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#131840
<MartinRandom> Creepier yet the only japanese I know is how to say hello, goodbye, and how to respond when being raped
Comment: #raspberryheaven
#25047
<jko> When david was hit by a stone and knocked off his donkey we dont say "He was stoned off his ass"
#4231
(unchali) I was in gymnastics til I realized that fat chicks cause earthquakes
#9293
<egg> i had beer for breakfast yesterday
<Raz> egg: I had YOU for breakfast yesterday
<Raz> BECAUSE YOUR NAME IS "EGG." AND I HAD AN EGG I AM A COMEDY GENIUS
<egg> Raz: If that were so, i'd be playing havoc with your colon
<Raz> egg: You did :[
#19925
<Rodent> What? No pr0n on /.? What the hell is that site popular for?!
#27872
<uTi|Veridian> my HLTV tops out at about 30 people - then lags like your mom
<cyde> so tell me... if i used my mom in conjunction with your server... could we top 60?
<uTi|Veridian> can your mom handle 30 teenage boys?
<cyde> the question is....can 30 teenage boys....handle my mom?
#1058
<Chis> Away message on AIM: I am away from my computer right now. ( I final gotten my cable modem!!)
#26368
<ecco> HELLO MICROSOFT WORD SPELLCHECK
<ecco> spellcheck results for 'adn': amputate, arthritis, antidisestablishmentarianism, samurai, tissue, jetpack, George Orwell
#5309
<Zexion> Jewdass: well thats what I do when I want to get totally wasted... get some GOOD pot and drink a LOT of GOOD vodka
<|Ogreboy|> <Zexion> we call those weekdays
#4027
<RokChik> just had my first mammogram and anytime you flatten anything that much, it just ain't ever going back to being fluffy and firm again. I just may sue.
#44405
<Anomaly> I have a problem with my printer, can anybody help?
<Anomaly> I was printing out a photograph but the sun and the sky were messed up, they were black and purple
*** starwarsgamer has joined #outboards
<Galaxy Mage> Apparantly, your cyan-hole and your yellow-hole are clogged, but your magenta-hole and your black-hole are fine.
*** starwarsgamer has quit (sick fuckers)
<Galaxy Mage> ...
#35140
<_Sarah_> sorry, had a little visitor in a red sleeper show up
<Jason> is that code for your period?
<_Sarah_> LOL!
<Jason> ive bought tampons before, i know all about them
<_Sarah_> no.. it was my son, he got out of bed.. heh
#8465
<undrewb> I'm gonna make my thesis opensource so developers all round the world can work on it for me
#53901
<galisus> I think I realized I'd never touch Linux again when I was like.. "Holy shit I never have to deal with X11 EVER again.."
<galisus> It was like my first blowjob all over again.
<galisus> Good times.
#7952
<ZangTT> it's like a massive 300 story zombie john maynard keynes is wandering through california, tearing down buildings and breathing fire.
#23907
<mog> !8BALL WILL MARA KICK ME IN TWO SECONDS FOR ABUSING THE CAPS LOCK BUTTON?
<FarkStatsBot> mog: You may rely on it.
* mog was kicked by Mara (Caps abuse - 100%)
#45577
<Thrashmeister> if a piano player is called a pianist, then why isnt a racecar driver called a racist?
Comment: #dyo, irc.mediadriven.net
#38310
<@Zibro> [13:03] <Roommate> "1,100 registered sexual predators in the county.
<@Zibro> that made me think
<@Zibro> of an idea for a movie!
<@Zibro> ILLEGAL ALIEN VS SEXUAL PREDATOR
#27841
<Stevns> Mental note: when searching kazaa for southpark episode "cartman gets an anal probe", be sure to include the keyword 'southpark'!!!
#1023
<timmo> for hookers in vegas its like
<timmo> $500
<timmo> they better be fucking me while im playing quake and shit
#1151
<Synthrev> Ramen...coke is for pussies
<th0m> no, that's *cock*
#26214
<Dekkon> SHE HAS DSL
<Killrbyte> Digital Subscriber Line?
<nyisles> is it from Speakeasy?
<Killrbyte> Tell her to get cable. Its faster.
<Dekkon> DICK SUCKING LIPS
<Dekkon> DAMN NERDS
#75676
[Pk] well on aol they just let me click on whatever smiley i wanted. this website is too complicated
#59651
<qozi> Mmkay. Let this be a lesson to ya all
<qozi> getting piss drunk and playing with the flyback on a CRT is NOT the way to a "fun night".
<qozi> Although it is entirely entertaining to see people getting eletrozapped with enough force to clear several meters backwards
<qozi> such is NOT entertaining when it's your turn and you happen to be the only one bare-footed standing on wet grass outside.
<qozi> On the positive side, ether my body is still in shock, or running 20kVolts across your skin is a good way to prevent handovers, although my feet are still completly numb and unresponsive this wonderful morning.
Comment: Aftermath of a party at the electronics repair shop
#8701
*** jamesm sets mode: -snt
<jamesm> dunno why people keep fucking up the channel modes, like, who gives a fuck
<jamesm> oh my god, someone protect IRC!
<jamesm> fucking choad munching morons
*** cactoid sets mode: +k jamesmisgay