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#1481
<Edge_> and i am like tearing my thumb apart
<[cut]> can you still masturbate edge?
<Edge_> i think i will be ok
#307623
<azonenberg> wordpress is an unauthenticated remote shell that, as a useful side feature, also contains a blog
#307161
<jwgoerlich> As an aside, I get concerned when my wife says "let me set the mood with music" ...
<jwgoerlich> And then proceeds to play the Impossible Mission theme song.
#4326
<MrFreeze> AND I PUT 3 OZ OF WEED IN 2 COOKIES
<MrFreeze> AND THEY WERE LIKE 1" ACROSS
<MrFreeze> MMM THEY WERE YUM!
<noj> and 2 feet high!
#2839
<drBoston> DGMage : asl
<DGMage> You seriously need a new pickup line.
<drBoston> never
<drBoston> you don't fuck with perfection
#34735
<Neon[UK]> fool
<Neon[UK]> i hope the cd player ejects the cd really fast and slices your head off
Comment: #geekissues EFnet
#295812
<@toastydea> dear lord, i have to have "the talk" with my mom
<@toastydea> about why we can't be friends on facebook
#7436
<DangerousBeauty> do u seeing me giving two fucks?
<Phuser> i see you giving everyone fucks
#33595
<Fonix> Windows told me to make a new password and I put in 'penis'...
<Fonix> and it said it was too short. :(
#913
<matt`> dear god freshmeat looks like ass
<matt`> probably making use of the html 5 <ass> tag
<matt`> <ass tables><hard to read text>blah blah blah</hard to read text><more ass tables><gayness></more ass tables><some gay color></gayness><ass tables>
#670
<Johnno> wouldnt it be cool if there was a cow that had a door on it's side, that when you opened it up, it produced nummmy pie
<wonko> that's a good idea! hold on while I round up some venture capital...
#4696
<DML> Heh... my sister just IM'd me. My sister is cool and shit. I wish I could be eclectic, funky, and well-adjusted
<Drusilla> we do too, Dan.
<tieboy> well, 0 out of 3 ain't bad
#68041
<bubba> don't they have laws against lying in advertising?
<bubba> this coax cable i just bought says "Connects satellite and digital cable sources with no signal loss"
<glasnost> "Comes with complementary 'Fuck you, second law of thermodynamics' bumper sticker"
#3052
<WillaCuz> shervin did u say u had a woman?
<shervin> WillaCuz: yeah but its losing pressure, i think it has a hole or something
#28309
<Boogieman> and I saw a girl and was like "hey baby, you lookin' for a good time"
<Boogieman> and she said "yes"
<Boogieman> and I just sorta stared
<Boogieman> cause I don't usually get that far
<Boogieman> and I didn't have anything to say
#34750
<Theogony> e and his community service
<Theogony> he needs to be buying me lunch right now. i've gone 9.5 days without insulting him regarding a certain physical characteristic
<Theogony> i told him my idea of community service is to leave torrent files open after i've downloaded them
<KArmA-> hehehe
<KArmA-> you're a credit to the species
Comment: #couch on EFnet
#28916
<zdog> Cuz you're stupid.
<boo> ah, the crux of Internet Debate.
#50339
CatDog: I'm gonna ask the girl in english class what wow sever she plays on
CatDog: other guys get phone numbers i get ip addresses
Comment: irc.bungie.org #hat-trick
#224378
*** Joins: Skrail (~Pleinair@8B4C4265.CA199EBB.127733F1.IP)
<Skrail> Well, I obviously didn't think that one through
<Skrail> So, my USB stuff was acting silly, so I decided to reload the kernel usb drivers in an attempt to fix things.
<Skrail> So I happily type sudo rmmod usbhid into the terminal, tap enter on my keyboard, and then had an epiphany.
<Skrail> "Why," I thought to myself, "I'm using a USB keyboard and mouse!"
#295184
<teresah53> uninstalling shit.. brb
<Foxhill> you could just say you were going to the toilet like the rest of us
#180558
<RancorClaw> I like that hentai you recommended yesterday. I like how all the girls are sexually liberated, and can enjoy their sex lives
<RancorClaw> As opposed to the "typical" girl who's ashamed of her sexuality, and afraid to use it
<RancorClaw> And the contrast of the only boy being quite submissive towards all of the dominating women, is interesting as well
<keikii> why are you analyzing a hentai?
<RancorClaw> Because I'm stupid
#311162
<VesicantDerp> Is there a name for selling your blood plasma, then using that money to get super fucked up on a normal amount of booze while you're low on blood?
<SpaceMarine> no
<SpaceMarine> but there really should be
#1274
[kisama_] and no, amanda, my favorite monoply symbol is the cannon
[Amanda_] Because it symbolizes all the high powered ass pounding you do?
#41215
<simon-say> asking for relationship advice on irc is like asking for computer help at mcdonalds
#4324
<|hOrNeT|> Does anyone have Sims Vacation please that they can hook me up with?? I've been trying to get that for my girlfriend forever and I don't get any sex0r anymore if I can't get it