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#14249
<andjusticeforall> I've figured it out. If you ever get mugged by someone, just say, "Take it easy man, all I got is a $16 bill", then knee him in the nuts when he tries to figure out what the fuck you just said.
#11214
<Meat_PoPs> what a guy, jumps all over you then falls asleep
* Meat_PoPs shakes his head
<Mog> thats what most men would do
<Meat_PoPs> hehe
<Mog> pretend to fall asleep, plus women have a naturaly built in pillow for us
<Coan_Arcanius> hehe
<Meat_PoPs> mmm they are cushy
#47172
[10:39] <netmunky> a notice to users: do not open any URL containing sonask.org or pamelasporn.mpg, this is a self-spreading trojan. if you think you are infected, use task manager to kill mirc.exe, and del c:\windows\system32\mirc.exe
[10:44] <netmunky> yes, i am well aware many of you run linux, congratulations to bird60356, you were the first to notify me. to the other 2 dozen, i don't care
#235848
<Jeribot> hahah that reminds me dudes
<Jeribot> one of my students today for their pirate journal entry?
<Jeribot> wrote about "captain tupac, who was killed by a sail-by cannoning"
#34999
<Zuwadza> Ha
<Zuwadza> Apparently a young girl in Jackie Chan's fan club killed herself when she found out he was married
<Zutroy> not a big fan if she didn't know that
<Zutroy> poseur
Comment: Err, no comment.
#54270
<@ALGORYTHM> myspace is like goatse but for web designers
#6646
<rewben> we are not perverts ;p
<akiron> speak for youself ;)
#8687
<Ryk> "let's be friends" is what chicks say when they're feeling guilty about shafting someone.
<Ryk> they don't mean it.
<Ryk> they mean the kind of friends that never speak and never see each other.
<Tippytoes> thats the best kind of friends
#307623
<azonenberg> wordpress is an unauthenticated remote shell that, as a useful side feature, also contains a blog
#1331
<felix> that raid card is gonna saturate that machine
<felix> that's like giving a chihuahua a fire hydrant enema.
#60378
<OpZChAoS> hands up anyone who has ever stuffed up a linux installation
* SKoRM puts hands up
<Peppery> never :)
<SKoRM> put a finger up for every time your windows has crashed?
* SKoRM puts up 17
<Peppery> cant...
<Peppery> fingers dont go that high
#50774
<@philb> I have a new task at work, I have to improve traffic to the website by not changing anything or advertising
<@philb> I've decided to use chanting
<@philb> I'll tail -f the logs of the webservers on a giant projector screen in an abandoned church
<@philb> and chant a lot.
#28983
<germany> is it true that every girl and boy in france has to learn how to sew a white flag when they're in school?
#27273
* moralove has joined #SimGames
<moralove> !list
<moralove> !find simcity
<sine-wave> !goaway
<sine-wave> !nowarezhere
<moralove> !haveagooddaynegativity
* moralove has left #SimGames
#305714
<RAMPKORV> During the days of Yahoo IM, I added a guy randomly, then started spamming him with PENIS
<RAMPKORV> Appearantly, I did it exactly when he was doing a presentation for work
<fusion2004> gahaha
<RAMPKORV> and he replied 15 minutes later and was pretty angry
#53335
<frosty-theaussie> "i dont know. we just dont celebrate christmas like you do... we actually remember why christmas is here, not just to give gifts"
<frosty-theaussie> if someone said that to you
<frosty-theaussie> youd think that theyre attacking you for not celebrating christmas like devout christians do, wouldnt you?
<HoneyBunny> wtf is the point of christmas without gifts?
<HoneyBunny> thats like religion without blatant lies and weak unrealistic stories
#302145
< incluye> Oh my fucking are you serious
< incluye> Today's the day for Lesson 4.04 in Modern World Studies in my online course.
< incluye> GUESS WHAT ERROR I GET WHEN I GO TO IT
#2074
<memo> Kazz, do you WANT your dick bit off? Didn't we just have an in-depth discussion earlier today on why that's not a good thing?
#103505
<tonyyarusso> So I just went and looked at my Newegg order status, and saw a message I've never seen before:
<tonyyarusso> "THE PACKAGE IS DELAYED DUE TO A TRAIN DERAILMENT[X] "
#37342
< dildohead> i know 2 guys who major'd in english
< dildohead> and theyre both homeless
Comment: #geekissues
#22086
[Painless] "when I reach an adult runlevel and have /dev/son0 and /dev/daughter0 I'm gonna teach them safe hex"
#46477
<Goat> see? Look at how cool it is. That's why i put it as my homepage.
<girl__> Goat: change your nick. "Goatse? Look at how cool it is. That's why i put it as my homepage."
*** "Goat" is now known as "Tub"
<Tub> Girl, I love thee for pointing that out. =)
#142941
<mgregory> Setting IE to 'secure' is a lot like putting on your seatbelt in a crashing plane
#2767
*** civicsi was kicked by Raegen (KK: go away jason)
civicsi is jason@adsl-208-188-253-138.dsl.stlsmo.swbell.net * Jason Preston
civicsi on #cars
civicsi using irc2.lightning.net Toca's Miracle
civicsi End of /WHOIS list.
*** civicsi (jason@adsl-208-188-253-138.dsl.stlsmo.swbell.net) has joined #cars
<civicsi> uhhh
<civicsi> HOW DID YOU GET MY NAME?
<Tokae> we are l33t
<Darn> haha he hacked you
<KK> shutup jason
<civicsi> how did you do that?
<Tokae> you will be fuct over jason if you act out of line.
<KK> Mr Preston
<civicsi> I hope you know that I have logs of all hacking attempts
<civicsi> and I WILL forward them to the DOJ
#18453
<Penguin> My love for you is like diarrhea, I just can't hold it in.