for home defense
<Phoon> Even a cat burglar with ice water in his veins will shit himself at the sound of a 12-gauge being pumped
<Phoon> you don't even need to fire it
<Phoon> hell, you don't even need the gun... just the cocking mechanism and a bottle of carpet cleaner to get rid of the shit stain
#15435
<Setups> is it a forest fire?
<Setups> I CAN SEE THE SMOKE FROM MY HOUSE
<SneakyPete> wtf going on setups? what state?
<Setups> its in alberta
<Setups> canada
<Raider|FIRE> must be forest fire
<travelyan> they have fire in canada?
<Setups> fuck you
<Setups> eh
#28981
<bailey> nice, i emailed a guy about his ebay auction asking if the soundcard he's selling works and comes with drivers
<bailey> and he replied "please do not bid on this item"
#295012
<hitmonchee> someone was talking about mice the other day and they mentioned that they hibernate
<hitmonchee> and I thought "how the fuck can an animal hibernate"
<hitmonchee> then I realised that they didn't mean saving the RAM to disk and shutting down
#2216
--- Topic for #celebs-n-models is <@YoGuRT_> beer just had his first Duck Job..how ya feel? <@Beercaps> same as before
<Digested> heh
<Digested> wtf is a duckjob?
<Beercaps> its bj from julia roberts
#77069
<Parable> Just because I fucked a girl twice doesn't mean I'm hetero! ;_;
<Jetta> Parable, thats twice more than a few in here
#3259
(acidic) i love it how my g/f calls me "fucker" with so much affection.
#301829
< shortcircuit> So here's a fun joke to play on your Star Trek loving friends. Ask them what the name of Star Trek V was, but don't let them look it up online.
< shortcircuit> Most people I've asked get it wrong; they give the name for Star Trek VI instead.
< SilentAgony> attack of the clones
< Mattijle> empire strikes back?
#1605
<tgpretend> MICROSOFT BRAIN DRAIN CONTINUES. Fourteen-year
<tgpretend> vet. Paul Maritz resigns.
<tgpretend> how can he be an m$ veterna if he's only 14?
#3218
<Richie> i kinda sent him the strange link to gay porn
<duckman> so he sent you here?
<Richie> revenge is strange sometimes
<Joshua> well... i guess we know what we have to do...
* Joshua takes off his pants
#7109
(@sno) Emacs can mow down forests too. But it mows down forests with the passing of its fat, bloated ass.
#19794
GOBDOME123: What happened?
TythePope: I called your ass.
GOBDOME123: My ass didn't ring.
#301414
<@GaidinBDJ> Wanna feel old? Just think, if they remade Back to the Future now, they would be travelling back to 1980.
#157391
wasted` : so basically you fucked a virgin and were disappointed by her lack of experience?
#8632
<@Lum_> 128 mb is enough
<@Lum_> it's fucking enough for microsoft dev studio
<@da_slog> NO IT ISNT STFU NEWB
<@Lum_> I think it's enough for my TANK GAME
#2489
<pesert> Command line?
<pesert> Is that like a special cable?
#59329
<psychup2034> i was watching judge judy two weeks ago
<psychup2034> fucking dad and daughter when to court
<psychup2034> because of a broken headlight on a car
<psychup2034> the dad blamed the daughter
<psychup2034> but the daughter said she thinks someone came with something and knocked the headlights in
<psychup2034> judge judy was like do you have any proof
<psychup2034> and the daughter said "we live in a black neighborhood"
<psychup2034> never laughed so hard at court tv
#15312
รบรนรบ Quits: JESUS (adam@rootdown.net): Ping timeout
<Cyph3r> jesus died from my syn's
#50647
<Eonwe> the moon tonight is gorgeous
<Smeghead> Thank you. I just had it waxed.
<JoeK> Oh my god, yes it is
<JoeK> red-orange
<Smeghead> Well, there was some irritation...
* Jessity goes to look
* Smeghead drops trou
#15450
<merl> in the UK things are generally pretty wet
<merl> we've adapted
<merl> webbed feet n shit
#54224
<EFX> I saw a black guy with a shirt on the other day that said " keep staring, maybe I'll steal your car "
#53486
*** lowenergy is now known as emojesus
<emojesus> watch me turn water into whine