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#28315
<Dru> been going strong for like 20 minutes
<Velcro_> the viagra's helping eh?
<Dru> yeah like i need drugs to keep a constant hard on
<Quorthy> viagra is for ppl without usenet access
<Quorthy> & usenet is for ppl without vagina access
#191029
<AshViper> OMFG
<AshViper> one of my HDDs had a birthday 21 days ago
<AshViper> and i totally forgot
<AshViper> S.M.A.R.T. needs a birthday reminder imo
#44276
<@TimJohnson> im going to try and cook bacon on my george format grill
<@TimJohnson> yeyah
* Dudette formats the grill
<%Sunbun> the George Format Grill: Knocks out the FAT32
Comment: #theromcafe
#50774
<@philb> I have a new task at work, I have to improve traffic to the website by not changing anything or advertising
<@philb> I've decided to use chanting
<@philb> I'll tail -f the logs of the webservers on a giant projector screen in an abandoned church
<@philb> and chant a lot.
#43467
<popeye> rolloffle do you eat meat
<rolloffle> of course I do
<popeye> if you do then you murder
<rolloffle> you think I'm some kind of fag or something?
<popeye> well you are from europe
<popeye> so how does it feel to be a murderer
<rolloffle> pretty tasty.
Comment: #gnaa irc.gnaa.us
#34176
<Rjx> what
<Rjx> ian curtis killed himself?
<timmo> rjx: yeah, a long ass time ago
<Rjx> I only found out kurt cobain died like 2 years ago
<timmo> ...
<timmo> youre not up on the news
<Rjx> no, I'm not
Comment: #GeekIssues EFNet (March 2004)
#5443
<Goku> :O
<kepler> hold that face goku
*kepler unzips
*aegis runs away
#61333
JakManga: hey - you're still awake! can i ask you a quick question?
moonraven: You just did!
JakManga: oh and hello how rude of me...
moonraven: Hola!
JakManga: oh damn.... do i get more than one question?
moonraven: Apparently you get 2
#11164
<Helm-work> *sigh* ..i dont know what gets into me sometimes.. I get this "hey, my password says it expires today and i need to change it" "what do i change it to"? .... im like "how about tea-bagger"? "thats a good one" .. the accountant is like "yeah! easy to remember too"
#8197
<er0s> you know, i've only ever been wrong once in my life, and that's when i thought i was wrong but was actually right.
#246997
<Annie> Vagina ^_^
*Annie (~Annie@Annie.Annie) has left #plott
<Golvmopp> o.o
<Golvmopp> A GIRL WAS HERE
<Golvmopp> A GIRL WAS HERE
<Some> What is a girl? :o
<Golvmopp> I read about them in a magazine
<Golvmopp> They are like us, but they like horses.
Comment: #plott on Rizon
#18846
<aphelion> 'GKZKGJ
<aphelion> OMFG
<aphelion> wt
<Flatline-> aphelion just figured out masterbation
#42057
<Celestar> I almost got trapped yesterday
<Celestar> in a fucking car park
<Celestar> I was just paying, and suddenly the only gate began to close
<Celestar> so I ran up and found a photo sensor
<Celestar> luckily I always have duct tape in my bag
<Celestar> so I patched the light barrier with duct tape
<Celestar> to get my car
<GeniusDex> lol good work Celestar :P
#20517
<SteamedHams> jesus christ, it's not like insulting zirc is blasphemy for gods sake
<SteamedHams> fucking hell
<SteamedHams> moses cunt
<SteamedHams> apostle gayrape
#310585
< rycuda> Well, turns out that I need glasses
< BrainoMite> rycuda, walk into the wall again?
< rycuda> BrainoMite: close, I walked into an optician
#33227
* Drummer_B has joined #emu
<Drummer_B> may i ask if this is a roms channel?
<nylint> drummer_b: all you have to do is !list
<Drummer_B> ahhhhhhhhhh ok thanks :)
<Drummer_B> !list
* Drummer_B was kicked by nylint (auto-kick: no triggers or roms, bitch!)
* Drummer_B has joined #emu
<nylint> and you'll get kicked
<nylint> i didn't tell you what it would DO
Comment: #emu efnet kthxbye
#4790
<DAL9000> my pseudogirlfriend's preacher was like, all over her
<DAL9000> and she's not very liked at her church
<DAL9000> cuz they think she's seducing him
<trep> pseudogirlfriend, haha
<DAL9000> yes
<DAL9000> that's a fancy word for stalking interest.
#30406
<iPBS> you know
<iPBS> there were billions of virus emails traveling the net last week
<iPBS> people were complainging about getting hundreds of emails in their inbox's
<iPBS> and i didn't get a single email virus
<slightly> me neither
<iPBS> whats that say about our popularity?
<slightly> :(
#6975
<vampyr> i didn't lose it in the sense of i can't find it
<vampyr> i lost it networkically
#35217
* Tetra takes a boy
<Tetra> bow
<Tetra> damnit
<Tetra> bad bad mistype
* Tetra goes away to cry
#1354
<Brentai> I have Q3, but I like playing it about as much as I like trying to suck my own wang.
<Brentai> i.e. it's painful and futile, but once and a while I try to do it just to prove that I can. And I can't.
#2474
<Server_X> i need to take my modem out tonight
<Server_X> is it true that you have to wax your modem if it is a 56k once every month?
#34302
<TheGreatDrunkMonkey> It's like a book report from Hell
<Mayseth> Sounds like alot of writing, I'll get you started.
<Mayseth> Page 1: It was short, and boring. Losing interest to read book.
<Mayseth> page 2: Still boring. I fell asleep. Will continue in the morning.
<Mayseth> Page 2.5: God this book sucks.
<Mayseth> Page 3: I downloaded the rest of this report off the internet. Enjoy.
#42967
<+Sekkira> the OS is popping at me
<+Maeg> popping?
<+Maeg> that's what happens when you heat up the kernel
Comment: #knet @ irc.rizon.net
#309884
* Mondale (~Mondale@CPE-120-148-236-70.hdqu1.vic.bigpond.net.au) has joined #fountain_pens
<kerin> sup, nerd
<Mondale> sup nerd
<kerin> punctuatin'
<kerin> to a limited extent
<kerin> you?
<Mondale> wtf does that mean
<kerin> it's a contraction of "punctuating"
<kerin> which means applying punctuation to sentences
<Mondale> why would you need to do that?
<kerin> "to a limited extent" indicates that this punctuation is incomplete
<Mondale> yes, but why
<kerin> because punctuation provides additional clarity when parsing sentences
<kerin> and my closing "you?" is digressing to inquire, out of politeness, about whatever tragically uninteresting bullshit you occupy your time with
<jrvc> OH BURN