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#224378
*** Joins: Skrail (~Pleinair@8B4C4265.CA199EBB.127733F1.IP)
<Skrail> Well, I obviously didn't think that one through
<Skrail> So, my USB stuff was acting silly, so I decided to reload the kernel usb drivers in an attempt to fix things.
<Skrail> So I happily type sudo rmmod usbhid into the terminal, tap enter on my keyboard, and then had an epiphany.
<Skrail> "Why," I thought to myself, "I'm using a USB keyboard and mouse!"
#2934
<Potato> I've known her for years and I've always wanted to fuck her.
<Potato> But her last boyfriend was a 6 foot 7 black man.
<Potato> So I just don't try.
<Potato> I'm above average, but he was a giant black man.
<Potato> I mean, c'mon.
<Potato> He was like Godzilla, but black. Like Shaftzilla.
<memo> Did he smash Japanese skyscrapers with his dong?
<Potato> Yes.
<Potato> Yes he did.
#61663
<pm-> i am going into the bathroom now to count my money
<pm-> you guys ever do that?
<rigel> if by "count my money" you mean "masturbate" then yes
Comment: #philosophy
#27364
<sheeps> I had two chicks
<sheeps> in my room
<sheeps> I had two chicks
<sheeps> on my bed
<sheeps> I had two chicks
<sheeps> they did loom
<sheeps> I had two chicks
<sheeps> give me head
<sheeps> ok, the last bit was a lie
<sheeps> and I have no fucking clue what loom means but yeah
#7178
<BeLLa`> does sperm die when it hits the air, msg me if u know
<carcin0gen-> sounds like someone got a 3 pointer
#36969
<Kenji> why doesnt this shirt work for me
<Kenji> [04:35:37:AM] -> Server: privmsg lux :DCC SEND "v v v v v v v v v v v v v v v v v v v v v v v v v v v v v v v v v v v v v v v v v v v v v v v v v v v v v v v v v v v v v v v v v v v v v v v v v v v v v v v v v v v v v v v v v v v v v v v v v v v v v v v v v v v v v v v v v v v v v v v v v v v v v v v v v v v v v v v v v v v v v v v v v v v v v v v v v v v v v v v v v v v v v " 2130706433 3358
<Kenji> then nothing happens
<Kenji> or not
<rhoppenrath> shirt?
<rhoppenrath> it doesn't go with the pants
#64104
<pipo> ...um.
<pipo> ... kids these days ...
<pipo> just came from the strangest conversation with my little sister
<niccolo> ?
<pipo> she's reading the comics
<pipo> and she asks me
<pipo> "hey what's 'friendship-with-benefits?'"
<pipo> so I give the big brother response
<pipo> "it's a physical relationship, without any commitment"
<pipo> mind you, she's 11 and I don't want to get into much detail with my sis
<pipo> anyway she was quiet for a moment
<pipo> and then she goes
<pipo> "ok so like f***buddies then?"
<michelle_113> ...
<niccolo> dude wtf
#38932
<ridder[A]> hey did i tell you about the commentary i heard during the olympic rowing?
<ridder[A]> the germans won and the commentator goes
<ridder[A]> "they won because they had a superior race plan"
<ridder[A]> think about it
#176439
<IpodLinux> Ubuntu is African word for "I just switched from windows"
#4511
<OutLore> as a matter of fact, i'm jacking off right now.
<Synoptica> keep it in your pants
<OutLore> my hand or my penis?
<Synoptica> just shut it
<OutLore> shutting up
#40583
< bien> i'm going to go have a shower.
< Zoo> Have?
< vera> You're supposed to take showers.
< Zoo> It's the difference between a Canadian and an American mindset.
< Zoo> Canadians have things, Americans take them.
Comment: #kuro5hin/SlashNET
#3893
<elliptic> does any1 else name their member set/get functions with "Please" in the end?
#34188
<BalefireX> how goes the porn site Peppe316[0]?
<Peppe316[0]> I'm getting my clientel up first
<error> does your mom know yet?
<Peppe316[0]> no
<Peppe316[0]> I haven't talked to her for 10 weeks
<Peppe316[0]> it's nice
<Peppe316[0]> this freedom shit is the fun
<error> was it because she found out you drank and you didn't love the lord?
<Peppe316[0]> possibly
<Peppe316[0]> :(
<Peppe316[0]> er
<Peppe316[0]> :)
Comment: #gideontech
#16489
<zamros> WHEN I WAS LIKE SEVEN I SAW A CAR GET RUN OVER BY A CAR
<zamros> MY FIRST CAR ACCIDENT WITNESSING
<zamros> AND/OR MONSTER TRUCK RALLY
#1063
(nexxai) looking at porn with your dad's girlfriend in the room is weird
#5073
<langdon> win2k is tight.
<langdon> i added all my warez ftp sites to network neighborhood
#13246
ùíù You're now known as
<@> wtf
<@> what nick am I
#16274
<Calrathan> its amazinz;].jhv0z;].jhv0z;].jhv0z;].jhv how a little liquid in the keyboard can screw it up so much
#3469
<blazemore> Windows XP Professional Uptime: 4wks 4hrs 55secs
<blazemore> time to reboot
<ScumDog> that's so retarded
<mandarin> heh...uptime is sad
<mandarin> more sad is most *nix nerds have longer uptime records than relationship records ;)
<mightyflo> Relationship OSR2 Sexual Uptime: 2wks 6hrs 12secs
#24021
<YelseyKing> Y'know what the internet needs?
<Chocoboko> What?
<DragonFogel> Quality control? =P
<Kamui> Fewer "SpongeBob Squarepants" fansites?
#7065
<skatoni> will some one please help
<shev> ya?
<skatoni> there is a guy hacking into my computer
<shev> unplug your modem
<skatoni> how?
<shev> see those wires behind your computer?
<shev> rip'em all out
*** skatoni has quit IRC (Read error to skatoni[ppp012.rosenet.net]: Connection reset by peer)
#37265
* ankleteeth looks for good pr0n
<Eldritch> tell me if you find any o_O
<Eldritch> good porn is like... 5 leafed clovers
#7682
<landen:#math> It was started by Carl Sagan. For astronomers there is not a lot of difference between 10^9 and 10^12.
<asphyxia:#math> yeah, only three zeros
#19539
Eldoran : Umm lets see, it was recess during 4th grade and I was reading Return of the King, I think it was at the breaching of the gate.. but thats beside the point
Eldoran : Then a quasi friend in my class approaches me, and tries to "call me out"...
Eldoran : and I'm ignoring him... so he snatches my book from me and throws it on the ground.
CptAwesome : So you stabbed him
Eldoran : Hes standing square to me, with his fists up, and I step foward snap kick him in the crotch, then follow thru on the motion bringing my other legs knee up to his decending chin
CptAwesome : then you stabbed him?
Eldoran : No :{
CptAwesome : so, when the hell did you stab him?
Eldoran : I never did!
CptAwesome : Then how was this a fight?
#18506
[#HLM Gamesnet]
<+seph> ever wake up with a cat on your face?
<+seph> its kinda alarming
<+seph> you just woke up, not aware of anything, and you cant see
<+seph> and your mouth is filled with cat hair
<+seph> ewww
<@Timmy> nothing like waking up to a beautiful cute pussy in your face