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#45975
<EccleS> EriK: I'm more concerned about lying helpless in the dentists chair, while some trained sadist waves electrical equipment in my face
<capgadget> Just grab the dental nurses crotch. At least you will have an excuse.
<capgadget> Unless it is a male nurse.
<capgadget> THen you are up shit creek.
<capgadget> Unless he's gay.
<_Arthur> gays often go up shit creek
#33375
<AliceInWonderland> <--- DIRTY DIRTY WHORE
<HPZ> <--- has a nozzle full of whorecleaning solution
#774
<Maarken> anyone know of good places to price cisco stuff? I don't want to do all their touchy feely salesperson shit.
#43490
<Calum> going to bed at 4am, then getting woken by traffic at 8am is unpleasant
<Calum> *grumbles about his head being sore*
<Alice> How about going to bed at 1 am and waking up at 5 to go to work?
<Calum> that's also unpleasant
<Alice> It is what I am about to do
<Calum> i've gone to bed at 5 and gotten up at 6 for work before
<@ALC> but its effectively 2 am :p
<+MStar> or drinking heavily and waking up the next morning wearing nothing but kitty ears in some stranger guy's bed?
<Calum> wtf?
<Alice> o.O
<@ALC> ...
<+MStar> i mean.. finish school project at 4 and need to wake up at 7.
<Calum> oh yeah, that's unpleasant.
#10983
<outlaws> that's so gay
<joyrekz> speaking of gay
<joyrekz> i watched the gay pride parade on tv just to see some lesbians, is that wrong of me?
<outlaws> nope
#296772
<Kayeffem|wrkin> so i got a good story for all of you
<Kayeffem|wrkin> yesterday the supreme bitch brought in her home laptop because i needed to set it up for remote access
<Kayeffem|wrkin> while it was here she decided to bitch about how the screen isnt used up all the way and there are spaces on the sides
<Kayeffem|wrkin> now this is a 17" widescreen laptop
<Kayeffem|wrkin> and it's being used at the max widescreen resolution
<Kayeffem|wrkin> as i play around with it i notice that there's nothing wrong and the screen is just fine
<Kayeffem|wrkin> so she tells me to goto the internet and goto a webpage
<Kayeffem|wrkin> where i find out her real problem
<Kayeffem|wrkin> the websites that she likes to visit dont expand to fit multiple resolutions
<Kayeffem|wrkin> thus causing empty space to the left and right of the main webpage
<Kayeffem|wrkin> now apparently this is a big enough problem for her that she's going to purchase a second laptop that's smaller
<Kayeffem|wrkin> so that the websites will take up the full screen with no gaps
<JackWat|Lap> HAHAHAHHAHAHAHHA
<JackWat|Lap> Kayeffem|wrkin: thats fuckin crazy
<Adam^2> crazy bitch is crazy
<Kayeffem|wrkin> yea, i almost asked her if she was fucking with me
#44410
Kodan882: I DID NOT JUST MAKE THAT TYPO
Kodan882: i went to look up Breastplate on wikipedia
Kodan882: but i instead typed Beastality
Kodan882: FUCK
DragonmasterJB0: HAHAHAHAHAHAH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
DragonmasterJB0: Gogo Freud.
#5763
<Urganite> THERE ARE NO BAGELS BUT ONION, AND MOHAMMED IS HIS PROPHET
<Urganite> ...
<OneiWilly> you are worshipping a false bagel
#176553
< nitrogen> who played tony stark in the new iron man?
< curgoth> Robert Downey Jr.
< curgoth> best choice for an alcoholic ego-maniac evar
< Novel> I thought that would be charlie sheen
< jose_> i thought that was gw bush
< curgoth> ok, but no one is going to believe charlie sheen playing a genius
< curgoth> and, um, ditto
< curgoth> imagine either sheen or bush uttering the line "if my math is right - and it always is..."
#4502
<Khross|Zzz> You can't have my precious cock ring.
<nilBnW|Zzz> You'll have to pry it from my cold, dead cock!!
#14443
<Ria> Type in the search word,
<Ria> apply pressure to button,
<Ria> then read the results.
<Ria> it's a haiku!
#49262
<|VIPER|> how can i find the number of files in a directory? (including sub-dirs)
<Petarius> right click -> properties
<Petarius> Oh wait, this is a linux channel
Comment: #gentoo @ EFnet
#45978
Salixa: I used to have to skin dead mice and chop them up to feed to owls
Salixa: brb looney tunes time
Salixa: :-)
Olego: You have a vile sense of humour.
#20780
« turkey » when a baby matures to age 16 (well, thats when it happened for me), it grows testicles, large frogs in its throat, and hair all over
« turkey » then the spleen explodes and an alien comes out
« turkey » and thats how babys are made
« Dilbert » when does the stork come?
« turkey » When you jack him off long enough
#8997
<ChibiLion> i think girls should have the right to show as much or as little of their own body as they want..
<EnZeRuMei> so if there any girls in this nice yet weird chan PLEASE for men's sake DONT EVEN PUT CLOTHES ON ( thongs allowed ) ( Only pretty girls )
<ChibiLion> thats not what i ment >.<
#283996
<Krechet> don't set your alarm clock tonight
<Krechet> let god decide whether you go to school tommorow or not
#2296
<maff> the grue wears a +3 amulet of bling blingin'
#11943
<Normandy> I like Pixie's spelling late at night
<Pixie_Pete> kick Normandy SUHT PU 0F0!!!11
#32820
• +mirthy throws geru into the deep Xenogears ocean!
(+mirthy) ¯`·.¸¸.·´¯`·.¸¸.·´¯`·.¸¸.·´¯`·.¸¸.·´
(+mirthy) ¸.·´¯`·.¸¸¸.·´¯`·.¸\o/¸.·´¯`·.¸.·´¯`
(+mirthy) ¸.·´¯`·.¸.·´¯`·.¸¸.·´¯`·.¸¸.·´¯`·.¸¸
#1529
<AlexChiu> Brent: Oh yeah. Well, would you have felt better if I hadn't told you about it and you got hit with a noxious stench upon prying off a girl's dry, crusty panties?
#298640
<SHIMADA> i'm seriously gonna quit coding
<SHIMADA> i watched that notorious flick and biggy asked his mom "how much does a garbage collector make?"
<SHIMADA> so i was like how does this fat moron know about software that wasn't even invented yet back then 0_o
#31801
<Chiffy> hah
<Chiffy> I was at a local skateboard shop with my mom
<Chiffy> and I look up and see a deck with a picture of a drunk mexican screwing a crocodile and I laugh
<Chiffy> she looks up
<Chiffy> and mentions something like 'oh animal planet crocodile guy'
<Chiffy> it took about 5 seconds for her to go 'uh, wait'
#30939
<RageAgainstTheAmish> brb making smores
<RageAgainstTheAmish> FUCK MY OVEN IS ON FIRE BRB
<RageAgainstTheAmish> HOLY FUCK MY KITCHEN IS ON FIRE
<RageAgainstTheAmish> OMFG
<RageAgainstTheAmish> BRB AFK
<RageAgainstTheAmish> OH MY GOD DUDE IM CALLING 911 BRB
<ducky[kC]> lmfao
<ducky[kC]> poor joe
*RageAgainstTheAmish Quit (Connection reset by peer)
#69532
<clifgriffin> Women idolize a level of beauty only achievable through Photoshop.
#14953
<TsB-Thuggish> i hate it when you can't explain what i mean