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#19692
·jliechty· all right, i'm so fucking bored now
·jliechty· this sucks
•bryce• go and get a deer head to mount
·jliechty· sounds like a good idea
·jliechty· where can i find one?
•bryce• on a deer
#637
<MrFalcon> Rattus: it's just random chance that i hit the keyboard in such a way that my responses make sense
#61916
<e|cel> who is ray charles ?
<e|cel> a musician i see
<TodesAngst> yeah, but he didn't
#659
<imminent> clean keyboard
<imminent> yesss
<edible> you desemenized it?
<edible> let some cum hungry slut lick the shit out of your keyboard?
#306132
< mike|laptop> osama bin laden was killed before duke nukem forever came out
#35401
«XAnimal» I can fist my own throat
«SilentB» There is no emoticon to describe the horror of what you just said.
#308490
<PyroPyro> a guy just fax'd me a paper with text "i dont know how this works i will just email the doc to you"
#14316
BoobiePatutti> My mom is now telling me what Hobbits do with their feet at night.
BoobiePatutti> Feeting.
BoobiePatutti> Like fisting, only with their feet.
#21915
<Major_Tom> anyone know if you can do anything with the USB port on a cable box?
<Major_Tom> I googled, but found nothing
<drwiii> i'm no expert, but maybe you can plug a USB cable into it.
#4200
*** Quits: Disco[d2] (k-lined: u stole my girlfriend! (edison))
#4170
<morte> Jesus Peanut Butter Cups: Little pieces of the Son of God in a milk chocolate cup! There's no wrong way to eat a Jesus!
#37896
<TrafficCone> So I'm talking to my friend the day after I nailed his older sister in the bathroom ofthe local movie theater
<TrafficCone> and he starts going off about some time i made a total ass of my self in front of some girl i liked in high school when i was drunk
<FKNPWNED> Go on...
<TrafficCone> and there's a freaking platoon of people i don't want to hear this shit around, so i pipe up and say,
<TrafficCone> "Hey dude, your sister likes it when I slap her in the face with my Dick"
<TrafficCone> The next thing I know, I'm in the emergency room. The bastard knocked me out with a chair leg.
Comment: 0wn3d
#2201
<Guilty> I see, your ignorance expands far beyond ATI video cards
#299883
ftmysally: I can not send email at all
ctnpinciotti: Go into your account settings and set your imap one to default.
ftmysally: my imap account is my default
ctnpinciotti: What happens when you try to send?
ftmysally: nothing unless I press send and receive
ctnpinciotti: So what happens when you do that...
ftmysally: it sends
ctnpinciotti: so...
ftmysally: never mind
#31900
<LuminuS> everything you like = gay
<SniperGuy> i like you LuminuS
Comment: irc.mikernet.org
#78929
<riko> dammit this has gotta stop.
<Baph> ?
<riko> my stepdad's been using my computer, going on porn, and saving it onto my desktop with the filenames set as numbers so i don't know what it is and i have to click on it to check.
<Baph> I thought your stepdad was gay?
<riko> precisely.
#5819
[Synoptica] Just when you thought porn spam couldn't stoop any lower...
[Synoptica] 'DOGFART SLUTS!'
#26308
Methodical Pain: but tomatoes are fruits
TheOffspring326: no they're not!
TheOffspring326: they merely prefer the company of other tomatoes, thats all!
#53153
<+Durandal> you said you'd be right back
<+r0bin> yeah
<+r0bin> An hour an ten minutes is "right"
<+Durandal> ah
<+r0bin> Espescially since my average "bbl" is three to four months
<+Durandal> heh, that's for damn sure
<+r0bin> :P
<+Durandal> of course i've been known to disappear for a year
<+Durandal> or more
<@kefx> r0bin: haha
<+r0bin> Durandal: that's my "afk"
Comment: #metawire
#310342
< cbreak> if the C++ committee was lead by Microsoft's Excel team... auto would be called car in the english version of C++.
#22304
<ChOwShAdY> like i fucked a 14 year old when i was 17
<ChOwShAdY> she was immature as a motherufcker
<@impuritor> dude, that is quite possibly the dumbest thing i've ever heard anyone say in my entire life
<@impuritor> that's like saying
<@impuritor> "My car runs like shit when i'm out of gas"
#11158
-|Darky|ZzZ- Repeat Flood Detected Please do not repeat in #pack (Last & Only Warning)
<|Darky|ZzZ> princess: Please do not repeat in #pack
<princess> ack! not again! :(
* princess says again, i am no fl00der (
<princess> :(
<apekatt> that's just a sign that says you need to expand your vocabulary
<apekatt> hehe
#29906
<ZyKl0n> my uncle died on saturday
<ZyKl0n> :(
<ZyKl0n> I don't understand it... he was 43
<ZyKl0n> I hope I don't die when I'm 43
<j0sh> sux to be himi
<j0sh> did he die on the toilet
<j0sh> ?
<ZyKl0n> no... dropped dead walking up a driveway to an auction
<ZyKl0n> just keeled over
<j0sh> ROFL
<j0sh> did u take pics
<j0tun> OMG
<j0tun> what kinda question is that?
#300697
<Green> So I got in my car
<Green> and there was birdshit on my windsheild
<Green> so i got a paper towel and got out to wipe it off
<Green> but it wouldn't come off
<Green> and thats when I realized it was on the INSIDE
<Green> I had a hard time getting to sleep that night
#3828
<Sylffor> I prefer "blood-engorged mayonaisse cannon" or "yogurt slinger"
<nitrifik_> ok. Sylffor knows too many colorful synonyms for 'dick'.
* Sylffor is a homosexual, remember?
<nitrifik_> you being gay is fine.
<nitrifik_> I draw the line at "blood-engorged mayonaisse cannon".