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#6420
--- [signoff!#windowmaker] NinjaCodr (wife getting naked)
#130097
<+openfly> i did a self evaluation once.
<+openfly> i don't think they'll ever ask for one again.
<+openfly> i had fucking charts in it.
#26214
<Dekkon> SHE HAS DSL
<Killrbyte> Digital Subscriber Line?
<nyisles> is it from Speakeasy?
<Killrbyte> Tell her to get cable. Its faster.
<Dekkon> DICK SUCKING LIPS
<Dekkon> DAMN NERDS
#85388
Sean: cause you see more deer on the nuke station's property
Sean: they know there is no danger within the fence
Aaron: Can those ones talk?
Sean: well, its been there 30 somethign years
Sean: i'm sure they've figured it out
Aaron: Haha. You'll have to ask one.
Sean: well most places deer run and hide at the sight of a car or person
Sean: here they'll stand on the curb and eat grass while construction workers are working and cars are going by
Sean: with no cover or anything
Aaron: Ah. Someone should give them something to fear...
Sean: they have nothing, they found a wolf on site once, and it was shot
Aaron: They've built weapons?!
#22349
<gilesw> so wtf is damn v-station
<gilesw> it was supposed to be out ages ago
<ToyLaNdeR> thats like a train station, but run by this guy named victor
#4075
<Zooropa> :B
<Lynkx> you have an ass on your chin
#50388
<Slater_> I HATE sticky keys!
<Slater_> I specifically remember being just about to take that perfect headshot in Counter-Strike, tapping the shift-key to sneak a bit forward for a clean view. ...and then...
<Slater_> "Hello! We think you must be severely handicapped, since you just pressed the shift key. We will now close your game and teach you a bit about using your computer with no hands. Love thy Windows experience!"
#295469
<Stueh> This has been the last hour for me:
<Stueh> "Windows Update needs to install an update for Windows Update. Please click the Download and Install button to download and install the update for Windows Update."
Stueh laughs
<Stueh> "Windows Update cannot connect to the internet."
Stueh cries
<Stueh> The ethernet driver is now mysteriously not installed anymore.
Stueh screams
<Stueh> "Windows cannot locate a driver for your ethernet card. Would you like Windows to connect to Windows Update and find a driver for you?"
#34509
[sQurl] jesus is there anything that isn't broken right now?
[r1ch] customers phones
#118
<voln> I am going to build the first car that has built-in IRC
#8356
<Nev|Away> When did I pick on you, you ugly little horrible turd?
<Nev|Away> Give me your lunch money.
#38197
<Fennec> gumby_jd: I know. A "you have been drafted" spam scam! :)
<vAE86> Fennec: that's so funny, and it'd prolly work
<@Scoth> Fennec: The sad thing is it'd probably work
<@Scoth> Yeah
<@Scoth> Just a simple "You have been drafted, call this number to confirm and get flight arrangements" and see how many call
<vAE86> all you'd have to say, is call 1800 4 usarmy, for details on how to get ahold of your recruiter and tell him you've been drafted.
<vAE86> those evil recruiters would suck them right up
<@Scoth> Haha. That'd be so evil. The caller thinks they've been drafted, the recruiter things someone is volunteering, no one would be the wiser until later
<vAE86> until it was beyond hope
<@Scoth> *fade into a scene in Iraq, two soldiers chatting* "So, why'd you join?" "I got drafted. Stupid Bush." "What? There is no draft." "What? I got an e-mail..." "Oh, that's a scam. Haha!" "Crap.."
#44075
<Cthon98> hey, if you type in your pw, it will show as stars
<Cthon98> ********* see!
<AzureDiamond> hunter2
<AzureDiamond> doesnt look like stars to me
<Cthon98> <AzureDiamond> *******
<Cthon98> thats what I see
<AzureDiamond> oh, really?
<Cthon98> Absolutely
<AzureDiamond> you can go hunter2 my hunter2-ing hunter2
<AzureDiamond> haha, does that look funny to you?
<Cthon98> lol, yes. See, when YOU type hunter2, it shows to us as *******
<AzureDiamond> thats neat, I didnt know IRC did that
<Cthon98> yep, no matter how many times you type hunter2, it will show to us as *******
<AzureDiamond> awesome!
<AzureDiamond> wait, how do you know my pw?
<Cthon98> er, I just copy pasted YOUR ******'s and it appears to YOU as hunter2 cause its your pw
<AzureDiamond> oh, ok.
#6848
<Iggz> i had a touching experience on the subway today
<Iggz> i sat beside a priest
<spoon> kinky
<Iggz> ......
#57019
<Malphas> How many femanists does it take to change a light bulb?
<@Cassie> Oh no
<Malphas> Two. One to change the bulb and the other to suck my dick.
*** You have been kicked from #Womens_Issues
#15417
<andyd> No, I'm not being difficult
<andyd> but it is ACTUALLY IMPOSSIBLE TO BUY LICENSES FOR SOFTWARE WHEN THE LICENSES HAVE BEEN WITHDRAWN FROM SALE,
<gardron> lol
<gardron> client?
<andyd> I can't tell. For a moment I thought that it was a brick wall.
#31827
<niteshade> awww this is shit.
<niteshade> my router's stuck in a routing loop
<Sendai> power cycle
<niteshade> i mean at UPS
<Sendai> Your router runs UPS?
<niteshade> no I mean I ordered it and it's come through oregon, into seattle, back to oregon and into seattle again. I just checked and it's back in oregon. UPS is looping!
<Sendai> lol
<beer> lol. that doesn't bode well
<niteshade> no shit. I ordered it to replace a crappy dlink that kept fucking with my network
<beer> dlink r good
<niteshade> nup this one was going into routing loops
<niteshade> am I in the twilight zone?
#51373
NES: you should do what I did and try to convince your boss to migrate their whole massive application from vb6 to .net
NES: tell them it'll be very easy
NES: and then leave the company
#303934
< niekie> Someone said to someone else "There's a hole in your shirt."
< niekie> That was just the perfect moment for me to say "That's better than the other way around."
#26337
<RageFury> 1-800-Wheelchair.com looking for Web Dev. ASAP (Williamsburg, Brooklyn)
<RageFury> I guess they will be interested in server side push technologies.
<RageFury> Their clients can't move themselves.
#7490
<sortof> i slept on a glowstick wrong
#294500
<MurderMachine> So did I ever tell you the story of how my parents met?
<DryBones> Nope.
<MurderMachine> Well, there are two versions I guess.
<DryBones> How?
<MurderMachine> The story my Mum tells is: A group of idiots pushed her over while ice skating and my Dad heroically went over and helped her up.
<MurderMachine> The story my Dad tells is: He paid a group of idiots to go push her over so he could go heroically help her up.
<DryBones> ROFL
<MurderMachine> I have been paid not to tell her.
#306066
<izua> are you a prophet?
<clueless> yes
<izua> show me your prophet license
<clueless> ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
<clueless> ^ LICENSED PROPHET ^
<clueless> ^ CLUELESS ^
<clueless> ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
<izua> dammit.
#112
<Amanda`> 'THE HELL..? IS 5 AM...GO THE HELL TO BED... IN TROUBLE YOU ARE...SPEECH MY SLURRED IS'
#56434
<Dr_Pressure> George Bush wants to eat at that "New Delhi" that he's heard so much about